


Haruu

by Reulte



Series: Haruu [1]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-10
Updated: 2016-04-09
Packaged: 2018-03-06 23:39:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 20
Words: 215,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3152591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reulte/pseuds/Reulte
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens after Order 66...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Duet

**Ahsoka Tano, Jedi**

Once she had been a warrior.

Haruu. Haruu. It was from a song of her people, so old even the eldest could not name its origins.

Haruu. Haruu. It had no real translation. It was something mothers whispered to their children to hush tears and heal their skinned knees, something to comfort them late at night.

She had known other warriors. 

They had fought together. He had taught her the virtues of experience.

They had laughed together. She had taught him the virtues of play. 

Haruu. Haruu. 

They had cried together; weeping over lost men and the broken bodies of brothers in arms.

They had shared fire and water and salt. They had shared food and the dangers of battle.

Haruu. Haruu. 

One day they had shared innocent kisses, soft and tender.

Haruu. Haruu. 

She had been made a knight. They had cut her braid of beads and she had given it to her fellow warrior with strong arms and straight aim; with honey-brown eyes and soft lips.

Haruu. Haruu. Tears fell from her eyes as she rocked back and forth.

One night they had shared soulful kisses wrapped in desire.

Haruu. Haruu. 

They had shared fire and water and salt. They had shared the comfort of their bodies. They had shared the joy of their spirits.

Haruu. Haruu. 

When she woke he was not there, but she felt the warmth of his arms around her, smelled his scent upon the bedclothes. She touched his despair through the Force, his self-loathing for what he thought had done. 

Haruu. Haruu. 

She had been hurt, angered, and said words she'd regretted even as they escaped her lips. He had been hurt, angered and his face had hardened into stone. 

Haruu. Haruu. 

She returned to Coruscant, to the temple and soon learned she would have a child. Her heart broke at what they would ask of her. Her heart was remade at what decided she would do. 

She had stood firm, facing warriors of greater age, greater ability and greater wisdom. They had expelled her from the order. They had taken her light saber and disassembled it. That should have been her master's duty, but he had looked at her with sorrowing eyes and handed the silver crystal weapon back. Other masters had declined her light saber but in the end, it was dismantled. She was no longer a Jedi. 

She had returned to her home world, to the lands of her family; neither in disgrace nor in triumph; simply returned. Her clan welcomed the hunter that was. Her family welcomed the child to be. 

Ahsoka's face was sweaty, her body weak, her spirit exhilarated. She reached out for the child in her mother's arms and he was handed to her. She inspected him, running her nose along his face for his scent. He had a thatch of dark hair; his eyes were a smoky blue. She wondered if they'd turn a soft honey-brown like his father's. He was perfect. He stretched his arms, opened his mouth and gave a shiver. She held him to her breast and pressed her nipple into his tiny mouth. 

Haruu, haruu, little one. Welcome to the world. 

Once she had been a warrior. Now, she was a mother. 

 

**Captain Rex, Clone**

Once he had been a soldier. 

He was trained to kill. 

He'd been bred and trained for war. He'd come out of Kamino to Geonosis with 144 troopers under his command. He had fulfilled his training, knowing nothing else. He had killed.

At Christophsis, they'd sent a kid to the battlefield. She may have been a Jedi, she may have been part of the Force but in the end she was just a kid. In his opinion, she shouldn't have been there. Never mind that she'd saved his life and the lives of his brothers, more than once. Whoever had sent her to the front deserved to die slowly and painfully. He would have killed whoever had ordered that if he had known. 

He'd seen her grow from a child to a woman in those two years. He'd seen her cry when men didn't come back. He'd see her try hard, harder to protect her men, seen her try to lift their spirits, seen her show them they were individuals. He'd seen the general ignore her more and more, absorbed in something or someone else. He's seen the lost look in her eyes. One day, he'd given her a kiss. He didn't know why. He would have killed himself if she had asked.

He compounded his mistake when he'd raped her. Never mind that she was willing. Never mind that it had been after battle and his blood was boiling with the thrill of being alive. Never mind that she was the most wonderful person he'd ever met. Never mind that she had cried out with pleasure and held him with no less passion. Never mind that she did not leave his bunk that night. Never mind that she had reach for him in the early hours of the next morning and he had taken her into his arms again. She was too young. He knew he should have killed lust for love.

She found him in the mess. She had spoken soft words and looked at him with sparkling eyes. She touched him with hands still warm from his caresses. He'd turned a deaf ear to her words, bowed his head before her eyes and jerked his hand back from her touches. He had turned to stone. He could have killed his brothers, witnesses to his silence. 

Then she was gone. He didn't know where, though he found out quickly enough, one night out of boredom, when he thought he had nothing better to do. She had returned to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. She, who had been the brightness of Torrent Company; who had been the touchstone for all the men, something fine and beautiful and compassionate, something to symbolize why they were fighting. He knew his brothers felt like killing him. 

At Order 66 he stood beside his general. He told himself he was there to follow orders; to eradicate the traitors but he lied. As he raced through the corridors of the Jedi temple, he searched for a slim Jedi even while firing upon the temple’s inhabitants. He lost men to Jedi light sabers and turned his blasters on the Jedi. He hadn't found her. He'd found bodies, old and young, too young to even understand the word 'traitor'. He found Fives throwing up in the corner of one of the rooms, his blaster hanging, forgotten, in one hand. He found Echo staring sightlessly out a window, blaster hot in his hands. He found Jester trembling, shaking, crying; his face pressed against his blaster, skin blistering from the heat of the barrel. He found General Skywalker, red eyed and deadly, and he was, for the first time in his life, terrified. He should have killed the general.

In the early morning of the next day Rex looked out at the sky red with flame and black with smoke. He took his blaster and his armor. In the early morning, Rex gestured to Echo, put his hand on Fives’ shoulder, and pulled Jester out of medical, his face not totally healed. No one stopped them; they looked official in their armor. They looked dangerous with their blasters. They simply walked onto a transport going somewhere else. 

Once he had been a soldier. Now he was a traitor.


	2. Following Order 66

**One Year after Order 66**

Ahsoka watched Barin as he toddled across the room, chewing on his fists. He removed his wet fingers to babble a few words, none intelligible to Ahsoka, but her sister, Aureki, claimed to understand some of those babbles.

As always, she was amazed at his perfection. His eyes had darkened to honey brown and sometimes her breath caught as she saw other men behind those eyes. She hadn't expected his dark hair to turn pale cream then the golden of his father's mutation. He didn't have lekku, but he did have rudimentary montrals and the echolocation senses. From his father he had inherited a perfect sense of balance, of knowing where he was in relation to those things around him. He had inherited perfect pitch, another gift of the clones’ perfection. Every day was a revelation of delight.

He was not Force sensitive and for that, Ahsoka was more grateful than she could understand. There was a bounty on all Jedi and Force-sensitive children. She didn't expect that to be resolved for a long time. Moreover, he was half Togruta and would never be totally accepted by her people. His father had been clone and there was no home to be had there either. To add Force sensitivity to his burdens would have made life so much more difficult than it was already going to be.

Still, he was loved. Ahsoka laughed as Barin bent and inspected the underside of the table with an intensity that elicited her own curiosity. She crawled on her knees and looked under the table. There was nothing there. She turned her head to Barin and he grabbed at her, burbling happily. She rolled on her back and tickled him, laughing as she enjoyed his squeals of delight. She let him go and he ran to hid behind a chair. On all fours, she stalked him.

Ahsoka hid herself from showing in the Force. Painfully and tearfully she had cut her connections with her past as Jedi; she rejected her master, with the men who'd fought with her and then destroyed the Jedi temple, massacring all within its tall walls. Ahsoka had severed herself from Rex; that had hurt the most and would never be completely gone.

She could not make her life's decisions with regard to the past. She could not look to some future when there were so many possibilities, so many of them dark. There was only the now.

Ahsoka regained her Togrutan heritage. She suppressed the individuality that was anathema to her people. She hunted with the other hunters for her family and clan. She was joyful. She learned how to be Togruta, how to live on Shili.

If sometimes she went out at night to look at the stars, her sisters didn't mention it. If she sometimes went hunting akul alone, her brothers didn't speak of it. If sometimes she seemed lost in memories, her mothers let her be. If she sometimes sat solitary on the stones, her fathers let her be.

One day she would have to leave. Her son would not fit into the clan – child of a Jedi knight and a clone captain, he'd be too individualistic for her people. She knew that one day she'd need to return to other worlds. Her home was not where her heart lived.

When the time came, she would open herself to the Force, to find out where she should go.

Barin came and patted her, pushed her from her stalking position and crawled into her lap to feed. She smiled lazily. There was no hurry.

From the two most impatient men in the galaxy, Ahsoka had learned patience.

**Two years after Order 66**

Jester and his brothers went to the Outer Rim where their lack of citizenship didn't prevent them from earning credits. They changed their armor; destroying the identifiers built into the helmets, modifying it to suit their new needs, their new wants and their new identities.

They worked mostly as bodyguards or took dangerous work requiring strength, silence, and physical prowess. Jester thought they were good at it. Other people thought so as well and the credits came. Not quick, but sufficient. They were still cautious. Traitor clones carried a bounty almost as high as the Jedi. Jester found dark amusement in knowing that he was worth more than he owned.

He was usually the front man, talking trade. People tended to look at Jester's half-melted scar rather than any identifying features of his face. He emphasized this in ways both subtle and sublime; reversing what he'd seen Chopper do long ago to hide his scars. Jester grew his hair shoulder length and braided beads in strands along his face; bright beads on the scarred side, matte colors on the unscarred side, often dying stripes of different shades into his hair or painting tattoos on his skin. He wore face paint as social camouflage. Sometimes, he limped; people remembered a limp and it was easily discarded. He acted loud, gregarious, adopted wide gestures, rude jokes and ruder behavior. Rex, Echo and Fives stayed in the background, always in armor, always in helmets.

Jester had always considered himself to be quiet; reserved, a solitary loner, a reader like Echo. Jester preferred stories and puzzles to Echo's enjoyment of instructions and science. Jester didn't like too much social interaction, but this needed doing and his face made him the best-suited for it.

Someone offered them a semi-legal job for relatively low pay to a planet called Saleucami and Jester was about to turn it down when he'd glanced at Rex who nodded. The job offered no problems. After receiving payment, Rex declared a holiday and laughingly took them out on a 35-klick run into farmland.

Rex got cautious as they neared what was obviously pasture and cropland. He warned them to be wary but to use no force and, as a brother rounded a tree, a deece in hand and a wide, surprised grin on his face, they understood why. Jester felt happy. It was good to see they weren't the only clones who'd escaped.

His name was Cut Lawquane and gripped Rex's arm in greeting as he nodded to the others.  "Times are a little rougher than they used to be," he gave a nod at his military deece. "I've had to scare off a few drifters."

Rex clasped hands with the farmer and turned to his men. "Cut, this is Echo, Fives and Jester. My crew. Cut Lawquane, farmer and the only man I know who destroyed fourteen commando droid by himself."

Cut laughed as he gave a depreciating half-grin but he didn't deny it and Jester was impressed.

They walked down to the farm, a lean Twi'lek girl and a lean Twi'lek boy running to meet them coming up the speeder lane, A woman in the doorway of the house held a long rifle at the ready in her capable hands - in case.

As they drew closer, Jester noticed the woman's face was thin with dark circles under her eyes and there was a round ball of weight centered on her belly. She was pregnant. Jester's breath caught in his heart. This brother had a family. He turned back to Cut who had both pride and worry in his dark eyes as he nodded to the woman.  Tiredly, she lowered the weapon and turned back into the small house.

Jester helped Cut fix dinner while the Cut's son, Jek, made sure the eopies were secure and helped Fives pull out some coverlets to set up sleeping arrangements in the barn. Shaeeah, Cut's daughter, was catching the nuna and penning them for the night with help from Echo who had the hard part of chasing the quick, agile creatures. Suu went up to rest, Rex offering his arm as she climbed the stairs.

Suu didn't come down for dinner and Cut fixed a plate for her. He was upstairs for a long while and it was Shaeeah who headed the table.

"Mom isn't having an easy time and dad's frightened for her." She spoke softly as she served them large portions of the roast and vegetables, taking a smaller amount for herself and Jek. "Mom says it's the work. It's our busy time of the year and there's so much to do with harvest that we're all exhausted by bedtime."

"We'll stay for a while, Shaeeah," Rex spoke. "We don't know a lot about farming…"

Jek laughed, "Like dad when he first came here."

Rex and Fives had laughed at that, Echo and Jester smiled, "Very much like that." Rex agreed. "But we'll work hard and we learn fast."

"That would be great," said Cut as he came downstairs and sat with them, the worry outweighing the pride in his eyes. After dinner, Shaeeah and Cut cleared the table. Jek washed the dishes with only a minimum of fuss and it was easy to see the entire family was worried.

Cut laid his blaster on the table with the cartridge removed. "Disassemble and clean it, Shaeeah." He looked at the soldiers around her, "If one of you would supervise?" he asked as he picked up the rifle. "I have rounds to do." Rex rose to go with him and Jester nodded, sitting next to the girl as she started on the weapon. After a quick inspection of his face, the painted tatoos and the beads, neither Shaeeah nor Jek stared at him. They knew it wasn't his true face.

"Mom and dad say Saleucami's getting rougher than it used to be." Shaeeah told Jester as her fingers moved over the blaster. She wasn't fast but Cut had been thorough in teaching her and she didn't pause or hesitate. "About once a week, a drifter comes and tries to steal something. Usually a nuna or eggs. Occasionally something from the barn. It really upsets Mom. She's scared the drifters will hurt me or Jek or dad. She hates seeing us with the weapons."

Jester nodded noncommittally. "I haven't seen much of the war from this side until pretty recent. I guess you know who and what I am."

"Like dad. A soldier and a clone." She looked at him.

He tilted his head in thought. "I use to be a soldier. Not anymore. Being a clone was simply the way I began. Now I’m just Jester; doing what I have to do to keep us together, to keep us safe."

"Does it hurt?" she asked, recognizing the scar as real in his face. Her fingers reached up to his face without touching him.

"Not much. It hurts less than not having it would hurt." Jester remembered what he'd done in the Jedi temple, what he would have become if Rex hadn't taken him.

She looked at him through narrowed eyes, her fingers pausing. "Is that one of those grown-up ‘you’ll understand when you’re older’ answers?"

He laughed. "No. It's a soul answer."

"I heard that clones don't have souls, that they're barely capable of thought." Shaeeah watched him carefully. She’d heard it on one of the radio program and the one time she'd mentioned it to dad; he'd walked out of the room all pale and scary. But she was older now, more grown-up and it seemed important.

Jester smiled. "Do you believe that? Either part of that? Of your dad? Of Rex or any of us here now? Do you believe that we're less than other people? Do you believe we can't think or love or enjoy good stories and good company?"

Shaeeah paused a moment, thinking then returned her attention to the blaster. "No."

"Then you don't have to worry about it anymore, do you?"

"I guess not." She smiled. "I like your voice. It has honey in it."

Jester laughed. "My first compliment. Thank you."

The blaster was clean and reassembled, lying on the table. Jester was telling Shaeeah and Jek one of the fables he'd read, Fives and Echo listening in, when Rex and Cut returned. They sat down, quiet and listening until Jester finished. Jek had fallen asleep and Fives picked him up and mounted the stairs. Shaeeah, yawning, went first to show him where the bedroom was.

"What's this I hear about the Jedi being traitors?" asked Cut in a low voice. He could see the question hurt, and immediately regretted asking it but it was out now and there was no taking it back. Echo looked down at his hands on the table; Jester looked down to his hands in his lap, neither man willing to begin.

"I don't know," replied Rex softly. "We were part of the 501st that stormed the Jedi temple on Coruscant and I'm still not sure what happened." He was silent for a moment. "It was supposed to be a moment of glory; the defeat of the traitors to the Republic after their illegal attempt to arrest Chancellor Palpatine. We went in and killed everyone and everything alive in there. Including children. Including babies barely old enough to walk."

Rex's voice caught and they could all hear the tears. There was a soft whimper from Jester and tears streaming down Echo's cheeks.

Rex not finished with his story, continued. "The general was a Jedi, one of the good guys, we thought, and not part of the Jedi coup. He led us into the temple. He killed a group of younglings in less time than it takes to think about it." Rex shuddered and Cut placed his arm over the other's shoulders in support.

"Remember what I said about being part of the most pivotal moment in history? We failed because we didn't stand up against that act. Evil has prevailed. I came here because my family out there doesn't exist anymore. Now my family is Echo, Fives and Jester. Fives was puking his guts out, Echo contemplating suicide and Jester was in a corner crying with his blaster pressed to his face. I couldn't leave him in med bay alone when we ran and we had to get out immediately."

Echo pressed the heels of his fisted hands to his eyes clearing his tears. Fives had come down the stairs and understood immediately what they were talking about. He'd gone into the kitchen to wait. Jester heard the running of water, Fives splashing his face.

"Any other troopers run like that?" asked Cut.

"I've heard of a couple, saw a clone bounty hunter once but didn't know who it was. I heard that a few of the Jedi escaped. Don't know who. Echo might, he researches." Rex glanced toward Echo.

"Anytime you want to know, I'll tell you what I have." Echo's voice was somber.

Cut nodded, stood and Rex stood with him.

"Gentlemen, our beds await. I think tomorrow with be a busy day."

The next day, Cut paired with Rex, Shaeeah with Echo and Jek with Fives as they went on their tasks. Jester stayed in the house with Suu while she slept late then bringing breakfast to her bed. He insisted she sleep or rest. When she wanted to go outside on the porch to enjoy the day, he set up a chair with cushions, a cover and a place to set her feet up. He assisted her down the stairs with a strong arm. He called her ma'am and she smiled absently. He also rested; they had decided to begin night watches and he had the first night. He pulled the beads out of his hair, washed himself in the cold water of the barn trough and came to sit before her, damp and newly clean. He asked her to cut his hair. When she asked how he wanted it cut, he said 'short'. He felt reborn as black hair fell to the porch.

The weeks passed quickly with the hard work on the farm, but Jester knew their presence made a difference. After a few encounters with the ex-troopers, drifters no longer came by the farm. Suu no longer had dark circles under her eyes and laughed about how she moved with all the grace of a bantha. Jester made it his priority to ensure her every need was answered. Shaeeah and Jek had time in the evening to go over studies. Echo and Fives assisted, usually taking opposite sides of every debate. Rex and Cut played dejarik like two old patriarchs. There was peacefulness that soothed Jester's troubled soul.

Jester was washing the dishes while Suu sat at the table. He'd just finished telling her a joke when he noticed she looked at him oddly and her words scared him.

"Cut, what happened to your face?"

She was looking at him quizzically and she stood. Jester was moving his hands from the water in some battle-honed instinct when her eyes went back in her head and she dropped. He caught her before she hit the floor. Her back arched and her limbs stiffened in a convulsion.

He was on the comm link immediately, his normally soft voice in command decisiveness. "Cut. Echo. Get back to the house. Rex, take the speeder and get a medic. Suu's having convulsions." He was glad they'd done a practice run.

Pulling a coverlet off the couch for her, Jester did what he could to make her comfortable on the floor. She woke a little and looked at him, reaching for him, smiling. "Cut, lie down and hold me.  I'm cold." Then her eyes rolled back and she convulsed again.

Jester was counting minutes when Cut pulled open the door, breathing hard, hair no longer neatly tied back. Suu was lying on the floor with Jester at her side. Before Cut lay beside his wife, her glazed eyes opened to Jester and she lay her hand on his face, "I love you, Cut."

Jester replied, "I love you too, Suu." Then she smiled, closed her eyes, and Jester looked to Cut. "Get down here. She's about to..."

Cut dropped to the floor beside Suu. Jester released her into Cut's arms as she convulsed, her back arching, her limbs stiffening. As Cut held her, Jester wiped the sweat from her face with a cool rag.

Echo was there then, with Shaeeah who quickly paled and sat at the table, out of the way. He quickly checked her vitals, and hissed between his teeth. "Stay with us, Suu. Jester, convulsions duration and time?"

"Three convulsions, about three to five seconds duration. Twenty minutes apart." Jester replied. "But she's not coherent in-between.”

Then Echo was on the wrist com. "Rex when you get someone, tell her it's probably eclampsia."

Cut let out a garbled plea. "She's got three more weeks."

Echo shook his head. "I don't think so. The medic will probably have to do a c-sec to save her life. We need some magnesium sulfate. Shaeeah, find some. It's like bath salts or hot soak."

Shaeeah was quickly on her feet, running to the linen closet.

Cut looked as though he were going to cry. "Not my Suu. Not my baby." He held her in his arms. Shaeeah was back with a box and a jar, her face pale. Jester took them and read the labels, setting aside the jar in favor of the box.

"Expect another convulsion, soon," said Jester even as Suu's eyelids fluttered and she opened her eyes.

"I'm thirsty, Cut. Please get me something to drink." Her eyes fluttered shut and she shuddered then convulsed again. Cut held her, tears in his eyes.

They heard Shaeeah in the kitchen, getting water. When she came into the room, her face was still pale, but stoic. She passed the glass to Jester sitting next to her mother. He smiled wanly at her and took it, pouring a small handful of the magnesium salt into it. She sat next to him and he gave her a quick, comforting hug as he passed the glass to Echo.

"Why don't you made something for Fives and Jek and take it out to them," Echo suggested and Shaeeah nodded, moving to the kitchen.

Echo and Cut got Suu awake sufficiently that they felt they wouldn't drown her pouring the mix down her throat.  The magnesium broke the convulsion cycle for a short time.

Before they heard the speeder truck, Suu woke up twice more, had another, milder convulsion. Rex came in, grim-faced, carrying a medical kit in one hand, pushing an angry Twi'lek in front of him looking suspiciously like a kidnap victim.

"Do." He commanded and the doctor, confronted with a patient in obvious need, lost his anger and did. Jester and Rex went outside, Fives and the kids joined them after a while, coming from the barn.

There wasn't much noise and that scared Jester. On the battlefield, no noise meant dead men. The living made noise. Moans, groans, cries, pleas, curses, screams, sobs. Only the dead were silent.

Cut came outside, sweating. There was strain on his face, scratches and bruises on his arm from Suu's grip. He sat heavily on the bench and put his face in his hands. "He's not sure he can save both. He wanted me to choose."

No one asked.

"Do you want me to go in and help," asked Jester.

"No, I'll go back in a few minutes. Echo ordered me out for at least a walk around the barn and house." He stood and Jester stood with him.

"Come on then," said the trooper.

"I'd prefer alone," said Cut.

Jester shook his head. "No brother should go through this alone." He put his arm around Cut's shoulder. "I've got your back, Cut. Let's walk."

Jester saw that the offer alone brought more tears to Cut's haggard face.

They returned shortly and Cut went back into the house. It was getting on toward nightfall and Fives took Jek to make sure the eopies were secure. Rex and Shaeeah secured the nuna. Then Rex handed her his blaster and they went on rounds.

Jester went back into the small house that was so quiet and did what he could to help. The doctor said that if all went well, Suu would need bed rest for several weeks. Jester went and changed the linens on the bed. Echo said a pre-mature child would need to be kept warm. Jester collected blankets. He handed drinks of juice to the three men. He noticed Suu's hands contracting in cramps and massaged them.

Finally the doctor said, "This is too long with no progress; time for intervention. You," he pointed to Cut. "And you," The same finger turned to Jester. "Need to hold her. I've given her what I can, but it will still be painful. Make sure her hands come nowhere near the incision and one of you, be ready for the baby."

He turned to Echo, "Ready to assist?"

Echo nodded, jaw firm against his emotions.

Suu screamed once as her hands reached downward to discover the pain, but they held her hands and Cut whispered into her face. "Suu, I love you. Please, just a few seconds. Remember when I first came here? I loved you right away. Just a few seconds and we'll have a baby. Suu, what will we name him or her? Suu, Suu. Please stay with me."

The Twi’lek reached _into_ Suu and pulled out the baby, wet and red, and handed it to Echo who held it at an upside down angle for a moment then gave a tired, lop-sided grin as the child sucked in a breath and squalled. The cord was quickly tied off and cut. Echo handed the child to Jester who cradled it in his arms, terrified of damaging the tiny child. Echo turned back to assist the doctor with the process of mending the incision in Suu's pink skin.

Suu took in big gulping breaths as Cut now held both her hands captive in a one-handed grip, caressing her face with his free hand. "It's ok, love. We have a baby. Don't go, Suu. I love you. I don't know what to do without you. Don't leave, Suu."

Jester noticed it first, her attention was back. Her words removed all doubt. "Where would I go without you, Cut?" Her voice was weak. Relieved, Cut kissed her, stroked her lekku, her face, her arms, her hands, tears of joy in his eyes.

The doctor gave her an antibiotic and a pain patch for Cut to carry her upstairs to the bed then turned to the babe in Jester's arms. Poked and prodded, the baby's squalls turned into a full-throated crying roar.

"Better get this one upstairs to mother," chuckled the doctor as he began packing his bag and Jester carefully carried the precious child up the stairs, protected in his strong arms. Echo was sprawled on his back in the mess of water, blood and juice which someone had tipped over.

"I do not ever want to do that again," he gasped to the ceiling.

"You did not bad for a combat medic." The doctor had obviously made the connection of the five mostly-identical men. "If you stay on Saleucami, I could train you a little better. You could make good money."

"Thanks for the offer,” replied Echo, still staring at the ceiling. “But I don't think so. I was never a medic."

"Then you did very well." grinned the older Twi-lek.

Jester smiled at that as he took the baby up the last few steps.

The baby was a boy and Echo told Jester that someone's count must have been off or it was the Twi'lek-human mix because he was healthy and full term weight.

Cut asked Suu if they could name the child Keeli River and Jester knew he'd been with Captain Keeli's River Company. They'd lost a troop carrier not long after Geonosis, the rest of the company on Ryloth sometime later.

Rex would look at the child with wide, sad eyes. Jester knew the captain was wondering what a child of his would look like. Having seen Keeli River Lawquane, they all wondered what their own child might look like.

Jester spent a lot of time holding the child, running errands for Suu, reading to her as she recovered and carrying the boy for her as she slowly regained her strength over the weeks. It would be a long time before she was healed, before she could work the farm with Cut. Cut's family needed his brother.

When Rex left Saleucami, his family was short one member. Jester stayed.

**Three years after Order 66**

Aureki thought Barin was a perfect child. A bit stubborn, perhaps. More individual than her people liked, but so was Ahsoka and Ahsoka was her beloved sister. Beloved for having been gone so long. Beloved for returning. Beloved for sharing Barin.

Ahsoka was the hunter while she was the _ta-harr_ – the fire-keeper, the keeper of the home. She was proud of her work. Their home was comfortable, welcoming, and warm; with a bit of childish mess. There was no mistaking that this home had a child. She took care of Barin while Ahsoka hunted and Barin called her 'mama' as well. It was no oddity to have two mothers in a home. The oddity was having no father but no one among the clan would have Aureki and Ahsoka would have no one among the clan.

Barin was four and Ahsoka was showing him an akul tooth, explaining its dangers and why they hunted the akul. He was uncomfortable in his white cotton pants and kept pulling at the waist; clothing was the introduction to the world of older children. Most children would pull off their clothing at first chance, Barin hadn't. He recognized it as a change in status. He delighted in playing with the older children who often wouldn't play with the ‘babies’ who ran naked.

Ahsoka and Aureki sat, cross-legged, on the soft pelt rug and laughed while Barin pretended to hunt the akul under a table and behind a desk. The fire was a warm glow, perfect for the oncoming chill of the evening, and they'd already eaten. Barin had been bathed and his golden hair glistened sunset red with the fire's reflection.

The akul under the table died and Barin came to his two mothers and, plopping himself down between them, smiled. "Tell me a story about da."

Aureki saw Ahsoka's mouth twitched in sorrow that she would not show. There was sorrow in Ahsoka's heart and some small anger. Ahsoka had told her that Barin’s father had insulted her, refused her. In spite of Ahsoka’s anger, there was so much love for him that Aureki sometimes cried herself to sleep at night simply to know her sister had loved this much.

Ahsoka reached behind her and grabbed the holovid stand. It was Barin's favorite because, in a way, it was about him. She set it on and the blue light reflected in the room, merging with the fire's red glow to give a more life-like color to the hologram. A man stood in the light, a warrior in honor-marked armor, firing blasters. He glanced behind him and waved onward as he gracefully pushed himself forward from the boulder he stood on. Several more warriors ran on either side of him.

"Echo gave me this before I left. He pulled it from Fives' helmet vid and thought I would like it." Ahsoka smiled softly.

Then she continued in a stronger voice, a teaching voice. "That's your da, Barin. When I knew him, he was Captain of Torrent Company in the 501st. He is a fine warrior and you are very much like him."

The holo changed and the man was out of uniform, eating off a tray, obviously surprised and a little miffed, to Aureki's eyes, to be the subject of Ahsoka's holocam. It was also very evident to Aureki that this man was Barin's father. From his golden hair to the eyes of honey brown, Aureki knew what Barin would look like in twenty years. Perhaps with a narrower chin and softer lips, the form of rudimentary montrals, the heritage of his birth-mother, giving a slightly different shape to his skull.

The hologram flared and another scene came up and Barin gave a small cheer. It was Barin's favorite. Aureki sighed. A boy's favorite, a warrior's favorite. The captain and another man, Ahsoka identified him as Echo, were fighting. Ahsoka said it was practice, but it looked entirely serious to Aureki. The men moved stealthily with quick moves and throws, punches and kicks that seemed as though they'd be deadly or incapacitating. But at the end of the holo, the two men had laughed and the captain had put his hand down to help his defeated brother rise from the padded floor.

Except for the golden hair of the captain, the men looked identical. Ahsoka had explained that to Aureki although to Barin she had simply said "They are twin brothers."

Then there was the last holo. Ahsoka's favorite as well as Aureki's because it seemed to tell so much about the man.

He was sitting in a corridor; his honor-marked armor dirty, his helmet in his hand and his attention forward. Then he heard something for he turned his head to the side and looked at the holocam. There was wariness as he looked. Then he relaxed, gave a soft, tired smile and turned his head back to whatever had his attention.

"That's the medical unit," Ahsoka had explained to both Barin and Aureki. "There are wounded men in there and he will not leave; no matter how late, no matter how tired he is, until he knows about his troopers." There were tears in Ahsoka's eyes. She remembered that battle. Men had died.

Barin was mostly asleep, his eyes barely open, and Aureki picked him and walked him into his room. She put him in bed and he immediately curled up around Ahsoka's old Jedi cape that was his favorite blanket.

Aureki went back to the main room. She checked the fire and saw Ahsoka still staring at the paused holo image. Aureki nodded to herself. Tonight,  Ahsoka would go into the treetops to watch the stars. It was that kind of mood. Aureki fixed her a small hunter's pack to take then sat across her sister.

"I hate him, Aureki."

"Ssth," Aureki hissed. "It is not right that a hunter should lie to herself."

"He did not stop the rumors. He didn't do anything as the troopers, the men he called brothers, gave me dishonorable names or touched me as I walked in the hallway. 'Sorry, ma’am, sorry commander' they sometimes said. 'Hallway's a bit crowded, commander,' as they brush against me, or touched me in intimate places. All, so carefully, calculatedly accidental."

"They were not all like that." Aureki had heard parts of this before, each time with a little more information of Ahsoka's past. Each time she understood a bit more.

Ahsoka dropped her head, tears falling down her cheeks as she gave a tight smile. "No. Some men fought for me. It's call one-on-one. I never understood the full rules, but it's how they settle disagreements. They fight. They don't even have to name the reason, it's usually well-known among the troopers. Men sit behind the fighter of their opinion. Sometimes, they'll have it so that if the first man falls, another will take his place. I think that was the difference between what they called 'bloody sorrow' and 'bloody regret'. Sometimes not." She shrugged. "As I said, I didn't know the full rules. As commander, it was supposed to be below my notice. It was an internal mechanism for keeping disagreement from tearing apart the company which would have affected their readiness to battle. It is the captain's job to make sure they were all battle-ready so he should have been monitoring the rumors and the fights.  He or his delegate would oversee to make sure no one was permanently injured and that the rules were followed."

Her hand reached for the holovid, her finger skimming through the image of him staring into medical, turning towards Aureki. "Echo fought for me, several times. Fives fought; I think he and Echo alternated. So did Jesse and that surprised me." Ahsoka smiled wryly through her tears. "He and I started off in misunderstanding and never got to straighten it out. Countdown fought. Chopper fought. So many of my men fought for me, for my honor. But rumor is stronger and faster than the truth."

Ahsoka took a deep breath; cleansing for both her mind and her body.

"The General..." she began. Aureki knew there was more sorrow there, but Ahsoka had never told her that story. "The General said that if Rex called a one-on-one, he could and would go sit Rex's side. He said that would stop the rumors. But Rex never called out a man. I left when Echo and Fives said they would call out the captain and beat him to bloody sorrow."

"Why did you leave? My sister, the Jedi knight," asked Aureki softly.

"For troopers to call out their captain means they don't think he is doing his job, that he isn't fit to lead them."

"And that would destroy the battle-readiness as well." Aureki nodded.

"My departure put an end to it all."

Aureki smiled. "You love him, then. Leaving so he would not have to face men he led in battle and know they did not trust him."  She gestured to the holo of the man intent upon his wounded warriors.  "This man would have been destroyed by that revelation."

Ahsoka tilted her head and thought. "I think you're right about that. It was another reason that my departure from Torrent was a good idea." She rose, gracefully, to her feet and gave her sister a hug and soft kiss on the cheek. She picked up the small packet of tidbits for her stargazing.

"Will you ever search him out, sister?"

Ahsoka shook her head as she opened the door to leave. "He led the soldiers that destroyed the Jedi temple." She softly closed the door behind her.

**Four Years after Order 66**

Fives had finished his duty for the evening as bodyguard to some local Twi'lek warlord or freedom fighter though there wasn’t much difference. Their titles didn't matter to him, only their pay. He joined Echo in the double room they shared with Rex, removing the armor and bodysuit to take a long, hot shower. It was a luxury he had grown to love after the lukewarm, crowded shower rooms of the _Resolute_ and countless barracks or the cold showers of so many other war-torn places.

Echo was still on the computer when Fives came sauntering out with his hair damp and his skin pink from the heat. A billow of steam rolled out with him.

"Echo," he said laughingly, "Get off the computer. You'll go blind doing that for too long."

Echo nodded and absently spoke. "In a moment."

His tone caught Fives' attention.

"What are you doing?" Fives pulled on some loose, comfortable pants and picked up his armor from where he had dropped it in his single-minded intent of a shower.

"Checking clones."

"Hell of a hobby." Fives half-grunted and half-laughed as he sat on his bunk to begin cleaning his armor. They had all modified their armor to a more Mandalorian appearance and Fives had painted his a dusty grey mottled with drab burnt orange to blend into the Ryloth landscape. He missed the solid white it used to be. Somehow, his armor seemed diminished to be any color other than white with blue trim.

"It's a good hobby," defended Echo. "I talked to Rex about trying to find one or two."

"I bet he didn't like that."

"We've got our family but we can't be the only ones." Fives saw a grin begin on Echo's face. "Besides, I'm getting tired of looking at you two and want to look at some different faces when I come home."

Fives guffawed at that. "You can go back to Saleucami. Stay with Cut and family. Or maybe move in with Jester in his digs as he courts that nurse. There's a different face."

"A very nice one, too. Unfortunately, that's a bad idea. Jester can be pretty possessive."

Fives nodded. "Well, if you were looking for a wife, wouldn't you be? Saleucami has a bad male to female ratio. Twenty to one. Or so you told me."

Echo shrugged. "I'll have to get me a wife before I find out if I’m possessive." He scratched his chin. "But I don't think so. Women are so infrequent in my life that …" his voice faded and he shrugged again.

"Then get off that 'puter and come out tonight with me." Fives urged. "I'll find us a beautiful, sexy woman and we can share. Maybe I'll find two or three and we can bring one for Rex."

Echo smiled and shook his head. Fives did that often. He had a way with females of most species and they usually had a friend or he'd convince them that two men were twice as attentive as one. There was no sexual selfishness in Fives. No possessiveness at all.

Echo decided the problem was him; too reticent, too quiet to attract attention from a woman or keep it for long. He laughed. "Not tonight. I've got plans for us."

"Us?" Fives voice was not encouraging.

"You're right. Rex didn't like it, but he didn't say anything. So we're going to check for a clone and I want you at my back in case he isn't what he seems to be. Or in case he is and happens to be better than me."

"Unnhh," moaned Fives as he flopped back on the bed. "Don't wanna go. Wanna go bar. Get drink. Get woman."

"Armor up, brother."

"I just took a shower." It was a beautiful whine and Echo laughed at the way Fives drew it out.

"Look at it this way," proposed Echo. "It means you can have another long, hot shower when you get back."

"What about woman?" said Fives with one opened eye.

"You're on your own there, brother," sighed Echo. "But we should be back before the bars close."

Fives grinned and began pulling on his half-cleaned armor. A woman could wait; adventure with his brother was usually a lot more interesting. Sometimes even fun.

\--------------------

From the corner of his eye, Waxer caught movement outside the window. It was a dark night, but his training and the newer, necessary paranoia saw the slight movement of men. His heart caught in his throat. He'd worried about this ever since he'd walked off the battlefield in disgust after Order 66. Boil had stayed to cover his desertion and had said he would be running himself soon. Officially, Waxer was KIA. But, with more clones running their shared face became more common, more recognizable and the bounty on a clone was more than decent. He hadn't heard from Boil in a while. So many possibilities ran through his mind, none that he liked.

Waxer found his blaster easily in the dark. It was his hovel, small with a kitchen, a common room, and two tiny bedrooms with an adjoining toilet and he knew it as well as he knew his face. He had built it in the ruins of the village they had found Numa in years earlier. It was just enough for him and Numa. When Boil came back they'd add another room. If Boil came back. It had been almost three years now since Waxer had run. Long past the 'couple of months' they'd originally planned on, Boil always saying he was onto something important.

Waxer grimaced. Maybe they wouldn't have to add another room. Numa was gone. Waxer had his suspicions. This was Ryloth, after all; home of all the beautiful Twi'lek dancers. Ryloth, where years of fighting had impoverished the population. Ryloth where people made money however they could.

He moved easily and silently toward the door, fingers firm around the blaster.

Waxer had wanted to adopt her, but adoption was for citizens and that left him out completely. Her uncle permitted Numa to live with Waxer. It saved him food, he said. A few days earlier, he had come to their home and taken her. To live with him, he said, as was legal. Yesterday, when Waxer had gone to visit Numa, she was nowhere to be found and no one would look him in the eyes. She was only eleven, almost twelve. _Too young_ , Waxer thought. Apparently, her family hadn't thought her too young.

Waxer wondered if his existence and location had been sold to bounty hunters. He sighed. Time to move when you had questions like that running through your mind. But finding Numa was more important.

Waxer's lips twisted as he hid beside the heavy stone pillar of the doorway. He figured he'd get at least two, maybe four good shots. It would depend on how many there were, how they rushed the door. He had to survive for Numa’s sake.

Voices outside the door confused him and he listened.

"Just … knock," said one exasperated voice so familiar. The voice of one clone, the voice of all.

"What if he's not happy to see us? What if I've miscalculated?" Same voice, different man.

"Echo!" growled the first voice. Waxer smiled wistfully as he recognized, not the voice, but the tone. Boil and he often used it with each other. Two men so different, you'd never think they could even be friends. Brothers by choice.

"What do you want?" He called out. There was silence.

"He wants to talk to you," said exasperated voice

Waxer considered a minute. If they'd been Imperials or bounty hunters, they wouldn't have bothered talking to him. They'd have come in with their blasters. He opened the door. If they were stormtroopers he was dead and no one would go after Numa.

The two brothers were in modified Phase 1 armor, painted merc style. It was a common clone fashion these days. Blasters in holsters, they walked into the small room at his gesture, the ceiling barely taller than their helmets. Waxer motioned to the bench and sat in the one chair by the table lightly setting his deece near his hand.

"Talk," he said, "But make if fast, I have to leave soon. I have an appointment with an informant."

One of the clones sat on the bench and removed his helmet. The other took the door as guard and Waxer had a sudden wrenching emptiness of missing Boil.

The seated clone opened his lips, but realized he hadn't made sufficient plans of what to say. "I'm Echo, he's Fives. We used to be with the 501st." He paused, giving the other clone time to give his name. Waxer didn't. "You don't have to answer any questions. Mostly I just want to know other brothers who deserted. Your experience of what happened after Order 66. Just to sit down and just talk. To know we're not the only ones who're doing ok."

Waxer sighed and shook his head. "Bad timing. I was just gearing up to go find my daughter, my adopted daughter. Her uncle sold her." He saw unspoken messages pass as his two visitors looked at each other. He bowed his head, wishing Boil was there with him. He looked into Echo's eyes.  He missed Boil.

"I could use some help." He asked softly.

Fives, still at the door, shook his head. Echo sighed. "I don't think we both can. Maybe one of us can go."

"I'll go," volunteered Fives. "Your shift will be coming up." He turned to Waxer. I can give you until midmorning tomorrow. Maybe Rrr," he paused.

Waxer gave a half smile. "Rrr? Would that be as in Rex? I read watch lists too. I even met the Captain when he was here with …the Jedi… about five years back." He seemed to chew on his lower lip. "He might help too."

\------------------------------

Waxer was sitting at the table when Rex walked into the double room pulling off his helmet. Fives had encouraged Waxer to have a long, hot shower and Waxer hadn't needed much encouragement. He was clean, freshly-shaved and wearing some clothes Fives had loaned him. The conversation with Rex had been surprisingly short.

"Hello Captain Rex," Waxer began.

"Just Rex these days."

"I need help getting Numa, my ..."

"I remember Numa," said Rex with a slight smile.

"Her uncle sold her and I want her back then someplace safe."

Rex dropped his head in his own private pain. Waxer waited. Then Rex nodded. "We're in."

\------------------------------

 _You don't mess with slavers_ , muttered Fives to himself. It was commonly accepted wisdom in the Outer Rim. Fives decided that better wisdom would be you don't mess with brothers.

He didn't have any real moral argument against slavers. According to the Rights of Sentience he didn't have even as many rights as a slave. He was merchandise, bought and paid for and, except for the slavers firing at him, he had it pretty good. Behind his helmet, he had a snarling grin as he shot his blaster toward the group, making sure to shoot high to avoid the kids. Slavery was nothing. Theft was something entirely different.

As a trooper, he hadn't seen any theft in the barracks. A trooper had only his armor and gear; easily replaceable or traceable. Clone troopers didn't earn credits so couldn't buy anything but they had no need of anything beyond what was provided. Fives glanced over to Waxer. He had run without his armor, but his face was no less terrifying than those helmed visages. Rage glittered in his eyes; his face was a stony mask of hate. He was shooting high, but barely higher than the tallest child.

Theft was something entirely different.

To steal something from a clonetrooper meant you had to steal something intangible. His comfort, perhaps or a good night's sleep. Jester had told him how Slick had stolen Chopper's self-confidence. The war had stolen away ability and life. Order 66 had stolen away the soul of every clone who participated and Fives counted himself in that number. The slavers had made the mistake of stealing something very valuable from Waxer; his heartbeat.

Echo and Rex were coming up behind the slavers and should start firing … Fives grinned as he heard the sound of blaster fire, the clones' military issue heavier, more deadly. He loved being part of a well-oiled unit. He moved in with Waxer as the slavers' attention was diverted to their rear for an instant.

Waxer's eyes swept over the group of kids, that stony face of hate gone. He started moving to one small group of children.

"Numa, get down." Then spoke again in Twi'lek and that bright girl, already crouched, grabbed hands of her neighboring kids and pulled them down to the ground with her.

Waxer was shooting level now. He dropped one of the Weequay and was immediately targeting another slaver. Fives covered as Waxer moved closer in, pushing children down to the ground with one hand, firing his blaster with the other.

Then the slavers were dead. The two-pronged and militarily precise attack had them dead before they could figure out a counter. Fives looked over to Waxer. He was smiling, holding Numa tightly and conversing with her in a mix of Twi'lek and Basic. She had her arms around his neck, dried tears on her face, now happily giggling like any child. Fives had to turn his head to hide from the naked love in that man's face.

He wished he had a heartbeat like that.

Theft was, definitely, another matter entirely.

Echo was moving on the field, efficiently making sure the slavers were dead and Rex waved Fives over to help him check the ship.

There was a cargo hold with slaves, about fifteen women of mixed planetary origins. "Your kind of cargo," Rex murmured to Fives through the helmet comm units.

Fives began unlocking the force shields, jokingly, "Ok, ladies, you can all line up to kiss the hero. That would be me." He tapped the cheek of his helmet.

The first woman out was a lithe Togruta woman. She smiled at Fives wickedly, showing her teeth. It wasn't a friendly smile.

He held up his hands in mock surrender. "I'll settle for a handshake or a wave at twenty paces."

She looked at him quizzically. Rex had an odd stance, unsure for a moment, and Fives recalled the Commander.

" _Ai wa shili'n_." Rex told her in greeting.

Fives knew where he had learned it. Ahsoka had taught him some Togruta also though not as much as she had taught Echo and not nearly as much as Rex.

"We'll make sure you get home," Rex was telling the woman.

She considered Rex carefully. "You are not other slavers, then?" Rex shook his head.

"Mercenaries. The man outside hired us. They took his daughter." It was close to the truth.

"Thank you. Currently I live on Ryloth so home is not far." She glanced back to the other women. "We are all from Ryloth or can easily return home from there."

Most of the remaining women were Twi'lek, young and pretty. Fives wondered what the slavers had stolen from them. Some smiled shyly at him, others kept their eyed down and their heads lowered. Some sobbed and Fives decided he didn't really want to know what the slavers had stolen from them.

He didn't a single kiss. So much for being a hero. He wished he had received one; it would mean that at least one of the women had something to give. They had nothing.

"Rex, if you've got this under control," Fives saw he did, the woman giving him their trust, as he spoke, reassuring them they'd be going home. "I'll check the rest of the ship."

There were several more women in some of the cabins and makeshift rooms. Their conditions scared Fives. Most were chained to something in the room and as he opened each door, they glared at him with hatred. Even as he freed him, they jerked away from his hands touching them, disgust and revulsion in their eyes. They did not look friendly at him though he had an electronic key. Some of them had old dark bruises mixed in with new bruises. One had a broken wrist; another had small cuts, new and old, all over her body. One was a Twi'lek girl barely older than Waxer's Numa. Fives had asked one of the other women for help with the sobbing child. She had screamed at his mere appearance and he suddenly realized that slavery was theft. Theft of something so intangible he'd never thought of it before. Slavers were thieves of the worst sort, stealing intangibles. They were the scum of the universe and Fives felt his grey and red armor had a bit more shine than usual to have killed them and freed these women. He glanced at the child, blinking away tears stinging his eyes.  She’d never be free.

In the last cabin a Zeltron with vivid ruby skin was chained to the bed. She had leapt up to attack him, fingernails digging at him, digging at his arm with the blaster. He'd taken a step back, trying to get out of her reach when he saw movement behind him – another woman, dusty rose - from the corner of his eye.

He had no time to think as the chair she swung slammed against his body, but his body reacted as he’d been trained. He took the blow mostly on the side of his arm and not his helmet. There'd be a bruise later. The ruby red woman, chained to the bed, wrapped herself around his arm, her entire weight trying to pull the blaster down. Trying to pull him down to the floor where they could beat him to death. The other woman was pulling the chair back for another swing. He pushed his finger into the lock behind the trigger.

"Hey, I'm here to..." He grabbed at the chair and caught it, his arm straightened. Most women would have struggled with him to keep the chair. Dusty rose woman let go and slammed into his body, pushing him onto the other woman.

The woman on the bottom of the pile grunted as Fives and dusty rose landed on top of her. He felt his elbow hit her side and knew a rib had cracked.

"Sorry," the word popped out.

It didn't stop her though. She started curling her arms around the blaster, limiting his movement, bringing her knees up to push him away.

Dusty rose woman was pulling backwards on his helmet. Fives' neck was twisting back. The helmet was in lock and he knew she couldn't remove it. He was pretty sure she couldn't break his neck either, until the woman on the floor let go of the blaster– it was now solidly between her body and his – and started pushing up on the rim of the helmet below his chin, her legs wrapping around his hips as a fulcrum. Then dusty rose started levering the chair leg under his neck. That was not good.

He rolled to the side, away from the bed. The woman on his back was now beneath him on the floor. The other, her chain too short, was jerked from his body as he had rolled. She grabbed at his blaster again but Fives had it clasped to his chest, his elbows pushing against her. In the brief instant when his body weight has slammed the other woman to the floor, he slipped out the cartridge and keyed the blaster off, tossing it to one side. Captain wouldn't be happy if he'd killed someone not a slaver, even by accident. His gloved hands grabbed the woman's arms around his neck and his strength was sufficient to remove them, but her legs hooked around his waist and her arms fought against his hands.

"I'm here to help." He tried to shout, but it came out with less volume then he intended. They ignored him his words and ruby red swung the chair to come smashing onto his armored chest. Not a problem. The chair cracked in two pieces. Then he saw ruby red's eyes light up and she aimed one of the jagged pieces toward his armpit, where there was no armor. Damn, weren't Zeltons supposed to be able to read your emotion? Couldn't they understand he was here to _free_ them?

He grabbed the chair leg with a hand, but his other arm was captured by the woman beneath him, high up near his neck.

"Do you think we should help?" It was Waxer's voice at the door.

"I think he's doing fine," replied Echo. "He's in the arms of a beautiful woman, his favorite place. He's even on top for once."

"Hmm," grunted Waxer. "Just to let you both know. That's not the way it's done."

Fives felt the dusty rose woman beneath him slowly release her grip. He heard a small choking sob near his ear. The still-chained ruby red woman was glaring at the two men at the door, holding the chair as a shield, but her lower lip quivered. The two men at the door had blasters and the women were now both outnumbered and outgunned.

"If you let him go, he'll release you. Otherwise, you have to keep him and he's expensive to feed and shower." Echo's voice had a grin in it. He and Waxer moved away.

Fives moved off the dusty rose woman, held out his hand to help her up. She ignored his hand and turned to her sister for assistance. Fives noticed bruises on her and realized that she'd have a few more by later that evening. She had a collar on as well, with several links of chain dangling from it. He saw the rest of the chain attached to the bed. Somehow she had broken the chain. He picked up the blaster and slipped the cartridge back in.

"I'm sorry." He said. It had been his fault. He knew better than to enter a room without checking the walls. He released ruby red from her collar, without touching her skin. He didn't want to see the revulsion in her eyes as he had from the other women, didn't want her to jerk away in hate. He dropped the electronic key into ruby red's hands. Warily, she kept her eyes on him while she freed dusty rose from her collar. They were identically dressed, if something as scanty as that could be considered dressed, but in their struggle with him, dusty rose had lost her top. Under his helmet, Fives blushed. He'd seen women before, but she was beautiful. She … undulated and he finally understood what that meant. He gulped. Ruby seemed darkly amused and glanced over her shoulder as she freed her sister.

"Fives, get up here, the bridge of the ship. We've got more trouble." Rex's voice sounded in his helmet.

"Gotta go," he told the women. "I think everyone is gathering just outside." He moved out of the door. The two women followed him to the bridge of the small ship rather than joining the other women. Rex was seated in the co-pilot's seat, facing him were Echo and Waxer. Numa was tightly clinging onto Waxer's hand. Rex saw Fives, the two women behind him. He touched his helmet and spoke, private channel, to Fives. "I didn't say bring anyone."

Fives didn't bother going private. "I didn't bring. They came."

"What do you know about flying a small cargo ship?" asked Rex in open audio to the men.

"I've read instructions," replied Echo. That had been a given.

"Got me beat," said Waxer with a shake of his head, his arm protectively curled around Numa.

Fives laughed. "Me? I saw the cover of the manual Echo read. It wasn't informative."

Rex knocked his fist against the forehead of his helmet

"The women say that there are more slavers. This is just a ship they captured as an auxiliary to their main vessel. The main one is about twice this size and there are about twenty more slavers expected here anytime. We can't wait for our pickup and there'd be too many casualties in a firefight." He sighed. "I guess I'm driving. Echo, you're everything else." Rex hoped he could remember what Ahsoka had tried to teach him about flying. It wouldn't be fun. It wouldn't be pretty. He was reasonably sure they'd survive.

Dusty rose snorted and rolled her eyes. "Di'kut Mando mercenaries!" She strode over to Rex. "Out of my seat." She ordered and he complied.

Ruby red seated herself in the pilot's seat, flicking switches. "Get everyone inside," she instructed. "Let us know when they are all in."

Rex nodded in relief, knowing expertise when he saw it. He and Echo moved out of the small bridge.

Dusty rose turned her face toward Fives, answering his unasked question with an upturned brow. "Who do you think they stole the ship from?"

A slow grin etched itself on Fives' face behind his helmet as he watched the two women prep the ship. He found it interesting that dusty rose hadn't bothered to cover herself from her struggle and his eyes kept drifting to her body. He liked her face too, alert, interested, dark violet eyes. Ruby red had beautiful blue black hair and long, delicate fingers which danced over the console. Fives kept looking at her body because it was tantalizingly hidden.

Dusty rose laughed. "Don't hurt yourself."

"Seeing you two will never hurt," he replied and both women smiled.

Waxer came back, accompanied by Numa. It looked to Fives that she'd never let him out of her sight again. "Everyone's on board. There are some injuries."

Ruby red nodded. "I've opened up med unit for you. I don't know if there's anything there anymore. The slavers may have...”

"Understood," Waxer replied. "We'll do our best with what we have." He left for the med unit. Fives could hear the weeping child in the corridor, a woman's voice talking to her, trying to sooth her.

Fives nodded. "What we've always done," he murmured softly. Ruby red glanced at him as he spoke.

He noticed that they worked together almost silently, as a unit. He worked as part of a unit but their cohesion was more perfect than he'd ever seen. Then he laughed. They were Zeltron; they were reading each other's emotions. If they were sisters, they'd had years to perfect this communication.

"Would you beautiful ladies," he leaned on the chair of dusty rose, "like to go out with me and my brother?"

Ruby red gave a soft laugh. "It's the fighting that's made you want us."

"Maybe," he agreed. "But I'd be interesting in testing that theory in a non-aggressive setting. Wouldn't you?"

Dusty rose turned her head slightly and looked at him from the corner of her eye. "Perhaps," she flicked a few switches and the ship started the jump to hyperspace. "But what if it was only the fighting?"

Echo smiled, though she couldn't see it. "Then we'll arm wrestle."

She laughed and it was like a river of silver in his ears. She flicked a switch and the timbre of the ship changed. Fives was familiar with that vibration, though he'd never before had a window to look out of.

"Wow," said Fives as he leaned forward, stars streaming past the ship like ribbons of light. "I've never seen hyperspace. That's the most fantastic sight I've ever seen."

He heard Echo chuckle in his helmet. "Come on Fives, even I know you're supposed to tell them _they're_ the most fantastic sight you've ever seen."

Both women leaned back then turned to face him. Dusty rose spoke first.

"Why didn't you, "she jerked her head back. "Do that? Your helmet would have maybe knocked me unconscious or at least loosened my grip."

"I didn't want to hurt you." He gestured to the crest of the helmet, turning his head to show her the point. "This can incapacitate, sometimes kill. It wasn't worth the risk." Fives thought for a moment. "You're Zeltrons. Why didn't you know I was trying to free you?"

Dusty rose tilted her head. "The collar's had inhibitors. I could barely understand my sister's emotions. You were a wall."

Echo heard through Fives helmet and laughed at that, even Rex gave a soft chuckle.

Ruby red smiled softly. "Yes, we will go out with you and your brother or brothers." She looked at him oddly and he was reminded of the way the commander used to look at things with the Force. "They are all your brothers, aren't they?

Five removed his helmet and grinned. "Yeah, they are. But I’m the handsomest."

"It could get interesting," smiled dusty rose and Fives heart flew. They _shared_.

\------------------------------

Fives had the door shut again and Echo could hear him with Sula and Saoha. They were laughing and then Fives must have done something unexpected, because Saoha squealed in surprise, then more laughter.

Echo sighed. The first night it had been the four of them. They'd gone to a dance club. It had been enjoyable. They'd come back to the double room laughing and light-heartedly inebriated. Saoha had come to Echo's bed. He'd been surprised, mostly. He'd been bold enough to begin kissing her, shy enough to confess to not many sexual experiences, confident enough to ask her what pleased her the most. She told him. She showed him. She asked what he like the most and he didn't know. She gave him ideas.

But gradually Saoha drifted to Fives and her sister. Echo knew that Sula had gone to Rex. The next day Rex was in an unusually pleasant mood; the sexual tension of about five years worn down by a night with a lovely, loving Sula. Most nights either Sula or Saoha would visit Echo, feeling his need, his want. Fives was pleased to share. He took great joy in sharing.

They shared discussions as well, meals, card games – Sula was a mathematical genius at sabacc often cleaning them all out of the small candies they used as markers. Rex and Saoha would play dejarik, battling intensely until the chronometer marked the next day.

Once, Rex even asked them to assist in an assignment. Of course, it hadn't been difficult or deadly; simply a diversion. "Just go into the bar and be your wonderful, lovely selves," he told them and Fives had argued against it, and then glowered at Rex for days afterwards. In turn, the brothers lived on the ship and provided a protective presence during their trading. Fives kept no secrets from them which meant, in turn, that neither Rex nor Echo had many secrets.

Once, Sula had burst into Echo's cabin, tearfully demanding to know how old he was. He answered her, sadly, knowing what Fives had told her. She had curled up beside him, comforting him and being comforted in turn. "It's not something we think about very often," he'd told her. Most people have an idea of how they'll age and they don't go comparing themselves against longer lived races. Same with us, we don't moan about the fact that we have short life spans. We just live out what we have."

"If you die twice as fast, then you must live twice as much," she told him. "Promise me, Echo, that you will live as much as you can in your time." He promised; then, with a devilish grin, made her laugh and sigh with pleasure.

It was a pleasant interlude. Echo knew Sula and Saoha also visited Rex as frequently as they visited him. He told Fives that he could really tell when one had visited Rex. Fives had stared at him and then laughed. "You too, Echo. Rex said that the other day about you."

But it was only an interlude. The pleasure was only physical and only temporary. Rex picked up another contract and it was time to go. Sula and Saoha volunteered their ship, volunteered to stay in orbit and wait as they had done before. Rex had smiled and kissed them both.

"No. Not this time. It's time for us to move on. Echo, get your gear."

That was when Echo knew. He saw the half-frown cross Five's entire face, his mouth open as if to object. Sula touched Fives’ hand and he turned to look at her, gripped her hand tightly, tears making his eyes moist. Then she turned to Echo and gave him a kiss. Saoha was next.

"Do not forget me." She growled low then her nose crinkled in a grin. "Remember what I have taught you and give that to other women." Echo was tempted to join Fives. Both women moved onto their ship.

Fives looked at Rex, his captain. He looked at Echo, his brother in all things from the beginning. With them he had a shared past.

He looked at Sula and Saoha walking – undulating – toward their ship. He watched Sula, with her ruby body and blue-black hair, gentle words and dancing eyes. He looked at Saoha, lovely dusty rose skin and darker, violet hair, with her spicy temper and laughter of silver. Did he have a future with them?

Echo laughed, joyfully. "Go, Fives. It'll be hard, but we'll manage without you."

Fives looked at his captain with hopeful uncertainty.

Rex smiled. "Go."

Fives smiled, looked at his two lovely women as they entered the ship. He ran to Echo and gave his brother a hug around the shoulders. "I'll miss you, brother."

Echo returned the hug. "I don't think they'll give you the opportunity to miss me."

Then Fives turned to Rex. For a moment he simply looked at his captain, seeing the man who'd taught him so much; lead him in so many ways. He came sharply to attention and saluted him. "Sir, it has been my privilege to know you."

Rex returned the salute. "It has been my honor to have you in my life"

Fives turned and was racing towards the ship.

**4 ½ years after Order 66**

Rex and Echo continued working, a good team. Echo found evidence of other troopers who had deserted. He discovered a few names he knew – Jesse, Scythe, Kix - and marked them for future research. He found evidence of surviving Jedi and searched further.

"Tatooine." Echo declared as he leaned back from the console with satisfaction. "There's a Jedi on Tatooine and I think it’s General Kenobi."

Rex didn't want to see the general. There were too many memories. But perhaps he could ask if Ahsoka survived that night. Just to know that small piece of information might be worth whatever withering glance, whatever harsh words the general could throw at him for his participation in the massacre. So he nodded. "Tatooine, it is."

\------------------------------

Kenobi had changed since Echo had last seen him. Echo supposed they had changed also. Certainly he and Rex had aged in the four years since Order 66. He was only 17 years old, yet looked a hard-beaten 35. He thought Rex looked older.

There was still a sparkle in the general's eyes even though his expression was wary. He invited Rex and Echo into his home, cool in the Tatooine heat, and fixed them tea. Echo thought perhaps it wouldn't be too bad as he dropped his soft pack at the door.

They didn't speak much for a while, knowing that any reminiscence would lead to darker memories. Rex didn't know what to say, Echo enjoyed the tea and Kenobi wondered why they'd come. Rex was tense, Echo relaxed and then the tea was gone.

Kenobi leaned back and touched his fingers to his beard, an old habit they recognized. "So, why are you here?"

Rex shrugged. "Echo wanted to come.” He didn't need to bring up Ahsoka yet. Maybe he would later; nonchalantly, when they were leaving.

That brought a laugh from Echo as he nodded. "I'll have to say Rex is right. It's entirely my fault we're here."

Kenobi hadn't known Echo well, though he did remember the young trooper as quiet and resourceful. Even now, he was wearing his breastplate, painted green, more Mando-style, outlining Rex's blue handprint still there from so long ago. Kenobi seemed to recall than green meant 'duty'. But there were many variations and he wasn't sure.

"How can I be of assistance?"

Echo didn't even look at Rex. "Is Jedi knight Ahsoka Tano still alive?" he asked. "I can't find any information about her, but I also can't find an Imperial death notice."

Rex gasped. He stood, staring at Echo in anger, and left the room through the front door into the noonday heat.

Kenobi's eyebrows rose, "So, it was you?" Echo merely shrugged noncommittally, not sure what was being asked. "She returned to the Temple and was expelled from the Order."

"Expelled? But why?" Echo's face showed his confusion.

"It was discovered that she was pregnant,” and Kenobi laughed. "She informed us she was pregnant. It was a very public announcement. She refused to give the child up; breaking her vow of non-attachment."

"Pregnant?" Echo's voice was soft and then he smiled.

Kenobi was pleased, it seemed that the clone hadn't known, hadn't so much refused her as Ahsoka had implied. He had simply been unaware.

"That is just too wonderful." Then worry overtook his face. "What happened afterwards?"

Kenobi shrugged. "I had heard that she returned to her home planet and her people. The Togruta are a clannish people and Ahsoka had too much individuality to comfortably fit among them, never mind being Force sensitive. But, I think, when a woman is pregnant and has a child, there is a desire to return to her roots and her family, to concentrate on her child rather than the external."

"What about," Echo's voice dropped and he looked away from Kenobi's blue eyes, his lips twisting in shame, "that night?" He fidgeted his hands then looked the general in the eyes. "I was there. In the temple. Killing Jedi no less than another other clone. Every clone commander received that order and then all clone troopers received it seconds later." He watched the general. "It was a programmed order."

Kenobi seemed to accept this with no emotion, skipped over it, not quite absolving the trooper, but not accusing. “Yes, I don’t think there was anything else you could do.” He paused. "By then, Ahsoka was no longer a Jedi. In fact, I suspect that she was mothering an infant by then. She has shut herself off from the Force quite thoroughly. Perhaps in response to being," a dark cloud seemed to drift over Kenobi's face. "Skywalker's student. My sorrow is with her. To be Force sensitive, a Jedi knight and to close yourself off from the Force is like blinding yourself."'

"She'd do that? I remember she loved being filled with it, the Force. She loved being able to jump out of gunships or off cliffs and land as light as a bird." Echo's distant smile showed Kenobi he was remembering.

"To save her child," Kenobi leaned forward, "your child." He touched Echo in the chest. "I think Ahsoka would do anything. Non-attachment doesn't mean that she would not have seen the child or been able to visit, bring life-day gifts – simply that she wouldn't be able to raise the child herself. She gave up her knighthood so she could raise her son."

"A boy?" asked Echo and Kenobi nodded.

"Very distinctly a male Force signature as I recall."

Echo paused. "You've got one thing wrong, though. I'm not the father." He glanced at the door. "Rex is."

"Ah. Well you love her enough to fool me." Kenobi laughed gently. “Is that why he walked out so angrily?”

Echo nodded. "I do love her. And I love my brother just as well. This hurts him more than he'll say. More than he's aware of." He sat back and calculated. "A boy. Right around 4-5 years old now."

"Shili would be the best starting place. The southern tribes, I believe, is where Ahsoka's clan is from." Kenobi gestured toward the door. "If you didn't know, might I assume that he doesn't know?"

"I think that's fair to assume. She left the _Resolute_ about a week after…they. They... uh," Echo turned red and Kenobi gave a chuckle. "Argued" is what Echo settled on.

Kenobi nodded. "I understand. So perhaps even she wasn't aware at the time. Why did you ask, instead of him?"

Echo shook his head. "He wouldn't have asked. Maybe when I first made him come here, he thought about asking. But he would put it off, drop it as not important because he's only a clone and his wants aren't important. Then he'd decide maybe he'd mention it in passing. But he'd change his mind because he wouldn't really want to face her again, the di'kut. And we'd go back and he'd be in a sour mood because he'd have passed up his chance and…gah." Echo looked at the ceiling. "In some ways, having him as Captain was easier than having him as a brother."

Kenobi was shaking, laughing softly. Then it's good he has you to take care of him.

"I don't want to take care of him!" Echo was emphatic. Then he spoke more gently. "That's for Ahsoka to do." He dropped his head then looked up at the general from the corner of his eyes with a smile on his face and his shoulders also shuddered in laughter. "Yeah, brothers and all that. Anyway, we lost her after she returned to the temple. Rex was furious. He still is and that's why he won't ask."

"At himself, you know." Kenobi shifted his gaze into the Force.

"I know. We all, I mean, all of Torrent Company knew within 24 hours of Ahsoka's departure, exactly how infuriated Rex was." Echo smiled wickedly at Kenobi. "He challenged the entire company to one-on-one. Every night, for three and a half weeks, he'd end up beating some trooper into the floor. He had bruises and cuts everywhere; his face, his chest, his hands for weeks; a few cracked ribs, a couple of broken knuckles, loose teeth. None of which he'd do anything more than smear on a streak of bacta gel. Echo lost his smile. "He'd walk out on the battlefield like he was immortal, looking for death."

Kenobi was aware the Rex had been one of the best fighters of Torrent, but didn't think he'd last that long against an entire company. "What happened?"

Echo shrugged. "I got tired of it. I'd been watching and, after several weeks of observing I knew his weak points. I beat him into bloody sorrow, took him back to his bunk, and got him drunk Skywalker provided the alcohol. I let him cry on my shoulder. And that was it."

"As good a cure as any."

"Not a cure. But it brought him to his senses enough that he started seeking cover on the battlefield." Echo's face was angry and his eyes glittered. He'd seen what Rex had done to Ahsoka in the mess. Some of the troopers assumed that since the Captain didn't care, she was fair game for them. Their harassment, tolerated or ignored or unseen by Rex, was why she'd had to leave; otherwise time and proximity would have healed the rift between them.

Echo had beaten his share of men, but it had been the captain's beating that he counted. "I didn't care about the punishment he took from fighting the men, but I decided he had damn well better make it out alive."

"For her?" asked Kenobi softly.

Echo nodded. "For her."

Kenobi sigh, seeing entwined fates in the Force, wondered how they would play out. "May the Force be with you in your search and in your future."

Thank you, general." Echo looked around the small, daub home. "Can I send you anything from Mos Eisley?"

"Tea," said the older man, crinkles appearing around his eyes as he smiled, showing where he would wrinkle in another ten years. "For some reason, you can't get good tea in Anchorhead."

"I remembered you liked tea." Echo pulled a canister of tea from his pack, handing it to the Jedi. Echo had a very good memory and Kenobi gave a delighted cry to see his favorite tea, not easily available on Tatooine.

Rex was stone-faced when the other two came out the building, laughing in old camaraderie.

**4 ½ years after 66**

"I'm not going, Echo. You can look for her by yourself. I'll go back to Saleucami for a visit."

"Who'll be watching my back until I find her?

"You're ARC. You'll be fine."

"I didn't know you for a coward, Captain."

"You'll eat those words, trooper."

"Is that a one-on-one? If so it’s been a long time coming."

"No." *sigh*

"Rex, don't you want to see her again?"

"She hates me."

"She didn't seem to hate you the last time she saw you. She didn't slink off the _Resolute_ without saying goodbye like she could have. You got a face-to-face good-by. Probably not the one she wanted to give you. Probably not the one you wanted. Definitely not the one you deserved. She was angry, but not even as angry as me or Fives can get with you."

"Echo, I as good as raped her."

"It didn't seem that way to me and the other guys in the mess. You were the angry one. You didn't look her in the face and when she touched you, you jerked away like she was poison. What came after was closer to rape. You ignored that. You betrayed your rank by letting them get to your commander."

"I don't want to see her and that's final."

"Because you failed her. Fine. You could at least go and apologize for not doing anything about the harassment after."

"Apologize for WHAT?"

"For not stopping the rumors. For not stopping the harassment. That was closer to rape than anything you ever did."

"What harassment?"

"Don't lie to me. I told you about it. I came in each night and told you there was a one-on-one, usually three or four. Every kriffing night and you'd delegate one of the medics to stand your slot."

"You didn't say it was about her."

"I needed to do that? What did you think it was about? With all those rumors floating around? Or were you so self-involved in mental castigation that you didn't hear anything about what was going on?

"I… I didn't hear anything."

Three fights a night and you didn't bother to check that out?

"I was busy. I had duties."

One of your most important duties was taking care of your of your company and your commander. Did I have to come to you and tell you what they were calling the commander? Spell it out in small words so you'd understand? Captain's woman was the nicest. Clonewhore was not the worst."

"I would have..."

"You didn't. Your behavior in the mess made it obvious about how you thought. You'd had her and then threw her away. Not even quiet, but publicly. Do you remember what you called her?

"Yes. I regretted it then."

"Then you should have said so then. Everyone heard you. They figured she was up for grabs. So they grabbed. There were some men who'd wait for her so they could bump her in the corridor. They'd reach out their hands and touch her where they thought you might have touched her. She was a Jedi and too quick for most of them.

"I didn't know. Echo, I didn't know."

"Do you remember the silent moment on the gunship landing to Akarryz?"

"Yes."

"What did you think that was?"

"Nothing, just the men preparing for landing. "

"It's never that quiet, Rex. It was Touch, and where do you think he got his name? He was behind her. There was a little air bump and he 'fell' forward. His entire body against her back, his free hand coming around to grab her breasts, holding her against him and you were staring right at them! Maybe it was in armor, but it was planned and he didn't move from her for several long seconds. No one said a thing. That was the silence. Everyone looked to you for what you'd do or say. _She_ was looking at you. And you did nothing. No reprimand, no harsh word. Fives beat him to bloody sorrow that night. The next day Touch told me it was worth it and I had my go-round with him.

"I must have had my eyes shut. I … I couldn't look at her by then."

"Was she that disgusting to you, then? Or were you that disgusted with yourself?

"Myself."

"So you were weeping in your mirror and not minding your business. You weren't looking out for your commander or your troops. You had your head so far up your _shebs_ that you had no idea what was going on in your own company."

Rex had no reply for that.

"The night she left, Fives and I, along with three other men, had planned to call you out for one-on-one. We were going to take turns pummeling you into the mat for what you had done to our commander. The general was going to sit our side."

"Why didn't you?" _That would have been the end of him. No one wanted a captain the men didn't trust._

"She asked us not to. She was going and there was no more need to open your eyes to what was happening."

"Why didn't she say anything?"

"She thought you had her back."

"I'll go with you, Echo."

"Why? Just to cover my six? I'm ARC, I don't need you. I won't be your excuse."

"I need to apologize, Echo."

"That's good enough."

**4 ½ years after 66**

"Sister, I have heard there are armored men in the village." Aureki brought the news to Ahsoka as she watched Barin race one of his cousins across the soft grass. He was still baby-chubby but he'd grow into a fine athlete one day. Aureki sat, cross-legged, next to her sister, the soil was warm from the sun and the children, running and chasing each other.

"Then I must go." Ahsoka knew the day would come when stormtroopers would come to Shili; when she'd have to leave. For now, she would leave Barin with Aureki and her family; until she found a place for them both to come live with her.

"Ne-ah, sister. These are not the stormtroopers you have spoken of. There are only two of them and they are Mando, not in the white armor. But they are said to look the same, as you have described save one is said to have blonde hair." Aureki picked up a stem of grass and whistled through it. "When I heard that, I came to you immediately. I knew you would want to know."

"I think," Ahsoka absently watched her son. "I think I will go see these Mando men." Her family would watch Barin, as she had so often watched her sisters' children. They would take care of him if this was some trap. They would raise him if she could not.

"I could go, sister," Aureki said. "I am no one to them. No one to recognize, but I have seen the vids and would know them." She touched her sister's arm softly. "If they are the ones who destroyed the Jedi temple, then perhaps they wish to destroy you now."

"Your bravery astounds me, but you must remain ta-harr. You must give Barin a home. I will go and make my decisions there."

Aureki tilted her head slightly and blew a different note on the grass stem. "For what purpose do you go see them? Old hurts and words of anger? Revenge for a temple that exiled you?"

"I'm not sure, Aureki." Ahsoka said as she stood and brushed her hunter's pants with her hands. "I don't think I'll know until I do see them; until they see me."

Aureki nodded. "Go hunting with an open heart. Tomorrow there will be meal for two more to share. If they do not come," she paused, inspecting her sister, "then you can take the extra I fix when you star watch."

Ahsoka nodded, knowing that if they did not come with her, she would no longer have an interest in the stars.

Echo, sitting at the outdoor table, saw her coming into the village in a hunter's easy pace. Her feet were bare, touching the ground of Shili like the other Togruta. She was wearing comfortable-looking pants of a muted brown-green color, a sleeveless shirt and one of the loose white jackets which everyone on the planet seemed to be wearing.

He could only watch her. She was Ahsoka, but more so than when she'd been younger. She seemed distilled into her essence, her essential being. She had grace and maturity in her face, acceptance and wisdom and love. Echo ached, wishing for a second, he could lie; wishing he hadn't made Rex come with him.

Her eyes caught sight of him sitting still at the small inn's single table simply watching her and she smiled, her eyes crinkling like General Kenobi's had done. He felt light at her smile and grinned back, standing at her approach.

"Echo," she didn't slow down but simply ran into his arms, hugging him, almost knocking him over. Only his strength saved them from a tumble to the ground. He laughed and had his arms around her, her face in the curve of his neck. She wasn't his commander anymore. He held her tightly and gave her a kiss on her lips. She kissed back. He'd never had a sweeter kiss.

"It is so good to see you." She laughed with sparkling eyes.

"It's much better to see you. Me, I see me every day, sometimes in duplicate." He joked.

She turned, ordered something from the innkeeper and then simply sat, enjoying the presence of Echo's company. They talked; he asked about her son. It was almost an hour before Rex was even mentioned. Echo saw her face suddenly become sad and he knew he'd been right to bring Rex.

"How is Rex?" she asked. "What happened when Order 66 was given?"

Echo gave a pained look, it had been several years and he had yet to come to terms with what had happened, with what he'd been ordered to do. He didn't think he'd ever come to terms with what he'd actually done.

"We followed our orders, Ahsoka. That's what we were bred and trained to do and those were programmed orders. I don't think we had any choice. We followed those orders." Echo felt as ashamed as he had the night he had been looking out a window from the Jedi temple, contemplating the stars and wondering if he would turn into one if he took his blaster to his head.

"We followed those orders and those orders broke us." Her hands reached for his and held them tightly. He ran his thumb on the smoothness of her skin.

"Rex saved me and Fives and Jester. The morning after that night we put on our armor and walked onto a troop transport out of Coruscant. No one questioned us." He gave a short laugh. "You don't question two troopers and two ARCs with blasters and attitude if you want to keep living. We just kept doing that for a day. By the time we reached the Outer Rim, we'd gotten rid of helmet identifiers. We painted our armor and hired ourselves out as bodyguards. Jester's a farmer, now. On Saleucami with another deserter while Fives," Echo gave a grin, "is married to two Zeltron sisters we rescued from slavers and they are all three ecstatically happy."

She had laughed at that, it fit Fives.

"Where is Rex now?"

"Upstairs."

Her eyes went wide and her fingers clutched the table. In spite of Aureki's news, she had expected the name of some Outer Rim planet. She didn't want a confrontation. She didn't want to hear words and recriminations; his or hers. She wanted ... Her eyes closed.

"He doesn't know about your son." Echo said softly. "That's not my information to give him." He looked at her, saw her tense face and touched her cheek lightly with his fingertips then let his hand cup her face. She bent her face into his hard-calloused hand. "He's harder than he's ever been but that's just because..."

She spoke with him, "because he hurts." She nodded; Echo's hand fell from her. Her own hands released the table.

"Oh, Echo, I thought I was finish with him. In my heart, I said he was dead even though I knew it wasn't true, simply so I didn't have to take him into account in my life. So I could make decisions. So my life could go on."

She looked into his eyes, golden-brown, like Rex's eyes, like Barin's eyes. Like the eyes of the hundreds of men she'd lead and fought beside. Men bred for war, men bred for loyalty.

"What will I do?" She asked softly.

Echo gave her a soft smile. "That depends on what you want. What you'll fight for." He took her hands in his and set them to his face. "I'm here in case he breaks your heart again. I won't just watch this time, I will beat him to a bloody pulp and kick him off-world. I may not be what you want, but I'm here in case you need me." His eyes were tired and shiny. "But I don't think you'll settle for me." He set her hand down. "I think you'll go upstairs and confront Rex. Remind him he loves you."

Ahsoka set her hand over Echo's hand. "Thank you, Echo." She rose and kissed him softly. Thank you for everything." He handed her the room lock key.

Rex was lying on the bed when he heard the door open. "Any info, Echo? Are we going to be staying around here for a while?"

"I think Echo got the information he needed."

Rex froze. It was her voice. He turned his head and she was standing there, more perfect than he remembered. Her lekku were longer; her akul tooth headdress had far more teeth. She was no longer a lanky kid; she was a woman of twenty one. She shut the door behind her. He could stand this. He had seen her, she was alive and he would stand anything she might say to him.

Rex shivered and shut his eyes then opened them facing the ceiling. He was closing on twice her age now and he felt older than that. He could hear her move closer but she said nothing. He was prepared for her to hit him. He deserved it after what Echo had said. She'd trusted him and he had let her down. He would let her anger make bruises in his flesh. He'd lie there to his death if she demanded that.

She lay in bed next to him and, without thinking; his arm came around to support her shoulders, her head. Her hand rested on his chest as she faced him.

"I..." Rex was at a loss for words; then he began, "I followed the orders."

"I know. Echo told me what happened, but it was no surprise."

"Where were you? I looked for you in the temple." He turned his head away from her. "I was actually going to rescue you." He flushed. It sounded silly, now, after so much death and so many years; after what Echo had told him.

"I was here, on Shili."

"Oh." Rex didn't think about that, simply glad she hadn't seen the horrors of the massacre. "Did he tell you about Fives and Jester?" She laughed. It was ease to his soul and he smiled. She could still laugh. "I guess he has. Can you imagine Fives with two wives? Zeltron no less!"

She looked at him carefully, inspecting his face closely.

"Rex, have you laughed since I have last seen you?"

He thought about it. "I don't think so. There were some good moments, but no. I don't think I've laughed." He looked at her. It was easy to see she had laugh, had smiled, and had loved. It was so very easy to see that she had loved.

He turned his body a bit toward her. Softly, he kissed her forehead. "I supposed you're married."

"No, although I recently received a proposal I am considering."

"Mmm." Rex murmured with a small nod. "He'd be a lucky man."

"He's aware of that. And I would be a lucky woman to marry him." She replied as her hand came up to his face. He took her hand in his and kissed her fingers then placed it back on his chest.

"Does that mean that you don't want me to kiss you?" she asked.

"It means that you shouldn't kiss me, no matter how much I want you to. Not if you're considering marrying someone."

She gave him a smirk, so familiar from years past that his heart twisted. He smiled and raised an eyebrow. That smirk had always meant trouble.

"You do know, my dear Rex, that Togruta usually marry multiple mates. A Shili family isn't complete without two or three wives and just as many husbands."

He smiled. "What if he doesn't want to share you?"

"I think it would be more appropriate to say, what if you don't want to share me."

His response was unexpected. He turned his face, but she caught the glimpse of unshed tears. "Ahsoka, please don't tease me."

"What can I do, Rex?" She was suddenly serious. "I don't know if you want me. Don't know how much you are willing to forgive what I said that day in the mess. I don't know how much I'm willing to forgive what came after. I don't even know why you're here. I have no idea what is between us anymore."

He faced her, took a deep breath, exhaled. "I love you. I haven't seen you in five years and yet I see you every night, every morning. I hear your voice every day. Not an hour goes by I don't think of you. Perhaps a memory or maybe something you might enjoy." He dropped his head, ashamed. "I was sheb-headed and didn't know what came after our argument in the mess." He looked into her eyes. "I would have done something, believe that. Please." She nodded and he continued, "Your padawan braid fell apart long ago from me holding it. I put the beads on durasteel wire." He tugged the neck of his shirt down to show her the beads lying against his neck. "There hasn't been a single day that I haven't yelled at myself for chasing you away. Not a single day that I wouldn't give up, just to have you back in my life."

Ahsoka sighed deeply. "I love you. Every day I wonder what you're doing at that certain moment. I haven't opened myself to the Force since the night the Jedi died, but I could always feel you with my heart. I always knew you were alive." She rose up to look at his face, saw his contented smile and those honey-brown eyes. She brought her face closer to his, kissing his lips and nuzzling his face with hers.

"I have been very lonely without you, Rex. Please. Make love to me; bring us together. Tell me you will stay."

"I will stay if you will have me. I will stay with you until I die." A look of sorrow crossed his face; he'd wasted so much of his limited time, would have wasted more if not for Echo. He touched her face gently with his fingers.

"How did I live without you for these five years?" He kissed her, his lips caressing hers. She laughed for joy and kissed him back, running her fingers into his shirt to draw shivers from him. He slid his hands under her top and released her breasts. They were larger, less perfect, than when she'd been sixteen. He tossed her top toward a chair, missed and didn't care. His thumbs slid into her pants and pulled them down. Her figure was more womanly than it had been. He enjoyed her movement; she atop and controlling him.

They were lying, relaxed on the bed and Rex drew his fingers over her belly. Her muscles were still tight, she was a hunter, but there were a series of odd, silvery lines low on her belly.

"Ahsoka," he asked, "Are these scars?"

"Yes."

"What happened? They're sort of parallel then radiating out." He had a good eye for scars. He knew so many of them from the war, from his brothers. But he didn't know these. "I'll kill the man who did this to you, or make you a rug out of that animal's pelt."

She chuckled, a woman's laugh rather than a girl's giggle, and he liked that very much.

"You did those, Rex."

He frowned at her and she kissed his face.

"Those are childbirth lines, from your son."

Rex froze, his fingers on her began to tremble and he turned pale. Slowly, he shook his head.

"No, Ahsoka. Please. No." he whispered. His face twisted and those unshed tears of earlier began to fall.

She tilted her head as she watched him, touched her hand to his cheek. "Yes, Rex. Your son."

He turned his face away from her touch and covered her fingers with one hand. "You don't know what I've done."

She smiled softly. "I know one thing which you've done."

"Don't," he snarled at her, jerked away, then sucked in whatever other angry words he'd been about to say. "Ahsoka, you don't know what I've done," he repeated. "You don't know…"

"Then tell me." She put her hand back to his face and drew him closer to her until he could feel her breath on his lips.

He stared at her face, her eyes for an eternity; memorizing them. After he told her, she'd turn from him and he'd never see her again. She'd take his son… _his_ son … away from his influence and that would be good. He didn't deserve a child. He had blood on his hands. He'd been born that way.

"In the Jedi tower...” he began and watched her eyes close in remembered pain. She'd been affected, even though not a Jedi. "I followed the general, had his back." He let lose a noise between a chuckle and a sob. "He didn't need anyone for his back where we went."

Ahsoka gave a soft answering mew of anguish, beginning to understand.

"We went up the stairs, to the upper level, where the council room was." His voice was ice. Rex had to keep it ice; otherwise he'd never be able to speak.

Her shoulders were shaking and her head had dropped to her chest. She knew what he had found there. Still, though, her hand was on his cheek, her other hand covering her own lips in horror.

"There was no council in session though I'd been told that's why we were going there. That's where the younglings went to hide. Skywalker knew that, we didn't. He was a Jedi so they answered to him, they came to him." He was silent as tears fell to her hand on his cheek. Rex didn't think he'd be able to get through the next part. He grimaced, forced himself to talk.

"I started to ask what to do with them, thinking we'd be taking them somewhere else. Before I could even begin to ask, he'd killed them. Jedi quick." He felt her shudder, reached out his hand to touch her, brought it back without making contact. He had blood, so much innocent blood on his hands. He didn't want to contaminate her, contaminate his child.

"Body bags, Rex. That's what he said in answer to a question I hadn't even asked. He turned to me and his eyes were red and his face demonic and I started to raise my blaster at him. He didn't use the Force on me or even raise his light saber. 'Orders, Captain. Follow your orders.' Then he was into the next room."

Rex looked up to the ceiling. "I turned to my men." He shut his eyes, as if by doing so he could block the visions from his mind. "'Kill everything'. I ordered them. 'If it’s alive now, it better be dead when we leave." He noticed that his voice shook, though it hadn't when he'd given that order. His chest shook as the sobs racked his body. "…better be dead…" he repeated. For a moment, his voice was normal, as though conversing about the weather. "It was the most pivotal moment in Republic history and I let it happen." He let his head drop backwards, eyes closed.

"Ahsoka, please go." he cried. "Take my son and leave and don't ever see me again."

She put her other hand on his face and he grabbed at her wrists - to make her release him or to keep her there, he didn't know. Her face was covered with tears. "They were people, children you knew, Ahsoka. And I killed them."

"No." Her voice was firm in spite of her tears.

"Please Ahsoka. How can I hold my son and not think of those children? How can I raise my son when I'm...?”

"What happened at the temple was not your fault."

He opened his mouth to protest, but she put her fingers on his lips. "Yes, you participated. Yes, you gave terrible orders." She touched her lips to his. "Echo says they were programmed orders, something you are required to carry out. And the very next day, you ran from that atrocity you had committed. Can you tell me that you don't regret it?" Her forehead was against his, her nose touching his, her breath on his lips.

"Every day, I wished I'd died or tried harder to kill the general. I don't have nightmares often, but when I do, it's the children in that room." His breathing started to even out.

"Have you done anything similar since then?" she asked.

He jerked back. "No!"

"Then what happened is not a normal part of you. You were ordered, Captain." Her use of his rank reminded him of the years of training and drills at Kamino; years of war in which ‘captain’ felt more comfortable and familiar than ‘Rex’.

Rex leaned back, considering this. Her face was close to his, her tears still damp on her cheeks. He rubbed the tears from his face with his palm. Hesitantly, he reached to her face to dry those tears with his fingers.

"I'm scared, Ahsoka," he said as he touched her tears. "I’m scared that because I was at the temple, my own child will be forfeit to some similar horror. Because I didn't have a child, didn't know I had a son, I could manage to live normally. I didn't touch children, Ahsoka. I didn't hold a baby born to a brother. We rescued some children from slavers and I made sure not to touch any of them. I let Echo and Fives take care of them. I felt like I'd contaminate them with evil."

"Barin won't permit that. Your son loves touching and being hugged and held and carried." Ahsoka laid her face into his neck.

"Barin." Rex said softly. He nodded. "It's a good name."

"Perhaps you can let him initiate touching you. Perhaps being there for him is the price you'll pay for what you have done. Will you try that? Will you come with me and meet your son?

Slowly, Rex nodded.

**\---------------------------**

Echo had waited downstairs, watching people walk by. They looked at him as well, so obviously a stranger. He was happy to see Ahsoka and Rex coming down the stairs holding hands. Her flush and his laugher at something she said made him realize what they'd been doing. Not that it had been hard to guess. He gave a wistful sigh. He almost wished that Rex had been in angry, thoughtless mode and she'd come down alone, her eyes shiny with tears that he could wipe away.

They sat at the table with him. Rex's first words were "Echo, did you know I have a son?" Then he laughed. "Of course you knew, didn't you?"

Echo nodded, wondering how much harder this would become for him. He wondered at Rex's easy acceptance of a son, then noticed the red-rimmed eyes. It hadn't been easy for Rex, but he was willing to try for Ahsoka's sake. Echo grimaced, looking at his drink as though it was bitter. Rex had everything he wanted. Echo had given it to him, had pulled him like a stubborn bantha into this meeting. If he'd been a little more selfish ... If he'd loved her a little less ... He jerked himself back to the now at Rex's words to Ahsoka.

Rex had turned to Ahsoka, "Then we'll get married."

"No." she said softly. "I told you I had another proposal I was considering and I must speak to him first."

Rex stiffened then nodded. "If he can share you, I can. Where have I been for five years? Stubbornly ignoring you."

Echo frowned. He'd brought her Rex and she'd consider someone else? He suddenly wished he'd researched more quickly, gotten here before this other person. What had she said? ' _So my life could go on.'_ He sighed, her life had gone on.

Ahsoka nodded. "If he chooses, he will be the father of my next child."

Rex nodded easily to that. He wasn't sure he'd make a good father, wasn't sure he could manage being near a child, touching that innocence. "I'll need practice with Barin. I've got years to catch up with him." Suddenly he started with an odd look on his face. "Children don't break easily, do they?" he asked with his voice soft as he remembered those broken bodies in the tower.

"Very easily" said Echo, remembering the tiny fragility of Cut's child in his big hands, the bodies he had seen in the tower. He was still frowning over Ahsoka's choice.

"Not at all," said Ahsoka, remembering Barin's rough and tumble play with his older cousins.

Echo and Ahsoka looked at each other and laughed at each other's response, at the incongruity they'd just given Rex.

Rex suddenly knew who'd proposed, suddenly knew why Ahsoka would grant Echo first husband privileges. He loved Ahsoka with all his heart and mind and body. Rex realized that he'd been sheb-headed in another way as well. Now he looked at Echo, observed and remembered; realized that Echo had loved Ahsoka almost as long as he had. That love had been hidden in the daily repetition of duty on the _Resolute_ , in the duty of battle, in the duty of service to the commander.

It had been Echo who'd looked for her, found her and out-stubborned Rex to bring him here for her. All while Rex wallowed in self-pity. It had been Echo who'd fought for her on the _Resolute_ while he ignored what had been going on. Echo who'd made him go to that good-bye meeting when he didn't want to see her.

Echo, who'd found her and been willing to give her up to Rex, loved her no less than he loved his brother. Rex's breath caught at that kind of love, that devotion. He was humbled as he'd never been by anyone's fists.

"Ahsoka," he said gently, looking at his brother with a soft smile. "Put him out of his misery and tell him who will be first husband."

Ahsoka leaned forward, took Echo's hands and laid them against her face with a smile and glistening eyes. "Echo, you proposed earlier today and I will accept. Shili marriages are plural; two to three wives and the same number of husbands is considered optimal. My sister would be interested in being co-wife, and you will both meet her tomorrow, but if not, then I can manage being only wife to two wonderful brothers as you." She paused, seeing the doubtful look in his eyes. "This is not _settling_ for you, Echo. This is not a reward for covering my back all these years. This is love for you. Yes, I love Rex, but I love you no less. This is because, now that you are back in my life, I cannot imagine living my life without you. Can you accept that?"

Echo's brain was trying to think but not doing a very good job. Fortunately, his heart had practiced this for years. "Yes, Ahsoka. Yes to anything. Yes to everything." He looked into her eyes and smiled. "I love you." He gave her a lop-side half grin. "Otherwise I'd never have brought Rex."

Rex nodded at this. "He had to bring me, Ahsoka. I was being stupid and stubborn."

"Sheb-headed?" she asked with a grin. Then she turned to Echo and kissed his palm, lingering, pressing his fingers into her face. "I will need you when he is being stubborn. We can gang up on him."

Echo knew that she loved him as much as she loved Rex; knew she loved him for his differences. Yes, she loved him for what he had done, but that was simply a reflection of who he was.

Echo, his heart swelling, his hand tingling where she had kissed it, cupped her face with it and drew his thumb over her lips. She kissed it then drew both men up from the chairs.

"Get your belongings; we have a way to travel." She watched them with pride, golden- and dark-haired twins, as they went to get their packs.

**\------------------------------**

They ran, Ahsoka in the lead because she knew the way. Rex and Echo, battle-hardened, kept up easily. She slowed to a walk about a mile from her family's home.

"It wouldn't be right to run into the clanstead. It would imply danger and there's none." She reached out with her hands to take both of theirs, one on each side of her.

"How will I know Barin?" asked Rex nervously. Ahsoka smiled.

"Other than the fact that he has your eyes and your hair and much of your face as well as a lack of lekku? Mmm. That is a quandary."

Echo chortled.

Rex laughed nervously. "OK, I understand."

Ahsoka continued in a softer voice. "You'll think he is the most perfect child in the world."

"I won't." It was a childish shout

Ahsoka sighed, "As well as the most stubborn." She pulled at their hands. "Come on."

"Won't what?" she called out, loud enough to be heard.

The child's voice brightened. "Mama 'Ka." He shouted then came around the series of boulders that marked the boundary of the clanstead. He stopped. Inspecting the two men carefully, he slowly shifted his body side to side, debating whether to run back to Mama 'Ki and hide behind her legs. He decided that it was safe to approach. He came up and took his mother's hand from Rex. Rex felt Ahsoka loosen her grip and he let go. Barin tucked himself between them then picked up Rex's hand in his chubby little fist. Rex shivered, bit his lower lip. Echo caught his eye, nodded softly.

"Won't take a bath."

Rex inspected his son with awe. Already he understood about Ahsoka saying he was the most perfect individual he'd ever seen. He saw the eyes of countless brothers behind those eyes, himself in that face and golden hair. Ahsoka's perfect angles of lips, cheek and chin in the child. He looked and saw the child; separate from his brothers, from Ahsoka, from Rex. He had never thought to fall in love after Ahsoka left the _Resolute_. He was wrong. He looked into those honey-brown eyes and fell in love. Rex watched, listened, memorizing his son.

"Oh. Is that all?" asked Ahsoka. She took a sniff of the air. "Well, perhaps it isn't you. Perhaps the akul are migrating."

The boy laughed quietly. "No akul. It's me. I was hiding from mama 'Ki."

"Really? Where were you hiding?"

"Everywhere!" the boy squealed with delight and raised both feet off the ground. Ahsoka was prepared and Rex was strong. The boy swung high, laughing.

"Are you curious about these men?"

Barin shook his head as he took another leap and swing, giggling.

Rex smiled and let out a chuckle. Ahsoka turned to look at him. He was staring at the boy, grinning with pure joy. He caught her eyes. For the first time in her life, she saw peace there. She knew it wouldn't stay, but it was there for now. Rex laughed, stopped and knelt to one knee in front of the boy.

"I'm Rex. I...”

"You're my da," said the child. Rex nodded, pleased, proud that Ahsoka had told his son about him, at least that much. Barin turned to Echo and stared for a moment. "You're Echo, aren't you?" He wasn't as sure.

Echo's eyes widened. She'd told her son about him? He was just a trooper, one of 144 men in her command. He smiled back. He'd been her _friend_ , then. "Yes, I'm Echo."

Barin inspected them both; touched Rex's face with a dirty finger then took his hand again. "Are you going to live here? With us?"

"Yes."

The answer pleased Barin. "You'll do."

Ahsoka closed her eyes in silent mirth and Echo had his head tucked into her neck as his shoulders jiggled with laughter. Rex merely raised an eyebrow in their direction. He glanced down at his son. The boy looked up at him, smiling widely. Rex couldn't help but smile back.

A Togruta woman was watching them. She was taller than Ahsoka, with white patterns curling from above her eyebrows, becoming parallel lines down the side of her nose. She also wore the plain white jacket, sleeveless shirt and pants.

"Aureki, has he been this difficult all day?

"Ne ah, sister. He was hiding and I only came out every so often to make sure he was hiding someplace in no danger." She fell in step with them, beside Rex. "I got much work done in the meantime."

Rex laughed. "That was a good plan."

"Aureki, these will be my husbands. Echo and Rex."

Rex, watching, caught something of longing in her expressions. He smiled at her, noticing something in the way she moved that was different; hesitancy and a carefulness about how she moved. If he had seen her at a distance, he might have said she was blind but she clearly saw.

""I didn't know I had a son until today." He said as some sort of introduction. "Its … I can't explain it." He laughed. "But I've got years to catch up on."

Aureki smiled widely. "Barin is a joy and a delight." She mock-glared at the boy who simply laughed as he swung between Ahsoka and Rex. "Most of the time."

"Do you have children, Aureki?" asked Echo.

"No. Only Barin." She blushed even though there was sadness in her voice. "I have no husband."

"Aureki is headblind." Ahsoka said, very matter-of-factly. "When she was young she was ill with an infection and she cannot echolocate. Most of the Togruta consider her unmarriageable."

"Hmm," said Rex. "Headblind. You mean like humans?"

Ahsoka smiled. "Exactly like."

Having met his son, Rex understood Aureki's longing for a child. He'd caught that she already considered Barin as her child. Having been a clone with nothing except dreams, wants, wishes buried in training and battles, he understood her longing for someone to hold her, to care about her.

His heart had been full of love for Ahsoka. He thought there'd be no room for anyone else. When he realized what his brother had done and was willing to give up for him. Rex's heart had merely grown to accept that love. He'd met Barin, falling in love again so sharply, it was like a knife thrust. He could love her, his heart could grow.

"Aureki, I'm only going to be second husband. Am I allowed to marry you too?"

"It must be allowed by first wife and first husband." Aureki looked at Ahsoka with the look she never wanted to see again; the look that perhaps Rex and Echo could erase from her life.

"Of course, sister. You are welcome to this marriage." They looked then to Echo.

Echo knew that looked; recognized that longing. He had seen it so many times in his own mirror. Wanting something you thought you could never have. He took her in his arms, nodding.

"Yes, yes." Echo knew Aureki was a kindred soul and already part of Ahsoka and Barin's life. He couldn't take her from them and if they found joy in her, then he could as well. He'd never been a selfish man and there were some things he had learned from Fives. He wiped small tears from her eyes and gave her a soft kiss.

**\------------------------------**

He'd been sitting in the main room, reading, comfortable. The coals were warm and he was wearing the cotton pants of a hunter and nothing more. She'd come quietly into the room, put her hands on his shoulder, slid them down his chest and whispered into his ear. "Come to bed, my husband." He had stood and followed her to her bedroom without thinking. The bed was empty and his heart quickened.

"Ahsoka, you don't have to…." He began.

"I want to, Echo."

"Look, I know that you love Rex."

"And loving Rex means I can't love you?" she asked with wide eyes. "Tonight, Rex will be alone in bed, or watching Barin sleep, or be with Aureki while I am with you. Or did you mean to go through years of marriage and never ..." She smiled and Echo knew she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever known.

"That would have been enough." He admitted as he rubbed his hand over his head. His hair was just long enough to not be military regulation, starting to curl at his ears and the back of his neck. "I didn't think that far ahead. I thought maybe it would be like being on the _Resolute_ again. Being friends and chatting at breakfast. Sparring and laughing. Even in the bad times, covering each other's six." He smiled into her blue eyes. "Knowing you were there. That was always enough."

"Knowing you were there was enough, too. Then, but not any longer." Ahsoka smiled. "It was good. I felt surrounded, protected, by all of you. There was love in some of you, appreciation in all of you." She got a wicked gleam in her eye, "lust in most of you."

Echo's face froze. Ahsoka pushed him to the bed and he absently sat down on its soft surface. She sat next to him, holding his hand, stroking it, bringing it to her lips to kiss. She smiled mischievously as she looked into his eyes.

"It was impossible to be aboard the _Resolute_ and not be aware of what most of the men were thinking, dreaming, wishing, wanting, masturbating."

He blushed, "Ahsoka." He'd been one of those men. As he remembered it, every one of them had been 'most of the men'.

"I got a very interesting lecture from… my master … about the wants and needs and habits of virile young men and battle lust. Instructions. Warnings. Odd bit of information. I went around for weeks afraid of practically saying a word and wondering at what strange creatures men were." She laughed. "In retrospect, I don't think he was the right person to give me that particular lecture."

"Probably not." Echo put his face in one hand. "Oh, no." he groaned, remembering life in the barracks. He remember one time after battle, when he'd seen her down the corridor and, catching up, had put his arm around her slender waist and squeezed with joy that they were both alive. It could have meant a demerit or an official reprimand, but he'd been too full of life-lust - _shereshoy_ , too glad to see she was alive. He'd gotten an odd look from her, but she had smiled, put her arm around him and squeezed back. Fives had been jealous for weeks. Now he wondered at her thoughts for that odd look, what that look had meant.

"I will even admit," she smiled and reached to run her fingers through his hair, gently kissing his cheek, "to occasionally peeping into some of the," she looked for a word, "more individual dreams to understand these strange creatures called ‘men’." She was suddenly solemn. "Including yours my husband."

"Is it possible to die of embarrassment?" he asked the universe in general. He could swear the universe laughed at him.

"I don't think so," she replied to his question. She sat next to him. He could smell the scent of her skin and he inclined his head closer to her. "I particularly liked your dream after the battle at Geonosis II," she said softly.

He blushed, but smiled. It was a dream-memory he had visited often for comfort, for the illusion of love he'd built for himself within it. He'd visited it often during the war; thought it destroyed after Order 66. Saoha had reminded him of its existence.

"That was the first time I realized what love might be like." She smiled. "The Jedi did not discuss love for individuals; love was an all-encompassing compassion for all things. Something remote. To fall in love with Rex, I had to know what individual love was and your fantasy that night was my first touch of it."

He blinked. "Your first touch of love?"

She nodded softly, leaned in and kissed him on the lips. His arms came around her shoulders and he lay back, bringing her onto his chest, kissing her back. It felt right. He loved her. He had loved her for years.

She satisfied his heart and soul the way that Sula and Saoha had not been able to touch. He was happy Saoha had shown him so much. He didn't feel embarrassed or confused as he might have with less experience. There'd been less fumbling on his part than on hers. He had delighted in Ahsoka's moans and soft cries of pleasure.

Echo held her in one arm, the other behind his head. It would be dawn soon and was not worth going to sleep. "What did you learn from others' dreams?" he asked thoughtfully.

She laughed softly and gave him a kiss on his lips. He returned it, the arm behind his head moving to hold her waist, move up to her cheek and caress it.

"Privileged information for you, my love." she told him. She thought a moment. "Rex's fantasies were straightforward sexy. His dreams were very linear. They served the purpose he put them to; usually to quiet his mind and to sort through the day's information. He was very good at understanding people in his dreams and that translated to his waking world. He was very good at picking up subliminal clues." She paused. "For Rex, there was no … lingering, no diversion."

"That's Rex, even his dreams put to work." he laughed softly. "Fives?"

"Oh, he wanted to be a hero all the time; very much a rescue-the-damsel-in-distress hero. Oddly, the damsel in distress was always a part of her own rescue, an equal partner in the endeavor. His dreams had the most humor; some of it very slapstick." She bit her lip slightly. "During bad times during the war, I visited Fives' dreams so often that I felt guilty and asked him if I permission to do so. He was please, exuberant even, to share his dreams."

"Of course." he asked, grinning at the image of his brother's dreams and his sharing. It made perfect sense. He frowned slightly. Fives had kept _that_ a secret? Hadn't bragged about it over Echo? Then he realized that sharing a dream was probably more intimate than they'd been comfortable discussing. "Countdown?"

Ahsoka groaned. "His dreams had the worst puns you can imagine. I would wake up with some atrocious pun ringing in my mind. Some were visual and it would bother me for days until it would come to me."

Echo laughed, remembering a moment past when she had been looking at a wall, then suddenly put her head to her hand and groaned. "Kix?" he asked.

"Slightly kinky in a fun way. Always trying out something new mentally." She grinned. "We'll have to try out some of his 'outdoor escapades'. I really like the idea of making love in a treetop, though in his dream he had wings. But he was very … ahhh … reserved in real life."

Echo raised his eyebrows. "You know about his ...Never mind. That's something I really don't want to know." He thought a moment more and his eyes got sad.

"What about Chopper?" Ahsoka was quiet for a moment.

"Chopper had nightmares most of the time."

Echo nodded. "We all knew that. He got by on less sleep than anyone I've ever met."

Ahsoka was quiet then, when she spoke, her voice was soft. "When Chopper had dreams, they were the gentlest, sweetest dreams of love I've ever known. I'd wake up crying from the beauty of his dreams." She shook her head, her eyes glittering. "He was broken, you know. In ways I don't think anyone can understand."

"We all are, Ahsoka." Echo said softly. "War does not heal people."

She held him a little tighter. Softly she whispered the small charm to heal and quiet minds. "Haruu, haruu."

\------------------------------

Aureki shrieked in excited terror, clutching Rex's shoulders as he dropped from the tallest branches, falling a man's height then catching a branch to slow his descent and landed with a graceful bend of his powerful legs on one of the wider branches of the tree further down. He unclipped the harness and she fell, less gracefully, from his back. Echo was there, behind her, and caught her, turning her around for a quick kiss before picking her up and tossing her bodily back to Rex. Her voice combined indignation, excitement, laughter and a little fear as Rex caught her with one arm and slung her over his shoulder.

"This is not dignified." she roared out in laughter and excitement.

"Dignity's overrated," called out Echo, laughing as he picked up the giggling Barin and a pack. Barin he simply lifted to the next branch to Ahsoka's hands then he pulled himself up with the strength of his arms and legs.

"Your turn, Aureki," Rex smiled and lifted her to the next level of branches. She grabbed branches, clumsily with inexperience, with determination. She'd never be able to do this with grace like her people; she'd never be able to do this with strength like her practiced, warrior husbands. But she could see that one day she'd be able to do this by herself. She laughed as she saw Rex lift himself to a higher branch to sit and wait for her. Not reaching, not helping, simply waiting, and knowing she could do. She was on his branch, her breath coming fast. She grinned at him and stood her knees only slightly shaky. He grinned back, gracefully brought his feet under him and stood, giving her a hug and a kiss. He held the kiss and soon she was breathless for another reason. He took her hand and they walked up the remaining branch to the top of the tree. Barin was already chewing on a strip of meat while Ahsoka and Echo had waited for her and Rex to join the picnic. There were only a few slender branches, too slender to climb, providing shade, between them and the sky. She stood and raised her arms, exhilarated; by the climb, by the vastness of the sky, by the love of her family.

She was headblind and all her life, her people had told her she could not do these things, had looked pityingly on her, had asked her parents to leave her behind, had not permitted her to try. But her husbands, her stubborn, headblind, human husbands, had insisted she learn to climb the tall trees. They had shown her how, but she'd been afraid. So they made a harness and tied her to their strong backs. Rex had taken her to the very top in the blackness of night and lain with her on soft branches, reaching up to show her the stars. Aureki had gasped at their beauty and seeming nearness, reaching out to almost touch them, forgetting the height. Another time, Echo had moved through the branches so dizzyingly fast, and not always upright, her breath could not catch up to her. It had been terrifying and when he'd brought her to the safety of the sacred ground, her knees were weak and her hands shook, but her eyes gleamed. She had looked at her dark-haired husband's smile as he breathed heavily from the exertion.

"Again," she had asked.

She understood now; the fear of heights, the fear of falling, the fear of failure. None of that had been _her_ fear.

"Haruu," she called out in triumph. "Haruu."

\------------------------------

"No!" It was a scream of anguish and agony.

Echo was awake immediately, running for the other room. He hadn't heard that cry in months, not since soon after the slavers, when there'd been children around. He wasn't fast enough and he heard the sound of something break, absently identified it as a door. Behind him, Aureki followed.

"Barin!" The cry ratcheted up in pained terror, beyond what Echo had ever heard.

"Rex! Rex! Wake up!" Ahsoka's voice shouted.

Then he was in the room. Ahsoka turned toward him with questions and worry on her face. Echo ignored her, grabbed Rex from behind, catching him as he flung his fist again at the absent evil but a very present stone wall.

Rex fought him. "Give me back my son!" he shouted, struggling against Echo's arms around him. Echo wrestled him to the floor; it was harder this time than it had been before. Rex was fighting for his son now.

His eyes were open, but Rex didn't see Echo or Ahsoka, only those terrible red eyes and the dying children. That death-filled figure turned toward a boy; half-Togruta, blonde with the brown eyes of his father. "Barin! Run! Run! I'll stop him!" He knew he couldn't stop Skywalker, but if Barin ran maybe he could escape.

Echo knew Rex was back at the temple with Skywalker and the fallen Jedi children. Barin being there was a new development, and Echo cursed himself that he hadn't thought of that. He had thought of telling Ahsoka and Aureki about Rex's nightmares, but figured Rex would do that. Judging from Ahsoka's pale face, Rex hadn't mentioned it.

"It's ok, Rex. Barin's here. He's ok. We're all ok. Come on, Rex, come back. Leave the tower, there's nothing there anymore. Barin's here at home."

Ahsoka joined in with Echo's calls. "Rex. Barin's here. He's fine. Come home, husband."

Rex still struggled and his face twisted in hate. "Don't you touch my son!"

Echo replied, "Hush Rex. Barin's at home. He's ok."

Rex continued to struggle, but not as fiercely. His face twisted as he fought, but the fight wasn't against Echo anymore. Echo knew he was trying to come out of the night terror.

"Echo," he said through clenched teeth, not quite out of the terror but recognizing Echo’s presence, "Where's Barin?"

"Here, my husband." It was Aureki's soft voice just outside the door. Rex froze, his head turning toward the door. Aureki peeped in, noting Rex on the floor, Echo's legs and arms restraining him, slowly letting go of him. Ahsoka at their side, was stroking Rex's face with her hand, her other hand on his arm.

Aureki moved into the doorway, the boy was a large bundle for her. Echo stood to take Barin from her arms. The child was still asleep, but murmured something and curled a little tighter in Echo's arms. Aureki glanced at Echo.

"He was very tired yesterday." She stroked the boy's hair. "Haruu, little one, haruu."

Rex stood, came to inspect his son, but didn't touch him. He looked at Echo, then Aureki. "Thank you."

"I'll put him back to bed. Rex, why don't you tell Ahsoka and Aureki about your nightmares? Don't you think it's about time you did?" Echo looked at Rex who winced.

He looked to Ahsoka. "War doesn't heal people, it breaks them."

"Haruu," she whispered, almost to herself and she placed her hand on Rex's cheek. "Haruu."

"How did war break you, Echo?" Ahsoka's voice was soft.

"My break was pretty standard." He shook his head. "Nothing compared to Rex or Chopper." He took a sip of his tea and released a long breath wondering how to begin. "I don't believe that I'm anything more than an interchangeable clone. That was programmed into us troopers at Kamino. More so than the CS and CC groups. My wants, my needs are secondary to everything else; for years I believed my only needs and wants were air to breath, food and drink, and orders to carry out." He looked into the depths of his tea, sorrowing for his younger self. "I've worked hard, thought things through so many times, that I sometimes think I'm getting over that programming. Then something happens and I realize it’s as powerful as ever." He paused. "The ARC training helped in some ways, like defining 'need' and putting some brakes on unlimited sacrifice. It helped me in balancing my needs versus others demands. But the base foundation was laid down long ago. The war stripped away whatever tiny self-esteem I ever had. I was nothing more than an effective mechanism for blasting droids."

He looked into Ahsoka's eyes. "I'm your man because I can never be my own."

There were tears in her eyes. "Does that mean that marrying me, marrying us, was just duty?"

"No, no!" Echo hugged her. "I love you and I love my brother." He smiled, "I'm coming to love Barin as himself instead of as a part of you and Rex. I've learned to love Aureki." He paused, "but loving you began as duty. As a new clone out of Kamino, I had to give my loyalty somewhere. We were bred with loyalty, but it has to have a focus. Some of us gave it to the GAR, some to our individual captains or commanders or to a particular company or unit. Chopper gave his loyalty to Slick and you saw how that broke him when Slick turned traitor. It took you and Rex close to two years to make him back into a good, solid trooper. I chose to give my loyalty to my commander, to you. Rex also earned my loyalty." Solemnly, he bent his head to her face. "That's what stopped me in the tower. I asked myself if my actions were loyal to my commander and I saw that they were not."

"So part of the reason you found me was you needed a focus for your loyalty? You needed someone to give you orders?" Her voice was soft.

"I found you because of Rex's need for you. I found you because you could make it all right, make me understand. Not to give me orders but to be my compass. Slightly different, don't you think?" Echo watched her carefully. Slowly she nodded and he continued. "Seeing you again when we came to Shili, I knew I would do anything to keep you in my life. I thought it would be hard, because by then I loved you, but I didn't have enough ... me ... to think I deserved you."

"Then what made you say 'yes'"

His lips twisted. "I don't want to tell you because I don't want you to think this was just for duty." He bit his lip and shook his head. "You said, 'I cannot imagine living my life without you'. Yes, it's duty. It's loyalty. That's what made it possible for me to say yes. But it's more than just duty, more than just loyalty. I've loved you, forever, it seems." He made a startling realization. "I love you partially because you give me, me. You always have. You see more to me than just the loyalty; more than duty, or being a trooper, a flesh-droid, a mechanism for destruction and war, a piece of machinery."

He reached for her, his face and body hesitant that she would go, worried that it wasn't enough. "Ahsoka, in your heart, I am greater than I am in my own."

She came into his arms, burying her face into his shoulder. War had broken her husbands, circumstances had broken her sister. She hoped love would help mend them.

 


	3. The Escape

**Five Years after Order 66**

\---------- Planning the Escape ----------

They meet Fives in Corvala, at the docking port. He told them to come and where the ship would be. It was dangerous, but Fives had been insistent. Sula wasn't there but Saoha was, as well as Waxer and Numa. They met inside the ship, Fives and Waxer would not leave it. Too many clones together in public were a danger, an invitation to bounty hunters and Imperials alike.

Echo smiled to see Fives; it had been almost a year since he had gone with Sula and Soaha. He looked ecstatically happy; he looked like a pirate. He had a gold ring in his ear. His hair was a wild mane of waves braided haphazardly with beads and small bells. His small beard was carefully trimmed with the tip of it dyed metallic gold.

"I took some lessons from Jester." he said in answer to Echo's shocked expression. "People look at glittery things, not faces."

Saoha was kindness itself and as erotic as ever. She gave Rex and Echo long full body hugs and deep kisses. She gave the same to Ahsoka, though the kiss wasn't quite as deep and both Rex and Echo's eyebrows rose at Ahsoka's acceptance of the Zeltron greeting. Rex looked at Ahsoka in shocked surprise, Echo at his brother, Fives, and they both grinned –oh so wickedly. Saoha gave Aureki a softer kiss, called her sister, and Echo could see Aureki’s relief.

Fives hugged his brother, delighted to see Echo again. He gave a laugh while he clasped hands with Rex as they slapped each other on the shoulder and he smiled softly in welcoming wonderment at Ahsoka.

"I'm so glad you weren't there," he said as he gave her a hug and soft kiss on the cheek. It wasn't quite the Zeltron greeting Echo expected of Fives, but it was the right greeting between them. Then Fives simply stared at Barin, looking from him to Rex and back again. He took the boy's small hand in a brother's clasp, hand to forearm, and showed him how it was done.

Barin lost all fear and began asking questions. Questions about the ship, and could he drive and why did pirates wear a gold ring and was he a good pirate or a bad pirate. Fives had laughed and taken the boy to the cockpit, locked down the systems, and sat him in the pilot's seat. Barin's eyes had gotten wide and soon the soft sounds of 'zoom, buzz' could be heard. Aureki chuckled softly, gave Fives a soft kiss and sat in the co-pilot's seat to watch over Barin.

Waxer was restrained, a little concerned the effect the Zeltron greetings might have on his daughter, and happy for some new recruits in Boil’s latest business. He was shocked to see Ahsoka, to have a Jedi still alive.

"An ex-Jedi," Ahsoka explained

"I suspect that's like me being an ex-trooper." he said as the corners of his lips twitched then upturned. "The 'ex' being irrelevant." He, also, had stared at Barin then Rex. He hugged his daughter closer to him, whispered something Twi'lek to her. _My beloved daughter._ She had tightly hugged him around the waist.

Fives brought them caf and tea as they all sat at the table. It was crowded and his heart flew to be together, planning again with his brothers. Fives nodded to Waxer who leaned forward, his arms on the table with his fingers interlocked.

"Boil originally stayed in the Imperial Army to cover my desertion," began Waxer. "He covered my running and had planned to get out within a couple of months. But he always sent messages saying he'd gotten new business." Waxer gave a grimace and glanced at the dark surface of his caf. "I know he helped six troopers run, probably more, because those six were from the 212th or were men I knew. Recently though, he sent me another message. In several days the prison transport, Arkayd, will be taking twenty-three clone deserters, back to Kamino for reconditioning."

There was a soft sigh from the group. So many troopers. So few troopers.

Waxer continued. "If we don't come up with a better plan, he's going to set sufficient explosives on the Arkayd for an evacuation. A slow detonation. Then get the prisoners into escape pods. He's hoping that we'll be able to collect the prisoners before the Imperials show up."

"That's not a bad plan with a little help," said Ahsoka.

"Not really a good one, either," returned Rex. "Too haphazard; too dependent on luck and even if it succeeds, they'd know it was an escape and there'd be more Imperial searches and bounty hunters looking for clones."

Fives shrugged. "It's a big galaxy to hide in. We've got room here for that many men. It'll be crowded." He smiled at Saoha and circled his arm around her waist, bending his head to her ear. "We'll need to be fast to pick up, empty and jettison the pods. Twenty-three men is about five pods full. Can you let Boil know to crowd them in and maybe we can manage with just two or three pods?"

"I'll fly. Fives will need help with the pods," Sasha’s voice was sultry. She stroked Fives’ arm, leaning her head against his chest.

"That'll be me assisting Fives," said Waxer. "Unless you want me in armor aboard the Arkayd. Boil can probably substitute me in somewhere."

"Boil can substitute me on board as well," said Rex, his earlier objections still in his mind, but unwilling to let twenty-three brothers go to reconditioning.

Echo shook his head. "Not anymore, Rex. You don't walk like a trooper anymore. None of us do, really. Although Waxer still moves like a scout."

"Paranoia," explained Waxer.

Echo thumbed his lower lip and looked at Ahsoka with concern in his eyes. She understood, gave a soft smile and nodded.

"Boil's plan is decent. It just needs some touches." He looked at Rex. "For instance, the ship must be destroyed. It cannot be salvageable or they'll notice the lack of bodies. It cannot be simply blown up. It must be destroyed completely. Otherwise they will know that the troopers escaped. Right?"

Rex nodded slowly, wondering what his brother was getting at and suspecting a trap.

Echo took a breath. "That means it needs a pilot on it."

"That's me," said Ahsoka softly.

Rex frowned, his lips twisted. He wanted to object. "Something that big, you'll need a co-pilot." He could have smacked himself; that wasn't an objection, it was acquiescence.

"Not if I just input coordinates for a star and hit the hyperdrive." she replied.

Echo turned to Waxer. "How good it Boil with explosives? Can he make the ship blow up in the pattern he wants? Scare out everyone while making them think the prisoners are already dead or not worth rescuing?"

"Boil says that isn't a problem. Standard orders for prison ships changed after Gorman. These days only crew and support are evac'ed." Waxer had a sour look on his face. For a moment the entire cabin was silent.

"Zoom, zap." came Barin's small voice.

"So we have to make sure the troopers are evac'ed out first." Echo picked up after that brief silence of mourning. "That those pod sensors are deactivated so they can't see back at the Arkayd. Then we have to make sure the prisoners get out. Essentially on the other side of the ship. Pick up these pods. Get the men and get out of the system, without being noticed."

"Why use the pods?" asked Numa, her brow wrinkled. "If you going to have a pilot on the ship, then you can move them ship to ship. Can't you?"

They stared and Rex dropped his forehead into his hand, Fives laughed and Echo chuckled as he put his fingers to cover his eyes.

"That's the problem with modifying existing plans. Something obvious gets totally overlooked." Echo knew that would have caught that when they went to the actual planning instead of going over generalities, but he smiled at the girl. "Thank you for noticing that. Saoha, can you land ship to ship with a destroyer about to blow up?"

She shrugged. "I don't have a license for it, if that's what you're asking. I think I can." She grinned. "Sula could do it, she's a better pilot." Her hands went to Fives arms, rubbing his agitation away. "We can manage," she told Fives quietly.

"Hope so," muttered Fives.

"Is there a problem?" Rex asked Fives.

Fives shrugged and Saoha answered. "Not really. Sula's … expecting."

There was a few moments of general joviality—congratulations, backslapping. Then back to the business of rescuing brothers.

\---------- Contact ----------

Ahsoka met Boil in a bar, recognizing him from Waxer's and Numa's perceptions and her own vague memories from Geonosis. He was a sergeant, no longer a scout. She noticed he walked differently from Waxer's perception of sleek grace. Now, combat authority rang in his footsteps. He was older than Numa's perceptions. There were too many lines on his face, too little laughter around his eyes. His hair had fine streaks of grey at the temple; his carefully trimmed mustache was sprinkled with grey.

At first, Boil tried to dissuade the Togruta woman from sitting with him and she left his table with good grace and a soft touch on his hand. She'd been familiar, but this was a bar he frequented often and he sometimes paid a woman for her company. Some of his squad were also in the bar and cat-called good-naturedly.

"Come on, sergeant. You need to lead us." but Boil ignored them after a small, tight smile. They were decent troopers, but he had other problems at the moment. He hadn't heard from Waxer yet. He _needed_ Waxer's assistance with this one. The Arkayd had already re-supplied, and was ready to depart on schedule in one day. He was duty sergeant on it. The perfect place to be, the right time. Twenty-three men! But he needed someone to get the escape pods. He could not think of any other way, anyone else to help.

He looked up in surprise as the bartender delivered him a drink. "It's from the lady," he gestured at the woman, "From Numa, sir." Boil froze and looked at her. He never mentioned Waxer or Numa or Ryloth these days, but there were people from his past who knew.

_"Where's Numa, Boil." Cody had angrily asked one day as Boil walked the perimeter._

_In shocked surprise, Boil had answered him truthfully. "With Waxer."_

_Cody had dropped his head, suddenly no longer angry. He had signed off on Waxer's death notice. "I'm sorry."_

_And Boil had wanted to tell him._

_Boil had cursed his inattentiveness. That had been the last time. You couldn't do this and be inattentive._

He'd have to be careful. He met her eyes and then nodded. A short, curt little nod. She came and sat with him, sat next to him, sat close to him. Smiled softly, genuinely. She _was_ familiar. The men from his squad gave a small cheer turning back to their talk.

"Perhaps we could go somewhere more private and discuss," she paused, gave him a soft kiss on his cheek, "future plans?" She dropped her eyes. "Sadly, I'm only here for one day. My transport leaves tomorrow." For Boil, it was enough of an unplanned code. He was that desperate.

Boil rose from his seat and gave her his hand. Ahsoka went with him, her facial markings disguised. She was flirting, smiling, a lovely woman for the sergeant. His troopers tried to be surreptitious as they gave him thumbs up or winked, but she laughed softly at those little encouragements.

Boil smiled, but only with his lips, as they strolled along the park's pathway. It was restricted to clones of sergeant or above rank; further in, around the lake, it was restricted to captains and commanders.

"This is it for me. I'm done for," he acknowledged. Every time he got someone out, the regulations changed to plug that hole. He was _teaching_ them to be better jailers. The last few times had been deadly close, but he'd been lucky. His luck wouldn't hold and he knew it. Just one more job. If only his luck held for this last job.

They walked casually, his arm around her waist; merely two people attracted to each other. Ahsoka found it disconcerting; physically so much like, yet emotionally so different from both Rex and Echo. She smiled and tucked her head against his shoulder for anyone who might be watching. He had a warm, comfortable Force signature; stronger and more defined for his choices, for what he'd done.

"You're at the end of your endurance, Boil." And he knew, because he hadn't told her his name. "It's almost time for you to go home."

"Yes." He gave her a weary smile. "This is obviously a change, so what's the plan?"

"Modified from yours. You get me near the ship, point it out for me. And I get on."

Boil laugh. "Not that easy."

"How about if you're a Jedi?" she asked softly and his face became thoughtful and he nodded slowly. He felt safer knowing this about her; finally remembering who she was though his brain wondered how she'd gone from an excitable, gangly youngster to a woman with grace and dignity. She had soft lines of laughter around her eyes. He smiled thoughtfully into those eyes, momentarily wondering how her life had gone.

"Then what?" He returned to the business at hand.

"We get the men off, ship to ship. It'll be crowded but doable. To prevent any detection of escape, the ship accidentally goes into hyperdrive and ends up in a star. If you don't know, I'll tell you where to put one of the explosives so the crew believes the hyperdrive has been damaged. If that's reported, they're less likely to think of escape; to try to find us."

He nodded. If they could do it, it was better than his plan. "What about the pilot?" Ship to ship transfer needed a pilot.

"That's me." She grinned.

He chuckled. "Multi-talented, aren't you? I didn't know you flew but seeing as you were Skywalker's padawan..."  She winced in pain and Boil remembered what had happened to all the Jedi.  "I'm sorry."  He was silent for a moment. It was nice to be with someone you trusted. "How's my family?"

"They miss you."

"I've missed them. But there was always more to do." Even to her he would not say aloud what he had done, how many men he had helped run. And, how many had died.

She sighed, understanding his emotion. "You can't save everyone."

He grabbed her in both arms, pressed her against the broad truck of a tree and buried his face into her neck. "I've tried." he whispered. "I tried."

To whoever might be watching, it looked passionate. Ahsoka felt his hot tears on her neck as she enveloped him in her arms around his shoulders.

He showed her the ship, the sergeant showing his girl his authority, to the delight of some of the troopers who hoped they'd make sergeant one day.

He pointed out the exterior where the prisoners would be on the inside of the ship, whispered the locations of security vids, his arm around her, to the delight of the troopers who hadn't thought their stern sergeant much of a ladies' man.

He escorted her out of military access. Some of his men saw her give him a kiss at the gate.

\---------- Prisoners ----------

Ahsoka used the Force, pulled into herself as tightly as possibly, extending no further than the mind of a trooper or two, to enter the ship in the hours of dark and hide. She avoided the surveillance vids Boil had told her about. Once in the Arkayd, she positioned herself to see the prisoners when they were brought on board and meditated while she waited. Her breathing was measured, even and deep. Her eyes were open; observing. Her touch with the Force was passive, simply accepting the still motion, the intangible opposites that were the breath of the Force.

She came out of meditation as the prisoners were marched onto the cargo deck. They were naked, psychologically bereft of the slightest armor. She was glad Waxer had warned them of that, though it had mostly been his paternal concern for Numa. They had clothes on the ship. A flat metal band was on each man's neck; identifiers and trackers. Boil had told her not to worry about those; he'd take care of them. He had paused in his briefing, and then told her how to use the small handheld device to remove them. In case something went wrong and his luck didn't hold.

Ahsoka recognized men from Torrent Company. Jesse was one of the first she saw, his face angry and bitter, his Galactic Republic tattoo now written in recent cuts and old scars. Kix was next, helping an injured man who was pale, limping and holding his side. Several men she didn't recognize followed, one clutching an arm tightly to his chest. They didn't even have bandages and her lips lifted in a snarl at the cruelty. She saw Sketch, from General Kenobi's company, moving slowly, dragging one terribly twisted leg, assisted by Chopper. Her eyes welled as she saw Chopper. He had more scars, but looked no older than the last time she had seen him, more than five years ago. She knew it was because he had looked so old so young. Countdown and Pax were there. She almost gasped to see Commander Cody. He'd been marked as dead in the lists, as KIA by a rogue Jedi. Ahsoka knew why. He had sufficient rank, authority and charisma that his running would have influenced many more clones to run as well.

She saw Cody recognized Boil even in armor, his shoulders tightened and scorn dripped from his expression. She saw Boil jerk back, as though hit by the acid of that scorn.

Ahsoka recognized readiness in their stance, defiance in the set of their faces, a tendril of planning in the Force, a preference to die like this rather than be returned to Kamino.

 _No, no,_ she thought. _Please don't_. She reached out to Cody through the Force.

He stiffened momentarily, recognizing … something he hadn't felt in a long time.

"Gentlemen," he said. "We haven't got all day." He moved towards the ship.

She caught the confusion of the men and breathed relief as they entered the transport without their planned rebellion. She felt confusion in the dock guards as well. They'd _expected_ rebellion, they were prepared for it.  Some of them had anticipated it eagerly.

She moved around the ship, planting nervous suggestions in the minds of the pilots and the Imperial troopers to ensure departure in the event of an emergency. Then she waited, in the small vents near the prisoners. That had been much easier when she'd been smaller, younger. When it had been adventure she thought of most and not lives. While she waited, she sent touches of the Force to Cody, reminding him of Boil, of better times, when they'd been on the same side. They still were, Cody just didn't know it.

She felt one explosion, then another, rock the ship. Boil had planted the first one to cut off access to the portside escape pods forcing the troopers to use only one bank of pods - the ones away from the prison cells. The second explosion had been near the hyperdrive links. There were more, rigged to explode and destroy everything in twenty minutes. In case. Ahsoka appreciated Boil's planning. He was thorough.

Ahsoka moved toward the bridge, Jedi silent, letting men pass her in orderly panic, to the accessible escape pods. The bridge was empty when she got there. Without her suggestions, they probably wouldn't have gone as quickly.

Ahsoka set the coordinates she had memorized for a path directly to a nearby star There wasn't so much as an asteroid in the pathway, nothing to divert the ship, to slow it in any way. If the Imperials ever suspected, they'd never know for certain. She felt through the ship for life. There were only the prisoners, their signatures too close to individually identify, and one warm, comfortable Force signature running toward the cells.

As the other men moved toward escape pods, Boil made his way to the prison cells. He heard the _thocks_ as the pods detached. He tossed aside his Imperial helmet.

"This is a rescue." He said as he reached the cells. "In case you haven't figured that out yet." He opened the force shields. He hoped they'd heard him, understood him, and wouldn’t attack him. Being attacked by the man he was rescuing had happened twice before. He glanced into the cells. A group this big would kill him. "I'm here to get you home." Boil shook his head. That was stupid. Where was home? But the words seemed to work and the men simply stood, waiting for directions.

"Commander." His voice was tight, remembering that scorn, as he gave a quick nod to Cody who acknowledged him.

"Boil, under the circumstances, it’s good to see you." Cody's lips turned up at the corners, it was the barest shadow of a tired smile.

Boil's tired eyes brightened. Before he had family, his loyalty had been to the commander.

"Follow me. We're going to do this, ship to ship, through an emergency hatch culvert portside." He held up a small machine. "Line up first, so I can get your trackers off."

Cody lifted his chin for Boil. The metal strip sluiced through the machine and landed on the deck with a surprisingly musical noise. Cody gestured to the men.

"Do it and let's go."

The prisoners moved with Cody, assisting each other. Quickly and in some form of order, they moved portside in the culvert below the upper deck walkway. Suddenly an emergency hatched popped with a slight hiss and the clang of forged metal as the door dropped to the deck. Suddenly, there were several other men, brothers, helping them.

Cody was brought up short to see Rex. He gave a slow, delighted grin and clasped Rex's hand quickly. "Here men, in here." he called absently.

From the early days of the war, Rex had been his best brother, his confidant, his mirror. Then Rex had deserted and Cody had sworn he'd hunt him to his death. Now Cody was the mirror. "Good to see you, brother." he told Rex.

Rex, unable to speak through his surprised joy, slapped the not-dead-at-all Cody on his shoulders.

"Seven minutes," shouted the ship's com.

Chopper, one of the last men to lose his tracker, heard that voice and halted.

"Commander?" he said softly, his brows drawing low. He saw the ghosts of Echo and Rex. He shook his head sadly, sat and slumped against a corridor wall. Echo's ghost ran over as Chopper curled into a ball for warmth, his arms around his knees, his chin resting gently on one knee, thinking.

"Chopper, what’s wrong?"

"The commander died at the Order." Chopper's voice was raspy. He hadn't used it much in prison. After the first year, they hadn't asked him any questions. "It's just another nightmare." he said so matter-of-factly it sent shivers down Echo's back.

"No, she didn't die. She wasn't there." Echo touched a stiff shoulder.

Chopper didn't object to the ghost's touch. He'd be a ghost soon enough. It was actually kind of nice to know he'd be in good company.

Echo's ghost continued speaking. "She's here to rescue you. Everyone who's here."

"Echo, you're a ghost too." Chopper gave a feeble push with his hand, less at the ghost than at a past of too much pain.

"She'll be disappointed. She's come so far. Come on Chopper, don't make me carry you."

"Six minutes," rang the intercom in her voice. "I'm on my way."

Chopper's eyes got shiny and he wiped at them. He didn't cry in front of others and a ghost counted just as much as a live man. This ghost more than most.

There wasn't much time, but Echo knelt, eye-level to Chopper. "Remember the argument?"

Chopper's lips formed a firm line and he nodded. He'd gone one-on-one for the commander. He'd planned to go one-on-one with Echo and Fives against the captain.

Echo continued. "She was pregnant and the Jedi sent her away. She wasn't there when the Order was given. Nowhere near the temple because she wasn't a Jedi anymore. Me and Rex, we married her."

He could feel Chopper move from tense stillness to interested stillness and Echo continued. "The Togruta count their wealth in family. We have family. Rex has a son. Ahsoka's going to have my child in about six months. She says it's going to be a girl. Can you imagine, Chopper? Me, a father." Even in the circumstances, Echo's thoughts paused in wonder and he got an absent smile on his face. _Him! A father!_

"You let her come here?" Chopper snarled.

Anger was very good, Echo decided, Chopper still cared.  He had never stopped caring.

"I've learned that my wife will have her way. And not just because she used to be a Jedi. Don't you want to find out, Chopper. Everything that's happened since you were captured? We thought you'd died."

"They told me she was dead. You, Rex. Everyone was dead."

"They lied to you, Chopper. They lied to us. They lied to everyone. You know that. Why should this be any different? Come on. Please."

Echo tugged at Chopper who rose slowly to his feet. His eyes held doubt in them, like he expected Echo to vanish. But he moved into the little ship, now full of men pulling on soft clothing. He had trusted Echo alive, why shouldn't he trust Echo's ghost? But it was not until he saw the commander running down the corridor and into the crowded ship that the last bitter dregs of hate and anger finally died inside Chopper.

\---------- Four Views of Escape ----------

Cody noticed the ship was piloted by a cherry-red Zeltron, ready to pop in pregnancy, and a shaggy-headed man who, after a longer look, was identified as a brother, someone vaguely familiar. Another Zeltron woman, pink-lilac in color, was rubbing the pilot's shoulders and breathing in quick puffs. Cody wasn't sure if the Zeltron presence, with their reputation for emotional empathy, was brilliant or stupid or simply coincidence. The pregnancy argued for coincidence.

Boil was leaning against the wall, his eyes closed with a small content smile on his face. Cody owed him an apology – about twenty-three of them. He recognized long hours of work in Boil's ragged, tired face, the dark circles under his eyes. Possibly more. Waxer and Numa were beside him. So, Numa had been with Waxer, it had simply been that Waxer was alive, had run. Cody smiled at that. He like having something to smile about, after so long. He remembered Boil bringing him Waxer's helmet and notification of death to sign three years back. His smile froze. _Boil had been doing this for three years?_ He definitely owed Boil apologies.

The cherry-red Zeltron pilot switched places with the lilac-pink one. For a moment the very pregnant Zeltron leaned against the man and Cody, seeing the tattoo, finally recognized Fives. Fives cradled her in his arms and carried her to a cabin as he called over his shoulder, "Kix, I'll need you. At least for a few minutes."

"I can help if you need someone, Kix." shouted Echo, handing out provisions, though there was dread in his voice.

Cody moved to Rex's side. "Anything I can do?"

Rex gave a cocky grin and handed him a bottle of water. "Pass out supplies and start planning your future."

\------------------------------

Ahsoka moved into the pilot's seat next to Saoha. Chopper quietly moved to sit on the floor next to her. He leaned against her seat, his elbows on his drawn-up knees. A small, bemused smiled played on his lips.

"Chopper." Ahsoka's acknowledged him, dropped a hand to softly brush the broken stubble on his head, to rest on his shoulder. He didn't flinch as he had so often on the _Resolute_. She'd been worried that prison would bring back the old Chopper, the Chopper who'd been broken so badly by the traitor.

"Commander." He replied, taking her hand in his and giving it a soft kiss in the palm. "Thank you." Then he let her hand go.

Ahsoka started in surprise. No, this wasn't the old Chopper at all.

Ahsoka and Saoha cut the first jump close, skimming the bigger ship, staying in its electronic shadow, and going into hyperspace as it went into hyperspace. Something only a Jedi's perfect timing could do. Dangerous, but not as dangerous as being detected. After each jump, they planned to cut power and rest, drifting dead in space to make sure no one followed.

\------------------------------

Kix had never delivered a baby before. He was a combat medic. But he looked at the serious expression on Fives' face. He'd heard Echo's call and nodded at Fives. "I'd like Echo here, too." Fives turned a deadly pale, but he nodded and left the room for a moment.

"You needn't be so nervous," said the woman with a smile. "My baby is a happy child, eager to see the world."

"I hope so, ma'am, he replied. “I hope so. I've just never done this." Soothing words, soothing words. Kix had learned long ago that soothing words sometimes worked better than anything else.

She touched his arm. "I know." He looked at her, saw she was Zeltron and was embarrassed at not realizing that instantly. She was bright red, for _kriff's_ sake. How could he miss that?

Echo came into the cabin, his mouth in a tight line, worried for her. Sula glanced at him, holding out her hand. "Echo. Come hold me. There is no trouble, he is simply inexperienced."

"Is that it, Kix?" Echo said as he sat at the side of the bed, putting his arms around Sula, letting her use his strength to sit up. A contraction hit and she grabbed his arm, leaned into his chest and panted.

"Yes, Echo." Kix replied sourly. "We didn't have too many pregnant women in the GAR." He moved between her legs, gently laid his hand on her belly, covered by the soft material of her gown, and was shocked when it rippled. "I know the theory, at least." Kix admitted. "But it's all theory."

To his surprise, both Echo and the woman chuckled.

"I think," said the woman between her quick breaths, "you just catch."

Echo gave her a quick kiss. "I'm here for you, Sula." Then he turned to Kix. "I guess that makes me the experienced one here. I've help deliver one baby." Echo nuzzled the woman with a smile. "Fives should be here instead of me." He hadn't finished the sentence before Fives opened the door.

"Saoha said you wanted me here." There was fear and concern in his voice.

"Take my place here," Echo commanded as he moved. "There's nothing wrong, Kix just wanted a second opinion." Fives moved behind Sula, supporting her in his arms, against his chest, whispering word of love in her ears.

Kix looked up at Echo. "What the kriff happen at that delivery, Echo?" Kix asked softly.

Echo patted his shoulder. "You don't want to know, Kix. Certainly not at the moment."

"Later, then?"

Echo nodded. "Yeah, when this one is over."

* * *

Echo marveled at the ease of this delivery and the pleased wonderment on Kix's face as he held the newborn girl in his hands. Kix placed the baby against her mother's side while he waited for the cord to stop pulsing. He tied it off, cut it and handed her to her mother. The Zeltron, Kix couldn't remember her name though he'd been hearing it for several hours, reached out for her child. She was held and hugged and supported by Fives. The baby didn't cry and Kix was worried about that. Babies were supposed to cry, to clear out their lungs. The Zeltron woman laughed softly at both Echo and Kix.

"She is Zeltron. She can feel the emotions here and they are good emotions. We do not cry at birth."

Echo slapped Kix on the shoulder. "You seemed to like delivering babies."

"Yeah," nodded Kix with a grin. "It was …" He moved his hands in circles. "It wasn't" His arms jerked and his fingers spread. He smiled, gave up trying to explain. "Yeah."

Echo shrugged as he stood. "I'll introduce you to a doctor where we're going. Maybe he'll take you on as an apprentice."

\-----------------------------

Saoha's breath caught at the emotions on the tiny ship. She was amazed emotions that big and wide and deep and intense could be contained in so small a place.

From some men she caught the pain of injury. That one had broken ribs, a fracture femur, and some internal injuries. This one had an old injury that still pained him, a twisted leg where bone rubbed against bone. Here she caught new bruises, a midnight pummeling for disobedience. Another one, they'd put mocking scars over his tattoos, over his beliefs.

She wanted to cry, but the joy was too much also. They were united in their joy of escape, some in joy of people they'd thought dead, old friendships to revive. She caught wariness; they knew they weren't free yet. Readiness, they'd do what they needed to do. Trust, trust so pure and deep she'd never felt anything like it. Trust so sharp and defined she'd carry it with her to the grave.

She wanted to go to each of them, hold them and hug them, let them know that she cared for them. She wanted to bed them and give them healing in place of their pain, smiles in place of their anger and fears. Fives had told her to be prepared and she had thought she was. But the emotions ... the curious sweetness of her sister's new baby, Fives' fatherly prides, Echo's love, Rex's faith, lifting them ... She was glad of Ahsoka's steady presence beside her; soft contented joy bubbling in her as well. Saoha took a breath and steadied herself against Ahsoka's control.

"Rex," she called softly to not disturb the emotional ambiance. Her voice was too soft. She breathed out again, "Rex." He came to her side. "That man has internal injuries."

Rex nodded. "Kix knows, but there's nothing we can do for him right now. What else?"

"That man," she softly gestured. "He is hungry and cannot eat the provisions."

"Broken jaw, maybe?" asked Rex as he looked at the trooper, scraping at a ration bar with a fingernail to suck the slivers carefully into his mouth. He touched her shoulder, giving her his steadying strength. "I'll take care of it. Galley set up the same as it used to be?" She nodded and Rex left, to return a few minutes later with a cup of warm soup and straw for the man who accepted it gratefully.

 


	4. Saleucami

**Sketch**

Sketch looked around the small ship with a soft smile and memorized what he would draw. He'd had nothing in prison and had to make do with his fingers in the dust, quickly erasing when any of the guards had come by. He hoped he'd get drawing materials soon enough, now he was gathering inspiration. The general air of the small ship was contentment.

The two women pilots had faces of quiet concentration. He recognized Commander Tano from the 501st. Her eyes were sparkling with pleased accomplishment and she would be one of the first pictures he drew. Captain Rex's face was filled with quiet pride and joy as he spoke with Commander Cody. Cody's face was both amazed and amused by their escape. They had all been prepared to die at the dock, but Cody had not given the command. They'd all walked aboard the Arkayd, trusting him. Sketch wondered what he had trusted in that decisive moment.

Boil, who they'd all thought one of the jailers, was asleep, leaning partially against the bulkhead and partially against Waxer. His hand rested on the head of the young Twi'lek girl pillowed on the armor of his thigh and two of his fingers were clasped in her fist. Even in sleep, his face was tired and wan. Sketch committed the scene to memory. It would be an excellent picture.

A brother who looked like a pirate came out of the cabin with a golden-peach-colored baby in his arms, all grins and pride. A good picture, Sketch noted to himself. He took the baby to the pilots, to Rex and Cody standing together. He paused and then took the baby to Chopper, sitting at Tano's side. Chopper smiled, something he'd never done when they'd been in Slick's squad. Something he'd never done in prison. Sketch knew that would be as good a picture as any he'd ever drawn.

There were so many sights, so many emotions, and so many pictures to draw. Sketch tried to stretch his bad leg. He'd never walk straight on it again; there'd always be the pain. There wasn't much room for him to stretch with so many troopers on board. Still, he managed. Countdown had seen his anxious moves, as he rubbed his leg.

"Just rest it on me, Sketch," he said sleepily and Sketch did.

All of troopers were leaning against the bulkhead or lying on the floor, curled up as tightly as possible, dozing. No one objected when someone accidentally got stepped on. Rex and Waxer had provided clothing and soft canvas shoes, food and water, and blankets. The food and water were mostly gone now, the blankets covered the sleeping or used as pillows.

They'd gone through four jumps of hyperspace; each with a long dead drift. Sketch had had a view of the stars as they jumped hyperspace. He decided he would put that background with the Zeltron co-pilot. Her face was alert, loving when she looked at the pirate, filled with concern and wonderment when she looked at the troopers. She had looked at Sketch, smiled, winked and, when he blushed, lowered her eyes invitingly. He'd enjoyed that little flirting, it made him feel good.

He rubbed his wounded leg. Even straight out, resting on Countdown's hip, it was stiffening and would start hurting if he didn't move it soon. He was glad they never found out he drew. They would have crushed his hands instead.

He felt the vibrations and the ship came out of hyperspace. They drifted dead again. They were clones, used to waiting. Today, they'd wait until death if requested; they'd been rescued from reconditioning. No one asked where they were going. It was better not knowing.

This time, they moved around a planet after the dead drift and began landing preparations. Rex and Cody and Echo moved around, waking the men with a hand on the shoulder or a soft word. Kix, a bemused expression on his face, was back with wounded Kayl, who hadn't moved. Sketch had memorized every nuanced expression, his fingers twitched, ached to be holding a drawing pencil or a brush.

It was early morning planetside when they landed near some farmland and quickly disembarked. Captain Rex had given Commander Tano a long kiss before he went down to the planet. She began prepping the skip for liftoff again. She'd be running decoy, Sketch supposed, One or two more jumps with drifts. The kiss had surprised him, then he realized they were no longer GAR; they hadn't been GAR for years. He smiled, happy for them. There was hope in the galaxy.

Sketch's leg was too painfully stiff and weak. Even with Chopper’s help, he had fallen when he tried to stand, one of the last to leave. The lilac-rose Zeltron was there with Chopper and she helped him too, putting his arm around her shoulders, letting him lean his weight against her. He was too pained and too tired to have any physical reaction to her presence, but that didn't stop the want inside him. He swallowed it down. He'd learned during the flight that she was married to the pirate brother. She and Chopper helped him to a boulder. Chopper went back to Captain Rex to see what he could to do help. She softly began massaging his leg through the material of the cotton workout pants. The heat of her hands soaked into the twisted muscles. It felt good. She seemed to know just where to touch, where to avoid. Her empathy was more than emotional.

"What did they do to you?" she asked with anger in her voice.

He shrugged. "Cut some tendon. Twisted it around until the knee popped and grated, twisted the other way until the ankle popped. Kix wasn't there yet and it healed badly. Clone traitors didn't get medical." He said absently as he breathed the cool morning air, his eyes closed at the pleasure of the moment. He paused. "Your hands feel very good on it."

"Saoha," Sketch opened his eyes as she glanced up to see Rex. "Sula has asked for you."

She turned her eyes on Sketch. "I must go tend to my sister and the baby." Sketch gave her his hand to help her up; he still had strength in his arms. She stood in front of him and cocked her head to one side. She gave him a smile then bent and gave him a soft kiss on his lips. He was too shocked to respond before she ran toward her sister.

Rex sat next to him on the boulder and waited for the bemused smile to disappear from Sketch's face. It took a while. "That's Saoha. She's one of Fives' wives."

"I heard." Sketch's face showed his disappointment. "She's very beautiful. I probably shouldn't have enjoyed the kiss."

Rex saw the disappointment. "She does have delicious kisses." He smiled crookedly at Sketch. "I think she'll come visit you some evening or another."

"Is that appropriate?" Sketch frowned. "I wouldn't want to make trouble."

Rex shrugged. "They're Zeltron and Fives fits right in with them. It’s probably Saoha's idea, but if not I'm sure Fives would be encouraging her."

Sketch wasn't sure he liked that idea. "You mean that he's making her...”

Rex laughed. "No. It's difficult to make Saoha do something she'd rather not. Almost impossible. Simply, right now she's overwhelmed with emotions. There are twenty-three new brothers and they're all in emotional turmoil right now. Pain, confusion, disbelief, wonderment. Saoha responds to those emotions. She can feel them. She's made to heal them. Most Zeltrons tend to avoid pain, depression and all that nasty stuff we troopers are prone to. Not Saoha."

Sketch still had a soft frown on his face. Rex put a hand to his shoulder. "No matter what happens or doesn't happen, knowing Saoha is worth it. If you have doubts, talk them over with her or me or Fives or Echo." Sketch nodded sharply, trooper to captain, knowing he'd talk to Echo if he had questions.

Rex pointed toward a set of buildings. "That's the farm. The building on the left is the barn, where some of the brothers will be staying. Probably you and Kayl. Whoever Kix decides, it will be the med unit. Because of the number of people, we'll be operating under camp rules for a while. Some of us are going to be roughing it in the surrounding forest." He laughed. "Not that it’s rough at all. Its spring, the weather is almost perfect. Virtually none of the insect life has pincers or claws. None is poisonous. There aren't even mosquitoes, just lightning bugs. We'll be taking time for everyone. You'll meet family."

The way he said 'family' implied so much more to Sketch than merely brothers and he asked.

Rex nodded. "Brothers and wives and some children. Not a lot, but family." He paused. "Family," he repeated softly with a smile, then continued. "Most of the men are walking down to the farmhouse but there's you and Kayl that can't make it. Cut's bringing up a speeder lift for you and him, Sula and the baby. Sula said she could walk, but Kix, Echo and Fives insisted she ride." Rex chuckled. "She could probably convince Echo and Fives to let her walk, but not Kix. It's _his_ first baby."

Sketch had laughed at that.

"Kix says he's already looked at your leg and there's nothing to be done for it." Rex's voice was curiously gentle.

Sketch nodded. "Not without extensive surgery and a bacta tank." They both knew the improbability of that. "My dancing days are done for." He shrugged and gave Rex a smile. "Lucky for me, I never enjoyed dancing."

Rex was hesitant. "We'll be interviewing people later. Among other things we'll be evaluating emotional and psychological fitness, asking what happened after Order 66, the circumstances of their desertion. I know that I could have used a good debrief after I deserted, just to get that out of my head."

Sketch nodded. "That'll be good. There are some guys..." Sketch shook his head and exhaled. "Let’s just say I'd rather be me with my twisted leg than them with their twisted emotions."

Rex patted Sketch's shoulder. "You always had your art as a debrief."

Sketch nodded slightly. "Though not much for the last three years."

They heard the speeder coming up the hill. Most of the men had already started their walk down to the farmhouse. Sketch could seem some men already there, milling about.

Sketch met Cut who gave him a smile and a brother's handshake; then, with Rex, helped him onto the speeder lift. Sketch had bit his lip against the pain.

"I'll try to make it as smooth as possible, but it'll still be a bumpy ride, so hang on tight." advised Cut as Rex and Kix lifted Kayl onto the lift. He appeared in worse condition that he had earlier.

"He's not looking good," said Sketch, as he reached out a strong arm to help gently set and steady Kayl on the lift.

"I know that, Sketch." Kix's voice was angry and dark. Then he let out a breath. "Sorry." Sketch understood.

"We have a nurse down at the barn, Kix." said Cut. "She got some supplies you don't have and she's set up a sterile area." Kix nodded with a grim expression, then turned to help Rex with Sula. Saoha climbed into the back with Sketch and Kayl. She smiled at Sketch, but concentrated on Kayl, lay next to him, touching him, holding him, and letting her emotions sink into him. Sketch hoped that somewhere, deep in his mind, Kayl could feel them. Somewhere, deep in his mind, he wanted to live.

Sula, climbed into the drive seat with Cut, still arguing. "Really, Kix. I can walk. Rex, tell him..."

Rex raised his hands in surrender. "When it comes to the health of the crew, medic outranks everyone." Kix smiled absently at Rex's words, carefully handing Sula the beautiful, little baby he had delivered.

It wasn't as bad a ride as it could have been. At the farmhouse, Echo and Chopper helped Sketch off the lift and into the house, setting him on a bench at the table. Sula handed the baby to Saoha who, noticing her sister's uncharacteristic pallor, called for help. Several brothers were immediately at her side. One carefully lifted Sula from the seat. At Saoha's direction, he took her into the house where the pink Twi'lek woman sent him upstairs to put her in a bed. Saoha followed with the baby. Before going into the house, she turned to another man.

"Please send Fives here."

"I don't know which one is Fives, ma'am." he answered softly, not expecting her to be able to describe him sufficiently different from all the other brothers.

Saoha smiled. "The pirate."

He got a big smile. "Yes, ma'am." Then he was off at a trooper's run.

"Will she be ok?" Sketch, sitting at the table, asked Saoha. He wished he could help.

"Yes. She is just overtired. It isn't every day that one rescues troopers, has a baby, makes a hyperspace jump like that, feels emotions so intense..." Tears came to Saoha's eyes. Sketch nodded as he gently touched her arm. She looked at him, at his hand, with a soft smile and leaned into his strength, just a little. "Thank you."

"It has been an exciting day." He licked his lower lip and glanced down, suddenly shy. "May I see..." But she was holding the baby for his view. She looked so tiny and delicate and perfect.

"Hold her." said Saoha. "Here, move your arms so one is beneath her and the other curls around her."

"I can't..." Sketch shook his head. "She's tiny. I'll break her."

Both Saoha and the Twi'lek laughed. Saoha, feeling his fear, sat next to him and helped him hold the baby for a short time before she took the baby upstairs even as Fives entered the house with a worried look on his face.

"She was tired, Fives." said the Twi'lek woman. "Childbirth is no easy task even at the best of times."

"Thanks, Suu." Fives still took the stairs three at a time.

Suu asked Sketch to help peel and chop vegetables. "With so many people, it will be soup and bread for dinner tonight. Better also, I think, for settling everyone after excitement."

Sketch nodded. "Soup's good. Not too rich either." He didn’t say that anything would be better than prison.

Cut had come in from taking Kayl and Kix to the barn and putting the speeder lift up. "Internal bleeding," he told Suu and Sketch. "They're operating on Kayl."

Sketch frowned. It wouldn't be right for anyone to die at this point. They'd all made freedom. "I don't know if Kix can manage that."

"Saria's there too. She was a surgical nurse for almost ten years." said Suu as she took away the bowl of vegetables Sketch had done and brought him another bowl, this time unpeeled topatos.

Fives came down the stairs with a smile on his face and sat with Sketch and Cut as Suu set three glass of some amber liquid in front of them. "Sula's asleep," he told them. "It’s been a rough day for her. Saoha is with her and the baby. I've been told that Zeltron babies need to be held and talked to a lot. She's beautiful, isn't she?"

Sketch nodded, thinking all three of them were beautiful.

"All babies need that, Fives." said Suu softly. She ran her fingers in his hair. "First Jester, now you. Cut had better not show up with beads in his hair." She looked menacingly at her husband who finished his drink, laughed, kissed her heartily, then left.

Sketch's ears perked and he looked up at Suu. "Jester's here?" He smiled softly. "We came out of Kamino together."

Fives stood and gave his shoulder an encouraging pat. "I'll send him in if I see him." He left also. Sketch glanced down at the glass. Tentatively, he took a sip. It was juice, sweet and cold. He finished it in two gulps.

Sketch continued peeling and chopping. Helping to prepare the food, however menial, was good. It had purpose. After Fives left, Suu asked him if warmth was good for his leg.

"Yes, ma'am. It hurts terribly at times and warm is good for it." He didn't tell her they had made sure he didn't have 'warm' in prison. She handed him a towel, almost too hot to touch and he laid it on his thigh and trembling knee with a soft sigh.

"With so much cooking, the kitchen is hot and the towels are right next to the stove. Let me know when that one gets cool and I'll give you another."

A boy came in with short, brown-stripped lekku, his brown eyes bright with excitement, about twelve years old. "They're uncles, mom!" His voice was loud and Suu hushed him.

"Sleeping woman upstairs, Jek. Voice down," she admonished softly and he dropped his head a little guiltily. Then Suu smiled. "Get the vegetables from Sketch and bring them in to me. That was the last for a while, Sketch. Thank you."

"Hi, I'm Jek." His voice was quieter. "Are you going to be sleeping in the forest?"

"I'm Sketch and, at the moment, I don't know where I'll be sleeping."

"I'll give you my bed. It's upstairs and has a great view of the fields."

Sketch smiled at the generosity. "I don't think I can make the stairs, but thank you for offering."

Jek glanced under the table and Sketch grimaced. He didn't like to think of how his leg looked to a civilian, a young boy. Twisted, crooked. The foot, all wrong. At least he had clothes to hide the twisted muscles of his leg.

"Jek!" Suu's voice was sharp and reprimanding.

"No, it's not..." began Sketch.

"I'm sorry," said Jek quietly as he came back up from looking. He bit his lip. Sketch turned his head, not wanting to see pity in the eyes of a boy. Jek took the peeled vegetables. He came back from the kitchen with another warm towel and Sketch traded it for the cooled one.

Jek moved across the room and came back with a box. He pulled out some books, flimsi and other supplies. "School." he said to Sketch with a face showing his opinion of that. "Dad said that I have to finish three pages to mom's satisfaction before I can help again. I'm running errands, showing people the eopies and nunas, taking them to where we've prepared camp areas and fire pits." He noticed Sketch's interest in the pack of colored pencils. Softly, he pushed them toward the man. He was an uncle, like Uncle Jester, like Uncles Rex and Echo and Fives. Someone like dad.

Sketch's hands gently opened the box. The pencils were new, barely used, most still had factory-fine points on them. He gestured tentatively toward a flimsi sheet. "May I?" he asked softly and Jek handed him some blank sheets.

Sketch smiled softly. "Thank you." He drew his first picture in 3 years.

He was free. Truly and really free.

 

**A/N -Jesse's story is a bit darker. Please do not read if depiction of rape disturbs you.**

**Jesse**

Jesse thought he recognized the planet as he walked down to the buildings. When he saw a pink Twi'lek woman in the doorway of a farmhouse, he knew. Saleucami, where Grievous had escaped them. She glanced at him among the men walking toward her, did a double take, stared a moment, at his scars he knew. She grinned at him as she handed him a golden fruit.

"Welcome back." she said, as she touched his arm softly. He almost jerked back, it was so painful after so long in prison. She caught his flinch and moved her hand.

"Sorry," he mumbled, his head down. The fruit had a ripe, sweet smell and his mouth watered. He'd had one, long ago, on this same planet, given to him by this same woman. It had been one of the most delicious things he'd ever tasted. "Thank you, ma'am."

"You called me 'Suu' last time." She paused. "I am sorry. I hope you are better when you decide to leave." She turned to another man, giving him fresh fruit. The bowl was almost empty, but Jesse saw another bowl sitting on the bench even as she grabbed it, continuing to pass out the fruit.

_Decide? Him? Decide when to leave? He'd leave when they told him to go._

He glanced up, saw Rex and Rex grinned at him, came over and slapped his shoulder. The other men moved away, giving them privacy. They knew Jesse from prison, they knew Rex as one of their rescuers. Suu saw Rex, smiled and took the empty bowls back inside.

"Look familiar?" Jesse noticed that Rex smiled a lot more than he had during the wars. He noticed a closeness between Rex and the commander that had only been hinted at, until their argument in the mess hall and her subsequent departure. He noticed a closeness with ARC-trained Echo.

Rex was relaxed, happy. _Not at all like him_.

Jesse didn't have much reason to smile, to be happy. He glanced down at the ground. He was not headed for Kamino and reconditioning. He had a sweet fruit in his hands. He had the chance now, to atone for what he'd done. Those were reasons enough. He looked back at Rex with a small smile.

"Yes, sir. when you took that sniper hit mid-chest." He gestured at the door where the woman had gone. "She was protective of her kids and wasn't keen on helping, but she did. She must have a big heart to do this as well."

Rex nodded. "She had more than her children to protect. Remember what her daughter said when she came for the ball - 'You look like my dad'? Her husband is a clone."

Jesse frowned. "You knew and didn't report him." Rules were rules for a reason.

Rex shrugged. "I guess my treason was beginning early. It's worked out. Cut's a good man, can have my back any time." He looked at the scars overlaid on Jesse's tattoo. "What happened?"

Jesse's lips curled bitterly. "Torture."

Rex merely looked, waiting. Jesse sighed, sat on the bench by the porch, rolling the fruit gently from hand to hand.

"I had body detail after Order 66. Upper levels." He sighed, his lips twisted in pain. "Do you know what we found?"

Rex nodded. "Children." He said softly as he sat next to Jesse. "I ran because I was up there when it happened."

Jesse's expression changed, he seemed to be holding back tears and he pulled at his face with one hand. "I'm sorry. It must have been..."

"Yes." Rex said, nothing more, cutting off that line of discussion.

"I didn't run then. But the Empire was squeezing more and more out of everything." Jesse reached up to his head and face, but didn't touch his face. "It wasn't a republic and my face declared my ideology different. It was my squad," Jesse's voice cracked in pain. "I made sergeant and they gave me a squad. It was my own squad that held me down and made the first cuts half a year later." Jesse felt bitter tears sting his eyes. Rex's hand came to his shoulder, a rough, comforting grip.

"I ran that night, bloody-faced. It was soon after a battle where we were ordered to fire on unarmed civilians. Soon after rape became a means of information extraction. And I objected." He looked at Rex and touched his fingers to his face. "But it's hard to run, to be unidentified, with a tattoo like this, with scars like this, and they caught me. They enjoyed cutting me while I was imprisoned. Every so often, just taking me out and putting a few more cuts in the outlines of my tattoo. No questions, not trying to get information. Just giving pain because they were bored." Jesse dropped his head. "You might as well drop me off in wild space and forget about me. I'm a danger to this whole group."

"No more than Cody," stated Rex as he gripped and lightly shook Jesse's shoulder. "No more than me or Ahsoka or Chopper or any brother with tattoos. We're all identifiable."

Jesse shook his head. "In a different way. You're identifiable as clones, but there are a lot of places where you can be just a man. Where clones aren't well-known. One look at me and people know that I believe in the Republic and the Rights of Sentience."

"Right of Sentience didn't apply to us, Jesse."

"I know. But they existed! People had rights guaranteed to them. Citizenship, freedom from slavery, fair trial. We were supposed to defend those rights. I was proud to do that." He shook his head. "They weren't perfect. Rule of law did not stretch evenly from one side of the galaxy to the other. But it was there; a template, a guideline, a promise." Jesse turned to Rex with tears. "Children are not subject to the death penalty under any circumstance. But they're dead. Citizens have the right of assembly without fear of being murdered. But they were murdered. Rape as...Rape!" He wiped his eyes with one hand. "That was the worse, Rex."

He looked at Rex and saw him nod, then Jesse continued.

"She was barely a woman, maybe 20 or 22 standard years. Pretty. She had blue eyes like the sky on Kamino, dark brown hair like strong caf. A fighting woman; she broke Ansel's arm when they captured her, kicked Chon in the balls after he took his turn. And she had a temper, you could tell. We asked her questions. She didn't answer." Jesse was silent.

"You took your turn, didn't you Jesse?" Rex said softly.

Jesse nodded, just a slight shift of his head, his chin quivered. He spoke woodenly and his eyes were bleak as he softly spoke. "Yeah. I took my turn. She'd stopped fighting by then. She was crying. Not loud like she expected help. Just real quit, tears running down her face." Jesse turned his head away from Rex. "It wasn't what I expected. I didn't enjoy it."

Rex bowed his head, but had no idea what to say to that. Jesse hadn't raped her out of anger or lust or to terrorize or get information. He'd raped her out of curiosity, raped her because the others had, raped her because he wanted to know what it was like to have a woman.

"She raised her hand up, real soft. I was ready if she tried to attack me but she just touched my tattoo, traced a bit of it." Jesse looked at Rex. "That was the best part, her soft touch on my face. That was almost right." Again, Jesse dropped his head in shame. "She looked in my eyes and said, 'You have no right to this,'. I jumped up like she'd bit me and ran out of the room, out of the barracks. I couldn't get far enough away from that truth."

Jesse held the fruit to his noise, smelling it instead of the memory of blood. "I came back five or six hours later, meaning to get her out of there somehow. She was dead." His lips twisted bitterly, angrily. "I would have got her out of there." His face was red, his eyes blinking back tears. _I could have loved her, could have let her go and had her memory for the rest of my life._ "I lodged an official complaint, told my squad that wasn't going to happen again. A day later, they hold me down and cut my tattoo. I was headed to med when I decided to run."

They sat in silence. There was movement around them; a girl with a toddler, a group of men moving towards the forest, someone going into the house. Jesse didn't care to notice them as the tears ran down his face. After a while, he wiped his eyes dry.

"Do you regret the tattoo?" asked Rex after another period of silence, curious.

"No!" Jesse's voice was forceful. "No." he repeated. He'd messed up, he'd raped a woman, taken away her autonomy, taken away everything from her. He hadn't had much chance in prison, but he swore that he'd never mess up like that again.

He looked down at the fruit in his hand and ran his thumb along the edge. The peel separated and a sweet, red juice covered Jesse's thumb. He put it to his mouth and softly sucked the juice from his skin. Finished with the juice from his thumb, he put the fruit to his mouth and sucked from the opening in the peel.

They sat in companionable silent as Jesse finished the fruit, flipping it inside out to rip out the flesh with his teeth. Then he carefully licked every bit of its juice from his fingers. He kept hold of the peel. He'd been told they were under camp rules and that meant trash was contained. He hadn't been assigned to a group yet, Rex would probably know.

He breathed a deep breath. There was a soft breeze coming from the west. He leaned back against the railings of the porch. He didn't want to discuss this anymore, didn't want to remember it, relive it.

"Ahsoka?" mused Jesse. "Getting familiar with the commander again, are you?" There was no malice in his voice, only curiosity and a desire to turn the talk away from what he'd done.

Rex laughed. "More familiar than you know, Jesse." Rex looked at the ground, ashamed for a moment. "Thanks for going one-on-one for the commander, back on the _Resolute_."

Jesse acknowledged it. "They were wrong to do that to her. It was tearing up the company." He looked at Rex. "You know, there were some of us going to call you out."

"I've been told." Rex was silent. "I'm glad it worked out the way it did." He glanced up into Jesse's stern, scarred face with a grin. "I'm married to her."

Rex chortled for a few minutes at Jesse's shocked expression, shaking his head. Then he continued. "Only second husband though, Echo outranks me." That brought a snort of almost-laughter from Jesse. "But it’s a good life." He paused, a soft look came over his face. "You'll meet my son."

Jesse understood why he smiled.

"Wish I had that. A woman, family. Someone ..." his hands moved, reached. _A dead woman reached back, reached up to caress his tattoo in love, not hatred._ Then his head dropped and he touched his face, speaking bitterly. "No woman's going to look at this face."

"You'd be surprised, Jesse." Rex's voice was low and quiet. "Different people look for different things. Some women don't concern themselves with a face when they can have someone's heart."

**Kayl**

Kayl struggled against the gravity which pulled him down. He had always liked jetpack and anti-gravity practice. He enjoyed moving swiftly and silently through air, through space. But now he was terrified of that blackness, that emptiness. Above him he could see the stars, bright points of light, of joy. He reached for them, though he knew they were too high, too far, millions of light years, millions of parsecs away from him. Still he reached. He could hear singing.

Angels. Beautiful women with wings and soft love on their faces. He looked up and saw one. Her hair was the darkness of space and her eyes the brightness of starlight. She was reaching for him and he reached up with hope and took her hand in his. He prayed he wouldn't be too heavy for her to lift. He'd let go if that happened.

She smiled, barely touched his fingers and he soared.

 _Hello, Kayl._ Her voice was music and she looked up at him. He smiled back at her, put his arm around her waist. He felt good, alive, his senses tingling with newness. That could only mean one thing.

"Am I dead?" He remembered the beating, though he'd forgotten what he'd said. Or maybe it was something he'd done. He remembered moving in agony, feeling the blood leaking into his body, leaning against Kix as they moved into the dock. They'd planned to fight the prison guards, though he'd be no use there. He remembered nothing later, so he had to be dead.

 _No. We've worked very hard to prevent that._ She smiled. _And if you decide to die now, I will, personally, be very angry with you. My sister and I have been here for several hours trying to reach you._

He laughed. "I will try not to disappoint you, Angel."

_"Sula. My name is Sula."_

They were laying down now, him facing up and she by his side, though he didn't remember how they'd done that. His eyes were closed, but he could feel her hand on his face, the radiance of her against his skin. He wanted to roll onto his side, to see her, to feel her body against his, to feel that warmth of the living. He tried to roll, but something restrained him. Frowning he pulled against it.

 _Don't_. It came through him in a flurry of colors and emotions; concern, worry. He stopped trying to release himself.

"Closer?" he tried to ask, but his voice was muffled. Still, he felt her warmth against his skin as she moved closer, touching him with her body.

He was satisfied with that and smiled. Throughout his body, even inside himself, he could feel her. She was content, but concerned.

"Talk to me," he asked. "Please tell me what happened." Again, there were no words that he could make, that he could hear. He could feel her assent before she began speaking. He heard through both his body and his ears.

_You escaped._

He waited, but she only beamed with sweet satisfaction.

"And?" That was actually a word, more of a moan actually, that he heard from come from his voice.

_Isn't that enough?_

Curiosity coursed through his body like blood through his veins, then collapsed upon itself.

"Yeah," he murmured softly. "Think so." He was tired now, exhausted, hurting everywhere. He could feel the air, hear the sounds of people moving and smell antiseptic and blood. He had the odd suspicion it was his blood.

 _Yes,_ whispered her voice in his ear. _You almost died._

"Won't." he moaned softly. A promise to her.

"Kayl?" That was Kix's voice. "Kayl, can you hear me."

"Kix." Kayl murmured.

"He hears you," It was another voice, the musical voice. The voice of the angel.

He must have smiled on his face as well as in his heart. Kix laughed softly and touched Kayl's face.

"Do you want to know about the surgery? The escape?"

Kayl wanted…

"He wants to know the cost," whispered the angel's voice. "In terms of death."

"No one, Kayl. Boil was one of us and rescued us with brothers' help. You'll have to recuperate to hear the whole story. I'm sure you'll get twenty different versions while you're recuperating."

Again, the angel spoke for him with gentle laughter in that musical voice. "He will heal, Kix. He promises."

He felt Kix's touch on his face, then clasp his hand. Kayl could hear Kix move, do something else. The warmth of his angel didn't move away from him.

"Can I sleep?" he asked. Barely a whisper from his lips, but a strong question from his heart.

_Yes, Kayl. I will be here when you wake._

**Kix**

Kix moved out of the makeshift sterile area of the barn rolling the tight muscles of his neck and shoulders. Saria had done a great job with Kayl and he'd been impressed with her grim determination to save him, though he suspected it had been the Zeltron women who'd made the difference. You couldn't make a man survive; he had to want to live. Kix knew that from long experience on the battlefield and in prison.

Kayl's last memories would have been of prison and he'd been fighting depression since the death of his captain there. But Kix had seen a smile on Kayl's face and heard his barely audible promise to live.

Surgery had taken longer than he had expected, but the other men with injuries were waiting for him outside the barn. They'd been patient, understanding Kayl's life-threatening urgency.

Kaver's broken arm had been tended to. A white, makeshift sling held the arm snugly against his chest. Kix asked him who had done it.

"Brother, name of Jester, from here. He said it was just for support while you worked on Kayl, sir."

Kix spoke while he checked out the arm with gentle fingers. "No need to 'sir' anyone here. Get in the habit of saying something else. Both 'ok' and 'alright' are good. 'Yeah' can sometimes be considered a bit rude but is mostly casual."

The sling looked good and had been cross-tied around the torso for stabilization, but easy enough to remove for Kix's inspection. This guy had some first aid practice and Kix decided he would make sure to meet Jester and express his thanks.

Kix undid the sling, carefully supporting Kaver's arm. The bone in the arm had not punctured the skin and the swelling had gone down from when Kix had last seen it. Kix sighed happily; it was something he didn't have to do. He redid the sling, wrapping instead of cross-tying. "Pain medication for you and I'll want to see your arm every day. You'll have to do some sort of therapy so permanent stiffness doesn't set in. That can wait for the moment. Make sure you step careful, your balance will be a little off while the arm is restrained. All of you, there'll be a meeting later this evening where they'll be going over things. I've been told that you wounded," he looked at them all, "will be in my squad staying here at the barn. I'll show you your racks later. Right now, I really don't want Kayl disturbed."

Kaver smiled. "We saw those women go in. The pink one flirted with us a little before she left. If Kamino'd had medical help like that, I would have fought to go back." He laughed softly. Kamino had been a death sentence. "Maybe." Kaver shrugged his uninjured shoulder.

Kix understood it as relief from the tension they'd all been under. He nodded.

He moved to Dare, the trooper with a broken jaw, gently touching the side of his face. It was still swollen, a little too warm, and Kix didn't like that. A broken jaw could be difficult; possible complications included a long time healing, numbness, nerve damage to the teeth, loss of feeling, TMJ and assorted other problems. The trooper winced at the touch.

"Have you eaten?" asked Kix. The trooper nodded, showing Kix a bowl and pantomimed sipping with the straw he produced. "It's not healing well and I would prefer to re-set the jaw for better alignment. We're going to sedate you good for that. Afterwards, your jaw will be tied up. Saria and I think you'll do fine with a simple bandage instead of wires, but that may change depending on what we see during surgery. How we do." He gave a small half-grin. "Liquid diet, of course. Your food will be lot of liquids. Maybe – just maybe, you'll manage soft food in small bites after a week. I'll talk to them about keeping your calories up; don't want you to turn to skin and bone. You'll sleep on your back." The trooper nodded and Kix continued. "Are you actively in pain?"

The trooper thought a moment then shook his head, slowly, once. A modicum of pain, then, Kix decided, easily controlled by one of the milder pain meds. "I'll give you something anyway. Dissolvable. Mostly for a good night's sleep. Probably some antibiotics also, against infection. It feels a little warm back here next to your molars. Nothing, though, until we re-set it." Dare nodded.

Riposte was next, his body black and blue. Kix merely shook his head. "As long as there are no internal injuries, it's just pain meds and monitoring for you."

"I figured that, si…" he stopped himself and started again. "I figured that, Kix. I already took one."

"Where'd you get it?" Kix's brows pulled down.

"The woman serving soup, she offered when she saw me moving stiffly."

Kix nodded. "Was it worth it, Riposte?" he asked. Riposte had attacked one of the guards and broke his ribs and wrist before he'd been pulled off. He'd been planning on killing him.

"Yesterday? No." They'd been prisoners yesterday. "Today? Now? " A slow grin pulled at the swollen lips and his eyes crinkled in a smile. "Kriff, yeah."

Kix laugh.

"Kix, go eat dinner." Riposte lightly pushed at his shoulder. "It’s soup and bread which doesn't sound too spectacular but it is the best meal you'll have ever tasted." Riposte smiled and held up a jade-colored bowl and metal spoon. "Make sure you keep your bowl and spoon. It's yours from now on, but if you lose it, you have to find it before you get to eat and you'll go to the end of the line."

Now that Riposte had mentioned it, Kix did feel amazingly hungry.

"Alright. You men have some free time. Relax a bit if that's all you can manage. Make sure to walk enough to not get stiff, Riposte. Kaver, no jogging that arm. It's pretty stable, but don't push it. You all be expected to help the farmstead, so wander around if you want. Ask questions. Dare, don't wander out of eyesight. I'll be back shortly and we'll see if Saria's finished post-op with Kayl."

Kix moved off toward the house, hoping the hungry men had left him something.

There were two men on the porch, both locals from their clothing. As he got closer, he recognized Echo and then, after another glance, Cut. He'd met Cut on landing, but had been too pre-occupied with Kayl to really notice the man. Cut had a relaxed expression that naturally fell into a smile. He must have had a good life since his desertion. Well, it was his farm. He was wiry, not as muscular as the rest of the men, a little thinner. His eyes were observant, watching Kix as he made his way over, watching the group on the yard.

There were troopers in the yard; most sitting, eating, laughing, playing with a Twi'lek toddler, along with a Twi'lek youngling of about thirteen or so. Kix took another look at the child with a frown, and then a bright smile lit his face. Half-Twi'lek and probably half-clone if those brown eyes and dark hair told the story.

Echo smiled at his expression. "That's my boy, Keeli," said Cut with soft pride. The child was trying to climb onto Riven's back, giggling; tumbling onto the grass as Riven turned, playfully trying to grab him. "My daughter, Shaeeah." Cut gestured to the youngling who had one watchful eye on the child. "She's turning into a woman, now." There was a wistful expression on Cut's face. "My other boy, Jek, is inside. Presumably doing schoolwork."

Echo frowned to himself, intent upon the data pad he was making notes on. "How's Kayl?" he asked Kix.

"Doing ok," said Kix and Cut at the same time. Kix looked at Cut through narrow eyes. Cut just laughed.

"The way you walked out of the barn." He explained. "The way you tended the others. The way you're walking here to have dinner. The fact that Saria is still in there with Sula."

"I didn't approve of that," said Kix. "She's too recent from childbirth."

"I'll ask Fives or Saoha to make sure she gets rested. But you saw that Saoha couldn't manage to … well, whatever it was they did." Echo had lines of concentration on his head.

"Save his life," said Kix softly.

Echo made a note in his data pad. "Get some food, Kix. It's in the back, or you can go through the house and see Sketch." Echo frowned again. "Skip Sketch for a while. He and Jester are getting re-acquainted. Get some soup and come back. We can talk about how things are going."

"Your safest option," winked Cut in a loud stage whisper, "is to take your dinner back to the barn via behind the shed."

Echo didn't look up as he smacked Cut in the arm, but he did smile. "I won't bother you too much, Kix. Cody says you've been doing a lot with pretty much nothing and you've been doing great."

Cut laughed. "Rex said it was because you'd been 501st where 'great' was the norm."

Kix grinned, pleased at the accolades from both men, and moved around the house to the back.

There wasn't much of a line anymore and Kix noticed only scraps of crumbs in the breadbaskets. He sighed. The pink Twi'lek woman looked at him as she handed him a bowl of soup and explained about it being his bowl. The soup was thick with vegetables, some noodles, some meat; nothing too rich which most of the men wouldn't be able to tolerate after so long in prison. Simply good, solid food. He closed his eyes as the scent tantalized his nose.

"You were here before, weren't you?"

"Yes, ma'am. With Rex."

She smiled. "Wait here for a moment." She moved into the kitchen, delicious smells in her wake, and returned with some bread, still warm from the oven. It was topped with a small knob of jam that had started to melt from the heat. His mouth watered.

"Rex said you were on the medical team and to make sure you had bread as well as soup. For some reason, the bread goes quickly." She paused, hesitant. "How is the wounded man? Saoha went upstairs to cry because she couldn't reach him, because he seemed a void to her."

"He'll be fine, ma'am."

"Suu," she corrected.

"He'll be fine, Suu. He even smiled." Kix did that himself. "Thank you, Suu. Both for dinner and for providing a place for us until we leave."

"You are family." Her voice was gentle. "I don't know how it could be managed, but you are welcome to stay. Everyone is welcome to stay. Both Cut and I agree on this."

In the face of this gift, Kix could say nothing. He merely nodded and turned before his emotions overcame him.

He didn't go to the porch. He couldn't yet face anyone. It had been too much to take in. Half a day ago, they'd been on a docking bay, naked, hungry, preparing to die as they rebelled against the guards. Anyone who didn't die then would be going to Kamino, which was considered even worse.

Today, they were free and fed, rescued by brothers – his captain, his commander from the war. Now they were moving onward to an unknown future; a future they actually had some margin of control over. A future of some kind of promise.

Kix drew up his knees and bent his head. He hadn't had time before now; his first baby, Kayl's long surgery, checking on the other men. Before that, three years as medic for the prisoners with no supplies; three years of watching men slowly die being able to do nothing.

Now he had the time. Now, he had a moment to himself.

Kix shed great tears of relief and sadness and pain; for both the living and the dead.

**Boil**

Boil lay on his side in the forest with a gentle smile on his lips. The bedroll under him was comfortable. Waxer was watching Numa create a friction fire in the firepit. She wasn't doing anything exactly wrong, but she didn't have the fast tempo yet which was needed to start the fire. Waxer was letting her find the tempo on her own which could be a frustrating exercise, but Numa seemed intent and she was very close.

"You're getting closer, Numa. Be prepared," said Waxer.

"I think this requires four hands," she mumbled back.

"Four is better than two, that's why partners make the best scouts and the best scouts usually have a partner. Ahh, there…"

Numa bent and softly breathed on the tiny tendril of smoke. A few little puffs and the tendril seemed to build and then suddenly vanished.

Boil laughed softly. "It is too wet, Numa. Feel the wood. Something that wet does require four hands or a lot of practice."

"She almost had it, Boil," said Waxer proudly.

"Like a said, a lot of practice." Boil smiled and Numa caught the pride in his voice also. She hadn't seen nerra Boil in a long time and wasn't yet as used to the nuances of his voice and face as she had once been. Nerra Waxer had wanted her to stay with the other wife of Echo and Rex, but she had told him she would not let him greet his brother alone. She would not let Nerra Boil think she did not love him as greatly. When Boil came onto the ship, his eyes had searched for her; she’d seen that. Nerra Waxer hadn't wanted her to see the naked men and had told her to close her eyes. What did she care for naked men? Her eyes had been open and she'd seen the light in Nerra Boil's eyes. She had cried and had hugged him tightly. He had hugged her so tightly it hurt, until he remembered he was in armor and loosened his arms. His eyes had tears in them as well.

"Waxer, did you bring the things I sent you?"

"Of course. Do you remember what belongs to whom?" Waxer had added his two hands to Numa's and, together, they quickly had a flame, then a small fire, in the firepit.

Boil loved that word: together. "Not something I could ever forget, Waxer." he said softly. Numa caught the pain and regret in his voice.

"What is in the pack, Nerra Boil." She moved to sit beside him, cross-legged.

He smiled at her name for him and Waxer. _Nerra Boil. Nerra Waxer._ They made an odd family: two brothers, two fathers, one sister, one daughter but only three in number.

"They are things… small things by necessity … that were confiscated from the prisoners. Things that have no intrinsic value; they have meaning only to the man who held them. But, because they held them as they slogged across the battlefields of the galaxy, these things are important." Waxer handed him the flap-top pack and Boil sat up, cross-legged. "Small things that I could take without getting into trouble and save for a day like today." He had removed his armor earlier, but it was within reach. He grabbed the chest plate. "Treasures like this." He turned the armor so she could see. Inside was laminated a picture, a five-year-old's best efforts. "Treasures like this. You were always near my heart. Every night and every morning, I saw this and remembered you."

"Did you know that you would rescue them all?" asked Numa. Her fingers touched the drawing she'd done so long ago. Close to his heart, like she was.

Boil's eyes were sad and his voice soft. "I didn't rescue them all, daughter." His fingers caressed the pack. "I have more names of the dead than of the living." Waxer gave him a rough, encouraging touch on his shoulder.

Numa, next to him, hugged him, tightly. "How many," she asked, "are alive instead of dead because of you? That is important."

He nodded, holding her tight. Other than Ahsoka when she'd understood his pain, he hadn't hugged anyone in ages. He hadn't touched anyone outside of duty while he'd been guarding. Those touches had not been kind, had not been full of love. Boil still felt starved for human touch and Numa seemed to sense that. Even now, as they sat cross-legged on his bedroll, her knee touched his leg.

He pulled the flap up through the restraining strap of the soft, messenger pack. The first item was Sketch's book. It was both the largest and the first thing he'd taken. It reminded him that he, also, had a small treasure attached to the inside of his own chestplate. That reminded him that many troopers had a treasure. That was when he had started looking for them.

Sketch's book was the size of his hand and had a pencil loop, though the pencil was long gone. Boil had seen that little black book among the new prisoners' belongings as he carried them to property. He'd pulled it, quickly riffling through it, recognized it and took it. That had been the first warning he'd had that Sketch had tried to run, his first warning that Sketch was going to be showing up in prison. If they'd seen that and connected it with Sketch… Boil didn't like to think of what _had_ happened to Sketch, but he hated to think of what _would have_ happened if they'd found the artist's book.

Boil had to remove the dedication page for security. It wouldn't do for him to be caught with an item with a prisoner's name on it. Also, Punch might still be out there. The book was Sketch's version of an after-battle debrief: pages of battlefield scenes, of dead and dying men, of droid wreckage, of city damage. Amazingly accurate. Terrifyingly beautiful. Interspersed among the pages of the battle scenes, were quick portraits; sometimes of other troopers, sometimes of civilian faces, a few animals.

Next was a holopic. It was a pretty girl with a round belly and a message of love in a soft voice. What she was planning on naming the baby. That was Col's. It had been affixed to the inside of Col's helmet.

Commander Cody's was next. A string of beads. Small. simple. It reminded Boil of the padawan braids of the Jedi. Boil had been there when the jailers had taken that from Commander Cody. His face got strange before it turned to icy scorn and hate. Boil had taken a demerit for that, claiming to have lost it somewhere in the storeroom when they came searching for it to torment Cody in some way.

Djinn had fought his captors to a standstill before they'd brought in sleeper gas. His only item was a small book of poetry with notes written in the margins. Boil set it with the other items.

A small, round pebble belonged to Leven. Boil hadn't been able to figure that out at all. Only that it was important, it had been glued to the inside of his chest plate, over his heart.

Another holopic, this one of an entire family, which confused Boil for the longest time. Then he realized that Riposte had made himself a family in much the same was as he and Waxer had. Except Riposte thought big. There were four human younglings, one Togruta youngling, an ancient woman .. or man … too old and wrinkled to know for sure, a young Twi'lek man, two woman alike enough to be sisters, one with a baby, and one older woman. Ten people crowded into the holo; waving and smiling, calling Riposte's name and one unconcerned baby. There was even some family pet, about knee high on the women, making noises and twirling in a circle.

 ---------------------------------

"Commander." Boil came up to him. He'd been searching for a moment the commander was alone. He saw Cody on one of the little hillocks, his soup bowl in his hand.

"Just Cody now, Boil." Cody smiled as he set his spoon in his soup. It was surprisingly good and filling.

"I kept this for you." He held out his hand. Cody couldn't see what was in it until Boil unwrapped his fingers and displayed the small string of beads.

Cody's eyes got moist.

Boil didn't want to see that. If touch had been rare in prison, intense emotions had been painfully commonplace. He grabbed Cody's hand and dropped the string of beads into it then turned to leave.

"Thank you, Boil." Cody said softly.

 _That was too painful._ Boil decided to return to camp and ask Numa to return the other items. By the time he got there, he realized that it was his responsibility to return everything personally. He took the pack down with him to the meeting. Numa was already there, helping Suu and Shaeeah clean up the cookware and prepare for the morning meal. He didn't know where Waxer was and that bothered him. You always kept track of your squad. He sighed and wondered if he'd survive the transformation from trooper to civilian.

The meeting hadn't started yet and Boil quietly entered the ring of conversation on the porch. Cody noticed him and shifted to make room for the scout. Boil smiled at Cody's unspoken apology. Cody had been doing that since they'd arrived on Saleucami. He didn't think he'd ever get a spoken apology; their relative ranks had been too different, he'd had to do some distasteful things in prison. Cody had never actually liked him; respected him for his skills, but not liked him. That was ok, Boil understood and being included was enough. He noticed the string of beads double-wrapped around Cody's wrist.

Waxer was at the edge of the yard talking with another trooper. It was good to be with his brother and daughter again. She had grown so much since he'd last seen her. Deep in reverie, Boil almost missed Echo's words.

"Scythe deserted. Any information, Cody."

Cody made a face. "They took him away the second year for attacking one of the troopers. It was after his fourth escape attempt. None of us saw him after that. Presumed dead." Fives, baby in arms, shook his head sadly and Echo put stylus to data pad with a sigh.

Boil laughed softly. " _I_ took him the second year." There was silence in the small ring of men. "His escape attempts kept spoiling my plans. He kept plugging up holes I could use, without actually escaping. So I took him, geared him up and," Boil stared at the ground with a frown, the tip of his tongue barely protruding through his lips as he remembered, then his face cleared. "Yes. I gave him orders to Coruscant with a connection through Corellia. I told him to desert at Corellia." Boil smiled as he remembered the salute Scythe had given him before boarding the transport. Although few, there had been some good moments and watching men go to freedom had been the best.

"How did you forge orders, Boil?" asked Rex.

Boil shrugged. "They weren't forged. Scythe became a trooper name Card who was laid up with a broken leg who didn't know he'd received orders."

Echo shook his head with a smile, his fingers on his chin. Then he notated the data pad.

"How did you gear him up?" Rex, again with technicalities.

"Through supply. Trooper prison was also a rotating supply center to Outer Rim battalions. I'd just pull something outbound from the supply transport. One piece of gear out of a battalion's package? By the time it got there, there'd be another order or it would put into supply and no one could tell where that one piece had gone missing." Boil shrugged. Sometimes there were extras in the count and nothing counted as missing."

"Helmets?"

"They don't calibrate on Kamino anymore. Calibrations are done and helmets keyed on the battalion-side. So they came with the armor."

"How many, Boil?" asked Cody quietly. "How many men did you help escape?"

"Not including Waxer? Not including this group? Forty-seven." There was both pride and sorrow in his voice.

Echo gasped.

Cody's hands shook and he had to sit down. "I'm sorry, Boil." he said. "I am so sorry for how I..."

Boil shrugged. "Can't share secrets like that." He looked Cody in the eyes. "Especially to men subject to torture and questioning at any time. I'm glad you know, but it wasn't an option then."

"How much support did you have, Boil?" asked Rex. He and his men had succeeded because they had acted quickly, before things were 'back to normal'; before new rules were instituted. He knew if they'd waited even just another day, they wouldn't have made it. For Boil to do this about once a month spoke volumes about his meticulous planning. To have done it for three years was more than Rex could fathom.

"None." Boil grimaced. "If I had ..." He shook his head. He wasn't a man to fantasize about how things could have gone.

"I'll want names, Boil. Dates, whatever you have. Do you know where they may have gone?" Echo's voice was eager.

"A few, mostly from the 212th, who I'd known before. The rest, I just geared up and took them to the spaceport. Told them what I thought their best options were and let them go." He looked at the ground. "I know some didn't make it. But I don't count them among the forty-seven." Boil looked at Cody. "I couldn't take captain or above. There were special procedures just to take you out of the pen. Otherwise, I would have taken you the second year."

Cody nodded. He remembered all the double-checks, the signing, the data pad and tracker verification that had to be done anytime he was moved, even from cell to the common pen or back. "I understand, Boil. Thank you for getting so many out."

Boil stood straight, proud, as if he'd just received a medal. "Yes, sir."

Rex looked around as troopers milled around the front yard of the house. He placed a hand on Echo's arm. "Later." He turned to Boil. "Boil, please come and talk to us later about this." He thought a moment . "May I make that announcement? That besides the men here, you've assisted in forty-seven other escapes." He saw Boil frown.

"I don't know, sir. It doesn't seem..."

"Boil, there are several reasons for the announcement. I'll give you the two most important. First, they will want to know if their friends escaped. We'll post a list after you let Echo know what you know."

"I have a dead list, also." Boil frowned, his face looking downward. "It's a lot longer."

"Yes, we'll want that as well, again for the men to know. The second reason is to protect you." He saw Boil's shocked expression. "Yes. You've pretty much single-handedly planned and rescued this bunch but they'll also remember everything that happened in prison. I don't want them taking it out on you. Or Waxer.” Rex paused, “Or Numa.”

Boil opened his mouth, shut it without saying anything and tilted his head. "Sounds good to me, sir."

Sketch had been delighted to have his sketchbook back. Boil had started to explain and apologize about the dedication. Sketch had told him that wasn't as important as tearing it out had been. "It would have meant your incarceration and how long do you think you would have lasted among us, Boil?" Boil had turned pale thinking of that.

Col had simply put his hand to his mouth as tears started falling. Boil had left the man to his own emotions.

Djinn was ecstatic to have the little book of poetry back. He insisted on reading his favorite to Boil. That hadn't been too bad, then Djinn felt he had to _explain_ it.

Leven was pleased with the return of the tiny pebble, but wouldn't answer Boil's question. "Just consider it my good luck charm, Boil."

Riposte had insisted on telling Boil who the people where, how they were related, their hobbies, habits. Boil had listened for what he considered a reasonable amount of time and then extricated himself from Riposte's company.

By the time Boil returned to camp, there were two beautiful silver moons in the sky. Softly he touched Waxer's shoulder to wake him, then pointed outward at the beauty. Waxer smiled, rose and they went running together.

**Jester**

Jester watched Saria help Cut and the medic get the man into the barn. She looked up and saw him, frowned sadly, then turned back to her business of saving lives.

Jester sighed as he sat on the porch of Cut's home. Two days ago, Cut had come over to his little house and told him that his brothers were coming back to Saleucami with a small cargo ship of brothers who'd run. They'd need help. There was no telling how many would need medical assistance and that mean Saria.

They weren't married yet. Her actions seemed to prove that she didn't want to marry him anymore. She'd moved out of his house seventeen days prior.

She was a citizen, a scholarly-trained nurse, and beautiful. He was a clone, a flash-programed soldier. He touched the big scar on his face. It was about three fingers wide and ran from above his eye to his jaw. The angry red had faded to dull reddish over the years.

He'd gone to her office. She'd been out, so he waited and when she came back there'd been the strangest look on her face. He didn't want her to feel obligated so he quickly explained. She could have his house or stay at Cut and Suu's, but there would be about twenty refugees coming in and there would probably be some needing medical treatments. He didn't tell her they were clones.

He had met her when she'd come to check on Suu about two days after Keeli's birth. Saria hadn't been on Saleucami for long, but she'd been a nurse for almost ten years. She thought him Suu's husband at first, carrying the baby around, carrying Suu, helping her. She called him Mr. Lawquane and he hadn't bothered to correct her perceptions. After checking on the baby, she had made him sit while she checked the burn on his face. It had been beyond her ability and Jester knew that, but her touch was sure and light.

She came back in two days to check on Suu, then again three days later. It wasn't for almost two weeks, when Cut had been there as well as Jester, that she understood he was simply Cut's brother and working as his hired hand. He was still Mr. Lawquane to her. As easily as that, his name became Jester Lawquane. Jester liked the name.

Jester started building himself a small home a little deeper in the forest, not far from the Lawquane's farmhouse. Cut and family came to help occasionally, usually bringing a picnic. He enjoyed their company and, if very little got done when they were visiting, he was usually twice as productive for the next few days. Jester visited them every day; checking on Suu and what help Cut needed. He'd been surprised when Cut had handed him a large stack of credits. "This is your share of the harvest. There's nothing I can pay for your help with Suu and the baby. But if you ever need anything I can provide. It's yours." Jester hadn't known what to do with such a large amount of credits and gave most of them back to Cut to 'hold for him or use it for the farm'.

He saw Saria often as came by to check on Suu, then later when she visited as Suu's friend. Jester saw her frequently when he visited Cut and Suu. He didn't speak much, letting Cut and the women converse while he simply listened. He had liked her voice and her opinions. He knew she had men interested in her; this was Saleucami where men outnumbered women about a hundred to one it seemed like. Jester didn't even dream, simply enjoyed her visits with Sue, the pleasure of a woman's company. He went from being Mr. Lawquane to being Jester. Sometimes Jester escorted her home then he'd lope back to his house at a soldier's pace. He changed the plans of his house, trying to think of what a woman might like; what one particular woman might like.

Saria had expressed concerned about visiting a patient in a bad area and Cut suggested she take Jester as bodyguard. Certainly, give him a place and time. He was there in his Mando painted armor; all business, dangerous and deadly. She had seen the blaster carbine in his hands and stared at it. Then at him. He'd been wearing his helmet so she couldn't stare at his face. But he knew she realized exactly what had made the big scar on his face. No one had bothered Saria with Jester at her side. He'd felt strong, good. Protective.

They'd been walking back to her home in the evening twilight, she simply talking, and Jester listening, carrying his motley-painted helmet in his hand, the blaster slung over his back. They'd reached her place and he had given her a soft kiss. He'd had to bend slightly. He'd placed his armored hand lightly on her shoulder and given her a kiss on her soft lips.

She had looked at him for several seconds and Jester worried that he'd been too forward. Then she smiled, sighed and leaned against him. He reciprocated by putting his arms around her, bending his head to kiss her again. He hadn't gone home that night. She had invited him into her house, into her bedroom, into her. He'd had experience; you couldn't live with Fives and _not_ have experience, but it had been different with her. The next morning he'd asked her to marry him. That had shocked her, but she'd smiled and said 'yes'.

That had been almost a year ago and Jester thought they'd never been further apart.

Now there were to be more brothers, competition for his lovely Saria. Well, she was free. If she liked his looks, there were plenty to choose from, most with no scars on their face. If she liked his strength, again, there were plenty of other troopers. The only thing he had, they didn't, was the house. And she didn't stay there anymore.

Jester sighed as he watched the men in the yard. Rex and Echo had tentatively given him a squad of six men: Leven, Djinn, Dub, Backup, Checkout, and Crux, right off the ship. He'd taken them and some others down to the farmhouse.

Echo had asked him to sergeant them while they went through debriefing, evaluation and out processing. While Jester thought it was a good idea to segue from the military forms to a more relaxed civilian forms, he wasn't sure he was the right person for it. He'd never been a sergeant, wasn't that good at giving orders, or even talking. He could tell them about his experiences after Order 66. He could tell them about being a person instead of a clone, dealing with people outside an official organization. That was about it. Echo had said he was a good listener as well. He could listen to their stories. Let Echo know which ones sounded like they'd need help adjusting mentally. Jester laughed and told Echo he should sign himself up for that first.

The more he thought about it, the better the idea sounded. He'd never been debriefed; none of them had after their departure from Coruscant. He'd gone to Echo and told him he wanted to be debriefed. Echo had stared off into nothing, nodding softly. "You're right, Jester. None of us has been debriefed and we need it. I'll make sure we all get debriefed."

When the troopers had gotten off the small ship, Jester saw Commander Cody and smiled. Commander Cody had debriefed him after the incident with Slick and he'd never had a better, more thorough debriefing.

He'd seen Saria at the farm that day, but hadn't spoken to her. She'd been busy preparing for possible surgery and he didn't want to disturb that. He'd helped her before, but she didn't look like she wanted any help.

Jester hadn't seen her in about fifteen days. He missed her. He missed listening to her. He missed her voice and her opinions. He missed the scent of her skin and the softness of her hair. He missed this look of amusement, that look of determination. He missed her kisses, her hugs, her love.

One of the men was badly injured and she was helping the medic carefully move him from the speeder to the barn. She glanced up to see him staring at her and turned her back after her own unhappy frown.

He'd sighed and taken the men Echo had assigned him to their camp. He told the other men they'd also be going to their camps as soon as things settled, once group to Cut, one to Echo but both men were busy at the moment. Jek invited them to come see the eopies and several went with him, while Shaeeah brought out Keeli and asked two to go help Suu and the rest to help with the toddler.

His men had picked up bedrolls at the porch, probably the first belongings they'd ever owned outright. There were plenty of different colors and patterns to choose from; Suu and Cut had gone shopping at every second-hand shop they could find for that many blankets. The men were surprised not to have to sign for the bedrolls. "Gifts." Jester had told them. "Chose a color or pattern you like. The price is a thank you, appreciation, a willingness to help. A willingness to give gifts in the future, when you can."

At their fire pit, Jester went over camp rules lightly. They’d been learned on Kamino and no one ever forgot anything learned on Kamino. More importantly, he touched on the rules of Saleucami, rules of family, of Cut's farmstead, children, farm animals, wildlife. They'd been a lot of questions from the men. Jester had no problems answering any of them. He thought, maybe he could do this after all.

Then he'd taken them down to the farmstead where Suu had prepared soup and fresh-baked bread. Goldenfruit was in season, so there were plenty of those as well. Again, the men were told to pick their own bowl and spoons, though they simply took the nearest one. That had been Rex's suggestion, get the men use to making decisions with small ones first. From the back porch, Suu let each man know he was responsible for keeping it, cleaning it. She said that plates, forks and knives would be coming the next day.

After the soup and bread, more delicious than prison food and GAR food by the unanimous decision of all six, Jester was sure none of his men would forget their bowl.

He released them for free time, letting them know that life outside the GAR was less regimented and they'd have to learn to occupy their own time. He suggested asking Jek or Shaeeah about the nuna and eopies since they'd be expected to help around the farm, or perhaps ask Suu if she had anything they could do. Otherwise, they were on their own, no loitering around the barn, now the med unit, or the house unless specifically invited by one of the principles. There'd be a meeting after dinner, civilian-time, he smiled and some of his squad smiled as well. That had always meant up to an hour late to the punctual troopers.

Fives came up to him and broke his reverie. "Jester, Sketch is in the house and I told him..."

"Sketch?" Jester's eyes went wide. So did his smile. "In the house? He can bunk at my place with me."

Fives frowned. "He can't do that, Jester. He's going to be part of Kix's squad.

"What wrong?" Jester's decided the universe was being particularly unfair today.

"His leg is all twisted and he can't walk on it. It looks like an old injury and pretty permanent. He can't take two steps without falling. He'd never make it to your place."

Jester frowned. He looked at Fives, his face suddenly pale. "Fives, how're his hands?" That had always been Sketch's concern, his hands, his drawings.

"Looked fine to me. Why?"

Jester smiled with relief. "Sketch draws. Beautifully."

"Go see him," smiled Fives.

Jester went to the house. There were a couple of men, including one of his new squad, Djinn, playing with Keeli and overseen by a laughing Shaeeah. Shaeeah was thirteen now, just old enough to flirt with the men who didn't always know how to flirt back, but tried. Jester made a mental note to bring that up with Suu. It would do no good to have either Shaeeah or any of the troopers unintentionally hurt by something neither had full understanding of. On the other hand, it was needed practice in dealing with females, something they hadn't been able to do much while they'd been in the GAR and not at all in the years they'd been in prison.

Jester had to stop and grin as he watched the big men rolling on the grass while a giggling Keeli tried to climb over them. Some of the men were sitting on the hillock, laughing at the child as they ate soup and bread. Then Jester was up the stairs onto the porch and in the small house.

The scent of soup was everywhere, as well as the wonderful smell of fresh-baked bread. Suu made the most delicious bread on Saleucami and Jester often wished he could take the scent of it home with him. She had taught him to bake and he did so, often, but her bread always seemed the best. He could hear her on the back porch, talking to some new men, telling them they were responsible for the bowls and spoons. Another trooper was helping her; one of his squad, Leven.

Sketch was at the table with Jek, who was doing homework. Jek always had that intense, wrinkled-forehead face for homework.

Sketch was relaxed and had several sheets of artwork already scattered in front of him. Jester could make out several portraits; Commander Tano, a tired, sleeping trooper, a quick study of intense Jek, as well as the view of the house from the west hill. His leg was propped up on the bench, a blanket and several towels were on his thigh and supporting his knee. His knee was twisted in and back at an ugly angle while his foot was twisted outward and up so his sole would be perpendicular to the ground. No, he would be able to walk to Jester's home.

Jester moved quietly and softly straddled the bench next to Sketch. He gently dropped his forehead on his friend's shoulder. For a moment he tried to blink back tears, then he let them fall. He'd missed his brother.

Sketch paused for a moment in his drawing, absently patted Jester on the knee and then continued drawing. Through his tears, Jester gave a chuckle. That was Sketch.

**Numa**

Their hands were wrinkled from washing the large soup pots and bread pans, and they were laughing softly at Jek's expression as he worked on his last page of schoolwork. This time, at least, aunt Suu had to actually inspect the page diligently before handing it back with the words, 'Two corrections, Jek.' He had sighed and trudged back to the table.

Sketch, at the table with his leg stretched out on the bench, warmed and support by blankets and hot towels, had looked at them with a smile. Then he quickly began work on another drawing, his eyes barely glancing down as his quick fingers drew.

Suu put up the last pan, grabbed two hot towels and took the four steps to the table from the kitchen. Numa and Shaeeah followed.

"May we see them, Sketch. Please. I've been watching you, on and off, for hours and I am terribly curious." Aunt Suu asked as she replaced two cooled towels with the hot ones. Sketch almost radiated comfort as he glanced up and murmured 'thank you'.

"Please," reiterated Shaeeah.

"I would also like to see them, Sketch." Long ago nerra Waxer had told her that using names was good with his brothers. It reminded them of their individuality. It was polite. He had amended that to 'it is kind'. Numa vaguely remembered Sketch from Ryloth; though not of Ghost Company like her fathers, he'd been with the 212th. He had been popular among the men in helping mark their armor.

It had been nerra Waxer who had told her she must spend time with Shaeeah, to listen to Madam Lawquane in many things. She'd been reluctant, at first. The first thing Madam Lawquane had said was to call her Aunt Suu, if she wished. Numa had wished. She had questions she did not wish to disturb her nerra with. Perhaps she could ask them of Aunt Suu. She'd never be able to ask Madam Lawquane.

"Certainly," replied Sketch, absently gesturing to the pages on the table. "Some of them are for you if you want; the house, that quick one of Jek." His fingers didn't stop though the girls had moved. Now he was looking down as he worked. "I'd like to give the one of Commander Tano to Rex and the one of Boil to Waxer." He smiled at Numa.

Suu picked up one, spread the others on the table. "Oh my." Suu's fingers came to her lips. "These are absolutely wonderful, Sketch." She spread the pictures out more carefully on the table, edge to edge, for a better view.

Shaeeah and Numa looked at the drawings she'd spread out. They were beautiful.

"Wow!" Shaeeah's eyes were wide. "Oh yes, Uncle Sketch."

Numa nodded and saw Sketch noticed her gesture with a quick smile at her.

The black and white picture of Jek had the same intense look that was on his face even now. The picture of the house was in color, almost like a dream surrounded by the protective trees. You looked at those trees and _knew_ they protected the house. Numa smiled as she saw a small drawing of nerra Boil, his face tired and triumphant. Waxer would love it.

Nerra Boil had given this man his freedom so he could create such beauty. She had missed nerra Boil for the longest time and had hated these men for keeping him from her. She'd seen the lost looks and growing wonderment in the faces of the men as she had handed their bowls full of soup back to them. She'd heard the amazement in their soft words of appreciation for something as simple as soup and bread. She didn't think she hated them anymore. "Yes, Sketch, they are wonderful".

A red flush covered his cheeks. "Thank you. I never thought much of it, but all the guys in the company thought it was the best thing. They could copy, for their armor and gear and such. Some better and some worse. I could actually translate real life into drawings or draw out my mind and memory." He laughed and continued speaking.

"Jester was the one who actually convinced me that I had a special gift. He was one of the worst. He was never satisfied with what he did and thought he'd always have white armor." Sketch was silent, smiling as he continued the drawing.

"You have real talent." Suu gently laid her hand on his back as she peered over his shoulder. "They seem to almost breathe with life." Already the one he was drawing was taking form. Shaeeah and Numa with their heads together, their faces bright with joy, their hands coming up to hide their laughter.

Suu sat next to him, looking closely at each drawing, at his hands. "They haven't come to move you to the med barn. If you don't mind waking early, you can stay here in the house."

Numa saw his eyes widened and a smile begin. Suu, watching the drawing take shape, missed that and continued.

"We can make you a pallet over there and.."

"He says 'yes', aunt Suu." Numa's quiet voice drew Suu's eyes to the trooper. He was nodding his head with a big smile even as he concentrated on getting the eyes correct in the art. He picked the pencil from the paper and turned his head to Suu.

"I'd really like that, Suu. For one, I like the opportunity to help you with food preparation, to be useful. The food tasting and warm towels are great." He grinned. "I like the pampering." She blushed softly with a chuckle. Then he became serious. "I think it would be better for my leg also. Perhaps that wall by the kitchen…?" he gestured with the pencil in his hand. "It seems warmer over there and keeping my leg warm helps keep the muscles from twisting up too much." They knew that hurt him. He'd had a cramp soon after he'd come into the house. He'd broken the stylus in his fist as he bent his head, eyes closed in a tight grimace, to the table. They'd brought him all the hot towels then, along with the blanket. He'd been pale for some time afterwards, worry in his eyes.

Her head gave a quick nod. "It's decided then. You stay here. Shaeeah, why don't you take Numa upstairs to see your room and bring down linens. Numa, will you help Shaeeah make the pallet?"

"Yes, Aunt Suu."

"Would you like to stay also? There is room with Shaeeah." aunt Suu looked at her with a smile.

Numa blushed a dark green. "No ma'am." She shook her head. "Thank you very much but I want to stay with my nerra for now. Nerra Boil has been gone so long and we have missed him. It wouldn't be right."

"I understand, Numa." She turned toward the table. "Jek, when you finish…"

"Got it, mom." He handed her the paper. She glanced for the corrections and gave it a nod. "Go find the medic and tell him Sketch will be staying here at the house. He was in the back not long ago. Do not go into the barn, wait outside if you must."

"Ask for Kix," said Sketch, as he continued the picture. "Any trooper will be able to point him out to you."

"Right. Thanks, uncle Sketch." Then he was off at a run.

"Two speeds," muttered Suu, under her breath as she shook her head. "That boy has only two speeds."

Numa and Shaeeah went up the stairs for blankets and pillows. Numa liked Shaeeah. She talked a lot, made a lot of moving noise and would not be able to move silent, like Numa, but what she said was interesting and fun. Numa thought it enjoyable to have a friend. She amended that, a cousin of her own age.

"Perhaps in a few days, Shaeeah," Numa said as they were gathering linens, a few blankets as well as two pillows, one off Shaeeah's bed, "you could come to camp to spend the night with me."

"That would be great fun, Numa." Shaeeah giggled. "I'd love to learn to walk as quiet as you."

"So you can sneak up on Jek." Numa smiled. She wasn't a giggling child, her life had been too serious. "That takes much practice. But nerra Waxer will show us the stars and name them."

Shaeeah nodded. "Dad says most things take time and practice, if you want to become good at them. I'll teach you to ride an eopie."

"Perhaps Sketch can ride one? To get around?" Numa sat on the bed.

Shaeeah thought about it as she sat next to Numa. "I don't think so. Even if he knows how to ride, you use your legs a lot and…" Her shoulder shrugged.

Numa nodded. "He would not be able to do that." She was still while she thought whereas Shaeeah twisted her fingers and fidgeted with her lekku.

"He is a happy person." Numa reflected.

Shaeeah laughed. "Right now, all of them are happy."

"Nerra Boil said they were going to a terrible place to die; he couldn't let that happen. So yes, they are happy. But I think that Sketch is a happy person anyway. Most of the time."

"Dad's a happy person, so is mom," added Shaeeah. "She has sad moments, but it's not how she normally is. Dad usually just lets most of the bad moments go."

"Nerra Waxer keeps the bad moments. He thinks about them often and he thinks about all the bad things of the future." Numa spread her hands and patted the pillow. "I do not think he has told nerra Boil yet, but he has said we cannot return to Ryloth."

"Why not?"

"Because they have no legal right to adopt me, though they have cared for me eight years. The man who holds those rights sold me to slavers."

Shaeeah's eyes grew round. "That's terrible, Numa."

"It is common on Ryloth, now, with the poverty. Even before the war, I'm told, it was not uncommon."

"What happened?"

"Nerra Waxer and Rex, Fives and Echo rescued us." Numa smiled. "That is where Fives found his wives. The head man had claimed them both. There was some arguing, and he ended up paying some money. Not Fives, the pirate." Numa paused. "I was not with them for long before nerra Waxer rescued me. Only three days."

"Dad destroyed a squad of commando droids. When Uncle Rex was here the first time. There were twenty. That was a long time ago."

Numa nodded. "Our fathers are brave and strong and love us so very much. So are all their brothers. Brave and strong and wise in war, I mean. But they are not…" Numa couldn't find the right word.

Shaeeah nodded. "I remember when dad first got here. He didn't know anything about nuna or eopie or farming. Mom taught him everything."

"I think that we are here to teach them something as well." Numa said slowly. "Rex has not asked that we younglings be sent away. When Ahsoka returns she will bring their other wife and his son. I heard Rex discuss the dangers of having so many brothers together and, in nearly the same breath, he included everyone. Family. That is an important word for him. For my nerra, also."

Shaeeah nodded. "Playing. I heard dad tell mom that one of the most important things he learned was how to have fun." Shaeeah added.

Numa nodded. "Nerra Boil once asked me why I danced; that he and nerra Waxer would take care of me and make sure I never _had_ to dance. He found it hard to understand when I told him it was fun. Finally I had to tell him it was like when he ran; for exercise and to clear my mind. That, he understood."

"Mom said they had to learn how to behave around children, around girls, around young women. Most of them are only eighteen." Shaeeah laughed, then went quiet and bit her lower lip as she remembered how quickly they aged. Some of the men had younger faces than her father's lined visage, but none of them appeared young. "Mom said I was old enough to practice flirting kindly. So you are too."

"I flirt badly, Shaeeah. It is not something my fathers have taught me, so I will leave that to you. But I will practice kindness," nodded Numa. "It is a kindness to use their names, to know them apart from their brothers."

Shaeeah stood up with an armful of blankets and sighed. "Sometimes that's so hard. Chopper and Jesse are easy, Dub, Shy and Gekko also have small scars on their faces. Edge has blue eyes. Some of them have tattoos. But I can't tell the difference between Baffle, Crux and Checkout. And I haven't even met all of them yet."

Numa grabbed the pillows and a set of folded linens. "Crux walks softly as though through a mine field. Baffle strides hard like he was on a ship and enjoyed the sound of his boots on the decking. Checkout is always looking around him." She tilted her head. "Perhaps that is where he picked his name."

"Thanks, Numa. I'll ask you if I have any problems with anyone else." Arms full, they descended the stairs.

They made the pallet for Sketch, asking him if he wished to be facing this direction or that. Shaeeah remembered an old lamp that still worked, asked Suu, and then ran off to find it. Sketch and Numa discussed if he would prefer his leg on the wall side on not. He asked why he had two pillows and Numa said one was for his under his knee, or to prop his shoulders if he wished to draw. Shaeeah came back with the lamp and a small table. It worked to define the space as well as hold the art supplies and a bottle of water if he got thirsty in the night. Suu moved a chair beside the pallet for him; for him to sit as well as support if he wished to stand.

"This is.." he was at a loss for words and almost about to cry. He swallowed and made a feeble gesture with one hand at the comfortable-looked, soft-lumpy nest they'd made him, thoughtfully enclosed and with a full water bottle on the little table. "This is wonderful. Thank you."

Shaeeah hugged him tightly. "You're welcome, uncle Sketch."

"You're welcome, Sketch." Numa hugged him as well. Softly at first, because he wasn't nerra Boil or nerra Waxer, then harder as she felt the beat of his heart. It was the same heartbeat she heard in her fathers' chests.

Numa went out on the porch for a moment. Tears were in her eyes. He had been so astonished that someone had thought of him, thought of his comfort., thought of things he might use. She didn't want him to think she was crying in pity. Even if she was.

Another man was sitting on the edge of the porch. He was in clothes very much like Cut so she assumed he was the other brother from this planet, Jester. He seemed unhappy, dejected. She sat next to him, swinging her legs a bit. He looked at her. He had a large scar on one side of his face and Numa inspected it curiously.

"You are Jester?" she asked.

He nodded, "It's hard to miss the scar."

She frowned. "No one mentioned a scar. It was the clothes. You are dressed like Cut."

"Oh." He seemed to give this some thought. "You're Numa? Boil and Waxer's daughter?"

"Yes."

"I've met them both. Good men."

A woman came from the barn, saw them and waved. "Jes, please come. I need you." She called.

"If only you did…," he murmured as he rose and moved toward the barn.

Numa frowned. "She insults you, Jester."

Jester turned his head even as he moved toward the barn. He gave Numa a soft smile. "My name is hers to mangle if she wishes."

She sat on the porch for a while, contemplating the new men. Wounded men, in body and spirit. Contemplating her fathers. Were they that wounded? Had they ever been? Numa didn't think so. But then, why not? Would she even know if they were, she was so use to them the way there were?

Numa went back into the house. It was Shaeeah's turn at schoolwork and she was mumbling over math problems. Numa sat next the Sketch, quiet while his fingers drew, her body touching him. He noticed. "That feels like kindness, little one, warm and comfortable."

"It is a small gift. I would put my arm around and hug you if it did not impede your drawing."

He smiled and continued drawing. "I have a drawing planned for you. It is a small gift, as well."

When Cut had come in and announced the meeting would begin shortly, Numa took the colored pencils, his artwork and the blank flimsis to the little table by Sketch's pallet. Cut had admired the space they'd created for Sketch. His brows rose in amazement at the pictures Sketch had done. Together with Suu, Cut moved Sketch to the porch and a chair. She and Shaeeah brought a blanket and hot towels for his leg.

Sula, paler than usual after working so long with Kayl, was also in a chair with a shawl around her shoulders, the baby in her arms nursing. Numa was amused as all of the men so obviously avoided looking at Sula once they realized what she was doing. Numa shook her head. Didn't they see the love on her face? Didn't they see the infant, so immersed in feeding? Numa felt she could watch that interaction for hours. Fives was seated cross-legged on the porch at the side of Sula's chair, Keeli asleep in cradle of his legs. Almost everyone was there now.

Rex, Echo and Cody were standing on the porch, nerra Boil was there, between Rex and Cody. He seemed pleased at something; his shoulders more relaxed than mere hours ago, a smile playing around his lips. Nerra Boil almost never smiled fully. Catching his smiles was like catching the swift-moving fish in a river. Numa went to his side, putting her arm around his waist. His arm went around her shoulders and gave a quick squeeze.

Jek came and told his mother that he'd told the medic about Sketch, and they were working on the man with the broken jaw. Nerra Boil, his arm still around Numa, moved out to the yard where nerra Waxer had found a comfortable clump of grass for them all. She sat between them, making sure to touch them both. They were not wounded like these men, but she felt sure they were wounded is smaller ways.

Cut spoke first, welcoming them to his farm, pointing out that no one had to leave until they decided to move on, introducing himself. He'd paused and then told them how he'd deserted. Suu moved by his side then, let him put his arm around her. He was quiet a moment, as were all the men, remembering those who marched far away. Numa had tears in her eyes. She had known men, her nerras’ brothers, on Ryloth who had gone out, laughing and talking, who had never returned.

Suu spoke. Tomorrow's breakfast would be nuna eggs and fried topatos and toast. They'd receive plates and forks then, leave the bowls and spoons at camp. Anyone was welcome to come early and learn to cook. She warned they'd be expected to help. Most of the men seemed interested and Numa thought most of the men would be at the kitchen earlier than the food would be served. She was scheduled to be there as well.

Rex stood before the men and took a moment to look them over.

"Gentlemen," Rex's voice roared. "You are no longer military. You are no longer prisoners. When I say 'at ease', I do NOT mean parade rest. I do NOT mean in formation." He looked them over with a stern eye and Numa realized they were in some order.

"Gentlemen, as the last order which I hope you feel compelled to obey, AT EASE." He waited. The men seemed frozen, seemingly unable to make more than the smallest movement of not being in that position, hands at their back, straight. It was unknown territory for them. Rex waited patiently.

Then, there was a laugh from one man. He had scars on his face and silver lines in the growing stubble of his dark hair. Chopper. He moved to one of the big trees that shaded the house, one of the trees that Sketch had drawn as protecting the house. With a few quick moves, he was seated on one of the lower branches about two meters high, his back to that big trunk, one leg hanging down, the other on a branch. He was so obviously comfortable. Jek whooped and ran to the tree. He started to climb and Chopper offered out his hand.

Another man, she didn't know him, moved out of position hesitantly and sat on the grass not far from their family. Numa waved at him and he bit his lip in apprehension, then softly raised his hand. It was enough and Numa smile at him. He smiled back cautiously.

Slowly the men milled about, finding positions of comfort. Some move a little closer to the porch. One, Countdown, brazenly set on the bench at the porch stairs then looked up, a worried look on his face. Rex must have given some invisible sign because he relaxed.

Another man, Gekko, joined Jek and Chopper in the tree with a stunned look on his face. Numa smiled at that. "They're having fun," she whispered to her fathers as she looked at the tree. Nerra Waxer gave a short laugh and a nod. Nerra Boil merely looked perplexed.

Rex did not begin until every man there seemed comfortably located, no one standing. He spoke the longest. Introducing Shaeeah, Jek and herself as family. Numa smiled. He said that word, 'family' with such meaning. She saw than most of the listening men caught that word as well. He pointed out that Jek and Shaeeah lived on the farm and could be expected to know quite a bit; they also had responsibilities. At that point, Shaeeah had unexpectedly gone to Rex and whispered in his ear. He nodded with a smile and then announced that Shaeeah, Jek and Numa invited everyone to join in games daily before dinner in the front yard. Numa caught her eyes and smiled. She hadn't thought of that.

Rex went on to explain they would be exit briefing, out-processing, and evaluating health including psych. The men were silent.

"They're scared, Numa." Nerra Waxer had whispered to her. "Exit briefing, psychological evaluation has usually meant re-conditioning on Kamino." His mouth was grim. "At best."

Rex's voice continued. "I'm the first one scheduled for a debrief. I've been told that my psychological evaluation is not a good one and I will be spending time with med." He glanced at the gathered men. "Did I mention that it's the lovely Zeltron ladies who will be doing much of the mental health evaluations as well as Saria?" He paused and smiled at their surprise. "This is not Kamino. This is not the GAR nor the Imperial Army nor prison. No matter how bad your evaluations, you will be making your own choices. I would ask you to speak to me or Cut before you make your final decision; but if you want to go, you can. If we think it is a bad idea, we will try to talk you out of it. Our concerns will be for you, for the men remaining here and the safety of our families."

He gave the porch to Cody. Cody spoke of them being men, individuals. He said there was no longer any rank between them, he was Cody, not commander, not Commander Cody. Rex was Rex, not captain, not Captain Rex. And definitely, neither of them were 'sir'. Their camp leaders were not sergeants, not 'sir', simply men with experience.

Numa was quite proud of Nerra Boil when Cody announced that not only had Boil rescued them, but had rescued some forty-seven other men in the course of the last three years. She hugged him tightly. There'd been silence then; every man turning to her father with surprise, admiration and respect on their faces. Cody said that a list of these men would be forthcoming and not to bother their family with questions at this time.

Echo spoke next, explaining how the men were to be divided into groups, rules to make the time here comfortable. He spoke too quickly for Numa to catch everything. "The troopers will catch it, Numa." Said Nerra Boil, noticing her dazed look. "It's instructions mostly for them."

Echo's voice didn't catch attention like Rex's voice, but it had a cadence. "Divided out: Ship, when it returns, will be Rex, Ahsoka, Aureki, Barin. House will be Suu, Fives, Sula, baby, and Saoha, Shaeeah. Med barn will be Kix and Saria with wounded: Kayl, Sketch, Kaver, Dare and Riposte. Edge, you'll assist, med barn with Kix. I'll be Camp 1 with Jesse, Chopper, Countdown, Pax, Baffle and Cody. Camp 2 Cut assistant Jek, Col, Gekko, Quad, Shy and Riven. Camp 3 is Jester. Troopers Leven, Dub, Backup, Djinn Checkout, and Crux. Scouts' camp is Boil, Waxer, Numa. If anyone wants to change camp, talk to their camp leader and then me. Flexibility is encouraged. They'll be no loitering near the barn or the house doors. Briefings will be scheduled, sign up; the side of the house will have those notices. Any pilots, mechanics or slicers, see me later."

He glanced up, took a breath. "All notices, in fact, will be posted there and if you have a notice or questions; post it and someone will respond. There are a million things to learn and we won't begin to cover them all. I'd suggest checking it daily. Tomorrow will be a free day for most of you. That's when Cody will begin debriefing Rex, me, Fives, Jester, Cut." He smiled. "We're a little overdue for one." That got some laughter, but it was a hard, biting laughter. "Relax, think about your future. You have one and it's yours for the planning."

Echo slowed down, coming to the end of his words. "This is all new. Remember that you are brothers and help each other. Help us out as well." Echo paused and glanced back to Cut and Suu, their arms entwined around each other's waist. Cut looked at Suu, then gave a soft nod to Echo. Echo turned back to the men. "In case you missed it, Cut and Suu have said that no one has to leave; that they will open this farm to everyone here, if that's what happens. Gentlemen, Kamino is only the place where you are from. This is home. You are home and this is family."

Numa saw how those words affected the men. Some openly had tears in their eyes, some few were smiling. Most had that stoic look which said it hadn't fully sunk in yet or they didn't believe it. She wondered if those men were the most broken.

Rex once again began to speak. His wife would return with his family. He hoped. There was still some danger that the Imperials would find them. Rex bowed his head. "If that happens. Run. Grab a child if you can, but run. Run in groups of two and three. Survive. Do whatever you have to do." He pointed. "That way is a Gran enclave, five klicks, presumed friendly if they aren't overrun." He pointed a different direction. "That way is a town, thirty-five klicks, probably best to avoid." Another gesture, "that way is forest, then geothermal desert."

Numa shivered. She did not need to think of what would happen if the Imperials came. No one did.

Rex continued. As people completed out-processing and made decisions about what they wanted their future to be, they would be taken where they wished. Within limits. Nothing Core, nothing in an active battle zone. He hoped no one would go alone. He encouraged partners. He said they would be given credits to begin their new life; not a lot but sufficient for a start, about 2,000 credits per man. Rex looked them over, seemed to catch every man's eyes. "Gentlemen," he said, "I am proud of you and honored to know you." He saluted sharply, then dropped it quickly before anyone could jump up to return it.

They were free now; with decisions and choices and their lives ahead of them.

Rex smiled. "Over the last year since I've been here, Cut and Jester have found a thermal pool not far away and done some work on it. We'll set up a schedule for using it, by squad and family. But this evening and tomorrow, it's all yours. No more than ten men in the pool at a time." He turned and walked down the stair, off the porch and sat on the bench next to the man already there.

It was the end of the meeting, Numa knew, but there was nothing that marked the end for the troopers, no shout of 'Di-SMISSED'. Cody yawned and turned to Cut and Sketch, discussing something. Numa saw the men were confused, but Jek was pulling his two new friends by their hands.

"Come on, let's go. Before the others get there first."

"Come back by second moonrise, Jek." Suu called out to him, as she took Keeli from Fives' lap to take him into the house.

"Ok, mom," he called back, already running across the yard, the two following him at a lope. Numa could see the man with the scars on his face understood fun. He was grinning as wide as his face allowed.

Suu's call seemed to be the impetus for the troopers milling about. Several moved in Jek's direction, following the two who'd gracefully pushed themselves from the tree and run after the boy.

Some men simply stay where they were, relaxing on the soft grass. Two went up to Rex, one to the small circle that was Cody, Cut and the seated Sketch. Four went to Sula, probably to see the baby asleep in her arms. When had these men ever seen an infant? This one had been born with their freedom.

One came to nerra Boil. She felt her father tense slightly. The other man simply stood for a moment. "Thank you, Boil." He finally said and held out his arm. Boil gripped it tightly, a brother's handshake.

"Waxer, Numa. This is Riven. Riven, my family." Numa noticed he said 'family' like Rex did. Nerra Waxer smiled and reached out his hand. Riven clasped it with a shake. Numa rose to her feet. Softly, she gave Riven a hug. He froze for an instant, then patted her back. It was odd, but her nerra had that reaction, so long ago. When she'd first met them.

"Will you be at breakfast cooking tomorrow," she asked conversationally as she sat down and gestured for Riven to sit. He did after carefully looking at both Nerra Boil and Nerra Waxer for approval.

"I don't know. It seems impossible to believe, but until this evening, every meal I've ever had has been rations, prison food, or came out of the white wall of the mess."

"Then come early. There is no mess here or on most planets and you will need to learn a few small things." She wrinkled her nose. "Or else survive on rations for the rest of your life."

Nerra Waxer laughed. "We did for six months. It was not pleasant.”

Riven laughed nervously. "I think you and the supper have convinced me."

"Mostly supper, I suspect." said Numa. "It was delicious, wasn't it?" Riven nodded.

Boil stood and patted the messenger bag around his chest. "I have a couple of things I need to do privately. It may take a while so I'll see you back at camp."

"Ok, Boil." Waxer leaned back on his elbows, comfortable, relaxed, his legs stretched out in front of him.

"Yes, Nerra Boil." She was cross-legged, facing Riven, and touched nerra Boil lightly on the leg. He reached down to pat her hand, smiling.

Riven stayed for a short while, conversing. Awkwardly, but conversing; then declared he wanted to find out about the thermal pool. Numa waved as he strode in the direction most of the men had ended up going.

Numa got closer to nerra Waxer. He put his arm around her, sharing the warmth of his chest and she leaned into his shoulder.

"Nerra Waxer, what do these men need to learn?"

"How to be men, my daughter. How to make decisions, how to take care of themselves, how to love. They have been troopers, they have been prisoners. Their entire lives they have been given orders and had to follow them. They need to learn to trust themselves, trust in their decisions.”

"Nerra Waxer," her voice was soft as they watched the light bugs flit among the stars. "I have heard someone say that these are broken men. Are you broken? Is nerra Boil broken?"

He hugged her. "Yes, beloved daughter. Boil and I are both broken. More so than Cut. Less than these men. Less even than Rex and Echo and Fives. Myself less than Boil. But we are broken."

"How do I fix you, Nerra?"

He chuckled softly and answered in Twi'lek. _"By being who you are, beloved daughter Numa."_

**Sketch**

It had been good to see Jester again. He'd been so shocked to feel that familiar head against his shoulder. Jester had cried and Sketch'd had tears in his eyes as well. They talked about the past. Sketch didn't have much to contribute after his incarceration and Jester had seemed reticent about what he'd done recently. Sketch let Jester know that Chopper was here as well, though he had changed in the intervening years. For the better, Sketch had told Jester with a grin. Jester said he had some duties, but he'd be back after the meeting. It had been good, but … incomplete. He'd thought to see Jester at the meeting, but he wasn't there.

It had been a good meeting, full of hard work to be done and the promise of victory, if they knew what to hear. That word, 'family' had sounded wonderful to Sketch's ears. He was glad Cut and Suu would open their home. He didn't think he'd be going anywhere with his leg. When the muscle spasm had ripped through him earlier that day, he'd been scared; terrified they'd toss him out as useless. Scared he'd end up begging and crawling in the street, at best, or turned in for the bounty. But they'd wrapped him in warm towels and love. They'd made him a special place in the house. They'd taken special effort to make sure he'd be comfortable. It brought tears to his eyes just to think of it.

He'd be a cripple for the rest of his life and it hurt to think that, but he'd do what he could for his family; for Cut and Suu and the kids. They were as much family as he was ever likely to have. There wouldn't be any woman in his life, no woman for him to love, no children of his own to hold like he'd held Sula's newborn baby. He wasn't even sure he could function with a woman. But there were his brothers, Cut and Jester; maybe others would stay as well. There was Suu and Shaeeah. There was Jek and Keeli. Sketch nodded to himself. He'd be Uncle Sketch. It was a good family.

Boil had come up to him afterwards, asking if he wanted help getting into the house. Sketch had looked around. At the moment, there were plenty of people to help. He didn't think Suu would let everyone absently walk off before he was back in the house. He was comfortable. The night was cool and his leg, wrapped in a blanket, warm, so he declined Boil's help and was amused to see Boil actually look uncomfortable. Boil moved to his other side, using his body as a wall between them and the others on the porch. Sketch realized he had hoped for privacy. He reached into a soft pack draped over his chest and brought out a small black flimsibook.

Sketch looked at him. "Is that…?"

"Yes. I was working property when it came in. I recognized it. It's not every day you see a bound book." He handed it to Sketch. "It's not complete. Someone tore out some pages and I had to get rid of the front page and…"

Sketch laughed as he flipped through his book. "Of course, you did, Boil. You don't know what this means to me." He looked up at Boil. "Actually, you know exactly what it means to me or you wouldn't have risked taking it. They would have incarcerated you too." Sketch lovingly touched the cover. He'd wondered what had happened to his book of drawings when they never confronted him with it, never tormented him with it. "And how long would you have lasted among us, Boil."

Boil turned pale. He hadn't thought of that, he'd never been an imaginative man. They would have killed him within a few days.

"Do I have you…" Sketch continued on conversationally, "to thank for keeping my hands intact?"

Boil nodded, "I tried to keep their attention away from your hands. It's probably my fault they did that to your leg. I notated your file to say you loved to run."

Sketch shrugged, smiled, and changed the subject. "Numa's growing up. You've got a wonderful daughter. She is kind, considerate, full of love and very intelligent. Like her fathers." He paused. "Thank you, Boil. You've done more than could be expected of any man. If I can ever repay this debt to you, I will."

Boil shook his head. "It is not a debt. It is a gift. As much to myself as to you and the other men."

Boil seemed to shift from foot to foot, although he hadn't moved. "I don't know what we'll be doing next, but I mention it to Waxer and Numa before the meeting and they're agreeable. If you want to join our family, there's an open invitation for you." His lips twitched upward at Sketch's naked shock. "Not that we have anything planned except staying on Saleucami for a while. I thought you might like a forewarning before Waxer or Numa started asking you questions you'd find invasive or in case you're worried about your leg or anything. You always have a home with us."

"Thank you, Boil. I.." he shook his head looking at his recent jailer with amazement. "Just thank you, Boil." He smiled. "That's a better gift than my sketchbook."

Boil had left then, patting the messenger bag around his chest and Sketch wondered who else would receive a visit, what other treasures Boil would be able to return.

Jester came back then, sat next to Sketch, and leaned his head back against the wall of the house. His hair, longer than regulation, but somehow 'right' on Jester, was damp with sweat and messily push back off his face.

"What's the matter, Jester?"

Jester shook his head. "Actually, nothing. I'm just wrung out. We got Dare's jaw aligned and it looks good now according to Saria. We had to double his time under anesthesia though and re-break it and grind off a burr of bone. After Kix had set it, one of the guards pushed Dare's face against a wall. Dare wrote that he hadn't felt any difference and this was when one of the other men was dying and Baffle took a beating. He didn't think it worth mentioning to Kix at that time. He didn't know his jaw was crooked, healing crooked." Jester gave a deep breath his eyes closed. "He was miserable. They had to go in and sand off that little burr of healed bone. We were all miserable. That drill has an awfully shrill pitch; enough to drive anyone out of their skull."

"What were you doing, Jester?" Sketch was curious. Jester had no medical training or experience that he knew of except on the receiving end. If Jester was helping in medical, then a lot had changed.

"When Saria doesn't have the outright strength to do something and the proper tool isn't available, she'll put her hands to mine and use my strength. We've done it before; setting a dislocated shoulder, pulling a broken femur back into line. She put her hands around mine, set them on Dare's jaw and together we broke what had healed wrong." He scratched his chin with the back of his curled fingers. "She could probably do that with Kix, maybe even better with Kix. I think I'll suggest it." Jester shrugged. "Depends on how long he plans to stay. I suspect it's part of that 'follow orders' clause in our flash-programming and she explains how much pressure is needed very well. But since we've done it before, she trusts me."

"Jester, who's Saria?" Sketch knew she was the nurse, but Jester spoke of her in a tone of more intimacy.

"These days," Jester's voice was soft and he stared towards the barn, "I don't know." Jester looked about to cry. "I just don't know." He repeated.

Sketch nodded softly, starting to understand why his earlier talk with Jester had seemed incomplete. There was incomplete business between him and the nurse.

"Jester. I need some help getting back into the house. The girls have fixed me up a nice spot. It's right near the kitchen, real warm, out of the way. I've got a chair, table, comfortable bedroll. All the comforts I could desire. You have to see it."

Jester smiled and stood, putting his arm around Sketch. Kix was coming across the yard and ran the last few steps to help. They got him into the house and to his comfortable-lumpy nest where Kix indicated he wanted Sketch on the chair. Kix squatted on one knee. Sketch showed them his drawings and asked for some hot towels from the kitchen. Jester brought them in for him then sat next to the pallet going through the art with Kix looking over his shoulder.

"I'll bring your cot tomorrow, Sketch That will make it easier to get up. But this looks really good. It's warm, out of the way, convenient. You couldn't ask for a better spot." Kix admitted. "It's better for you than the barn."

Sketch gave both men a lop-sided grin. "You ought to see the pampering I get. I get the first taste of anything, hot towels whenever I need one. Cut or Fives or Rex coming in, they sit to talk with me so I know what's going on. Sula or Saoha walking out, I get a bit of flirting; hugs and soft kisses." He shook his head. "Only thing that keeps me from thinking this is some wonderful dream is the leg. And that makes it real."

"How is it doing," asked Kix.

"One really bad cramp this morning. I thought I was going to puke. But I think that was a leftover from the ship. It was shortly after we came down to the house. After that long a ride…" Sketch shrugged. "I really expected a few more. Since then, I've kept it warm." He smiled. "Suu and the girls have kept me supplied with hot towels."

"Let's see it." Kix said.

With Jester's assistance, Sketch stood and pulled off the cotton pants, his teeth gritted against the pain. There was so much less pain than usual. Sketch shook his head, prison had been usual for him up until now. Normal was what he was feeling _now_ , not what they'd subjected him to in prison. Kix inspected his leg, touching carefully. He shook his head.

"It looks about as good as I think it will ever get, Sketch. If you ever get the chance, see some specialist in orthopedics about bone rubbing on bone. Particularly your knee. That's where most of your pain comes from. The rest is from where muscles have been pulled from their attachments on bone. I'd like Saria to take a look at it too, sometime. Maybe in a few days when everything calms down a bit. She might be able to offer some alternate suggestions."

Jester nodded. "You couldn't have someone better on your medical team than Saria."

Kix snorted. "Saria said you found her less exciting than the neighbor, less exciting than a 35 klick run, less exciting than a tree stump." Jester simply looked down as Kix started pulling Sketch's pants up for him. Sketch reached at the waistband and finished.

Jester shook his head. "Just because we … don't deal well with each other anymore, doesn't mean I don't recognize that she is a dedicated, brilliant and wonderful nurse." He laughed. "If I was dying, she's the person I'd want fighting for me. No matter how much she hates me, she'd still do her best."

Kix nodded. "She had that determination for Kayl. Without her, without Saoha and Sula, I'd have lost him."

Together, Jester and Kix set Sketch comfortably on his pallet. Jester stayed, sat next to him and they talked as they had long ago in barracks. Sketch told him about Boil's offer, how he'd felt after hearing Cut say no one would be turned away, how he'd felt being crippled. He described all the pain stored up in his soul from prison, from his leg, from knowing he'd never have a family like Cut or Fives, from missing Jester, from what he'd done in the Jedi temple.

Jester had listened and clasped Sketch's forearm with one hand, the other on his shoulder. "We're brothers, Sketch. We'd be brothers if one of us had been born Wroonian and the other Twi'lek. My home is yours. Right now, it's difficult for you to get to, but it's not an insurmountable problem and I will take care of it."

Three homes, three families in one day. Sketch felt rich beyond all imagining.

"What about you, Jester? I'd heard that you and Saria were engaged. You can't have talked to her about me yet."

Jester's brows came down and he frowned. "I think she's broken off the engagement and she's no longer at the house. She said I'd have to share." Jester looked at the floor and his voice was soft. "I can't share." Then he looked up into Sketch's eyes and smirked softly. "I certainly can't help you with advice about women, Sketch. I don't have one of my own."

"She seems important to you. Maybe you can learn to share, Jester." Sketch said softly as he laid a hand on Jester's shoulder. "It seems that Rex and Echo learned."

Jester shook his head. "Maybe with you, Sketch, my brother. But not with the man's she's chosen."

Sketch considered his brother carefully. He was glad he'd seen Jester before meeting Saria. It would be interesting.

**Col**

Col stared into the dying coals of the fire. It was morning, an hour before dawn. They'd been on Saleucami for barely a day and already he wanted off. He looked at the holovid held in his hands then clasped it tighter. Boil had brought it to him. He'd had some explanation but Col hadn't listened after he'd stammered his thanks. Boil had shrugged and walked away from camp.

He'd been with the 187th on Dantooine. They'd been decimated and it was said that no one had been able to walk off the field of battle unassisted, except the general. Col himself hadn't even been found by the searchers. The seismic driver had sent him, heels over head and spinning, into a wide, slow-moving river that meandered through the grassy plain. He would have drowned except for some piece of plastic detritus floating by he'd grabbed at in painful desperation. The rest, he didn't remember except in rare nightmares.

Col did remember waking up. It was night and the cloudless sky was strewn with diamond stars. There'd been the sound of a musical wind and pain everywhere in his body. There was a small fire, like this one, Col remembered. A small, warm, gentle flame that crackled softly, that glowed a soft, cheery orange-red. The musical wind had stopped and a cool hand caressed his face. A warm voice caressed his soul. He'd wept to know he wasn't alone. She'd sat next to him through the night and most of the next day, playing that wind flute.

Essentially, he'd been half broken; the side of him that had faced the seismic driver was shattered. He had broken ribs, clavicle, scapula, humerus, ulna, radius, tibia, fibula and a cracked femur. He'd had a concussion as well. Later, he'd found out he'd also had a cracked pelvis. There'd been no bacta tank or med droid, only her.

She had sat there, taken care of him, not leaving him for days at a time. She'd built a small shelter of grass bundles over him to keep off the rain. She had lain next to his good side to keep him warm, to keep him company. She listened to him rage, weep, curse, cry. She had taken care of him physically without embarrassment.

He'd been a little healed when she moved him to her family's compound. He'd been somewhat healed the first time he'd made love to her under that diamond sky. He'd been mostly healed, only a limp and some stiffness in his shoulder, when he'd left her to return to his unit. There'd been a lot of questions about where he'd been for such a long time, but his damaged bones were proof sufficient.

Cut sat next to him, disturbing his reverie. "How are you doing, Col?" He asked. Col looked at him, dipped his head in respect and spoke.

"I want to leave."

Cut seemed a bit hurt, but smiled. "You've only been here a day."

Col couldn't explain but perhaps the vid could. He flicked the sound off; no need to wake anyone else and dropped it into Cut's hand.

Cut flicked it on. Col watched her face with a smile as the blue likeness flare into their vision. Ehveen was beautiful. Making the vid had been a special occasion for her. She'd done her hair up and worn her best dress, the one with flowers embroidered down one side. It was tight around her belly.

"I was 187th. She pulled me out of a river on Dantooine and nursed me back to health." Col glanced down at the warm coals. "It took a while. As soon as I could, I returned to my unit. I received this a year later. I've received nothing since." He shrugged. "I was amazed to get this."

Cut nodded. Communications were not encouraged, particularly between troopers and civilians. He sighed. He hadn't thought this part of his work would begin so early. "So, why do you want to go back?"

Col looked at him as though Cut was insane. "Look at her, she's pregnant. With my child. Colehve if a girl, Colehn if a boy; our names combined."

"What will you do? It's been, how long, seven years since this vid?" Cut pushed. "She probably doesn't even remember you."

Col groaned as he put his face in his hands. "I'll talk to her. I hope she remembers me. I'll see if she wants me to stay; hope she wants me to stay. I'll go away if that's what she wants."

"What do you want, Col?" Cut knew that so many of the men found it difficult to articulate their wants. He still found that difficult. Some troopers believed they didn't even have wants; they'd been programmed so thoroughly to believe their only purpose to follow orders.

"I want to hold her, love her, make love to her." Col looked Cut in the eyes. "I haven't done that with anyone else, even when I had the chance," he said in an angry voice. Col was quiet for a moment. He stirred the coals with a stick. "I want to be with her, help her on the farm. Help her father with the nerf. I can do that now that I'm healed."

He glanced at Cut. "Can you believe I know how to milk a bantha? Blue milk in container has nothing in common with the fresh stuff." Col laughed softly and Cut smiled as he glanced towards sunrise.

"What else, Col?"

"I want to meet my child. Let him know his father…" Col's eyebrows furrowed. "I don't know. Let him meet me. Let him know that I do care for him, that I didn't just desert him."

"But you did." Cut pointed out.

Col moaned and dropped his head to his chest. "I know. My loyalty was to the army. I didn't realize that the army had no loyalty back."

"So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know. What can I do?" Col looked at Cut. Cut saw it was an actual question, not a plea to some nameless, formless, uncaring fate.

"Well. You can start the out processing."

Col snorted. "I'd be way down on the list for debriefing. Commander's already …"

"Who?" asked Cut.

"Commander Cody," answered Col, a bit short.

"Who?" repeated Cut softly.

Col looked at him, remembering the meeting. "Cody."

Cut smiled. "Yes, he's going to be pretty busy for a while. Still, perhaps you could go at this backwards."

"What do you mean?" asked Col

Cut shrugged. "There's no rule saying you have to get your debrief first. Sign up for first available, then work on the physical and psyc while you're waiting for the debrief. I suspect that Rex will be doing debriefs anyway even if he isn't cleared." He shook his head. "This is not the army and they aren't going to keep records. This isn't a fitness evaluation to Imperial standards. This is mostly to determine that your chance of survival out there is good. That you can find some kind of work. That you're not going to have a mental breakdown the first time you walk into a store and have to choose between a hundred different possibilities. That you can determine if someone is insulting you or trying to pick you up or asking directions to the nearest park."

Cut paused for a minute. "Even so, you're going to seem a little off to most civilians. You'll find yourself saying sir and ma'am. Not saluting is terribly difficult." Cut looked down and handed the holovid to Col. "Even after almost eight years, I still sometimes react like a trooper instead of a civilian."

Col nodded. They'd gotten him out of prison, away from Kamino. After that trouble, they wanted to make sure he stayed alive as long as he could. He looked at the holovid, flicked it on again and paused it at the point where Ehveen looked up, one splayed hand on her pregnant belly, the other reaching up for him.

"How long do you think it might take?" He asked Cut while he stared at her figure before him.

"I have no real idea. How long were you with her? What kind of work do you think you could do? What kind of practice did you get on Dantooine about being just a man?"

Col nodded. There had been times on Dantooine where she or one of her family would simply stare at him in wonder or frustration. Then, normally, they'd give him a quick hug of acceptance; he would ask and they would explain. "Can I have some flimsi and stylus? If I make a plan to show progress maybe they'll see that I'm serious."

"I can. And I think that's a great idea." Cut didn't tell him that he already had Cut's voice on his side.


	5. First Week on Saleucami

**Third Morning on Saleucami**

**Saria**

Saria sighed as the man came into the makeshift office in the barn. Kix was at breakfast, Edge was with Kayl and Dare. This man was the first trooper to come to her office. He did not have the look of a troubled man. He was not a patient.

He took one look at her guarded expression and the corner of his lip gave the barest quirk, as though he might, one day, think of smiling.

He had a neatly trimmed mustache that circled to both sides of his chin, the only mustache she'd seen so far. His hair was also neatly trimmed; more neatly than the rest of the men. He wore the black pants and turtleneck of a trooper uniform rather than the soft sweats they'd provided. Like all his brothers, like Jester, he was tall, strong, broad in the shoulders and handsome. His eyes were red-brown instead of Jester's golden-brown. This one was confident. He didn't need to see her.

"You don't like flirting?" He had noted her body language.

Mentally she groaned. Nearly every man she'd seen yet in camp had said something. Two of them had proposed marriage. Four had proposed sharing, whatever that was, and even one who hadn't spoken more than a few words, who hadn't even raised his head to see her, who would so obviously be seeing her professionally, had hinted.

"I enjoy flirting," she replied with a smile. "But subtly, not blatant." She looked at him, so confident standing there. "Most of the men here haven't quite discovered, 'subtle'."

His lips made soft movement as thought trying to smile, though it didn't quite reach his eyes. "That is a foreign concept for most of us. Still, I'd feel as though I hadn't tried."

She held her hand out, palm up. "Please give it a try."

"Shall we get married? I'd love to share you. You are absolutely beautiful. You have the most perfect breasts I have ever seen." He strung together in one long sentence. The last part, at least, had some semblance of emotion behind it.

"No, no, thank you and thank you. That was the most average flirting I've heard from anyone." She thought a moment, "Except the part about the breasts. That was..." she paused, seeking the right word, "individual."

He gave a soft chuckle. "I suspect it's what most of the men are thinking. They merely aren't as… blatant as me."

She caught his humor and laughed softly. That was a plus for his psyc.

He sat down in the chair opposite her without her direction. "If you're still unattached in a half-year, I will very likely come see you and be more serious." He didn't smile, but he did relax. "And subtle, of course. At the moment, though, there is too much going on."  He shrugged.  "I'm here merely to talk and to open the way for my brothers."

Definitely confident.

"I'm Saria. I've been trained as a surgical nurse and have some psychological training as well, however, there will be no in-depth psychological evaluations, merely overviews. We want to make sure you will be able to manage once you leave Saleucami." She smiled. "May I have your name?"

He waited, watching her, inspecting her. His eyebrows flicked up, questioning. "If I give you my name, will you insult me?"

"No, of course not."

He shrugged. "So, for you to insult me, I'd have to be sharing you?"

Her mouth opened again. "What….?"

"You may call me Boil." He was quiet. Waiting. Watching. She'd never seen a man sit so perfectly still. She'd never seen a man so obviously observant.

"Boil." She said his name cautiously. She was torn between asking why he was there and what those two small sentences meant.  "You're the one who rescued the men."

He glanced down at the floor with a smile, then back to her eyes. _Not shyness,_ she decided, _humility._

"It could not have been done without me. But, ultimately, it was the squad which pulled it off." He shook his head. "I could not have done it without them."

"Do you have any nightmares, any symptoms of battle stress such as…?"

"No." Then he shrugged. "A few minor symptoms. Hyper vigilance. Sleep disturbances but no nightmares. Paranoia. Though that could be a requisite for survival rather than a symptom of anything else. I think I'll keep the paranoia." His lips quirked again, as though he'd wanted to smile, but didn't dare. "I go out running for relaxation. Waxer and Numa sometimes join me." He looked her in the eyes. "I've been doing this for three years with no backup, no support, no friends, and very little recognition.  I've had no time off for good behavior and I'm tired. I'm taking care of that now. I have my family with me. Doing what I did; Cody publically recognizing that the other night, I think, will go a long way to helping me."

"I believe so, as well." She nodded. "You did a very courageous thing."

"It is no more than what any of my brothers have done. Sketch would draw pictures in the dirt for the men's entertainment. He could have lost his hands for that. Chopper would take the blame and go to solitary for almost any disturbance that happened. Kix kept them as healthy as he could.  He was growing a colony of antibiotic fungi on damp bread?" Boil shook his head. "How did he know how to do that?"

"It's not difficult at all. Simply…" she began, but he cut her off with his words.

"Not difficult for you. You are trained in linear thinking; you can pull together a myriad of trivial facts and connect them. Kix is flash-programmed. That provides only answers, no extraneous information, not the pathway, no understanding of why that particular answer is correct. There is a great deal of difference between them."

He closed his eyes and shook his head. "Cody kept reminding them there were more than just clones; they were brothers, they were men. Dub told stories and recited ribald lyrics."

Saria had tears in her eyes. What they had gone through was painful to contemplate. "I've heard a little of what happened. I expect to hear more." She wiped her eyes, it wasn't professional, but it was human. "You seem as though you're dealing with everything very well. You have an idea of what is troubling you, and are working towards your health. Why then are you here?"

"My daughter, Numa, has told me two things. She says first, she would like to speak with you about an incident which happened a year ago or so. She has not told Waxer, my partner, she wants to see you."

"I'm here, mostly, to help the men with adjusting to life after being in prison." It wasn't a refusal and Boil didn't take as such.

Boil nodded. "She was sold off to slavers by her uncle. Waxer, Rex and his men had to rescue her."

Saria frowned with dismay and her eyes went wide. Boil saw she'd talk to Numa.

"She tells Waxer she was not raped and that's good for our family."

"That is very good. Rape can just tear a family apart. I cannot imagine what that would do to your family." She saw Boil nod, knowing it would rip both him and Waxer to pieces.

"And for a child …"

Boil spoke, again statue-still. "She is not a child anymore according to Ryloth law though she doesn't have adult status either. She has asked to speak with you in confidentiality and I support that." He puckered his lips in thought. "She wouldn't lie about anything, much less something this critical. But last night and the night previous, when I went out for a run, I notice she was awake staring at something I couldn't see. She was still awake when I got back; even if she did close her eyes and try to fool me, pretending to be asleep. And that means my daughter is hiding something." Boil shifted in the chair. "That bothers me."

"Certainly, I'll talk to her." Saria thought a moment. "Under the same confidentiality as I talk with the men. Not even notes. With or without Saoha, whichever she prefers." She looked at him. "Neither you or Waxer will hear of this again unless she tells you or asks me to tell you."

"Good. Thank you. I will let her know and she will come at a good time for you." He thought a moment, utterly still. "If she asks you to tell us, make sure to ask her whether me or Waxer or both. We are very different." His lips quirked in secret amusement.

"I will make sure to ask her that as well. What's the other thing she said that made you want to see me?"

"She wants to know why you insult Jester"

"What?" It burst from her lips. "I'd never insult Jes."

Boil looked at her as he stood to leave. "You just did."

\------------------------------

"What have you done to my trooper, Saria?" Rex's body practically vibrated with rage as he blocked her way.

"I've done nothing to Jester." She was under no illusions as to which trooper he was referring to. Rex was possessive of his men in a way that was almost pathological to her civilian mind; as though he were responsible for them; from their health to their actions. Cut had told her that was normal for a clone captain.

"He said you weren't pleased with him, that you'd taken Chymdura as a lover."

"That's a lie!" She amended her statement at Rex's expression, shaking her head. Jester didn't lie and she knew that. "No. That's wrong and I don't know where Jester got that information." Saria shook her head. "It's purely professional with Dr. Chymdura. He's almost twice my age."

"And you're almost twice Jester's age, in case you've forgotten, if it's even relevant. Jester said you wanted to share and Jester doesn't share."

"What does that mean anyway, Rex? I've gotten proposals from about half the troopers to share."

Rex looked around. In the distance he could see some of the men going around the building to read the notices. Several were heading to lunch at a walk, eager for the good food supplied by Suu.

"In this group I would say it means they have so little self-esteem that they'll accept any attention you give them. A touch on the hands, a small hug, a kiss on the cheek, a little flirting, or even just being seen with them by their squad. If you share those small touches..." He shook his head. "They've been in prison. They haven't seen a woman in all that time. While we were escaping, one man stared at Ahsoka and Saoha as they flew the ship. He'd never seen a woman in the flesh. Touching him on the arm would make him deliriously happy." He glared at her again. "Those would be fine and count for nothing with Jester. He'd appreciate you making his brothers feel welcome.  More usually though; more healthily from your point of view, sharing means that they'll be willing to share you with another lover or they're willing to share you with the man or men or women of your choice in a long-term relationship. The way Fives shares Sula and Saoha. "

"Like you and Echo share Ahsoka?"

Rex was quiet for a moment. "I don't share. Neither did Echo. I was lucky enough that Echo learned to share. It's why he's first husband." He looked at her as though she were a small, particularly nasty insect. "And there is another partner in our marriage, Aureki. Do not forget it."

"Well, I don't share either, not sexually. I am faithful to Jester." She frowned, her eyes getting moist. She did not want to cry in front of Rex.

"Then why'd you move out? Why does Jester believe you're with Chymdura?"

"I don't know why he thinks I'm having an affair with Dr. Chymdura." Her arms moved up in frustration. "I moved out because Jester was never there, always going out on his run. I'd come back from working with Chymdura, he's mentoring me in obstetrics. And I would just tumble into bed most nights. Yes, I was exhausted and the sex, what little there was of it, wasn't that great. But it was a temporary situation and Jester knew that. He even told me he approved of me learning more about obstetrics. He said after everything it made him happy to know I'd be helping bring babies into the world."

Her face twisted. She would NOT cry in front of Rex. "But every night he'd go.  Thirty-five klicks in two hours. Right." She couldn't help the sarcasm that dripped from her lips. "Just enough time to run over to Cass Cjain's house for a quick fling then back and too tired to even bother kissing me, never mind making love, never mind talking to me or listening to me or holding me. He shared. He just never told me."

Rex shook his head. "I doubt that. He was too involved in you. And if he did share, he'd tell you. Jester is not a secretive man." He shook his head again. "Jester doesn't share." Rex narrowed his eyes. "I've heard that you insulted him publically here."

Her mouth opened slightly then closed softly, she had no anger there. "I don't know. I never thought of it, but it was brought to my attention this morning that calling Jester 'Jes' was an insult."

"It is. A clone's name is one of the two things that are absolutely his. What have you done about it?"

"What do you mean?" Her mind wondered over the other of 'two things' a trooper came of Kamino with. Armor, perhaps?

He tilted his head, still angry, his eyes still glittering. "Have you bothered to apologize?"

She hung her head. "Not yet. I've been busy with Kayl and Dare. And Jester's been …"

"Then do it and leave him alone." Rex snapped _. "Osik_. You two seemed so happy when I visited last. Now he's about as broken as the rest."

He turned his back sharply to her and was gone. She felt like a door had slammed in her face.

Ok, now she could cry.

She walked stiffly back into the barn, ignoring Edge at Dare's cot, ignored the sleeping Kayl, as she moved into her makeshift office and shut the door before the first tears tumbled from her eyes.

\------------------------------

Saria saw Jester, finally, walking past the med barn toward the house. Was he avoiding her?

"Jes. Ter." She called out for him from the med barn, running a bit to catch up with his long-legged stride. She didn't want to get too far from the wounded men in the med barn. She realized she had almost compounded the error. "Jester, please wait." She glanced up and realized she hadn't had to say that. He'd stopped at her first call.

There were a few men and Shaeeah in the front yard playing with Keeli, now watching them. Two men were walking with Jester, they continued moving toward the front yard, giving Jester his privacy to converse with her.

It had been here they would have heard her insult him, when she'd called to him yesterday. It would be a public apology; she had planned it that way. It seemed only fair. She caught up with him.

Saria wanted to smile at him, at those golden-brown eyes, see his soft smile in return. His face was simply still, a small frown on his lips, two parallel lines between eyes, his eyes with none of the joyful animation she knew. Rex was wrong. Jester wasn't a broken man; he just no longer had any interest in her.

She didn't smile. "Jester, I want to apologize for insulting your name. I was so busy and there was a lot…" She bowed her head and stomped her shoe into the dirt. "Oh, never mind that. I have no real excuse and I apologize. I will not to do so again and if I do, please correct me immediately."

"Apology accepted. Is that all, Saria?" His expression hadn't changed much, but there was something softer in his gaze, in his lips. As though he wasn't angry, simply sad. She wanted to kiss those soft lips. Not that she'd dare, not after the last time she'd tried and he had abruptly walked out of the house for 'a run'.

"There is something else. I don't want to leave Kayl and Dare. Kix told me about Sketch and I have some crutches in my office. You know the office, the keys and codes. C'Layndjura knows you, so getting into the building won't be a problem. I really can't send anyone else without it drawing a lot of attention. The crutches are in the supply closet." Her lips tightened. "I didn't realize that prison would be so cruel as to not provide crutches as needed." She looked at him and he nodded softly. "I think the tall ones would work best at the moment, but bring the forearm crutches as well." "

His eyes were interested, suddenly animated, and full of life. No, Jester wasn't broken.

"Can Sketch use crutches? It seems his twisted leg is longer. If he could, I know it would really mean a lot…" He smiled softly at Saria and her heart double-timed. She knew the smile wasn't really for her. Rex might be pathologically possessive, but Jester wasn't far behind. She was beginning to suspect it was a trait all the cloned men had been given. It certainly made for loyalty between them.

"Certainly, he can use crutches. Maybe not great, but we'll work on that. In a standing position, the muscle should relax so his leg is slightly bent. We will manage."

"Certainly, Saria, I'll go. I can't thank you enough. Is there anything else in your office you might need?"

She thought a moment, her head shaking slightly, "No, I don't think so. But ask Kix also before you go. He may think of something." She pointed towards the back of the house. "He mentioned being hungry, so he's probably having lunch."

Jester started to turn away but she touched his arm and he paused. "I really am sorry, Jester." she said softly. It wasn't his name she was apologizing for now and he knew it.

Softly, he shook his head. The frown was gone, but the look that replaced it was no better. "It's not something I can do anything about, Saria." He looked as though he was about to say more, but he turned to go look for Kix.

She had expected anger or indignation or confession. She had expected argument or justification. She hadn't expected his look of sadness.

Saria put her hands over her face, _Tsu'kain,_ she was tired! She pulled back her hair, retied it, and turned back toward the barn.

One of Jester's brothers came toward her moving at that graceful, quick lope. Warrior's pace, Jester and Cut called it. He had no marks, no tattoos or scars on his face. She watched him; his hands, his shoulders, his face, for what made him individual. Once she'd met a brother of Jester and Cut and looked for differences, she had no trouble telling him from any other brother. This one had fighting scars on his knuckles, not uncommon on Jester's brothers, but he also had a slight scar on his thumb. That would make it easy. His right shoulder was slightly stiff as he moved. Old injury, perhaps? He moved with loose hips, ready to move quickly to either side. She nodded. She'd know him from now on.

"I will escort you back to the barn." He gave her a smile.

She groaned. "I don't need this." She muttered. She could see whatever he had planned vanished as he quickly improvised. Mentally she gave him a plus on his psyc.

"I will simply escort you back, give you a short shoulder rub if you wish, and visit Kayl." He fell in step with her. "You need one; your shoulders are crowding your ears."

She chuckled at that. He was probably right; it had been a rough few days. It had been a rough few months.

She'd had her patients as well as mentoring with Chymdura. He was a brilliant obstetrician, but his schedule didn't mesh very well with hers and that made for long nights and weekends. He said it was good preparation for recalcitrant babies who never came when you calculated they'd come.

Then Jester ignoring her. She couldn't understand that. He'd been so joyful when they'd gotten engaged, when she'd said 'yes' to his quiet, hesitant proposal. She stopped thinking in that direction or else she'd start crying. Again. She'd been crying an awful lot since Jester had begun ignoring her, even more since she'd felt impelled to move. He'd been avoiding the house when she was there, taken to sitting outside on some tree stump outside. That hadn't seemed fair, it was his house. So she had moved.

Her face twisted. Jester had gone to Cass Cjain's the first night she'd had to meet Chymdura. He'd been late, a breech birth of Wroonian twins that ended happily for mother and children, less happily for herself. She'd come home sometime in the early morning of the next day, rather than late the previous night. She should have gone to sleep. Jester hadn't been there. She looked for him rather than falling into bed. She really should have gone to sleep. She met him coming up the pathway that led to Cass Cjain's house. He'd admitted he gone there. He even admitted he'd gone there with the intention of bedding her, but denied anything had happened

'What happened, Jester? Truly.' She had asked. In retrospect, she realized she'd been too exhausted to make sense of anything. It had been a bad time to discuss anything. She really, absolutely should have gone to bed.

'Nothing, Saria. Absolutely nothing.' He had shouted. Something she'd never heard from him before; he had actually raised his voice and yelled at her.

Saria had believed him. Mostly. Except he stopped sleeping with her, stopped kissing her, stopped hugging her, stopped looking at her and spent much of the day communing with the blasted tree stump.

Jester seemed so sad and she was no happier. She had decided to return to Jester's home. She would ask him, beg him what had happened between them; why he didn't love her anymore. That she'd give up learning obstetrics, if that's what he wanted. Then Cass Cjain showed up in Chymdura's office a week ago, on one of Saria's days, newly pregnant. After the preliminary exam and Cass' departure, Saria had locked herself in one of the examining rooms and cried.

Saria looked at the man who was staring at her. Apparently, she hadn't taken a step in several seconds.

She sighed. "I think my shoulders are crowding my brain. I'd really appreciate a good shoulder massage if you can manage without making too many proposals."

He narrowed his eyes and thought a moment. "Shall we settle for five proposals? I don't feel that's too many." He smiled and her heart flipped again. It was so much like Jester's smile.

"How about none?" She bargained.

"I can't go for that, I have a reputation to protect."

She raised an eyebrow. He rolled his eyes.

"…a reputation to build." He corrected himself, trying to keep his face straight. He was so obviously enjoying this; learning to flirt. "Three proposals."

She sighed deeply. Was this 'sharing'? "One proposal is the most you should ever make to one person."

"One proposal and two propositions." He chortled.

Touch. Rex had indicated they were all starved for touch.

"One proposal and a public hug," she countered.

He swallowed and asked softly. "A hug?" His eyebrows rose and his face became doubtful. "I don't know if I'm ready for a hug."

She smiled. "You'll have to learn and its one of the basics of flirting."

He straightened to his full height. "Done." He nodded sharply. "I can propose and hug one time."

"We're in public. Would you like the hug now?" she asked. In some ways, flirting with Jester's brothers was fun. They were so innocently enthusiastic flirters.

He glanced around. "No. Yes." His eyes held near panic. "I'm not sure."

"It's mostly the woman's choice anyway."

"That's good." He was obviously relieved.

"I'll tell you what. Sometime, within the next four days, I'll give you a hug."

"In public." He reminded. She smiled.

"You are definitely not ready for a private hug." She said.

He contemplated that briefly. "What comes after private hugs"?"

They'd reached the barn by then. She sighed. "Long, sweet private hugs with kisses and full body contact and hours of touching." She looked at him with a smile. "But then, it's not flirting anymore." He nodded, somewhat stunned by his new knowledge.

"I'm sorry. I don't know who you are."

"Crux. I'm with Jester's camp. He says you are not married."

Saria's face lost the smile. Crux caught that and changed what he was going to say. "He said it's always good to practice dealing with people. He said we weren't good at flirting and it was the beginning of courtship ritual." He looked down, then into her eyes with determination. "One day I'd like …" he wasn't sure and substituted, "long sweet private hugs with hours of touching. When it's not flirting anymore."

"A wife, a true love." She whispered softly, her face terribly sad.

Jester'd had a similar sad look on his face when Crux had asked him about the women in the camp. Suu was Cut's no sharing and gentle in flirting, he'd been told. Sula and Soaha were with Fives, Jester didn't know about sharing but flirting was like breathing for Zeltrons. There would be two more women, Ahsoka and Aureki, Rex and Echo's wives; again, no sharing but flirting was probably allowed. The two girls were younglings and Crux had earned a cuff on the head for even mentioning them, never mind what their fathers would do. Saria…  Jester had gotten that sad look and said simply. "She's not married. She claims to have no lover."

Her face crinkled up and Crux thought she was about to cry. _Fierfik!_ He was barely learning to talk with a woman, bravely flirting with her; he had no idea what to do if one cried! He turned to the man on the cot. If he was making her cry, then he should leave the conversation.

"Hi, Kayl. How are you feeling?"

"Doing ok. Saria says I can actually leave the barn in another day or two. I can't wait."

"You can't walk, Kayl." Saria reminded him as she nodded to Edge's request for relief. "I'll be here for a while, Edge, at least until Kix returns." She turned back to Kayl. "We'll take your cot out with you on it. How about on the porch? Does that sound good?"

"That will be great! When can I walk?"

"When I decide."

"A clue," he begged with a grin. "A hint?"

Crux watched Kayl; this was flirting. Maybe he'd ask Kayl for some hints.

"If your progress continues at this rate," she relented. "Three more days, maybe four."

Saria smiled softly as she checked Dare. He was sleeping normally now, and on his back. There was a bit of a small, whistling snore, but that was from the opening of his lips rather than in the back in his throat. Jester had done a good job with the break. He always did excellent work. Saria had wired Dare's jaws, something she hadn't wanted to do, but it had been unavoidable. He'd have a new scar on the back of his cheek, near his ear. She'd make sure he had wire snips on hand at all times. Maybe in a few weeks, she could take out the wires and replace with a flexband. That would allow some movement; including a bit of talking softly and eating soft foods. She'd have to wait and see. She touched her hand to his forehead and cheek, then a finger at the mastoid process and ascending ramus, where the break had occurred. There was no heat, no fever. She would keep him on antibiox for two more days. She noticed his eyes were open. There was no haze of drugs or squint of pain, simply tiredness. "How do you feel, Dare? Tilt your head to the side for good and bend forward…"

He tilted his head but added the shrug of one shoulder. She took that as 'mostly good' or maybe, simply 'better than before' or possibly 'as good as can be expected'.

"Ok, for the next day, I don't want you to nod or shake your head. It's too easy to forget and shake hard or nod and smack your chin into your chest. Particularly with painkillers. That wouldn't be good. You can tilt for affirmative, yes, good, positive and bend forward for negative, no, bad."

He relaxed, looked past her to Crux, sitting on a wooden chair and made a few short gestures with his hand.

"Sure, Dare. I'll let her know."

Saria looked at Dare. "I think you've been holding out on me." She smiled. "I just picked up that it might be easier to make your wishes known than I originally thought." He looked in her eyes and tilted his head. His mouth didn't move but his eyes seemed to smile. She smiled back and turned to Crux.

"He's hungry, for one thing. Thirsty too, dry mouth thirsty and a bit of a headache, I think." He looked at Dare questioningly. Dare tilted his head to one side. "Pretty smart, Dare. I'll go get some broth for you." Crux moved out of the barn quickly.

Saria moved to her supplies and brought him water with a straw. "Much of the headache and dry mouth is from the anesthesia. I have something to take care of both as soon as you have about two good swallows of water." She watched him as he sipped through the straw, nodded and set her fingers gently under his jaw, around it, feeling. "Just another sip, please. Good, good." She murmured as she felt the muscles of his throat and each side of his face. His jaw felt straight, correctly aligned. He didn't wince and if that continued, she'd start to worry about nerve damage, but for now, so close to his surgery, it was probably anesthetic. She smiled and held up two little packets. "Muja flavored or plain?" she offered. He took Muja-flavored and sprinkled it into his water then made a hand gesture at Crux already back, standing there with a bowl of broth.

"After soup, he says he'd like to sleep unless you want him up and out." Crux chuckled. Kayl, watching, also laughed.

"No. Sleep is good. The surgery was harder on you than we anticipated. Your surgery wasn't yesterday; it was the day before yesterday." Dare blinked in surprise, looked at Crux who nodded, then finished the treated water. Crux handed him the soup and Dare slowly started sipping it through the straw. Saria turned to Crux. "Am I correct in assuming that you and he are stretching the meaning of those signals?"

"Very much, ma'am." Crux smiled. "Sleep was 'maintain position', headache was 'enemy small arms fire', up and out was 'attack'.

Crux pulled a stool as well as a chair from against the wall. He sat in the chair and set the stool in front of him, then gestured for Saria to sit. "I can give you a massage while we visit Kayl."

She sat down and his firm fingers started working magic on the tight muscles of her shoulders.

She dozed softly, leaning against his legs while he talked with Kayl, while his fingers relaxed her shoulders and neck. He gently maneuvered her head forward and began massaging her scalp. She gave a soft moan, barely cognizant of her surroundings. Mentally she tried to figure out how many hours had passed since she'd slept, since she'd eaten, since Jester had told her of the refugees. He hadn't told her they were all his brothers, but she hadn't been surprised. Nor was she surprised to discover she couldn't remember when she'd last slept or eaten. She did remember when she'd moved out, remembered Cass Cjain's due date, remembered the last time she and Jester had lovingly stayed in bed, laughing in pleasure and giving each other massages. "Mmmm, that feels wonderful," she murmured.

"Of course, it does." Crux's voice was so much like Jester's. "It's my way of ensuring you'll look upon my proposal favorably." Saria recognized the joking tone.

"You're not really going to propose, are you?" she mumbled softly.

"Well, I figured that a month of shoulder massages would work in my favor once I actually got up the nerve to propose."

She chuckled. "They would if…" her voice paused.

"If?" asked Crux. She was silent. He shrugged, softly tilted her head back with gentle fingers. She smiled and murmured something in her sleep.

"So, Kayl. Should I propose first or get my hug first?" Crux turned to Kayl, softly massaging Saria's neck.

Kayl laughed. "Definitely the hug first. The proposal is just practice?"

"Not if she says 'yes'. I like her."

"She won't." Kayl was shaking his head with a frown. "She's good to flirt with, but… it seems as though she's humoring us. I don't think she's serious about any of us."

"The story of my life." Crux sighed with a smile as he looked down at sleeping woman. "Other guys get women to swoon in their arms; women fall asleep in mine."

"You've been watching too many holovids, Crux. Do you know anyone who's actually had a woman swoon in his arms?"

"Well, now that you mention it…." muttered Crux.

\------------------------------

Jester came into the barn with both sets of crutches. Crux, Kix, Chopper, Edge and Kayl were talking. Dare was asleep on his cot, shoulders and head supported by several cushions.

"Where's Saria?" he asked.

Edge pointed towards the fresher.

Crux shook his head. "I'd given her a shoulder rub and she'd fallen asleep here between my knees. Then, bam, she jumps up almost breaking my jaw and giving herself a concussion. Staggers into her office, holding the top of her head then comes out and headed toward the fresher. Less than five minutes ago." He shook his head again. "I'm going to have to rethink this entire woman thing." He tilted his head thoughtfully, "although the flirting was nice."

Jester looked up to see Saria, absently rubbing the top of her head. She had a somewhat dazed look on her face. "I see you have the crutches, Jester. That's great." She blinked several times just looking at him. He almost groaned in frustration. He wanted to hug her so badly. He wanted to let her know he loved her and he wanted to try to work this out, somehow.

She grabbed him by the elbow. "Let's go see Sketch. He'll want to try them first thing, won't he?" She turned to Kix who was walking into the exam room with Chopper.

Chopper was easy to identify. Besides his scars, he had a wry sense of humor, asked lots of questions and had the clearest body language Saria had ever seen.

"We may be a while, Kix, but I'll be in the house if there's an emergency. I know you can handle anything that happens."

"I'll be doing preliminary with Chopper." His eyes smiled at her. "He would like his physical done."

Saria grinned. "That's delightful. Good for you, Chopper." She called a little louder.

"If I pass, ma'am,." rang out from the exam room.

"Ok, then Edge you're in charge. Don't let the patients bully you." She glanced at Jester, smiling. He was surprised and almost smiled back. "We'll be at the house fitting crutches for Sketch.

"No, Saria," Edge answered, his blue eyes watching her and Jester.  "I can manage." He looked at Crux. "I'll send Crux if anything occurs." Crux nodded his agreement.

"Good, good." Saria waved absently, pulling Jester toward the house.

She had him by the arm, the closest she'd been to him in two months and twelve days; a very busy two months and twelve days. She smiled. He felt so good by her side.

He caught her smile. It twisted his heart. "You were flirting with Crux?"

She stopped and looked at him. "Please Jester, I know you don't share. I know you believe that I'm having an affair with Dr. Chymdura. I know that Cass Cjain's pregnant. But, today, I would just like to be in a good mood. Let's not discuss any of that." She glanced down to the ground. "Please. Let's at least pretend to be friends."

"I don't have to pretend, Saria. I am hurt, but I will not give up on your friendship. I was only asking about Crux because he wanted to learn how to flirt. He's not serious at this time."

"I did pick up on that. He said it would be a month before he proposed."

He opened the door for her.

Sketch was sitting on the bench at the table and saw them as they entered the room. His leg had warm kitchen towels and a blanket on it.

"Heya, Sketch. We've brought you a gift." Jester held the crutches up."

Saria saw a grin slowly form on the man's face. It was one of the most open, honest, innocent expressions she'd ever seen.

There was no guile in the man at all. Sketch held out his arm for his brother to clasp and then his hand for Saria, smiling at her and watching her face with amber-brown eyes. He was so obviously pleased to meet her. Around him were various pencils, charcoal, flimsi pages and actual art paper, slightly yellowed from age and dusty from storage. She only caught a glimpse of the art already done on the table, but it showed a dedicated artist.

"That's great, Jester. You must be Saria. Please have a seat." Sketch laughed, pleasure shining from his face at his visitors. "I'll offer you something to drink, but you'll have to get it yourself." Saria sat next to him and a soft pink shade colored his cheeks. Jester laughed and sat across from them.

"I've heard a lot about you, Sketch." Saria smiled back. "I am very glad to finally meet you, glad that you're here, glad you're free."

"I'm glad to be here too. As free as I can be with my leg like this." He gently touched his leg, covered by the blanket and hot towels.

"We're here to bring you a bit more freedom." She said. "First, I'd like to know how much pain you're in and how much you think you can manage crutches."

Sketch thought about that, his brows contracting over his eyes. "Pain is usually constant. Kix says it's due to bone on bone contact. It's mostly centered around my knee. There is more bone contact around my ankle, also painful." He shrugged. "It’s chronic and I've gotten as use to it as possible." Saria nodded.

"I also get muscle spasm when my leg gets cold." Sketch frowned. "Those are really bad."

"How bad are they?"

He frowned, his lips twisting in remembered pain. "Puking bad."

"Tell me what happened, in order." She knew this wouldn't be easy for him.

"They hamstrung me. About three years ago. Cutting the tendons on the back of my knee. Then twisted my leg in toward the center of my body as far as it would go. Then further." His face went both grim and sorrowful.

Jester stood up and gesture her to stand. He sat next to Sketch and put his forehead on Sketch's arm and his arm around Sketch's shoulder. Saria sat across from them.

"Then further until I was screaming in agony, just screaming non-stop and a trooper brought his boot down on my knee. I passed out. When I came to it was to agony in my knee and my foot was facing backwards."

Saria noticed his hands were shaking. She softly took one of his hands in hers. Sketched grabbed her fingers, then relaxed his grip. He swallowed and looked down, then leaned into Jester's solidness.

"Kix wasn't there. We didn't have a medic. A couple of weeks later, they came and got me again, saying they were going to straighten out my foot. I knew enough to be terrified. They cut a circle around my ankle, all the tendons there. They twisted my ankle outward until my foot was forward again. Then they kept on twisting, kept on twisting. Without supporting the knee either, so that was twisting back as well. It was only half-healed, so it shattered again when they turned it. I hit pain that I hadn't even contemplated before. Heard bone scraping bone in my knee. I offered them all the information I knew, they weren't asking questions. Each time I passed out, they waited for me. When that pain was intolerable they..." Sketch frowned and his eyebrows drew down, he pulled his hands to himself and gestured, "Ripped my foot upward so the sole of my foot was facing forward." He gave a sad laugh. "You'll see when you look."

She nodded, mentally cataloguing what was likely to have been broken and torn: hamstringing – the two large tendons in the back of the knee, quadriceps tendon, medial collateral ligament, patellar tendon, lateral collateral ligament, anterior cruciate ligament, posterior cruciate ligament. What she was likely to be able to repair: the two talofibular ligaments, the calcaneofibular, ligament, the two tibiofibular ligaments, the big tendon in the back of the ankle.

"I'd like to see your leg, now. If I may." He nodded and, with Jester's help made it to the chair by his cot.

"Did they break your ankle?" She asked as she knelt in front of him, her eyes taking in the damage of his leg, the way some muscles twisted wrong.

"No. Just the popping and twisting, but maybe it broke.  They didn't use their boots." Sketch replied. She nodded absently as her fingers explored his ankle.

Her fingers moved to his knee, gently stroking up the twisted muscles of his lower leg. They weren't right, shifting, unattached. She could feel the patella on the inside of his knee – where the medial collateral ligament should be, could feel the distal and lateral condyles too far from each other and from the femur to still be attached; an extra bone that might be from the head of the tibia. Something else, she had no idea what.

He was pale, after her examination, as he adjusted the warm towels on his leg. Jester brought the towels, and then brought them both a glass of cold, sweet juice. He stood at the little entryway between kitchen and where they were sitting, guarding their privacy.

Saria sat back on her haunches, looking up, into Sketch's face. She rarely seen such damage, and never intentionally inflicted. "You have a serious injury, Sketch. Your leg will never be the same as it was before the injury. Even with extensive surgery and a bacta tank you would never be the same."

Sketch nodded. He hadn't been optimistic. He stared into the glass of juice, watching the surface swirl, glisten, as he moved the glass.

Saria set her glass on the small table, tapping it with her fingers, staring into space, thinking. "A bacta tank merely provides healing of tissue. It is the surgery which corrects the actual damage. I can do the ankle myself." She looked at him, caught his eyes. "Here in fact. It was not shattered like the knee and is a matter of re-attaching or repairing the ligaments and muscles. The remainder, your knee, the muscles that attach to the various parts of the knee, would be a series of surgeries, Sketch. For your leg, the word 'extensive' doesn't begin to cover it." She shook her head. "I can't do your knee. That's beyond my expertise."

He blinked and his mouth dropped open. A look of hope crossed his face, and then his forehead wrinkled. "I have no means of paying."

"Let's make that a concern for later. The more immediate concern is this is not quick healing surgery. This is not something that you have the surgery, put on a bandage and you're healed in a few weeks." She looked into his amber-brown eyes. "Or a couple of months."

"What time frame would I be looking at, Saria?"

"A year and a half. And that's without any complications."

Sketch looked down at her and she smiled at his expression. He'd already decided; his only concern now was finding some way of paying. Jester sucked in a hissing breath, mentally calculating credits he had access to. He'd give everything he had for his brother to walk alongside him again.

"That's a long time." Saria continued. "The good news is that, done correctly, you'd have no pain almost immediately after surgery." She spoke softly. "I'm sorry I can't do the knee. I know that hurts so much more."

Sketch nodded and rubbed her hand softly. "I know."

"The 35 klick runs would take two years to materialize and you'd never have the speed you use to have." Saria laughed softly.

"Two hours," Sketch smiled.

"That fast?" she asked, suddenly brought to another matter entirely. Jester caught her eyes, nodded softly and looked terribly sad.

Sketch simply nodded. "That's the standard. These days, I'm a lot slower."

"You'd probably have a permanent limp." Saria took a drink of her juice. "However, your leg will be better than it is now, and you will adapt. Your recovery is more related to your brain's ability to adapt than your leg's ability to bend, flex, walk."

"I'll want to do the surgery. Surgeries. I don't know how I'll pay, but…" Sketch hesitated. Then his lips became firm. "That will get done, Saria. I promise you." She stood, noticed Jester nodding, looking at her.

"We'll discuss that later. For right now, though…" she smiled and pulled the long crutches from where Jester had set them. "Try these, Sketch."

Jester helped him stand and Saria adjusted the crutches to his height then showed him how to use them correctly. "I'm sure you can use the forearm crutches as well. You seem to have the arm and chest strength."

He grinned at her. "Maybe you'll find out when I give you a hug."

Saria blushed. "I want you to practice with both for the next day or so. For long term, the forearm crutches are usually better. The long crutches are easier to use. Stairs are a no go. Avoid slippery surfaces. Do not use the crutches in the early morning here. It's extremely slippery on the wet grass. Don't slouch on your crutches. That will pinch some nerves in your arm and hand." She gestured to his drawings and shook her head. "You don't want that."

"No, ma'am." He was shaking his head emphatically about that.

"For the first couple of days I'd like you to have someone with you. Make sure you keep your leg warm, don't overdo it."

He was one of Jester's brothers. Of course, he was going to overdo it. "And when you do overdo it …."

Sketch nodded with a grin. Jester laughed.

"I'll leave you enough pain medication for three days. Now go and have some fun." Sketch laughed, moved next to her and set both crutches in one hand; he put his arm around her and gave her the promised hug, bending his head into her neck. He did have the strength in his arms. "Thank you."

"Jester," she gasped, slightly out of breath.  "Would you help him practice?"

Jester smiled at her. "Yes, Saria. Thank you."

Saria, smiled, her heart content as watched the two brothers move out of the kitchen into the open back yard.

**Ahsoka Returns**

The night was silver-bright with both moons full. The stars were dim, at best, and it was late for the light bugs though a few still flickered. Down the hill Rex heard a few men still at the thermal pool. He smiled; he'd known that would be a popular choice of the men. The water was wonderfully warm, verging on too hot in some areas. Cut and Jester had found a cave with a narrow entrance on the property. The cave opened into a large galley of sand-covered soil with the hot water pool at one end. They'd opened up the entrance of the cave and diverted a nearby, cold-water creek towards the lower portion of the pool making a gradient of temperatures as well as a gradient of depth. It had been a lot of work and the first improvement Cut had made that wasn't necessary. The hot, turquoise water was an absolute luxury.

If Ahsoka arrived tonight then they'd have some more supplies to hand out to the men; razors, combs, nail clips, soap, shampoo, tooth wash. No one complained, but he'd seen several men rubbing their hands against the stubble of their chins, deciding to grow their hair for lack of any other option. Now they'd have the option, another small choice to make, and would appreciate the hot water of the pool when it came time to shave. Cut has said there was a downhill current at the west end of the pool.

If Ahsoka arrived tonight, they'd triple their cold storage and have plenty of protein, mostly in the form of nerf and bantha steaks as well as more eggs and blue milk. There were nunas on the farm, but not enough to supply for all the extra troopers. They wouldn't have to make a food run for several weeks.

If Ahsoka arrived tonight, that would be good news. It would mean there'd been no sign of Imperials in the sector. No one searching for escaped troopers. At the meeting of the first night, he had neither ordered nor requested any men for guard watch. He wanted them to learn, to think for themselves; though he and Cut were prepared for guard duty. Several men had come and, in various ways, volunteered. He'd learned that others had simply set up their own guards. It was habit, but by deciding, it also became choice. It was something he and Echo didn't have to worry about anymore.

If Ahsoka arrived tonight... Rex draped his head back against the tree with a smile. He missed her. Her voice, her ideas, the wonderful way she kissed him. He missed her smiles, her laugh, her serious look melting into something softer for him. If Ahsoka arrived tonight, he'd grab her and carry her to the bed in the cabin and ravage her lips with kisses. He'd run his hands over her body until she couldn't stand it and pushed him onto his back, mounting him. He made a soft noise in the back of this throat.

Echo chuckled and Rex opened one eye. "If I were still a captain…" he threatened.

"You wouldn't be waiting so eagerly for our wives to return," retorted Echo with a grin.

Rex sighed. "There is that." He took a moment to stretch his muscles so they didn't get stiff. He looked toward the farm, the barn. He could make out the faint glow of fire at Jester's camp. "We did good, Echo."

"I'm still amazed, Rex. I don't even want to talk about it so I don't jinx it." Echo's brows drew down in worry, silently asking Rex.

"Understood, brother." For a moment all was quiet and Rex realized the last men must have left the pool. He glanced toward the house and the barn. The soft yellow lights were turned off. Everyone was asleep. He smiled. Sketch was in there, his leg bundled against a warm wall.

"Did you see Sketch's face?" he asked Echo with a smile.

"Yes, a lot of different expressions." Rex heard the smile in Echo's voice. "I think he was worried we'd toss him out mid-space as soon as we saw his leg wasn't fixable." Rex heard a sigh from Echo, and interpreted it as concern for Sketch then Echo chuckled. "Did you see the way Suu and the girls were cosseting him?"

Rex chuckled. "And Sula and Saoha, giving him a hug or kiss, stroking his shoulder anytime they walked by. Letting him hold the baby." His voice softened as he bit his lips. He couldn't do that; he still had those fears of losing Barin.

"At the meeting you were talking," continued Echo. "But when you said 'family', his face just relaxed into a big smile. He's still worried, but now it's not about being discarded, it's more about what he can do for his family. I think he'll stay on Saleucami."

"It's early yet, Echo. I wouldn't go making any bets." He saw an unusual light in the sky and pointed it out for Echo. "Do you think that's the ship?" By the time he finished the sentence they both knew it was and were standing, shaking the leaves and grass off themselves. By its flight path, they knew it was safe.

The ship's doorway opened. Rex and Echo moved toward it, even as they saw the shadows of their wives in the ship's light. Rex swallowed. Ahsoka was beautiful, Aureki was beautiful. He was an enormously lucky man to have two wonderful wives. He glanced towards Echo who also smiled for the women and then glanced towards Rex.

"We are two of the luckiest men in Outer Rim."

Echo nodded with his own answering grin. By chance Echo reached Ahsoka and grabbed her with a laugh and a kiss.

Rex grabbed Aureki and kissed her deeply, closed his eyes and ran his face into her neck and lekku. She always smelled so wonderfully spicy-sweet. He growled softly as she nuzzled his ears. Tonight he'd had Ahsoka in his thoughts, but he wouldn't be disappointed if Echo called first husband rights. Rex had been right in that his heart could grow. He took another deep sniff. There was a difference.

"Is second wife wearing perfume?" he asked. That was unusual for most Togruta.

"Do you like my scent?" she asked softly.

He opened his eyes, then closed them and, again, took a deep inhale at the junction of her neck, her shoulder, her lekku.

"It's softer." He said. "Less spicy. More like Ahsoka." That should have told him. Rex let himself drift into that scent. He felt protective. Aureki was his in a way that even Ahsoka could never be. Aureki _needed_ him. "Yes, Aureki, I like it. What is it?"

"Your child." She answered softly. He froze and felt the need to push her away, away from the invisible blood on his hands, push her away to protect her from him, his past. She had loosened her hands, for him to do so, if he wished. He forced his arm to keep hold of her, forced his fingers to caress her face but his smile was unforced. His fingers trembled but havingseen the effect of his nightmares and knowing their cause, she understood.

"I am happy, Aureki. Do not let my fear make you think I'm not."

"I know you are." She softly touched his face. "Ahsoka has felt this child to be a healthy girl." She laughed softly. "I am happy, Rex. I am married to stubborn, headblind warriors, I have a dearly loved sister, I have a son of her body and I will have a daughter of my own body and I am happy beyond words."

Aureki glowed with happiness and Rex realized he should have known when he saw her. "You are beautiful, Aureki. More beautiful here in the moonlight than I have ever seen you." Again, he ran his nose along her neck, breathing in that perfume, memorizing it. Knowing it for what it was. The changes his child was making to her body.

He picked her up and carried her back into the ship, where his family would be staying while on Saleucami. He loved those words, 'his family'. This was the core of his family, surrounded by others, Fives, Jester, Sula, Saoha, the unnamed infant, Cut and Suu, Shaeeah, Jek. They, in turn, surrounded by his larger family of brothers. He shot a look toward Echo who had a dazed, pleased look on his face.

"So, first wife has told you that second wife is having second husband's child?" Sometimes Rex preferred using the formal kin titles of Shili. It was like a protective talisman, as if the universe could not identify 'Rex' with second husband, and could not punish his family for Rex's transgressions in the Jedi Tower.

Echo simply grinned, nodded and picked up a protesting Ahsoka in his arms. "Stop that first wife," he mock-threatened. "Or there'll be no kisses until tomorrow."

Rex laughed. "It is tomorrow, Echo."

"It is?" said Echo as he turned a wicked grin to Ahsoka. "Then I'd better start kissing." He suited action to word and Ahsoka ceased all protestation.

Rex watched them, Aureki in his arms. He could feel himself getting hard as he watched his brother kiss their wife. Was this what it felt like when two brothers shared? He could tell Ahsoka enjoyed Echo's kisses, could tell Echo was getting aroused from how those kisses changed, from his grip on her body. He didn't feel even the slightest twitch of jealousy as Echo kissed the first woman both men had ever loved. He could enjoy the pleasure in her face as Echo nuzzled her; as though it were pleasure Rex were giving her.

He looked at Aureki with a smile. "Is that what you see when Ahsoka kisses us? Do you take pleasure when she gives us pleasure? Have you no jealousy?" His voice was soft in wonderment.

She looked into his eyes and leaned forward to kiss his cheek. "Rex, what is jealousy?" she asked softly. He laughed and shook his head. "Not tonight. No philosophical discussions tonight. To bed, my wife."

Before he fell asleep, Rex moved into the galley, contented and relaxed. It wasn't long before Echo joined him, a smile on his face. Silently, they moved into their cabins, Rex with Ahsoka, Echo with Aureki. It pained him, especially tonight when he would have liked to cradle her in his arms. But he wouldn't chance injuring Aureki with his reaction to his night terrors. He could kill her before he woke and that wasn't a danger with Force-sensitive, Jedi-trained Ahsoka.

**Fourth Morning**

Rex stretched with a smile and a pleased, relaxed body. He rolled to find Ahsoka at his side with her own eyes opened and a purr of early morning relaxation in her throat. He took her in his arms and pulled her next to his body.

"I am so lucky, Ahsoka." He whispered. "So lucky to have married you and Aureki. So lucky to have Echo as my brother, Barin as my son. So lucky to have two children coming to our family." He put his head on hers, rubbed her lekku with his cheek. "Is there a price for all this good fortune? Something I'll have to pay?"

"Whatever price there is, you have paid it," she said. "You have paid it in sorrow and pain. You have paid it in every decision you made, in every decision you will ever make. You have paid it in nightmares and you have paid it in what you have given to others."

He nodded, kissed her. She moved closer, pressed her pelvis against him, her breasts against his chest. Her eyes were half-closed in lust as she pressed her lips against his, sucking on his lower lip, flicking her tongue softly between his lips. He needed no further encouragement. He groaned in lust as his hands flowed down her back, cupped her cheeks; he held her against him and rolled onto his back with her on him.

"Eager, this morning, Rex?" She asked huskily.

Her words were intoxicating and he groaned again. "Yes, Ahsoka. I'm eager." He trembled with lust as she touched him with her hand then mounted him. "You feel so good, my wife, my love. Ahsoka," he whispered. He'd never been so hard, so wanting her, so drowning in her body, so needful of her flesh. He bit his lip; already he was rocking back, growling deep in his throat, in ecstasy. "Ahsoka." It was a harsh whisper ripped from his throat and he closed his eyes as that heaven engulfed him.

He could feel her breath, soft on his face. He opened his eyes, his breathing still rapid. "I'm sorry, Ahsoka. I don't know I would be so fast."

"It was very intoxicating, Rex. Please don't be sorry. I liked it."

"But you didn't come."

She tilted her head. "In a way, I'm glad I didn't."

Rex frowned. "Why?"

"I would have missed it." She said, her voice soft and low and loving.

Rex thought about that for a moment, then shook his head. "Have I ever mentioned that females are the strangest creatures I have ever had the good fortune to come across?" He grinned and kissed her. "I don't think I could manage again for a few minutes, but would you like to try?"

"Tonight, Rex. We have meetings, chores. Echo already stuck his head in and asked if we wanted breakfast in bed." She answered with a kiss on his bare shoulder.

"Echo came in?" Rex said with shock. "I didn't wake up?"

Ahsoka shook her head. "If you hadn't woken up in such…" her eyes glittered with her smile, "an eager mood, I was going to take you down to the med barn. You've never slept through anyone speaking. Especially in a whisper." Her eyes narrowed. "When was the last time you got any sleep?"

She frowned as he didn't answer; his eyes upward as he tried to count the days. She was pulling on the cotton pants and sleeveless shirt she wore on Shili. Her own pregnancy, by Echo, was only a barely noticed softness in her belly. He smiled, got up and started dressing, stopping frequently to kiss her wherever he could reach.

There was always caf at the back of the house. But today there was more than just the caf. Shaeeah and Numa were laughing as they piled heaps of fluffy, golden egg on each man's plate. Suu and Aureki were scrambling the eggs and toasting home-made bread slices on a metal plate over an open fire and Rex's nose itched at the delicious scent. Suu and Aureki had never met before, but they laughed, talked and served food as if they'd been doing it together for years. Two of his brothers, Checkout and Backup, both gunship pilots, were helping with the eggs, stirring them in bowls.

Jek and Fives, laughing, were playing with Barin and Keeli who ran, hiding behind men and climbing over their laps. Rex's face seemed to blaze in wonderment at his son who saw him and came running for a hug. Rex bent to his knees for his son.

"Look da, they're like you and Echo." Barin laughed, gave Rex a quick grasp around his neck then ran back to the game.

Sula was nursing the infant, a shawl over her shoulder and the baby's head to avoid the men's embarrassment. Sitting next to her was Saoha; enticing two of the wounded, the battered Riposte and Kaver, his arm in a sling, to eat.

Cody, his plate empty, a cup of caf warming his hands, was talking with Cut and Echo. They motioned him over. Ahsoka sat near Cody, her face somber as she touched his wrist with the double-wrapped beads around it.

"Barriss?" she asked softly and he nodded, his eyes sad. She gave him a quick hug. "I am so sorry."

"We've already got some people interested in getting debriefed, Rex," said Cut. "Cody says he'll probably finish you today so shall we meet tonight at the house?"

"What about Sketch?" Rex really didn't mind if Sketch heard their thoughts. They'd already determined that if any man asked, he could sit at their meetings. All it would tell them was how uncertain the entire process was. But he didn't want someone there _until_ he had asked.

"Jester and some others are going to take him to the pool this evening. He's still getting use to those crutches Saria got him, but if there's any problem, Kix will be there."

Rex looked out over the men. "I don't see him. Or Jester."

"He was in the house," replied Cut. "I think he overdid it yesterday. Jester's around, he was first at breakfast." Cut took a drink of his caf. "Col is finishing up his physical today and Sula will be talking to him this afternoon." Cut grinned. "I don't think he's going to have any trouble passing either of those."

Echo grinned. "He's got his reasons. They were good enough for me so I traded my debrief. Chopper's already cleared on his physical. First one to ask."

Fives sat down by Echo, laughing and slightly out of breath after chasing Keeli, Barin and Jek. He held the squirming toddler in his lap and Rex felt a moment's jealousy. "Chopper asked if he could have my debrief. Since he asked…." Fives shrugged, letting the sentence fade.

Rex nodded. They'd decided to encourage asking, to encouraging making decisions, to encourage questioning, that anything of that nature would be rewarded as best as possible. He didn't know if Chopper could pass the psyc. "I haven't had a chance to talk to Chopper since the escape. I'd like to."

Echo laughed softly as he chewed some toast. "You haven't had the time to do _most_ of what you have been doing, Rex. I've held you down and convinced you that you, me, everyone should be debriefed. I've convinced you that this should be family, not just the troopers. So, now I'm going to convince you that you will be going to the thermal pool tonight with me, Ahsoka, Aureki, and Barin. Our slot is right after Kix and Sketch. The meeting will not go on that long."

"That's just big, bad, ARC-training talk," Rex laughed. "Trying to convince me to do something I've already decided on. I'll be there."

"No work," warned Echo.

Rex shrugged. Echo sighed and rolled his eyes. "Ok, a little work."

Ahsoka nudged Rex in the ribs softly and he glanced up to see Chopper coming to breakfast. Most of the scars on his face had faded, but in prison, some had been cruelly re-cut and were still red, particularly the ones on his face. He had a slight smile on his face and he was growing his hair. It was barely beyond stubble, but it was more than the growth of a week so it was something he had decided in prison. He strode to Boil's side and put a hand on his shoulder, spoke a few words to that small group. He grinned and waved to Jek who waved back as he chased Barin. He took his plate to the fire where Aureki served him some scrambled eggs. Chopper spoke with her for a few seconds, saying something to make her smile and Suu laugh. He looked around and, noticing their group, made his way over to them. For a moment he stood, undecided, then swiftly sat next to Ahsoka and began eating his eggs.

Rex was surprised and his eyebrows rose in question. Most of the troopers considered them a command group and didn't interrupt them. He noted that Ahsoka's lips twitched in amusement.

"Morning, Chopper," said Echo.

"Morning, Echo. Morning all," nodded Chopper, keeping his head down so he _wouldn't_ see any unspoken message to leave. "Mmm, these eggs are great. And the toast... spectacular. Cut, I have to say, you'll never get rid of us if you keep feeding us this well."

"The more the merrier, that's what I say," Cut had a soft grin as he watched the trooper quickly eat his eggs.

"I thought it was 'to each his own', Cut," joked Rex of so long ago.

"I say a lot of things," Cut replied with a smile. "Whatever fits the situation."

Echo brought them back to business. "I think Col will be the first to ask to leave. He wants to go to Dantooine." Echo turned to Chopper. "What about you, Chopper? You seem to be wanting to get your debrief done pretty quick."

Chopper looked up, if they had wanted him to leave, they would have said so by now, and smiled. "Yeah, I'm looking for a planet where beautiful women outnumber the men a thousand to one. Haven't found it yet, so I'll be sticking around for a time." He took a last bite of egg then wiped his plate clean with the toast. "Besides, no telling how many times I'll have to go through psyc, so I might as well get started early."

Ahsoka looked at him. "Just once, I think, Chopper."

He blushed, dropped his head, embarrassed for an instant, looked for something to divert them and held up his plate. "I picked this plate because it has that blue rim." He smiled at Rex. "The same blue as the 501st colors. I always did like that blue."

"Me too, Chopper," smiled Rex.

Chopper looked them over, suddenly serious. "When I'm cleared, I want to be included in your meetings. I want to be able to tell the men what you're thinking about, how things are going. Cody, you'll understand. In prison they kept information from us. They'd lie about something, about almost everything. It made us weak. I don't think it’s right to do that to our brothers." He paused. "If you don't include me, I'll do my best to find out what's going on. I will become a nuisance, I'm sure."

Cody chuckled. "Can't have that, can we?" He glanced up. Suu was there, her apron tossed over her shoulder.

"Aureki and the girls have everything under control. Our two gunship pilots now know not to try to juggle eggs." Cody's eyebrows rose and Suu smiled. So that's why Checkout and Backup had been helping.

Rex sighed. "Yes on joining us, Chopper. Starting now, no need for being cleared. None of us have a problem with that."

Chopper leaned back, surprised at not having to back up his thoughts. He'd prepared a good argument. "Oh."

"But, Chopper," Ahsoka began. "We don't want you telling everyone everything. Part of learning to deal with civilian life is uncertainty. It's also learning to make decisions, ask questions. We want them to asked questions. And they won't ask if you're telling them everything."

Chopper brows drew into a frown.

Suu spoke up. "Chopper, you picked your plate because of the blue. If you can find five more men who picked their plate for a reason instead of picking the nearest one, you can tell them everything you want out of the meetings."

He looked at her face, glanced around to everyone one. She seemed as in command as Cody or Rex. No one appeared to gainsay or negate her words. He remembered how she had threatened Checkout and Backup with their own cooking. Chopper nodded. "If I find five, I can tell all the men or just the ones I find."

Suu smiled. "All the men, if you prefer. We will leave it to your discretion."

He looked hard at her, and then shook his head. "Alright. I've lost already, haven't I? You tell me. You were watching, weren't you? Besides me, how many picked instead of just taking what was next?"

"You. Sketch, but he was encouraged by Shaeeah and Numa asking him for his choices. Kaver. He was there when Numa and Shaeeah were discussing the choice for Sketch. He seemed struck by lightning and lifted five plates to take the sixth. It didn't seem as though he were taking a particular plate, rather that he was making a choice to make a choice." She sat next to Cut, leaned against him as his arm came around her. "You would have asked better for the bedrolls. Several men chose instead of taking the next in line. They chose by feel, by running their hands over the side of the blankets." She nodded. "Like you did, though you were the only one to pull out three and check the patterns."

He got a sorrowful look on his face. "Are we that broken? Are we that far from being men?" he asked softly.

Suu looked at him with a kind expression on her face. "No. Not far at all." Her lips quivered. "Ask Rex or Echo or even my own dear Cut why they chose the plate they did."

Chopper looked at Rex who laughed. "Yes, Chopper, I picked it up because it was on top. I didn't make a conscious choice any more than most everyone here."

Cut chuckled, nodding. "Same."

"Plates are nothing, Chopper." Suu continued. "It is the decision that is important. Consciously deliberating and making a choice. You chose the blue _because_ you like the color. One man wanted purple, I could tell by the way he looked at a particular plate. Yet he took the one on top. He did not even make the decision to take to one on top. He simply took it from habit. Kaver did not take a plate he wanted, merely one that was different from the norm. Experimenting, I think, to make sure the sky would not fall if he made a decision."

Chopper nodded, his brows furrowed as he thought. "I think I understand what you're trying to do. I don't think it will work. We're clones. We work best with orders. We'll … flounder … without directions." He shook his head.

"We're not going for best, Chopper. Perfection is only something to aim at. We're going for practicality." Cody's voice was firm, his command voice.

"And if that doesn't happen, for some of the men?" Chopper asked.

"This is their home," smiled Cut. "For the men who chose not to leave, for the men who make no choice. Even for the men who do leave. I want them to know they can come back."

Chopper ducked his head, not wanting them to see his tears. He felt a hand on his shoulder and glanced up to see Suu offering comfort. "I'm crying for your kindness." He said.

"As for telling the others," she touched his shoulder. "That is at your discretion. That will always be at your discretion."

Chopper frowned, suddenly aware, suddenly with a glimmer of what this all meant. "Thank you."

**Saria**

It was a beautiful morning. The morning was cool but would warm in the mild sunlight that bathed Saleucami. Saria leaned against the med barn door with a scarf over her shoulders. It almost sounded like a party in the back yard. She smiled.

Riposte, Kaver and Edge had gone to breakfast. Dare had gone with them, his eyes forlorn. He'd already had his breakfast, some nutritionally adequate protein liquid, but he had asked if he could have caf and Saria told him he could have a single cup today. He had smelled Kayl's breakfast when Edge brought it in.

Saria caught sight of Jester. He was running to the house in that graceful lope, an alert expression on his face. Seeing her at the med barn door, he gave her a wave as he took the porch steps in a single leap. She smiled and gave him a wave back.

"Kix, I'll be checking on Sketch. I suspect he overdid it yesterday." Saria hung the scarf on one of the wooden pegs by the door and turned to gather a few things she'd need.

Kix laughed. "That's a sure thing." He picked up Kayl's empty plate with the fork and set them on the table also. He had a few flimsi pages in his hand. "Col will be coming for his physical results. Chopper's was good yesterday and Col's is very similar; both following what I would have calculated after a long confinement. A few deficiencies that will correct themselves with proper diet, but I suspect that will be about it for most of the men."

"That's good. I'm sure most of the men will be doing the physical first." Saria pulled her kit together. "Kayl can go out when Edge comes back. Riposte can help with the cot. Physically, he's doing fine."

"Same for Dare?" Kit asked. "I think he'll want to go out and explore camp also."

"Make sure he's with someone who'll keep an eye on him. Edge would be best. Dare only thinks he's fine. Surgery like that takes a lot out of you and, after what's happened to him, I do _not_ want him passing out and hitting the ground." She moved out of the barn to the house.

Sketch hadn't gotten out of his cot. He had his forearm over his eyes. "I'll be up in just a moment," he was saying as Saria entered the house.

Jester was sitting in the chair by the cot, a little worried. He glanced up to see Saria. He gave her a smile; tentative, hesitant, questioning. She smiled back softly, her eyes going to Sketch.

"Told you she'd be here, Sketch. Do you want him sitting, Saria or as is." Jester touched Sketch on his shoulder and Sketch moved his forearm to look at her. He actually had the grace to blush.

"For the moment, as is. Jester, will you get…"

"Hot towels? Already on his leg."

Saria nodded absently as her attention moved to Sketch.

Jester watched her. She was always there for her patients. She'd been there for him; when he had nightmares, when he remembered bad times like the Temple, when only her presence made everything all right. They ha'd talked about her training with Chymdura and he had agreed. He'd thought it was a great idea. There'd been no mention of sharing then.

"Good. Any muscle spasms, Sketch." Her voice was warm and she smiled. Jester remember when she always been smiling at him. Laughing or turning her sparkling green eyes in his direction with some private joke they shared. He shoved that down into his heart.

Embarrassed, Sketch nodded. "Two. But not bad." Jester frowned. They'd been bad enough that Sketch had grabbed Jester's arm, leaving bruises, bad enough that Sketch had leaned, pale and shaking, against a tree.

She smiled, her eyes crinkling. "Worth it?"

Sketch smiled. "Yes. I really appreciate the crutches. It hurts but no worse than the regular hurting. I can get around. And that's wonderful."

"What kind of hurt?" she asked, the smile fading into thought.

"Right now? Overdoing it." He grinned wryly and ducked his head, embarrassed.

"Are you going to overdo it again?" she asked, reaching out an arm to help him sit up. He took it and, with Jester's help, sat on the cot. Her hands took his leg and gently moved it off the cot as he sat. He blushed, winced, and pulled a coverlet over him.

"Probably." He smiled as he ducked his head. Jester chuckled and Saria laughed. Her fingers traced over his leg; the crooked knee, the twisted muscles, the scars, the upturned foot. She glanced at his face and caught a look of profound sadness as he contemplated his leg. The mourning of a man for something he would never have again.

"Kix tells me you're going to the thermal pool tonight. Have a good time. And I'll see you tomorrow morning. With a lecture I've been saving up."

Sketch laughed.

Jester smiled as he grabbed Jester's clothes to help him dress. Maybe he could have shared if she'd chosen his brother. Maybe he could have learned to share if she'd chosen Sketch.

Saria stood and went into the kitchen so Sketch could dress in privacy. Rex was there and Saria stiffened. He gave her a nod.

"I was in a rotten mood yesterday." He said as apology, pouring a glass of juice. "I'd like to continue that conversation. I promise to be more civil. He handed her the glass then poured one for himself, leaning against the sink counter

"I take it Ahsoka and Aureki arrived." She asked.

He looked down, an embarrassed smile playing around his lips. He nodded. "In the wee hours of morning. All news is good; no sign of Imperials and we're fully stocked for several weeks."

"It would explain your much better mood." She smiled. "You've been doing an enormous amount of work, Rex. I knew it was mostly lack of sleep talking. I'm sorry I met your temper with my own."

She took another sip as Jester and Sketch came into the kitchen on the way out back, where there were no steps. Sketch was laughing as he stiffly swung his body on the crutches. Rex moved aside for them with a hand on Sketch's shoulder, then a pat on Jester's back. Sketch stopped in front of Saria, gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and then continued out the door. Jester, right behind him, quickly smiled at her.

"That was kind of you, Saria. The crutches, checking on him today. I heard that you offered surgery." Rex said.

She shrugged a shoulder. "That's the reason I went into medicine." She looked at him. "And it's not kindness. It's power. It's knowing that I can do that; bring that kind of expression to someone's face." She took a sip of the juice he'd given her. "Sketch said he like to rebuild his stamina and get use to the crutches before I do the surgery on his ankle. Probably next week. The knee," she shook her head. "I can't do. Jester volunteered his house for Sketch's comfort, if he wants and there's a small room there suitable for the operation." She frowned then glanced at the door.  "You saw him, Rex. Jester's not broken. He just doesn't care about me." She finished the juice. "I just wish he hadn't…" she frowned. "I don't know." Soft tears rolled down her cheeks. "Maybe if he'd just said he was visiting Cass instead of running, I could have accepted that and we could have gone separate ways without this mess. It would have broken my heart, but it wouldn't have left hope alive."

"What makes you think he lied about the running? That's a common form of relaxation for us. It would be one of the first things we'd do." He hadn't recognized in his anger that she'd been hurt as well. He recognized it now.

"Thirty-five klicks in two hours? He'd say 35 clicks and then he'd be back in two hours. That's too fast for that distance, but two hours is just enough time to visit Cass for a good time and return home."

"I thought you said that earlier, but I was too angry to hear it." Rex scratched his cheek. "We're clone troopers, human but slightly different, Saria. Different percentage of muscle for one. If there was anyone in my company who _wasn't_ doing 35 klicks in less than two hours, I'd send him to med unit to check what was wrong with him. And that's in armor with gear."

He could see she was considering this. She bowed her head. "Sketch said the same. Boil said he ran also. I'll accept that, sometimes at least, Jester was out on a run for those two hours. But that doesn't explain why he went to bed Cass and he admits that. It doesn't explain why he thinks I was having an affair with Dr. Chymdura."

"I can't think of anything either. All I do know is that Jester doesn't lie and Jester doesn't share."

She sighed softly, rinsing out her glass and setting it in the sink. She leaned against the counter facing him. "I don't know Rex. Giving Sketch the crutches has at least let me talk to Jester, if only obliquely. He said he doesn't want to give up on friendship, so there's that at least."

"I wouldn't want to give up on your friendship, either, Saria."

She sniffed back a tear and took the step into his arms. "Me either, Rex. You have all become very important in my life."

He hugged her, forgiven and forgiving, tucked his head into the juncture of neck and shoulder as she laid her head against his chest. She had a faint perfume, the perfume of her own skin. Rex smiled. She smelled good, like Ahsoka, like Aureki. Rex stiffened and pulled her away from him. His eyes were wide.

"You're pregnant." His voice was shocked surprise.

She stared at him, her eyes wide. "How did…?" Then she started laughing. After a few seconds, she crumpled into crying. He pulled her into his arms and sat on the bench of the table with a dazed and troubled expression on his face.

**Outprocessing I - Col**

Col sat on a stool next to Kayl's cot in the med unit barn telling him about the eopies, the delicious bread and soup from the first night, the way the wind made music through the trees. He had Kayl smiling, eager to get better and leave the barn's confinement. Kayl said that Edge would be helping him out later, that Saria and Kix had promised he could go outside today.

Col turned to find Kix leaning against the door, listening with a smile. He jumped up, suddenly nervous. He didn't have doubts about his physical; not too many anyway. It was why he had started with the physical. He'd been the second man to schedule a physical and had seen Kix yesterday for some preliminary tests. Chopper had been the only one before him and had walked out with a grin and thumbs up at Col as Col walked in. Col realized they'd all been trained to follow steps in a given order, but the order was sometimes arbitrary. He wondered who'd told Chopper. Then again, Chopper had been different ever since Col had met him in prison.

"Come on in, Col." Kix lead him into the small stall-turned-office. There was no desk, simply two chairs on the same side of a longish table. Kix sat, gestured to the seat next to him. That was unusual. In previous medical assessments the trooper stood. Col shrugged. That had been GAR, Imperial Army or prison.

Col sat next to Kix, pulling the chair up to the table with his hand. Kix set the data pad on the table so both he and Col could see it.

"You're in pretty good health, Col, for everything that we've been through. So I'll tell you right now, you've passed the physical."

Col smiled and took a deep breath, relieved. That hadn't been hard. Col then set his flimsi and stylus on the table.

Kix glanced at it, then at Col in curiosity.

"It's my plan, and what I have to do." Col explained. He held the page up for Kix. It was divided into three small and one larger rectangle labeled: 'Phys', 'Psyc', 'Dbrf' and 'Future'. There were a lot of notes under 'Future'.

"Good idea. Especially for the debrief, I suspect," nodded Kix. "What you have to do for physical is simple. Eat more, exercise more. How's that?"

Col laughed. "That's it?"

Kix nodded. "You're got some borderline deficiencies, I suspect everyone does. Food in prison wasn't quality."

"Anything in particular?"

"Protein, for a start. Your muscle mass has decreased substantially. Exercise will help that as well. Sunlight. There wasn't much in prison and Saleucami isn't a very beneficial place for vitD. Make sure to get at least some sunlight five days a week while you're here. Good diet should fill in the rest." Kix watched Col note this on his flimsi.

"That shouldn't be a problem if they keep feeding us like they have been." smiled Col as he finished writing. "Those goldenfruit are absolutely wonderful and the eggs are," he grinned at Kix. "Almost orgasmic."

"I'll agree with you there." Kix smiled and glanced down at the table. "Orgasmic is something one of the women will be asking you, Col. If you can function sexually. There's nothing physically wrong with you."

Col chuckled. "I'm pretty sure I can manage. Little brother took an interest in Sula when we escaped."

"Sula?" Kix asked. Col blushed and nodded.

"When Fives carried her into the cabin, I wanted to be him so much. I was hard through most of that trip." He paused. "I have, I hope, someone on Dantooine, but it's been a long time." Col set the holovid on the table and flicked it to life. Ehveen, lovely in pregnancy.

"Maybe I've been watching it too long." Col joked softly, seeing those beautiful curved lines of her pregnancy. "Boil took it out of property and brought it here. I bawled like a baby to see it again."

Kix nodded. "I think you'll be getting a 'go' from psyc as well, then. You've got plans, hope, but you're not set on it being what it used to be. All those take seeing reality as it is, being able to change."

"Thanks, Kix."

He was one third done.

**Outprocessing II - Col**

Col swallowed hard. She was beautiful, even without the ball of pregnancy in her belly. Little brother was certainly interested and there wasn't much Col could do to hide that. She caught his interest, smiled softly and nodded.

"I guess I don't need to ask you that question." Her voice was softly velvety with a hint of huskiness. It flowed over Col like warm honey, relaxing him. He knew that was part of her being Zeltron; she let him see that and he appreciated her openness. He was pretty sure she could do this without his knowledge.

"No, ma'am." Col blushed.

"Please, call me Sula." He nodded and she continued. "Cut mentioned that you actually had plans beyond Saleucami."

"Yes, ma'am. Sula." He corrected himself. "I'd like to get back to Dantooine. There's a woman there. I thought I loved her more than anything, but I was wrong then. Now, I know I love her more than anything else I have. I want to go back to see if she..." He scratched his head with his fingers, brushed back hair that he was letting grow longer, trying to voice what he wanted. "I want to go back there to see if I have a future with her. With my child."

"And if you don't? What if she'd continued on with her life, married someone else or has died in childbirth. What if you can no longer find her?"

Col was silent. He'd given a brief, very brief, consideration to not being able to see her again. "I don't know. If she's moved on, then at least I can tell her what she meant to me, why I deserted her. I can apologize. Maybe meet my child. Maybe she'll allow me to be part of my child's life. I can work, help support her if necessary. That would be something." His lips twisted and he looked down at the floor. "I don't want her to be dead. Even if I can't find her, I should be able to find out what happened to her." He smiled at Sula, "Ehveen has family and they were pretty accepting of me. They knew I was a clone and that didn't matter to them. I don't think they'd all be dead unless the Imperials..." His lips tightened. "Did they? Was Dantooine attacked by the Imperial Stormtroopers? They never told us anything in prison."

"I do not believe so. If so, it has been kept amazingly secret."

Col relaxed. "Then probably not. It's difficult to keep a planetary invasion quiet." He paused, glanced down at his flimsi, his notes, and the single little symbol that meant "what if".

"If there's nothing on Dantooine left for me. I don't know. Maybe make my way back here to be with family. Maybe stay on Dantooine and work. It's agricultural for the most part. A strong back, some minor mechanical knowledge, are all that's needed and I've got those. Maybe partner up if anyone else is interested in Dantooine." He nodded to himself. "I think I'll put a notice up telling people to talk to me about Dantooine. It's a good place."

Sula nodded softly. "You're cleared."

"What? Already? But you haven't done a profile or anything." Col suddenly realized he shouldn't have said anything to jinx his good fortune. He bit his lip. Now, they might keep him.

She chuckled and that warmth was like sunlight in his soul. "You have hope. You have plans. You have contingency. You know that it will be hard work. You know that you have apologies to make and you have an understanding of what uncertainty will take out of you. You can function in the society to which you plan to go. You have consideration for other people. Is there anything else?"

Col thought about that, his brows furrowing. Then he smiled. "I guess not." Thank you, Sula."

They spoke a bit more. He asked about her baby girl, about children in general. She suggested he ask Suu, play with the younglings, and help with Keeli and the infant. When he left, he felt hopeful and clean.

Two thirds done, and in the same day. Col didn't know how long he'd have to wait for a debrief. Currently he was about tenth, fifth after Cody finished with the first deserters. He trotted over to the side of the house where schedules were tacked up, to put up his own notice about Dantooine.

There were two new lists and they must have been newly posted because only three men were reading them.

"Alright! Look, Scythe made it." Dub rejoiced, pointing it out to Djinn. "So did Jjeck and Rhys. Boil says they escaped by themselves." His fingers touched the asterisked names. "How did they do that?"

Djinn pointed out another name on the escapees list. "Sinker? I thought they took him out and busted his head." The thought that Sinker had escaped brought a smile to his lips.

"Told you he was hard-headed," smirked Dub, as he continued reading.

Baffle was looking at the longer list, his body in respectful parade rest, his lips moving as he recited names to himself. Col knew that no one would call the names of the dead aloud. Every man would want to read that list for themselves. They would want to mourn quietly, perhaps add a name to their daily remembrance.

Col checked the debrief list and sighed. Still tenth. He wondered how long it would take before he even started his debrief. He took one of the little plascards and the attached stylus. He didn't ponder long over his words before he had them.

_Interested in Dantooine?_

_Been there, going back._

_See me if you have questions._

_Col, Cut's Camp._

** Saria **

Rex held her in his arms as she cried, rocking her. He was still unsure what to do about crying women. Ahsoka and Aureki so rarely cried. He'd never seen Aureki cry and he hadn't seen Ahsoka cry except back on the _Resolute_ during the war. He seemed to be doing all right with Saria. She had stopped crying, stopped those deep, gulping sobs, and was now breathing deep and even, her eyes were closed.

Rex suddenly realized she was asleep. He smiled and held her a bit closer to his chest. Saria had been doing a lot in the last few days. Both Kayl and Dare's surgeries had been long and intensive. That kind of concentration was exhausting. She had set up the med barn, including a sterile area, before the brothers had arrived. She'd been sharing post-op watch with Kix and Etch. There'd been some problem in her relationship with Jester – no matter whose fault that was. No wonder she was asleep, she was probably still exhausted. The problem was she was asleep in his arms and he had debriefing with Cody.

He stood, holding her in his arms as he looked around, then mentally shrugged and walked through the kitchen, out the door into the back yard. It was morning, breakfast over, and the back yard was empty except for Chopper.

"Two aren't enough?" Chopper asked with a grin that stretched into one of his facial scars, as he scrapped the steel cooking plate.

Rex chuckled. He knew most of the troopers envied him and Echo their wives; envied Fives, envied Cut. Chopper, at least, looked at it with humor. "Actually, I'd like to find her a comfortable place out here. Will you get a blanket?" Chopper nodded, wiped his hands on the towel over his shoulder, and went into the house. Rex looked around for a good spot, found one on a slight slope, near a tree. Chopper came out with two blankets and a pillow.

"Thought she might like something to curl up with," he mumbled as he straightened the blanket on the ground. Rex laid her down and Chopper covered her with the second blanket, then he pushed the pillow under her arm. She murmured and clenched the pillow closer.

"I'll keep an eye on her," said Chopper, as he moved back to finish cleaning the steel. "I'm almost done with this."

"Thanks," replied Rex as he started toward the barn, then turned around. "She went to sleep crying. I don't know how she'll wake up."

Chopper nodded. "Are you going to tell Kix where she is?"

"Yes. I don't think she had much planned today, but he would know."

"If so, you can tell him where she's napping. I'll make sure no one bothers her other than med." Chopper glanced at the sleeping figure.

Rex nodded as he strode towards the barn. "Only med," he warned. "Not even Jester."

Choppers eyebrows rose in surprise, then he gazed at the sleeping figure in contemplation.

Chopper had banked the fire pit, leaving glowing coals surrounded by the stone embankment. The steel plate was scrapped, scrubbed, and sanded clean, ready for Suu's culinary magic late in the afternoon. Now he was sitting next to her blanket. He'd told Rex he'd watch Saria, he never said how close.

Chopper frowned, puckered his face deep into thought. She was a small woman with delicate, capable hands. Her hair was a sandy blonde. He stared at her face, wondering what color her eyes would be when they opened. He'd like a woman like that.

He laughed softly as he looked at the sky, and then shook his head. He'd like a woman like … anything. Eye color didn't matter. Hair color didn't matter. Skin color, tiny or larger, a woman who giggled softly or one who laughed loudly, talkative or quiet. None of that mattered. Just so she liked him. Just so she'd hug him close, kiss him, run her fingers on his scarred face and body without revulsion. Chopper sighed. There'd never be a woman for him. He looked at Saria. Never mind one like her.

They were green and she was watching him. There were tears in her red-rimmed eyes. She touched the pillow with her fingers, pulling it closer, resting her chin on it.

"I suppose Rex brought me out here," she said softly.

"Yes." Chopper, his curiosity about her eye color satisfied, turned his scarred face slightly away from her. She hadn't looked at his scars except once and then she'd had a look of regret that she couldn't do anything about them. For that tiny regret, Chopper had decided her friendship would be worthwhile.

She sighed deeply. "Did he tell you why I was crying?"

"I didn't ask. He didn't say." Chopper said. "Just that you'd been crying and to keep watch over you."

"I think he meant from anywhere in the back yard." Saria chuckled.

Chopper blushed, the scars on his face paling in comparison. He lay onto his back, his arms supporting his head. "It was my pleasure to sit here and keep a closer watch."

His body language told her he wasn't finished. She waited.

"It let me imagine." He added softly.

"Imagine what?"

His lips puckered and then he sucked in the bottom lip and released it with a soft noise. "Let me imagine you were mine. Imagine you'd be my woman. Nothing sexual. Just little," he blew out, "not even dreams. Figments of a future life, maybe. You smiling at me. Or me doing something silly, like climbing a tree to get you a perfect goldenfruit. Watching you read and you'd look at me and smile. Watching our kids play." He heard her gulp and looked at her sideways, one eyebrow raised. Then he nodded.

"I've had a lot of problems, mostly mental, and the scars don't help." He continued as if she hadn't gulped, as if he hadn't looked at her with raised eyebrow, but he knew. Saria had seen that in his eyes.

"Being a trooper didn't allow us to meet many women," Chopper continued. "Being in prison prevented us from meeting any. Most of us here are never going to find a woman to love us. Most of us don't know how to act around women." He gazed at the sky, a sad expression on his face. "I don't."

"You act very well around me, Chopper."

"You haven't seen me flirt." His voice was dismissive.

"I have, Chopper. You do very well at flirting when you simply tell the truth. It's …" she reached for a description but couldn't find on she liked. He rolled onto his side, watching her think. "It's perfectly and uniquely you."

He thought about that. "Thank you." Then he lowered his eyes to the blanket and poked at the design with a finger. "Can you tell me what I've said or done and I'll try to repeat it?"

She pushed the pillow under her head and shook her finger at him with a smile. "Repetition is the antithesis of flirting. Flirting is supposed to be fun, enjoyable and spontaneous. Few things are enjoyable when you do them over and over."

Chopper smiled at her finger then grinned widely as he looked into her green eyes. "How about you tell me what I've said or done and I'll try it out on different women." She chuckled deep in her throat.

"But flirting is only part of the pathway. You don't want to be doing the same thing, even with different women, because it gets you no further."

"Those deep, long private hugs with hours of body touching and kissing. When it's not flirting." He murmured.

"You've been talking to Crux." She recognized her own words, her own desires. She sniffed and put her hand to her lips, closing her eyes. Chopper was quiet for a moment.

"Crux has been talking to everyone." He said when she opened her eyes again, ready for conversation. Chopper laughed softly. "Like it's a big secret that he's revealing. That's not what I want." She looked at him with one eyebrow raised in disbelief. Chagrined, he bowed his head and blushed. "I mean that's not all I want. I want what Cut has, what Rex and Echo have, what Fives has."

"And what's that?" she asked, but she knew. It was what she wanted as well.

He shrugged. "Family. A woman to love. Children to raise with her. A home. Someone to put all my labor." His face was earnest. "I want to find someone so I can give her everything I can give her."

"What are you going to do if you don't find a woman like that?" Her voice was reflective, understanding.

"Keep searching until I die." He sat up quickly, gracefully, his elbows on his knees. His voice was low. "I don't know what I'd do for something like that." He looked down at the soft grass. "And coming from a man who's done everything that I've done, that's a scary thought."

Saria reached up and touched his arm. She wished she could reassure him, wished she could guarantee he'd find love. She couldn't and he had fewer illusions than his brothers about his chances.

Chopper touched her fingers, looked into her eyes, his own full of sorrow. "Thanks for talking with me, for letting me," he looked down briefly. "For letting me imagine."

She got up to her knees, hugged him tightly around his neck and gave him a kiss on the cheek when he leaned into the hug. He was still.

"May I kiss you the same?" he asked, his face twisting with hope. She nodded.

"Kisses on the cheek are appropriate between friends." She explained. "If both lean toward each other." She leaned toward him.

"I don't have many friends. Thank you for that as well." His kiss on her cheek was like the touch of a light breeze in sunlight; warm and pleasant.

**Rex and Jester**

"Jester, can we talk for a few minutes?" Rex had lines on his forehead as he frowned. He was sitting on a grassy hillock with his back against a tree. Rex gestured next to himself.

"Certainly. What about?" Jester gracefully sat next to Rex and handed him one of the bottles of water he'd be hauling back to camp. Sketch had made it to Echo's camp but needed to rest before he tried to make it back at the moment so Jester was doing some of the work needed to keep the camps in order.

"Saria." Rex watched as Jester immediately closed him out; looking away, folding his arm and leaning back. Jester's lips were tight, the lines of his face deeper.

"Ok," said Rex as he relaxed a bit more against the tree. "Maybe not Saria. How about this Cass Cjain?"

Jester relaxed a bit, but not much. "She's a woman who lives not far from us."

Rex noted Jester's words. "Us? I thought Saria moved out."

Jester looked down.  "I'm hoping she'll come back." He muttered after a moment.

"Have you thought about asking her to come back?" asked Rex.

"I thought we were talking about Cass." Jester's face was stony with anger.

Rex shrugged. "She lives not far from you. What else?"

"She's pretty, younger than Saria by a couple of years. She doesn't have a thought in her head except men." Jester gave a chuckle. "She doesn't like Cut and Suu too much because Cut won't have anything to do with her; but if she knew how many brothers he had here right now, she'd be dividing her time between the camps."

"Is that why you went to visit her, Jester? Because she was convenient and Saria was busy?" Rex took a sip of the water.

Jester frowned. "No." He shook his head. "No. Saria said I had to share her with Chymdura and I didn't think I could share." Jester hung his head, his arms draped over his elbows, shaking his head.  "I thought I'd be physiologically incapable of sharing," he continued. "But getting into bed with Saria and her expecting me to hug her and kiss her and make love to her." Jester shook his head again. "I didn't want to find out that way but I needed to find out."

Rex nodded, letting Jester know he was listening. The bottle swinging between his fingers.

"So I went to Cass Cjain's house. And I smiled at her and she had my clothes off before I could finish saying 'hello'." Jester said nothing for a few seconds and when he did speak, it was in a shamed whisper. "I couldn't do anything."

Rex made a sound in his mouth as he took another drink. "So, because you couldn't sexually perform with someone you didn't particularly like, you felt that you couldn't sexually perform with someone you loved?"

"It doesn't make sense the way you say it, Rex."

"Doesn't make sense the way you did it, Jester." Rex retorted. "But let's skip that for a second." He paused a moment, considering his words. "So you go home and tell Saria that because she's having sex with another man you can't have sex with another woman?"

"Rex, it's not making sense the way you're saying it." Jester objected again, his hands palm up.

"OK, Jester. Tell me so it makes sense." Rex finished off his water in a large gulp. "Tell me in a way that might make sense to Saria."

"Cass was just a test to see if I could function after Saria told me I had to share." Jester wasn't shouting, but he was close. "Ok, Rex, I'll admit, not a very good test. But I was scared."

"What were you scared of Jester?" Rex asked quietly.

"That Saria wouldn't want me anymore." Jester whispered his lips tight and his face pale. "That I'd crawl into bed with her; hugging her warm skin, kissing her lips and not get hard for her." Jester put his hand to his face for a moment. "And she'd leave."

Rex sighed, shaking his head. "So, because you couldn't get hard, you decided to deprive her of hugs and kisses and your company. Because you were afraid she would leave, you made her leave. Have I got that right, Jester?"

Jester had a sour look on his face, but he nodded. "You make it sound like I was being selfish."

" _I_ make it sound?" asked Rex with one eyebrow. "You're the one told me what happened." There was silence between them for a time.

Jester frowned and nodded. "It sounds like I was being selfish."

"It sounds like it," agreed Rex.

"Rex, she's the best thing in my life. That's ever been in my life. And I was terrified that I'd lose her.

"I know, Jester," Rex took in a breath. "But, it seems that you're close to losing her now."

Jester hung his head dejectedly between his knees. "I know."

"Could you share her, now?" Rex asked.

"Doesn't matter. I can't do anything now." Jester replied.

"You can hold her and kiss her. You can share in her life, laugh with her." Rex gave a half grin. "You can talk to Echo about satisfying her without being hard. He's… imaginative.  Or maybe just listens to Fives a lot." Rex saw Cody walking up the hill toward them. He stood, back to debriefing. It had turned into them debriefing each other.

"It seems to me, Jester," Rex was solemn now. "That you gave up on Saria before she gave up on you."

"She said that I had to share…" Jester began.

"Jester, Saria didn't even understand what 'share' is. She had to ask me. When I told her, she said that she didn't share either. Not sexually. So something is very wrong between you. And it isn't what happens in bed."

Cody stood slightly apart, reluctant to interrupt their conversation.

"I think you need to apologize for going to Cass Cjain. You need to ask her what she actually meant when she said you had to share. You need to, at the very least, to talk to her." Rex shrugged a shoulder. "Maybe you have more things to apologize for. Maybe she has things to apologize for. But I'll tell you this Jester. When I first saw Ahsoka after five years…" Rex paused. "I told myself I'd share her with Jabba the Hutt to keep her in my life. If Saria isn't worth that to you, maybe she'd be better off if you just gave her up outright."

**Cody**

Cody was a bit shaky as he stood. A good debrief could do that to a man; drag everything from him including things he wasn't sure of, make him realize things he hadn't know, acknowledge emotions thought buried. Rex was good. Cody grinned, almost as good as he was.

Cody understood why Rex had grabbed three of his men and deserted as well as his hesitancy around children. Rex understood what had happened in prison and why these were _Cody's_ men now though both wanted them to be free men now, answerable to no captain or commander but only to themselves.

Both men walked clean now, taking deep breaths of the fresh Saleucami air and stretching their muscles. Rex clapped his hand over Cody's shoulder.

"Whoa, brother. I am glad that is finished." He lowered his head just a bit and Cody's face became curious. "For me."

"And me," stated Cody. "Going through everything. Thank you, Rex."

"You, too, Cody. Thank you. But you aren't quite finished yet, I think."

"You think?"

Rex nodded. "Because of that." He brushed his fingers against the padawan beads on Cody's wrist. "Ahsoka would like to speak with you. She told me that this morning, after she saw it and recognized it as belonging to Barriss."

Cody nodded as he touched what was left of her. It was Barriss' padawan braid, small beads braided into her dark hair, removed at her knighting. He'd worn it inside his armor until he had deserted, then on his right wrist after so he would always be reminded of her before he raised his hand to do anything. He wished he'd worn it since Order 66. He might have deserted sooner. They'd taken it when they captured him. Boil had returned it.

He found Ahsoka sitting with Aureki, speaking Togrutan and giggling like small girls. He watched them for a moment, and then Ahsoka caught sight of him.

"Debrief done?" She asked in courtesy. He wouldn't be there if it wasn't.

"With Rex, but I'm told you want a few words also." He glanced at Aureki. Did he have to bare his soul to this stranger?

The tall Togruta woman smiled. "I must help Suu with preparations for dinner," she said as she rose from the ground and Cody reached out to help her. She was not as graceful as Ahsoka. Softly, Aureki touched him on the shoulder and gave him a small hug. "I knew Barriss also, if only for a short time."

Cody sat next to Ahsoka. Usually debriefing was face to face. He didn't think he'd be able to talk about Barriss face to face.

"Ask anything, Ahsoka." He said. He'd hold nothing back; he knew she'd been Barriss' friend. Barriss had talked about her often.

"Perhaps I should say that, Cody. Because I am here to tell." Her voice was low and gentle. "I will tell, then you may ask anything you wish of me."

Cody nodded. She would be giving him a portion of Barriss' life for his starving soul. Every portion of her life was important to him.

"I was pregnant and I told the Jedi council that I would raise my own child." Ahsoka began. "Very few people reacted the way I thought they would. My master, who I thought would urge me to give the child away, urged me to think long and hard but, in the end, was glad for my choice. General Kenobi, who I thought would accept my decision, was adamantly against it. Both Masters Yoda and Windu were wavering as though reconsidering the stricture against attachment.  Master Mundi, with his own family who I thought would understand was against." She sighed softly, remembering the time before Order 66 then she smiled brightly, "But Barriss, Barriss who was my best friend, squealed with delight and hugged me and gently teased me about how round I would grow and what to name my son."

Cody smiled. "That doesn't sound like calm, collected Commander Offee. Most of her men wouldn't recognize that part of her."

"But you would," Ahsoka put her hand on his.

"Yes." He turned his hand, palm up, clasping hers in his. It was almost like touching Barriss again.

"When I told Barriss I was pregnant, she stood by me in Council. When she could, Barriss visited Shili. She said she would be there for my child's birth and that was good because I was scared. I was so scared."

"Why? Women give birth all the time." Cody was mystified about childbirth, but there wouldn't be any races if women didn't give birth. Except clones.

"Women die in childbirth, Cody. The child can die. They can both die. Cut almost lost both Suu and Keeli at his birth. Only Echo's constant reading and Rex kidnapping Dr. Chymdura saved Suu and the baby. I had never seen an easy birth and I was as scared as a shiny going into battle with no direction. Barriss said she would deliver my baby."

Cody nodded.

"Barriss came to visit about a month before Barin was due. Partially to check up on me, partially because she had those days free, and mostly," Ahsoka's face lit up. "Because we were best friends." She looked at Cody. "We visited and talked and went out for walks and she checked if she could do anything for Aureki. We went into town and teased all the men." She smiled in memory. "That is a custom of Shili; that pregnant women tease the men so they would go home and make their own wives pregnant." She blushed. "It was a lot of fun. The men must act as though the pregnant woman is their beloved. I got hugs and kisses and compliments that I hadn't received before in my pregnancy." There were tiny diamonds of tears in the corners of her eyes.

Roughly, Cody hugged her. "Why didn't you tell Rex? Or have Barriss tell Rex? He would have..,"

"I didn't know that, Cody. I had no idea what Rex would do. We had a very public argument on the _Resolute_. Because of the argument, the men, most of the men," she amended. "Treated me like a woman common to all of them. And Rex did nothing." Her chin was firm and Cody saw that pain had hurt.

"I'm sorry, Ahsoka. I know Rex is sorry he did nothing." He paused, "Does it still bother you."

"I know that now, but it shook me then." She shook her head. "When Barriss came for that visit, she was luminous in happiness. She told me that she had two men, two equals, two lovers. She said she would not leave the Jedi Order at that time and, because of that, they could only be lovers. She didn't tell me who but when I saw her braid on your wrist, I knew one."

"Me and Gree." Cody smile, though his eyes were moist with unshed tears. "She said that when the war was over she would leave the Jedi and marry us. We weren't sure the GAR would let us go, but we promised her we would do whatever it took to keep her near us." He laughed softly. "Once, we'd all three had a bit much Corellian ale and she put on armor to see if she could pass as a trooper. Definitely not." Cody gave a shallow laugh then his face changed. "Gree took a blaster wound, a bad one, which put him in stasis for Kamino and she followed your old general's habit of immediate self-redeployment to his battalion and healed him on-site."

Ahsoka nodded.

"We loved her." Cody's own eyes were shiny with unshed tears "Both Gree and I share. Shared. There was so much of her to share. She and Gree would talk for hours about some tiny detail of ancient cultures. I loved listening to their discussions. All three of us would discuss battlefield tactics and strategies." He gave a deep sigh and was quietly pensive for a moment. "We were not often assigned together. But sometimes; some rare, wonderful times, the three of us were together."

Ahsoka put her hand into Cody's. "When Barriss came for Barin's birth it was two months to Order 66." She saw his quick look of pain and the frown on his lips at the mention of Order 66. "She, my mothers and my sisters were there. Between my training and Barriss' healing, it was a fairly easy birth. She stayed for three days after his birth, to make sure I had no problem." Ahsoka smiled. "I didn't, so most of our time was spent talking and cooing over Barin. Barriss loved to hold him." Ahsoka's voice softened. This could not be easy for Cody. "'Practice' she told me, 'for my own daughter.'"

Cody's mouth opened and then he closed his eyes and clenched his teeth together. He bowed his head until it touched her shoulder. Ahsoka's hands came to his head and stroked his face, his short hair.

"She said that all three of you were together 'for once' two weeks previous." She spoke softly into his ear.

"Two weeks?" whispered Cody between his tears. "That's too early to know."

"Not for a Jedi who can feel a life signature. Not for a Healer who can see into her own body and feel the very cells." She continued to stoke Cody's face and felt the wetness of his tears on her shoulder. "She said she was going to ask the Council for transfer to Kamino Medical when she was three months along. She said she was going to let the council know that she would be giving up her child to remain a Jedi."

Cody shook his head, opened his mouth, but couldn't express his thoughts; his love for Barriss and Gree and their unborn child; a child forever unborn. "To never see …"

"Do you think Barriss meant never to see her daughter? Do you think Barriss didn't mean to tell you? She was going to tell both her loves as soon as you were all three together again. She asked me and Aureki to adopt her daughter. We were ecstatic to say 'yes'. Do you think we would have prevented her fathers from seeing her?" She lifted his face with her hands to look into his eyes.

"No," he whispered softly, shaking his head. "It would be the best for everyone. Would have been the best solution." He shuddered and drew back from her hands, tears still in his eyes.

Ahsoka felt pain for him. "I didn't tell you for sorrow's sake. I told you because Barriss loved you and that was part of her life."

"Thank you." He bent and kissed her on the cheek. She stood gracefully, leaving him to mourn his family.

**Saria**

Dare had fallen asleep in the cot with one foot still solidly planted on the floor. Kix looked at her and nodded at her raised eyebrow.

"He argued and argued about keeping Edge with him, but you were right and, as it turned out, Dare passed out on the way to one of the camps."

Saria gasped and took another look at the sleeping man, "He didn't…"

"No, Edge was ready." Kix said as he shook his head and Saria relaxed. "Caught him, lowered him to the ground and made him rest for a short time before commanding him back to the barn. Edge says Dare gave him an argument." Kix shook his head again. "Maybe, but when Dare got here, I gave him a pain med and told him to rest." Kix chuckled. "He merely saluted his affirmative."

Saria smiled. "For a man who can't speak, he certainly knows how to state his needs. I've seen some of the men laugh at the way he uses those signals, but they understand what he wants. It makes me want to learn them. 'Small arms fire' for headache is just so appropriate."

"It's mostly context," said Kix as he fingered through some paperwork. "We've got three more men coming tomorrow to begin their physicals and two the day after." He smiled. "Col passed his physical and his psyc today and some of the men are considering that lucky."

Saria pulled up Varzhain's Humanoid Anatomy and Variations on her data pad and fingered through until she came to the section on human ankles; she flicked the switch to holo and set the pad on the desk. A blue flaring brought up a 3D image and she manipulated it until the foot resembled Sketch's twisted appendage. She made a second image, creating cuts as she had seen then twisting the image. Finally, Saria made a third image of a perfect foot. She overlapped the three images and studied the tendons and ligaments; how they interacted, their stressed areas, their attachment to bone.

"Sula suggested to Col that he play with the kids and help with the infant," continued Kix as Saria saved the image and set it aside. "He seemed pretty anxious to start."

"Wait until she hands him the baby," laughed Sketch as he entered the med barn followed by Jester. "She is so tiny; I could hold her in one hand."

"That's not suggested," replied Kix with his brows drawn. Would Sketch actually try such a move, endangering the child?

Saria laughed. "All men say that about newborns." Kix relaxed, but he would have a word with Sketch and Col. Just in case. Babies took both hands. He'd make sure all the men knew. Just in case.

"I was terrified," Sketch continued, "that both of my hands and arms weren't sufficient."

"So Sketch, how was your day?" Saria watched as Sketch moved and nodded to herself. His moves were solid and confident. She pointed him to a chair and he sat, handling himself and his crutches properly. Jester leaned against the wall by the door, his arms crossed and his lips slightly upturned.

"I'm close to my limit right now but today was good," Sketch said tiredly. "No muscle spasms if that's what you're asking."

"It is." She knelt in front of him, lightly inspecting his leg through his pants. His muscles seemed warm, relaxed as much as possible. She stood. "Off you go. I'll check you once more after dinner, a little more thoroughly. In the house." Saria smiled at him. "I think you're doing very well."

He smiled back, in gratitude. "I don't want to overdo it by too much and I have plans for going to the back yard for dinner tonight. I'm going to rest." He moved out the med barn door. Jester stood erect from leaning against the wall, to follow him. "I'll be in the house," Sketch moved toward the back of the house to go in via the back door. He moved with more grace than he had yesterday or even earlier that morning. Edge fell in step beside them, talking with Sketch and Jester paused, slowly turning back to the med barn.

Saria nodded, happy with Sketch's progress. She turned to Jester who'd returned. "You did very well with Sketch, Jester. He looks secure on his crutches."

"Thanks, Saria." He watched her, simply chewing his lower lip. "Would you like to sit down, Saria?"

"Sure," Saria was surprised, but happy that Jester wanted to talk. She was relaxed, refreshed from her earlier nap, and everything was going well in the med barn. "How about on the porch with Kayl? I know Checkout and Djinn came by to talk to him earlier, but he looks lonely now."

"I'd rather…," Jester paused. "Alone." His voice was asking, his eyes pleading.

"Of course, Jester." She spoke softer this time. Tentatively, he put his arm around her waist, watching her to see if she'd refuse. Saria slowly touched his hand on her hip with hers, wrapping her fingers around his.

They walked the few steps to outside the barn where they sat beneath one of the tall trees. Jester peered up, intently, into the leaves.

"Some of the men like to climb the trees and relax. Echo said that Chopper even sleeps in one." He told her with a smile. Then he lost his smile. "I don't want them to listen. I want to speak with you privately." He was quiet then, his fingers playing with a thatch of grass at his feet, trying to gather his words. "I saw Rex earlier this afternoon."

Saria stiffened, wondering if Rex had told Jester she was pregnant then she relaxed. Rex wouldn't tell anyone. She still didn't understand how he had known.

"He pointed out that I was being selfish. That I hadn't thought about you." Jester sighed. "I do think about you. I think about you all the time and what can I do to make you stay and how much I want you and when you smile at me and how your hair shines in the sunlight and how much I miss you and how much I love you." He shut his eyes and took a breath and bowed his head. "I'm sorry, Saria. I'm sorry I've been ignoring you. I'm sorry I went to Cass Cjain's. I'm sorry I've been going running or leaving the house to just sit on the stump. Mostly I'm sorry that I haven't been holding you or kissing you."

"Will you explain why you went to Cass', Jester?" she asked softly, afraid he'd jump up and leave."

After a moment, he nodded. Once. A short nod that was barely perceptible.

"I didn't think I could share, Saria. Physiologically share." He paused and glanced around. "I went to Cass to find out if it was true." Miserably, he stared down at the grass. "She had my clothes off, kissing me, touching me."

Jester noticed Saria's lips, downturned, trembling. He would have stopped, but she had asked, wanting to understand.

"I couldn't do anything, Saria," he whispered harshly. "She did things that would make a dead man rise, but not me. I have become incapable of pleasing a woman." He looked at her, misery in his eyes. "Incapable of pleasing you."

Saria looked at him, angrily, tears running from her eyes. "You went to another woman to test yourself? You didn't bother coming to me? You didn't say to me, 'Saria, I'm concerned about impotence, could we check?'"

He winced at the word.

"You didn't bother asking me if your kisses or your hugs or your mere presence pleased me." She was still a moment, her body suddenly frozen in rage as her tears ran in rivers over her ashen face. "Was everything we had together based on illusion? Based solely on your performance?" She sucked in a breath.  "What would you have done…" Her brows drew down in ferocious anger. "What the _hell_ would you have done if you'd had an erection with Cass?"

 _Fierfik!_ He hadn't thought of that. Would he have walked out his misery only temporarily assuaged until he crawled into bed with Saria? Would he have stayed, held by Cass' enticement? His eyes went wide and he couldn't name the emotion that caused it. Shock, shame… they battled for supremacy.

She drew her knees up to her chest and grabbed them with her arms, shaking. "You didn't say, 'Saria, could we discuss this sharing', maybe I've heard you wrong, maybe I'm making assumptions and I want clarity. Rather than going off on a two-hour run, you could have said something like, 'Saria, can we just talk?' or 'Saria, I'd just like to hold you. Even 'Saria, care to join me?' would have let me know that I mattered to you." She stared at him as if she didn't know him; her eyes red and her cheeks blotchy.

"I was afraid you'd..."

"I'd what, Jester? Afraid I'd do what?" She laughed bitterly as she stood. "Leave you for Chymdura? He's not even a good friend, much less a lover. Sketch is a better friend. Chopper is a better friend. Neither of them are my lovers. Chymdura's a good doctor, but that's it. You believe I'm 'sharing' with Chymdura. Chymdura? He's a work colleague. But you don't believe me. So you gave up on me and …" she stopped, shivered and then angrily spat the words. "And my baby."

"And who's child is it, Saria?" he asked angrily and regretted it even as he spoke, seeing the truth about Chymdura in her face. But his mouth had the retort before his brain could intercept it with joy. He saw her face go white. Her jaw clenched so tight he was scared she'd shatter some teeth.

"MINE!" she hissed, turning on her toes.

"Saria, I'm…" he began, but she was gone, running to the house.

He ran after her, faster than her, but at that short distance with her quick start and him from a seated position, his speed didn't count for much. He was on the porch steps when he grabbed her arm. It was not a good grip and she turned, pushing him away with a release he had taught her. It was just enough time for her to enter the house. He heard the bar slip in the latch.

"Saria," he yelled through the door, pounding it with his fist. "Saria! Come back." He turned to Kayl who looked at him with open-mouthed surprise, and a little anger written on his face. Jester glowered at him as he one-handedly jumped over the railing for the back yard.

By the time, he got to the back door it was also locked, with a bemused Cut standing outside. He looked at Jester. "I don't think she wants to talk to you right now."

"She has to, she's pregnant." Jester growled.

"Hmm," nodded Cut staring at Jester. Then he shook his head. "Good luck, Jester." His voice left no doubt that Jester would need all the good luck he could find. Cut turned and left.

Jester pounded on the door. "Saria! Open the door." Several troopers playing with Barin in the back yard watched him. They ducked their eyes as he glared at them angrily. Dub picked up the child and started toward the front yard. The others trailed him.

"Saria!" he yelled. "Don't ignore me."

Saria sat in the dim coolness of the house, shaking. She didn't know if it was rage or the ripping to shreds of her heart. In between Jester's pounding at the door, her heart pounded. After a while, the outside pounding stopped. The inner pounding continued. She laid her head on the table in her arms and cried.

A soft hand caressed her back. She stiffened and then relaxed as the hand continued even as her tears continued.

It was Sketch, of course. He had said he was tired and needed to rest his leg. She'd known that, perhaps it was why she'd run to the house.

She turned and buried her face into his chest, clutching his shirt. He curled his arm around her protectively, saying nothing. She looked up at him, her eyes red with tears and her chin quivering. Suddenly it stilled with her determination.

"Will you marry me, Sketch?"

Softly, he shook his head. "I'm crippled, Saria. I'll be crippled until my dying day and no one understands that better than you. I can't provide for you, can't…" his mouth tightened. "Well, there'll be a lot of things I can't do."

"Can you love a child? Can you hold a baby? Change a diaper, burp an infant? Can you do that, Sketch?" Her eyes peered at him.

He nodded, curious. "Yes."

"Even if you don't know who the father is?" she challenged.

"I'd know who the mother is." He said warmly suddenly realizing why she asked; smiling, his breath caressed her face. "Wouldn't I?"

She nodded. "Could you hold me when I'm tired? Warm me when I'm lonely? Kiss me when I come home? Care for me? Hug me when I cry? Forgive me when I mess up?

Again, he nodded. "Probably not much more, but yes, I can very happily do that."

She took a deep breath and let it out. "Can you talk to me when you're angry? Instead of running... oh." She turned pink in embarrassment and covered her lips with her fingers.

His lips turned into a smile at the color in her cheeks. "Definitely, no thirty-five klick runs. And I won't go sitting outside, especially in the cold." He turned serious. "I'll talk to you when I'm angry. If you or I get too angry, I'd ask for us to go to our corners for a while."

She gave a nod. "Then, will you marry me?"

He sighed deeply. "What about Jester?" he asked softly.

"Jester," she said bitterly, her eyes tearing up. "Jester doesn't share."

"Neither do you, Saria." Sketch ran his fingers in her hair, untying the ribbon in back and smoothing it out.

"Jester doesn't believe that." Her face was bleak as she said that. "I can't marry a man who believes I lie."

"I can share, if you wish." Sketch offered. "I'm not likely to find anyone who wants me, so that's a moot point. But if it came to sharing or losing you, I'd do whatever it took to not lose you."

"I want you, Sketch."

"Me or a duplicate of my brother?" he asked sharply, peering at her with his amber-brown eyes.

She looked at him. He was so much like Jester and she wondered if that was why she proposed. Her lips came to a firm line. "Jester is on the other side of the door." She pointed out. "And if I wanted him, I'd go open that door and listen to him apologize for his thoughtless words."

"Then why not let him apologize."

She shook her head. "They _were_ thoughtless words. He didn't have to think about them. They were at the front of his mind, the first thing he thought of. And every time Jester looks at this child, he will be wondering who the father is. And I won't do that to my child."

"Well, if he's purple with green strips, I might wonder that myself." Sketch's voice was slow, laconic, slightly ironic.

She giggled, her eyes still glistening with tears.

"But I'd still love him, hold him." Sketch smiled. "Yes, Saria, I will marry you. I will care for you and your child, your children to the best of my ability. With one stipulation." He took her hand in his and brought it to his face, softly caressed it with his lips.

She nodded. "What's the stipulation?"

"You will give yourself thirty days to decide." He grew serious. "You will flirt with all the men, get to know us; to determine if what you love in Jester is something common to all of us or if it is unique to Jester. You will decide whether it is Jester or me or someone else who you can love. Who can love you as you need to be loved?" Softly he leaned over her and kissed her silken hair. "When you decide you wanted Jester all along or if you decide on another man, you will tell me. I don't want you wondering, when you're married to me, if you choose me. By the time you have this child I will love you too much to leave you to anyone else. And this mess with Jester will seem like sweet innocence in comparison."

Saria gazed into his amber colored eyes, listening to his warning. "Yes."

He smiled as he kissed her palm, placed his arms around her and hugged her to his body. She took a deep, cleansing breath and leaned into his chest.

There was a soft knock at the door and then a voice. "It's Chopper. May I come in?"

Sketch laughed. "If you can, Chopper, my arms are full."

There was some jiggling at the lock and the door swung open. Chopper strode in with a grin. "I asked Cut how to get in," he answered their unspoken question. He turned and re-barred the door, pulling back some cord. "Now it's locked." He shook his head. "Jester must have been too flustered to think of it."

"It's a boundary," explained Sketch and Chopper thought for a second, then nodded.

He came to the table, inspecting them, her tears drying on her face as she sat tucked into Sketch's side with his arm around her. Chopper sighed as he sat across from them at the table. He looked at them and then shook his head. "Too late."

"Too late for what, Chopper?" asked Sketch.

Chopper brushed the back of his head with his fingers then leaned his elbows on the table. "I heard about the argument. From Kix who'd been at the barn door, so there wasn't too much distortion of what had happened." He smiled gently at Saria. "So I came to ask if you'd give me long hugs and sweet kisses; when it wasn't flirting anymore. And, in exchange, I'd give you everything I am."

"Oh." Saria smiled. "That would be a wonderful gift, Chopper."

"It's not too late, Chopper," supplied Sketch. He looked at Saria. "Saria has broken her engagement with Jester."

Chopper's eyes glittered and his brows rose in question. "Poor Jester." His voice was expressionless as he waited.

"But she will not consider me for thirty days."

Chopper's eyes widened slightly and he glanced down as he very slightly moistened his lips. Then he looked at her with fear and hope in his mismatched eyes.

Sketch continued. "For the next month, Saria will be getting to know every man here. To see if what she loves is common to all of us or unique to Jester. Or unique to any one of us."

Chopper nodded slightly. "Saria." She lifted her eyes to his. Her glistened with tears and her cheeks were blotchy red. She was beautiful.  "You know I will try my hardest to convince you, don't you?" he asked softy. His hand reached out for hers and took it with his large fingers. He didn't give her an encouraging squeeze, simply held her small fingers with his larger ones.

She nodded. "I know," she whispered. He continued holding her hand, softly stroking her fingers with his thumb. Sketch watched the longing on his face, Chopper's vulnerability laid clear for both of them to see. If he ever drew that picture, he'd have to burn it.

Chopper set her fingers down on the table and recomposed his features into a look of amusement with a wry grin. "Jester is stalking around the house, waiting to confront you, Saria, so he can apologize." He gave a short laugh. "It seems everyone has business in the yard now. Everyone is there but the scouts and some of Echo's camp who are down at the pool. Crux is within a few feet of him, hoping that he might get a chance to propose before Jester can apologize." Chopper's eyes glittered with humor. "Crux said that he had permission to propose to you once and this seemed a more advantageous time than waiting a month."

Saria stifled a laugh. "Poor Crux."

Chopper laughed. "Don't 'poor Crux'. He's lecturing Jester on how to treat a woman. Which is pretty funny since he hadn't even seen one until our escape from prison."

Both Saria and Sketch laughed at that but Saria's laughter verged on hysteria. Sketch frowned at his leg and Chopper caught that. "What do you need, Sketch?"

"Something for her to drink." Sketch requested. Chopper was up and in the kitchen even as she was telling him 'not to bother, she was fine'.

Sketch held her in his arms and drew his fingers through her hair. "This has been a tiring few days for all of us, Saria and you've been taking care of us. Let us take care of you as well?"

Saria took a breath and leaned against Sketch as Chopper handed her the glass. "Ok." She wiped a tear from the side of her nose.

"Head high, Saria", Chopper said. "Make Jester work hard to try to win you back." He let his fingers linger on hers on the glass. "If that's what you really want." His voice was soft.

\------------------------------

Head high, Chopper had said, and so she walked out into the yard with her head high and her shoulders back. She saw Jester and almost froze. He quickly started toward the porch. Crux, just as quick, was in step with him. She turned toward Kayl, leaning on his elbow on the cot, amusement on his face at the two men.

"Kayl, I was meaning to come visit earlier." Her cheeks were still pink and her eyes slightly red from her crying. Kayl kindly ignored these as he gestured to the chair beside his cot.

"Thanks for letting me have the day out." He gave a half grin. "I was tempted to get up and play in the yard with Barin," he saw her frown and raised a hand. "But I was a good lad and stayed put."

"Good." She touched his raised hand softly and he watched her fingers, but only for an instant before he caressed them lightly then slipped his hand back down to his cot.

"I heard about Dare," he admitted, his half grin beginning to widen. "I decided I could be patient."

She smiled at him, a little wan, but a smile nonetheless. "As a reward, tomorrow you can walk to the back yard for lunch. Then back when you're done."

"Thank you, Saria. Escorted, I suppose?"

"Of course and go slowly." She looked around. Shaeeah was gathering some of the regulars for a game of team chase. Echo was already laughing, planning strategy with Jek and Checkout. "I'll send Kix and Edge when you're ready to go inside."

"Not for a while, Saria." Kayl looked at the players and then he glanced down at the wooden boards of the porch. "Maybe … not all night?" he asked looking up, questions in his eyes.

Her lips narrowed, as she considered. "We'll see after dinner. Do you have anyone who will stay with you?"

Kayl smiled hopefully. "Djinn said he would, if you agreed." He pointed. Djinn, on Shaeeah's team, was already conspiring with Numa and Boil. Boil, glancing in their direction, caught Saria's eyes and held them a moment.

She turned back to Kayl and nodded. "If I agree, I'll talk to Djinn."

Jester had one foot on the first step, as did Crux. There was no room between them. She stood and turned toward the steps, head high.

"Crux," she smiled and held out her hand. He moved forward with a smile and took her hand.

"Saria, I would like to ..." He caught her look and changed what he was going to say. Absently, Saria noted he was very good at that. "To ask you a few questions and was wondering if I could ask while I escorted you to the med barn?"

"Of course, Crux." They stepped past Jester and Saria couldn't help grabbing Crux's hand tightly. He seemed not to notice.

"I am sorry, Saria." Jester's voice was so quiet only she and Crux heard him. He hadn't moved, his foot on the first step, his face looking down.

Saria didn't look at him, afraid she'd break, afraid she'd cry or yell or scream or hit him with her fists. Afraid she'd hate him. Already, she could feel new tears starting to form in her eyes.

"Give me time to heal, Jester. Maybe we can salvage friendship." Her own voice was no louder than his had been. She saw his tiny nod. Saria went with Crux.

Crux chewed the inner portion of his mouth as he escorted her back to the med barn. Intersexual social relations were a lot more complicated than they appeared, more than what any brother had indicated.

"What? No questions?" She asked softly, her hand relaxing.

"Lots of questions," he replied, glancing at her. "I just don't know where to begin." His eyes narrowed and he looked down at their clasped hands. "Is now a good time to propose?"

"Excellent question. No, it would be a disaster and I'm very grateful to you for not proposing on the porch. Thank you." She let go of his hand.

"I saw that in your face," he nodded, absently rubbing his hand. She saw she'd left fingernail marks. "Do I understand correctly that you and Jester used to be engaged but not anymore and that you are expecting," he paused. "a child?"

"That's a rude question and usually would get you slapped, but given these circumstances..." She sighed. "That is correct."

Crux nodded as his brows furrowed. They reached the med barn door where Edge waited. Crux, another question on his lips, walked in with her, only to run into Edge blocking his path.

"Edge," exclaimed Crux. "I'm talking to Saria."

Edge ignored him, turning to Saria. "You've had a stressful day, Saria. Would you like to rest before dinner? I can  bring it in to you when I bring Kayl's. If you'd like."

"Thank you, Edge," she smiled. It was an unexpectedly kind offer from the blue-eyed man and one of the longer speeches the brusque trooper had said in her presence. "I appreciate the offer, but I can manage. Crux does have some questions." Edge shot Crux a frown, thinking he knew what kind of questions, but moved aside for him.

"I also need to tend to some scratches he has. Kayl will probably be spending the night on the porch," Saria continued. "Djinn will be there so we need to talk to him. You go relax a while; they're setting up for chase. I'll be here."

"If you're sure..." Edge let the question linger for a few moments then nodded and strode toward the front of the house to join in the games with Shaeeah. The dour trooper had turned out to enjoy the simple game more than almost anything and it was only then his stern features relaxed. Most of the men would be joining the game while some others would be helping Suu prepare dinner. A few of the men would be at the thermal pool, whichever camp was assigned.

"Is it common for women to raise children without assistance?" Crux asked, standing where Edge had stopped him.

"It's not uncommon. Sometimes with the child's father, sometimes with family, or friends or alone. But it's difficult to do most things alone and children are labor intensive." She sighed. "Let me check Dare and I'll be right back.

Crux nodded absently.

Dare was awake. "No hand signals at the moment, Dare," she told him. "It's just a bad time for me." He patted her hand softly. She sighed. Was there anyone in camp who hadn't heard or heard about the argument?

"Are you going to argue with me or Kix or Edge again about being escorted?"

Gently, he moved his head negative.

She reached up and brushed his hair away from his eyes. "I'm glad nothing happened to you, Dare." His face relaxed at her touch. "If you would like, you can go to the front porch to watch them play chase. You can have the freedom to travel between the med barn and the front porch without escort. If you feel faint, you sit down and put your head between your knees or you grab whoever may be nearby to help you. Anyplace else, you will be escorted. Understood?"

He saluted then gently nodded. She heard him sigh as he went out the door to watch - only watch - the game of team chase.

When Saria came back to Crux with some ointment for his hand, he had the stool in front of him. He shrugged. "I thought you might like another shoulder rub."

"Yes, I'd love one." She smiled as she touched light dabs of ointment on the crescent scratches her nails had put on his hand. "I believe it was going to be a month's worth before you got up the nerve to propose?" She sat the ointment aside, turned on the stool and his fingers touched her tense shoulders.

"The situation had changed, more information was gathered and a trooper is nothing if not adaptable. Suddenly, everything was different. It seemed as though proposing to you might yield more than a simple 'no'."

"You want a complicated 'no'," she joked. He was really very good at shoulder rubs. Crux was quiet.

"I'm not sure what I want." He admitted. "But I see Cut's expression when he looks at his wife or his kids and I know. I know, without any doubt at all, that is what I want. That … certainty."

"Is that what you see when you look at Cut?" She murmured, feeling his hand pressing firmly into her shoulders, relaxing her tight muscles.

"It's what I can identify. There's more, but I can't identify all those emotions. I don't know what they are." He was silent as he pressed a sore spot and she moaned softly deep in her throat.

"I want to know," Crux said much quieter after a moment. "And the way she looks at him… I practically die just to watch her expression for him. Imagine what I'd do if someone had that expression for me."

Saria leaned back against his strong legs, tears falling. She'd seen those looks on Cut and Suu so often. It seemed like _faith_ to her.

Crux noticed her tears. "Uh, should I leave?" he asked.

"No. Tears aren't always bad. Just extreme emotion. If you're talking to a woman and she starts crying, give her a soft hug, ask her if she's ok, offer to help if you can and you're willing. Don't run away, it's probably not you she's crying about."

"Oh."

"I hope you took notes, there'll be a quiz later," she joked.

"What!" he exclaimed, not recognizing her tone.

"Just kidding. Because sometimes you can start in tears and end in laughter." She sniffed. "And the other way, too."

His hands paused on her shoulders. She felt him lean over as he gently wrap his arms around her.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Crux's voice was soft and low.

She nodded softly, her arms wrapping around his, tears in her eyes. "This. Thank you. I don't think anything else, but the offer is appreciated."

"Are you crying because it will be difficult to raise a child alone?" he asked.

"I have friends and enough money to hire assistance," she said hesitantly. "And it won't be as difficult for me as for some others. Mostly I'm crying because I'm sad Jester doesn't believe the child is his. Because he…" She was quiet. What Jester had said he wanted was between him and her.

Crux knew anyway. "Because he, like most of us brothers, would love to have a child." His voice softened. "You will get proposals from men who only want a child, Saria." He continued in his regular voice. "Shall I take the di'kut out and beat sense into him?"

She muffled her laugher. "No."

"So there is nothing I can do for your crying?" He had pushed his chair back and was squatting behind her, his arms still around her, but now the warmth of his chest was against her back.

"This is good," she whispered, patting his hands around her. "Simply knowing there is another human being who cares about me right now, you holding me. That's about as much as possible, right now."

"Oh. Then lean back and truly relax," he instructed.

"Won't I tip you over?"

It was his turn to muffle his laughter.  "No," Crux answered simply. Tentatively, she leaned. He was like a rock, unyielding. She leaned, letting her muscles curve into his body. It was relaxing to simply let go of all her tension, to lean into that strength, that warmth.

At some point she was vaguely, sleepily, aware that he had picked up her and put her on a cot.

"I will come back later, Saria. I have more questions for you." He said softly as he covered her with a blanket.

**Out Processing III – Col**

It only took one day longer before his turn and that was because Echo had caught him sighing over the list the next morning.

"What's the matter, Col? I've heard that you have a clean physical and a clean psyc." He laughed softly. "That's more than most everyone else here."

"Just anxious to get it done, si... I mean, Echo."

"I've heard that you have someplace to be. Ahsoka came in late the other night, exhausted. Ship's not going anywhere for about a ten-day, but if you're eager to get the debrief done, I'll trade you."

"Would you?" Col's eyes brightened.

Echo shrugged. "Even once I get cleared, I'm pretty much committed here until there are a lot fewer men. Unlike Rex, I have no intention of doing debriefs." Echo moved over to the list and changed their names. As easily and quickly as that. "Hmm, looks like Chopper convinced Fives to trade with him. So, there's Cut, I've heard his debrief will be pretty short. He's mostly acclimated by now and that's one of the important things we're looking for. Not to mention he has no inclination of every leaving Saleucami."

Col's ears turned a little red. Was that a hint?

"Rex took a while, a long while. Then Chopper, then you." Echo smiled at Col. "Is that a little better for your timetable?"

Col laughed. "Yes sir, yes Echo. Thank you." He bowed his head for a moment. Echo's generosity had been a gift. Cut had told them there was no need to repay a gift, that it was a gift to the giver as well as the recipient. That hadn't made a lot of sense to Col. He pulled out the holovid. "Would you like to see my reasons for going?"

Echo nodded. "I think I would, Col."

Col flicked on the holovid. Echo smile to see Ehveen. It was rumored that he'd be a father in half a year's time as well.

"That's worth hurrying," said Echo as he put his hand on Col's shoulder. "Even if it's been years, it's still worth hurrying."

\------------------------------

Rex had finished his debrief with Cody and Col could tell a lot of worry and anger and frustration had been dragged out of both of them. Apparently they had debriefed each other in those two days. Now, they both looked clean, new. Cody walked lighter, as though he were no longer carrying a heavy burden. Rex didn't have that dark air about him that said he was looking for something to hit, hurt or destroy. He was heard to laugh occasionally.

Rex asked if Col would prefer to be debriefed by him; he still wasn't cleared by psyc, or would he prefer to wait on Cody who was talking with Cut.

Rex had chuckled. "It won't take long for Cut. He's had more years with Suu than the GAR and she's a thorough debriefer in her own way."

"Actually, Captain, sir. You. Rex. Sir." Col bit his tongue. It was one thing to call Sergeant Kix or ARC Sergeant Echo by name. It was something totally different to call this man, who wore his captain's rank like he wore his clothes, by the plain moniker of 'Rex'.

He saw Rex hide his mouth behind his hand, trying to keep a straight face, and not succeed.

Col gave that up for the moment. "You sir. I'll have a lot to say about prison and Cody was there. He doesn't have to hear it again."

"And I do?" asked Rex with a softly pained expression. Col thought about that for a moment, recalling his interviews with Kix and Sula.

"Maybe not," he conceded. "It's not like the physical or psyc briefings have been like GAR, Imperial or prison. Why should this one? What do you need to know?" He paused, put the name to his lips. "What do you want to know, Rex?"

"Tell me about Order 66. That's where it all begins. For all of us."

Col sighed. "I was on New Plympto with General Windu and the 187th. He'd gone back to Coruscant to confer with the Jedi council. We didn't know about what. Not then. Now we know he was killed trying to illegally arrest now-emperor Palpatine. There are still a lot of questions I'd like to have answered."

Rex nodded. "Still a lot of questions everyone would like to have answered. You aren't the only one. Even some on the old senate have quiet questions."

Col nodded, taking in the implications then continued. "General Jennir was also there on New Plympto with his command. I don't know if he was a traitor before, but after Order 66 didn't get him, he was." Col gave a half-laugh. "I don't blame him. I didn't blame him even before I turned traitor. The Nosaurians ran a hell of a guerilla battle before he joined them; afterwards they were eating us alive. So, the 501st was sent in."

Rex closed his eyes. There'd been good men in the 501st. There were still good men there, he was sure of it, held prisoner by their programming and their loyalty. Col waited until he had Rex's attention again. Until Rex's own private pain was passed.

"It's called the Battle of Half Axe Pass and you can imagine what the troopers call it." Col was quiet for a moment and his voice was soft. "We killed them. We killed them all. Then we killed the wounded. Then we killed those who had surrendered. We took their captured families, civilians, and sent them to Orvax IV as slaves to pay for our troubles." Col looked down at his hands. Like so many other brothers, he saw blood there. "And that was a little more killing and a little more slavery than I was willing to tolerate."

Rex nodded. "Then what?"

"I didn't desert then. I requested a transfer to Kaliida Medical Station. I have, had a secondary designation of files maintenance. I never thought I want to use it but after what we did, being called a desk jockey or flimsi floozy by some so-called 'hard-core' trooper wasn't going to be difficult at all."

Rex nodded and gestured to the scars on Col's knuckles. "And if it did bother you, there was always one-on-one."

Col looked at the back of his big hands, at the scars there. "I was always good at hand-to-hand. It came in helpful on Dantooine. I was too wounded to fight, but showed Ehveen's eldest brother a few moves. He chose me to be his second, giving advice, at the Culling Fair." Col smiled. "He won his section and that gave us…" He stopped at the 'us' and looked at Rex.

Rex gave him a small nod and a barely perceptible smile. Col somehow knew he'd already passed his debrief.

"That gave us breeding rights to one of the top nerf bulls in the hemisphere. He later told me that he wouldn't have won without my advice." Col smiled, good memories pulling at him.

"Back up to files, Col."

Col sighed. "I have to back up even further. Before New Plympto, the 187th was sent to Ryloth, to free the city of Lessu with the 91st Recon. While looking for the freedom fighters, we came across a battlefield. There were markers all over the place, a lot of them for troopers. It was where General Di, Captain Keeli and River Company made their last stand." Col shook his head. "It hurt to think that so many brothers died. An entire company. After we'd taken the planet, I went back to those markers. There was an old woman there. She pointed out markers for me, told me what they said, why some faced sunward or had a little knob on top. They buried General Di there, facing sunward for bravery, all the trooper graves faced sunward."

He paused, took a deep breath. "There were three trooper markers with little knobs on top, though one knob had been carefully removed and set beside the marker. I asked her what those meant. 'Lineage', she told me. 'So their mothers can show their children where they are buried'." Col's face twisted as he tried to hid his tears. "I hadn't received the holovid from Ehveen and so the very idea of one of us having children was a shock. I asked about the toppled knob; that was a child that had died. The mother'd had no milk because of starvation, the privations of war. I gave the old woman my rations and told her I'd come back with more for the mothers. I did, too." Col sighed. "We stayed on Ryloth for about a year and for about a year, I supplied those two mothers with whatever I could. The Twi'leks were receiving supplies from the Republic but there were always more people than supplies. I received the holovid when I was on Ryloth and it seemed like a good omen. To know she was pregnant with my child while I was helping the children of those two dead troopers."

Rex nodded. "Files?" he asked softly.

Col nodded and continued. "After New Plympto and my request for a transfer, they sent me to Kaliida Medical. The main problem with files is you get a lot of time to think. After Ryloth, all I could think of was Ehveen and my child, those two children on Ryloth. I checked to see if there were any troops headed to Dantooine. I'd transfer to go there, but it was a dead issue. I hadn't seriously though about deserting. Not really, quite serious." Col glanced down, his hands were shaking. He rubbed them together.

"The other problem with files is they can be read; have to be read for maintenance and disposal. You would think the dead don't leave loose ends." Col was quiet, his face twisting in odd ways, his fingers interlocked, a thumb rubbing a scarred knuckle. "All battalions were required to send all the dead trooper remains, such as could be acquired, back to Kamino." Col's expression was distasteful. "Some of the dead troopers weren't … as dead as you would think."

Rex took a sharp inhale. Col, having begun, couldn't stop.

"Brain dead was dead. Seventy percent loss of cerebral function was dead. Seventy-five percent loss of mobility was dead. Paralysis from the T-7 vertebra or higher was dead. Blindness was dead. Deafness was dead." Tears rolled down Col's cheeks though he didn't notice. "It was cumulative."

"I came across Rider's file. I'd known him on Ryloth and, while he wasn't a good friend, I had known him. So I read his file. He'd taken a grenade blast. Most of his injuries were easily healed in a bacta tank. Except he'd lost an eye and eighty percent of his hearing, so he was marked dead and his 'remains' sent back to Kamino." Col sighed. "Then his file showed that he'd been re-assigned back to the 187th. And the 212th. And the 33rd TAC. As well as on Kamino marked 'Waiting reassignment'."

A chill ran through Rex's spine.

"That's when I decided to desert. That's when I decided to return to Dantooine and never think about Kamino or clones or war ever again." Col bent his head into his hands sobbing. Rex rubbed his back between his shoulder blades. "That's enough for now, Col." He said softly. "We'll reconvene after lunch."

Col, his eyes still red and his emotions still jangled, could tell that Rex was as glad for the break as he was.

Lunch, as usual, was bread and thin-sliced nerf for sandwiches with an assortment of condiments and fruit. Nothing was needed but hands and Col was glad to not have to return to camp for his plate. Sketch and Kayl were on the front porch, the dejarit board between them, a couple of men behind each competitor offering advice. Dare was holding a sandwich, presumably for Kayl, looking at it wistfully.

Rex was sitting with Ahsoka, a half-eaten sandwich in hand, with his son, Barin, climbing over him. Rex was laughing, trying to keep the sandwich from dropping as he tried to hold Barin back in one arm. Barin was laughing, reaching for the sandwich. Col watched for a while before looking to where Cut and Suu sat together, talking softly. Col noticed Suu touched Cut a lot; sometimes on the arm, sometimes on his face. He could see how much Cut loved those touches. He knew he'd loved to be touched that way by Ehveen.

Col made himself a sandwich and went in search of either Fives or Echo – whichever man was with his family. He needed to learn how a family behaved.

Rex was waiting when Col returned. "Sorry, sir." He winced as Rex ignored him. "Sorry for the delay, Rex."

"No problem," Rex smiled. "I just sat down myself." He turned serious. "I'd like your permission to talk to others about your files experience on Kaliida."

"It's yours, Rex." I don't want those memories. Discuss them with whomever and whenever you feel right."

"Thank you, Col." Rex looked at his hands. "How about cooking, Col? If you were dropped in the middle of nowhere, could you manage to feed yourself?"

Col laughed. "I helped prepare nerf and bantha from live animal to grill. In the middle of nowhere on Dantooine; I could manage to collect a decent selection of vegetables and fruits; more than enough for survival. Anywhere else?" Col scratched his chin. "I'd have to find work. It would depend on the planet, but I could always do manual labor, light mechanics, butchering nerf or bantha. I could teach fighting, there's always someone paying for that. I wouldn't want to, but I could also do office work, bodyguarding, bar bouncer or fighting if I had to. I wouldn't do bounty hunting."

Rex nodded. "Decent enough ideas. How about money, Col? Have you ever handled money? Ever bought anything?"

Col nodded. "It felt pretty weird. But Ehveen and I would go into the small store to purchase things her family needed. One of the purchases seemed pretty large, until I realized that she was ordering an entire quarter's worth of dry goods, supplies, replacement parts. For that, she issued a voucher then went to the bank to issue the credits then returned back to the store with the credit slip. Let me tell you, that was tedious. Mostly, though, it was small purchases. I did some odd work, small engine maintenance, when I was recovered enough and received some credits. I did buy a few small things at the store, so I have done that. I gave most of the credits I earned to Ehveen for helping me." He paused. "She was angry and insulted. I didn't really understand the reason for a long time. I don't think I understand it completely now."

"What would you do now, in those same circumstances?"

Col smiled. "I give her a kiss like I'd never kissed her before. I'd tell her there was no way I could repay her; that my life was hers. The credits? I'd probably buy something small, maybe candy for the family kids, maybe some nice embroidery thread for her sister, maybe give them to her father for the clan."

Rex gave a soft laugh. "She'd probably accept that a lot better than credits."

"I know. One of her brothers told me how much I'd insulted her. I apologized to her and then I apologized for still not understanding." Col hung his head and sucked in the side of his lip. "That was about our last conversation before I left. At least, when I left she wasn't still angry. She understood that I was still a stranger to her ways. And she loved me."

How do you know that she loved you?

Col smiled. "Our last conversation didn't have any words."

Rex let that spoken memory soften the air; let Col wipe away his tears.

"Is there anything else you think I should know, anything else that might help us, anything else that I can help you understand or answer for you."

"No, sir." Col looked down at his hands. The invisible blood seemed paler, less evident.

There was one last thing. He reached out and grabbed Rex's arm in a brother's clasp, then tugged him forward his other arm going around Rex's shoulders. Rex hugged him back.

"Thank you, brother. Thank you, Rex."


	6. Interludes in the Thermal Pool

**Cut and Suu**

They were at the thermal pool, alone together. Fives had taken Keeli with a wink and they had shooed away Jek and Shaeeah. Jek had been easy; one of the men had promised to show him some wrestling moves and he'd run off to find Baffle.

Shaeeah, slightly older, more attune to her own growing sexuality, had caught the glimpses of fire in her father's eyes and the answering gleams in her mother's. Curiosity had kept her nearby, until her father had yelled aloud; that nothing was going to happen as long as she was hiding in the bushes and if nothing happened he wasn't going to be happy. Only then did she go and Cut had loved his wife in the warm waters.

Suu stroked her hand against Cut's cheek and her fingers combed into his thick hair as he held her, one strong arm around her, the other behind his head as they lay on a warm boulder. His satisfied smile warmed her heart. She laughed softly, needing to hear his words. "Are you happy, Cut?"

"More than I can say, Suu. I can't imagine what my life would be like. What I would be like without you." His face became contemplative. "Like my brothers here; do you think?" His thick brows came down as he frownd. "Having them here is painful in a way. It reminds me so much of my past. Reminding me of how I was. But it's also…" He paused, searching for the word and found it by looking at her face. "Hopeful."

He moved the arm from under his head and, turning toward her as she turned toward him, stroked her face with the back of his fingers. "I've learned so much from you. Not just from what you've shown me, but from dealing with you and the kids. I've gained understanding as well as knowledge, wisdom as well as intelligence."

She nodded, catching his fingers in her mouth and kissing them as he held them still for her. He slid his hand toward the back of her head, softly rubbing her lekku, squeezing gently. A sound of pleasure emanated from deep in her throat.

He smiled, joy crinkling the skin around his eyes as he kissed her, and then began nuzzling her neck "Especially Keeli. I had no idea a baby was that enlightening. Every time I hug him or tuck him in and sing him a lullaby, I want to come running to you. I want to run up to you and get on my knees and thank you for the magnificence of him."

She chuckled. "What keeps you from doing so?" He blushed as he brought his head to face her then smiled.

"Because it's usually not quite appropriate and the kids would get strange ideas." His grinned widened. "And, just imagine the effect on all my brothers."

She kissed him, her hands caressing his face, laughing. "Sometimes, I see that in your eyes, Cut. It just makes me weak all over. It makes me catch my breath. If you ever do drop to your knees, be prepared to catch me." Her face became thoughtful, she kissed him again then let go and pushed herself with a gentle move to drift to the middle of the pool. He watched her pink body shimmering in the ripples of the water, smiling. She floated. He sank. As she watched him, he raised an eyebrow lasciviously. She giggled and swam toward him, her arms curling around his neck, her fingers drinking in his warmth as she touched him. He held her to him, simply feeling the touch of her skin against his, the beat of her heart against his chest.

"I love you, Suu. I would give you anything I can." He tilted his head and searched her face. "You've heard all this about sharing," his voice was soft. "If you want another man, I can share with my brothers." He gave a nervous laugh. "I never thought about it. You and the kids are everything I want. More," he laughed again, more fully. "More than I can handle at times."

She chuckled softly. "I have never thought of sharing you, Cut and I do not want anyone but you.  I look at you and I am very possessive." Suu reached her face to his, her arms on either side of his hips as she floated above him. "And I desire no one else." Softly she stole a kiss from his lips. "But there is something I do want."

"What, Suu?" He stole back the kiss, leaning back on the stone so she was barely above him, supported by the water and admiring the things buoyancy did to a woman's body.

"Another child." Her words were soft in his ear. He sat up slowly, the weight of her body settling on his as he moved.

"Suu, I don't want to lose you." His arms held her as his face twisted in pain. "You could have died. If Jester hadn't been there ..." Cut left the sentence unfinished, though the memory of seeing her convulsing, pale and incoherent, on the floor slammed in his mind. "To go through that again..." He closed his eyes tightly, hugging her tightly; then opened his brown eyes to her blue ones and slowly shook his head.  "I can't do that again, Suu."

"Just because it happened once doesn't mean it will happen again." Suu spoke in a low voice. "I've spoken with Dr. Chymdura. His opinion is the problem was caused by the overwork and Saria agrees. That was a bad season for us, Cut; a lot of work. Do you think that would be a problem this season or the next?" Her smile was bemused and her eyes sparkled.

Cut opened his mouth to object and then closed it with a sigh. He hugged her closer, turning both of them on their sides, the warmth of her body a charm against bad thoughts. "No," he murmured. "Jester's good and knows the farm now. As for help," he gave a soft laugh. "I think most of my brothers will be here for the next couple of seasons. Some, probably," his eyes were sad, "until they die. We'll have to temporarily expand just to keep them busy. Find them some work somehow. Maybe a luxury crop – labor intensive. Good, hard work."

Suu nodded. "Boil, Waxer and Numa will be here for a while. Waxer is talking in terms of years and if Boil or Numa disagree, they haven't said so. Numa, Shaeeah and Jek could take over most of my work if there was any indication of a problem and Saria will probably be here also."

"I love you, Suu. I don't know what I would do without you. I don't know if I could go on." His eyes were soft. "I'd have to be there; for Keeli especially, but also for Jek and Shaeeah. They're not quite grown. But I'd only be half a man." He laid his forehead on her shoulder. "Less even than when I'd been a clone trooper. Now I know the value of what I have."

He kissed her shoulder, found her neck interesting for another nuzzle, then another kiss on her lips. He leaned back, she rolled onto her back in the water, and he pulled her next to him; partially held by the water, partially by his arm around her. It offered an interesting view of her anatomy interspersed with the ripples of movement. Buoyancy! He softly growled his appreciation in her ear. She reached back to curve her arms around his neck.  He twisted one arm around her waist, holding her close to him.

He rubbed his chin with a finger. He needed a shave. He'd been staying in the camp with his men and not taking any privileges beyond what they had. Ahsoka had brought in grooming supplies so they had those now. Already, some of the men were clean-shaven. He'd shave, Suu like his face clean. His hair he'd leave long for her fingers to comb.

"I think it's about time to start taking Shaeeah into town more often when I go. Jek too, occasionally. They both need to learn. They’re not kids anymore."

"You're right. They do need to learn." She curled deeper into his arms, her fingers caressing his bare chest. "I can't promise anything, Cut. Neither can you. Neither of us can promise more than now. I love you. I will love you until I die."

He nodded. "I will die with your name on my lips and, hopefully, your warm kisses there, too," he promised and she smiled. Cut kissed her then looked into her eyes thoughtfully.

"I did love the way you felt in my hands while you were pregnant. I loved feeling Keeli move in your belly." His fingers spread over her flat belly, lingered, feeling her delightfully pink skin. "I'd love another child, too. I'm just scared for you."

Her blue eyes looked at him, drinking in his features, memorizing every line of his face as she did most days. "And I'm scared for you, Cut. Every time you go into town, I'm afraid someone, some bounty hunter, will recognize you and try to collect." She leaned her forehead on his chest; just the thought of losing him brought tears to her eyes. "I'm afraid one day you will not come home. But I don't stop you from going because you enjoy it. You enjoy the business end of the farm, taking the grain for sell, bargaining over the price. You're much better at it than I was. And I know that my fear is much larger than the actual odds of you being recognized."

He chuckled. "Chios says it was a bad day for him when he introduced me to you." He hugged her. "He always has a smile when he says it." His eyes narrowed for a moment, planning. "If Jester will supervise here at the farm, I can work at the warehouse for a season. Maybe two. Rex and Echo can supervise here as well. Shaeeah and Jek are well acquainted with this end of the business." He smiled at her. "A few extra credits are always useful and I'd be..."

"Cut! You'd be in the middle of town where anyone…" Suu objected until his lips covered hers. Only after he'd kissed her breathless did he continued.

"Where anyone could be talking and I'd hear it all." He kissed her quiet, then again, just because he loved her. "Any gossip, any news of someone 'new' in town. Any hint of Imperials or bounty hunters. It all goes to the work district first."

"Chios would want to know why you're working. We've been doing very well and he'd ask."

"That's easy, love." Cut whispered softly, his soft lips barely caressing hers, a smile on his face as his fingers caressed her belly. "We're hopeful for another child and babies always take extra money."

**Fives, Sula and Saoha**

Saoha laughed gently as she quickly swam away from Fives' grip.  He could swim, but it required more effort than he was willing to exert at the moment.

"Just wait until the next time it’s null grav in the ship, Sa'. I'll be coming after you." He laughed, shook droplets of water from his long hair and reached back to pull himself next to Sula on one of the warm boulders. Still, he watched Saoha. The green-blue water rippled over her dusty-rose body in wonderful patterns. Sula ran her hand through his hair, a question in her fingertips, and he murmured in contentment and laid his head on her thigh gazing into her dark eyes.

"I have two wonderful wives and, now, a beautiful baby girl." He answered. She leaned forward and kissed his forehead. He reached up and guided her lips to his.

"And your brothers are here and you are a hero to many of them." She felt that wonderfully deep contentment in his heart, the love and strength that simply seemed to overflow from him. It made him a very popular man on Zeltros. They'd met many people; singles, couples, families who'd offered to merge with them. He would have been safe on Zeltros, if confined to a single planet. He had decided to run before the emperor had consolidated his power over the Inner Rim. Sula and Saoha had come with him.  "You will always be a hero to me, Fives." Sula whispered into his ear.

Fives felt Saoha's hand and her cheek against his leg, her kiss on his ankle as she agreed with her sister. He reached down and curled his fingers in her hair. Remembering how furiously she'd attacked him when he'd first seen them, chained to a slaver's bed; giving her all in bed or battle. They had given their all to him. They were his heroes.  He had so much love. Sometimes Fives felt that if he flipped himself inside out, he could fill the galaxy overflowing with love.

"Come on up here, Sa'. Let's talk." He gave a gentle tug to a lock of her long, rose-purple colored hair.

Easily, she pulled herself on the stone to lie next to him, her head next to his on Sula's thigh, her hand on his chest. Sula smiled and began to braid her sister's hair. Fives softly stroked Saoha's lovely body. He was done for the day. He felt Saoha's question in her touch and grinned lustfully. Well, at least until after dinner.

"I've determined that we can manage with taking only one contract every twenty-five days and still come out slightly ahead for the next half-year." Fives said. "Ahsoka was pretty surprised, but relieved to find out she didn't have to pilot every other day. In the coming weeks, as we start to move some of the men, we can pick up side contracts. Col wants Dantooine and, as soon as we know the timeframe I'll get a delivery contract." Absently, he pulled Saoha closer to him and hooked his hand under Sula's leg, drinking in the familiarity of their bodies next to his. "I know we can't use Checkout, Backup or Riven as pilots but we can use them as navigators, co-pilots, and crew. So you wouldn't have to go every trip, Sa'."

Saoha nodded. "Riven wants, so badly, to get back on a ship. Each morning he goes up on the hill after breakfast and simply looks at the ship." She bowed her head, "Sometimes he cries, combined joy and want. He offered to help when I was realigning the breather gaskets but I had just finished."

Fives nodded. "Shall I talk to Ahsoka about taking Riven?" He gave Sa' a kiss, then relaxed his arm around her.

"If he's passed his physical and psyc by then," amended Sula. "Until then, Sa', I would say let him assist. Perhaps he has excellent mechanic skills as well."

"I shall let him know to work on those." Saoha sat up and moved behind her sister to run her fingers through her blue-black hair and braid curls into it. "And I will make sure to be working on something each morning. It will give him so much pleasure to assist."

Fives nodded, continuing. "I've told Rex that we'll be transporting the men free or at quarter point. He insists that we keep track and let him know how much our costs run. It's a matter of pride for him and I suspect he'll insist on paying." Fives smiled. "I've got my pride so he won't be paying any more than half."

Saoha spoke. "You'll have to allow Cut to make a contribution for his pride as well, so you won't be paying more than a third."

"I hadn't thought of that," frowned Fives. "I don't think Cut and Suu have a lot of credits; their credits were buried in the farm and equipment."

Sula smiled. "Insist that you and Rex pay him rental for the camping grounds and the barn. I can see a lot of late night calculations but very few actual credits changing hands."

Fives laughed, nodding

"Give every man his pride," Saoha's soft voice whispered as she wrapped her arms around her sister, softly nuzzling her neck. "Sign them on as crew to their destination and insist on Corellia union pay - half-point apprentice.  It would also be a reference for future work."

Fives chuckled. "Didn't I say I had two wonderful, brilliant wives?"

"I missed 'brilliant' the first time around," remarked Saoha. For a moment, she basked in the contentment and love of her sister and of her husband.

"Are you both going to be able to manage the emotions flowing around?" Fives voice was concerned.

"As long as you're around, Fives, to brace us, it won't be difficult." Saoha began another braid in Sula's hair.

Sula's agreed with a touch. "Ahsoka, Saria, Cut or Suu would be good also for stability. Rex, Echo, Cody to a lesser extent. Waxer, Chopper and Edge as well."

Fives raised an eyebrow. "Chopper?"

Saoha nodded. "Whatever you believe was wrong with him is no longer a problem. He has consolidated. He has his fears, but they are no longer what control him. He has started to explore who he is and he is coming to like himself."

"Whatever my wise wives say." He smiled. Some things were simply good to know. "Will you want us in the psyc evals with you or should one of us just be nearby," he gestured with his hand. "Say within, twenty meters of the barn?"

"Fifty would be fine, Fives," answered Sula.

"Except in a few extreme cases; Jesse, Riposte, Shy. We'd need you, possibly in the barn itself," continued Saoha.

Sula nodded, agreed in her touch and spoke. "Probably within five meters. And it will have to be you or Ahsoka."

Fives eyebrows rose. "They don't seem so emotionally ravaged as all that."

"They are afraid someone will see how badly they are injured. They are frightened they will be discarded. They are hiding from others and from themselves." Saoha smiled sadly. "Like Rex did, standing up to the pain because they know no other way or …"

"... because they can imagine worse or have known worse. They are bleeding inside, like Kayl, only emotionally." Sula moved her fingers as she started braiding a strand of his hair.

"I'll be there." he promised. "Sketch can care for the peach?"

"Sketch, any of Cut's family, Col. Aureki, Echo, Ahsoka. Probably some other of your brothers by then. Sketch is best," Sula smiled. "The little peach really likes him."

Fives laughed. "I'll tell him that."

"I like him, too." Saoha's voice was soft and she smiled. "I like so many of your brothers, Fives."

He turned to face her, Sula letting the braid slip from her fingers as he turned, to pick up another lock of his hair. He felt their contentment with all that life had to offer.

"So we come to this decision." Fives smiled. "Shall we add to our family?" He reached out, touching both of them, letting them see his satisfaction with them, with his child, with his life as it was; but also his willingness to add to his family, with his _delight_ they would choose from his brothers. The sharing of pleasure and the pleasure of sharing.

"I am open to sharing you," began Sula to both her sister and her husband. "Right now, I am taken with baby and have not looked for any interest and," she mock-glared at Fives. "I am piqued that your brothers have not found me of interest."

Saoha giggled. "You've spent all your time in the med barn; they haven't seen your beauty, only your determination. When you're out in the back yard, you have baby peach with you and she's feeding. Most of them studiously avoid looking at that so they cannot see you. Truly Sula, let them see you without the baby and they'll take an interest." Softly she stroked the underside of Sula's full, heavy breasts with a finger, gently cupping them in her hands as she leaned against her sister's back. "Most of them would give their left arm to do even so much as that, sister."

Sula smiled. "And you, sister. Have you found interest among Fives' brothers?"

"So much interest, my wonderful sister." Saoha released her sister from the hug and lay back on the rock, feeling its eternal warmth. "From a desire to simply run his fingers through my hair, which I shall grant tonight; from a desire to have an innocent hug to desires that make my blood run hot and make me come in search of Fives and breathlessly pull him to privacy." She rolled closer to Fives. "To the first tentative wisps of love."

"Really, Saoha, you'll have to search for me a little harder. I'm willing." Fives grinned, pulled her closer and kissed her neck. "I'm more than willing," he whispered lustily, running his tongue against her skin.

"I am willing to open our family," Saoha nibbled Fives shoulder and ran her hand over his chest.

"As am I, and honored you'd chose from my brothers." Fives nibbled Saoha's ear then sat to give Sula a kiss, sliding his tongue between her lips. She sucked softly on his tongue and he felt her hand slide up to little brother to give him an affectionate brush of her fingertips.

Maybe before dinner. He stood and sighed. "I think our time here is up. I hear the next group coming." He looked down at his beautiful, desirable, brilliant wives. Dusty rose Saoha, ruby red Sula. There was no man as lucky as he. "Can you tell which group?"

"Medical," answered Saoha. "Kix, Edge, Dare, Kaver and Riposte."

"Are you going to stay? Flirt with them?" He asked with his pirate's smile, several unfinished braids in his hair.

"Not for long," answered Sula. "Baby peach will want me soon." She smiled into her husband's gaze. "But for a while." She glanced at Saoha. "To see if there is any interest for me without our peach."

Saoha smiled. "A long while for me, I think."

"If you wish to enjoy another man tonight," began Fives.

Saoha shook her head. "They are not settled or sure yet. Perhaps in the coming days." She smiled her beautiful smile. "But I will be here for a while; perhaps until after dinner depending on the next group. Dare has a wonderful turn of mind that has become sharper as he can't speak, sweet innocent Kaver blushes wonderfully, Riposte needs loving touches." She waved at the group coming into view but still a distance from the cave opening. "Edge is simply…" she shrugged, lapsing into Zeltron, "k'u htwa. And Kix," she smiled at her handsome husband, "Kix would enjoy _your_ company immensely."

"And I would enjoy yours tonight, wife." He told her quietly and kissed her softly on her head. Fives pulled on his pants, tossing his shirt over his shoulders and turned to the oncoming group. "Hi Kix, Edge, all. Would you mind if Sula and Saoha stayed with you a little longer into your time? Sula's…"

"We'd love their company, Fives. You, too if you'd like," replied Kix. There were nods of agreement from the men as they began divesting themselves of their shirts. Only Edge had no hesitation with removing his pants in front of the women and Fives wondered what that Zeltron word, 'k'u htwa' meant. He considered himself fairly fluent, but he hadn't heard that word. Absently, he waved his hand in negation.

"Would love to, but I have a few tasks to do before dinner, like rescuing Sketch from our little golden peach," he laughed.

"Don't bother," came Edge's gravelly voice as he lowered himself slowing into the hottest area of the pool with little hisses of pleasure. "He adores her."

Fives smiled as he strode off; even as he saw Sula hold her hand out to the battered and wary Riposte, inviting him to sit, and Saoha settling herself between silent Dare and dour Edge. Kix was removing the sling from Kaver's arm and, for a moment, Fives eyed him speculatively.

**Boil and Waxer**

Boil lay against the stones in the hottest part of the pool he could stand. His eyes were closed, his arms spread out and his head back. There was a lazy half-smile on his relaxed face, he looked several years younger. Sexual satisfaction filled his body; satisfaction of a totally different sort filled his heart.

Cut had said these boulders were warmed by subterranean lava influx that in a thousand thousand years or so would fill the little cave. Boil didn't know, he didn't care. It was luxurious. He'd worry in a thousand thousand years.

"Boil,"

"Hmm?" asked Boil.

"What are we going to do about Numa?"

Boil partially opened one eye to look at his brother, his partner, his some-time lover, his other half. Waxer was standing, chest deep in the water, droplets clinging to his skin, a frown on his face.

Boil chuckled, Waxer had grown his hair in Boil's absence, but he'd convinced Waxer to return to a shaved head as soon as grooming supplied had been handed out. He found it so much more attractive. Although, he preferred his women lovers with long tresses to wrap his fingers in. Still, he'd seen Asajj Ventress once, taking on Kenobi, and he'd never been so hard for a woman. Maybe that had been because of her movement; she had moved like lightning wrapped in satin. Fives, with his long wavy hair and pirate air, was also attractive. Boil would love to wrap his fingers in Fives hair, holding him. He wondered how much Fives and his wives shared, absently calculating permutations adding himself and Waxer. He breathed in deeply, remembering the curve of Sula's heavy breasts, a dark blood red curve contrasting against the golden peach curve of her daughter's skin as she fed the infant. _Face it, Boil,_ he told himself, _if it's human..._

"Question. Boil, resident sex maniac. Pay attention." Waxer's voice was amused and his frown had turned into a lop-sided smile. They'd spent a long time apart from each other. More time apart than together and Boil knew Waxer had been afraid Boil had changed.

He hadn't, not in ways that counted to Waxer. He was more brittle than hard, more pained than steady these days. He'd gone on at least one run every night since they'd landed on Saleucami. It had been hard years for Boil as much as for his imprisoned brothers. Perhaps harder; they'd at least, had each other. Boil had stood alone, surrounded by men who would have tortured him for his very thoughts, helping men who would kill him because they didn't know his loyalty. One night he had quietly asked Waxer to simply hold him. That had been so unlike the Boil Waxer had thought he'd known.

"Paying attention, Waxer.  What do you mean?"

"She's growing up." Waxer retorted.

"I noticed." Boil smiled at Waxer, "She's becoming a very graceful, strong, confident, beautiful woman. You've done a good job. I wish I could take more of the credit." Waxer smiled absently. Boil continued. "Is her growing up a problem?"

"Maybe," muttered Waxer.

"We could always marry her off on Ryloth, Waxer, if it bothers you that much."

"This is serious, Boil."

"I am taking this seriously, Waxer. But I haven't been here for years." Boil sat up on the boulder, bringing up one knee, locking his arms around it. "I don't know how things are anymore. I have to rely on your judgment, relying on you like we've always done with each other."

Waxer sighed. He leaned back in the hot water, letting himself fall and sink, then standing. He liked the feel of sinking, the inevitability of slowing moving to the bottom. Then he pushed himself up. He shook water droplets from his face and wiped his face with his hands. "I'm scared, Boil. Scared that somehow we'll mess up her life."

"That's a possibility, Waxer. But unlikely. We love her too much to do something that will ruin her life. She's too strong to let us."

"Have you thought about the future?" Waxer leaned on the warm boulder, his chin on his arms.

Boil sighed. "Not much. I left that to you and mostly thought about staying alive and coming back to the two of you." Waxer reached out, his hand clasping Boil's leg.

"You're back, Boil. You're alive." Waxer's voice was reassuring. Boil smiled and, bending to the water, put his arm around Waxer's shoulder.

"Come up here, _nerra_. Tell me." This was family, taking on each other's worries.

Waxer gracefully mounted the boulder sitting next to Boil. Boil gently traced a white scar on Waxer's back, stretching almost from one shoulder to his opposite hip. Boil had almost lost him then.

That scar had been an argument between them. Boil had disliked scars, had mocked men with visible scars, even his commander, though that only in privacy with Waxer. "Slow _di'kut_ ," he'd mutter, claiming he'd never have a lover with those kind of scars. Waxer taking that scar had wiped the arrogance from Boil.

"Watch her, sometime. When she's watching me or if you can catch her, watching you." Waxer said thoughtfully after a moment.

"What am I looking for?"

Waxer shook his head. "You'll see it. She stares at me and, yesterday I caught her staring at you the same way. Just staring, contemplating. Sometimes sadly. That's when I know she's thinking about our ages. Sometimes fiercely and I have no idea what she's thinking then, but I wouldn't want to get in her way. Sometimes she has a look that will just embed itself in your heart and stay there." Waxer stared at the water, frowning.

Waxer was silent for a moment and Boil, knowing his brother, waited.

"Once, I happened to glance into a mirror and saw a look on Numa's face that matched the look Suu gives Cut or Ahsoka gives Rex."

Boil sighed. "Wouldn't that be kind of normal? We're her _nerra_ , her brothers and guardians and protectors all rolled into one.

"Just be on the watch for it, Boil." Waxer scratched his face. "I don't think she wants us as brothers and guardians. Maybe we can ask Saria or one of Fives wives to have a talk with her?"

Boil raised an eyebrow.

"I'm serious, Boil."

"I'll see to it, Waxer. I'll ask one of them." Boil smiled as he lay back on the boulder, his head on Waxer's arm. He'd been subtle with the lovely Saria. Perhaps he would talk with her again. He should teach her to share. There were so many more permutations in sharing; so much more to receive, so much more to give.

He and Waxer were an excellent example, a balanced pair; Waxer's patience in contrast to his eagerness, Waxer's introspection to his action-oriented view, Waxer's volubility to his aloofness. Waxer was a kind and generous lover, a good father, a hard worker, someone you could depend on. An excellent partner in all things. And himself? Boil laughed. He was lucky.

On the other hand, if he went to Sula or Saoha this time, he could flirt with her, find out how much she and her family shared. He could feel warmth flow through his body, centering on his groin and he purred deep in his throat.

"Resident sex maniac, indeed," muttered Waxer at his side.

**Chopper and Saria**

"Will you come down to the thermal pool with me, Saria?" asked Chopper. "Near evening?" He grinned confidently but his tone was nervous. "Just the two of us."

"How'd you manage that?" she asked with a smile and he knew she'd be there. She saw his shoulders relax; his eyes crinkle at the corners.

"I traded duties with the other men in camp. Except Cody. He gave it as a gift." His face got a distant look. "Sometime, I'd like to talk about gifts."

"Maybe this evening? At the pool." she offered and he nodded.

He was there, in the water when she arrived and she knew he'd planned that. Scars covered his shoulders like a mantle. In the crystal clarity of the water she could see that he was naked and the scars wandered down his body. She almost mistook his scars for ripples in the water. He watched her observe his scars, waiting for ... _What,_ she wondered. She saw his maleness and, blushing, looked away.

"I, uh, calibrated my deece, earlier and, unless you do something pleasantly unexpected, I'm good." He turned his head, a soft red coloring his cheeks. He'd heard about Djinn's embarrassment. "And if you do something pleasantly unexpected," he laughed. "That would be good, too." "Come on in, the water's fine. I'll keep my eyes closed while you get in."

She laughed at that. "That water's so clear, it won't matter."

"Probably true. But I know there's a difference between being seen in air and being seen in water."

_Yes, he would know._ "Ok, no peeking," she admonished playfully.

"Now where's the fun in that?" he joked and she laughed. It was a common catchphrase she'd heard from some of the troopers. She turned her back and pulled her shirt over her head. Then, just as quickly, removed her soft, cotton pants. He had peeked; she heard his sharp intake of breath when she'd bent to remove her pants. She slipped into the hot water, a slow volley of ecstatic groans coming from her throat. "That. Feels. So. Good."

"Been busy? Overworked?" he asked, his eyes shut again.

"Yes. I've been researching pre-op for Sketch. It's lots of deep concentration and reading. I have the bad habit of leaning on my elbows with my cheeks in my hands." She was in the water and glanced at his face, amused to find his eyes still shut. "You can open your eyes, Chopper." They remained closed and he pulled on his lower lip with this teeth.

"I was wondering," he asked softly. "If you'd sit beside, rather than across from me. It would be easier to look in your eyes, when we talk, instead of me staring at you."

She moved, making her own ripples in the water, swimming the depth of the middle. He'd opened his eyes partly when she hadn't replied and at the noise of her movement. He reached out his hand. Chopper could see her body through the water. The ripples only made it interesting. When Saria was close enough, he took her hand and pulled her closer, observing that breasts floated.

He was quiet.

"Thinking about calibrating that deece again?" she asked with a grin, having seen his look at her breasts.

He laughed. "No, I haven't got that far yet. I was wondering what to talk about and how to swim."

"Don't you swim?" she asked.

He shook his head. "No. Almost drowned in a river once but that's about as close to swimming as I've been."

"Cut swims, but says it's exhausting and not something he'd do for fun. I'd do it for fun."

Chopper shrugged. "Maybe it's our muscle ratio. It's slightly different for us than for a human. Denser bone, too. Maybe that makes a difference."

"You're human."

He shrugged. "Some people don't think so." He ducked his head. "I do like null gravity practice. That's fun. Maybe that's like swimming."

Saria's eyes were wide. "Null gravity? With rocket packs? That must be exciting."

"It is. Especially when they give us the rockets before we're really ready for them." He grinned.

"Ouch." She winced in imaginary sympathy.

Chopper laughed. "Yeah, it was like that. Twenty cocky guys who thought they knew how to fly. My first day I ended up blue and purple, aching all over, but the physical freedom was wonderful. Eventually, I became very good." His face became solemn.

"Sad thoughts," she asked.

"Sort of, sort of not. Wistful thoughts, maybe. Or nostalgic." He shrugged, speaking softly. "Just wondering where some of those guys are now. Sinker was one. He was good. Boil helped him out. None of the other guys I trained with are on either list."

"I'm sorry." Her hand touched his arm, near his wrist. He hesitantly turned his hand palm up and her fingers slid into his hand, intertwining with his fingers. He breathed deeply, simply looking at their intertwined fingers.

"Thank you."

She wasn't sure if it was for the words or for the touch.

"Show me some swimming. If you would, Saria?" he asked before the silence became embarrassing.

"Certainly, but you'll have to …" she lifted their joined hands.

"If I must." He grinned as he released her hand. He was happy, as if nothing else in his life had been so carefree. She dove under the surface of the water before tears could show.

He watched as she swam in the water. Sometimes she dove into the deepest part of the pool and Chopper, worried, watched her carefully, calculating that even if he sank, he could still climb the boulders to the water's surface within a few seconds, the key being to not panic. Mostly she swam back and forth, sometimes in the water and sometimes under, looking like some mythical undine enjoying the freedom of near-weightlessness. The ripples made it very tantalizing.

Saria returned to the stone he was sitting on and sat next to him, wringing the water from her sandy blonde hair, water droplets on her skin. Her entire body was flushed with the exercise. He dropped his face and she laughed softly, tilting her face below his. He raised his head with a smile.

"Better," she said. "Why do you do that?"

"Different reasons. It used to be because I didn't want people to notice the scars. That didn't work much," He chuckled. "But with my head down I didn't have to see their eyes. Then, because I was ashamed of being me. I thought I was deficient in some way." He thought a moment. "Those were bad times for the most part. I couldn't understand why my sergeant was never satisfied with me. I worked hard." He frowned and Saria could tell there was still regret. He shrugged. "He was playing with my mind, keeping me unsettled. I was being groomed for failure and got a bit … self-destructive.  That was his aim. But that's where I first met both Jester and Sketch." He looked at her for a moment. "After that the 501st took me. Rex and Ahsoka worked hard to re-make me back into a good trooper. I didn't understand why they bothered because I was a deficient failure just waiting for a decent death. So, I'd drop my head because I didn't know how else to react to honest praise." He leaned back, silent. He looked at her and she knew he couldn't continue his story then. "I guess now its habit."

His arm came up around her and then paused before his skin touched her.

"Go on, it's one of the nice things about sitting together." she encouraged softly.

He let his arm hugged her loosely. "What else is nice about it?"

"We have that face to face," she turned her head, watching him. He was delighted, embarrassed, hesitant, inexperienced, wanting … it all showed on his face.

"The closeness is nice." She moved the short distance between them. His arm naturally tightened around her. "There are some other advantages we may get into later."

"I can see one." He said softly, staring at her lips.

"That is one of the best," she admitted. This time, she ducked her head. She wasn't ready for kisses. Not yet.

Chopper was quiet, his eyes watching her. One eye was a golden brown, the other a pale yellow green. There were some milky inclusions in his green eye. The medical portion of her mind diagnoses partial blindness in that eye. She was getting use to the way one scar interacted with his grin, getting use to the way his eyes sparkled when he saw her, getting use to the way he anticipated needs. Under the angry red scars on his face were old, silvered ones; not quite as even as the new ones. He saw her watching his face.

"The prison guards decided that fate hadn't been symmetrical enough," he said softly.

"May I touch them." she asked. "Not professionally, but curiously?" He thought about that for a moment, his brows furrowed, understandably hesitant to offer his scars to a stranger's fingers. "To touch your skin," she elucidated softly, "to touch and feel you." He nodded slowly.

"Though I have other scars that I'd much rather you touch." he said with a quick glance downward and then into her eyes.

"That, my dear Chopper, is an outrageously flirtatious statement." she said as she smiled. He smiled back as he sank down in the pool a bit so she could touch him without too much stretching. Her fingers traced the old scars first. On his face back by his jaw, moving up to his cheek under his eye in a vague X and up toward his forehead. His scars moved into his hairline and she combed her fingers through his short hair feeling the track of the pebbled skin.

"Oh! It's where your hair is silver," she exclaimed. He shrugged a shoulder.

"I was thinking about shaving it again." he said. "I kept my head and face shaved when I was a trooper. It became habit. It's much easier to care for in the field, less prone to pests or catching in the helmet electronics. And the scars," He thought a moment. "Intimidated the rookies, made them listen to me. They didn't make me a sergeant until right before the whole mess; but Rex had me lead a squad now and then or put me in with a rookie sergeant because I was experienced." He smiled and Saria noticed the pride in his voice.

"I like it." Her fingers combed through his hair.

"It stays." He decided, his eyes closed. "Especially if you run your fingers like that through it often. Or even occasionally. That feels good."

"Another flirtatious statement, Chopper. Perfectly, uniquely you. You'll get no sympathy from me when you complain about not being able to flirt. You do it very well." He blushed, to her amusement.

Her finger started tracing his new scars. They were far more symmetrical, three X marks; above his eye, below his eye and one on his lower cheek beside his mouth. She frowned at the cruelty, her fingers resting on his face.

"Why did they do that, Chopper? Why did they cut you and rip up Sketch's leg and beat Riposte and..."

"Because they could," came his reply. "Because they were allowed, encouraged, to show how much power they had over us traitors. Because they knew our ultimate destination was Kamino for reconditioning and destruction. Because they hated us. Only Boil's squad showed any restraint and now we know why. So they beat us; physically, mentally and emotionally. They raped us, killed us. They tried to find our weak points..." He stopped because he could feel her face pressed against the side of his head, hear her broken breathing, feel her fingers tremble. He reached up, touching her head and the back of her neck with his hand, holding it there.

"Hush, hush." he said, "We're here now. We're all right. It was a nightmare, but it's over." Her breathing softened.

"Would any of the other men have told me?" she whispered in his ear. "That it was systematic torture?"

"Not unless you asked directly."

Saria breathed softly, giving him a small kiss in his hair to his surprise, silently slid down beside him. Chopper straightened and put his arm around her again. She was closer this time, he noted, her skin against the scars on his side, her hip touching his. Slowly she hooked her ankle over his lower leg.

"Does that mean anything?" he asked.

Saria smiled. "If another female were here, it would tell her something. For you, it means I like touching you."

"I like it." He moved his leg a little, experimentally swinging it gently in the water. The weight of her foot was no more than reassurance. "It feels ... possessive."

Saria chuckled. "That's exactly what it tells other women." His eyebrows rose and he ducked his face a bit, but not before she noticed a quick smile.

"That's a good start, isn't it?" His face showed his uncertainty as he looked at her.

"That is a good start, Chopper." She answered. "So was the other day, talking with me in the back yard. Just talking. Getting to know each other. People have to be friends before there's anything worthwhile."

"I was afraid," Chopper admitted, his face down, looking at her from the corner of his pale green eye. "That my scars would scare you. No one else has scars this bad, except maybe Jesse's face. And he... “Chopper paused for a moment, shook his head." He won't approach you to flirt."

She turned a bit toward him and her right hand reached over, cupped his jaw, drawing him to face her. "Is that why you invited me to the pool first? So I would see them? So you could judge my reaction?"

"Yes. If you couldn't stand the scars, I didn't want to break my heart trying for something I couldn't reach. I know some women," he amended his sentence, "a lot of women, don't like scars. Not like mine, not all over."

"I might break your heart, Chopper, but it won't be because of scars." Her left hand moved to rest on his leg, on a large scar cut by gunship metal underlain by old burn. She leaned into him, turning her face to his, her hand moving from his jaw to the side of his face, drawing him, more gently now, but closer, until her breath caressed his lips. That awful _uncertainty_ stopped him. He lowered his head before her lips touched his.

"I'd like to kiss you, Saria. I've had bad experiences before where I've misunderstood, where I've been teased, so I need to ask." He swallowed, licked his lips. "May I kiss you?" His breath shivered.

_Teased? Misunderstood? This close?_ Saria felt a flash of hatred for someone she'd never met.

"Yes, Chopper. Please." She answered, leaning into him, her face still raised for his lips, her eyes gazing into his.

He put his lips to hers; soft and warm and moist. He kissed her lower lip, trailed some kisses onto her cheek and down her neck. She could feel him shake in tension and she knew that calibrating his deece hadn't been sufficient. A soft laugh rolled in her throat. He pulled away from her, his eyes inspecting her face.

"That wasn't at me?" he asked slowly, his emotions hidden, his face hard. She tilted her head.

"I don't know." She said honestly. "I was just thinking about..." she blushed ..."you. Calibrating your deece."

He thought a moment, relaxed a bit. Then he grinned.

"Another calibration will be due soon, I suspect." He gave her another kiss, in relief that she hadn't been laughing at him.

"Chopper," she asked softly. "Am I the first woman, the first person, you've kiss."

He leaned back, chagrinned. "It shows, huh?" She nodded slowly.

"Would you like me to kiss you?" Her voice was low. She had never considered herself an experienced woman. Jester hadn't been her first man, but he had been her first in over a decade."

"Please.".

She gently placed her palm on his cheek, raised her lips to him and kissed him softly. At the end of the kiss, she pulled on his lower lip gently with her teeth. He made a noise of discovery and pleasure in the back of his throat.

She leaned forward and kissed him again, this time slipping her tongue between his lips. His eyes shot open and he shivered, his arms coming tight around her.

She kissed him a third time, her tongue going deeper into his mouth, teasing, inviting his tongue to play. Slowly, his tongue came to touch hers.

He withdrew from her, nodding. Then he kissed her, tugging her lip, teasing her tongue. His arms around her were tight and shaking. She had to tap him twice on the arm, the martial arts version of surrender that Jester had taught her, for him to release her sufficiently to breath.

"You try to make me breathless with kisses, not from lack of oxygen," she teased. It took him a moment, his face flickering from hard to uncertainty, but he chuckled.

"I'll be more careful." He promised.

"I like your strength, I love being safe in strong arms, so don't be too 'careful'." She warned. He nodded as he softly ran his hands up her sides, her ribs. She grabbed his wrists. "Careful of ticklish spots" she said with a laugh. He laughed with her.

There was a moment's pause. If he'd been looking at her breasts, she wouldn't have done so. But he was gazing into her eyes with happiness. She took his hands and slid them up to her breasts. Slowly she straddled his thigh, facing him, as breathless as he was.

He shook, his body quivering. "Please. More kisses?" He asked. His hands hadn't move from her breasts. "So I know it’s ok." He whispered softly.

"Yes, Chopper." She leaned forward, her arms coming around his scarred shoulders, "It's ok." Her lips caressing his face, catching his lips, slipping her tongue into his mouth. He moaned, he was hard, pressed against her leg. One arm slid down to her waist. With his other hand, he gently stroked her breast. He watched in amazement as her nipple wrinkled into a tight bud.

"That's a good sign," she confided with a smile. "It means what you've done is pleasurable." He was reaching for the other breast with his fingers. "Try your mouth," she whispered into his ear.

"Just your words," he groaned. "Just your words make me harder." He pulled her closer to him, up a bit, and set his mouth to her breast. At first, just the nipple as he tongued it experimentally, then he set his mouth around her entire breast. Softly he used his teeth, but not softly enough and she jerked back.

"I'm sorry, Saria." He seemed panicked. "I'm so sorry. I won't do it again." She could feel his erection wilt beside her leg.

"It's ok, Chopper." She put her hands to his face. "Chopper, it was just a little too much. That's part of what lovemaking is about; finding out what your partner likes and wants." He was listening now, his expression uncertain. "And finding out what is just a little too much. Or not enough."

"I'm sorry, Saria. For ..." he couldn't find the words.

"For not being experienced?" she asked. "There's no reason to be sorry for that. I'm not very experienced myself."

He smiled at her. "Thanks." She kissed him on the forehead, an innocent kiss.

He laughed, gently touched her two wrinkled nipples with his hands cupping around her breasts. He leaned forward, kissing her, slipping his tongue into her mouth to play with hers.

Her hands slid on his chest, feeling the ridges of his scars. He shivered. "You don't have to touch me." He offered between kisses.

"It wouldn't be much fun without touching."

He pulled away from her. "I will make it as fun as I can for you, Saria."

He was a fast learner, listening to her breathing, the little catches when something felt _good_ beyond belief. He was getting hard again, pressing against her leg, thickening, lengthening. Her hands reached down into the water and he gasped and froze as her fingers touched him. He sucked his lips between his teeth.

His breathing quivered. "I want…" he whispered."… You."

"I know," she whispered into a kiss, buried her head into his shoulder. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have … started kissing you."

He rubbed her back with his hand, knowing they would go no further. "No complaints from me, Saria. Please don't think I'm complaining. I loved those kisses. Loved touching your breasts. Loved what you've shown me." Chopper paused. "I loved watching you swim, loved talking to you." He licked his lips, glanced down, then into her eyes. "I loved the feel of your fingers on my face, my scars."

His throat was suddenly dry. "I will see you tomorrow at breakfast, but suddenly, that's not soon enough."

Saria touched him softly on the face. Then dropped her fingers to his hardness. "Tonight," she smiled and her eyes sparkled, "when you calibrate your deece…"

He chuckled, his big hand moving down to touch her fingers on him.

"Imagine that it's me."

He groaned and she took that groan into her lips, into her mouth, sucking softly on his lips. He could feel her heart beating, fluttering quickly.

Chopper watched as she swam to the other side of the pool. He didn't close his eyes this time. Nor did she turn around as he pulled on her pants, dropped the shirt over her head.

He'd think of her tonight. He had her kisses on his lips, the touch of her hand on his body. He knew it had been a good start; a very good start indeed.

He wondered if the feelings inside him were love.

**Shaeeah & Quad **

Shaeeah saw Quad by the tree. He seemed to be having trouble urinating. He leaned against the tree with one hand bracing himself and the other tugging in front of him. Softly, he rocked back and forth. His eyes were closed and he was large, stretched, reaching upward. She was close enough to ask if he needed help before she recognized what he was doing as masturbation.

Sometimes at night, she put her own hand between her legs and it felt good; sometimes she rubbed her breasts or pinched her nipples in experimentation. Without thinking about it, she drew nearer as quietly as possible. She wasn't very quiet, but he wasn't listening. His breathing was harsh and she could hear the sound of his hand in front of him, a soft, slapping sound.

She was close enough now to… She touched his back softly. He froze, shivering. Shaeeah took another step, placed both hands on his back, softly stroking the tight muscles. She felt his tempo change, his breathing change.

"You're the first man, I've seen." She whispered.

That affected him. A whimper, a sob came from his lips. He moved closer to the tree for support, moving slowly so her hands stayed on his back. She moved with him, then closer, until she was against his back. Odd, she could hear his heartbeat from the back.

She licked her lips nervously. "May I ..." she began and couldn't finish.

"Any… anyth... thing," he stuttered. His arm had stopped pumping back and forth, now it moved slowly, more gently. She slid her hand up his back onto his shoulder, hugging him a bit, then slowly down his arm. His forearm muscles tensed and relaxed. He turned slightly, just enough so she could reach in front of him. Her hand caressed his forearm, his hands. Her fingers slid between his fingers, onto his soft skin. He gasped and his fingers tightened momentarily around hers then relaxed. She marveled at the velvety softness of his skin as her fingers touched him, at the tension of little brother, at the way it felt alive.

He looked down. A delicate hand caressed him lightly. It tickled. Her fingers slowly spread, explored the opening, damp from his two dimensional fantasy already gone. She was real. He was so hard now, at her touch, harder then he'd ever been in his life. She explored that hardness. Running her fingers down him, feeling the way it pulse with his heartbeat.

Her touch was so soft, so tentative. He groaned. Her fingers unclasped him immediately. "I haven't hurt you, have I?" Her voice was uncertain.

"No. Your hand feels so good but it’s …" he swallowed, licked his lips. "it's light. Better would be to grab harder, slide up and down harder, squeezing over the top." He paused. "Best… best would be you go away before anyone…" He couldn't speak another word.

She had gripped him harder, her nimble fingers sliding, picking up that moisture to spread over the rest of him. Her other arm came around his waist and slipped under his shirt, for stability. Her palm was hot against his skin. He wasn't sure he was still breathing.

Her hand was wonderful. It was only a few strokes when he jerked. "Yes, yes," he whispered harshly. She kept rubbing softly, exploring, sliding her fingers over him. He put his hands over hers. For his comfort if she moved her fingers away from him, for her guidance as she did not.

She didn't remove her hand, feeling its throbbing, the sticky wetness, and the way little brother soften and shrank back to normal. Quad's breathing was becoming normal though his knees were still weak.

"You are the first woman to touch me," he whispered. "I will never forget you."

She leaned against him. Odd, he could feel her heartbeat through his back. She kissed him on the back and softly moved away. Quad stayed leaning against the tree until he was sure she was gone. He didn't need to see her, he knew who she was.

Slowly he tucked himself back into his pants. He leaned against the trunk of the tree and buried his head in his arms. Quad cried over years lost to unnatural aging, lost to war, lost to prison.

**Ahsoka, Echo, Rex, Aureki, Barin**

Rex came up from the water, kicking himself off the bottom of the thermal pool toward the wavering image above him. He had a tendency to sink but he liked pushing himself, challenging himself against what was. Perhaps it made him a good captain. Mentally he shrugged; perhaps it made him a scared trooper trying to prove himself.

He came up, splattering water droplets everywhere to Barin's delight and Aureki's laughter. Echo and Ahsoka were watching him also.

"What?" he exclaimed at all four sets of eyes on him. They laughed.

"Just admiring the view," quipped Ahsoka.

"Same, brother," added Echo, his arm around Ahsoka and a grin on his face. "You look almost as good as me."

"Quite handsome," agreed Aureki.

Barin scrunched up his nose. "Ick!"

Rex laughed.

Aureki grabbed Barin by the waist. "And one day, you'll be much handsomer and the girls will all come kiss you." She pushed him up, not quit strong enough to give him a really good lift, and into the water. Barin curved his body and turned it into a dive, swimming toward Rex. It was hard for him. Like his father, he had a tendency to sink. But, also like his father, he loved the movement in the element. Aureki slid into the tepid water. She and Ahsoka were forbidden the hotter parts of the thermal pool by both Kix and Saria due to their pregnancies.

Barin grabbed onto Rex's hand. "Throw me, papa Rex. Throw me into the air!" he shouted excitedly and Rex picked him up and threw him with a laugh; careful to aim toward a cooler, deeper part of the pool. Barin balled up a bit to make a bigger splash and Rex laughed again as the water hit the sun-dried Ahsoka and Echo.

"You planned that," shouted Echo with a grin and Rex knew trouble when he saw it. He tried to move away, but Echo had quickly jumped in, splashing Rex, and grappling with him even before coming up for air.

"Help," said Rex, with a grin to Aureki and Ahsoka, just before he was pulled under. Their reaction hadn't been helpful. They had laughed. Aureki had splashed him and he had glared at her as his feet gave way to Echo's pull. Even Barin swam over, willing to help papa Echo topple papa Rex.

Rex and Echo grappled, underwater and above water, occasionally letting Barin grab one of them and then coming up to throw the boy into the air. They couldn't stay underwater long, the laughter was too contagious.

After a while, Rex climbed onto the warm boulder, Ahsoka and Aureki to either side of him, content with his own life. He watched Echo play with Barin, chasing him underwater and grabbing him to haul the laughing child into the air. He sighed. Aureki turned to him as did Ahsoka. Ahsoka raised an eyebrow.

"Are you alright, Rex?" asked Aureki. She blushed, she rarely called him Rex.

"I'm fine, Aureki. I'm lucky to have you and Ahsoka and Echo and Barin and children to come."

"You sounded almost sad."

"You're right. I was thinking of the men, of the stories they tell me about why they ran, why they committed treason, how they hurt." He paused. "Most of them are not going to be as lucky a man as I am."

She tilted her head, considering. "This, I think, is something you wish to discuss with Ahsoka?"

Rex furrowed his brows and pulled his lip with his teeth. He gave a slow nod. "I think so, Aureki."

She smiled and kissed him softly. "Then discuss and I shall go assist the terrible water monster with Barin. I believe he's getting tired."

"Barin?" laughed Ahsoka, "I don't think...”

"The water monster," chuckled Aureki as she slipped into the water.

"Tell me, Rex." Ahsoka offered.

He took a moment to get started. "I've been debriefing, listening to stories of despair." Rex shook his head. "The Imperials are destroying the men; making them less individual and more of a monolithic entity of terror." He whispered again, "They are destroying the men, but not the army. Names are discouraged, even off-duty, it's prohibited to individualize armor. So far, a common thread seems to run through the story of every man that deserted. Even my own, even Cody's."

"What is that?" she asked, her hand on his shoulder providing a comforting presence.

"The men who have run had had someone see them as individual. Col's Ehveen and her family, Boil and Waxer's Numa, even Jesse's torture victim who had looked into his eyes and told him his tattoo no longer fit. She saw him as an individual."

"I didn't know about Jesse." began Ahsoka.

"And you still don't." warned Rex looking at her. "I'm told you because you won't treat him any differently than you are now. But you're the only one. Not even Cody." Rex closed his eyes in pain. "He's told me and because of that I'll probably have to debrief him. I do not want to do that."

"A problem for a different day," she said and he nodded, quietly contemplating.

Rex took a different track. "Have you noticed how many men there are from the 501st? Both here and on Boil's lists."

"I did notice there were quite a few. Also from Cody's company and the 41st."

"We're here, Ahsoka," he said, "because we had you. You remembered everyone's name from the first time, you could tell a man in or out of armor, and they appreciated that. You wept for dead brothers, amused them with stories, visited them in the med unit. General Kenobi and Commander Offee both did, at least some of the same."

"You did as well." She pointed out.

"That was my job." He said gently. "It was expected of me. Not you. I didn't realize it until I was debriefing Chopper and he said that if you hadn't been with the 501st, he'd be just another mindless clone. I looked at the stories of the men I'd already debriefed and men whose stories I knew. Always there's someone who sees them as individuals. Not necessarily who loves them like Col or your love for the men of the 501st. Sometimes, just a look or a word. I asked Cody and he thought about it for a minute then agreed.

He was quiet, on the boulder, Ahsoka touching his shoulder, rubbing his back.

"What does it mean, Ahsoka?"

"I don't know, Rex. Perhaps something like that is fundamental in recognizing that we are not alone but we are unique. Your brothers are not alone and that is driven into them. They are told they are identical, interchangeable. They are clones, the same. For the most part, many of them haven't found their individual uniqueness yet. Perhaps just a look is sufficient for all the pieces to fall into place."

"And when they fall into place?" asked Rex.

"When you recognize your own individuality, can you deny the individuality of others?

"Jedi philosophy," Rex muttered, but he smiled at her. She bent and kissed him.

Uncle Fives, all the gods from Shili and throw in the angels of Millius Prime bless him, had come and taken Barin. He'd thrown the laughing six-year-old boy over his shoulder, promised to feed him, and waved at the adults.

Rex and Echo had been prepared to go without dinner but Aureki had smiled and pulled out a basket of finger food. "This is what you get when the cook loves you." They'd sat on the warm boulder, feeding each other, licking their lips at the food, licking the fingers of their wives, sucking and kissing with abandon.

Then, they'd abandoned the food and fell to kissing their wives more seriously, harder. Licking and sucking far more pleasurable items than finger food.

As though they planned it, Rex pulled Ahsoka into one area of the pool and Echo had led Aureki to another area. Rex could hear Echo and Aureki's words, a murmur that went with the waves their bodies created against the stones. He could hear Aureki's whimpering moans, Echo's heavy breathing; theu were the background for his own words, for Ahsoka's words.

"I love you, Ahsoka. Every day, more and more." He whispered, kissing her, sweeping his tongue behind her ear into the sensitive crevice of her lekku and softly nuzzling the base of her montrals. "I am driven into bewilderment. How can I possibly love you more than I do right now? But I know tomorrow, I will." He covered her mouth with kisses. He didn't want an answer to the mystery; he simply wanted her to know.

She moaned and pressed her body against him, her hands stroking his face, his neck. His hands, around her, cupped her and lifted her against him. He liked feeling her weight against him, it held him down. It reminded him that this wasn't one of his fantasies back on the _Resolute_ where it had only been the weight of his hand. Or quietly by a campfire with Echo, Fives and Jester, his lips held silent, only his breathing through his clenched teeth a sign that he didn't sleep.

It reminded him that he had been too stubborn to search for her, too stubborn to believe that he loved her. Too stubborn to think that she would love him; had loved him more than she had loved anything else in her life. Even Echo, even Aureki, even Barin. He was the other half of her soul. Her love for them was as boundless as the galaxy, stretching beyond wild space; her love for him was the pinpoint of the center.

His moan faded into her lips; he was hard against her body, ready for her. Her arms clasped around his neck and she moved her hips against him, smiled wickedly then circled her legs around his waist.

He gasped in surprise and groaned as his hardness slid into her. Her flesh rippled against him. "You," he gasped with a smile, sliding deeper with a move of his hips. "Are wonderful."

"You have a couple of good points, yourself," She muttered, trying to make a joke. It didn't get far as he could see her eyes were half-shut, half-open and filled with lust. She gave up on jokes, they'd never been her strong suit, and gave a sighing cry. "You feel so good in me. So much like home for me. Like haruu, like hearthfire."

He leaned against a boulder, careful of her legs behind him, taking the pressure on his shoulders. His hands, supporting her lightly in the water, moved her up and down. The view of her breasts, slipping in then out of the water, was wonderful. As they bobbed up, he clasped the nipple of each between his lips, letting her rebound pull them from his lips.

"You are my heart," he breathed harshly at her. "My center, everything I am."

She arched her back. His own back arched in response and he growled deep in his throat, wanting, needing her. He kept his eyes open watching her, watching her beauty. He watched her face, her mouth opened, her eyes closing as her head went back. Her own moans began in her throat and hummed through her montrals and her cheeks flushed a ruddy sunset with her delight. She gasped, her body tight then she relaxed in waves as Rex's own body tightened and relaxed.

He relaxed then, dipping his head to her. "Why," he asked, husky-voiced, with a kiss on her lips, "are you always ready for me?"

She smiled.  "Because I only have to see you, only have to think of you, or touch you or smell your scent and my body prepares for you." She whispered. "Know that." She gave him a kiss, warm and moist, love rather than passion. "Know that every time I see you, I am ready for you. Whether you are playing with Barin or speaking with other men or even stealing the blankets from my side of the bed,"

"I don't," he denied, his brown eyes innocent.

"You do," she replied, "but even then, if you were to turn around and invite me in your arms, I would be ready for you, Rex."

He smiled, "Now that," he kissed the tip of her nose affectionately. "Is an incentive to keep stealing the blankets."

"You're far warmer than any blanket, anyway." She murmured, as she ran her face along his neck, to stop and gently nibble his earlobe. He gave a gentle noise in the back of his throat that rolled along her lekku, echoed in her montrals. She whimpered, her eyes drowning in his. "Again," she asked softly. "Please do that to me again."

"Everything or just the noise?" he grinned.

Her eyes closed and she smiled.

"Everything, it is," he promised. She could feel him, hard, preparing to fulfill his promise.


	7. Healing - Scenes from the second week on Saleucami

**Med Barn – Early Afternoon**

Numa sat quietly and Saria remembered how still Boil had been when he'd come to see her. Numa was tall and lean; she'd be a beautiful woman. Already she possessed that indefinable quality of grace.

"I'm glad you no longer insult Jester." Numa's voice was quiet.

"I'm glad you had Boil tell me. I didn't realize I was insulting Jester." Saria smiled. "Since then, I've made sure to call every man by their name."

"You seem very good at recognizing them, even the ones without marks. They are surprised at that. You must observe keenly." Numa tilted her head as she observed Saria.

"Before I became a nurse, I was a kinesiologist and studied humanoid movement." She smiled at the younger girl. "They all move and walk differently. Sometimes, it's all I can do to refrain from asking a man to take off his shirt so I can understand why he moved his arm a certain way. Is it a wound? Morning stiffness from cold ground? Old scar tissue? Too much chase and tackle the day before?"

"Ask them, they would be pleased. Not just that a woman would like to see them without a shirt, but because they usually enjoy talking about the wounds, how brave they are. They would be in swoons to have you poke and prod them." Numa considered. "Not Chopper though, he has too many scars. Nor Shy or Jesse."

Numa glanced down, considered and then smiled at Saria. "You would have trouble making them keep on their pants as they gathered to show you whose scar was bigger."

Saria laughed and Numa smiled behind her hand, all the lines of her face curved up in enjoyment. They had taken each other's measure and were surprised to find they liked each other.

"Boil told me you wished to see me because you were kidnapped by slavers?" Saria asked.

Numa shook her head. "I was sold to them by my uncle, my legal guardian. It is one reason, a large reason, why we are no longer on Ryloth."

"Will you tell me about it?" asked Saria.

Numa nodded. "It is not precisely legal or precisely illegal to sell one's younglings. Twi'lek dancers, usually girls, are a sought after commodity on many planets and even on Ryloth itself. The war has made people desperate and poor. It was not unexpected that my uncle should sell me instead of his daughter." Numa's face hardened in anger. "But it was not right to sell me without given Waxer first right of purchase, it was not right to sell me without a week's preparation, it was not right to sell me to slavers who would take me to unknown places so I would never see my _nerra_ again." Numa paused for a moment. "But I was lucky."

"You were rescued."

Numa shook her head and her face paled slightly. "No," she said, her voice a shadow of its normal vibrancy.

"What do you mean then"?" Saria's voice was soft.

"They raped… another girl. She'd been sold at the same time as me. Later, when the sellers and relatives were gone, one of them, a Weequay, chose her. He raped her in front of us. To scare us, I think." Numa was silent for a moment. "He did scare me. He spent a long time trying to choose between me and her. Touching us, measuring us in some way. He chose her and he raped her and took her away. When they rescued us, she was still screaming." Numa wiped her tears with her palm. "She was still screaming when we went into hyperspace. Saoha went into the med unit and held her. That finally made her quiet."

Saria was crying also. Her hands were on her lips.

"I cannot talk to anyone who would speak of this to Nerra Waxer. When he rescued us, he was afraid that I had been raped by the pirates. He was very scared, asking me questions. He asked what they had done to me. He did not think to ask what I had seen them do to another girl."

"What would he do?" Saria asked, "to know this."

"He would blame himself and he would hurt. He would be angry and he would lash out; possibly at Rex and Echo and Fives because they were part of the rescue. In time he would realize that there was nothing he could have done; that he had done everything he could. But his relations with Boil would suffer. His relations with me would suffer and that would torment him even more. Perhaps he would no longer be friends with Rex." Numa bit her lip. "I think that Echo would forgive his anger and Fives certainly would. So I will not let him know. You will not tell him." Numa looked hard at Saria.

"You have confidentiality, Numa." Saria reassured her. "No one will hear of this."

Numa nodded her head. "Good."

"Boil said that Waxer is worried you wish to marry them."

"Waxer has always been perceptive." Numa smiled.

Saria frowned. "Then you do wish to marry your fathers?"

"They are not fathers," Numa corrected. "They are _nerra_. That is an important distinction for Ryloth law. There are no prohibitions to marry one's _nerra_ on Ryloth. Even if they were my fathers, there is no biological reason I cannot marry them, no reason I cannot have children for them."

"That would be considered..." Saria began

"I am Twi'lek,” Numa’s voice was hard. “I was sold to pirates as a slave; to dance for onlookers. Do you think the pirates would have made sure I was not sold to someone who preferred the flesh of a youngling?" Numa's voice was angry. "Waxer and Boil, and their brothers, have been the only ones who have not sought to use me since the death of my parents. For me, they would give their lives. For them, I would do the same." Her voice softened. "They love me and it is the love of men for a child. But I love them and that is moving from the love of a child to the love of a woman. They have taken care of me for eight years and plan to take care of me until they die. Certainly, I can love them and take care of them as well. It will be easier to do so as their wife. When I am 16 I will become an adult by Ryloth law and I will ask them to marry me. I will give them reasons for their logical minds and I will give them hugs and kisses for their emotions."

Saria nodded. "You've had this planned for a long time."

Numa nodded.

"Then why come to me? Certainly not for my approval. I've very rarely met an adult as self-sufficient and whole as you."

"Because, since I saw the pirate rape that girl, I have become scared of my _nerra_. Scare of what their," she stumbled over the word, "penises may do to me." She moved her hands in a pleading gesture to Saria. "I have seen my _nerra_ and their brothers naked. I have seen them with each other and with other people having sexual pleasure. That did not scare me. But, since I saw the pirate rape that girl, that is all I can see. Him using himself like a dagger, to cut into the girl; to make her bleed not only her body, but in her soul as well. He cut out the pleasure from her for all time. Nerra Waxer killed that Weequay, one shot to the head and he was dead. But in my mind, he lives and he laughs at me, because I can no longer anticipate my _nerra_ with loving joy. That is what I fear, Saria. That I will come to my wedding bed in fear while a dead slaver pirate laughs at me."

Numa's body shook; she shivered as tears started falling. Saria moved to her side. It wasn't what profession demanded. She put her arms around the girl softly. This was demanded by friendship. Numa curved into that warmth, her sobs muffled by her face in Saria's shoulder. Saria just held her, knowing she wept for so many things that she hadn't been able to weep before. This was demanded by the bonds of family.

**Before Dinner**

Saoha smiled at the scarred man. His name was Chopper and he would occasionally smile at her in passing; though more often he dropped his head to hide the scarred side of his face. She knew that was an old habit, deeply ingrained. Sometimes his emotions were so clear she could almost hear the words echoing through time: 'Drop your ugly face, trooper'. She often wondered whose voice that was, so angry and hateful. When Chopper had that thought, he remembered he was trying to develop new inclinations and would look into her face with a smile. It would only take a moment for his smile to go from remembered duty to real; from a re-ordering of his new habit to genuine pleasure.

He liked her beauty, she liked his mind. They hadn't had much conversation being busy settling in. She'd like to rectify that now, wanting to get to know everyone here. Curiously, he had asked Sula for all three women to clear his psyc. For an explanation he had said, "I know I've been mental. I want to be sure I'm sane."

Chopper was sitting under one of the trees now instead of in it. His shirt, for once, was off, exposing the scars on his chest and back. Chopper grimaced, holding his fist tight so he wouldn't grab the shirt and quickly pull it on. Saria had seen them in the pool, Ahsoka long ago in the _Resolute_ med unit. He was sure he had no secrets from the Zeltron women. Neither Suu nor Aureki gave him any attention different from his brothers and he knew their hearts were taken and they would never see him, much less his scars. It was Numa, Shaeeah and Jek he had worried about; they often played tag, so he had kept his shirt on so they wouldn't see his scars.

Shaeeah had asked why he kept his shirt on. He explained. She nodded. "Well, I'm sure Jek has seen them in the pool and forest spirit Numa has seen them so it's only me and I'd much rather you be comfortable."

He said no and she had kicked her foot into the dirt. "Fine, then I will sneak after you. I will go down to the thermal pool and wait for you. Or I will sneak onto your camp before you all wake and I will see you. Or I will follow you when you go to wash your clothes. Then I will tell you I have seen you and you can remove your shirt and be comfortable." So he had sighed and removed his shirt, waiting for her grimace. She had made a face, but it hadn't been disgust, merely sympathy. Then she had given him a quick hug and run off to the game.

Saoha saw him sitting under one of the trees. His shirt, for once, was off, exposing the scars on his body, on his chest. This was the first time she had seen that. Always, he kept his clothes on, even in the heat of day playing the fast-paced game. Even now she sensed a feeling of self-consciousness from him; an embarrassment that had been inculcated in him for a long time, an embarrassment that had been mocked in prison. An embarrassment that was only now fading and much of that, she could feel, was from Saria's acceptance of him in the thermal pool the other day.

Saoha chuckled. Saria had blushed when Sula had asked how the evening had gone with Chopper. Her reply of 'Very nice' came nowhere near explaining the deepness of that blush, nowhere near explaining why her body relaxed and her heart beat faster. She had seen the knowing looks of the Zeltron women gave each other and laughed with them as they started laughed. 'Steamy,' she had revised with a soft giggle.

Chopper had been tagged out of the game of chase by an excellent tackle from Pax. It had been an aggressive tackle, not permitted with the younglings, and Saoha could feel the pain that would be a purple-red bruise on his leg in the morning. He was one of the men who liked his games rough; most of them liked the games rough. They said it kept them alive. It was odd; they were so gentle with the children. Saoha moved to sit next to him, baby peach in her arms.

Chopper's eyebrows rose as one of Fives wives sat next to him, almost near enough for him to wrap his arm around her waist. Although she carried the baby, he knew she wasn't Sula. Saoha, he remembered, though Fives often called her Sa'. He wondered briefly if that wasn't an insult to her name, though he'd never known Fives to insult anyone.

She was beautiful, the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. Chopper laughed at himself. Before coming to Saleucami, he could count the women he'd seen on both hands, the women he'd talk to on one hand. Old shame mixed with new pleasure and he smiled at her, more hopeful that she'd smile back than anything else. She glanced at him and moved slightly closer as though they were friends, as though they were talking to each other.

He was tall enough to look over her shoulder and at the baby cradled in her arms. He enjoyed looking at the promise of the child.

"Here," said Saoha, turning to him, "You'd like to hold her."

"Yeah, but I'd break her." Chopper didn't move, frozen in fear, as Saoha quickly and expertly slid the infant into his half-curled arm. The baby seemed to weigh less than his blaster had weighed.

"Here, curve this arm to support her, her butt in your hand and her back along your arm." She folded his arm to her direction. "This arm cradles her." Saoha reached across him and set his other hand around the baby. She touched his bare chest with a finger, "Hold her near your heart." Chopper was proud of himself for not flinching as her finger brushed against an old scar.

He glanced down to the baby. She was a warm, moving bundle in his arms. Chopper could feel her heartbeat flutter against his chest. Her hair was dark, like Fives hair, like Chopper's own. He wondered what color her eyes would be as her face scrunched up in what seemed to be a grin. "She's a beautiful child."

Saoha seemed to ignore him for a moment, her attention on the baby. Then she smiled into Chopper's face. "She is beautiful and she likes you. I'll have to let you hold her more often."

Chopper decided he would like that. A lot. He glanced up into Saoha's face. She smiled at him and he decided he would like that a lot also.

"Why does Fives call you Sa'?" It was the first question that came to his mind; the first string of a conversation to keep her by his side for a few minutes. He'd like to get to know her, learn to flirt, and learn to talk to women without shame coloring his face. He'd have to learn; to deal with people without self-consciousness.

"For you to call someone by a name not his own is an insult, correct?" she asked.

He nodded.

"Why?" she asked.

"It's not what we have chosen to be called."

"Perhaps that is the difference. I never chose my name; it was given me after I was weaned." She leaned to nuzzle the child, shaking her head a little. "As we will name peach when she is older." Chopper shut his eyes at the feel of her hair against his chest.

She continued speaking. "One day, when Fives was pleasuring us in bed and he took his mouth away from me for an instant too long in order to say my name, I told him he could call me Sa', a childhood nickname. For him, Sa' is what I have chosen to be called."

Chopper swallowed and glanced down at the baby. "I'm sorry, I didn't hear anything after," he swallowed again, embarrassed. "…'pleasuring us in bed'."

"I could tell." She smiled at him. "Your face went all stiff."

"Wasn't the only thing," he muttered as he blushed. He watched the game, the diversion of an instant. Most of the men were on the sidelines now, yelling for the men on their team. Only Edge, Boil, Rex and Echo were still playing, the sweat running from their bodies, making their backs glisten in the setting sun.

Chopper's back didn't glisten; the sweat ran in the crevices of his scars, running in the channels of his corrugated skin. But today, he had taken off his shirt at Shaeeah's urging. He was tired of washing it every day. He was tired of sweating more because of its warmth. He was tired of being the only man wearing one. He relaxed. No one had said anything. Most of the men barely noticed, though Rex had given him an approving nod. Saria had seen him from the med barn door. She had blushed, smiled at him before returning to the barn. Now Saoha had sat next to him. It was an amazingly mild reaction to his fear of years.

Boil got a good tackle at Rex who'd been dodging Edge; Echo just a fraction too far away to block him. Rex hit the ground with a hard grunt, Boil on top of him, both men laughing as Boil helped Rex up and pointed him off the field. Chopper nodded with a smile. Boil and Edge were Chopper's teammates today and the unofficial bet was the winning team to be first in line for dinner. Being late for dinner usually meant you'd miss out on the wonderful bread Suu baked.

"Boil makes a good partner to almost anyone. He reads people very well." Chopper commented. Another string in the conversation.

"He does." Saoha was willing to let him lead the conversation and Chopper was glad. "Perhaps it is his scout training," she continued.

As they watched, Boil and Edge cornered Echo. Echo would give them a good struggle, but the end was a foregone conclusion. Edge was always one of the last two men, usually the last.

"You read people well, also." She commented. "Why is that?"

“Self-preservation.” He frowned in memory and the baby gave a mewl of distress. He gestured to hand her back to Saoha.

"No, merely think good emotions. I am sorry I brought back bad memories."

He held the baby, squirming uncomfortably. "How do I think good emotions?" he asked her.

"Here, we can make new ones," she said, as she leaned closer to him, circling one arm around the baby, one around his back. Immediately, the child ceased her squirms.

"Much better thoughts," murmured Chopper. Then he grinned at Saoha. "Should we be exposing a baby to those kinds of emotions?"

She laughed, her arm squeezing around him. "Please, call me Sa'."

Chopper grinned and held the baby, making cooing noises he’d heard Sula say to the child. When he glanced towards Sa’, she was smiling at him. Chopper lost most of his own smile as he saw Fives making his way up the incline.

Fives noticed his fading smile. “No, Chopper, I’m just here to collect the peach. Kix wants to check on her.” He bent and took the child, his handling of the squirming baby far more confident than Chopper’s. “I’ll bring her back,” he grinned.

“No, Fives,” said Saoha as she leaned into Chopper’s side. “She will want Sula soon.” She turned toward Chopper. “And I would not like our discussion interrupted so soon.”

**Before Dinner - A Mutual Attraction**

Kix held the infant in both hands. She'd been his first child and he was as proud of her as her own parents. Her face scrunched up in some kind of emotion and Kix laughed softly at her expressions. He hadn't realized simply watching a baby could be so entertaining. He slipped her back into her carry, holding her.

"She's beautiful and healthy, Fives. I don't know much about Zeltron genetics, but it looks like she might have your brown eyes." He handed the baby to Fives.

Fives laughed, taking his peach into his arms, holding her closely to his heart. "I'll accept your expert opinion about both her beauty and her health." He glanced at his peach. "Let me give her to Sula, Kix, I'll be right back." Fives went out the door with the baby.

Kix watched him go, 'what if's' running though his mind, then sighed. Fives was, very obviously, a happily married man content with his life as it was. His wives, Sula and Saoha, were wonderful women. Kix saw Sula daily, had spent an hour with both women at the pool. They had flirted kindly with the men. Even Riposte, suspicious with anyone not a brother prisoner, had relaxed, smiled and joked back. Sula bringing Kayl back from death had been spectacular. Kix sighed again. No way would a man like Fives would be interested in him.

He'd proposed to Saria. _Osik_ , he'd been so nervous he'd had to write it on a data pad. He liked her; he could learn to love her. Already, she was expecting a child. Kix would love a family. She hadn't said no to him as she had to the pilots. She wanted time and he had nodded. He wanted to work with her, learn more medicine from her. Already he knew more simply because she talked through treatment, talked during the surgeries. He could make love to her; he would have to learn but he'd learn. For a family, he'd learn anything. For the chance to be happy, to hold his own child in his arms… like Fives and his family, Sula and Saoha and the beautiful baby peach.

He turned to see Fives in the doorway with a smile. "With deep sighs like that, what's on your mind, Kix?" Fives shut the door behind him and came to stand next to Kix.

"I was just thinking about your wives, Fives. They're also very beautiful."

"And healthy like my peach." Fives grinned and took a step closer to Kix. "And wonderfully perceptive." Fives put his arm around Kix and Kix froze, his heart pounding. "And they share, Kix. When I found them I thought I had died and gone to some unimaginable heaven. Do you share, Kix? Would you like to touch one of my wives? Beautiful Saoha, perhaps,"

Fives had his hands on the front of Kix's pants and Kix gasped. He hadn't expected that.

"Not my lovely Saoha, then perhaps you’d like to make love to my gentle and just as beautiful Sula?"

Fives hand merely held him, offering no pleasures and Kix was confused. Fives appeared to be measuring his attraction to his wives.

"No," commented Fives, with a rueful shake of his head, "not my wonderful Sula". Kix gulped as Fives' hair brushed against him. He closed his eyes and wondered what it would feel like on his bare skin. Fives was so close to him, Kix could feel his breath on his cheek. He opened his eyes to see Fives looking into his eyes with a grin. "Perhaps, me? Would you like to make love to me, Kix?"

Kix nodded a little and felt himself thicken into Fives' hand.

"I am so lucky, Kix, that my wives talk to me, that my wives think of me, that my wives share me, that my wives love me." Fives' arm pulled Kix closer and his hand gently began to caress Kix. "Would you have ever asked, Kix? Would you have ever expressed that you found me attractive?" The warm breath of his lips caressed Kix.

"No." Kix whispered into the kiss. Hesitantly, one of his arms came around Fives, his hand luxuriating in that dark, wavy hair. Fives delicately slipped his tongue between Kix's lips, his hand stroking Kix's hardness inside his pants. Kix put his shaking hand outside of Fives' pants, felt the hardness and pulled away from the kiss, his breath shaking. Fives took no offense, instead stroking the side of Kix's face with gentle fingers. Kix shut his eyes in wishful dreams.

"Are you a virgin, Kix?" Fives asked softly.

"No." Kix's face was hard and tormented for only an instant, but Fives caught it.

"Outside of prison, Kix, outside of rape, are you a virgin?" Fives voice was low, gentle and concerned, his palm on Kix's cheek.

Slowly, Kix jerked his head in a nod, his lips twisted as he remembered his first time. He'd been held down, no faux love or even sexual attraction, simply a game of power which he had lost. Fives removed his hand from Kix's pants, giving the softening little brother a pat.

"Tonight then, Kix. After dinner come up to our room. Sula will be there with us, but not Saoha."

"Us?" Kix was glad there was no quiver in his voice.

"We won't have sex. But I would like to get to know you, and my lovely, wonderful wife," Fives grinned, "might like to watch at some time in the future, if you let her." Fives' face became solemn. "Besides, she's had training in sexual trauma."

"I'm not in any kind...”

"You are, Kix. Do not compare yourself to this wounded group and think you're not hurting. You're just not as bad as about a third of the men here. You were a virgin who was raped in prison. I'm sure it wasn't gentle, either. That, by definition, is sexual trauma."

"No, not gently." Kix's voice was soft, "but the others need help more than I do."

"Possibly and we’re all here to help. But they haven't expressed even so much as a thought in my direction and you have been watching me." Fives gave Kix a light kiss.

Kix tentatively kissed him back.

"I'll be there, Fives." He gave a little smile. "I enjoy Sula's company and I'd like to get to know you better, too. It's been a long time since I've had thoughts like that." He bowed his head in shame and misery. "I thought they'd killed those wants forever."

"It wasn't your fault, Kix. Remember that. Whatever happened was not your fault."

**Before Dinner - Sketch's Pain**

Sketch sighed with relief as he sat on the bench. Cut had pulled a bench from the barn and set it against the wall of the house in the back yard for Sketch to join everyone during meals. Sketch used it often for rest as well. He was gaining endurance with the crutches, gaining dexterity, gaining skill. Shaeeah had given him one of her packs to carry his art supplies with him and, after he'd stopped laughing at the garishly girly design, he'd hugged her. She'd grinned and blushed, her own burbling laughter joining his. But after they'd laughed she'd hugged him and he said the pack was full of love. It wouldn't fit on his broad shoulders, so he slung it over one arm. Each morning, she and Numa would sit beside him and he would show them his new drawings from the previous day.

He slept comfortably by the kitchen, the residual warmth from the kitchen enough to keep the muscle spasms away during the night. He was concerned about muscle spasm during the day, but they were few and not as severe as they'd been in prison. He'd spoken with Saria and she suggested it was because of the exercise; he was moving the blood to his leg, circulation providing internal warmth.

They'd set up his surgery for a day away. Sketch was anxious, but in a good way. She reminded him that it would mostly be aesthetic at this point; turning his foot so it was angled correctly to the lower leg bones, connecting ligament and muscle to their proper attachment on bone. She promised him it would take a lot of therapy and work. This was the foundation but he wouldn't be able to use until his knee was corrected.

This was fine with Sketch. It was a start. It was movement forward, it was a beginning. It was hope.

He had pulled her into him, hugging her tightly, kissing her until he could feel her heart pounding against him.

Since he wasn't yet allowed to go by himself, Sketch invited different brothers with him when he went exploring. Jester had been the best, they'd never lacked for things to discuss. Now Jester said very little and only glanced at Sketch with sadness in his face, thinking of Saria. Jester didn't blame Sketch and they were still friends, but the pain for Jester was too overwhelming. Chopper was always good company usually quietly lost in his own thoughts then breaking the silence with a question or sentence that caused both men to think. He told Sketch he was trying to find out who he was becoming because he certainly wasn't who he had been. Sketch had been delighted by that statement and they had discussed personality and individuality. Djinn, also, was good company. He was eager to explore but he tended to explore minutely, once they were where Sketch wanted to be. Djinn would bring his book and read a poem, then discuss it while his fingers scrubbed in the dirt to inspect the soil contents or he climbed a tree to discover insect habitats.

Saria came to visit him most evenings, once he was in the house for the night but not yet asleep. She'd sit on the floor, next to his cot. He liked that; liked all of it; her kisses, her fingers on his face and threading through his hair, her arms tenderly tight around his neck, her palms against his chest. Once, in accidental movement, his hand had brushed her breast outside her shirt and she had gasped, flushed. Sketch had merely continued stroked her face and hair, not ready for anything more.

Sometimes Chopper came in with her and they would both sit talking with Sketch, but Chopper recognized that this was Sketch's territory. Saria would stop leaning against Chopper and lean against Sketch. The first time she'd done so, Sketch and Chopper had raised their eyebrows at each other. It seemed like Saria might share and with that quick glance each man assured the other that he would share with him.

She told Sketch she'd kissed Crux, delighted with his flirting. He had taken to coming to the barn every evening and giving her a shoulder massage as he asked her questions. She said that he would propose, but wouldn't be hurt when she said no. Quiet Pax had also expressed his interest, had taken her for walks in the silver moonlight of Saleucami but hadn't done more than hold her hand and put his arm around her waist as they talked. She had bit her lip when talking about Pax. He would be hurt when she told him no. Sketch had told her, "Give him a kiss then, Saria. He will hurt with or without one, so give him the best one you can."

Dour Edge had expressed an interest in children. He had been business-like. He would care for and love any children of hers, though he'd prefer his self or his brothers as the father. He would please her the best he could, sexually and otherwise, and would share her if she so desired, again preferably with his brothers. He was a hard worker and would welcome Jester back into her life if she desired. She wasn't sure if he would be hurt or not; his proposal had been business-like but she could tell there were untapped depths to him and he had spoken of love. He was one of the men she watched now when they played chase and tackle. His expression then was so much different than when he was in the med barn. Sketch told her that as long as she didn't kiss Edge or promise, he wouldn't hurt.

She told him that Kix had stuttered, badly, as he asked Saria to marry him. Then he'd cursed and went back into the examination room, slamming the door. He came out a few minutes later, his cheeks red and handed her a data pad with his message on it. Sketch has sighed, not knowing what to say to that. "Insist on truth with Kix, he has been badly hurt in prison and has come to believe he deserved everything that happened to him, he believes he is responsible for the deaths of the men who died there."

Dare had also used the data pad, though his conversation had been longer. He bemoaned the fact that he couldn't charm her with words, couldn't discuss things because a million thoughts went through his mind even as he was writing the first word. He couldn't even kiss her properly. She had sighed and given him a kiss; light and soft on his cheek. He had run his fingers through her hair and lightly held her face while he set his lips against her cheek.

Djinn, she wasn't sure about, he'd approached her the other day but ran away before he'd finished asking. Sketch had heard the story and told her. She had blushed for Djinn's embarrassment. She told Sketch that she'd gone to the pool with Chopper but she'd blushed and hadn't said any more.

Sketch had smiled. He liked all of his brothers here and knew that Saria probably couldn't pick a bad husband among the bunch so long as she knew why she was picking the man. Edge wanted children, had always wanted children; Crux wanted attention, Chopper wanted acceptance; neither thought they were worth loving as they were. Jesse wanted redemption, Sketch hoped Saria wouldn't pick Jesse; that would be a long, hard path. Djinn wanted experience, Kix would marry her for innocent love and family, Baffle for occasional sex, Checkout and Backup for frequent sex.

"And why do you look so thoughtful?" her voice interrupted his reverie as she set his dinner and glass on the bench. He laughed and drew his fingers along her beautiful face. He'd marry her for her kisses, her delicious, honeyed kisses. Because that was all he could do. Sketch sigh and became solemn.

"I need to tell you something, Saria."

"I know," she said. "You have that look on your face."

Sketch smiled as well. He'd also marry her for her perceptiveness,

"I'm falling in love with you much faster than I thought I would and you need the truth to make your decision." He gave her a gentle kiss on the lips. "I would be happy to marry you. I would be happy to raise your child with you. But I don't think I'd be able to give you a child. I don't think I can function with anyone." He drew back then. "I used to," he whispered softly. "I've had two women in my past. During battle times, I've also had brothers. Most of us have explored sex with our brothers, especially when there is no other release."

Saria nodded. Crux had mentioned that in-between some of his questions. It didn't bother her as she thought it might.

"But prison …" his mouth opened in a grimace but no words escaped.

"They raped you." It wasn't a question. Sketch nodded sharply.

"They liked doing that, especially after they twisted the leg." He whispered. "Because I'd scream. The pain was…" Again he couldn't' say anything. His throat was dry and his shaking hands reached for the glass at his side.

He drank a bit and stared at the glass in his hand, then put it back down on the bench. "The other brothers, mostly, could hold back the screams. They could grit their teeth and think of revenge or hate." Sketch continued. "I'd scream mostly because of the knee and I couldn't think of anything then. They loved hearing me scream." He looked at her, his eyes bleak. "I lost all interest in ever having sex again. I haven't even," He glanced away from her.

"Calibrated your deece?" she asked, her voice was softly teasing, but her eyes were full of tears.

"Yeah," he chuckled at a brother's phrase on her lips. "I haven't even done that. Rex said that one of Fives' wives might visit me one evening. But she's Zeltron. She hasn't visited because she knows. Both of them give me hugs and kisses; but it’s open, it's their way." Sketch shook his head. "But she won't visit me because she knows I can't perform."

Saria kissed him, gently on his lips then laid her head along his arm. "All things heal, Sketch. In time, all things heal."

He'd marry her for her honeyed kisses, her perceptiveness, her kindness, her humor, her gentleness, her compassion. He'd marry her for love, deep and warm.

**Dinner Conversation - Djinn**

Saoha was pleased that Fives had approached Kix. She and Sula had always known of his occasional interest in men, though he didn't often found one who was compatible. They'd known of Kix's interest on the ship.

Still, it meant she would need to find somewhere else to sleep. The bed provided by Cut and Suu was for two. The three of them and the tiny handful that was peach had laughingly crowded in it. Adding Kix would probably break it. So, Fives had explained and Sa' agreed. Kix needed healing and that needed Sula, Kix needed love and while either she or Fives could provide that, only Fives could provide sex later if desired.

Finding another place to sleep wouldn't be difficult at all. If nothing else, Jester would let her use his house. Saoha shook her head. Sleep alone? Not an option. Then she smiled. Djinn.

Poor Djinn had embarrassed himself in front of Saria, ejaculating even as he asked her if she would … he'd never gotten the words out … and the laughter of his brothers had sent him running. Saria, incredulously, didn't even understand what had happened.

Saoha smiled. She'd let Djinn know that as well.

She saw Djinn at dinner, alone near the tree line around the back yard. Saoha leaned close to Fives at dinner and whispered in his ear. "Djinn. I think I will be with Djinn tonight."

Fives nodded, turned his head with a smile and gave her a kiss. Sula, peach at her breast, reach up and ran her elegant fingers in Sa's hair with a soft smile. They all saw Kix hesitantly walking their way. Saoha gave him a brief hug as she passed him on the way to Djinn's solitude.

Djinn, still embarrassed and angry from the laughter of his brothers, sat alone on the outer edge of the back yard, away from the crowded area. He wasn't enjoying the steak, chewing angrily with his head down. Quietly, Saoha sat next to him. He still seemed unaware of her presence and stabbed a piece of meat.

"It won't fight back, you know." She said and he jerked, almost leaping into the air from a seated position.

"Oh." Djinn looked back down at his meat. "I supposed some of my brothers sent you here." She read his shame.

"Would your brothers be so cruel?" she asked putting her hand on his shoulder.

"No," he muttered, "not really. Mostly they were laughing at the circumstance. It could have happened to any of them."

"Would I be that cruel?"

He looked at her, taking in her beauty, the delicate shade of her dusty pinkish-red skin, her darker hair, her soft smile. He understood that beauty could be cruel, but she'd been one of the rescuers on the ship. Then Djinn looked down at his meal with a frown on his face, already hard. "No." he muttered. "I'm just…" he sighed and dropped his fork into his plate. "What do you want with me?"

"You seemed unhappy and I wanted to cheer you up." She moved her hand from his tense shoulder to his forearm.

"Thanks, but I don't think that's going to happen." He was looking down at her hand with a frown, but his inner turmoil included pleasure at her touch.

"Why not?" Saoha moved her hand down his forearm, lightly touching the back of his hand before withdrawing her touch.

Djinn sighed. "She's the only unmarried woman around and I messed up my chance with her."

"Not really." Saoha took a bite of steak. "She was the only one who was unaware of what happened."

Djinn turned his head to look at her. "How could she?" Then he turned his head back to his feet, his elbows on his knees. "Not for long. Someone will tell her."

"Probably. She still won't hold it against you."

Djinn perked up. "Really?"

"Really. She's a wonderful, understanding person." Saoha gestured across the yard where Saria was sitting with Sketch, her eyes were bright and she was smiling. Pleasure overlaid with nurturing filled her and Saoha let that warm pleasure wash over her. "Busy at the moment though and your chances are not the best. One in twenty-five?" She watched his expressions, enjoying the smile she'd brought to his face with her news.

"Still," Djinn considered aloud, "Maybe I can ask again tomorrow. And they're more like one in fifteen." He told her. "For various reasons, some brothers aren't interested; Riposte, Jesse, Cody, a few others."

"Yes, ask again tomorrow. But what will you do about tonight?" Saoha purred, leaning closer. Djinn froze, his fingers shook on his plate and he turned his face to her. She tilted her face and gave him a soft kiss on his cheek. He quivered, shut his eyes and tried to control little brother. Saoha felt his emotions _sparkle_.

"You're married to Fives." He whispered, his eyes still closed.

"We share and tonight I told him I was hoping to share with you."

He lay back on the grass, his eyes closed and his erection pressing at the material of his pants. He was breathing hard. Then he opened his eyes and quickly sat up. "I'm yours." He turned to her. "What can I do for you?" The sparkle turned into joy, into warmth, into something pure and clean like fresh water.

"A kiss," she smiled. "And finished dinner with me."

He kissed her lips and she kissed back. He closed his eyes to taste her better, to feel more of her warmth. He pressed harder but she withdrew. Disappointed, he opened his eyes. She was only a breath away. When his eyes opened, she lightly touched her forehead to his, her nose to his.

"We need more privacy to continue that kind of kiss." She smiled. "Let's continue dinner first."

"I don't think I'm hungry for food anymore." He said as he stared at her face, his own face incredulous.

"Perhaps not, but we have all night and with food comes conversation." She smiled. "And, conversation is the best manner of flirting and friendship."

"I don't know how to flirt that well," he said as he took a bit of the steak. Then his hand shook. "All night?" he whispered. "You'll stay with me all night?"

She felt his amazement. He had sexual experience, but it had been with women who had no use for him beyond sexual gratification or with women who plied their trade by the hour. "That would be my preference. For you to take your pleasure and then kick me out of your bedroll would be rude in the extreme."

'No, no. I wouldn't do that. I'd kick myself out first, if you wanted. I just…" He took another bite to give himself time to think. "No one's ever wanted me all night." He sighed. "I couldn't last that long anyway." But she caught his intense delight at being wanted all night.

Saoha didn't laugh although her eyes sparkled. "I would like to spend all night with you and, even if you don't last that long, I'm sure we'd still enjoy our time together." She leaned against his chest. "Perhaps just by holding each other?"

"I'll try, Saoha." He put his arm around her. She felt his heart pounding, his blush of delight and the small tendrils of friendship love.

**Announcements - Rex**

Rex looked over the group. He chuckled to himself as his eyes caught different scenes playing themselves out in the back yard.

Numa was serving Boil and Waxer. She did that every night, making sure they always had some of the delicious bread, making sure to save them treats if they were a little late. Numa took very good care of her _nerra_ as they took very good care of her. Tonight, gunship pilots Checkout and Backup were with the scouts. They had just sat down with their plates. Suu had sent them to the end of the line for another prank they had played on the cooks. Rex had noticed there was someone different with the scouts every night. Probably men expressing their thanks to Boil then sharing the meal with them. Cody had told Rex that Boil was more aloof and standoffish than ever. Rex had nodded, "How else could he have survived what he did? Can you see me doing that for three years? You?"

Shaeeah was laughing. She was sitting with Chopper as she usually did. Like Numa did for her _nerra_ , Shaeeah did for Chopper. She was usually talking; asking questions, making comments. Rex could only take concentrated Shaeeah in small doses but noticed that Chopper was more than simply patient with her; he actively enjoyed her company. Sometimes they sat with Sketch and Saria; apparently Chopper and Sketch had made some sort of arrangement. In the mornings, Chopper was often with Saria and in the evenings, she was more often found in the company of Sketch.

Jek was with Gekko and Leven along with young Barin and toddler Keeli. Rex enjoyed the dynamics of that little group. Jek admired Gekko and Leven as older brothers, Barin had the same feelings about Jek. Keeli couldn't express his feelings with any accuracy, but he preferred toddling after Barin over anyone else. One of the nuna had escaped being penned and was at the outskirts of that group; running from Keeli, but still dashing into the group to grab at bits of food Keeli had spilt on the ground and the bits Barin was offering it. Rex noticed his active son was almost a statue to entice the nuna closer to his fingers. Pride puffed his chest; it always did when he watched his son. Col was with them. He'd taken to helping with the children, being around them. 'I'm practicing' he'd laugh, if anyone asked. Every man knew what he was practicing for.

Djinn and Saoha were on the edge of the group, Saoha curled in Djinn's arms, against his chest as she fed him bites from her plate. Djinn's face bore an incredulous look. Rex had to chuckle at that. Saoha, so far away, could still feel his emotions and smiled at him. He smiled back. He had thought his feelings for her and Sula nothing more than lust. Neither woman had been Ahsoka; but they had been there for him, bringing comfort, slaking his body's hunger. He loved them both, not only as his brother's wives, but as sisters to him.

Also on the edge of the group was Jester. He sat alone, his meal finished and his plate in his hand as he watched Sketch and Saria.

Kix had joined Fives and Sula. He was holding baby peach, joy written on his face. Sula was next to him, her arm around his waist, and her head against his arm. Fives was on his other side with an arm stretched around them both as much as possible. The plates of food in front of them were cold and untouched.

Rex looked at Ahsoka, at his side, smiling at him. Echo lay on his back, his head in Aureki's lap as she feed him with her fingers. Cut had watched that for a few minutes then left their little group muttering something about finding his wife and privacy.

Rex stood, slowly, waiting as the talking ceased and everyone turned toward him. "I have a few announcements to make." They were listening respectfully. "Col is the first to clear full debriefing. His destination is Dantooine in the Raioballo system and he has spoken to us about his departure." That had their attention. "Our pilot will be taking him there in eight days." There was a small cheer from the men and Rex waited for it to die down before continuing. "If anyone else would like to immigrate to Dantooine or any other planet in Raioballo they need to have all parts of debriefing done by then. If you're last in line, see if you can trade for a different time. We've streamlined the debriefs so they aren't taking as long as we had anticipated."

Leven and Gekko slapped Col on the shoulders with grins. Jek gave a whoop. Col merely looked eagerly satisfied.

Rex knew that look meant 'home' and smiled. He glanced around the group looking for Cut, but Cut must have found Suu and a little privacy.

"Cut and Suu have stated they will start the new planting season around the same time. They will be planting mostly wheat in the fields but would like to know who would prefer to stay for two to three seasons, or even longer. Knowing this will allow them to consider other crops which might bring more profit. It will tell them if new buildings are required or will modifying the barn be sufficient. They may need to consider the purchase of more nuna, more supplies. This is not a permanent decision. If you don't know right now where you want to go, I'd suggest staying for a season or two." He smiled at the group. "I did." There was some laughter and he knew it was the thought of Captain Rex of the 501st harvesting crops.

"Cut will also be taking a part-time job in the town to keep an ear out for information." He heard their murmurs. "There's no evidence that the escape has been detected, no evidence of Imperials or bounty hunters. This is simply precautionary. Suu will be going into town more often. If you have something you need or want, give her a list. Anything purchased will come out of your stake which is just over two thousand credits." There was silence. None of them had ever had credits. Rex sighed. "Talk to Suu or Aureki about managing household expenses. It's something else everyone should know about."  He paused, glancing around for Cut who must have found Suu and privacy, then continued speaking.  "Because Cut will be staying in town for several days at a time, Jester will be in charge of the farming; his main helpers will be Shaeeah and Jek as well as Echo. If they tell you something in relation to the farm duties, do it."

"Kix says that tests have shown, so far, that you have minor vitamin deficiencies. More protein, gentlemen; enjoy the steaks." Again there was a small cheer from the group of men. "Make sure to get sunlight during the day as well as physical exercise. The games have been supplying that very well. Cody and I will also be having hand-to-hand combat practice daily. As with the games, everyone is welcome. The scouts will be opening their camp for anyone who would like to learn more."

Rex watched his brothers for a moment. He knew what he wanted to say. He wanted to tell them all, that he loved them, that he was proud of them, that they'd done well. He wanted to take away all their pains, wanted to remove their scars, let them know they were safe. But he couldn't say those things.

"Welcome home, my brothers," he whispered as he sat next to Ahsoka, leaning his head into her neck.

**A Small Talk - Jester**

Jester watched her, sitting so close to Sketch, her lithe body touching his, their heads bent together; then she looked up smiling at the lamed man. Sketch had taken his hand and cupped it around her cheek. Jester knew what came next, he didn't have to look. But he did with the morbid anticipation of pain that he knew would break his heart. Again. Saria blushed at the kiss, smiled, and Sketch had brought his face closer again. Jester didn't need to punish himself that much so turned his head.

This was a public kiss. He'd heard that she'd kissed Crux, but that had been softly and on the cheek, in friendship. He'd seen Chopper's look of confident pleasure as he watched Saria and knew Chopper had kissed her, more intimately than Crux but that had been privately and Chopper wasn't talking. Jester was grateful for that though he wasn't sure why.

He knew most of his brothers were interested in Saria. Pax, Djinn, Dub, quiet Edge, even Kix who would hide his own longings and pain to give Saria everything he could.

If he looked hard, Jester could see the softening around Saria's belly, the little tummy that was developing. He wouldn't be surprised if she was over the 90 days she had calculated. She'd been very busy for the last four or five months. Jester hung his head. She'd been busy and he'd been anxious that she was spending so much time away from him. She'd said something innocent and he'd taken offense.

"Does it hurt that much?" Rex's voice was soft in his ear.

Jester didn't open his mouth for fear he'd shout or cry. He wasn't sure which. He simply nodded his head.

"So, why are you torturing yourself watching her and Sketch?" Rex sat next to him.

"I love her." Jester said quietly. "Even if it's torture, I still love her. I love watching her, love being with her, the touch of her hand on my arm, the taste of her kiss. If I watch closely enough, I can almost feel it again."

"Do you love talking to her also?" Rex's question was almost off-handed as he took a bite of goldenfruit, the rind flipped inside out.

"Yes, Rex." Jester's voice was sharp. "She's the most intelligent, imaginative, wonderful person in the world to just sit and have a chat with. You know that."

"So why haven't you talked with her?"

Jester was quiet. Rex sighed.

"Still ashamed?" Rex asked and Jester knew this was a debriefing, of sorts. It required honesty on both sides and commitment to finish.

Jester nodded. "I apologized on the step; when Crux took her to the barn that day. I wasn't loud but she heard me. So did Crux. She asked for time so we could salvage our friendship."

"Is friendship what you want?"

"No. But it's what I'll accept if that's all I can get. It's what I'll accept so I can stay in her life. So I can help with my child." He turned his head sideways to look at Rex. "I feel amazingly fortunate for her to be having my child. You can understand that." Jester set his hands on the ground, spreading his fingers wide, as though feeling for life among the grass. "Clones don't have wives, Rex. They don't have children. The only 'family' for a clone is the army." He pulled his hands back, rubbing his thumbs in his palms. "This is family. I have brothers, dearer to me than my own life. I have sisters, nieces, nephews that I would die for. I had a woman I still love beyond anything I've ever known. She's having my child." He looked at Rex again. "Is that a love a I can even survive?"

Rex nodded, "Barin is richness beyond anything I'd ever thought of. I've touched Ahsoka's and Aureki's bellies to feel the movement and I felt like I touched something infinite in that tiny flutter. It's like you just get bigger the more you love so you can contain it." Rex glanced back at Saoha, just being helped to her feet by Djinn. "Sometimes you can't contain all that love. Sometimes it just overflows."

They were quite for a while, contemplating fatherhood. Then Rex spoke up again. "So, why do you still feel ashamed?"

"I need to apologize to Cass Cjain as well."

"Figured that out, then." Rex commented.

"Yes." Jester nodded. "And I don't want to see her either. Both because of what I did, using her like that and because she'll try again."

"After you apologize, what are you going to do?"

Jester looked at Rex and took a deep breath. "You've got something on your mind, don't you?"

"Always, Jester. Always." Rex took another bit of the fruit licking the juice from the corner of his lips then nodded his head toward where Saria sat. "Have you let her love you in your weaknesses as well as your strengths?"

"What do you mean, Rex?" Jester looked at him with a curious frown.

Rex was quiet for a moment, then his voice was soft. "Have you let her know what happened; what you did in the Jedi temple."

Jester's face crumbled. "No." his voice was as soft as Rex's. "She'd hate me."

"Then she wouldn't be worth your love." Rex was looking over the back yard, leaning back on his elbows, the rind close by his hand. "You love her," he continued. "When she's ill or unhappy, do you just walk out the door and tell her you'll be back when she's better?"

"No! I take care of her, let her know that I'm there for her." Jester dropped his head and stared at the ground. "At least, I did. Until I thought someone else was there for her."

"Then give her the opportunity to be there for you." Rex sat up, cross-legged and put his hand on Jester's shoulder. "Ahsoka knew what happened at the Jedi temple, but she hadn't told Aureki. Echo told Aureki what he did. I told her my part later. She didn't hate us. She cried for us, for our pain."

Jester was merely still.

"Do you think Fives has kept this, or anything, secret from Sula and Saoha?" Rex gave a short laugh and Jester had to chuckle also.

"Do you honestly believe that Saria doesn't already know at least a good part of it?" Rex asked Jester.

Jester turned to Rex. "She can't know."

Rex pointed to Chopper, laughing with Shaeeah. "Chopper was with the 501st and even if he didn't follow orders, he knew what those orders were. Kix also knew and he works with Saria. Countdown, Pax. Also 501st. Also at the temple. She's one of the psyc team. She's listening to everything we have been through and everything we have done. She knows what we did. She just doesn't know the details of your part. Perhaps she's waiting for you to trust her."

Jester's face twisted as he tried to hold back the tears, but a few escaped. Rex simply patted his back. The back yard was mostly empty now in the soft dimness that was early night on Saleucami. Light bugs flickered through the trees and lights through the windows of the house added to the peaceful scene.

Rex spoke again. "I've heard that for the next twenty days or so she's flirting with the men to get to know them. Jester told me it's so she can determine if what she loves is something common to all of us or unique in us as individuals."

Jester nodded. "She's even talking with the men who aren't interested in her, like Cody and Shy, simply to get to know everyone better. So?"

Rex's reply was slow in coming and spoken deliberately. "So why don't you talk with her also. Flirt with her. Find out if what she once loved in you is still there. Start over again. Determine if she wants to share. Determine if you can share."

Jester frowned. Rex watched him. Whatever distaste Jester had for the situation faded as he nodded softly. "I have to apologize to Cass first." He stood with his empty plate in his hand. Rex reached out for it. "It will be on the bench by the back door. Jester nodded.

"Best to get started now." Jester turned toward the forest heading to a house he dreaded to visit.

**A Quiet Walk - Jester**

Jester was at the barn.

"Hello, Saria." He was nervous, glancing away from her then his eyes drawing back as if of their own volition. What if she refused to go? What if she refused to listen to him? "I was wondering if you'd like to go for a walk out to the big rock and back?"

"I... I've got a lot of work to do, Jester." Although she seemed hesitant, his name on her lips was like a caress.

"I know. I've heard Sketch's surgery is tomorrow. But you've always enjoyed a walk beforehand. You said it relaxes you." He glanced around the small area of the med barn. Edge was sitting quietly in the corner. "It's not like I'll talk too much.

Saris chuckled. "I remember. It was about four weeks before you said anything at all to me."

"I'll go, if you prefer," said Edge, watching Saria protectively.

"Why wouldn't she want to go with me, Edge? We are friends." He turned to her, fear in his heart. What if they weren't friends? What if that was also gone? "Aren't we?"

Saria smiled. "We _are_ friends, Jester. Although I won't let you be silent. We have a child to discuss." Her color was high, pink cheeks, as if daring him to deny her baby a second time.

Jester nodded. "Yes, we have a child to discuss. I am sorry, Saria, for saying what I said. At the very least, I should have rejoiced that my best friend was having a very wanted child. And to be carrying my child deserves more gratitude than I showed." He turned, biting his lip against saying anything more. She pulled her shawl off the peg and followed him out the door. He was standing by the big tree where they'd had the argument. As she came out the door, he moved close to her, adjusting his stride to her smaller one.

"Do you have other apologies, Jester?" She asked, with a glance at the tree.

"Yes," he nodded. "I thought I'd say them bit by bit, as we talked"

"That could take another four weeks," she quipped with a smile.

"Not this time." He smiled back.

They walked past the front yard where some men were sparring, Jek among them. Jek waved then the others did as well. All except Chopper, who merely observed, his face emotionless.

They were half-way to the big rock before Saria realized it wasn't a tense quiet between them, but the normal, relaxed silence of walking with Jester.

"It's good to be walking with you again," her voice was soft. Jester smiled to hear that softness though he wasn't sure it would remain there. He nodded; a typical response from him. Jester chewed his lip for a moment, wondering if he should speak.

"I'm sorry I've been ignoring your desire for a walk, Saria. I remember we use to walk every day."

She bit her tongue. She would not say it, would _not_ say it.

She didn't. He did.

"Until I started going on all those runs." He was quiet for a while after saying that. "I was angry and frustrated by what I thought was happening. I'm sorry I didn't ask for clarity."

"I'm sorry, that I didn't notice how distressed you were."

Jester shook his head. "You were busy except when you were exhausted, Saria. There were several times you didn't notice your shoes didn't match or that you shirt or pants were inside out."

"Oh no," she murmured, embarrassed. "My pants?"

His eyes twinkled and his lips almost smiled. "That's ok, Saria. That happened only once."

She stopped and turned toward him. "Because you started putting my clothes out for me, didn't you?"

They were at the big rock and climbed it, Jester giving her his hand. When they were seated on the large, flat-topped boulder, he nodded. "I was working on the house. It was easy for me to have clean clothes out for you each day – proper side out. I just draped them over the chair you threw them on each night."

"Thank you." She chuckled. "Who knows what I would have worn without you watching over me." She went quiet then, remembering that was what Jester did, watched over her. From the first time she'd seen him in armor with the big blaster to such little things as making sure she didn't embarrass herself wearing her clothes inside out. She sighed, a little noise almost lost in the breeze. "I'm sorry, Jester, for saying you'd have to share me with Chymdura. I did say it. Or something close enough to be the same. I only meant you'd have to be sharing my time." She glanced down at her feet, her hands clasped behind her back as she walked. "Perhaps you'd better tell your brothers it's a common saying."

"I will, Saria." He also glanced down at the pathway they walked. "But I don't think most of my brothers would be oversensitive enough to mistake the meaning." He touched his cheek on the scar. "You've heard about what happened at the temple, haven't you?"

"Yes." Her voice was subdued and she bowed her head.

"But I never told you what I did."

"You never had to, Jester. I understand you did something terrible and you have suffered for it. I'd see you sometime, staring out the window, your face all twisted in pain. A couple of times, I asked you what was wrong and you'd start in surprise but you never told me. You'd just say you were thinking." She shook her head. "So I let it be, Jester because if you wanted to tell me, you would."

He nodded. "I want to tell you." It was some while before he began speaking.

"I was up in the tower," he began. "The upper level was where the council room was. Rex and General Skywalker took the main council room. It was supposed to be full of some of the most powerful Jedi who were meeting to plan treason against the Republic. It wasn't, but I didn't know that until later. So the two ARCs, Fives and Echo, each move down the long corridor in opposite directions and I'm checking doors in the hallway. I open up one door and there's a girl holding a child. About Keeli's age and maybe she's just a little older than Shaeeah. So I open channel. It's quiet where I'm at, but with the open channel, I can hear what's going on elsewhere. I hear blasters, lightsabers, yells, shouts and all the normal chaos of war. 'I've got two non-coms here.' That's what I said. Because they weren't Jedi; you could look at them and tell. Rex's voice comes back over the open channel; hard and deadly, where everyone can hear it. 'Kill everything. If it's alive now, it better be dead when we leave.'" Jester looked down at the boulder, the silver sparkle and black opaque of granite. "So I follow that order. Then I decide to empty my blaster in that room. In case I come upon any more non-coms. It takes a while, longer than I thought. I'd never had a reason to use my blaster like that so I didn't know it would take that long."

He touched his scar again. "I didn't know that rate of fire was likely to melt the barrel though I knew it would get hot. Didn't know how hot." He paused a moment. "I just closed communication channels and manually adjusted the baffles in my helmet." He gave her a lop-sided grin. "Otherwise I'd be deaf as well as ugly. After the blaster is empty I find a corner and I hide myself in it. And I cry. I didn't even realize I'd had my blaster to my face until someone handed me over to the medics."

His hands trembled and he set them on the stone as though to absorb its eternal stability and tranquility. "You've never heard me say the remembrance because I always make sure to do it alone. Usually out in the forest. Because most of the time, I cry. I remember them. _Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum girl in the tower child in her arms. Vul kyr'am._ There are other names but those two are always first."

Jester looked at her, his eyes glittering with unshed tears. Saria took a deep breath and nodded. Her own eyes were wet and she touched his face with her fingers.

"I never believed you loved me because I couldn't love myself. For what I did, I wasn't worth loving."

"You did what you were ordered, Jester. You had no choice."

"But if I'm a man, human, then my actions are my choice. And if my actions are not my choice, then I am no better than a droid."

Saria sighed, running her fingers through Jester's thick, dark hair. "In the temple, you reacted according to your training. You had no time to think of making a choice. But when you did think…"

"I made my choice and deserted with Rex," he nodded. "It's good talking but I'm not sure I believe it. Not sure it will chase away nightmares."

"Probably not for a long time, Jester." Her voice was almost lost in the breeze.

"Thank you, Saria." He lowered his head.

They lay back on the rock together, though not touching anymore. It was too soon for touching, the wounds still too new.

After a while, Saria sighed. "Time to get back."

"I'll be there tomorrow, too, Saria. I know Sketch decided to have the surgery in the med barn instead of my place so his recuperation wouldn't be lonely."

"I think he just enjoys the pampering he gets from the cooks." Saria chuckled.

Jester grinned. "I wouldn't be surprised and it's not just the cooks. It's too bad..." He paused, frowned then continued. "It's too bad Suu doesn't share. Sketch would fit right in with that family."

Saria was silent, but Jester saw it was a thoughtful silence rather than an angry silence for bringing up _sharing_. Jester breathed in relief.

"I'll be there in case you need my strength or in case either of you need anything."

"I don't think I'll need you, but I would appreciate it. Sketch would, too." She thought a second. "Actually, you should be there when he comes out of anesthesia. I think you would be better than Edge to sit with him as he wakes up. You know him better. I'll be there, too, but my attention won't necessarily be on him."

"I'll be there."

"Thanks, Jester."

They started back, side by side. In silence for a short while then Jester spoke again.

"Saria. I have another apology. This one's pretty hard too and I want you to listen to the whole thing." He sighed. "I probably even want your help figuring it out."

Saria nodded, her face becoming a bit wan.

"You know I went to Cass Cjain's house that day and you know why."

She nodded.

"I went there yesterday to apologize to her. I would have used her to see if I could have sex with you. Not one of my better ideas."

"No." Her voice was small and it hurt Jester to think how he'd made Saria feel small.

"I would have used Cass, that's why the apology to her yesterday. For a while I fooled myself into believing that I would have gone home after I found if I could get hard." He stopped on the path so he could face her. "I wouldn't have stopped, Saria. I would have convinced myself that getting hard wasn't enough. I would fool myself into thinking it wasn't proof unless we had sex, then unless I came, then … to make sure that it wasn't just once. I'm glad now, that little brother paid no attention to Cass Cjain."

"But she's pregnant. About two months."

"That has nothing to do with me, Saria." He shook his head mournfully. "I haven't been hard for a couple of months now. Not since you said," he caught himself. "Not since I thought you said I had to share you with someone else."

Saria nodded. "I'm sorry I thought you were the father of her child."

"Hey, we're still working on my apology," he smiled at her and she gave him a small smile.

"So I would have used Cass and lied to her. I would have lied to myself and ultimately, I would have lied to you. I want to apologize for that entire thing. I want to make it up to you in any way I can." Saria was quiet, soft wrinkles in her forehead.

"I'll have to think about that one."

Jester nodded. "I know. It's convoluted and I'm not sure I have it figure out totally."

They walked, coming closer to the house and barn. She hadn't said anything more and Jester was a little worried at her silence. Still, it had been a relaxing walk. It had felt good to be talking with her and they were still friends.

"Saria," he asked softly. "I didn't mean to burden you with apologies too much today. I did want to talk to you about our child. I want to be part of this child's life. I don't have a lot of credits and I'd like those to go for Sketch's knee surgery; but I can make a lot of time when it's not harvest. I hope we can make some arrangement where I can take care of this baby while you're working and mentoring with Chymdura." He stopped. "I want to be part of this baby's life."

"That's what I want, Jester. I want you to be part of your child's life also. I know how important this is to you but it's important to me also. I don't want to be the only parent in this child's life."

Jester chuckled, a lump of worry dissolving. "I don't think that'll be a problem. Besides me, there's Cut and Suu." He glanced downward at his feet with a smile. "All the uncles this poor kid will be subject to. Shaeeah and Jek are getting pretty grown up."

"They'll be uncles, but you'll be his or her father." She actually saw Jester stand taller, straighter, a proud smile on his face as he opened the door of the barn. She stood at the door for a moment then laid her palm on his face and kissed his cheek.

**Sketch's Surgery**

They hadn't needed Jester and it was Edge who came outside the med barn to let him know the surgery was done and he could sit by Sketch. Jester stood.

"Thanks, Edge."

Edge didn't move out of the way. He looked down at the ground then at Jester, blue eyes pinning the brown. "I proposed to Saria."

"I didn't know that."

Edge shrugged a single shoulder. "She said 'no'. She's said or will say 'no' to most everyone except Kix, Chopper and Sketch."

Jester waited. Edge always thought about his words. "She's kind to everyone. She likes almost everyone. But _she_ asked Sketch to marry her. Sketch will say 'yes'. Chopper's hopeful and Sketch will share. More importantly, Saria will share."

Jester's brows drew into a frown and Edge continued. "Maybe before, she wouldn't have shared. She will now."

With those words, Edge stepped away from the doorway.

Sketch was unconscious on the cot, cocooned in blankets with his leg elevated and also cocooned. Just the tips of his toes peeped above the bandages but Jester smiled as he saw those toes were aligned correctly. Kix was sitting with him and looked up at Jester's entrance.

"Sit here, Jester." Kix directed as he stood. "As he comes out of it, he'll be groggy. Kix glanced into Sketch's face. "The thing we're most worried about is disorientation, confusion. Maybe he'll think he's back in prison, in which case call me, I'll be here. Maybe he go back to Order 66 or back into some battle." Kix did something with the monitor in his hands, checked the numbers and nodded. "Saria thinks you'd be the best one to keep him from panicking if that happens. She doesn't want him to move or struggle."

Jester nodded. He sat in Kix's proffered chair and took Sketch's limp hand into his. Saria had told him that people under anesthesia could still take comfort from human touch and voice. "Hey, Sketch. I'm here, my brother."

"I'll be helping Saria clean up. Just give us a call if there's any problem." Kix went into the room that Saria had designated the sterile area. Jester simply held his brother's hand, stroking the knuckles, talking to Sketch in a low voice; talking about the _good_ things.

He didn't know how much longer it was when Saria sat across from him and took Sketch's other hand in hers.

"How's it going, Jester?" she asked.

"Good from what I can tell. He's made slight expressions with his face, nothing stressed. Occasionally tried to say something, but his eyes weren't open so I guess it's like he's talking in his sleep. Nothing I could make out. His hands have twitched, gripped mine a little. I've been checking his pulse every so often like you taught me and that's normal.

"Good. Those are all normal reactions." Saria nodded, laying the back of her hand on Sketch's cheek. Jester lapsed into silence. He knew Saria wouldn't pay very much attention once he'd told her Sketch's progress. She checked his pulse, checked his toes and ran post-op diagnostics. Then she looked at Jester.

"How are you doing, Jester? I haven't asked that question."

"I'm well, Saria. Missing you, of course, but mostly it's been busy. I wake before dawn and don't get to sleep until," he gave a chuckle. "Until almost dawn. Cut and I working on the next planting, we're going slowly to include the brothers. Riven has turned out to be a mechanic as well as a pilot and says that speeder engines are not nearly as complicated as flyers. He's been very helpful in prepping the equipment and in fixing Cut's old speeder. Col wants to take some gifts to Dantooine with him and wants to find out what from Saleucami would be a welcome gift. Leven and Gekko are working hard to pass the debrief so they can also go to Dantooine; Dub and Pax are interested also. Checkout and Backup need watching, they're playing pranks on the cooks almost every morning and Suu isn't going to tolerate that for much longer." He looked at her. "And there aren't twenty heartbeats between the times I think of you." Jester looked down again at Sketch.

Sketch's eyes were barely open but he had a smile on his face.

"Hey, Sketch," said Jester, almost in a whisper.

"Thirsty." Sketch's voice was so quiet and cracked, Jester almost didn't catch it. But he did, bringing the bulb to Sketch's lips. Sketch's hand was also around it, but there was no strength in those fingers. Sketch sucked the water from the bulb. Then let his hand drop to his chest and Jester moved the bulb away. "How'd...go?"

"It went well, Sketch. Your leg is elevated and if you look straight down with your eyes, you might see your toes."

Sketch looked, his head making small stretching movements, then it relaxed and Sketch grinned. "Looks good." He let a deep breath out, as though he'd been holding it in since he'd going into surgery. His eyelids drooped, dropped and Sketch's eyes closed. "Where's Saria, Jester?" His voice was still low, but no longer a hoarse whisper.

"Chopper came and took her for a walk. She usually needs one after she's done something like this.""

"I'll remember that."

Jester dropped his head. Maybe Sketch would be taking care of Saria from now on. Maybe Chopper would be building her a house. He pushed jealousy aside. They'd be _good_ to Saria, maybe even better than he'd been. Jester raised his head to look at Sketch. His eyes were still mostly closed, but he had a smile on his face and his breathing didn't have the evenness of sleep. Jester continued talking.

"Then Djinn asked if he could have her company for dinner. But I think it's just to prove he's not embarrassed anymore. He and Saoha collected his bedroll and his little book from camp after dinner yesterday and weren't seen until sometime after breakfast this morning."

Sketch gave a small chuckle. His smile became wider. Both men were quiet for a while, letting the touch of their hands be sufficient. "Can you share yet, Jester?" came into the silence.

"I don't know, Sketch."

"Do you want to share, Saria?" Jester asked. "Edge said that he thought you might share Sketch and Chopper. They both share and," Jester paused. "They're both good men. So is Kix although he never seemed interested in women before you. He never really seemed interested in anyone."

Saria smiled. "Until Fives."

"Fives?" Jester's eyebrows rose. "Fives as in Fives who has two wives and a baby girl Fives?"

Saria nodded with a smile. "And he did propose to me. We've talked, but that's between him and me."

Jester nodded. "Just surprised, Saria. No questions." He swallowed. "They'd take care of you. Any of them or all of them. I ..I'd like you to have the house."

"No, Jester. You made that and I won't take it away from you."

"I made it for you, Saria." He gave her a lop-sided smile. "Besides I can make another one. Not too far away; maybe equidistant from Cut's and the pool or maybe tucked sunside of the big rock. It would go up even faster since I'd have the help of my brothers." He blushed slightly. "I've got some ideas for changes that I think a growing child would like."

"I'm sure any or all of them could make me a new house also."

"This one's ready for you and the baby, Saria. Please, let it be my gift." He held her hand in his, brought it to his lips and gave her fingertips a soft kiss.

"I'll think on it, Jester." Her face dropped to their hands and she laid her cheek along the back of his hand.

He didn't realize until he was at camp and staring into the fire, that she hadn't answered his first question.

 _Can you share yet, Jester?_ The words haunted him late past night and into the morning.

**Quad and Shaeeah**

Quad was sitting in one of the trees in the front yard. Chopper had deserted it for Saria's company at the thermal pool again. It had a good view and was comfortable. Quad was sitting a bit higher than Chopper's spot, almost hidden by leafy branches. Quad could see some of his brothers playing a game of chase with Jek and Barin, though Barin was more interested in chasing the light bugs that had started coming out. It didn't matter to the troopers, some of whom were helping him catch them. Kayl was sitting on the porch, eager to join, but forbidden even the soft chase game played by Barin. Although he could walk, Saria was concerned about his femur.

Sketch was on the porch also, his ankle and foot carefully wrapped and supported on a bench. The blanket was wrapped around the hot towels on his leg. He'd had the surgery yesterday and his foot, or at least the very tips of his toes, were in the normal position of a foot. Quad smiled at that. They'd said he wouldn't be able to walk until the knee was done, but the ankle was a start.

Shaeeah came out to ask Sketch something, probably if he needed another glass of juice or blue milk or any more dinner or stylus and flimsi pages for drawing or a blanket. Smiling, Sketch shook his head and Shaeeah gave him a quick hug then moved into the yard. The women delighted in spoiling Sketch.

As though guided by a magnet, Shaeeah came to the tree and glanced up with a smile. Her smile widened as she saw Quad. He smiled shyly back.

She wasn't as agile a climber as her brother or any of the troopers, but she was familiar with the branches. As she got closer to him, he tentatively held out his hand for her and pulled her to his branch. It was a thick branch, but not quite enough for two people to sit side by side on it. He started to move, but her voice stopped him.

"Please stay there, Quad." She took a slightly different branch, her legs swinging softly at the level of his hips.

They didn't speak. He didn't know what to say. She had touched him intimately, stroking him until ... He stopped that line of thought; he'd get hard and tent his pants. A more selfish part of his brain wondered what she would do then. When she spoke, her voice was a quiet whisper.

"I've been thinking about what happened the other day. What I did. I didn't give you much choice. I want to say I'm sorry." She bowed her head and inspected the bark of the tree.

"Please don't be sorry. It was …" he thought and reached his hand toward her, but pulled it back. "It was the most pleasure I've ever had in my life."

"That makes me even sadder. You should have had a lot more pleasure."

He had nothing to say to that and so was silent again. Then his mind traveled along another path.

"Why did you do that?" he asked. He'd been wondering that ever since it happened.

"Curiosity." She said. "Isn't that cruel? I was simply curious about," she paused and blushed. "Men and…" She didn't finish her sentence.

"No. I understand that. I'm curious about women. I'm curious about so many things. I'm scared for reasons I don't understand and curiosity makes things less scary, easier to approach." He looked down, avoiding her eyes. He'd been a trooper, supposedly without fear. He'd been in battle. Nothing should be scary. He knew he was a coward.

Shaeeah nodded and thought a moment. "Right now, I'm curious how it would be to kiss you." She whispered in a tremulous voice. "I'm scared also, but want to kiss you."

His breathing tightened in his chest and he closed his eyes. He could feel himself getting hard. She must have taken his silence for yes though he didn't know if it was or not. She slid to his branch; he could feel her feet on one side of him. He opened his eyes, holding out his hand so she didn't slip. She bent her knees, but he let one leg slide off the branch to give her room. She sat with both legs on one side of the branch, slightly sideways to him, shyly glancing up at him.

She leaned against his chest and his arm came around her shoulders, his other arm rested lightly on her legs. She smiled and relaxed even more, one hand on his arm. His arms trembled.

She felt good in his arms and he leaned forward a little bit, softly nuzzling her face, breathing her scent. He smiled and closed his eyes. He dared a small kiss on her lekku. She dared a small kiss on his jaw. She leaned her head against his chest. He gave her another small kiss on the top of her head.

"I like the sound of your heart." She whispered.

"It's fast right now. Holding you is making it fast." He whispered back. He shifted, pulling her closer, but with open arms in case she wanted to leave. She gasped as she felt him against her leg. He wasn't hard, not really, just sort of interested. She twisted slightly, putting her hands on his chest. Her face was down and her own breathing was fast.

"Quad," she whispered, not sure what to say. One of her hands crept up to his face. He bent his face to her hand, softly kissing her fingers.

"I can't kiss you any more than that, Shaeeah. I just can't." He whispered in her ear. "You'll have to lead if you want a kiss …."

"I do, Quad. I want to kiss you." She tilted her head up and pressed her lips against his. He moaned into her mouth and she could feel him thicken at the side of her leg. His mouth was moist, warm and Shaeeah softly licked his lower lip. She tasted him; the salty richness of the bantha steak, the sweet goldenfruit he'd eaten after dinner, some richness that was totally Quad. As softly and hesitantly, his tongue slipped along her bottom lip, she touched his exploring tongue with hers. He shivered. Both her hands held his face now, softly exploring his mouth with her lips and tongue. She leaned into his shoulder and his face followed hers. His arms held her strongly, but loosely. He gave her small kisses, on her face, on her lekku which caused warm waves to ripple in her body.

"May I touch you, Quad." She asked solemnly. He nodded.

"As I said the other day, anything."

Her hand reached down between them, into the waist of his pants and she clumsily drew out little brother. She felt, once again, its velvety smoothness, its firmness, its tension. This time she looked and saw him in the silver moonlight.

This time, she watched as she explored him with her fingers. Sometimes she watched little brother as it twitched or expanded under her fingers. Sometimes she watched his face. As she stroked him harder, Shaeeah concentrated more on his face.

"Please, Shaeeah…" his voice quivered and she smiled, delighted to hear some delicious note in his voice. She reached up, put her hand to his cheek and guided him to her lips. She kissed him, touching his tongue, teasing his lips with her own. Quad shivered. He'd never dreamed that kisses could be so tantalizing. Her other hand stroked him, squeezed him with her fingers. His hands came up, his fingers shook as he took her face into his hands, holding her for his mouth and lips and tongue to play with her. He breathed hard as he kissed her, slipped his tongue into her mouth. He held her while both her hands now played with his hardness.

Quad gave a whimpering cry that Shaeeah swallowed into the kiss and his body relaxed onto hers. His breathing was hard, but becoming normal. He leaned back into the branch of the tree, tears in his eyes. She caught sight of his tears and her own expression was worried.

"Quad?"

He shook his head as he tucked himself back into his pants. He brushed off her shirt.

"I'm sorry, Shaeeah." His fingers stroked her face. "I will do anything for you. But this is wrong. You're thirteen and I'm thirty-two. One of the younger ones, but still too old."

"I'm almost fourteen, Quad. In a couple of days. And you're sixteen." She put her hand on his face, touching a tear. "And you haven't had the chance to live in most of those sixteen years." She whispered then kissed him on his lips.

 


	8. Decisions

**Decisions**

Saria sighed.

Crux

Crux had accepted her refusal as genially as he would have her acceptance. He had flirted with her; gently at first, as though they'd newly meet then with more innuendo and sparkling wit. After her refusal, he had asked her how he'd done and told her he'd still come to the med barn to give her shoulder rubs.

"And questions, Crux," she'd told him. "You don't know it all yet." He had laughed and grabbed her in a hug then given her a soft kiss on her cheek.

"Maybe not, Saria, but I feel like I've been given a treasure."

Pax

She had cried at the hurt look of Pax and gave him a hug and a long sweet kiss. He told her that he would go to Dantooine; he wouldn't be able to stay on Saleucami with her there.

Kix

She had held Kix like a younger brother. "You don't love me, Kix and it would be a hardship for you to try".

He had nodded, his head bowed, his forehead to hers. "Will you teach me, Saria? Can I come with you and learn?" He had looked into her eyes with a worried expression. "Am I good enough…?"

"Yes, Kix. You are wonderful. You are more than good enough."

It hadn't been what he wanted, but it had been enough.

Edge

Edge had merely nodded though his blue eyes seemed sad for a moment. He climbed into the loft, where his bedroll was, and stayed there until the games. But at the games, his face once again showed his enjoyment and only once did he glance at Saria with a gentle look of longing. His other looks at her were with friendship.

Dub, Gekko, & Leven

Dub, Gekko and Leven were a laughing threesome. They'd proposed _en masse_. She knew it was because they were scared to propose alone.

"Any of us three," had exclaimed Dub, a smile wreathing his face, the small scar under his eye, high on his cheekbone pulled into a smile as well.

"Would be ecstatic to marry you," added Gekko. His face held a tattoo on his cheek back by his ear; three solid bars of herf intersected by a sensuous line, as well as a scar on his jawline.

"Or all of us," included Leven. "We can share." Leven's face was untouched by scars, though Saria had seen his scars when he played chase. They were on his body, one running from his shoulder, down his chest, to touch his opposite hipbone.  She had asked how he survived that and he had merely shrugged.

"We'll build you a house, watch children, work hard, for you Saria." Dub held one hand while Gekko held the other.

"We'll be entertaining, kind, considerate, pamper you," promised Gekko.

Leven had stepped in front of them and taken her hands from Dub and Gekko. "We will love you, Saria." He had kissed her hands, then moved his hands around her waist, moved his head close to hers. One hand came up to caress her face and he had kissed her. He trembled as he kissed her, but he had kissed her.

Yes, a man with a scar like that, with a scar from a near-fatal injury, he'd be brave enough to kiss her.

"No." she had said, smiling. But she had given all three kisses. Gentle sisterly kisses for Dub and Gekko. Leven had kissed her like Chopper first kissed her, without knowledge. She kissed Leven long and hard, she gently touched his lips with her tongue and invited his to play with hers. He'd accepted the invitation hesitantly, unsure, but his arms had tightened around her. Dub and Gekko knew enough to move away. Leven had pulled back slightly but still held her tight.

"More," he asked. "Please. To know, to experience. No expectations of anything more, Saria." He grinned slightly. "If this is no, yes might have killed me."

She chuckled and had kissed him to all distraction.

"Thank you," he had whispered then smiled. "Thank you, very much."

He was more experienced than at the beginning of that kiss and had walked away stiffly, muttering something about his deece which had Saria smiling.

Boil

Boil made her distinctly uneasy. It was his stillness and his keen observations, his aloofness, his confidence.

It also, she had to admit, made him attractive.

"He'd sat next to her during one of games. He'd been one of the first to ask her to marry him.

"I do find you very attractive, you know." He'd said after a few moments of watching the game. "I'd love to take my time with you, flirt with you, court you like a citizen might court you. I'd like to progress from kissing your fingertips to kissing your lips and further."

"You'd be very good at it, Boil."

He nodded, accepting the compliment as a simple statement of fact. "Instead, I must ask you when everyone else is asking you. I have to present myself immediately as half my brothers are doing. Because of that I'm just one in a crowd."

Saria smiled at that. "Hardly, Boil. You cannot get lost, even in this crowd of your brothers."

Boil smiled at that and continued. "It takes me time to become relaxed with someone. Now, more than ever after three years of pushing people away. I know I seem arrogant and distant. I'm really not. Waxer and I are occasional lovers so you'd have to share. We have Numa, again another person to take into consideration. They both like you. We've asked Sketch to join our family so you can take that into consideration. He hasn't made a choice yet, though he might if you join us." He sighed. "Saria, will you marry me? I will court you slowly."

She lowered her head. "I find you attractive as well, Boil. But my heart has already been taken."

"By Jester or by Sketch?" he asked.

She couldn't answer that.

"You'll be going back to Jester then."

She had nodded.

He'd given her a gentle kiss on the cheek, his fingers playing with a curl by her ear. "People can change, Saria. Waxer and I were rivals before we were friends, friends before we were lovers and lovers before we were partners. You can build on whatever you have with either Jester or with Sketch as long as you don't keep looking back to what might have been."

"Thank you, Boil". She put her hand on his cheek. "Thank you, my friend."

Djinn

Djinn invited her to sit with him for dinner and she accepted. He asked her to marry him when he handed her a goldenfruit.

She was soft in her answer and he had simply said, "Ok."

"I take it you don't really love me." She chuckled.

Djinn thought about that as he peeled her another goldenfruit before handing it to her. He decided that she smiled with her entire face, with her entire body. "I guess not," he said. "Although I thought I was. It was just lust and I'm so new to all this …" He raised his shoulders in a shrug. "I would have made you a good husband."

"Lust has its place in the world, as well. But you're right. It's not love and it's not worth marrying for."

" _That's_ worth marrying for," he said as he hurriedly licked juice from his fingers. "Wisdom."

"Then you're wiser than most people." She smiled.

He smiled back and leaned in for a kiss. It was gentle and lingering and sweet with goldenfruit.

Chopper

Chopper had known as she had walked up to him and, for an instant, his face became hard and angry. Then the anger vanished though some of the hardness remained. "It wasn't because of the scars," he said, not even a question though Saria answered anyway.

"No," she replied, "not because of any scars." She took his hand in hers and laid her forehead against his chest and his hard face became troubled. Tenderly, he caressed her hair and gave her a small kiss on the side of her head; where she had first kissed him.

"I can't even explain why," she said. He heard her muffled sniffs, then her voice again, "All I can say is that you're not Jester. I wish I did love you, Chopper."

"Why?"

"Because you'll make a wonderful husband and father." She looked into his mismatched eyes.

That felt good.

"I'll need a wife for that, Saria," he chuckled into her ear. "But we are friends."

Saria sighed. She had to tell Sketch.

* * *

**Can you share?**

Saria met Jester as he came down the hill from camp.  He saw her standing there, Edge beside her.  As Jester slowed his walk and waved the others from camp on toward breakfast, Edge also started walking down the incline.  Crux gave Jester a pat on the back before continuing.  Checkout and Backup were running in that ground-covering lope, wide grins on their faces, and Jester wondered what pranks they had planned.

Jester stopped in front of her, a worried frown on his face. He took a deep breath and licked his lips slightly.

"Can you share, Jester?" she asked and he groaned. He'd been asking himself that for days. Last night he had stared into the fire for hours, chasing the questions around in his mind.

She glanced down the hill at the departing men then into his eyes. Her lips firmed. "Because I can." Her arms crossed in front of her. "And I want to," she whispered. She turned and slowly began walking down the hill. Jester fell in step beside her.

"Your brothers are wonderful. There is a lot in them all, and in you, that I love. Loyalty, kindness, strength of will." She smiled. "Stubbornness, imagination, enthusiasm." Saria looked into his eyes. "I could go on for hours extolling all your virtues that I have learned. I've fallen in love, Jester. With all of your brothers and with you again."

Jester frowned and swallowed. He couldn't share that much. She must have seen that in his face because she reached around his waist. His arm went around her shoulders. Suddenly his mouth was dry.

"I don't think I…" he began softly but she cut him off. That was unlike her. She usually listened and Jester looked at her with his soft brown eyes. She was nervous and, for an odd reason, that made Jester glad. She hadn't quite made up her mind; which meant he still had a chance.

"No you don't have to try to share with all of them, Jester. I just want to let you know that I do love them, that everyone of them has a place in my heart. That I will never forget Crux's flirting or teaching Chopper how to kiss or the happy eagerness of Baffle or the proposal from Leven, Dub and Gekko. I will never forget the solidness of Edge and even Col's telling me about his love, Ehveen. You and your brothers are all unique individuals, but there are so many qualities you share with them. Strength, courage, integrity."

"We were made that way." Jester shrugged slightly.

Saria nodded. "Yes, you were. But during your lives, different events served to change you. Personality also comes from the experiences we have in life. One experience you all share is the GAR, another is desertion. But everything else comes out of different experiences. Why was Leven able to kiss me but not Dub or Gekko?" She looked at him, expecting an answer.

He thought for a moment. "Because Leven almost died and he wouldn't want to pass up the chance for a kiss, no matter if he was ridiculed for it. For Dub and Gekko, the embarrassment would make them hesitate." Jester gave a half-grin. "I don't think they would hesitate for long."

"Probably not." Saria smiled back. "And Chopper. Why was Chopper able to remove his shirt the other day at chase?"

Jester nodded. "Because you kissed him and he realized that his scars didn't matter." Jester looked at her speculatively. "That means that you kissed him with his shirt off."

"At the pool." Saria blushed and Jester gave a loud laugh and tightened his hug on her.

"I love you, Saria. You have many of the qualities of my brothers, generosity, laughter, curiosity, stubbornness." He grinned at her. "Yes, stubbornness is a virtue." Jester gave her a quick kiss, releasing before she had time to object. "So our personalities out of Kamino; and there was only one basic personality the Kaminoans were aiming for, have been modified by our experiences."

"And what do experiences come from, Jester?" she asked.

His lips thinned then twisted in thought. "Choices?" His reply was soft and she nodded.

"Other things too, I'm sure, but choices. We make our choices and we live through them." Saria looked down and softly kicked a pebble from the path.

"Can you share, Jester?" She stopped walking and put her arms around his shoulders, her fingers curling into his hair. "Are you willing to lose me because you cannot share?"

He pulled her closer to his body, his arms around her. He bent his head, bowing into the side of her neck. Jester closed his eyes. She smelled like herself, sweet and mellow and so much like home. "I love you, Saria. I will always love you. I miss you every morning I wake and you are not there. I miss you every evening when I go to sleep and reach out for you but cannot touch you. I will miss you in the future just as much. You have seen what sharing does to me, Saria."

"No, Jester. I have not seen what sharing does to you. I have seen what confusion does to you. I have seen what infidelity would do to you. Would it be the same if you were sharing me? If it was your brother on the other side of the bed?"

"I don't' know, Saria." He whispered into her ear. "Please don't leave me."

Saria pulled back slightly and he felt the queasy roil of rejection in his stomach, but it was only slightly and she kept her hands threaded in his hair. "How have you felt these past days when your brothers here were all courting me? How did you feel?"

He was startled at the fierceness in her voice. Her face was flushed and he knew she would begin to cry in a moment.

"I felt bad that I had …" he looked around for the words. "That I chased you away. I felt good to know that my brothers would take care of you." He gave her a quick grin and slowly touched his forehead to hers. "I was ecstatic to find out you carried my child."

"So you felt good that your brothers would take care of me?" She questioned, her face hard.

He nodded.

"You felt good to know that your brothers would kiss me and love me and, in time, make more children with me." She repeated, her hands coming to his face, cupping his jaws in her capable hands.

"Yes."

She asked again, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears. "Can you share me, Jester? Because that is your choice to make."

Jester sighed and shivered, remembering Rex's words. He loved Saria and if he could do no more than hug her and kiss, then that would be enough. "I'll try, Saria. I will welcome your choice."

"Thank you, Jester." The tears started tumbling down her cheeks. "I love you, Jester and I have missed you all these months of misunderstanding. I have missed you holding me and your laughter and your hugs and your kisses. I've missed you watching out for me and your body beside mine in bed."

Jester hugged her, pulling her close to him, his head tucked in her neck, kissing her, nuzzling her, whispering words of love in her ear. "I love you, Saria. Have I ever told you that?" He couldn't remember that he had. "I'll tell you that every day, Saria. Every hour if you wish." He moved until he was face to face with her, their foreheads and noses touching, his fingers curled in her hair. "I will spend my life telling you and showing you that I love you." His hand dropped to her belly and he spread his finger widely over her pregnancy. "We will love this child, you and I and whichever of my brothers you chose."

"None, Jester. I've chosen none of your brothers yet; not in the way you mean." She took a deep breath. "I've invited Kix to be my assistant for some training, then my partner if he wishes."

Jester nodded. "He was an excellent combat medic. I think he'll surpass your expectations and I know he wishes, Saria. So very badly."

"Can he live with us?" she asked.

Jester smiled. "Can you share me, Saria? I think Kix would rather share me than you."

"With Kix? Yes, Jester, I can share you. With Sula or Saoha or Fives? Yes. With Cass Cjain? No, not after this mess. Perhaps I could have before, I'll never know. If you ever wish to be shared with anyone else, Jester, ask me. I will share you with almost anyone who loves us." She hugged him, her head against his chest. "I never thought I would share you, but your brothers have shown me so much about myself as well as about you and them."

"In time, then," he whispered, "which brother or brothers would you have join us?"

"Sketch. I want Sketch with us."

"If I can share with anyone, it would be Sketch. Anyone else?"

"I don't know." Her hands released him, slowly, reluctantly. "We need to talk so much more."

Jester's hands drop until only one arm circled her and they started walked toward the back yard.

"I'm starved." She said, sniffing a bit. "Emotional scenes always leave me hungry."

Jester chuckled. Saria was coming home. "I know."

* * *

**Decisions - Suu**

Suu glanced over to the fire, where Numa was maintaining the low, steady flame needed for the eggs. Shaeeah had already retrieved the blue milk and was preparing the juice. They'd run out of muja just yesterday and Jek had suggested diluted goldenfruit; it was sweet, it was juicy and, most important, it was in season and plentiful. Shy had gathered the two large bowls, the eggs, a little milk and a few spices for flavoring to start mixing the eggs. He was becoming quite proficient as a kitchen assistant considering he'd never eaten outside ship's mess or rations. As she finished pulling out the last of the muffins, a treat instead of the regular toast, she saw Shy tap an egg on the edge of the bowl and not move. She watched him for a second longer, noting the perplexed look on his face, the confusion edging toward fear. Suu stepped beside him.

"What's the matter, Shy?"

"It's not…" he began tentatively then reverted to trooper mode as he did when confused. "Sir, this egg is not behaving as an egg should."

"Let me see, Shy." He held it up for her inspection, shoulders back, as _at attention_ as he could be sitting down. He had tapped it firmly and tried to separate the two halves with one hand as she had shown him. But the egg would not separate easily. She took it from his hand and eyed the crack a bit more.

"It's hard boiled, Shy. See? It's already cooked." She pulled a shell fragment away so he could see the cooked albumen.

Shy's brows drew down. "So we will not be able to use it for scrambled eggs?"

"No. Just set it aside and someone will have a boiled egg instead of scrambled. It must have gotten mistaken for a raw one."

"Yes, sir." He thought for a moment. "I've never had a boiled egg; I'd like to have it."

"Certainly. Boiled eggs are good for traveling and to keep for a snack. I send some out with Cut when he's in the field, but scrambled eggs usually taste better."

"Not if they're reconstituted." He grinned as he cracked another egg against the bowl. "Uh, Suu. This one is also boiled."

That's when she began to suspect. Suu moved next to Shy and picked up an egg at random, set it on the edge of the table and spun it. It spun like a top, round and steady. Shy picked up one and spun it also. He stopped it with a finger then lifted up his finger. The egg didn't move. He nodded. "This one is also boiled."

"I suspect our friends," she spun another egg; "Checkout and Backup have been here. Test them all, set aside any raw ones. I have to think."

"You're angry?" Shy asked as his fingers quickly spun eggs. So far, they were all boiled.

"Extremely." She crossed her arms in front of her and tapped her foot. "Numa. I don't think we'll need the fire.

"Yes, aunt Suu. I'll bank it low for dinner."

"No, Numa. Simply put it out. With water."

Numa turned to look at Suu with surprise but saw the anger in her face and in her posture. "It will make it more difficult for us to cook tonight," she said slowly.

"We are through cooking, Numa. I believe Checkout and Backup will be doing the cooking from now on."

Shy snickered as he continued testing the last of the eggs. "Good joke. On them." Then he frowned and the fear came into his face again. "Sir, will you …? How will I eat, sir?"

"No one will starve, Shy." Suu comforted softly. "I will think after this confrontation and then we will talk. If nothing else, we do have rations."

"Yes, sir." His face held its fear, but he nodded tersely as he stood and took a position in parade rest at the door.

Several men, already in line with their plates in hand, watched in confusion as the fire was extinguished. Almost everyone was within earshot, but Suu stood at the fireplace and waited a few more minutes while Shaeeah set out the muffins and Numa the bowls of hard boiled eggs. Cut, seated near Rex and his family, gave her an upraised eyebrow. She flicked her eyes toward the grinning oncoming pilots and he nodded his understanding. Jester was walking down the hill, his arm around Saria. Cody, seated next to Sketch on the bench, was frowning at the unusual activity of Suu and the kitchen crew. Checkout and Backup could not restrain their wide grins. Suu could tell by their grins or confusion, which men knew of this joke.

"Attention, everyone." Suu called out in a voice barely above her normal speaking tone. Several men actually came to attention for a moment, before relaxing. "It appears that our gunship pilots, Checkout and Backup, have boiled all the eggs." She paused to listen. There was laughter from some men, a few chuckles spread through the crowd, looks of confusion from some men who didn't know a boiled egg from scrambled. Yet. "It is quite a funny joke." Suu let them relax then continued speaking.

"This means no scrambled eggs. It means no eggs with which to bake anything, like bread. It means that the muffins we cooks made last night are your last baked goods. Please enjoy them." She turned to go back into the door, flanked on one side by Shy and on the other side by Numa and Shaeeah. Suu did a sharp about-face to face the hungry men. "It also means that Checkout and Backup have volunteered to be your cooks."

Another about-face had Suu at the door, into the kitchen. Numa, Shaeeah and Shy followed her.

Dare had loped up to the door, confused anger in his eyes. He grabbed the door before Suu could close it and motioned to his glass. He was dutiful about drinking his nutritionally adequate and absolutely tasteless liquid meals. Then he tapped himself in the chest with the fingers of one hand. Suu had been scrambling him eggs with blue milk, enough milk to make the eggs a soft pudding he could suck into a straw. Or she would softly poach them so he could eat the runny yolk through the straw. She knew he looked forward to at least one delicious meal a day.

"I'm sorry, Dare. They've boiled _all_ the eggs."

Dare turned to Checkout.

"Come on, Dare. She's got some eggs in there." Checkout gestured toward the kitchen.

"And I'm not going to cook," shouted Backup from near the smoldering, wet fire pit.

Dare simply stood there, staring at Checkout, his fingers tightly clenched in a fist. Then he turned and ran back to the barn.

Suu shut the door on the beginning confusion in the back yard.

"Numa will you take Dare with you to find some eggs? Show him places were the nuna roost out near the pool. Then make sure he knows how to prepare them himself."

Numa smiled. "Of course, aunt Suu."

"May I go also," Shy voiced.

"Of course, Shy. But I'd like you back here in the kitchen with me before noon. I don't know what's going to happen at lunch."

Shy gave her a lazy smile. "I'll be here, Captain."

It was a joke, his only joke, and she smiled back. "Get to it, trooper," she ordered and watched him lope off with Numa toward the med barn.

"What should I do?" Shaeeah asked.

"You go check with the families and see what, if anything, they will do. Jester and Saria can go to their house, of course. But will they take anyone with them? What about the Tanos? Aureki cooks wonderfully, of course, but do they have sufficient supplies? What about Fives' family?" She thought a moment. "We'll take care of Sketch, of course, but I'll want him to learn to cook. Who else?"

Shaeeah thought a moment then shook her head. "Jek will want his big brothers, but I saw Gekko and Leven laughing. They knew."

Suu smiled. "Shaeeah, how do you think Checkout and Backup knew that boiled eggs don't show from the outside? You saw Shy's confusion and they wouldn't know much more about eggs than him." Shaeeah's eyes widened.

"Jek!"

"I suspect your little brother had as much a hand in this as anyone."

"So he's going to be …" Shaeeah's eyes glittered.

"Out hungry with the troopers and don't look so pleased about it." Suu admonished. "Now, who else do you nominate to our table for dinners?"

"Chopper. Quad. Kix. Edge. Maybe …" Shaeeah thought. "Maybe a random uncle each day. To remind them what they'll be missing."

"Go and find out about the other families." Suu muffled her laughter. Shaeeah had a devious streak in her.

* * * * * * * * * *

"She can't do that, commander." Checkout was facing Cody. "She's the cook."

Cody merely watched him. He didn't answer to commander any more.

"So what are you doing to do, sir?" demanded Backup.

Cody looked at Sketch, who watched with a lazy grin.

"What am I going to do about what, Backup?" He ignored Checkout.

"About the cook, sir."

Cody leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, his hands clasped together. "It seems to me that you've made a grievous error. You've assumed that this is a military set up. You've assumed that I'm the commander. You've assumed that you have some special position. You were not listening to the meeting the first night. Perhaps you ought to go out and interview some of the men who were more attentive. Maybe look up the definition of family."

Sketch interrupted, softly. "Perhaps you ought to remember who has taken on extra work. Do you think Suu makes twelve loaves of bread daily because it is enjoyable? Do you think they normally eat one or two steaks a day? Do you think they run through blue milk as though they bathed in it? Suu wakes in the early dawn before anyone else and is usually prepping for the next day's meals when I fall asleep."

"But she's just the cook." Checkout exclaimed sullenly.

Cody guffawed; Sketch smirked and shook his head. Behind them Rex laughed and both pilots jumped in surprise to see Rex and Cut.

"Just the cook?" exclaimed Cut. "If we were shipside, I'd call you out one-on-one for referring to my wife that way."

"I'd second you, Cut." Rex put a hand on his shoulder.

"Gekko, tell the others that I won't be in camp tonight, I'll be making sweet with my wife so she'll feed me." Cut shook his head. "Checkout, Backup, sit down." Gekko moved off as both pilots sat cross-legged on the ground. Backup looked about to object.

Cody stood, giving his portion of the bench to Cut with a hidden wink and Cut nodded to him before sitting. Cody stood at his side, in the subordinate position. Checkout and Backup were thinking military, he'd give them military. He stood behind Cut in parade rest; as if this were a tribunal.

"I'll admit," Cut began, "no one gave you any choice about coming here. You were rescued from Kamino but no one objected. Are these pranks your way of objecting?" He looked at the two men who shook their heads with 'no,sir'.

"I don't think we've asked too much of you. Just get healthy and make yourself some future plans." Cut rubbed his palms together thoughtfully. "We've asked for some help around the farm, not a lot, but some. For the most part, men are being helpful and things were running smoothly. Mostly we want to give you time. Time to regain what has been lost. Time to plan and prepare for the future; whatever future you chose for yourselves."

He was silent, looking both men in the eyes. "What did you arrive here with?" Checkout flushed and Cut continued. "What do you think I arrived here with?" Again he paused and let the men consider his story told the first night.

"Everything," he spat angrily, "everything you have been provided with, from your clothes to your food to its preparation, from the thermal pool to the games you play every evening and the bedrolls you sleep on, from the medical care provided by Saria to whatever else is needed has been provided for you. Most of it by my wife whom you so disparagingly refer to as 'just a cook'."

Cut stood and glowered at the two men. "You will need to apologize to my wife. She still probably won't cook for you, but she might allow you the use of her house, her kitchen and her utensils to cook. If you apologize to Numa and Shaeeah and Shy, they might show you enough cooking to keep the other men from rioting." Cut glanced at Rex. "And I think Aureki simply won't feel like cooking in her condition."

Rex shook his head. "I doubt it."

Cut pulled his eyes back to the men. "You have today to apologize. I'm leaving for town tomorrow and I'm taking Suu for a much needed, couple of nights away from here. Maybe you'll appreciate her when she gets back."

Cut walked away, his shoulders stiff. "Just a cook," he muttered angrily, "just a cook."

* * *

**Decisions - Sketch**

Sketch had seen them coming down the hill for breakfast, Jester's arm around Saria, her body pressed close to his. He had wanted to cry.  He had wanted to turn to Cody sitting next to him and beat him with hard fists simply because he was there.  He had wanted to take the boil eggs and thrown them as far as he could. Instead, he swallowed his sorrow and bit into a muffin that was moist and sweet and only served to underline the bittersweet nature of love.

Sketch couldn't really be unhappy that Saria chose Jester. It was what he had wanted when she'd run into the house that day. He hadn't realized that would change. He would miss talking with her more than he'd miss her kisses and he'd miss her kisses like he missed walking. However, Jester had found her and loved her a year before Sketch arrived, before any of them arrived. There was no denying that Jester loved her.

He'd known when she'd come running into the house the day of the argument that she'd return to Jester. You didn't cry over someone that much and not love them. He'd given her rules, guidelines for handling his brothers. He'd given her time. He'd given her advice. He'd tried to make himself into a brother for her. He'd _known_ she would return to Jester and he'd still fallen in love with her. _Di'kut_. Sketch wondered, briefly, if she would have stayed with him if he had not confessed his impotence. It gave him a small assurance of pride that she might have stayed with him, after what had happened.

_They'd come down the hill and sat with him while they ate hard boiled eggs and muffins. Saria sat close to him on one side while Jester sat his other side._

_"I'll be going home with Jester," she told him._

_He had shrugged. "I thought you might, Saria." He had paused, not moving or saying anything for a long moment. "I'm sorry you didn't choose me." He laughed. "I probably would have made a lousy husband; not being able to take care of you with my leg and all." She understood what he referred to. "But I love you. I would have loved being a father to your child."_

_"I know that, Sketch. I love you." She looked at Jester. "I told Jester I want you in our life. I want to share you, with you. However it's phrased." She glanced down at her plate. "I want to know the details of sharing."_

_Sketch looked at Jester, leaning against the wall his arms crossing his chest. "Jester doesn't share, Saria," he said gently. She said nothing, but Jester did._

_"I'm willing to try, Sketch."_

_Sketch saw hard unwillingness in his body and shook his head. "You'll need more time, Jester, to get use to the idea." He paused, looking into Saria's eyes. "I'll need time too. I've got a knee to get fixed and then a year of physical therapy." She knew it was an excuse and accepted it as the gift he was giving Jester._

_Jester's body softly relaxed. "If that's what you need, Sketch."_

_"It is." Sketch said, even as he mentally castigated himself for giving her up. Again._

_Saria laughed. "Me too. I'm already feeling as graceful and delicate as a bantha with a jet pack. I'll need time also."_

_"I want to share. I want to have you with us in all things." Jester put his arm around Sketch. "I will learn, brother."_

So, at some indefinable time in the future, he would have a home with Jester and Saria. At some indefinable time he would be a second father to her child. But the future, itself, was indefinable, subject to change without notice and Sketch could only take his days as they came.

The camps shifted. Cut had gone into Issuya taking Suu with him. Jester moved from his camp back to his house as did Saria. At times he asked for help in building and offered credits for the labor. The ex-troopers all refused the credits. They were helping their brother and his wife build a home. For their labor, Jester showed them how to bake bread and there was always a delicious lunch provided for the workers. Unlike the lunches provided by Checkout and Backup.

Jester's camp became Dantooine hopefuls. Col was there, of course, and told of his time on Dantooine, a myriad of details about living a semi-nomadic life. Pax, Dub, Gekko, Leven, Countdown, Crux, Kaver and Dare were with him; though Saria insisted Dare and Kayl sleep either in the barn or at the house. Kayl moved to the scout's camp, as did Shaeeah. Chopper spent a lot of his time there, though no one knew where he slept, as did Quad, Shy, Djinn, and Riposte. Cody, Echo and Rex led the last camp, keeping an eye on Checkout and Backup. Jesse was also in their camp with Riven and Baffle. Edge stayed at the barn and Kix moved into Shaeeah's bedroom at her insistence. The shifting of the men provided new friendships and loyalties because they were sorting themselves into men with a shared vision. Col's camp, as it was now called, were the most directed. They provided most of the labor for the upcoming spring planting, asked the most questions, requested Aureki teach them about money and dealing with merchants, and asked Jek to teach them how to ride eopies. Scout's camp became a camp of ghosts, showing up for breakfast and dinner then vanishing like spirits into the forest. They went to the rim of arable land, beyond the caldera and spent a few days in the desert. Cody and Rex had a difficult time with their camp. Checkout and Backup had a falling out over the incident of the boiled eggs. Checkout had apologized to Suu before Cut had taken her to Issuya, Backup had not. Jesse was a morose presence, striking out angrily and bitterly at times. Riven spent most of his time with mechanical duties, necessary and not, citing the inhospitable atmosphere at camp. Riven had confided to Sketch that he was scared he wouldn't pass his psyc, though he hadn't said why. Sketch spent much of his time drawing, sometimes taking the long trip on crutches to visit Jester's home with his brothers.

The very lovely Saoha came to visit him one evening and entice him for a small walk in the silver moonlight. Sketch was lonely, Saria didn't visit him as often in the evenings anymore; so he smiled and allowed himself to be enticed. He was slow on his crutches but Saoha didn't seem to mind. Several days earlier, he'd given her the picture he'd drawn of her. She'd said it was beautiful. He tried to be gallant and told her it was her beauty that inspired him.

Sketch wished he could put his arm around her slender waist as they walked, but that wasn't going to happen. He sighed softly. She smiled and reached around his waist, her hand on the small of his back. Not close, because of the crutches, but touching. Sketch smiled.

They sat to rest on some round, flat boulders. Saoha lay back to watch the few stars bright enough to shine through the light of two moons. Sketch lay on his side to watch her, memorizing the planes and lines of her face, the curve of her cheek, the sweep of her nose. Soon enough, she forgot the stars and turned to him, brought her fingers to his cheek and drew his face to hers. Their kiss was soft, sweet and lingering. Sketch reached out his hand to her face, touching her silken, rosy skin, and their kisses got deeper. She curled closer to him. He felt her warmth, her body, against him. He liked the kisses and felt no urgency for anything else, because there could be nothing else. Sketch felt as though time had stopped.

A soft, warm rain began and rather than jumping up to hid under the shelter of the thick trees, Saoha laughed and threw back her head. Sketch gazed at her.

"Dance for me, Saoha." He asked softly, knowing she would dance beautifully. She bent, kissed his lips, ran her tongue on the inside of his lower lip and danced in the rain, in the forest. Just for him.  For him alone. He had more pictures in his head, more drawings to do. Drawings he wouldn't show Numa and Shaeeah. Drawings of him and Saoha; drawings of what he would do with her, if he could. Drawings of wishes.

Saoha slowed her dancing, her breathing fast, and came to him. Joy in her eyes and laughter on her lips. Her lips were sweetly warm as she tugged off his shirt. Sketch resisted, a little, before giving up his shirt to her tugging with a laugh then helped her with her shirt. She lay next to him for more kisses. His hands resting on her waist, drawing up her ribs towards her breasts, pulling her tight against him as the tempo of his kisses increased. They became harder, more demanding, his tongue slipping between her lips, teasing her.

His arm held her head off the stone, but his other hand slipped to curl around her breast, his fingers gently tugging her nipple.

"You like this, don't you?" he said, knowing, not asking. "You're letting me know what you like, aren't you?"

"Yes, I didn't think you'd object. You seemed open to possibilities. I can stop guiding you if you wish." Saoha nuzzled her head against him as she spoke then stopped and looked into his eyes. Her smile was warm, enigmatic. Sketch touched her lips with his fingers.

Sketch smiled, he had a beautiful woman in his arms. "No. No objections. I can tell you're guiding, not demanding. I trust you know what you like. But please don't demand from me." He bent his head with a frown. "Don't demand because I can't… Surely you know that I can't…." The words died in self-loathing.

Saoha was solemn and put her hand to his bowed face, her fingers caressing his cheek, his lips. "I know that you are filled with hurt. I would take that hurt from you, if I could but memory always remains. We shall go no further than you wish." She smiled and leaned forward, pressing her breasts against him, her palms on his chest.

"It's not what I wish; it's how far I can..."

She tickled his nipples with her fingers. He shut his eyes and breathed deeply. That felt good all the way down to his groin.

"You so like to be touched," she said softly. "If you wish, I will touch you anywhere and everywhere with no expectations." She smiled an unexpectedly sweet smile. "But you must touch me, as well."

"No expectations," he reiterated to her and she nodded.

He was deliberate; slower than she wanted. His fingers barely brushed against her breasts; as he watched her nipples tighten into dark purple pearls with the drops of rain catching on her skin. She moaned softly. Her eyes were luminous as he stroked her body everywhere with his fingers. He could feel the sexual tension building in her body. He liked the slower tempo. It gave him time to feel. She also touched him. Her fingers combed through his hair, her hands caressed his face, his shoulders, his chest. She whispered warm lust in his ear. Her mouth kissed him, nibbled, nipped, licked, sucked. Saoha brought lustful rumblings from his lips. He was dazzled. He was relaxed and happy to be with Saoha, here and now.

"Shall I give you my feelings?" she offered.

"What?" He asked in bewilderment.

"I can feel your emotions. As someone loving you, I can feel much of what you are feeling physically. What most people don't know about Zeltrons is that we can also control someone else's emotions or open to them and let them live our emotions for a short time." Saoha blushed. "Usually it is a proposal for marriage or a long-term relationship."

"I'm flattered." One side of Sketch's face lifted in a grin. "Two women in little over two week."

They both laughed and Sketch bent his head to catch her lips with his, but she felt his hesitation and didn't open her feelings to him.

She straddled him, high on his hips to avoid jostling his knee, and he grimaced momentarily at his lack of response. She bent to kiss him as his hands slid up and down her back. He reached between her legs and gave a surprised exclamation at her wetness, at her desire for him.

It had been a long time since he'd had a woman to love. He didn't really count Saria; she had always been Jester's. He loved all the women he'd ever had, Saoha would be the third and he'd love her too. Love her with all his heart while she was with him. Love her memory when they were apart. He'd never thought to have someone love him after they'd twisted his leg; never thought to love after what had happened in prison. Yet, Saria had loved him, perhaps he _should_ count her, and now Saoha loved him.

His cupped hands squeezed around her breasts and his fingers tugged at her nipples. He smiled lazily, reached behind and pulled her downward, reaching one breast with his mouth. He teased it with his teeth delicately then quickly sucked it into his mouth. She gasped, coming. He was surprised at how quickly she'd come.

She looked at him, her wide eyes pleading with him. He knew. "Yes, Saoha, please share your emotions with me." He said softly, not knowing what to expect, but understanding that it would be an intimacy he would never forget.

Sketch gasped, not only in the aftermath of her orgasm, that relaxing lassitude that swept over his body, but also in the depth of her love, her desire for him, for so many of his brothers, the want for a child, the sometimes-rage at her beloved sister, the love for that sister, the love for Fives and occasional exasperation, the sparkling delight in the love for baby peach. The way the wind was the sensuous fingers of nature and the tingling of rain on her skin. He felt her pleasure of co-piloting _Silver Bird_ , the beauty of the stars, the dexterity of her fingers. He felt emotions from her past, the first man to touch her, to please her, the pain of her father's death, the feelings of betrayal at her mother's remarriage, yet love also for her mother and the new men filling a void in her life. He felt the hardness and strength of his body next to hers, his touch on her skin. He felt his love for her and Saria and his other loves reflected back into him. All in a fraction of time, all in some eternity.

Sketch looked at Saoha, breathing hard. "No wonder that's usually a proposal." He was almost overwhelmed with how good she felt, how much she enjoyed him. How satisfied she was. How much _he_ had pleased her. _He had pleased her_. Sketch made a low sound in his throat, between a groan and a growl, as he pulled her closer to him, pulled her into his arms to protect her. To please her more.

She fell asleep in his arms. Sketch smiled as he watched her sleep. The rain had stopped sometime during their lovemaking and it would be morning soon. Someone might see them. She was naked, absolutely beautiful. She gently opened her eyes, kissed him, curled tighter into his arms, and returned back to sleep.

Sketch heard the footsteps of men, running in a soldier's quick pace. He smiled, embarrassed, and waved as Boil, Waxer, and Numa went by. Boil smiled as they went by. Numa slowed and glanced from the corner of her eyes but Waxer coughed and she moved on by. Waxer had turned his head and winked at Sketch. Sketch was glad it hadn't been the entire scouts' camp.

Sketch heard laughter from somewhere above him, but couldn't move his head back far enough to see who.

"I'll be down in a moment, Sketch." It was Chopper's voice.

He heard the rustle of tree branch and brush.

Saoha purred and stretched, her eyes slightly open. She was leisurely wakening, softly rubbing Sketch's bare shoulder, curling her hand in the hollow of his throat.

Suddenly, Chopper was there on the boulder with them. Gracefully, he sat cross-legged at their heads.

"You two had quite a night." He said with a smile. "So did anyone within hearing range." He pointed towards where they'd come from yesterday evening. "That would include the house, maybe the barn and," Chopper pointed back the way he'd come, "Scouts' camp." He ruffled Sketch's hair with his hand, softly bent and kissed Saoha on her cheek. He knew kisses on the cheek were acceptable. "You also had a couple of visitors."

"Yeah, Chopper. I saw Boil and Waxer and Numa. I suspect I'll be getting a parental encounter from Waxer." Sketch felt good, except for his leg, it was a bit cold and might… Saoha push her body against him, gently pillowing his knee between her thighs. He felt no pain and she was warm.

"Probably," Chopper nodded his agreement. "Did you see Leven? Or Baffle? Or even Jesse?"

"No. I was pretty oblivious to them." Sketch had a chagrinned look on his face that almost covered the triumphant grin. Almost.

"I felt some people. I did not know who they were. They meant no harm." Saoha smiled. "Two took their pleasure at hand."

Chopper laughed. "They did at that, Sa'." He caught Sketch's warning look. "I can call her Sa', she said so."

Sketch leaned forward to touch Saoha's face with his as she nodded. He smiled. She loved him, he satisfied her; she had opened herself to him and he _knew_ this.

They were walking back to the house for breakfast. Chopper wasn't optimistic about what would be served so Sketch offered to cook breakfast for the three of them. They were slow, keeping pace with Sketch, Saoha between them, all three wrapped in the scent of her pleasure.

"So, did you just happen upon us, like Baffle and Leven?" Sketch asked

Chopper laughed. "No, you just happened to have the … good fortune … to pause under my sleeping tree. I've been up there every night since we got here." He shrugged. "It's a comfortable tree."

"Who was the last one?" Saoha reached around Chopper's waist, pulling him closer. He shivered as she drew him closer to her. Was it an invitation? He would ask her. Then he glanced at Sketch and decided he would not ask. Sketch would share, but sometimes ... Chopper stopped thinking about it as he answered her question.

"That was Jesse. He was …" Chopper shook his head. "Not happy."

"No, he was devastated. So terribly hurt and sad and angry and dark." she looked at Sketch, lightly reached around his waist. "So very much the opposite of you last night."

"I'll talk with him, Sketch. He doesn't know I was there, so he won't be … " Chopper tilted his head to one side.  "As embarrassed." Chopper thought a moment. "Saoha, were his feelings really devastated or simply unhappy because he couldn't..."

"Devastated," she reiterated. "It is a pain so deep it is coming to define how he sees himself."

"What else?" Chopper asked her, his hand lightly caressing the small of her back, almost absently.

"Anger, at himself. Something he did."

"Guilt?" He caught his hand caressing her and stopped. Maybe he'd ask her in a couple of weeks after talking about it with Sketch.

"Yes, components of that. A lot of that. Regret." Saoha frowned. "He is so unhappy and we cannot help because he is not letting go."

Chopper frowned then slowly nodded. "And all tangled up with sex."

"How do you know that, Chopper?" Sketch was moving a little faster now; they were on the last part of the pathway, where it was flat, solid and opened more widely.

"I watched him, Sketch. I think I have an idea of what's bothering him. He came in after Order 37."

Sketch nodded his head in the direction of the house, leaving the problem of Jesse to Chopper. "Are we going to be able to face Baffle and Leven today?" There was a grin on his face.

"I'll just be myself. No one knew I was there," said Chopper.

"No one?" asked Saoha softly as she looked up at him from beneath her flirting eyes. He turned a little red at the knowing glance from the Zeltran empath.

Sketch laughed. It was a good day.

* * *

**Decisions - Jesse**

Jesse was alone. He sought solitude and was now on the big rock. He avoided the chase games every day in the front yard. He avoided groups at dinner, being one of the first or last to arrive. Mostly though, he avoided the women, not that there were too many to avoid.

Chopper sighed. He'd been like that once. Avoiding people, avoiding groups, avoiding his brothers; avoiding everyone because he was a worthless, soulless, ugly flesh-droid. Like Jesse, he'd had his scars. He was under no illusions that he could help his brother much. All he could do was provide a mirror for Jesse. The hard work would be Jesse's. Chopper knew that also.

Easily Chopper climbed the big, flat boulder of black granite interlaced with quartz and sat near Jesse. A handful of moments later, Jesse sighed and stood.

"Stay, Jesse. Tell me about it." Chopper stared at Jesse's face; at his bendu tattoo overwritten with cut scars, some almost three years old, some as recent as twenty days. They'd cut the tattoo because the bendu was the symbol of the Republic and all the best it had stood for such as the Rights of Sentience. It had once been Jesse's core belief. Chopper could see a bitter reply form on Jesse's lips but Chopper merely looked at him, letting the scars on his own face do his speaking.

Jesse looked at Chopper, looked at his scars, and the reply died unspoken. Jesse sat but no words came for a long time. Chopper waited.

Jesse's words came on a breeze, so soft Chopper could barely hear them.

"She wasn't a beautiful woman, Chopper."

"They're all beautiful, Jesse."

Jesse thought about that. Chopper could see him chewing his lower lip then give several small nods.

"She was in her early twenties with blue eyes and dark brown hair. She might have been pretty if there hadn't rebellion. She had a broken nose, scars same as any brother. She was a fighting woman; decently trained and strong enough to break Ansel's arm when they captured her. She kicked Chon in the balls…" Jesse looked down and absently tossed a pebble across the boulder's flatness. "During interrogation. After he took his turn." He glanced at Chopper who merely gazed into the distance. Jesse swallowed and continued. "You could tell she had a temper. And the cussing that came from her," Jesse shook his head, "would have put any trooper to shame. We asked her questions. She didn't answer."

Jesse was quiet again.

"She sounds beautiful," said Chopper, nodding. "Dark hair, blue eyes, capable." Chopper smiled. "Even kicked her rapist in the balls. I think I like her."

"She's dead, Chopper."

"I know that, Jesse. Do you say remembrance for her?"

"No. I don't need it to remember her. Most of the time I'd like to forget her."

Chopper sighed. "Remembrance is also for the living. What's her name?"

"Elarlu Cihon. Her friends called her Ela." Jesse sucked in his lips. "We mocked her by calling her Ela. Mostly Chon as he took her."

"Took her where, Jesse?" Chopper's voice was angry. "Call it rape if it was rape."

"It was rape." Jesse admitted softly. "Hard and vicious. They were armored when they raped her. The plates coming together as they pushed, pinching her skin. The armor bruising her."

So after the other guys, you took your turn…" Chopper wasn't sure of that, but it seemed likely for the hate Jesse had shown himself.

"Yeah. I took my turn. She'd stopped fighting by then. Guess there's a limit to anyone's temper. She was crying. Not loud like she expected help. Just real quit, tears running down her face along with the blood from her nose and mouth. When I took her," Jesse paused, exhaled. "When I raped her, it wasn't what I expected. I didn't enjoy it."

"You expected to enjoy that, Jesse?" Chopper kept the shock out of his voice, but only barely. He hoped he sounded … interested, not condemning.

"I didn't know what to expect, Chopper. I'd never had a woman before." Jesse's voice was angry and sharp. "I was curious, I'd never had a woman before." He rasped the words between his teeth. "I wanted to know what it was like."

Chopper bowed his head. By Jesse's harsh reply, he hadn't totally kept the shock from his voice. He could understand Jesse wanting experience. He hadn't had a woman, not really, but he was curious. Still, he wouldn't trade Saria's kisses for Jesse's experience. He wouldn't trade getting shot at by a company of droids or what they'd done to him in prison for Jesse's experience. Jesse continued talking.

"She raised her hand slowly. I was ready if she tried to attack me but she just touched my tattoo, traced the part on my nose and cheek." Jess paused, reliving that touch.

Chopper knew that he would do the same if he ever told anyone about kissing Saria. He'd pause, remember; relive the experience.

Jesse continued. "I remember that part the best, Chopper. Sometimes, I have good dreams where she keeps touching my face. Not just the tattoo or the scars, but both sides of my face. I have dreams where she's touching my eyes, drawing her hands down my cheeks, tempting my lips with her fingers." Jesse closed his eyes, reliving dreams; the tentative smile on his lips at odds with the tears in his eyes.

"Those are dreams, Jesse. I'm interested in what happened."

Jesse opened his eyes and nodded. "As she's touching me, she looked in my eyes and said, 'You have no right to this'. I ran. I jump up and ran out of the room, out of the barracks. I couldn't get far enough away from that truth."

"When I come back five or six hours later, she's dead. I would have got her out of there, Chopper, if she'd still been alive." Chopper heard the tears in Jesse's ragged plea. Jesse made no effort to keep then back and he wiped his eyes with the back of his fist. "I lodged an official complaint, told my squad that wasn't going to happen again. A day later, they hold me down and cut my tattoo. I was headed to med when I decided to desert." Jesse's voice hardened. "Because my squad wouldn't have done that without permission from the captain; they wouldn't have even been off-duty without the captain's go-ahead."

Chopper shook his head. "Jesse, you are so….." He bit his lip. "Screwed."

"You spent all those years being screwed up." Jesse's voice was sharp, but Chopper caught something plaintive in it.

"Yeah, Jesse. Screwed up, not screwed. There's a big difference." Chopper was quiet as he watched Jesse pull his knees up to his chest and curl his arms around them, dropping his forehead on his forearm.

Chopper knew it would be hard to do this. He'd seen Cody come out of debriefing Rex, rank with sweat and shivering. For some reason, another man's hell was always worse than your own. He would have asked Cody, but he'd seen Rex looking at Jesse with pity ever since they'd arrived on Saleucami. Rex seemed to know something that Cody didn't. So Chopper had asked Rex if he could debrief Jesse about the incident. Rex seemed to understand what he was talking about.

_"I should have done it the first day. He was open, ready to talk." Rex shook his head. "But there was so much to do. Now he doesn't want to talk about it. Especially to me. It'll be hard, Chopper. Can you do it?" Chopper had so affirmed and Rex had taken him at his word. As Rex had always had. That trust had been one reason Chopper had survived. "Take a minute to talk to Suu about Jesse, first." So Chopper had asked Suu and she told him of Jesse jerking from her touch, his calling her ma'am, the way he walked as if he had no right to be where he was._

Jesse had come to prison after Order 37 was enacted. Chopper had known what he'd done when he had seen Jesse's face watching Sketch and Saoha make love on that rock.

_Chopper had been watching them, as hard as the stone they were on. He wasn't touching himself, though. He was taking pleasure from Sketch's delight. Sketch, who thought himself incapable with a woman. Sketch, who thought no one would want him with his twisted leg. Chopper's pleasure had been in seeing Saoha's lust-filled eyes and smile while Sketch kissed her, hearing her moans of lust as Sketch loved her. Chopper's pleasure had been in knowing his brother was no longer broken._

_Separately, Baffle and Leven had also walked along that path and seeing them, had watched surreptitiously, pulling at themselves with their hands, bringing little brother to attention, smiling at Saoha's generosity to their crippled brother._

_Jesse's reaction, when he'd seen the couple making love on that boulder, had been more telling. He'd leaned against a tree and cried. Then he had beaten his head against the tree, enough to leave a purple bruise on his forehead the next morning. Most telling, he had hit himself in the genitals. Hard. Twice. Chopper didn't know any man could do that. You had to hate yourself to do that._

Chopper sighed and looked sideways to Jesse.

"First, why'd you take off your helmet? This was interrogation, wasn't it? The other guys kept theirs on, didn't they?"

"Yes. And yes." Jesse paused. "I wanted …"

"You wanted her to think of you as a person," supplied Chopper.

"Yes." Jesse nodded softly, a worried look on his face.

"You were the rapist-interrogator. Rape does not work when you're trying to terrorize someone and then take off your bucket so they can see you're human too. As soon as you did that, you lost control of the interrogation." Chopper paused. "Did the others see you do that?"

"Yes." Jesse's reply was wooden, bereft of any emotion.

Chopper sighed heavily. "That's when you lost your squad."

Chopper scratched at his head, ruffled through the bristly scrub. He wasn't used to hair yet. He had decided to grow it. Even Suu had run her fingers through the dark and silver with a smile. Jesse had been touched by Elarlu-Cihon, called Ela. Jesse shaved his head when he'd been a trooper, otherwise the woman would have run her fingers through his hair.

"Second. You let her touch you."

"It felt good."

"For how long, Jesse? About two seconds?" Two second's worth of pleasure for years of pain is usually not a good trade."

Jesse simply bowed his head. Chopper relented, just a bit.

"Was it?" he asked.

"Huh?" asked Jesse.

"Was it? A good trade? The pleasure for the pain?" Chopper asked softly, gentle concern on his scarred face. "Because sometimes it is."

Jesse thought as he rubbed his face with the back of his hand. "I don't know," he finally voiced.

"Good enough, then. At least to make you think." Chopper nodded. "Next. You didn't finish. I bet you lost your hardness as soon as she looked you in the eyes and you knew something was going to happen. I bet you haven't been hard since."

Jesse nodded glumly. "Not a lot of incentive for getting hard in prison."

Chopper snorted. "You wouldn't have gotten hard in a Zeltros bordello. Deny that if you can."

Jesse simply shook his head and looked as though he were about to start crying.

"Then," Chopper was grim. "You went and fell for her."

"How the hell do you know that?" Jesse jerked upright.

"Because that's what screws you, Jesse. You fell in love with someone, raped her, raped yourself in the process, let her get killed. Knowing that if you'd acted differently, there would have been a different outcome." Chopper dropped his voice to a whisper. "Knowing that you had the authority or capacity to get her free; if only for a short time."

Jesse did start crying then. Chopper was holding his shoulders, then hugging him as his cries turned into body-racking shudders.

"I don't think there's anything you can do, that'll clean that out of your mind, Jesse." Chopper's voice was gentle as Jesse's body emptied of tears.

"I thought I'd go back and atone for what I'd done. Make it up somehow." Jesse's voice was barely audible.

"Make it up to who, Jesse? Make it up how? Is that a planet they'll even take you to?" asked Chopper, still holding Jesse in his arms. "You do have to be alive for regrets and, right now, you're too messed up to even stay alive."

"Well, maybe that'd be best." Defiance filled Jesse's voice, but it was defiance in search of death.

Chopper thought a moment, his hand rubbing Jesse's back as Jesse moved back to his sitting position. "No. You've got too much to do. You've got a debt to pay."

Jesse looked at him with shocked curiosity.

"Count it as a debt to pay," repeated Chopper with a nod. "A big debt, a life debt that'll take you forever and keep you busy."

Jesse nodded slowly. Death sounded quiet, peaceful; but he'd been made for the chaos of war.

"You go through the out process. You go through psyc as often as it takes. You do it as long as you need to, to make sure you'll stay alive." Chopper's voice was steel. "You let them know what you've done. You let them know you regret it and you'll be paying back for that mistake."

Jesse's face became a rictus of terror and tortured pain. "How can I tell them, Chopper? How can I explain...?"

"Ask for one of the Zeltrons. She'll feel your emotion; she'll know how much you hate yourself for what you did. She'll forgive you."

"How can she?" wailed Jesse.

Chopper shrugged. "I have no idea, Jesse. Maybe for the same reason Ela reached up and touched you softly instead of trying to take an eye. She broke one guy's arm, got another in the balls after he'd raped her. Why did she touch you instead of going for an eye?"

"I'm not..." began Jesse.

"You are such a selfish person, Jesse. Just thinking of yourself. Really, you need to consider some other factors."

"Selfish," shouted Jesse. "I'm trying to..."

"I'm, I'm, I'm" mimicked Chopper. "Just stop a minute. Take a breath."

Jesse did.

"How many troopers are here?"

"Twenty-four."

"Count again, Jesse."

"Including Rex and others, thirty-one."

"Of those men, are there any who did not participate in Order 66?"

"You. Cut."

"Anyone else?"

"Not that I know of."

"OK, twenty-nine men have something to atone for. Who took the Jedi temple?"

"The 501st."

"And were Rex, Echo, Fives, Jester, Countdown, Pax, Kix, included in that number?"

"Yes," Jesse was glum.

"Do you know what they did on the upper levels of the tower? Because that's what Rex and his squad were assigned. Rex was with the general. Do you know what Rex did? Why he decided to run?"

Jesse nodded. He knew. The entire 501st knew. Jesse had been at the temple as well, but his squad had faced three Jedi and been cut in half, literally and figuratively, before the last Jedi had died in a rain of blaster fire. Not children. Not even the youngling padawans but warrior Jedi. They could have taken a company if they'd been acting in concert. He had wanted to yell at them to act as a team.

Chopper continued. "How about Order 37, anyone here you know of, who did not participate in Order 37?"

"About half the guys here." Jesse mumbled.

"Right. Because the others had already deserted and were in prison by then. That means about half the guys here probably also suppressed civilian populations with torture, used rape as interrogation."

"Why don't they seem torn up about it?" Jesse asked.

"Some of them are. You just haven't noticed because you're moaning over your own problem. If it makes you feel better, they probably haven't noticed that you're torn up either."

Jesse was quiet, chewing on his lower lip. Then he shook his head. "I don't know how to make amends, Chopper."

"Then ask. You can ask me, I've got some ideas I'll mention after you've seen psych. Ask Rex, Echo, Fives… what they think needs to be done. Ask Ahsoka. Ask whoever does your psyc. Ask Cody. Ask Suu. That should give you a list for the next ten years. By then you'll be domesticated and you can ask civilians."

"Domesticated!" Jesse gave a laugh half-choked with a sob.

"Jesse," Chopper's voice was kind. "You've hurt yourself enough over this. It's time you paid Ela back for reminding you who you are and what you believe."

Jesse nodded. He wondered for a moment, what he would have become, where he'd be now, if he had finished that act of rape. If he had continued to push his hardness between her thighs bruised by armor. If he had come. If he had put his fist in her hair and pulled back her face for a demanding kiss to prove he was stronger. If he had laughed at her tears, punched her across the mouth, bit bloody circles on her breasts with his teeth, left bruises on her arm from his grip, on her body from his fists. In the end, they had kicked her to death.

Jesse wondered who he'd be if he had done that, instead of running, when she touched his face and gently said, "You have no right to that."

When he had come back and seen her broken body in the cell, he had carried her to the morgue and gently washed her. He has washed the blood from her body, the muddy boot prints off her skin. He had washed between her legs. He had straightened that dark hair around her face, using his fingers to comb it, gently pulling out tangles as if his roughness might hurt her. He had straightened her body from its fetal, protective curl; he had straightened her fingers from where they'd been broken. No one would be permitted to claim her. Jesse wished someone could have, she needed to go home.

He didn't have the right to wear his bendu anymore, but he'd earn it back. Day by day, he'd earn it under the watchful eye of the woman who haunted his life, day by day until he died.

He bowed his head.

" _Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum_ Elarlu-Cihon."

* * *

**Decisions - Chopper**

Chopper had hammocked himself in the branches of one of the trees, his feet locked in the crotch of separating limbs, his shoulders and body supported by branches. It was surprisingly comfortable and he'd been sleeping there since the day after their arrival on Saleucami. It was almost ten meters above the ground. Chopper scratched his head, feeling the still-unexpected softness of hair. He had decided to grow his hair shortly before their escape; it was now about a finger joint's length and just moving from bristly to soft. It was an invitation to touch; both Numa and Shaeeah loved rubbing their fingers in his hair. Aureki and Suu had each run their fingers through his hair; Aureki with a shy pleasure and Suu with a gentle laugh. Saria had... Chopper closed his eyes and remembered her touch with a wide grin. Chopper rejoiced in their touches. Fine lines of silver marked one side of his hair, marking his old scars. It was not unattractive.

He was not unattractive. He was scarred, but he was not ugly. Chopper knew he might never find a woman of his own, but he was worthy of such a woman. He nodded to himself. Rex had said to make plans but Chopper was too busy learning who he was, too busy finding his strengths, too busy learning to like himself. Chopper, he realized, was a good man, a moral man, a strong man, a kind man, a brave man. He was smart, that came from Kamino, but he was also wise and that came from experience. Some of his brothers came to talk with him, asking him questions, asking his opinion. He was a man who could be trusted, a man who could be loved; a good brother, a good friend. He grinned as his thoughts took a lustful turn. One day he hoped he would be able to define himself as a good lover.

Ahsoka stared up the tree at Chopper.  No less than any other trooper were his shoulders broad and his arms strong. The clones had been engineered for muscle, for strength, for endurance. She knew the scouts, Waxer and Boil, were leading some men out on 35 click runs at least daily. Rex was in his element, sparring for several hours each day, between the conversations with Cody and Echo, in between debriefing men. They were all exhausted in the evening, the troopers because they hadn't had good exercise in years and Rex, because he had to be better than all the others. Combined. She smiled softly, sometimes wondering if he'd always been so... Of course he had. She loved him for it.

Some man had already been cleared by their small committee, though Rex had not. Debriefing and clearance was tedious although their committee was working smoothing and quickly: Rex and Cody for military affairs, Kix and Saria for physical health, Sula and Saoha for emotional psychology, Echo as, well, simply because Echo was good at catching things, asking a trooper a question that had him squirming, finding a previously unnoticed weakness. Chopper had been the second to be cleared and occasionally sat on their little committee next to Echo, sometimes whispering something into Echo's ear.

Col had been the first cleared and had spoken to her about going to Dantooine before she even knew he'd been cleared. They were leaving tomorrow; she as the pilot, Saoha as the owner/co-pilot. Their passengers: Col, Dub, Gekko, Leven and Pax along with a contract to transport a cargo of medical equipment Fives had found that was actually paying for the trip. There were other troopers interested in Dantooine, but only these five tomorrow.

"Chopper, come on down." called Ahsoka. "I've barely seen you since I landed."

"I met Barin," he reminded, not moving from his perch. "He's a great kid. You and Rex do good work. You come on up to my abode. There's a great view."

Ahsoka smothered a laugh. All the troopers seemed to take to Barin, to adore her son and Cut's boy.  They all took turns holding Sula's baby or making sure her needs were covered. Ahsoka sighed, all except Rex. He only touched Barin and even then, only when Barin initiated the touch. The troopers played with the other children, but those three showed them a possible future, what their own children might look like. "Well, me and Echo do good work, too and I'd really prefer..."

He was down before she finished her sentence.

"I'm sorry. I forgot."

She blushed and glanced down at her still-slender waist. "You know?"

Chopper grinned. "Echo told me during the escape. He wanted to get me moving. Not that it's a secret; not the way your husbands walk." He shook his head. "Not the way you're starting to walk." He eyed her closely. "If someone really looks, there is a bit of a rounding." Unconsciously, he reached to touch her belly then pulled his hand back as he noticed what he was doing.

She smiled at him, he seemed centered, grounded. "I wanted to talk to you to find out what has happened to you since that I left." He frowned at the memory of her departure from the 501st, at his insubordination of Order 66 and the years in prison.

"The committee cleared you, but I wanted to make sure you were all right."

"You always were possessive of your company." He smiled as he pointed to a large, sun-warmed boulder. "Let's go sit over there," He gave her his arm. Lightly, she put her hand on his, but he didn't flinch. He smiled at her expectation. "I don't do that anymore."

"I noticed that in the ship, but thought it might be just an immediate reaction to escape. Saoha told me the emotions were overwhelming." She sat cross-legged, on the boulder, Chopper beside her, stretching out his legs as he leaned back on his elbows.

He shrugged. "That was what locked it in; freedom, seeing you, Rex. But it's there now and it's not going anywhere, anymore. Whatever it is." He paused. "Maybe I'll ask Saoha or Sula what emotion it is, because I certainly don't know."

"They tortured you while you were in prison," she moved her hand to touch new scars on his face and he bent so she didn't have to reach as far. He closed his eyes and smiled, enjoying her soft touch on his face, her fingers in his hair. She trembled. This was a new Chopper; not angry or defensive or emotionally scared. But strong, weathered, settled. She withdrew her fingers. He opened his eyes and shrugged.

"First battle is always the hardest. I guess it's the same with torture. After they told me that you and Rex and most of Torrent were dead, they didn't have anything else that bothered me." He shrugged. "After what Slick had done, these guys weren't very imaginative, simply" he paused searching for word to describe what they had done, "physical. The nightmares packed up and left. I pretty much lived through everything that scared me." He thought a moment. "I'm not what I could have been but ..." He was still and left the remainder unsaid.

"Broken men," she said softly. After a moment's thought, he nodded.

"Yeah, that's what we are. Broken." He turned to her slightly, drew his fingers over his chin. "Broken, but fixable." He grinned.

"You're an optimist!" she accused with a smile and he laughed. Something she thought she would never see. Chopper laughing.

"Guilty," he said, between his laugher. Then he grew serious. "What else could I be?"

Choppers let the soft warmth of Saleucami soak into him. "Look at my life. I am a clone, just one of two million identical men coming out of Kamino and they did aim for one, identifiable personality. Now I'm ... unique, myself. I've survived injuries that have killed other men. I survived a traitor's manipulation to become one of your and Rex's best troopers, one of the most trusted men in Torrent. I recognized Order 66 was wrong and did not participate in it. I've survived prison and torture since then. Now I'm free." He smiled, matching hers. "I have no right to be anything other than an optimist."

She hugged him tightly and he hugged her back. They sat together for a while, silently basking in the mild sunlight of Saleucami, their faces turned toward the warmth.

"What are you going to do?" she asked.

He shrugged.  "I don't know yet. That's what I think about up in that tree. Sketch and I get along and he'll need help for a while, so I might go with him, where ever he goes." Chopper glanced into her eyes, a grin tugging at the corner of his mouth. "Especially if he goes off with Fives and family. Sula gave me a wonderfully long kiss the other day and it wasn't 'thank you for carrying the baby'."

Ahsoka chuckled. "Yes, I can see the attraction of that option."

"I might stay here on Saleucami for a while, if too many other brothers don't stay. It's a good place to think about possible futures. The work is physically hard which frees up my mind and there's Cut's family as well as Jester and Saria for company."

Ahsoka nodded. "Good friends, good work. Both Echo and Rex say they learned a lot here. Not just about farming, either."

He watched her, wanting to see her reaction to his next option.

"Echo invited me to Shili for a visit." He saw her smile and her eyes crinkled in delight. He knew she approved, and would enjoy his visit.

"The trees are taller on Shili than here," she offered as incentive.

* * *

**Decisions - Quad**

_"I'm almost fourteen, Quad. In a couple of days. And you're sixteen."_

Quad thought on those words often. He and his brothers had generally taken to doubling their ages to what their faces showed. It simply made it easier to deal with anyone outside of the GAR, though why ages were important was still beyond him. Funny how it was one of those things that always came up in conversation. But Shaeeah had lived with her father for almost a decade. She understood aging as no one except another brother did.

He was sixteen standard years. If he looked in his thirties … well, that was only appearance; so ephemeral that anything could change it; a scar, the stubble of not shaving, age. He'd seen happiness make some of his brothers look younger. He'd seen pain and worry age them beyond their years. Appearance was unimportant.

" _And you haven't had the chance to live in most of those sixteen years."_

Quad thought on those words also. She was right. The first ten years of his life had been spent in training on Kamino. The next three had been as a trooper, then as a sergeant in the GAR. He'd been proud to serve and there'd been good times with his men and his brothers, but the time hadn't been his. He'd belonged to them, not to himself. There had been two years of increasingly distasteful duties. The last three years had been a living hell which he'd chosen as better than the nightmare of serving as an Imperial storm trooper. They said he still belonged to them, but he didn't believe that any more. He hadn't believed it for a while before deserting and certainly not after he'd been imprisoned.

Cody had defined and refined that for everyone. They were men; sentient, living, soulful men. Still, he hadn't had the chance to belong to himself; to do what he wished, to even have time to find out what it was he wished for. Cody had said that was why they were on Saleucami; to learn what they wanted and to plan for it. Rex, Cut, Echo, Fives, Jester; the ones who'd had lives, they all said it. You decide what you want and you plan toward it.

Shaeeah found him sitting on a large, sun-warmed boulder. He was alone and he seemed lonely in the late afternoon. She climbed up the boulder to sit next to him and he smiled and gestured to the tiny sliver on the horizon. They didn't speak for a while, simply watched the second moon of Saleucami rise over the horizon.

He sighed deeply and looked at her with a gentle smile, as though trying to memorize her. Her fingers crept closer to his hand. He shifted, stretched his shoulders a bit and reset his hand slightly closer to hers.

"If you're cold," he offered quietly. "I could hold you." He chastised himself for stupidity. The night was warm.

"I'd like that." She answered and moved closer to him, into his arms.

He pointed out one of the few brighter stars in the Saleucami sky. "What's that star called?" he asked. As he brought his hand down, his palm gently rested on her leg, slightly above her knee.

"Jerangur." She raised one hand to point out several other stars. "See how they make the back of an akul? That's the story of Riuren's Rage." Her hand came down to gently rest on his hand and her fingers curled into his palm. His fingers curled around hers, his thumb caressing her knuckles.

"I've never heard of it." He turned his face to her. She had taught him to kiss four days ago.

"I'll tell it to you." Her face turned to find his breath warming her cheeks, his gentle eyes watching her. Her breathing paused then came more quickly. He leaned forward and gave her a gentle kiss. She accepted it, let her mouth relax, silently wishing for more, silently urging him on.

He caught those silent thoughts through the tension of her body and kissed her more deeply. He softly slipped his tongue between her lips, touched her own tongue. He brought his free hand to her face, softly stroked her lekku which caused her to gasp. He jerked back quickly.

"Did I hurt you?" His voice was concerned.

"No. It never felt like that. Like.." she couldn't think of how that touch of his hand had felt. Something beyond what she'd ever felt. "It felt _good_."

"Shall I do it again." He asked, a small smile lighting his face at his discovery.

"Please." She begged with a smile.

He did, stroking her lekku. Gently at first with his hand, then with kisses. She told him there were called tchin and tchun and they had a life of their own. He had noticed they moved in soft caressing waves against his body when she was like this. He had seen them curl in annoyance at her brother's antics. He had seen them twine about themselves protectively when she played chase. They were most sensitive behind her ears and she sighed with pleasure curled in his arms as he nuzzled, kissed and nibbled.

Quad took the tip of tchin and softly sucked it. She whimpered and then had to assure him that was, most definitely, pleasurable. He did the same to tchun and then softly set his teeth upon her lekku. A wild rush of emotion swept thru her and she called out his name as she held him tightly, shivering with something other than the coolness of the night. He was delighted to give her such pleasure.

Shaeeah didn't know anything could feel so good. She looked at Quad with glazed eyes. She didn't know where to go from there. He had no lekku to reciprocate. She kissed him, on his lips and his face and his head. She licked him, sucked softly at his ears, nuzzled her nose against him, all of which caused him to groan low in his throat.

"Yes," he whispered. "Yes, Shaeeah. Yes." She ran her teeth along his neck, softly as he had done tchun, and he whimpered. She didn't need to reach down to know he was hard. The tension of his body was enough notice.

She wanted to touch him, to feel his skin, so she ran her fingers under his shirt. She knew he had a beautiful chest; pale skin slowly turning tan, small dark nipples, a sprinkling of hair in the valley of his pectorals and the wavy hills of his abdominals, the sharp ridges of his hips. She saw them often during the games of chase. He was more beautiful than his brothers. Shaeeah found his nipples with her fingers. Experimentally, she rubbed them as she had often rubbed her own, softly pinched them. He quivered. She straddled him for more leverage to experiment and suddenly forgot his nipples as his hardness pressed between her legs. She froze.

He froze also and then leaned forward and gently kissed her. He picked her up and moved her off of him with trembling hands. He knew, she knew, it wasn't the right time. Not if they had both frozen like that. She almost cried in frustration and set her forehead against his chest, shaking. His hand came to her back to offer comfort. By chance, he caressed her lekku as well. She remembered the feel of his lips on tchun and tchin. She put her hand on his hardness, outside of the material of his clothing.

"Quad," she asked. "May I?"

"Anything." He said with a smile, his face close to hers.

She smiled at him, gave him a soft kiss which deepened and re-ignited the lost moment she had straddled him.

She pushed him gently in the chest and he lay back, his fingers stroking her lekku. Her fingers reached into his pants. She loved the look of him by now. That part of him was like some small animal, begging for her attention. Her hands played with him, coaxing him further out of his pants.

He sucked tchun and tchin together, his teeth lightly scratching their surface. She moaned, her eyes closed. She felt her body stretch, relax, prepare. _Prepare for what_ , skittered across her mind. Shaeeah bent down, cradled him in her hands and put her mouth on Quad.

"Shaeeah,…" he gasped in shock, but little brother blossomed in her hands; growing, thickening, small drops of liquid coming from its opening. Shaeeah licked harder, played her tongue against his opening as though it were a set of small puckered lips, tasting the saltiness of him. She gave small sucks as he had done her lekku.

"No teeth," he gasped, realizing she was adapting what he had done to her lekku for his pleasure. She nodded, absently, her hands cradling, holding, stroking.

"Shaeeah, that's so good." His voice moaned his pleasure. She felt his fingers trembling on her lekku, trembling as they stroked her skin. His hands grasp her lekku, trying to hold steady against his trembling.

His hips moved. "Please, Shaeeah," his begging gave way to an inarticulate cry. Shaeeah could feel the rushing in her hand gripping him at his root. Her hand held him while her mouth warmed him.

His hand came down, touched her face and slowly drew her up to his face. He nuzzled her, softly licking her face, kissing her gently, his tongue sliding between her lips to play with her mouth.

He tucked little brother back into his pants when he caught his breath. He held her close to his body. He put his arms around her and pulled her deep into his chest. "Tell me about Riuren's Rage."

It would have been much easier if he hadn't been kissing her lekku, setting his teeth softly to tchin, softly sucking tchun.

_Quad made up his mind. He knew what he wanted. Now there was only a future to be planned_


	9. Separations

**Separations**

They had all cleared their event debriefs; Cody and Rex listening to their stories, their horrors. They found more evidence of how the Kaminoans treated the fallen, even how most Jedi tended to treat them as 'replaceable'. They listen and asked if someone had seen them for individuals and were rewarded with stories of love, friendship, a glance, a nod. They heard how the horrors they had inflicted on other people were perceived as worse than the horrors inflicted on themselves.

Some few brothers mentioned future plans. Kix, with a delighted grin, told them he would be staying with Saria and Jester, learning from her and expanding on his combat medic background. Riposte had informed them of his desire to find his 'family'. They'd been refugees and he would have to track them down to their new home and there was no guessing where that might be. He had shyly smiled and told them Kix planned on giving him half his share of money when he left.

All the men, except Dare, Kaver, and Kayl had cleared medical. Kaver and Kayl expected to be cleared within two weeks as their minor fractures healed. In two weeks, Saria would remove Dare's wires and replace them with flexbands. For Dare that couldn't happen soon enough. He'd already lost weight, felt ignored because he couldn't speak, and often simply sat next to one of the Zeltron women to keep from feeling depressed. Just being able to take tiny bites or whisper his thoughts seemed like paradise to him.

Riposte was cleared and joked that he had his own natural camouflage – the healing bruises in mottled shadow and sunlight were a near perfect pattern for Saleucami's forest. Sketch had been given a provisional medical and was working with Saria, both in physical therapy for his ankle as well as future planning for the knee.

The psychological debrief was the wall for many of the men. "What did you expect?" had said Cody and Rex each time someone complained. Then they listened, truly listened to the complaints. That seemed to be sufficient for most of the men.

Shy hadn't tried yet. No one was hopeful about Shy except Shy. Anything new, from boiled eggs to a different game in the afternoon, confused him, froze him, and made him react like a trooper even to the point, once, of attacking Backup.

Riven hadn't been hopeful but he had tried. Afterwards, Sula asked him to see her simply to talk. He hadn't wanted to talk to anyone, but Sula gently pointed out that he probably wouldn't pass his psyc unless he did. He nodded, frowning. 'A civilian, a woman like you, shouldn't hear it.' She had replied. 'A human, a man like yourself, shouldn't have gone through what you did'.

Edge decided he wouldn't even bother clearing. "I like Saleucami." He had said to Saria with one of his very rare grins, "even if you won't marry me."

Djinn hadn't cleared but he hadn't tried. Like a few other men, he was still working on possibilities. There was a big galaxy out there and his choices seemed overwhelming without some kind of direction.

Jesse hadn't cleared, though he had tried. He had expected that, nodded and asked 'What do I need to do?'. 'Forgive yourself', had been the gentle answer from Saoha. Jesse couldn't do that. But he'd come back every few days to talk with Saria or Sula. He had time. Nights he dreamed of a dark-haired woman with blue eyes. Sometimes Elarlu was angry, but mostly she wept. Jesse knew he'd be able to clear his psyc when he discovered why she was crying.

Backup didn't pass and Checkout had; widening the gulf between the two former friends and partners.

Cut glanced at Suu, a wide smile on his face, as he drove into Issuya in the old speeder, easily maneuvering towards Saria's apartment and into the near-empty adjacent storage building.

Issuya was small, perhaps a township of a thousand people, though during planting and harvesting season, there could be upwards of five times that. Saria's apartment of golden yellow stone was shadowed by the vines of the patio and only a block away from the three story medical unit housing her office. That was one of the few multi-story buildings in Issuya besides the transport terminal and citadel of government offices and services.

Cut opened the door to the apartment and gave a quick, searching glance around. He smiled and held the door open for Suu.

"I don't think we should tell Saria that her plants thrive better when she's not around." Cut smiled pointing at several plants in multi-colored planers and Suu laughed.

"I think she knows."

He hadn't even closed the door before hugging her close to him.

Cut loved Suu. He spent two days loving her, courting her, pampering her. He spent two days, talking with her, being with her, dancing with her, simply watching her as she read or bathed or tended Saria's plants. He spent two days touching her, hugging her, holding her, tasting her. He also spent two days following her around and carrying the packages that were clothes and supplies for the departing men. They returned to the farm in the early morning of the day Ahsoka and Saoha were to take five men to Dantooine.

Checkout had met them as the speeder pulled in next to the house. "Please Suu. Please, I'm begging you." He fell to his knees. "I will never pull a joke on anyone again if you'll just help me with breakfast. There's no bread, twelve fresh eggs and only Jek's help. When I ask for instructions Shy shrugs, Numa has vanished with the scouts, and Shaeeah simply looks at me." He looked at the ground. "And Backup isn't helping at all. I'll do if you'll just … direct. Please."

Cut looked at Checkout with a hard face, then at Suu who smiled back at him. "I suppose," she said. "I could direct."

"Thank you, thank you." Checkout pushed himself off the ground. "I've got a decently steady fire going and Crux is watching that. Jek has gotten the juice together and has suggested savory rice and he's started cooking the rice. But he doesn't know the recipe."

"You don't lift a finger, Suu." Cut warned both Suu and Checkout mildly. She kissed him on the cheek and he smiled as he turned toward the speeder to load up with packages. "I'll let Col and the others know we've got some items for them."

"Checkout, go tell Jek to turn the heat off the rice, he always burns it." Suu told him and he ran to the back yard, going around the house. She turned to Cut. "Please bring everything to the back. I really want to see their faces as they pick out what they want."

She went through the house where Sketch was gently massaging his leg. He stood on his crutches and gave her a big hug. "Good to see you, Suu." He grinned. "Is breakfast going to be palatable today?"

"Possibly. I'm only a consultant."

"Good enough for me. I've been cooking my own and Shaeeah's been very helpful in teaching me." Sketch glanced to the kitchen. "But something's always lacking." They moved to the back door.  Crux had a steady fire going. Checkout was removing a large container, presumable the rice, from the edge of the steel plate and several men were loitering, their plates in their hands. They cheered her, the few men in the yard, they actually cheered and Suu blushed, her pink cheeks turning dark red.

Breakfast was decent, better than it had been for the last two days. The rice, a little burnt on one side and a bit crunchy on the other, served as the base for a custardy casserole sprinkled with cut bits of leftover steak and onions.

The five travelers, lead by Col, rummaged through the pile of things Suu had purchased, many from the second-hand store. The work boots were new and brought the biggest appreciation and grateful hugs from the men. Suu had remembered duffles and packs for the men, and they packed their new belongings carefully. Shaeeah, and Numa had brought out the little books to hand out to the men. Suu knew they had spent most of the last few days making the books; sewing the thick art paper together. Jester had drawn a portrait of each man and a picture of the farmhouse on the covers. Suu had copied a recipe – different for each man – on one of the pages. Col and Dub had tears in their eyes at the gift. Gekko and Leven were joyous, they'd never even received gifts before. Pax gave a smile, his first since Saria had returned to Jester, and thanked them with a hug.

Rex and Cody took the five men for a departure briefing. She knew they were being briefed on much of what Rex and Cody had learned from all the men. When they returned, their faces were hard and stern. But only for a short time, only until Barin or Keeli grabbed them for a hug and, in Keeli's case, a baby-wet kiss.

It was over too soon. Suu watched as the five passengers made their good-bys with the other men, with everyone. She gave them hugs and soft kisses on the cheeks, reminding them this was home if they ever decided, ever needed, to come back; knowing she would probably never see them again.

* * *

**Dantooine**

It was an uneventful flight. As the ship got closer to Dantooine, Col became more nervous, mingled hope and terror and a deep aching need deep inside him that left his hands shaking. He'd snapped at Ahsoka then swiftly apologized. He hadn't apologized to Dub, giving him a black eye instead. Dub apologized.

Col had directed them to land at the only spaceport on the planet; they were immigrants, he explained. "Legal immigrants."

Their immigration fee had been fairly steep, 250 credits per man but Col hadn't had to pay. He'd hesitantly given his name as Col of Clan Gwydr and the records declared him was a clan member. Col had almost dropped to his knees in happy shock to discover that someone, maybe his Ehveen, considered him family. Saoha had put her hand to his shoulder. Stuttering, he asked which grounds his clan was occupying this year.

"High Keep," replied the immigration officer, pointing out the eastern edge of a mountain range on the wall display. "Eager to get home?" He flashed a smile at Col.

"More than you know. I should have a child by now." Col smiled.

The officer slapped him on the shoulders. "Congratulations." He laughed. "Next time, don't spend so much time away."

"I hope I never have to leave again." Col replied with heartfelt honesty.

The officer waved him through and turned to the other men. "Brothers, eh?" he questioned with a knowing grin.

They were nervous, their fingers tight on the straps of their packs. They were clones created to fulfil a contract. They were deserters from the military, escapees from prison, and this was their first bureaucratic encounter since that escape. They' weren't sure if they'd be allowed on planet or not; weren't sure they wouldn't be hauled away and returned to the Imperials. They'd made a brother's pact to make sure none of them survived that happening.

Dub was first in line.

"Identification." Requested the officer holding his hand out and viewing his blackened eyes with suspicion. Dub licked his lips.

"None, sir." He answered softly. The officer pulled out a hand scanner.

"Palm down please. Keep it down until I say." Dub did as directed.

"Name?" questioned the officer.

"Dub Tano Lawquane." He'd asked Cut and Suu if he could take their name. He'd asked Ahsoka and Aureki and Rex and Echo. He'd even asked Shaeeah and Jek and Barin. Barin had been the hardest to convince, but had finally agreed for a ride on Dub's shoulders. Dub was proud of his new name.

"Are you wanted by any planet in the Outer Rim? Or any planet signatory to the Treaty of Neutral Space?"

Dub frowned. He wasn't exactly wanted by a planet; more like an entire sector. Certainly, nothing in the Outer Rim. "No, sir. Not that I'm aware of."

"Good enough." Slowly Dub pulled his hand away from the scanner. The customs official was a lot faster and had pulled up a screen on his datapad, electronically forwarded it to the scanner, checked it and had it back in front of Dub before his hand was away from the counter. "Fingerprint here, secondary thumb print here." the officer pointed to two squares on the scanner. "We will be running your identification through local," he glanced up and gave Dub and the other men a small, knowing smile, "and only local systems. Your print will also be used when you register for your final immigration status. If you cause trouble, any local law official or clan leader can have your prints reported. Cause enough trouble and we'll deport you. Any questions?"

Dub nodded as he listened. "What kind of things can get me into trouble?"

"The usual type of stuff," and Dub nearly panicked, not knowing what the 'usual' was, but the officer continued speaking. "Fighting," he glared at Dub's eye and Dub swallowed nervously. "Theft, wanton destruction of property, arson, drunk and disorderly, assault, rape, murder."

"No, sir." Dub's voice was sure and the officer glanced up at the harder tone. "You won't have any of those problems with me or my brothers, sir."

"Good, good." The immigration officer eyed Dub thoughtfully.

"You'll be required to donate 150 hours of your first year to community work, signed off either by your employer or clan leader. At the end of your second year, you'll go to your regional office and register for final planetary citizenship." He heard a sharp intake of breath from one of the men. "But only if you have a clan sponsor of chirgyo rank or higher. At the end of your third year if you haven't registered we come out, get you, hand you back about 100 to 150 of your credits and kick you off-planet on the next available ship." He looked at Dub then at the rest of the men with identical facial features. He suddenly lost his easy grin. "I don't think you want that."

"No, sir," whispered Leven, next in line after Dub.

As they were processed, the officer handed each brother a blue disk. "Keep these on you at all times. A neck duraflex is best." He looked the men over, carefully. They looked like a tough, rugged, mean gang of men; men capable of almost anything. But their attitude was respectful, their words soft and they treated the ship's crew with deference. That, the officer had decided, was amazing.

He shook his head, then turned to Ahsoka and Saoha with a soft grin. "You will have two days to confirm delivery; our customs people are pretty quick, especially for medicals like your manifest declares. After that, you have three days before you are required to show paperwork of immigration, departure itinerary, or continuing business before we request you depart." He glanced at them with a smile. "Departure itinerary can be for up to 25 days away, continuing business merely requires a clan leader contact us. Neither is difficult. Planetary docking fees for the ship begin to rise on the fifth day so be careful." He handed the data pad for their palm and Saoha signed for entry and manifest. "Will you be needing cargo haulers?"

"No," said Saoha. "The cargo is not heavy. We will manage." She smiled at the man who blushed, but smiled back.

"How do we register for low-level flying?" asked Ahsoka. "We'd like to transport our passengers directly to their destination after off-loading the cargo."

"Already done," said the officer, stamping and entering data onto his pad. He handed Saoha, as registered owner, a red chip. "Flight pattern to High Keep is on here for you. Pre-programmed for auto-pilot if you wish, and auto-pilot is suggested around mountainous areas like High Keep; most pilots are unused to the air turbulence patterns around mountains. We don't send anyone to rescue you unless the auto-pilot was flying or your insurance is pre-paid. If you don't off-load within two days, come get another one – weather patterns change rapidly during seasonal shift and we're coming into autumn."

"Thank you, you've been wonderfully helpful," Saoha beamed at him. "Is there anything else we should know?"

"Other than where to find me?" he laughed, "Not much else."

"That's good flirting," whispered one of the brothers to another.

Customs was there later that day and the cargo was off-loaded within hours of their arrival to Dantooine.

They landed at High Keep, Ahsoka and Col venturing out to find the clan leader or someone else with authority to welcome the guests. He didn't want to overwhelm Ehveen's people with too many clone brothers and not enough explanation without local authority around. Col looked around noticing the odor of bantha in the air. He laughed as Ahsoka's nose twitched.

"Takes a moment's getting used to, but this is the gathering corral and a little more pungent than anywhere else. Mostly, the bantha and nerf roam the pastureland." His eyes were scanning the gathering people, none from Ehveen's family though he recognized a few and absently smiled. They smiled back, but were waiting also.

"Heyo Col," it was a loud male voice and Ahsoka noticed the expression on Col's face where hope and fear warred. It was a tall man, older but full of authority. Unexpectedly clean-cut and slender for a man who dealt with the shaggy bantha and nerf, a model against the sterotypical image of a nerf herder. His eyes were blue and his hair, where it wasn't grey, was dark brown.

Col turned, Ahsoka with him. The man's eyes narrowed at the sight of her, but still he greeted Col with a hug. Col seemed not to be able to let go, his finger gripping the man's tunic.

"Adwr, Adwr. I have missed you, have missed clan, have missed Ehveen." Col suddenly was sobbing into the other man's shoulder. The other man patted Col on the back, hugging him as he realized the intensity of Col's emotion. Ahsoka also put her hand to his back with a smile at the man.

"Heyo, Col, heyo." He said softly as he rubbed Col's back, hugging him deeply, maintaining the hug as he realized Col was close to breaking even though his tears were of happiness. "Col Wanderer. Will you have adventures for the fire?" He glanced toward Ahsoka, looked her up and down. "Do you bring a wife?"

That cut into Col's near-hyseria. Col choked, laughed nervously and pulled away from the older man, his hands still clasping Adwr's elbow, his face red. "No, Adwr, this is the pilot. Ahsoka Tano who is also my brothers' wife. Ahsoka, this is Adwr, the Hand of Law. And Ehveen's father." Ahsoka smiled and held her hands palm up, in universal peace. Adwr reached out his hand for hers and she clasped it in her own.

"I have come back, Adwr." Col licked his lips. "I never want to leave Dantooine again. No adventures, but I do bring some brothers who would be interested in working hard and in joining the clan. None are married."

"Brothers? I thought you were…" Adwr's brows furrowed and then cleared. He glanced at the ship, taking in its size. "Ahh, brothers. That, of course, is up for discussion and the immigration laws, but I'll tell you, Col. We've had some good years. We've had to hire herders to assist with the herds. I think some new clan members would be welcome. How many?"

"Four." Col replied. "Maybe more later."

"Bring them," called Adwr, as he saw someone gesturing for him and moved in that direction. "Bring them."

Col trotted after Adwr, leaving Ahsoka to call the others out of the ship. Dub and Gekko ran to catch up with Col, while Pax and Leven stayed near Ahsoka and Saoha as they all sat on the gangway of the ship or stood beside it, subject to the curious glances and shy smiles around them. A few people came up to speak with them, curious about the ship and the strangers.

Adwr found the problem quick enough. There was some trouble at the milking corral. One of the big cows didn't want to go into her chute.

"Col, you take flank. Grab one of the childrens' prods. You remember her points?" Adwr shouted. "I'll take her head."

"Of course, you taught me too well." Col laughed then his voice caught. "I spent years dreaming of bantha, Adwr." Col had grabbed one of the sturdy sticks from one of the younger girls with a smile. The bantha were usually gentle creatures, but a bad experience could turn the animal stubborn. Not vicious, merely stubborn enough to required more pushing. He'd been injured when he'd been here before, but even then he'd been stronger than the children responsible for herding the big animals to the chutes. "This requires a little muscle," he told her with a smile then turned back to his brothers. "Dub, Gekko, stay out of the way. Behind the children, they know the animal."

He laughed, happy to once more be doing hard work; work with value, constructive work rather than the wanton destruction of war. By the time they got the stubborn cow into her chute, Col was feeling at home, wondering why he'd ever returned to the army.

Adwr must have noticed something in his expression or in his voice as they both leaned against the milking chute, a sheen of sweat on their faces. "Heyo, Col," he said softly, patting the now-placid cow. "Welcome home."

Dub was looking at the animal, while Gekko was asking questions of the youngling boy starting to milk her.

"Home," whispered Col with a smile. "Where Ehveen?" he asked. "Where's my child?"

"Ehveen is working on the threads; as for your son," Adwr gazed over the fields where the children were herding bantha with the prod sticks.

Col's breath caught in his throat and he barely felt Dub's hand on his shoulder. _His son_.

"Colehn!" Adwr's voice bellowed. A dark-haired boy glanced toward the little circle of men and came running. He was lean, his feet quick and in only a few moments Col's son stood before him; shaggy-haired, brown-eyed, gazing fearlessly at the men with curiosity. Col quivered, wanting to grab the child in a hug. He held himself back; he was a stranger to his own son.

"Colehn, this is your father, Col Wanderer. Col, your son, Colehn."

"I am Ehveen's son." The boy stated, he didn't look at Col angrily, merely as though he expected his objection to be noted. Col nodded.

"You are Ehveen's son. If I'd been here, you'd have been my son as well. I was not here and nothing can make up for that." Col sighed. "I am sorry. More sorry than I can express."

The boy's face twisted in thought until Col gave a soft laugh. "I can see you're thinking very deep thoughts. I plan to stay, so you don't have to hurry them. When you know what to say, I will be here."

Colehn's face cleared a bit. He nodded. "I'll come talk with you." Colehn looked at Dub, standing behind Col. "Are you twins?" Dub laughed and Col chuckled,

Gekko stuck his face out from the other side of the bantha to smile at the boy with a wide grin. "Not even triplets."

"No, there are more of my brothers. If you want to see them, go to the ship," Col pointed out the flyer half-hid by calving huts. Softly, he touched his son on the shoulder. "Tell them you are Col's son and they will probably show you the inside."

Colehn smiled then ran, as though there were no other way to approach life. Col watched him.

Adwr smiled. Col Wanderer had, indeed, come home.

Col gave a deep sigh. "I've traveled a long way, Adwr and I know, now, that family is wealth." He turned to the older man. "Where are the threading houses? I'd like to see Ehveen."

"They are upwind of the calving huts, upwind of camp." Adwr smiled, "Two years ago the women decided they prefer to be upwind of everything."

Col laughed. "Ahsoka, I'm sure, would agree with them." Col turned to go, but Adwr caught his arm.

"Ehveen is pregnant. She is married to a man of Dsayn clan just now. I remember that you are a stranger in so many ways, Col, and I do not know how you will react."

Adwr caught the sadness in Col's voice, saw the steadying hand of his brother on his shoulder.

"Not badly, Adwr. I love her too much and I've been gone for a long time. As sad as I am for myself, I'm glad that she continued her life."

Adwr nodded. Col Wanderer had returned to Dantooine an older, wiser man.

Col moved up to the thread houses, Gekko remained at the milking chutes, he'd asked the youngling to teach him to milk the bantha. Dub and Adwr walked with Col part way, turning toward the ship where Adwr was prepared to welcome their guests, to meet Col's brothers.

He would push for Col's brothers to be welcomed as clan members. Col had been a hard worker the time he was here even as bone-broken as he'd been. Family was always preferred over the itinerant herders who were not always trustworthy. Dub's attitude to Col spoke of strong bonds. Gekko, also, had been respectful of his brother and, already, had asked to learn, already was working. The muscles of all the men spoke of activity, strength and endurance. Adwr smiled as he remember Col telling him he'd never met a woman before Ehveen. Even with the addition of four men, there'd still be slightly more women in the camp and Col had said his brothers were unmarried. The women would be happier, they'd complained about a scarcity of marriageable men in the clan and some had said they'd be looking at other clans at the Culling Fair. Adwr chuckled as he glanced at the man beside him. They wouldn't be looking now, except at the new men working for their own clan.

"Col mentioned his brothers are unmarried, that there are four of you with him now and perhaps others later. How many others, may I ask?"

Dub blushed. "No more than four or five at the very most. They'd also be unmarried." Dub chewed his lip for a second. "I think we'd all like to get married and have family." He looked at the older man. "I know I would. I don't know if Col told you, but we don't have long lives." He saw Adwr nod.

"He told me that you were made-men. That you had," his lips twisted in disgust at the thought, "an expiration. I cannot speak for everyone, but I consider Col family. I consider his brothers the same." Adwr nodded to himself. He had just accepted them into the clan as family. It was right to do so.

Dub faltered in his walk, then stopped. "Thank you," he said, his voice soft and husky, then he continued walking and Adwr knew he could say no more.

Col watched the women as they carded and spun the wooly undercoat of the bantha into thread. It was a warm day and the women were, for the most part, outside the house with their equipment. A windbreak of canvas had been set up and also provided shade. Col merely watched them for a moment, the everyday activities of the clan. He brushed away a tear. He could see Ehveen. She was pregnant, as round as Sula had been when they had all escaped from prison. Any day now. What Col would have done to be with her, as he had seen Fives go in with Sula. He shook his head softly. He had no right. He had left her.

She was laughing, playing the drum to keep the rhythm of the spinners up, her eyes sparkling. She must have felt his eyes on her, because she turned and saw him. Clumsily, she tried to rise from her seat but her balance was off. Col moved quickly and was there before she tried again. He held his hand out to her for support.

"Col," Her voice, her eyes, were delighted to see him and his heart warmed at her pleasure. She didn't hate him for leaving her, she didn't hate him for being gone so long. Col had been afraid she might.

"I'm back, Ehveen. I won't go away again." He gave her his promise.

"And you return when I am as large and graceful as a bantha on the ice," she laughed, her hands touching his face. It seemed too intimate a touch for a married woman to an unmarried man and he took her hands in his.

"I saw the woman from the ship. Are you married to her?" She asked, an odd note in her voice.

"No, Ehveen, she is the wife of my brother. But Adwr told me you were married." Col sighed. "That's all right, Ehveen. Just being around you and my son is enough." Col smiled at her. It was. He looked outward where some bantha cows were being guided into the milking corral by several children, his own son among them. "I will work for the clan; perhaps the clan father will find my brothers worthy as well." He smiled, "Perhaps your sisters will find them handsome? For me," he bent his head to her hands, touching her fingertips with his lips. "I am yours and will remain so until death claims me."

She laughed softly, releasing her hands from his grasp to put them around his face then around his neck. She wished she was slender enough to hug him. He seemed so much older, so much sadder. She longed to bring smiles to his face and laughter to his voice.

"Col, you only need wait a short time. My marriage is a year marriage. Things have gone well this last decade and the clan wanted more children. Since your departure, I have entered into two year-marriages and given the clan one child." She blushed. "You showed me that I enjoyed pregnancy. This will be my second year-marriage child."

Col froze, his heart caught between now and forever. "Ehveen, I don't recall we ever discussed year-marriages but I'm hopeful when I hear the word 'year'.

She nodded. "At the Culling Fair I will no longer be married." She blushed. "Unless you…"

He grabbed her in his arms and she squealed in surprise then giggled like the younger Ehveen he'd known.

"Yes, yes," he shouted to the amusement of the women. "Yes, I will do whatever I need to do…" he put her back on the ground, gently but held her to her feet. "… whatever I must." His golden eyes sparkled with tears. "Because I love you, Ehveen."

* * *

**Issuya**

Cut and Suu returned to Saria's apartment in Issuya at the end of the day. They were quieter, almost somber, as Cut opened the door and checked the interior. Without speaking they set their packs in the bedroom and moved around the apartment. Cut went into the kitchen while Suu stepped out on the patio for a few moments before coming inside to sit and watch Cut cook.

"I think that's what it will feel like." Suu's voice was contemplative as she sat at the table.

"What, Suu?" his asked while his hands were busy with cutting vegetables and tossing them into the hot pan.

"When Shaeeah and Jek grow up, make their own families and leave." Her fingers traced random patterns on the table.

"Maybe a little. But won't we be proud of our children? They're growing into fine adults." He looked at her, noticed her sadness and rubbed her neck with a momentarily free hand. "That's still a couple of years in the future; even more for Keeli and the little one we're trying for now." He turned back to the sizzling pan.

Cut set the plates of vegetables with some bread on the table but she only picked at her food. He knew she was thinking of his age; that by the time she was sixty, he'd be long dead in his grave. That he might not be around to see this child they were trying for grow up. He came around her and put his hands on her shoulders; laying his head on her shoulder, kissing her neck with tender care.

"Don't, my love." He held his arms around her and spoke softly in her ear. "Don't think about the years I'll be gone, think about the years I'll be here with you. Good years, Suu. Good years," he promised.

But salty tears streamed down her cheeks as she turned her face to kiss him.

The next morning Cut went to see Chios at the warehouse and invited him and Elis to dinner. Suu made chocolate pudding pie, a favorite of both Chios and Cut, and fresh bread. She made a cold fruit soup from muja and goldenfruit while Cut marinated strips of bantha and nerf steak for the grill then cut vegetables for the skewers. They showered together, giggling as they washed each other. Suu dressed in a long, loose tunic that had been a gift from Cut while he put on his good pants and a white shirt which emphasized the breadth of his shoulders.

Suu smiled and kissed her handsome husband even as the bell chimed their visitors.

"Do you think they'll go away if we ignore them?" whispered Suu, her lips touching his.

"No," he grinned with sparkling eyes. "Elis hasn't spoken with you in ages. I'm sure she has gossip you simply must share." Suu giggled and rolled her eyes. Elis was well-known for her proclivity to talk; especially about people. It some ways, Cut considered her his most valuable intel source, Suu considered her an entertaining friend.

Neither he nor Suu were far from wrong. The older, Wroonian couple were delighted to see them away from business. At their questions, Elis spent most of dinner re-acquainting them with everything that had happened in Issuya for the past few weeks. She paused only at the sight of the pie. She, also, enjoyed Suu's baking. Cut took the opportunity to turn to Chios.

"Do you have a position at the warehouse for me, Chios?" asked Cut as they relaxed, moving toward the large couch and comfortable chairs in the living room. Suu served the pie, bringing them their plates.

"Ah Cut, you have a good income at the farm. My best harvesters." Chios glanced longingly at the pie, obviously considering his slice too small.

Cut grinned, glanced at Suu and took her hand. "Just a temporary job, day laborer, maybe a half year, Chios. A little extra cash is always welcome for new children." Suu blushed at his words.

"Are you expecting?" Elis was always interested in babies and could talk for hours about babies; particularly her own seven grandchildren and the expected first great-grandbaby. Suu had laughed while Cut silently marveled at the idea of generations, of Chios seeing a great-grandchild. He didn't think he would ever see a great-grandchild, but maybe he'd see a grandchild; a beautiful little child of Shaeeah's or Jeks, maybe even a human child of Keeli's. He shook his head at himself. Probably not Keeli's.

"Not yet, but Cut is doing his best to make it happen." This time Cut had blushed at her words. Chios' response to that started low; a chuckle like the roll of distant thunder, then bursting forth into loud, pleased laughter as Chios clapped Cut on the shoulder, several times. Cut grinned in happy embarrassment. Chios had introduced him to Suu.

Elis glanced at the men, subduing her husband with a glance, though his chest still rumbled with satisfaction. "Are you sure this is a good idea?" She asked, turning toward Suu, lowering her voice. Men often didn't like to hear about such things.

"Both Chymdura and Saria agree it was the work. That was a hard season, as you recall. We shouldn't have that problem this year." Suu took a sip of the wine Chios and Elis had brought. "Shaeeah and Jek are older, their cousin Numa is visiting indefinitely, from Ryloth - you've heard how things are there. She's a conscientious and serious girl. Jester is well-versed in all aspects of the farm to help me and Saria has said she will move back in with Jester." Suu leaned a little forward toward Elis also turning toward the other woman. Both men recognized the move and glanced at each other. Their intrusion on the conversation was obviously unwanted.

"Oh, that is so good. She has been miserable in town. So lonely."

Suu continued. "We anticipate no problems, but we'll be ready for them." She smiled. "All of them. Saria has given me permission to tell you that she and Jester will also be having a baby themselves in about five or six months."

Elis clapped her hand. "No wonder she was so miserable. And that boy…" She shook her head, "Needs to take care of her."

"He will, Elis. He certainly will now," affirmed Suu.

Chios turned to Cut and gestured him to the table for talk and another piece of pie.

"Of course I can always use a good worker, Cut." Chios cut himself another piece of pie, slightly larger than his first. "You work hard and good. For that short season I had you, you were one of my best laborers. If Suu hadn't taken you on, I was considering hiring you for post-seasonal work." He took a bite of the pie, his eyes closed as the smoothness of the chocolate slid over his tongue. "I have a position, worker foreman for one of the loading crews. I think you would do very well. Only for three months though, then laborer." Chios suddenly glanced away, toward Elis and Suu deep in conversation, then back to Cut and down, slightly nervous. "Would you be willing to stay nights or work late to enter the numbers?"

"Not every night. Not all night. I'm older now and more appreciative of a good bed." He chuckled and Chios had laughed as well.

"With age comes wisdom." He quoted part of a Wroonian proverb. Cut knew the second part of the proverb; _with wisdom comes regret_. Cut knew there would always be regrets but you could only do what you thought was right at the time.

Cut continued. "But since Suu will be working the farm, there's no reason I can't stay late to bring the books up to date."

"So good, so good. Come see me tomorrow and I'll show you the books and introduce you to your men."

Cut nodded. _And tell me that problem you're not mentioning now._

* * *

"It's a drifter, Cut." Chios shook his head as he closed the door to his office. He'd already introduced Cut to his crew. "I don't know how he gets in, but every night he takes the food. I have noticed he pays for it in labor. My office has never been so clean though he is considerate not to touch too much of the mess on my desk."

"He's probably afraid of an avalanche," murmured Cut as he glanced at Chios' desk, burdened with flimsis and scraps of information, samples of grain, pieces of wire, tally books, and plastic clips with numbers written on them. Chios sighed and nodded his head dolefully in agreement.

"What do you want done, Chios?" asked Cut as he leaned against the desk opposite of Chios.

"What do you mean?"

Cut sighed. "If you wanted to get rid of the drifter, you'd just stop keeping food here. Or you'd hire a night watchman."

"I did hire the watchman. Three nights running, the watchman saw nothing yet the food was gone and the tool room had been cleaned, some tools oiled, others sharpened." Chios remarked _sotto voce_. "I think he sleeps."

"And what about taking the food home so there's no reason for him to break in?" Cut asked, slightly amused at Chios' reluctance to say that he wanted to hire the drifter who worked for his food.

Chios made small movements with his hands and blushed a dark navy. "Not always was I prosperous, Cut. I understand hunger, deprivation. Times are hard. Perhaps it is someone with a child or someone else needing assistance. Elis says I should eat less, so I do." Chios chuckled at his joke then glanced around making sure no one was within hearing. "I left a note with the food the fifth night. 'See me for a job'. This drifter works hard for little food. I think he would work very hard for credits. Yet, he does not come in the day. Is he a criminal? The petty cash was not touched." Chios shook his head, his expression thoughtful. "It is high summer, but the nights still get colder here than in the lowlands and the rainy season is coming. With that come the migrants for spring planting and always the flu. Since the Empire, we make good money on the grain, but there is less safety." He shook his head, then his entire body as he raised his hands. "Ahhh, I am an old man and should worry when I shall have great-grandchildren, not about some drifter. I leave the problem in your hands, Cut."

"I'll do what I can, Chios." Cut smiled, remembering when Chios had hired him on the basis of a growling stomach as he stood in the line of hopeful applicants.

* * *

His hair was light brown, almost blonde; another genetic anomaly like Rex and Edge, though his eyes were the golden brown of, statistically, all clones. He had a sharply canted cheek and a twisted, broken nose; both from some fight or another. The beard and mustache helped disguise the line of his jaw and the shape of his lips. But the shape of his eyes, his ears, even his hands matched Cut's and every brother back at the farm.

"Hello brother." Cut's voice was soft, but still the drifter jerked to one side of the doorway, pulling the blaster out in one smooth battle-drilled response. Cut had expected this and made no move though his body screamed at him to attack, move, defend, do something. He found it interesting that his battle responses were as strong now as they'd been almost a decade ago. He smiled and nodded his head, keeping his voice calm and level. "It's good to see another clone. I'm Cut. I've taken the last name Lawquane." He gestured slowly at the chair by one of the two desks. "I'd like to sit and talk. Is that good with you?"

The drifter nodded and relaxed a bit, but only a bit. He came into the room, inspected it with a sweep of his eyes, and leaned against one wall that allowed him to see the entryway as well as any movement of Cut's. Cut sat in the chair, a more vulnerable position, to show his trust.

"Are you the drifter that's been taking Chios' leftover lunch and cleaning up around here?"

The man gave another short nod. Cut leaned back in the chair, his fingers tapping on the armrests. "If you're hungry, don't let me stop you. Today, there's nerf steak with gravy over noodles, qana beans and the inevitable goldenfruit. Blue milk to drink." The drifter's face was eloquent in its hunger and Cut continued. "There are also three boiled eggs and some extra goldenfruit for you to take with you." The drifter didn't move other than take a quick glance by flicking his eyes at the conservator then back to Cut.

"It's on the other desk." Cut gestured. "It's still hot," he said softly. "My wife dropped it off for you. She was in the speeder a short time ago."

He saw the shock in the other man's face, his mouth open in a circle. "Wi ..wi. wife?"

Cut nodded. "Wife. Family. Two sons, a daughter." He'd caught something in the drifter's speech pattern; it wasn't the stutter of surprise. It was a speech impediment. Certainly not out of Kamino. It was battle damage then; a head wound. "Sit. Eat. Keep your blaster handy by all means. I've got work to do on the tally books, so my hands will be moving. But they won't go where you can't see them."

The drifter nodded as he moved to sit at the desk, swallowing convulsively as he contemplated the food. Hot food, fresh food. Not leftovers. He glanced at the man on the desk across from him, his hands already opening the books. They'd brought food _for him_. That gave him a little hope.

"And it's not poisoned." Cut added as he bent to the first book trying to decipher the handwriting. "We could have done that anytime with the food in the conservator."

The drifter nodded, believing him, knowing he'd spoken only the truth. He took his first bite of hot food in a long time and wondered if he had died; wondered if this dark little office was paradise in disguise. It tasted like it.

Cut was halfway through the second book, muttering at the nearly-illegible scribbles, when the drifter spoke again.

"G..good. Dank you." He glared at Cut, daring him to remark on his words.

"You're welcome." He leaned back. "What shall I call you?"

"Si…Sinker Wo.. wo. Wolf."

Cut remembered the name from Boil's list. Sinker had served with Jedi General Plo Koon in Wolff's Pack; the Wolfpack. Sinker Wolf. According to Boil, he'd escaped the beginning of Boil's third year as sergeant and guarding, perhaps half a year ago. He hadn't done well, not if he was a drifter with nothing more than what he carried. Still, he was alive and that counted the most.

Sinker fingered the blaster, contemplating, decided then smoothly slid it into its holster. Whatever injuries he had, they didn't affect his reflexes.

"My wife appreciates that," said Cut as he stretched back and rolled his tense shoulders. "She's very protective of me."

The drifter nodded and Cut caught the forlorn expression. Lonely. The eggs were for his breakfast, not for someone with him. Still, it was always best to check.

"Is there anyone with you?"

Sinker gave a quick shake of his head, followed by a frown then a quick smile at Cut. "W..wish." He had learned to adjust to his disability; to think of each word as a sentence, to bit the word apart from the thought. To think of what he said, the best word to convey the most information.

"Why didn't you come during the day, after you'd gotten the note?"

Again, Sinker shook his head, this time regretfully, and his face twisted as he worked his lips. "Can't r…read." Again, he worked to speak and a single word burst out, "Nonsense." He pointed to the papers on the desk, words printed on a box, the sign on the door stating 'Please knock'. Sinker waved one arm, taking in the tally books in the case. "All. Nonsense." He bit the words through his teeth. His eyes glittered with tears of frustration.

Cut held out his hand for the note and Sinker pulled out the flimsi. It was in Chios' legible, dark print. _For job, see me._

"It says that Chios wanted you to come and talk with him about a job." Cut said in the quiet.

Sinker groaned. Again he worked to release the words captured in his mind. "Thought. Maybe." Then he shook his head. "Scared. Bounty."

"Is there bounty hunter around?"

Sinker nodded and held up three fingers; flickering one up then down.

"Two bounty hunters and an opportunist?" Cut asked and Sinker grinned and nodded at the words.

"I'll want to talk about that but first, how did you escape, Sinker?"

Sinker held up two fingers, again seeming to bite off the words. "Try. Caught. B..b…bust head. B.. b..body. Later. Shiny. Take. Me. One. Night. S.. say." Sinker steeled himself for the long word, remembering to break it down into smaller parts as he thought it. "In. Teru. G..gate." Sinker shook his head and smiled with remembered wonderment. "Not. G..go port." His arms moved and he stood, wanting to explain to his brother, to truly, really explain the joy that freedom had brought. "G ..go 'way. Scape." His arms opened wide as though offering himself to everything.

Cut nodded, smiling at Sinker's exuberance. "That was Boil, Sinker."

Sinker's dark brows furrowed and again, he bit off words; each one its own sentence. "Not. Walk. Like."

"Boil was a scout. He can move into that scout walk anytime he chooses." Cut explained, tipping his chair back.

Sinker thought about that for a moment, then nodded and shrugged. He tapped himself on his chest. "Free." He stated as though that explained everything. Perhaps it did.

Cut leaned back and scratched his head. "Then what, Sinker? I was given to understand that Boil made sure you had the blaster," Cut gestured at the weapon on Sinker's hip. "And new armor. What happened?"

"Sold. Cheated. Not. Wise. Creds..." He made a graceful gesture with his fingers, as though something was flowing through his fingers. "Gone. No. Job." He tapped his head and Cut noticed the edge of a ragged scar in his hairline. "Not. Hire."

Cut understood. Avoiding Sinker's situation was a good part of what they were trying to teach the other men.  "What am I going to do with you, Sinker?"

"Job." Sinker stated firmly then added, "Can't. Write."

Cut chuckled. "Yes, no problem with a job. Laborers don't need to read or write. Or even talk if you prefer." Sinker nodded over Cut's words. "I meant tonight."

Sinker looked down at himself, then at Cut with a hopeful, wistful expression. "Clothes? Sh…shower? Bed?"

Sinker spent so long in the shower, singing wordlessly the best he could, that Suu giggled softly, hugged Cut and went to bed. Cut moved to Saria's home office and opened up the couch into a bed for Sinker, supplying clean linens, a blanket and even a pillow.

Sinker came out of the shower with a grin, a towel and nothing else. He'd kept the beard, but trimmed it. Fluffing it out with his fingers seemed to widen his face. Cut shook his head. "You've worked at it, haven't you Sinker? You look less like a brother than anyone I've seen."

Sinker grinned. "Bounty." He motioned for Cut to trim his hair, but Cut declined, telling him that Suu would do it in the morning. Then they went through the clothes. There were some of Jester's clothes in Saria's apartment that he agreed could go to his brothers and Suu had spent most of the day purchasing items at the request of some of the men. There was plenty of clothing to choose from as well as miscellaneous items such as a duffle, some grooming items. All stacked on the dining table and chairs. Most of the clothes had come from the secondhand shop, the men taking Suu's frugal advice to heart and, perhaps, not wanting to look like the civilian equivalent of a shiny.

Sinker took a sturdy duffle, two shirts, a pair of boots, and two pair of work pants. His fingers had gently touched a new package of socks and he looked at Cut questioningly. Cut nodded and Sinker grabbed those. He had grinned in glee at the fresh toothbrushes, grabbed one and returned to the shower room.

"Will. Pay. From. Job." He said when he returned licking his teeth with a big smile and tucked the toothbrush into his duffle.

"They're gifts, Sinker."

"Pay." Reiterated Sinker and Cut nodded.

"Is Saleucami where you want to stay or do you have a final destination in mind?" Cut pushed aside some clothes and sat in one of the comfortable chairs.

Sinker shrugged and his face worked at the words. "Not. Kamino." Cut could see that he thought the entire idea foolish. He was on Saleucami and he had no money. Therefore, Saleucami it was.

Cut leaned forward, his elbows on the table. "Sinker, what do you know about the _Arkayd_?"

Sinker's smile faded and he shook his head. "Heard. Accident. All. Survive. Less. One." He hit his scarred fist in his hand. "Lies. Lies." He frowned and grit his teeth in anguish, hitting his hard, calloused hand several more times. "Lies."

"Yes, Sinker," Cut's voice was gentle. "All lies. Everyone escaped."

Sinker stared at him and understood he was talking about more than the stormtroopers and support; understood he was talking about prisoners. Sinker's lips trembled. "Wh..who?"

"Twenty-four men. Sinker. Boil got them out. With help."

Sinker closed his eyes and breathed deeply. He sat at the table with a smile, his eyes glittering with tears. "Good."

Tomorrow, Sinker. I don't think you'll need to start your job tomorrow. How about you go back to the farm with my wife for a few days?

Sinker bit his lip. "Think." Cut nodded and yawned, standing.

"You can sleep in there," he gestured to the office. "You can watch vids, catch up on the news if you prefer. We'll see you in the morning."

Sinker smiled. "Dank you." He motioned at himself, his pack, the office. "For. All."

"You're welcome, Sinker. You are welcome." Cut said as he turned to the bedroom.

Cut crawled in bed with his wonderful Suu who murmured softly, curled into his arms and wasn't nearly as asleep as he thought. She smiled and murmured in his ear, "I'm officially late."

Cut grinned, kissing one tattooed lek. "Let's make sure." He moved, covering her with his body. She moved, welcoming him.

* * *

Chios and Elis are supporting OC/characters in Queen's truly excellent Homestead, which is _still_ my favorite story in FF. I really suggest you read Queen's stories.

* * *

**Isolation**

The next morning Sinker was dressed and sitting at the patio table. He'd taken another shower and his hair was still damp. He hadn't tried cooking, but had made caf for them all. Cut wandered in, wearing only his pants, yawning and stretching, as he moved to the kitchen, a shirt slung over his shoulder. He glanced at Sinker, a content relaxed expression behind his beard, and smiled.

"Eggs good for you, Sinker, or would you prefer cereal?" Cut grinned at the man who only raised one eyebrow. "Right, no preference so long as it's delicious."

Sinker laughed and nodded, coming into the kitchen both to watch Cut cook and to pour himself another caf. Suu wandered into the kitchen, gave Cut a soft kiss on the cheek and poured herself some caf. She also pulled some scissors from a drawer. "How about the patio, Sinker?" she gestured, not understanding Cut and Sinker's laughter.

Sinker nodded and moved back to one of the seats there. "Sit straight," she warned, "or I won't be responsible for how your hair turns out."

He chuckled, set the caf on the table, and sat tall and straight for her.

While Suu trimmed Sinker's hair, Cut cooked up some eggs and toast. Sinker closed his eyes, letting the scent of breakfast wash over him, feeling the touch of her gentle fingers through his hair, noticing the sweet scent of the terrace flowers. He tried to imagine this place or someplace like it for him; a sanctuary, a small piece of hope and dreams. He had relaxed and as he leaned back, just a little, to stretch his shoulders, Suu combed her fingers through his hair a final time then put her arms slowly around him in a hug.

"Welcome home, brother," came her quiet words. He was too choked with emotion to reply; his mind too whirling with images to separate out one and speak it. Instead he had patted her hands around his neck then given one hand a quick squeeze.

Cut set the plates on the table and Sinker pulled his plate close to him, his arms surrounding it, looming over it, eating quickly. It was good and it seemed as though he couldn't get enough; as though he needed to eat quickly before the dream ended and he woke, again, with a hollow belly.

"Sinker," said Suu gently reaching to barely touch his arm with her fingertips. "You don't have to surround your food with your body and you don't have to eat it before someone grabs it away from you. Please, slow down, relax and enjoy our company so we can enjoy yours."

"Habit." He bit off the word as he sat straighter and slowed his eating; although he still finished before Suu or Cut were half done. When Cut rose from his seat, asking if Sinker wanted more, Sinker had closed his eyes with a smile. "More," he said as though the word itself was sustenance.

"Will you be going to the farm with me today?" Suu had asked. Sinker shook his head.

"Start. Job. Important. Go. Farm. Cut." Sinker punctuated his words with a nod at Cut when he was saying he'd go to the farm with Cut, tapping his palm with a finger when saying the job was important. Sinker labored at the words less, Cut noticed, when he was more relaxed.

Suu nodded and continued speaking. "I do need to get an early start. I still have more things to purchase. You'll be fine without the speeder?"

Cut nodded, "It's an easy walk to work."

"Love you, then." Suu started toward the door. "Enjoy your new job, Sinker." She turned toward Cut as he came from the kitchen drying his hands on a towel.

"To work then, Sinker." But Cut was hardly ready, holding onto Suu, his forehead to hers. He gave her a kiss and touched the comm bracelet on her wrist. "Talk to you soon."

* * *

"Suu!" Her bracelet receiver toned and Cut's words came at the same time. "Suu, answer me, damn it!" Cut never swore like that and she halted on the country road.

"What's the matter, Cut?"

"Are you out of town?" There was noise, angry voices, in the background and Cut's own voice was louder for it.

"Yes, only about seven clicks from home. I've already seen some of the men and…."

"Good. There's some kind of epidemic from the spaceport and they've just quarantined Issuya. Don't go home. Go to Jester's. You might be infected, so no contact with anyone for a day, keep your distance. Check with Saria. Have Jester report to Cody and Rex. Make plans. It looks like Sinker and I won't need a ride to the farm in a four day." He gave a short laugh, his voice lowered in volume and in tone. "I love you, Suu. Everything will be all right. I just panicked a little, not knowing where you were."

"I love you, too, Cut. I'm turning around now."

"I'll talk with you tonight." The little tone told her he was no longer on the comm.

She turned the speeder around and was retracing the lane to the turnoff for Jester's house, when she saw Crux in the road. He was smiling at her, waiting for her to stop. She stopped the speeder several lengths away. As he started toward her, she held up her hand.

"Stop Crux." He did.

"What's the matter, Suu?"

"Cut just told me there is illness in Issuya and they've quarantined the town."

"Understood." Crux moved into parade rest, listening attentively.

"Since I've been shopping, I've been in contact with hundreds of people and he doesn't want me to go home in case I've been infected."

Crux nodded, saw movement from the corner of his eye and jerked his hand up in a fist by his ear. Suu turned and saw Shy, a frown on his face, but halted at Crux's signal.

"Go tell Cody and Rex at the house. Shaeeah knows where the old radio is, I'm sure there'll be something on the news." Crux made a palm, flattened it and gestured down the lane. Shy nodded, saluted, and pushed off his foot into a graceful lope toward the house.

"Can you get to Jester's before me?"

Crux smiled. "Cross-country? Easily.'

"Go tell them. Ask Jester for the camping gear ..,"

Crux shook his head. "I've heard that all the gear is being used. I'll go tell whoever is at Jesters. We'll clear out and either give you the house for your quarantine or we'll get you the tent from one of the camps."

"Anything else," he smiled and gave her the accolade, the military honorific. "Sir?"

"No." she shook her head, then turned the speeder for Jester's house.

By the time she reached Jester's house, there was no one to be seen except Crux sitting cross-legged on a pile of boards.

She pulled the speeder to the furthest end of the drive. Crux walked toward her. "Saria says two days quarantine until they find out what it is and no one closer than five meters. They're going to get the information out tonight to everyone. Half of scout's camp is out on an obstacle course. At the moment, it's mostly word of mouth and you know how that goes." He laughed and stood. "Shy and Djinn are getting you one of the tents and some supplies. They'll set it up a little north of here." He gestured. "I get the house." He grinned. "And a bed."

"Why? It's just for two days." Suu frowned.

Crux lost his grin. "Unless you get ill, Suu. That's why I'm here." He moved from the boards closer until he was five meters away from her and the car. "Shy's the messenger between us and the house. At the moment it all depends on what the illness is, but quarantine is a big deal. On the radio, there was already talk of closing down the port and that is a really big deal."

Suu's mouth was open in shock. Crux smiled. "Close the mouth dear, or you'll be chewing light bugs."

Her mouth closed as she blinked. Was that flirting or humor? Sometimes, it was hard to tell.

His face became solemn again and he continued speaking. "There are already four deaths reported and about a dozen people in ICU at various med units with symptoms of whatever it is. There was a small riot today in Issuya, at one of the markets." He looked at her curiously and she nodded.

"That's probably what had Cut in a panic, thinking I was still at the market."

"They've also closed off the work district because that is where most of the migrant workers are located."

Suu's fingers came to her lips and she nodded. Cut was there. And Sinker. Probably the noise she'd heard in the background.

Crux waited until she looked at him, then continued. "Jester has taken a walk to Ossa's compounds to let them know what Saria says; at a distance, of course. Saria has moved herself and the other women into the house and kicked out poor Fives, Kix and even Sketch. She's quarantined the women away from everyone else for a four day. Even Keeli has been relegated to scouts' camp"

"Sketch? Even Keeli?" Suu shook her head. "Again, why?"

Crux frowned and looked down at the ground. "She says many diseases have a detrimental impact on fetal development and children are a primary vector."

"Were those her exact words?" Crux nodded and Suu continued. "That means she's worried. She uses her medical training and extensive vocabulary when she's scared." Suu smiled. "If she says something and you don't understand a single word, then it might be time to panic."

Crux laughed softly then became solemn. "None of us want anything to happen to the babies, Suu. There's not a single brother who wants any one to lose a baby." His voice softened. "Especially not when they're our brothers' children. Just thinking about that makes my heart race and none of them are even _my_ children."

They saw Shy as he came up to the drive. "We've got the tent set up for you, Suu, as well as a small fire. Djinn's watching until you get there. We've brought plenty of water and some sandwiches." He smiled. "I made them for you."

Suu grinned. "Thank you, Shy."

"And, of course, boiled eggs." He raised his eyebrow at her. She laughed in response.

"I take it that people have missed my cooking? Checkout hasn't improved much even with supervision the other day?" She teased as she got out of the speeder.

"Suu," Crux sighed, standing. "We were getting ready to line up and kiss your feet, to beg you to cook for us. We were getting ready to come early and learn, really pay attention, to how to cook breakfast."

Both men walked with her, five meters away, to her new camp. She told them she had bought and brought things, but to check with Saria before they removed things from the speeder. Djinn moved away from the fire as she walked into camp. For a while, all three men sat the proper distance away and chatted with her. Then Djinn and Shy left for the meeting. Crux stayed, talking, asking questions about how people acted and reacted.

When Shy returned he confirmed that Saleucami's only spaceport had closed, the planet was now officially quarantined. They had determined the illness to be one of the shadow virus; early symptoms were a headache, chills and coughing. Contagion rate was almost one hundred percent. The fatality rate was, tentatively, about sixty five percent and usually came from respiratory failure, less often multi-organ failure.

Cody and Rex were preparing the house and camp for isolation. Jester had talked to Arybas and none of the Gran had gone to town that day. Arybas said they would close their enclave to outsiders. Jester said he would keep in touch and they would do the same. Saria had raced to her data pad to research the shadow viruses. From her memory she said most of the shadow viruses were transferred by touch and had an incubation of three days. Suu shrugged. Just an extra day. She said good evening to Crux and Shy, then moved into the tent. It was roomy, originally meant for four to six people. They'd brought her a cot, some coverings and even the pillow from her own bed. She smiled at that. Suu heard Crux and Shy outside, still talking quietly though they were both ready for sleep.

Crux sighed deeply as he leaned backed against a comfortably curved rock covered with a padded blanket. "It was like when we were troopers, Shy. Like before a battle where we knew we were outnumbered or outgunned. Grim. Like when we knew brothers would die."

Shy heard her intake of breath and knew Suu had heard them. He almost started to cry when he heard her sobs muffled into the blankets.

"I'm sorry, Suu," Crux apologized so quietly he wasn't sure she heard him.

Suu had a miserable headache in the morning though she was reasonably sure it came from crying most of the night and having no Cut next to her.

* * *

**Isolation II - Orders**

Cody was relaxed, leaning against the tree trunk, Rex beside him. "That's not going to work, Rex. You can't think of an ill person as an enemy combatant." Cody bent forward, using the stick to draw in the soil.. "You have to think of them as," he frowned. "A communication node. We have to worry about clusters, about movement. Think of the disease as a message to contain instead of a physical objective to destroy, like a droid."

"Surely, they'll hold in tight, wherever they are," objected Rex. "It's a disease, not something they can run away from. They'll stay put; take care of their ill, stay in familiar area."

"No, Rex. They won't hold tight. Civilians don't have training for something like this. Some of them might stay with their family, but some won't. They'll be scared. Some will panic, some will fall into their everyday habits. Civilians with irrational fear don't think, Rex, they react. They'll grasp at imaginary straws. They'll come from Issuya because they have no food. Food supply lines have already been cut. People will come simply because we're in the line to somewhere else or away from something else. People will come because they think we're well and they want the cure or because they think we're ill and they want to destroy us. There is no rationality in epidemics." Cody had drawn a diagram of a square surrounded by two rings. "We ring the house; outer and inner perimeter. Outer camp between Issuya and the house. Inner camp not too far from the barn and on the path to big rock. I would suggest authorizing lethal force."

Rex frowned. "That's not my call.'

Rex stood; he could never sit for very long although he could stand or pace for hours. Cody leaned, relaxed and smiling. He stood also. Suddenly, like he had changed as a small breeze swept over them, he was _Commander_ Cody.

"Captain," his voice was sharp. "What is your primary objective?"

"Protect the women and children, sir." Rex hated it, hated Cody, hated this automatic reaction, hated coming to attention at that tone. It was drilled and programed into him, it was the part of him that had followed Order 66 at the Jedi temple.

"Secondary objective, Captain." The commander's question came on the heels of Rex's words.

"Protect my men. Keep our identities hidden, Cody." Rex was no longer in automatic mode and had moved from attention to parade rest.

"Our resources?" Cody's point made, his voice was returning to its normal tone and timbre.

"We have food to keep us alive for about two months. We have a combat medic and a civilian scholarly trained nurse. We have two ARC troopers, four sergeants, two military scouts, one civilian scout."

"You count Numa as a resource?" Cody questioned and Rex remembered he'd never played scout's seek with her.

Rex nodded and continued. "One civilian Zeltron empath, one civilian Twi'lek farmer familiar with the territory, people, customs. Two gunship pilots but no gunship, one fighter pilot with mechanical abilities, same problem. Ten troopers, most partially scout trained, one familiar with the territory, a med barn with supplies, two houses; one as a secondary base or as an isolation hut. Five DC-15s, one hunting rifle, eight eopies, a dozen nuna, various farming and mechanical tools, a speeder."

"How do we fulfill our objectives?" Cody asked and Rex sighed.

"We keep other people, infected people, from coming here."

"Does that require lethal force?" asked Cody.

Rex crossed his arms and nodded slowly. "Yes. I think it will." He hadn't killed anyone since helping rescue Numa from the slaver.  He hadn't needed to kill anyone while bodyguarding, hadn't killed anyone between Order 66 and the slavers. Oddly, he knew he wouldn't hesitate.

Cody nodded. "Then that's what we'll use." He ran his fingers through his dark hair. "I'll make the call, Rex. I'll be in charge." He strode two steps toward the house then stilled and turned his face back to Rex.

"Rex, here's something they never taught us at Kamino. To wonder why? _Why_ is our primary objective protecting our women and our children?"

It took Rex a while to come up with the answer and Cody was gone before Rex spoke.

"Because they're our future."

Rex breathed in the air. Future. When he'd been in the GAR his future had been death; death in battle or death in another twenty years or so as he got older, slower. Now, his future was Barin and the little girl-child in Aureki's belly. Dimly, he could consider the possibility he might, one day, before he died, see a grandchild. He could consider that in a thousand years, there might be children of his blood and his body wandering in space or farming on Saleucami.

His face became stern and he moved to give orders regarding the camps. There could only be a future if the children survived.

* * *

Cody sat near the porch; close enough to talk with Saria. He'd told the men he wanted to speak privately with her, but at quarantine distance, privacy required their cooperation. There was not a man in sight.

"How are things going, Cody?" Absently, she rubbed her belly. It had softly rounded over the last week. He'd heard that she, Ahsoka and Aureki had compared belly bumps before Ahsoka's departure for Dantooine. He'd heard that Ahsoka had put her hands to Saria's belly and told her there were two children there. Jester had spent a lot of time talking with Saria. Before yesterday's quarantine, he'd spent an enormous amount of time simply touching her, doing things for her. She had originally seemed embarrassed when being touched in front of the men, at Jester's possessiveness. He'd heard that Jester and Crux had nearly come to blows over the afternoon shoulder rub.

Aureki glowed also. Rex would sit, simply watching her. Before their quarantine she would come and sit next to him, or curl her hand around his neck or on his shoulder or his stern face. Once she touched him, Rex would wrap his long arms around her and there would be an instant of rapture on his hard face.

Cody wondered if Barriss would have had that … luminescence … around her at three months pregnant. He smiled as he thought she might. In his memory, she was always lit with a glow from within.

"Cody," Saria spoke again, smiling at him and he came to the present with a startled chuckle.

"I guess pregnant women do that to all men" He laughed and she blushed. "Back to original question. Busy. We're re-structuring the camp due to the epidemic and quarantine. That's part of what I'd like to talk to you about. How are things in the house?"

"Not as bad as I expected. We all miss someone to hold, to hug. To sleep, comfortably in someone's arms. And it's only been one night."

"I understand." Cody said softly, thought it had been far more than one night since he'd slept with anyone..

"I'm sorry, Cody." Her voice was quiet and he nodded.

They sat quietly, remembering the last time they had curled up in love. Cody remembered a laughing Barriss and a gently chuckling Gree as they picnicked in Gree's quarters; he remembered Barriss in their arms, giggling as they drank wine from her belly button. Then she had insisted on pouring the wine onto threir bodies. That had been the night their child was conceived. He ducked his head in sorrow. It had been more than five years now and he wondered if he would ever not miss her.

Cody sighed. "I wanted you to know that due to this epidemic I will be implementing military rule here.

"Jester once said that war required decisive and immediate action. I suppose an epidemic counts as war."

"It does in this instance. This is not be a democracy. I am in charge."

She frowned. "Why not Rex? He's slightly more familiar with Saleucami."

"He is my second. When I make an order, it's his job to make sure I am aware of all aspects of what I am ordering before he carries it out. I have more training and actual experience in dealing with civilian populations. Besides," Cody grinned. "I've always outranked him."

Saria laughed and he let her laughter die to soft chuckles before he spoke again.

"I want you to be my second as well. I will need your specialized knowledge of diseases and Saleucami and civilians. Be aware that I will make decisions you do not like."

"Such as?" she looked at him quizzically.

"Lethal force." He said curtly.

"You can't do that," she objected and he smiled grimly.

"I've already implemented it, Saria. As I said, camp is changing even as we speak. Scout's camp is becoming outer ring; Numa and Shaeeah will be there but will not confront anyone. Each of them will have two partners at all times. Dantooine camp will be the inner perimeter, closer to the barn and house. Barin and Keeli will be there, easily moved to the barn at short notice. Jester's house will be isolation. Dantooine camp will have most of the blasters. Pregnant women will be confined to the house," he gestured at her with a smile, "or the porch as much as you'll tolerate."

She frowned. "What if we don't obey your orders?"

"I'll have one of my men sit on you," he said calmly.

"You wouldn't!" Saria was shocked at his seriousness.

"I would; although not literally sit on you. Unless absolutely necessary. I've already set a guard on the house and given instructions." He shook his head. "Don't take it as restriction, Saria. You'll be able to come out, take walks, whatever, with an escort at five meters. But we don't want the slightest chance that any of you will contact the disease." He glanced at the goldenfruit in his hand. "I don't want any of my men contacting the disease either; but my priorities have been set."

"They aren't my priorities." Saria crossed her arms, her lips drawn in a thin line.

"They probably are, if you give it a moment's thought. We're having a meeting tonight," he gestured at the front yard with the hand holding the fruit. "Here, so everyone will be here. Except Suu. I will explain it to the men; they will listen to me and they will do what I order."

She sighed.

"Partially because I order it." He smiled at her. "But also because I will explain it in the way that makes them want to follow those orders."

"I don't like it." Saria said.

"I don't either. Rex and Cut think the men have made a lot of progress in becoming what Chopper calls 'domesticated'."

Saria laughed. "That's a perfectly funny way to refer to it."

Cody shrugged. "Crux refers to it as being civilianized. But now we have to revert back to training and drill. Why don't you like it, Saria?"

She frowned. "I'm a citizen and there are certain freedom guaranteed to citizens."

"Yet the impetus behind the Rights of Sentience and all other freedoms is the collective rights; the rights of everyone in the community as opposed to the right of the individual." He finally split the goldenfruit and set it to his lips, tilting his head back and squeezing the sweet juice into his mouth. "But do those rights exist in the Empire? Until recently, who guaranteed and protected those rights? Troopers." He sighed. "Or at least, we thought that's what we were doing. It's what we wanted to do."

"We never know," said Saria. She let loosed a breath. "I'll do what I can to help you, help us all survive. Gurkhum of Ord Vestus was a little know poet who lived a very tragic life. His last words are writ on his tombstone. 'From blackness we rise, to blackness we go. What we do and how we live, we never truly know'."

* * *

**Isolation III - Rainy Season Coming**

Cut flicked off the comm link, leaned against the door with his head back and his eyes shut. She'd made it. She was as near as home to be there, she hadn't been in the market. He let out a breath. The din of arguing voices in background was nothing to the thundering of his heart. Safe, she's safe, he told himself. _For the moment_ , whispered a dark corner of his mind.

He felt a hand on his shoulder and opened his eyes. Sinker was there and, as Cut opened his eyes, there was a flick of Sinker's eyes toward the men on the warehouse floor. Cut recognized the voices were getting louder, more aggressive, and he turned, noticing the belligerent stance of some of the men. Chios had welcomed Sinker, taken him out and set him in one of the loading crews. Then he had left, cheerily telling Cut he was taking an early day and a long lunch and Cut was in charge.

"Hey, hey," Cut's stern voice cut into the group even as he walked to the center of the floor. Sinker was behind him, covering his back, as if they'd left the battlefield only yesterday. "There's been enough of that in the market; we don't need to continue that here." The two groups were in predictable lines.

"It's 'cause of them sinking, 'fectious migrants," growled out Korly, a big Wroonian who took pride in being able to outwork anyone else. His fists were clenched. "They say there's fourteen dead in the market."

"Mostly migrants," snorted Bisyar, a tough little Gran with a reputation; a migrant, though one Chios had been hiring yearly since before Cut had arrived on Saleucami.

Cut shook his head. "No one knows anything for sure except there's a quarantine. And if you're going to fight, you'll need to take it outside." They started to move toward the big doors, Bisyar keeping one of his three eyes on his opponent; Korly snorting, his fists relaxing and tensing. They'd almost reached the door. Cut pressed the remote and they heard the big doors lock. They wheeled around, their anger glaring at Cut. "But first, you're going to listen to me."

Korly growled again, his face turning a dark blue in his anger. "Don't gotta listen to some deskhumper."

Cut held up the remote. "You do if you want out of here."

"Just take it from you." Korly strode forward, his body all tense anger, stopping only when his next step would have put him through and behind Cut. His breath skimmed over Cut's face.

"You can try, Korly." Cut said in a friendly manner. "But the easy way is simply to sit and listen for a few minutes. See, Bisyar has already sat down, conserving his energy."

Korly glanced back. Bisyar had moved away from the door, toward some of the grain pallets, leaning against them with some other migrants, his muscled arms crossed. Korly moved back, muttering imprecations, to his group of men, they took the equipment side of the big warehouse.

"There's a quarantine on Issuya. It doesn't matter what the disease is or where it originated. The important thing is the officials will try to contain it. They may block off sections of town and if they do, you know the work district will be one of the earliest blocked and the one with the most guards."

Both Korly and Bisyar snorted, along with many of the men. There were workers, lower-class, and they understood was Cut was saying.

"So, I'm telling you to leave. I'm also telling you to not go home if you can manage that or to stay away from your families for a day or two. Until they know what this is. Until you know that your family has not been infected." He turned toward Sinker. "Sinker, get the cash box." As Sinker turned to go into the office, Cut turned back to the group. "I'm going to split the cash evenly among all of us. I will be locking the big doors. The side door has a code lock, 5299. If anyone needs to come back here and stay, that'll be fine. I'll be in and out, occasionally. If Chios objects, it'll be my skin." Both groups of men chuckled. They all knew Chios as an understanding man.

Sinker handed him the cash box and Cut divided the amount between the twenty-odd workers, including himself and Sinker. It was, at most, two days' pay, but some of the men might need the cash. He unlocked the big door. Most of the men went, Bisyar and two other Gran wandered over to Cut.

"You saying we might be infectious?" He asked, his voice without inflection.

"I'm saying I'm not going home to my family until I know that I'm not infectious." Cut replied and Sinker nodded in emphasis.

One of Bisyar's eyes glanced back to the other Gran, his other two observed Cut and Sinker. "Think maybe it's okay we stay here? Guard the warehouse? Quarantine ourselves from outside until we're sure it's safe to go back to our families?"

Cut nodded. "It's a good idea." He gestured to the side door. "The override code is 38959 if you need to lock it." He held out his hand to the Gran. "Good luck."

"You too, Cut. You're a good man." Bisyar turned to Sinker. "Good luck." Sinker nodded, reached out and shook the Gran's six-fingered hand.

Cut and Sinker left by the side door, a small pack over Cut's shoulder. Sinker had brought his entire duffle, too new to the idea of owning things to leave them behind at the apartment.

Together they loped towards the apartment, Cut slightly in the lead. There weren't many people out on the streets and a good percentage of those were officials of various types trying to cordon off areas with traffic barriers. Most of the civilians seemed to be rushing home and tended to avoid brushing up against anyone else. A glance showed that most of the officials weren't armed, simply using their authority to command people and the people, use to deferring to bureaucracy, obeyed.

Suddenly there was the sound of blaster fire and Cut dodged around a column of an arch, taking cover. He glanced back to see Sinker tucked in a doorway. Sinker nodded, his fingers making the 'all ok' signal. Then he held up three fingers, flicking one up and down as he had yesterday. A bounty hunter. Cut nodded. Sinker frowned and tapped himself in the chest. _My fault_.

Cut shrugged his shoulders. Maybe he had or hadn't followed Sinker, keeping an eye on the warehouse. Cut had been on Saleucami a lot longer. It was possible someone had finally discovered his presence.

 _Stay_ , he signaled with a flat palm at Sinker. _Distract_ , signed his fingers. Sinker nodded then glanced his head out the doorway quickly; simply motion for the bounty hunter to try targeting.

Cut half-climbed and half-pulled himself up the column. It was soft yellow stone, the archway over the narrowness of a residential street and it lead into municipal gardens that covered most of the buildings on Saleucami. There hadn't been another shot since the first and Cut knew the hunter was moving; probably to get Sinker, trapped in the doorway, in view.

Cut was in the garden now, moving swiftly through the greenery. There was a circumscribed pathway. Cut avoided it. He came upon a Wroonian couple, deep in an embrace, but passed them by before they had finished the kiss. He glanced to his left and saw, through some feathery leaves, Sinker in the doorway. Sinker saw him, gestured at an angle to Cut, moving his hand.

 _Go when_ , he signaled then ducked back into the leaves and headed toward where the bounty hunter was moving. He moved from swift to silent; recent scout training coming into play.

It was a large human, or humanoid, and wore one of the long, light-colored robes common on Saleucami, the hood covering his face. Easy enough to hide weapons in those voluminous folds. He was raising the blaster to Sinker and Cut, hoping he didn't have a partner, rushed in to grapple the man to the ground.

He felt the heavy bulk of muscle on the man and was pounding with his fists even before hitting the ground. There was the soft thud of the heavy blaster hitting the cultivated soil and then the heavier thud of both bodies hitting the ground. Cut felt a stinger blade against his arm and rolled to one side, coming up on his feet. The bounty hunter was only a heartbeat behind him. He was Wroonian, big and fast, and faintly familiar.

"You worked at the warehouse, didn't you?" said Cut as he maneuvered himself with his back to the pathway.

"Just a season," snarled the man. "A few years back. Didn't recognize you for what you were, clone. Not then." He used the word as insult. "I've traveled since then."

He slashed at Cut with the knife, expecting Cut to leap back. "Seen a hundred men with your face."

Instead, Cut stepped into the circle of his arm, catching the arm with both hands and pushing his shoulder into the taller man with his weight. He landed hard on his back, with Cut atop him, but kept hold of the knife.

"You didn't watch them close enough." Cut replied as the man struggled both to release his arm and to move out from under Cut.

"Ten thousand creds, clone. That's what the Empire is paying for traitors."

Cut tried to reach his throat with one hand, but the Wroonian caught it in his teeth and bit, holding onto the outer edge of Cut's hand, Cut's blood running through his teeth, coloring them, merging with the purple of his gums. Cut stifled a sharp curse as the teeth bit deeper and held on. His legs had come up, wrapped around the man's arm and Cut let go of the muscular arm and punched into the dark blue throat. It was a small target, usually not worth trying for. The blue man's body fell limp.

There was a noise coming in from the pathway and Cut had the blaster in his bloody, almost nerveless, hand. It was Sinker. Cut dropped the weapon and put his good hand around his wound.

"I think he's dead, Sinker. But make sure." Sinker nodded. While Cut bandaged his hand with a strip from the man's cape, Sinker checked the Wroonian and slipped the blaster and stinger knife into his duffle.

"Rob. Ree?" he asked Cut, then pulled the man's wallet at Cut's assent.

He was glad it hadn't been a clone, he thought as he wrapped his bleeding hand. He didn't know what he would have done if he had looked down into a pair of golden-brown eyes.

Sinker came close, reached out his hand to tie off Cut's bandage then tightened the duffle strap across his chest.

"Few more minutes, Sinker. Then we'll be there." Cut picked up his small pack, pulled off during the struggle and slipped it over his shoulder.

The main thoroughfare to Saria's apartment was blocked. Cut didn't even pause, simply leapt the barrier and kept running in spite of the yells and sound of pounding feet that followed for a short distance. Sinker was only a breath behind him. They easily outdistanced the pursuers, desk bureaucrats trying to do something they'd never been trained for.

They passed Saria's then doubled back to the rear of the building. Sinker gave Cut a boost to the second floor then clambered up as far as he could without assistance. By then, Cut had his good hand down to assist.

Sinker sat on a chair as Cut opened the patio door. By chance it was the same one he'd sat in earlier that day. He saw some wisps of his cut hair against one of the potted plants.

"Bad. Start." He said.

Cut unlocked the door. "Well, you got paid. if everything goes well, you'll have a job there when this is all over."

Sinker merely frowned. He slumped, his shoulders rounded; so different from his enthusiasm of the morning. He bit out his thoughts. "No. Luck." He made a throwing motion with his arm, but the small handful of hair simply tumbled in the evening breeze. His lips twisted and he looked at Cut with moisture softening his golden eyes. "Never."

"Not your fault, Sinker," murmured Cut as he turned on the holovid for news then moved to the kitchen where Saria kept a first aid kit. He sat on the couch, listening attentively to the news, as he cleaned his hand and rubbed in some bacta salve. He'd let it bleed a bit more, to clean it out.

The news was all bad, except the implications, which were worse. There were fourteen dead in the market riot; caused by one of the sellers, who had died. He'd been coughing, complaining of chills and was packing up to go home when he had simply slumped over his table. Cut absently wondered what he'd been selling, knew he probably wasn't a migrant. Why a riot for something so simply and seemingly quiet.

There were the usual demagogues; it was because of the migrants, it was because of the solar arcs, the hand of wrath, or the oncoming rainy season; take your pick. Cut flicked it off and glanced out to the patio. Sinker seemed to be taking it personally.

Sinker came in from the patio, then. He touched Cut lightly on the shoulder and, when Cut looked up, pointed out toward the horizon where a dark line of clouds made an ugly streak across the sky.

Cut sighed. "The rainy season is upon us."

* * *

**Rainy Season**

Suu - Isolation

Suu sat at the entrance of the tent, her legs drawn up to her chest, her arms circling her legs. She watched a line of black clouds as they slowly drifted closer. Rainy season in the calderas of Saleucami was mostly warm. Rarely was there thunder or lightning, simply the opening of heavy, black clouds filled with the water that softened the soil and moistened the seedling crops. Rain would fall, solid for three or four days, then slacken for a day of overcast sun and return again in force for another three or four days. Over the course of a tenday, the dark fields would turn brilliant green.

Her fields would be green. Cut and Jester and their brothers had worked hard, setting out the seed, covering it with the fertilizer net. The net would catch the water, ensuring the seeds didn't wash out, then slowly dissolve over the season.

She glanced into the fire. It would be gone as soon as the rain started. She had talked with Cut last night. He and Sinker were well. He had mentioned that traitors to the Empire were worth a 10,000 credit bounty and then, laughingly, offered to turn bounty hunter. She knew that had been a code and when they ended the call in the murmurs of 'I love you', she asked Shy to tell Cody. She expected Cody or Rex, or both, to come to her little isolation camp, sit five meters away and question her about the call. She suspected that Cut and Sinker had run into one. Suu sighed. After eight years on Saleucami, it wouldn't be surprising if one had discovered her husband. Perhaps he had been following Sinker, although she didn't think so. Sinker, with his light hair and his battered face didn't look like his brothers.

Suu sighed, thinking of the dark, fertile soil of her farm, of the bright green of new seedlings. She thought of the eopies, their warm, animal smell and their drooling friendliness. She thought of the nuna, their hisses and chubble noises. She thought of the house and outbuildings that Cut had repaired, the thermal pool they'd modified, even the big protective galik trees in her front yard that people liked to climb. There was so much here that made it home, so much here that she loved.

Suu put her hands over her face. If Cut had to run, she'd leave it all behind.

Quad – Outer Ring

Quad glanced down at Shaeeah from his seat near the small fire. They had reshuffled camps again. Scouts camp was now outer ring – the perimeter to protect them all from Red Shadow Virus. Any intruders would be turned away.

Overhead, on the tarp under the tree, he could hear the rain. It seemed to drum softly on the material and the sound was comforting. Inner ring had authority to use lethal force as necessary. Cody had explained the quarantine, the results of the disease, and asked what they should do. Every man there had nodded grimly at the use of lethal force. Quad looked into Shaeeah's peaceful face, vowing he would not lose her to any disease.

Numa and Shaeeah had been asked to go to the barn, but had refused. Numa had Boil and Waxer to watch over her. Cody had asked for volunteers for Shaeeah and she had balked. Cody had simply said 'volunteer partners or the barn, your choice' and she'd decided partners sounded ok. Chopper had been the first to volunteer, reminding the others with an easy grin and a wink at the girl that Shaeeah knew how to cook. Quad had volunteered second.

Shaeeah was asleep under the tarp on her blankets. Chopper's big arm was slung protectively over her shoulders. She was curled up, her back to his chest, her head tucked under his chin, her lekku gently curled around his bicep. Quad smiled. She liked sleeping like that; tightly curled leaning against him or one of his brothers. She loved sleeping between him and Chopper, her own arm draped protectively over him. He liked it too. Sometimes her hand slipped under his shirt, pressing against the skin of his chest; sometimes it draped over his groin.

He liked Shaeeah; liked sharing friendship, sharing the joy of their kisses, their touching. Nothing in his imagination had ever felt like that. He had talked to some of the men, Fives in particular, about sex, about knowing how to please a woman. Quad smiled in his secret heart. Apparently, he had done well in pleasing Shaeeah.

Quad had decided he wanted her and each day on Saleucami only reinforced that decision. He would stay on Saleucami. He would farm with her family, with his brothers Cut and Jester, probably a few others. He would work hard. He'd ask about giving her children one day. He would give her everything he could. If Shaeeah wished, he'd share her with other brothers; she seemed open to the possibility.

They hadn't talked about any of that yet. It was too solid, too defining at the moment. Neither he nor Shaeeah were ready to talk about what their bodies had already promised. Quad decided he'd go through the entire debriefing, only psyc remained, as though he were going to Dantooine or some other planet. But he wouldn't go and in a year he would ask her if she would marry him. He'd give her another year to decide; a year in which he would build a house for her.

For now, there was only closeness, the touching of their lips, the sweet warmth of her body, the pleasure they gave each other.

Quad smiled and moved quietly, curling on his blanket in front of Shaeeah. She half-woke, her hands moved; one shifting under his neck, the other slipping under his shirt to absently stroke his back, then was still as she drifted back to sleep.

He wondered if this was like love.

Rex – Inner Ring

Rex was afraid. Originally it had been planned that Barin would be with Aureki, his mama 'ki, in the house. Saria had vetoed that and Barin was at camp with him and Echo. Rex didn't think it would be a problem with Echo there. Barin could curl up with Echo. It would be Echo responsible for taking him to the barn if drifters got that close.

But lately, possibly under Jek's influence; Jek with only one father, Barin had started singling Rex out as his father, his primary masculine influence in a sea of brothers. And it was at the side of Rex's bedroll that Barin spread out his blankets and set his small pack of favorite toys.

Silently, Echo reset his bedroll on the other side of Rex, as close as a lover. "I'll know, Rex. You tense up when you're having one of those nightmares. I'll know and I'll wake up in time."

Fives had raised an eyebrow and reset his bedroll on the outside of Barin's. "I'll be there, too, Rex. I'll cover Barin."

Rex nodded, swallowing hard, ashamed of his night terrors.

"I'll let the others in camp know about my nightmares." He glanced at Echo. "In case it happens. I wouldn't want it to be a surprise."

Echo had nodded.

Saria – House

Jester came up to sitting at the back door. The rain dripped down the contours of his face and his hair was darker for the moisture in it. She smiled and kissed her fingertips, spreading them outward toward him. He smiled and sat on the soggy grass five meters away.

"Stand up, Saria and show me." He called. "If I can't run my fingers over your belly and touch them, I want to see my babies."

She laughed. He was getting use to the idea of twins. When she told him that Ahsoka had planted her hands on Saria's belly bump and announced twins, his legs had lost their strength and he had fallen to the soft ground. Of course, in mere seconds he had her in his lap and was laughing and kissing her.

Saria stood from the chair and turned sideways, then pulled her shirt tightly around her tummy. She looked at him, blushing in embarrassment, and the look on his face made her heart flutter.

"You're beautiful, Saria." His voice was low, barely reaching her ears. "You are the most beautiful woman in the galaxy and I am so much in love with you."

She blushed an even deeper red and sat down in the chair, unable to speak. She heard him chuckle and glanced into his eyes.

"I will tell you that every day, Saria." Then he grinned at her. "You're turning as red as Sula." His fingers twisted some strands of wet grass as he looked down. She knew he was nervous about something.

"What's the matter, Jester?"

"Are you going to be alright? I mean, is having twins …" he trailed off, his eyes worried, his smile gone.

"There's always a danger for women having children, but it's miniscule. Even for women having twins. I'll make sure Kix is well-trained and ready for anything."

Jester laughed. "You'd better start soon. He starts hyperventilating when he hears the word 'pregnant'.

"As soon as I'm out of here." She smiled and for a while there were no words between them as they loved each other with their eyes. Then Jester sighed heavily.

"I need to go to Cass Cjain's house, Saria. She lives close enough to us, closer than Arybas, and she needs to know how we're going to handle things."

"I know," she sighed. "Just don't let her do anything like last time."

Jester shook his head. "Certainly not what I want, even if there wasn't a quarantine on. I'll maintain five meters distance." He was quiet for a moment. "Makes me wish Cut was here. There's enough mutual antipathy between them…." He looked at the ground then up into her eyes. "I'll take someone with me," his smile turned lop-sided. "Just for company. He can stay back while I talk with her."

Cass Cjain

Cass slammed the door of the speeder. They weren't letting anyone into Issuya. She threw one of the goldenfruit at the tree stump. She had a good aim and the fruit hit with a soggy sounding splat. Angrily she went into the house, her hair was already limp and soaked from the rain, the nice dress she'd worn plastered to her body. A sharp edge on one of the cut stumps scrapped her leg and Cass gasp at the sudden pain. She looked to see blood dripping down her leg.

Once in the house, she cleaned the blood and put on a touch of antiseptic and small band. It wasn't a bad cut, just above her knee, and it wasn't ragged like it was from a scrap of tree bark or wood. For a moment she wondered what had caused it then shrugged. Cass changed into her overalls, hanging the dress up to dry, and put on a rain slicker.

She had hoped to buy fresh food in the market today, had hoped the quarantine would be over. There'd been nothing in the news except the planetary quarantine; surely if the quarantine was worldwide that meant the townships would be open. Apparently not.

There were supplies in the storage shed and then she would light a fire in the living room while she read. A fire was always good on a rainy day. Cass ran out the door to the shed and pulled down several days-worth of edibles. She paused and then grabbed a box of chocolates that _he_ had sent her. A week before _he_ had broken up with her. "Poodoo bastard," she muttered under her breath as she shoved the bag of supplies onto the kitchen table. She went back outside to the firewood stacked by the side of the house under a roof. She looked at the pitifully small stack. _He_ had promised _he_ would cut her some firewood too. At least it was dry. The wood and chopping stump were under an elongated roof that she was hoping to build into a patio and grill area.

Cass muttered under her breath again as she set a log on the stump and, with measured pace, began splitting wood for the fire. Her anger kept her warm and she had thrown off the slicker for ease of movement. _He_ had promised to deed her the little house. She wondered if _he_ had done so. Somehow, she doubted it. _He_ had promised a lot of things.

Cass split one of the logs into smaller pieces of kindling. She stacked the wood high in her arms, hoping to make only one trip. She tucked her chin onto the top log and started toward the door. Her foot caught in a hole made deeper by the rain and she fell, heavily enough to daze her for a moment. The wood scattered in front of her. Her ankle hurt and so did her belly. Tears poured down her face with the rain.

* * *

"Hey, Cass." Jester yelled. He saw the speeder and knew she was home. Crux was a few feet behind him, semi-hid by Jester's body. "Cass!" Jester called. He noticed the firewood scattered by the front entrance, the door open. "You stay here, Crux, I'll go check the door."

Crux grinned. "And if she attacks with intent to seduce, I throw myself bodily in front of you."

Jester chuckled. "That's about right."

While Jester went to the door, Crux sat on a tree stump. He knocked softly, then slightly harder. "Cass? Are you home? Cass, it's Jester. I'm just checking to see how you are."

Her heard her voice, weak and muffled, come from the bedroom.

"I'm in the bedroom, Jester."

He'd make sure not to go into the house.

"I'm just back from town and I tripped. I twisted my ankle real bad and I'm really …" He heard a deep sigh. "I'm just not in a good mood but thanks for thinking of me."

"Saria says that this disease could be deadly. We're hunkering down at Cut and Suu's for the quarantine, my place will be for quarantine if one of us gets exposed." Jester paused. "Saria suggests that if you have the supplies, you don't let anyone into the house with you until this mess is over. We're keeping a five meter distance as well as three days if anyone of us comes in contact with an outsider."

"No. I don't think anyone will be visiting." Her voice sounded sad and small and pathetic. He heard a sniffle. "I've got plenty of foodstuff in the shed for a month, at least. I'll be fine. Just terribly bored of nerf jerky by then."

"I'll come back in a few days to check on you again." Jester looked at the split logs scattered on the mud. He chewed at his inner lip. "Right now, I'll cut you some more firewood and bring some of your supplies to the door."

Another sniffle sounded from the bedroom. "That would be wonderful, Jester. I would appreciate that." There was a moment's silenct. "Jester. I'm sorry about ... the last time you were here. I'd just been told..." Again there was quiet broken only by her sniffles. "Not important, but I am sorry."

Jester motioned Crux over. Crux was looking down at his hand were a small line of blood trailed from his little finger into his palm. It had already started to coagulate. He glanced up to Jester.

"Just some glass imbedded into the stump." Crux glanced toward the house. "She throws things when she gets angry?"

Jester nodded. "She's got a good aim and a strong arm, too. I'll get some supplies inside the door if you'll chop wood."

Edge – Med Barn

Edge climbed into the loft above the eopie stalls transformed into sleeping areas. The loft was his place and he liked it. There was the comforting scent of dried hay intermixed with mint. Jek had told him to add mint and shown him where to find and how to identify it. There was a double-door opening under wide eaves and he usually preferred it open. The eaves kept the rain from coming inside while moist air pervaded a space that had been musty the first week but was now fresh.

Now it was Edge's haven. He had arranged his bedroll so his head was by the opening. He could look out at night to see the double moons or the front of the house, the porch and the front yard. He could sit easily in the loft with visitors, playing sabacc or simply listening as they talked. He had taken some cordage and shims to make it easy to adjust the opening doorways.

A small picture that Sketch had drawn for him was tacked up in a place of honor on the wall. Beneath it was a small shelf that Edge had built with wood scraps from Jester's housebuilding. There were a few things on the shelf; two data-books, one of first aid from Kix, the other a natural history guide to Saleucami from Jester. There was a beautifully green stone he had found near the thermal pool as well as a brown seedpod that he had carved and polished into a small, hand-size bowl.

Edge sighed. He could see Aureki on the porch, blushing. Fives was not too far from her with a pleased grin on his face. Edge shut half the opening. He didn't want to see them; didn't want to see Aureki's beautiful form. He and his brothers agreed that she was the most pregnant of the women.

Edge breathed out. He had wanted to marry Saria for her children and for children of his own. He had liked her and thought he could love her if she had chosen him. He had been disappointed, certainly not heartbroken, when she had declined his proposal. Yet, in another way, he had been heartbroken. Edge wanted children like other people wanted to breath.

He couldn't watch Sula with baby peach for more than a few minutes without hurrying to the barn, though the one time Sula has pressed peach into his arms, he hadn't moved between breakfast and lunch. Edge had been mesmerized by her perfection, running his finger gently over her soft skin, delicately holding her to his face letting her hands roam over his skin, his nose, his lips, his eyes. He was one of Keeli's favorite playmates; willing to be a mountain for the little boy to climb over or a giant bird who would hold him to the sky and make flying noises. Even Barin, with his two fathers, liked playing with Edge; games of chase-tag or hide and seek.

Edge knew he'd be a good father. One day he'd like to look into a child's face and see his own blue eyes looking back at him.

* * *

**Illness**

The rain had extinguished the fire and both Shy and Crux had deserted her for Jester's house; Shy with an embarrassed, wet grimace. She had laughed and told him to take a nice, long, hot shower at Jester's and his grimace went to a grin. Suu rubbed the comm bracelet absently with a pink finger as she sat in the tent and watched the rain falling in thick, grey sheets. Cut would call her in a short while, before they both went to sleep with each other's voice and love words in their memory. She hadn't shown any symptoms of the red shadow virus and tomorrow she could go back home, at least to the barn.

Shy had told her Saria wouldn't let her in the house yet and Suu could understand that paranoia about the pregnancies of Saria and Aureki. Softly, she rubbed her tummy. She was pretty sure she had joined that bunch as well. She wondered if it would be a boy or a girl; certainly not twins; twins were extremely rare in Twi'lek. It would be nice to have another daughter. Laes would be a lovely name. She closed her eyes, smiling at her thoughts.

The bracelet alerted her, Cut was on the other side of that comm. She opened the link. "Hi Cut, I've been waiting for your call like some teenager." She heard a chuckle over the link.

"I usually feel like a teenager when I'm around you, Suu. I could talk forever but this call needs to be short." His voice had turned hard and a little tight, as if he were angry or had been running, or both.

"Is there any new problems, Cut?" Of course there were problems, quarantine, bounty hunters, red shadow virus. "I've told the others and we're almost ready for a siege. Are you in any trouble."

"No, Suu. Just a normal day in paradise." He gave a short laugh. "Nothing new. We're hunkered down in the apartment. Got everything we need." He cleared his throat. "Sinker's a bit down on not going to work since the first day. He thinks he's bad luck." There was a growl in the background, presumably Sinker's response. "We've glad that Saria had a deck of cards, we've been playing Sabacc, brought the plants in from the porch, listening to the news. That's worthless." He paused, as if thinking what to say.

"I'll make sure everyone knows that. We thought as much." Suu traced her finger along the tent's edge, where rain was darkening the entrance. She should close it, but it was too warm in the enclosed tent. Cut continued speaking.

"They've cordoned off the various sections of town from each other; work district the most, of course, but the rain is keeping almost everyone inside anyway. How are you doing?" His voice strained a bit, afraid she'd tell him she was ill.

"I'm fine, Cut. I would have died of boredom but Crux and Shy have kept me very good company; they haven't even returned to the house at the same time simply so I wouldn't be alone. Tomorrow I can go back to the barn." She bowed her head down and whispered her next words. "I miss you the most at night."

"Me too, Suu." She could hear tears in his voice.

"Only a couple of days and I miss you like nothing else. Gotta go now, Suu. I love you."

She smiled at his words.

"I love you, Cut. I hope this quarantine doesn't last too long."

"Me too. I have to go, Suu." The little tone sounded the end of transmission, but she stared at it. She'd heard the squeezing of his voice at the end of the sentence, that intake of breath and, right before the tone, the start of a cough.

"Don't you dare get sick, Cut. Don't you dare." She spoke to the comm. "Don't you dare." Her eyes filled with tears and she quickly flicked the comm back on. The tone told her his comm was off. "Don't you dare, Cut," she whispered into the rain. "Please."

* * *

"Well, Suu," Shy smiled as he walked up to the tent in the morning's coolness and held out his hand for her. "Let's go back home. You'll get the barn, of course. Saria's cot. They're putting me in the inner ring, Crux in the outer." The rain had stopped but would begin again sometime in the late night.

"I'll miss the bed," Crux muttered, standing near a tree a couple of meters away.

"And the shower." Shy's turned his head to his brother for an instant then back to Suu. "I swear he was in the shower all last night. I'd be surprised if there's any hot water left on Saleucami." Shy shook his head.

Suu had stood and reached for her pack of clothes but Shy was faster and had the pack in his hands before her fingers touched it. They turned together and Shy put his arm tentatively on Suu's waist. His hand added balance to her as they walked on the slick grass.

He gulped. "It's not, you know, anything …" His voice quieted as Suu's still tenseness caught his attention. She was looking at Crux and Crux was looking at her with a frown, his brown eyes dark with some hidden emotion.

Crux's eyes suddenly widened and he took a step back. Rather, he tried to take a step back, but even as he did so, his body swayed and his head dropped forward as though he were too tired to lift it. His shoulders began to follow and Suu took a step toward him. Crux raised his hands to push her away. She caught him as he slumped forward.

He was heavy, all muscle and bone, but Suu was a farmer and stronger than her slimness told. Her arms went around him and, as his weight crushed against her, only her knees bent. She heard the sound of her pack slapping against the ground and Shy was with her, his arms also around Crux, holding the other half of his brother.

"I'm sorry, Suu." Crux was pale, his face shiny with sweat. "You should have let me fall."

Suu put her hand to his face. She didn't have to, she could feel the heat of fever throughout his body as he leaned against her. His face burned against her palm. Suddenly there were tears in his eyes.

"I didn't know," he said softly. "I haven't coughed or felt bad until just now. I'm sorry."

"Shy," Suu's voice cut through the stillness. "We're not going back home today."

* * *

**Gray Rain**

Suu and Shy helped Crux to the house. He'd begun to shiver and, by the time they reached the door, his teeth were clattering around hissing breaths.

"I'm cold," he complained, more afraid of how quickly the symptoms attacked than of the illness itself. He lifted his hands to show them his curled fingers. "They're cramping."

"Hot shower," commanded Suu and Shy nodded. They made it to the shower and sat Crux on the small bench of towels. Quickly, they stripped him.

"Impa-pa-patient wo-wo-woman," he smiled at Suu as she pulled his shirt off his trembling frame.

Shy was stripping as well, then turned on the water and reached down for his brother's arm. "Come on, Crux, into the shower with us. Let's see how much hot water remains."

Crux smiled and winked at Suu. "Doesn't 'us' include her? If I only get one of you, I want her."

"Then I couldn't warm your bed," she teased back. He double-blinked then smiled.

"Saria may have taught me to flirt, but I am only a lowly apprentice to your m-mastery." Crux smiled, then he grimaced and began shivering violently again. Too much to stand on his own feet and he leaned against Shy.

Suu left the shower room as Crux started crying softly; in pain or shame or both. She threw some light blankets into the dryer, set some water and anodyne on the nightstand, got out the medkit that Saria had given to Jester – so much more useful than a standard, commercial medkit. There wasn't much else she knew to do. Someone would come to the house soon to find out why they weren't at breakfast. She'd tell them to ask Saria what to prepare for, to keep the others away and to find out how Crux had gotten the disease. No one had gotten any closer to her than five meters since she'd left Issuya.

Jester moved into the tent under the assumption that it had been at Cass Cjain's house where Crux had been infected. Saria had begun the count again for the women in the house. Four more days of quarantine. Cody, Rex and Kix had come down, staying the correct distance, to interview both Suu and Shy. They'd had questions, so many questions, about how Crux could possibly have gotten infected. Then Kix had wanted to see Crux and they took him to the window of the room where Crux huddled in his blankets, shivering, his face pale. He had pushed one hand out of the bundle to show Kix his cramping fingers curled into fists. Cody muttered under his breath, Kix observed and Rex's face turned grey. Saria knew he was thinking of his family. They were all thinking of family.

The rain had begun again and Shaeeah looked miserable pressed against the window. She had an umbrella, of course, but the grayness of the early evening and the pale moon of her face underscored the dreariness of the day. A slight distance away, sheltering under a tree, waiting for her was one of the men. Shaeeah wanted to talk to Cut; wanted to talk to her father.

The comm link switched on with a tone. There was silence although Suu could hear the soft breath of a waiting man.

"Where's Cut?" she asked.

"Sick." Burst the word from Sinker's lips and Suu put her fingertips on her lips and sat heavily in the chair, tears starting in her eyes. She handed the comm bracelet to Shy. Shaeeah pressed her hands against the window. She'd known, when she'd heard that catch in his voice yesterday. She'd known when he'd turned off the link immediately after the call. She'd known and couldn't understand why it was such a shock right now.

"Wants. Know. Safe? Suu?" continued Sinker.

"Suu's fine, a little thinner but that's all." spoke Shy as he set his palm over her slender, pink hand and gave it a quick, squeeze. "Crux came down with a little chill, but we're curious because he had no contact with anyone."

"How about you, Sinker. How are you doing?"

"Can't. Cook." That brought a smile to Suu and Shaeeah. Behind Shaeeah, Quad gave a chuckle.

"How are things in town, Sinker?" ask Shaeeah and she had an intent look on her face. Suu knew Cody or Rex had requested that information. "We hear a lot of talk, speculation, but no facts. They're censoring the reports." That was definitely a request from Cody for information, for facts.

"Bad." A long pause. "Food. Sh .. short. Riots. Night. Gangs." Sinker breathed heavily. Shy understood that he wanted to tell them more, that he wanted to give a full, accurate and detailed report. That he wanted to stand at attention in front of the commander and simply download everything he knew, everything he'd seen, heard, thought since the quarantine had started.

"Can you manage?" asked Suu.

"Sh..sho'r. Blaster. Cano. Pner." Sinker's voice was satisfied and Suu nodded. It was more than he'd had a few weeks ago.

"Can I talk to Cut, Sinker?" Suu asked. "If he's not resting." What a stupid thing to say. Of course he was resting.

"Short," directed Sinker and Suu's eyes stung.

She heard weak coughing then Cut's tired voice. "I love you, you know."

Suu closed her eyes. This was not how she pictured telling him. "I love you, Cut. I want you to know. We're going to have a child."

"That's great." There was a volley of harsh coughing that dragged Suu down to the floor. Shy had his arms around her, flowing to the floor, taking her weight, letting her fall on him. She didn't cry, she didn't want to hurt Cut that way. He wouldn't want her to cry.

"Especially after all that work I did." Cut's voice joked, he chuckled in almost his normal tone of voice. "Love you. Don't get sick. Got to g…" Another coughing fit cut into his voice.

"Not yet, Cut. Shaeeah wants to talk to you." Suu said as Shaeeah tapped on the glass several times. Suu set the comm bracelet next to the window. She could hear Shaeeah shout through the glass and hoped Cut could as well.

"Get well soon, dad. We love you and miss you." Then Shaeeah's lip quivered and her shoulders shook. Quad, Suu recognized as he came closer, grabbed Shaeeah into a hug and let her sob into his chest. The comm toned the end of the connection.

With shaking fingers, Suu held the comm link up. Someone took it. She buried her face in someone's shoulder, his shirt clutched in her fingers, and cried. Someone held her, stroked her shoulder, made comforting noises, carried her, and tucked a blanket around her. It didn't matter who. It wasn't Cut.

Suu woke in the middle of the night as the he shifted next to her in bed. Outside the window she could see silver moonlight reflect off the leaves of trees and the grass. He held her, his body around hers, one arm under her head, the other around her waist. She shivered in despair, and he, mistaking it for cold, pulled a dryer-warmed blanket around her.

"I just made sure Crux had warm blankets." Shy's voice, Cut's voice, said quietly. "Been getting up every hour checking on him."

Shy held her, as a child, soothing her with whispered words. She wondered who had told him this. A crying woman scared all the single men; he should have run.

* * *

**So Much Laughter, So Much Love**

Crux felt bad.

Not just ill; not just racked with coughing and shivers. Not just the torturous twisting cramps in his fingers and feet, not just the cold he hadn't felt even on the frozen waste of Orto Plutonia. Not just the weakness he hadn't felt since they'd punished him in solitary confinement for five days without food or water.

Bad.

Cross.

Irritable.

Surly.

Angry.

Disgusted.

Annoyed.

Regretful.

Contrite.

Dejected.

He hadn't noticed he'd been ill. He should have. Crux wished there was a tree or wall within an inch of his forehead so he could pound some sense into it. There was only a soft pillow and a blanket hooded over him.

He had used all the hot water last night. It had felt good. He hadn't been chilled; it had simply felt good to have the hot water running down his skin.

He had coughed yesterday. Once. After he and Shy had wrestled, quite seriously, over the last goldenfruit in the kitchen. The loser would have to go outside in the rain to pick a fresh fruit off one of the trees. Of course, there was no place open enough inside Jester's abode to get a really good fight going so they'd gone outside and wrestled in the downpour. Crux had been glad no one had been there to watch. His defeat at the hands of Shy was, indeed, inglorious and he had coughed out bits of grass, mud and rain.

The loud clicking noise was his teeth. He couldn't control his _kriffing_ jaw. Tears came to his eyes as he looked out the window. It was gray, wet, and dark. The women would be in the house fixing their dinner. Crux imagined they would have a feast. He closed his eyes and imaged Saria, her bright laughter flooding the cozy main room of the house; watching Aureki, her belly bump pushing her shirt so anyone could see the flash of skin at her waist, stirring flour with her hands to make bread while Sula sat in the comfortable chair feeding the peach. Except they wouldn't be smiling, Crux realized. They'd be quiet; each missing members of their family.

Crux imagined again. He put Jester behind Saria, one arm absently around her waist while his other hand rested on the djerik table waiting for Sketch's move. Aureki was still making bread, but slapping Echo's hand away from crisp-fried topato as he tried to distract her with a kiss. Ahsoka was next to her sister, laughing at something Rex had said. It must have been a nice flirt, because Rex was smiling that lazy, knowing half-grin. Sula and Saoha were on either side of Fives as he held peach and tickled her tummy; Sula peaceful, serene, the center of their family. Saoha sparkled, flirting with Djinn and Sketch – no wonder Sketch was losing against Jester. Keeli and Barin were playing with blocks in the corner; Barin thoughtfully stacking blocks for Keeli to knock over. Edge - _yes_ , though Crux - p _ut Edge in there too_. Edge was the bench on which Keeli was sitting while he waited for Barin to stack the blocks. _Add Chopper_ , thought Crux, _and Quad and Countdown and Djinn and Quad. Suu had to be there, as well as Cut. The younglings and the scouts. Kix, of course,_ Crux quietly populated the house in his mind with everyone at camp.

Then, because he could, he added brothers who had died in prison and brothers who had died in battle. Softly, he recited his remembrance … _Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum._ Trak he had teaching Jek and Shaeeah to play sabacc. Rylun was next to Djinn, delightedly learning to flirt with Saoha. Commander Kite was comparing scars with Chopper, Chopper would win, of course, but Kite wasn't going down easy. Calm was in the kitchen, behind Echo, filching one of the fried goodies and not getting his hand smacked by Aureki. So many brothers.

With tears in his eyes for shame, he imagined the padawan commander and Jedi general he had helped assassinate shortly before he had turned traitor. He made them guests in the small house; "Look," he was telling them. "See how wonderful it all is. So much laughter, so much love. This is my brother. This is my sister." He turned to catch the hand of a woman with fathomless eyes the brilliant turquoise of the thermal pool and hair as black as empty space. "This is my wife." Crux said. She smiled as she came forward and put her arms around him; surrounding him with love, surrounding him with warmth. "Her name is Kar'taylirne; we call her Kyr'am."

"How is he doing, Shy?"

"Not good, Suu. I think he's having hallucinations. He was mumbling in Mando'a, talking to someone. Naming brothers, some I recognized as dead, others I didn't know."

She bowed her head to her hands. "I think I'm going to bed."

Shy nodded. "I'll stay up a while, clean up a bit, throw more blankets in the dryer." He looked up into her face. "Would you like one? The rain makes the air moist and that makes it feel cold."

"Yes, please, Shy. I'm very cold these days. I feel so very cold."

* * *

**Crux**

Crux coughed and Kix didn't think he had the strength, but the violence of the cough lifted his shoulder up; twisting him, rolling him onto his side in the bed. Kix took the opportunity to slip his strong arm under Crux and hold him up. Crux's fever-sweated head fell limply against his chest.

"Sorry, Kix." He whispered weakly. "No strength."

"That's OK, Crux. Here take a sip." He held a cup to Crux's dry lips."

Crux sipped, his eyes shutting in pain or weakness or both; too tire to argue, too weak to say 'save it for someone who isn't dying'.

"Dying." His voice was calm and it wasn't a question.

Kix nodded; a grim, twisted frown on his face as he answered. "Yes, Crux. Your organs are shutting down. You'll just get sleepier, your pain will diminish," He saw Crux nod. "It already has gotten less, hasn't it?"

"Yes," Crux whispered; his head comfortable relaxing against Kix's shoulder. He wasn't cold anymore and that was a relief although his fingers still felt a bit stiff. Then Kix grabbed a hand and started massaging the palm with his thumb. Crux smiled. "Read minds?"

"All the best medics do, Crux." Kix gave him a smile. "Suu is sleeping in the next room. She's been trying to take care of you, but she didn't have the stamina. Shy," Kix paused. "Shy started coughing a couple of hours ago. But just the cough, not symptoms like yours. Sinker says Cut is weakening but, again, nothing like you. Saria is pretty sure that instead of getting infected pneumonically by face to face contact; you were infected septicemically."

Crux raised an eyebrow and Kix laughed at himself. "OK, no more big words, my brother." Crux smiled and closed his eyes, leaning against his brother, hearing the rhythmic heartbeat.

Crux shook his head softly. Why did he have so many questions, so many things to say when he had no strength to voice them?

Kix ran his hand over Crux's hair, holding his brother in his arms. Crux smiled, it felt good to be held. He'd never in his entire life been held like this.

"Don't get sick, Kix." Crux said weakly. "They need you." He shut his eyes. Whatever Kix had given him alleviated the cough and he felt better than he had since getting ill. Kix moved to let him back on the bed but Crux grabbed his shirt; the material twisting around his weak fingers.

"No. Like it here," he whispered, his eyes still closed.

Kix held him, rocking him slowly like he'd seen Sula rock peach; like Echo and, rarely, Rex rocked Barin; like most everyone rocked Keeli. Crux liked it, had a wish that he'd been born into a family, instead of a crèche, where someone might have rocked him in the short years he'd been a child.

Suu was there when Crux woke up again. She had one of his hands in hers, her fingers clasped tightly between his, her other hand stroking the back of his hand. His hands felt like parts of him again, not like some animal's claw that had been grafted onto his arms.

She was thin; she'd lost weight. He'd be thin, too. He couldn't remember his last meal. Then he remembered he was dying. He shouldn't be dying. He felt better than he had since moving into Jester's house. He shouldn't be dying, he'd only gone with Jester to see Cass Cjain three short days ago. He'd been planning on asking Jester if he could flirt with Cass after this quarantine. He shouldn't be dying.

"Hi, Suu." His voice was barely enough for her to hear, but she was paying attention.

"Good morning Crux. It's a beautiful day outside and I opened the window."

He smiled. "Then go, enjoy." It was another bare whisper.

"I don't want to go outside, Crux." Suddenly there were tears in her eyes. "I don't want you to leave us."

He looked at her with tears in his own eyes. He'd miss her, miss Saria. He'd miss all of them – his brothers and his sisters, the children and the younglings. He didn't want to die. He should have twenty or twenty-five more years. He would have found a woman like Suu or Saria who could flirt and laugh and had a heart so full of love. He would have married her, given her children, given her everything he was.

"It's not my choice," he replied weakly.

Suu wiped her eyes. "I know. It's not your choice, not what I want, not what anyone at camp wants." He smiled softly, his eyes drifting shut. They didn't want him to go. They loved him. He loved them.

"Other hand's jealous," he told her and she reached over his body, laying her head against his chest for a moment, then bringing his other hand closer. She held both his hands between hers.

Crux woke a final time. Suu was there, her fingers still holding his. Kix was also there, something in his hands. They kept fading in and out of his view, hidden by a white fog which seemed to cover his eyes, then part to allow a view of Suu or Kix more crystal clear and sharply alive than anything he'd ever known. There seemed to be more brothers behind her than just Shy. _Was half the camp here?_ They couldn't be, but he knew he saw his brothers. _Death delusions,_ he decided. But there were women interspersed in the group and they were beautiful. He saw one for him and she glanced into his face, her eyes sparkled in welcome. _Beautiful death delusions,_ he decided as he smiled at her.

Shy, standing behind Suu, was coughing and trying to be quiet about it. Crux wanted to laugh. _It's not bothering me, Shy_.

He felt divided into two parts; something heavy and physical and dizzy. The other part of him felt electric and … tense, like the excitement before battle. Prepared. Sparkling – like the woman's eyes or the first time he had tasted goldenfruit.

He squeezed Suu's hand as hard as he could; knowing he was weak, knowing she would barely feel it. She looked at him and he moved his lips. Suu leaned closer, the side of her face, her soft skin, touching him. She heard his words. They brought tears to her eyes. She kissed him softly on the cheek then spoke her own secret in his ear. He smiled, letting his eyes drift shut, moving his thumb on her hand. His brother Kix picked up his other hand, massaging the palm slowly with his thumb.

After a time his hands relaxed.

Neither Suu nor Kix let go of his fingers until life's warmth was long gone.

* * *

Cody

Cody sat at the big rock fingering the padawan beads that Barriss had given him. When she had given them, he wondered why he, and not Gree, had received the beads. Gree, at her side, had laughed. "Because I saw her knighted, o lesser mortal."

Cody gave a bittersweet smile as he tumbled those small beads in his fingers.

Those had been fighting words and he softly pooled the beads back into her slim, calloused hand and given her a kiss on her emerald cheek before attacking Gree. Not that Gree had been unprepared. Later, Gree had held him and her both in the afterglow of love.

"Gree my brother," Cody began. "My much-loved brother, I'm adding another name to the long list of men now under your command."

Edge

Edge had taken Keeli to the barn to play in his loft. With Suu in isolation, Shaeeah had been taken care of him for the past six days but Keeli was getting cranky at not seeing his momma. Edge had seen the crumbling of Shaeeah's temper over the days and her face had twisted in pain at the news of Crux's death. Edge had taken Keeli from her arms and given Shaeeah a quick hug around her shoulders.

"I'll take care of him for the next couple of days. You," His brows contracted in near confusion, not knowing Saleucami custom. "You grieve in your way." Keeli was asleep and absently Edge rubbed the toddler's back.

Crux had enjoyed coming to the med barn; usually to give Saria a massage and ask her questions about flirting. They'd all enjoyed the conversations, contributed to the questions. Edge usually hung over the side of the loft speaking the least but enjoying the discussion the most for observing it. Even Dare contributed to the discussion more than Edge, with a combination of hand signs and written notes on the data pad. Sometimes, later, Crux would crawl up into the loft with Edge and they'd talk about their wants for the future as they watched the double moons of Saleucami through the opening.

Edge wanted children. Everyone knew that. Crux had shyly admitted to Edge one night that he'd like children also but mostly he wanted a wife; a woman to be his equal and partner.

Sketch

Sketch had, with swift and knowing fingers, drawn the picture of a lovely woman in the dirt covering the duracrete of the cellblock. Cups had wanted it, had asked Sketch, described the girl and even offered some bread for it. Sketch never took anything in trade for his art; partially he was scared it might jinx him in getting caught but mostly because his art had been a gift to him and it only felt right to make it a gift to the others as well. They'd twisted his leg by then and the thought of losing his hands had him trembling at odd times. He hadn't had that fear since coming to Saleucami.

The picture had been a lovely portrait. Cups said it was a girl he had seen and talked with; though he never said where or under what circumstance. Cups was smiling over the picture when, almost simultaneously, came the noise of a fight and Cody's body sliding through the portrait. Cups, hit behind the knees, had been knocked to the ground. Angrily, he had jumped up, his fists ready. Someone, probably Chopper, had grabbed Sketch, pulling him away from the combatants.

"I am sick of your _kriffing_ orders," Crux was shouting at Cody and Cody was up with help from some of the men. Blood dribbled down his nose and there was surprise in his eyes. "Sick of you lording around like you had some sort of rank here. You are nothing but a …" Cody had hit him, of course. His big fist slammed into Crux's jaw and Crux staggered back.

Thacker smiled smugly from the other side of the fence, tapping his thigh with the prod he usually carried. Thacker was one of the new ones, not a brother. "Need a little help disciplining your troopers, commander?" Thacker's voice had been smug, oily and pleased and Sketch had frozen at how long he might have been standing there.

Sullenly, the prisoners lined up, Sketch leaning heavily against Chopper. Not a line of the picture remained as the prisoners shuffled into position.

"You." Thacker's prod flicked at Crux. "Report to the gate."

Crux did, tossing a sour frown at Cody. Cody had merely nodded then went in conference with Kix. In several hours they would drag Crux back into the gate.

Sketch looked at his hands. He owed Crux his hands. He owed all of them his hands.

Aureki

Aureki sighed. She really didn't feel like baking and she put the ingredients back and pushed away the bowls and pans. She looked out the kitchen door. Some of the men were in the back yard; busy with tasks or simply aimless as they walked or sat in the rain. She didn't understand that, but Echo had told her it was better than staying in the tents. Having been so preoccupied with her family and her pregnancy, she wouldn't have believed that she'd even noticed which brother was dead. Yet she did. It was the one who had flirted with her every day. They all flirted with her; in various ways and with various levels of skill. But this one had understood the basic foundation of flirting … love was possible everywhere.

Aureki pulled out the bowls and pans. No one had baked for the men since Suu had gone to Issuya that day, before the illness, before the quarantine. She pulled out the ingredients. Flirting was a gift between men and women; Crux had been a gift to all of them. _Torlk_ would be good to make; it was a sweetened bread; traditional for Shili funerals. Sweet – as life had been, salted with bitter tears. Aureki didn't even notice hers.

"Haruu," she whispered to herself. "Haruu, haruu."

Jester

Jester sighed as he sat cross-legged at the tent entrance. He'd check Cass Cjain's house later today. If Crux was dead, there was a good chance that she was as well. Right now he didn't feel like doing anything. He had another day in quarantine. He pushed the heels of his hands against his eyes. What if he got sick? What if he died? What if he never saw his children?

Rex & Barin

Rex sat, unmoving, at the campfire of the inner ring. Barin crawled into his lap quietly and leaned back against his chest. Absently Rex put his arms around the boy to give him a hug.

"Da, what happened to Crux?" Barin's voice was hesitant.

"He got very ill and he died."

"Is that why everyone is so sad?"

"Yes, Barin. We're all sad that Crux has died." Rex gently stroked his son's head, combing his fingers through his son's golden hair – so like his own.

"Is uncle Cut going to die?"

"I don't know." Rex shook his head. "I hope not. I hope no one else dies."

"Where do people go when they die, da."

"Far away, Barin. We say they march far away. They leave us memories and they leave their bodies behind. The important parts of them continue on, forging a path for us that follow." He repeated it in Mando'a. " _Nu kyr'adyc, shi taab'echaaj'la."_

Barin repeated the words, wrapping his lips hesitantly around the phrase. "I liked Crux, da. He let me ride his shoulders sometimes."

"Crux was a good brother, Barin. A good man." Rex held Barin as the boy buried his face in Rex's shoulder to hide his tears. "Do you want to say daily remembrance for him?" Rex asked hesitantly. Barin was young, possibly too young.

"You say that every day, don't you?" Barin sniffled and wiped his nose with the back of his hand.

Rex nodded. "Every day for the rest of your life. So you can remember when you're old, that a man name Crux let you ride his shoulders.

Barin thought a moment then nodded his head. "I'd like to remember him, da. Will you help me do that?"

"Yes, Barin. I'll help you. The words to say are _Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum_." Rex said them slowly and Barin repeated them. "Then you add his name and maybe a sentence about him. Most importantly, you have to remember him. You have to think of him. What would you say about Crux?"

"That he carried me on his back and sometimes we rolled down the hill." Barin puckered his lips in deep thought and closed his eyes. " _Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum._ I remember you Crux. You put me on your back and ran and sometimes we rolled down the hill and played chase." Tears rolled down the boy's face.

Rex held him close to his chest. "That's good Barin."

 _Stay away, Ahsoka_. He thought hard; as if he thought hard enough she could hear him through the Force. It had never worked before, but that didn't stop him. _I'll take care of Barin with my life; you know I will. We will take care of each other. Please, my love and life; please stay away._

Kayl

Kayl didn't remember coming to Saleucami. He remembered the beating he'd taken in prison. He remembered the flare of pain. He remembered dying. He remembered speaking with an angel. "Damn, Crux. I hope an angel grabs your hand."

Jek

Jek was behind the nuna pens, his back against the fencing. His arms hugged his pulled up knees tightly. "You're not dead, Crux. It isn't fair," he muttered. He swallowed a heavy lump in his throat. "I hate you, Crux!" Jek sniffled and pushed his face to his knees, his entire body as small as he could make it.

Crux couldn't be dead. If Crux was dead then dad could die.

Cut & Sinker

Sinker held the comm bracelet for Cut. He was too weak to hold it himself, his hands fisted into cramps. His shivers usually came late at night. Sinker had appreciated the medical supplies of Saria's apartment but they were mostly gone now. He bowed his head, trying to not listen to Suu's words. They ran everywhere, so much into the past; "Cut, remember when…". They ran into the future as well and Sinker was surprised at how much Cut loved that; how his eyes smiled and his face relaxed as Suu made plans. Cut had closed his eyes, tears of joy glistening in their corners, as Suu told him about Shaeeah's wedding.

He'd have to make a food run as well. He'd go tonight, taking his blaster. He hoped he'd returned. For Cut, certainly. Cut wouldn't survive without him. For himself as well, he wanted, so much, to hear more of Suu's plans.

Sinker realized their conversation was over and Cut was looking at him oddly.

"Amazing, isn't it?" Cut's voice was a whisper that Sinker barely hears. "It takes death to plan for the future."

Chopper

When Crux had first come to prison to share a cell with Chopper, Chopper had hated him. He'd been full of hate the first year and felt it fully justified. He'd been in prison the longest and felt betrayed by the 501st and Rex; at least until Kix had told him that Rex had been a traitor almost as long as Chopper. But that hadn't been until the second year, so Chopper had hated.

Chopper remembered the nightmares. They were always some variation of Order 66. The night after Crux's arrival, Chopper'd had a bad one. The tall, black-cloaked figure pulled out his living heart to feed to Rex. There was no sense to nightmares, there never was and he had woken up shaking in terror with Crux's hand barely touching his own. Instinctively, Chopper had grabbed that hand, feeling human warmth, while his labored breathing became more normal.

"Keep it quiet," yelled someone and Chopper knew he'd been moaning in the nightmare. Something that sounded all too much like something else.

"Just a nightmare," called out Crux.

"Need anything?" had asked Cody from a few cells down and Crux had looked at Chopper who shook his head.

"No, sir. I'll be ok." Crux called out again.

"Not with Chopper." An unknown voice and some laughter.

Flushed at the comment, Chopper got up, relieved himself, washed his hands and face and sat back down on his bunk. All without saying a word. Crux had taken the upper rack and was watching Chopper.

"Guy in my squad had nightmares." He said low enough not to be heard by the rest of the cells. "Pretty much every night."

Chopper frowned, his eyes looking beyond the cell. Then he nodded.

"Nightmares in here," Crux tapped his head and Chopper looked at him. "We can wake up from. They are nothing compared to the nightmares out there." Chopper had seen truth in brown eyes that had once matched his own.

"Thanks, Crux," whispered Chopper. "For a little bit of truth when I needed it."

Boil & Numa

Boil came behind Numa. He heard her unevenly drawn breath, the wetness in her throat. He wasn't walking quietly so he knew she heard him; even so, there was a little jerk of her shoulders as he put his arms around her and drew her into himself. She let herself melt into him like she was a child and her tears were free to mingle with the rain on her face. After a while she turned, surprised by the tears on Boil's face.

"Does it always hurt so much, Boil?"

"Always, Numa," he replied, his breath warm on her neck. "Most of the time in the past we couldn't let tears flow or mourn our fallen brothers until long after battle ; but it always hurts."

"Where is Waxer?"

"He always mourns alone, Numa."

"Why?"

"I don't know, Numa. I've never been brave enough to ask."

Waxer

At the news that Crux was dead, Waxer had shot one look at Boil then moved off at a lope into the rain. Boil knew better than to follow. Waxer moved toward the thermal pool, into the wide-mouth cave. He sat there, alone, his back against the smooth surface of the cave wall.

Waxer bowed his head. _It wasn't Boil. It wasn't Numa._ Sometimes he wondered at the wild rush of emotion whenever one of his brothers died. But there was always that thought. _It wasn't Boil. It wasn't Numa._ What kind of wicked man was he to rejoice at someone's death? He had liked Crux, even felt brotherly pride when he'd been learning to flirt. He'd laughed with Crux, played Shaeeah's evening games with him and talked while they waited in the breakfast line.

Waxer felt sad, but over the sadness was that one thought of joy. _It wasn't Boil. It wasn't Numa._ Waxer cried; not sure if it was for Crux or the wretched creature that was himself.

Backup

Crux had died a bad death. It hadn't happened in battle. Crux had died of some fever; had laid his body in a soft bed and given up. Coward.

Shy

Shy tried not to think about Crux. Crux was dead and Shy might follow. But sometimes when he coughed, he thought he heard Crux's voice speaking to him. "It's not that bad, Shy."

Saria & Cody

"I .. I heard about Crux." Saria's chin wobbled and tears streaked down her face. She pushed her hands to her eyes. "He just wanted to flirt and I liked him and … and …he never even got really kissed."

Cody, sitting in the wet grass at the back door, his elbows on his knees, wished he could put his arm around her shoulders and comfort her. "Kix says he died smiling; says he told Suu something that seemed important to him. A lot of my other men didn't get that much." Cody glanced down at the soft ground. Already there was new growth. He skimmed his palm over the grass, letting his tickle his hand. In his mind he remembered others who had died under his command; when he'd been commander, when he'd been a marshal commander, when he'd been a prisoner. He remembered them all; their stories as well as their names.

"And Shy is ill. Suu and Kix have to stay quarantined for three more days, Jester for another day." Saria turned toward Cody, wiping her eyes. "What's to be done with him?"

"Do you mean his body?" That hadn't been much of a problem with his other men. Kamino wanted corpses returned. Studies, he supposed. "I wanted to ask you if we should incinerate it because of the disease. It would be a big pyre and might attract drifters." Cody tilted his head as he watched her think. Her green eyes moved back and forth while her lips moved as if whispering. "Otherwise, we'd like to bury him by the big rock." He gave her a small smile. "It seems to be a popular place to go and simply be alone. Perhaps they'd enjoy his company."

She tucked her face back into her hands as she thought, but she nodded. "Burial will be ok. There's no need to burn the body." Her face was hot, her eyes burned and her throat held a big lump that threatened to choke her."

"It's okay to cry, Saria. We have our remembrance and will add him. But you mourn differently; you mourn potential as well as the man and that's something most clones can't readily identify. Crux was proud of being a trooper and he was proud when he turned traitor," Cody smiled. "And he was proud that he had learned how to flirt."

"I want to know about him," she told Cody. "I want to know everything about him; the planets he's been on, how he got his scars, what he liked to eat. I want to know how he got his name and his favorite music and his first battle. Ask Sketch to draw a picture of him for me." Again, she dropped her face into her hands and this time could not hold back the choking tears.

"Crux came out of Kamino and was assigned as infantry. His designation was CT 81-6843. His squad gave him his name when, as a sergeant, he disagree with another sergeant and led his men through a mined field without a single casualty. He said 'the crux of the matter was knowing the field was mined but not knowing what the other path held'.

Saria chuckled, her eyes still wet with tears. "Better the evil you know…"

Cody nodded, continuing with everything he had learned about Crux in prison.

Kix

Crux's body was laid out on a quilt on the table. Both Suu and Shy had asked if they could help. Kix merely shook his head.

"This is my responsibility and I'd like privacy." Shy had coughed and nodded, leaving the doorway for a bed. Suu had looked at Kix oddly.

"Among my people, we bath the dead with fine oil and dress them in their finest clothes." She paused. "I could…"

"No, Suu. This is my own ritual." Kix bowed his head, already his eyes were tearing. "I talk to him, tell him how much he'll be missed, things like that."

Suu nodded. "He knows, but tell him again that we love him." She shut the door behind her.

Kix looked into Crux's face and said the first thing he always said to one of his dead brothers. "I'm sorry, Crux," he whispered. "I'm so sorry I couldn't help you."


	10. Drifters

Djinn stilled and listened. He heard nothing; he looked at Riven who gave a small signal with his hand. _Nothing_. Djinn frowned, glancing at each darkened shadow. She was good. Physically he did nothing except listen, paying attention to the small sounds of the night. It was Riven's turn. They were trying to drive her towards the thermal pool where there were fewer trees for her hide behind.

Silently, Riven moved, seeming to vanish into the thin underbrush of Saleucami's forest. There was only one moon out tonight and not even full. The forest was about as dark as Djinn had ever seen it. Carefully, he moved back. The leaves of the bush draped over his shoulders, softly tickling his ash-blackened skin. His back touched the trunk of the tree and he spun around it, slowly to make no noise.

But there was noise, coming from the direction Riven had gone. It was louder than Riven. As quickly as he could move silently, Djinn followed the noise. It was getting louder and he could make out voices.

 _Osik, drifters_ , he thought. Numa was probably around, attracted by the noise as well. She'd been told to not interfere with any drifters, to move back to outer ring and let some brothers know. These were the first drifters in weeks, the first drifters since the quarantine, the first since Crux had died and Shy had begun coughing and shivering with bone-deep chills.

"Guntrei, I'm cold. When are we going to stop?" It was a man's voice; complaining, whining, coughing.

"Soon, Tajin, soon. I'll make us a nice fire and we can rest." The second man's voice was stronger, but he also broke into a fit of coughs a few seconds after his words.

 _As if drifters weren't bad enough, these were infected drifters._ He glanced at Riven who had a pale, sick frown on his face and Djinn knew his expression was no better. They'd buried Crux two days ago.

Riven made a gesture with his hand. Djinn nodded and moved back then circled the drifters. He could tell there were three. Though the third man hadn't spoken audibly, he was muttering angrily.  They were making too much noise to be quiet.

Djinn was barely in position when Riven stepped out in front of the group.

"I'm sorry, you're trespassing. You'll have to go back." Riven's voice was calm, polite and what happened next was up to the drifters.

"We're not going back." Said one of them; not the muttering one and not the whiny one. Their apparent leader, Guntrei, spoke. "They're dying back there."

"Yes, Guntrei, we know." Riven's voice was still polite, reasonable. "But you're already ill and we won't have that spread into our home."

"It's just rainy season flu," argued Guntrei as he coughed into his elbow and shivered.

"No," said Riven. "You've got the chills as well as the cough. That's red shadow virus."

Guntrei they might have convinced. Djinn could see it in the man's stance, the way his shoulders dropped slightly. Guntrei might have turned away, taking Tajin with him. Guntrei seemed a reasonable man.

"Make us," shouted muttering man as he pulled out a blaster on Riven and that caused Guntrei to pull his own. Djinn moved swiftly and smoothly directly behind the first man, grasped his head and twisted. The man was dead before he knew it, dead before he pulled the trigger, dead before he hit the ground.

Riven had moved in to grapple with Guntrei who glanced in Djinn's direction to see the falling body. Guntrei's eyes opened wide and white then he ran. He wasn't fast enough to outrun the blaster now in Djinn's hand.

The last man fell to his knees, his cramped, trembling hands in front of him, begging to live.  Sadly, he was already a dead man.

Riven grabbed mumbling man's body and slung it over his shoulders then headed away from the farm and its inhabitants.

Djinn twisted his lips. Shooting unarmed civilians was not something he thought he could do.

"This is not a war in which we can take prisoners." Numa's regretful voice came on the breeze. Djinn still didn't know where she was but he knew she was right and he nodded.

"Shut your eyes, Tajin." Djinn said softly. gently.

Tajin, sobbing, shivering and coughing, did so and Djinn set the blaster on the ground. As with mumbling man, Tajin was dead before he knew it. It was kinder than a blaster, thought Djinn.

"We'll come back and get that one," said Djinn, nodding his head toward Guntrei's body.

"Yes, Djinn." Her voice came on the breeze and Djinn still didn't know where she was.

"Make sure no one stumbles on this body. There're only two cots in the isolation tent. One for me, one for Riven. No room for anyone else in isolation." He didn't mention Crux's death or Shy's illness or that they'd be sleeping in the tent until they actually showed indications of being ill. None of that needed to be mentioned.

"I'll make sure." Her voice was low and Djinn knew she wouldn't let anyone near the body. He stood at Tajin's body for a moment, still in the evening coolness. He wished he could tell her how it had been before he's deserted; when he been CT-25-0663. When he'd been just a replaceable clone. When he looked at the dead men on a battlefield and didn't know if it had been him or his brothers who had died. When no one cared.

"I know you will, Numa. Thank you." He didn't know if she understood what the gratitude was for, but it was heartfelt. "I guess it's a tie then," he said as he hefted the body that had once been Tajin onto his shoulders.

"I don't think so, Djinn. You'll see when you get to some light. Check your backs." Now he could pinpoint the area where she was.

Djinn shook his head and gave a soft curse with a half-grin. She was very good. He had no doubt he'd see a red mark on Riven, no doubt that Riven would see Numa's mark on him. He hoped it wouldn't be on his chest. She'd done that to Backup the one time he had played Scout's chase; she'd marked his chest with a bright red 'besh'.

Numa watched him go, the load on his shoulders slowing him down no more than Riven's. They were taking the bodies away; probably most of the-way back to Issuya. Waxer's brothers never did anything by half-measures. She had tears in her eyes.


	11. Scholarly Thinking

Kix was sitting in the barn alone, his elbows on his knees and his hands nervously rubbing together. Saria walked in and sat opposite him, five meters away. Outside the barn, Jester's voice shouted his impotent rage at her moving among his possibly infected brothers. Kix glanced at her, a worried look on his face. He lifted one hand to his lips and began chewing his thumbnail.

"How are they doing?" Her voice was soft but carried through the distance between them.

"You shouldn't be here, Saria. I thought you decided that the pregnant women would be isolated." He glanced down. "Please go back, Saria. We don't want to chance losing your baby or losing you."

"I need to know how they're doing, Kix. I won't get close to you."

He frowned; she was too close already. He shuffled his chair further away from her until it hit the wall.

"You should have stayed in the house." He accused, sighed and dropped his head. "They're both infected. I have to be by now.  Shy is tolerating it better than Crux.  It isn't infecting him as quickly, but that's still not good. Suu hasn't shown any symptoms. I wanted her to go to isolation, but she's says she's not leaving Shy." His face twisted, ."Now Djinn and Riven are ill. Saria, we have to do something. We can't…"

She shook her head, tears in her eyes. "There's nothing."

Somewhere in the back of his mind was the thought that if he didn't look at her, she couldn't get infected. He stared at the ground as he spoke. "Shy is shivering and his fingers are cramping. Djinn is deep in the coughing phase. Riven has a headache. For a while he complained that it was just due to taking care of Djinn and living in the tent; not being able to sleep all night because of Djinn's coughing. At some point, he shivered. When he saw that I had noticed, he admitted having chills. I moved them both into the house with Suu, me and Shy. I'm just back for some supplies."

"And solitude," she whispered, but he still heard her soft sigh.  He glanced and saw her put her face in her hands. "They've updated the fatality rate. It's at eighty percent now." She said between her fingers.

"Saria," he wanted to comfort her in some way. He wanted to reach out his hands and hold her. They were family now. He was her apprentice. He clasped his hands together. He wasn't showing any symptoms yet, but he was infected. He had to be.

There was a long moment of silence, Kix racing through his mind to find something to say to her. Then he froze, wondering if what had just happened was like scholarly thinking instead of flash training or programming. Bringing together different facts and thoughts to form a unified thought rather than the linear procession of duties instilled by programming or the simple answers provided by flash training.

"Saria," Kix asked slowly. "What is the relation of red shadow virus to the other shadow viruses? If someone has had one of the other viruses would they be immune to other variants?"

"Not all, but some," she answered, seeing an odd expression on his face as he stared at the wooden floor.

"Blue shadow virus?" he asked, the odd look frozen on his face.

"That's been eradicated, but in shadow viruses, the more virulent forms often confer immunity to less virulent forms."

Kix wanted to keep his thoughts linear so he wouldn't miss anything, but everything he knew and understood piled in his mind all at once, all together.

"And blue shadow virus was the most virulent form?" He asked, though he knew. She nodded and he continued. "Would it be possible to make a vaccine from someone who'd had the virus before?"

Again she nodded. "It's possible, but I don't think we have the equipment."

"Would that help Shy, Riven and Djinn? Cut? Since they're already sick?" He looked up from the ground, looking at her.

"I don't know. It would depend, mostly, on how strong the patient is. How fast the antibodies started working."

He opened his lips, closed them and then opened them again. "It's highly classified but Rex and Jesse have both had blue shadow virus. They were cured with reeksa root." He rubbed his fingers. "Does that make a difference?"

"No. If they've had the disease, then they have antibodies for it." She looked at him with wide eyes. "Kix, are you giving me hope?"

Kix simply kept talking, wanting to get all of his thoughts out before they could vanish. "Since we're all genetically identical, you wouldn't even have to purify the blood or filter antibodies. It could even be just blood to blood contact. Couldn't it? Just a …" his shoulders shrugged. "Just a small transfusion. It could work, couldn't it Saria? Tell me, my thinking is correct. Tell me it could work." Kix licked his lips, his eyes pleading with her.  "Battlefield medicine is messy.  There's no sterile technique."  He shrugged with a quick chuckle.  "I've been bled on by Rex and Jesse even with my own wounds. Tell me it's why I'm not sick."

"Oh, Kix."  He saw the pain for him and his vode in her eyes, then she was stiff in her seat.  Her own eyes flicked back and forth, her lips moving, as she thought and remembered. Slowly she nodded, eyes still focused somewhere else. "It could work, Kix." She brought her eyes to his face. "Make it about 50cc for the men who don't show signs of infection, 100 for Shy, Djinn and Riven." She shook her head. "No, try Shy and Djinn first; see if there's an improvement. Then Riven, unless he deteriorates rapidly. If it works on them, then we'll do all the men. Even if it works on just one man, we'll immunize all the men. I'll try to think of how to purify it and make it a vaccine for the rest of us."

"Don't do that without talking to Cody." Kix frowned, there were protocols she should be aware of. Cody would tell her. "And Cut?"

Saria shook her head. "He's not here and we can't get into town."

Kix laughed. "That," he smiled at her, "will be the least of our problems. Go on back to the house."

She smiled back. "When I walked out of the house, I told them not to let me back in."

"The porch then," ordered Kix absently. "You're quarantined to the porch. When it rains, you deserve to get wet and I hope Jester yells at you the entire day for leaving the house." He stood as she moved out the door. "I've got things to do but I'll probably need to consult with you." He grinned, there was hope.

Kix watched as Jester escorted her down toward the house, making sure none of the men came within five meters of her. She seemed to listen calmly to his tirade though Jester shook with anger. He'd just come out of a three-day quarantine the day before Djinn and Riven met the drifters. He was so obviously livid as he walked more than five meters from her, glaring at anyone coming within fifty paces of her.

Kix grabbed a medkit and packed it with a couple of 100 cc syringe, several smaller syringes, needles of varying sizes and some sweet fluid replacement. He'd grab the first one he came to, Rex or Jesse, then go directly to Jester's house.


	12. River of Red

**River of Red**

Kix paused a moment, thinking. Rex would probably be sparring now. Jesse was usually harder to find, though lately he'd been hanging around Boil and Waxer. He spied Echo and ran toward him.

"Hey, Echo, where's Rex or Jesse?"

"Rex, camp, Jesse, don't know. Why?" Echo glanced up to see Kix lope off toward the inner ring camp.

Rex was there, laughingly calling for mercy as Barin climbed over him, tickling him.

"Rex, give me a vein," commanded Kix as he popped open the kit. Rex slowly sat up, Barin on his lap. Barin had already learned that Uncle Kix could command anyone and was quiet.

As Kix popped a vacuum tube onto the syringe, Rex began making a fist and pulled an antiseptic swab from the kit. They'd done this often enough on the battlefield. Barin's eyes grew wide.

"What's he going to do, da?" He asked in a small voice.

"Take some of my blood, Barin."

Kix quick-tied the strap and tapped the inside of Rex's elbow.

"Why?" The perennial question from a child and Rex looked at Kix for the answer.

"Because, Barin, your father once had an illness very similar to the illness we're all worried about right now." He touched Rex's inner arm, stroking to feel the beat. It was easier without the armor constricting the arms, without the bodysuit material to compensate for. "Ah yes, river of red," he murmured, remembering battlefield transfusions. Gently he slid the needle under the skin and blood started filling the tube. "And maybe, we can use his blood to make sure Cut, Shy, Djinn and Riven get better."

Rex gave a wordless nod and a sigh of hope.

"Does it hurt?" came the quiet voice as Barin watched the syringe fill.

Kix switched out the filled tube for a second. He'd take 300cc from Rex. That should be sufficient.

"Kix is very good, Barin. He almost never hurts anyone and when he does hurt someone," Rex grinned. "It's because they didn't do what he said."

Kix undid the strap and switched to the final tube. "Thanks, captain," he said absently. Then to Barin, "Most of the time he didn't listen to me until it hurt or he was too wounded to put up much fight." Kix handed Rex the sweetened drink pouch, then gave a start, his head jerking up. "That's why I'm not infected."

"No sterility on the battlefield?" Rex bit open the pouch squeezing the liquid into his mouth. "Holding me back when I wanted to check out my men or the lay of the land." He gave a wry grin. He'd bled on Kix more times than he could count; more times than he probably actually was aware of.

"None." Kix stood. "I'm going to Jester's. Saria's isolated on the front porch. She'll be able to explain it." He pulled the last syringe, withdrew the needle and handed Barin an adhesive band. "Put this on your dad, Barin, so he won't lose a drop of blood." Both men watched, smiling, as Barin carefully applied the small band.

"Good job, Barin," said Kix then he spoke again, this time to Rex. "I'll be staying the night with Djinn and Riven." Kix stood as Rex sucked down the drink. "Rex, if this works we'll need to get it to Cut. You and Cody better make plans for getting into and out of Issuya." Then he was running to Jester's.

* * *

**Hope**

Rex stood and reached out for his son's hand which slid into his own, the small fingers curling around the larger ones. "Come on, Barin. We need to find Cody."

"Cut's in town, isn't he? I thought it was dangerous to go into town." Barin had to take two steps for every one of Rex's long strides; he was running to Rex's quick walk. Suddenly Rex noticed that.

"Do you want to climb on my back, Barin?" he asked. "I'll run then." Barin's face lit up and Rex knelt so Barin could clamber up, helping his son onto his back with a strong arm.

"Cut's family, Barin. We always help family, if we can." Rex broke into a quicker pace. Barin's arms were clasped around his shoulders, hands holding tight around each wrist instead of clutched around Rex's neck. Rex knew he had Crux to thank and wondered how much Crux had carried Barin on his back. It obviously hadn't been just several times.

"Because we love them?" asked Barin in the plain-speaking manner of a child.

"Yes, Barin. Because we love them." Rex realized his heart was growing by leaps and bounds; far beyond what he had ever thought himself capable of, far beyond what he'd been capable of only half a year ago.

"I miss my mamas." Barin's voice was soft.

"I know, Barin. I miss them too. Tonight, maybe we can go to the back porch and ask if Aureki will tell us a bedtime story from the door way."

"No," said Barin sadly. "Cause I'd want a hug and a kiss."

"Me too, Barin. Me too." Gingerly, Rex patted Barin's hands crossed on his chest.

* * * * * * * * * *

Cody was sparring with Countdown within a ring of brothers. Even Sketch was there, sitting on a boulder with Chopper at his side, showing a wrist hold to Dare. Dare was thin, thinner than he'd been when they'd escaped. Rex hoped Saria would be able to do the step down surgery soon. He needed to be able to eat.

"Cody," Rex gestured. "Important info." Rex glanced at the men. "For everyone."

Cody stepped back, out of Countdown's reach. "Bad news?" he asked. All the news had been bad lately.

Rex shook his head. "Riven and Djinn are both showing symptoms. Shy's getting worse."

"I thought you said it wasn't bad news," quipped Cody darkly.

"Kix and Saria thought of something." He sat next to Sketch and let Barin slide from his back. "They've taken some blood from me because I've had one of the shadow viruses. So has Jesse. Kix is going to inoculate the men at Jester's."

"Will it work?" Chopper's voice and Rex smiled to hear it. Chopper was no longer a trooper, but a civilian, all thoughts of relative rank lost to him. Cody nodded at the question as well. There were murmurs from the ring of men.

"Kix isn't sure," Rex began, "but he was medic for the 501st for three years. He probably has as much of my blood in him as I do." Rex looked into Cody's eyes. "And he hasn't shown any symptoms in spite of caring for Crux,  In spite of caring for the others."

"That is good news, Rex." Cody nodded thoughtfully. "It gives us hope."

Sketch chuckled. "You're going to have to talk with Saria. She'll be want to make a vaccine for everyone."

"She can't," replied Cody and Rex simultaneously.

"Then you'd better tell her why." Sketch carefully stood, steadying himself with his crutches, Chopper beside him.

"I'll talk with her." Cody dusted his hands on his pants.

"There's one more thing." Rex looked up at Cody. "We'll need to plan a small man infiltration of Issuya to inoculate Cut and Sinker.  We need to get both of them out of Issuya."

* * * * * * * * * *

Rex stood in the back yard, the air filled with the soft mist of an earlier rain. Aureki came to the door and sat on the bench. Her belly was round and he could see her shirt tugging up, revealing a band of flesh where his new child grew.

"Hello, second wife." Rex smiled at her. "We miss you. Barin misses bedtime stories, hugs and kisses."

"And you, Rex? What do you miss?" She asked playfully.

"I miss bedtime stories, hugs and kisses also." He paused then continued. "I miss holding you. I can see the child in you grow and I want, so badly, simply to hold my hands to your belly and feel this child move. I miss having you cook for us, making a small treat, just for our family. I miss sitting in the grass at breakfast or dinner with you and having your body against mine while we discuss…"

"Deep philosophy?" Her eyes twinkled in humor and her nose scrunched up as she grinned.

He laughed. "Yes, deep philosophy and watching Barin and making patterns out of clouds.

"I miss you, second husband. I miss your strong arms around me, I miss watching you and the other men fight because you are almost always the winner and always the best looking." She blushed. "Don't tell first husband I said that."

Rex laughed. "He knows, second wife."

She blushed, the patterns on her face brighter in contrast to her deep amber skin. "I miss cooking for you, thinking of a small treat you might like. I also miss discussion of deep philosophy. I miss the scent of you and Echo in my bed."

"Are you scared." Rex frowned. He didn't want his family to be scared. Barin wasn't, he was a child with unconditional faith in his fathers. Aureki was an adult, knowledgeable about human frailties and failures. "Echo and I are doing our best."

"I know." She smiled softly and tilted her head. "I am afraid, Rex, but not for myself."

"The same, Aureki. I am afraid, but not for myself."

* * *

 

****Wakefulness** **

He gave Shy and Djinn each 100cc of Rex's blood and monitored them through the night. They seemed better, but Kix couldn't tell how much of that was merely wishful thinking. As Riven started shivering and coughing constantly in the early morning, Kix gave him the remainder of Rex's blood and sat by the bed. He dozed in a fairly comfortable chair he had pulled in from the living room. He had checked on Shy; Suu had been by his side in the other room, softly running her fingers through his hair and bringing him warmed blankets as he shivered.

"Kix." Someone called his name from a great distance and he blinked his eyes several times before his head started dropping again.

"Kix," and Kix woke because that was Riven.

Riven smiled, "Go see what the commander wants."

"Coming, sir," yelled Kix as he stood, wincing at how loud his voice sounded. He took a detour to check on the other two men. Both Shy and Djinn were asleep; neither shivering nor coughing. Djinn had kicked off his cover and Shy had his arm protectively around a sleeping Suu. There were tear streaks on her cheeks; probably for Cut. She would think they couldn't get to him any more than Saria had thought it was possible. They were all asleep and he was glad his voice wasn't as loud as it had seemed.

"Sir," said Kix as he opened the door and stood at parade rest on the porch. Cody was at the proper distance.

Cody smiled. "I thought we said no 'sir'-ing around camp."

"It's my choice and, right now, authority needs to be properly asserted. Epidemics are not a time for democracy."

Cody nodded. "How are the men? Does your plan appear to be working."

Kix nodded, trembling slightly. "I checked them when you yelled for me. Riven was deep in the coughing phase last night and there was the start of liquid in his lungs; he's not coughing anymore and seems better." A quick smile flowed over Kix's face. "He was awake and in a good mood. Djinn is still asleep, but it's a normal sleep. Last night he started going into the coughing phase so I gave him 100 cc of Rex. This morning, no coughing, no shivers. Shy also is better. I'll have to do a few more tests to make sure, but it seems to be working."

Cody nodded. "You did good, Kix."

"No, sir." Kix lowered his head. "I didn't save Crux. He didn't have to die if only I'd …."

"Kix," Cody's voice interrupted kindly and Kix squatted, his back against the door, his head skyward, facing the soft clouds and the blue sky.

Cody continued speaking. "Kix, we all make mistakes. We are not omniscient."

"My mistakes killed a brother." Kix's voice was hard and unforgiving.

"And mine didn't?" asked Cody "I can name every brother who died under my command. Every man who died for my mistakes. I'll let you know right now, Kix. I've killed a lot more brothers than you."

"But…" Kix began, staring at Cody.

"We all make mistakes, Kix. We can only forgive ourselves and move on. Otherwise we become frozen, afraid to make any decisions and we can't help if we're paralyzed in fear."

Kix bowed his head, his lips pursed tightly together. Then he looked at Cody. "But, it ..." Kix grimaced, all the agony of his failures showing in his face.

"I know, Kix. I've seen how much you take someone's death personally. How you blamed yourself for every death that happened in prison."

"If I'd had even just a medpac…"

"You didn't Kix." Cody bowed his head. "You didn't have anything and that was your torture. They tortured Jesse with his tattoo; Sketch with his leg, they tried torturing Chopper with solitary, Riposte with rape. They tortured me by torturing my men anytime I didn't give them information."

"You didn't have any information, sir."

"They knew that, Kix. They didn't care." Cody said softly. "They knew you could do miracles with a medpac, that's why they didn't give you one. Even without it, you still saved men; Sketch, Col, Countdown, Edge, Leven. Me."

He saw Kix's consider that, slowly stand and look Cody in his eyes.

"You did good, Kix. Saria says you were the one who put all the pieces together."

Kix gave a slight grin. "It was scholarly thinking," he said. "It had to have been because suddenly everything I knew; Rex's and Jesse's bout with blue shadow virus, what Saria had told me about how shadow viruses are related, about our genetic identicalness." He lifted his arms to look into his palms, then he looked into Cody's eyes. "It all just came crashing into my head; leaving no room for anything else and I _knew_."

There was noise in the kitchen by the door and both Cody and Kix glanced in that direction; Cody through the window and Kix through the doorway.

It was Riven, his hair still wet and a towel over his shoulders, standing at the stove, a soft sizzle coming from the metal plate. He gave a lop-sided smile to both Kix and Cody. "I appreciate everything you did, Kix, and I'll never be able to pay you back, vod." He glanced down at his hands, stirring something in a bowl. "But I am starving!" He flashed them both a full grin. "I'm going to try frybread and egg. You're both welcome to join me."

"No," said Kix, regret in his voice. "We should still be under quarantine." He turned to Cody with a frown on his face. "I need to speak with Rex. Yesterday, when I got his blood, I didn't think he'd be with Barin and I thought of Barin as part of him." Kix ducked his head. "It's my mistake," he said softly, his lower lip quivering. "If Barin becomes ill..."

"Rex though of that later, Kix." Cody wanted to put his hand on Kix's shoulder, reassure him. "He asked Barin where he wanted to be and Barin chose the pool." He laughed softly. "Didn't make everyone happy; most of the men have been going down there simply to soak in the hot water even if it is rainy season. Most everyone else knows to stay away from us men who were sparring when Rex told us. Only those men can use the pool now. The scouts have taken Numa, Shaeeah and Jek off to the desert while Edge will be watching Keeli."

Kix rubbed his face with his hands. "I guess I can go to the pool, too. Keep an eye on Barin." He frowned. "Let Rex beat me to bloody sorrow if he wants."

Cody shook his head. "That's unlikely. Even if Barin gets ill, Rex will blame himself."

"But I was the one too much in a hurry. It's my fault if the boy gets ill."

"Then maybe you can try to convince Rex of that. Because if Barin gets ill." Cody pressed his lips together into a thin, white line. Kix, knowing what he was going to say, closed his eyes. "If Barin dies, Rex will simply close himself off. He'll become something like the new brothers. Hard and heartdead."

* * *

**Genetics**

Saria, I've heard that you're thinking about trying to make a vaccine from Rex and Jesse's blood." Cody set five meters away, one hand clasping his other wrist, his arms a circle on his knees.

"Yes, that would solve …" She nodded and her hands lifted as though to explain without words.

"No, it wouldn't." Uncharacteristically, he cut her sentence short.

"But," she looked at him, surprise in her green eyes.

"Listen to me, Saria." His voice was slightly harder than when he normally spoke to her or one of the other women. He knew you couldn't use the same voice for women that you could use for hard men who'd been troopers and prisoners but he had to emphasize this. "You cannot use our blood to make a vaccine. There isn't a man here who will allow it if you asked. They can't explain because of Kamino inhibitors but I can."  He stared at the ground between his feet and gave a breathy snort of disgust.  "It's called 'command privilege'."  He paused at that thought a moment then spoke again, "You know we were created, genetically modified from the template."

"I know that, Cody." Her voice was soft, softer than usual as though to compensate for his hardness.

"But you don't understand the implications." Cody let his voice mellow to its normal tone. "We were created, according to specifications in our contract. The Rights of Sentience don't apply to us because we are a commodity; a trademarked product created to specifications."

Her brows furrowed, creating two parallel lines between them. He could see she still didn't understand. He sighed. It was hard enough to talk about classified information to his brothers. Drill programming was giving him a headache and he had barely started telling her. "Most clones don't know this except as general guidelines and prohibitions on what we can or cannot do. Kix, as medic, knows that he cannot permit blood transfusions from clone to non-clone. He has only a vague understanding of why. Our _bodies_ are trademarked. Our _blood_ is trademarked. Our _genes_ are trademarked."

"What does that mean, Cody?" She asked "You're trying to tell me something in a roundabout way and it's not working."

"Throughout our bodies, in the autosomes, are random genetic … strings that are toxic inside other species." Cody almost hissed through his teeth. Just saying the words made his head feel as though it had been hit against the steel walls of his prison cell. His head throbbed and he wondered if he'd have an aneurysm.  He'd heard it could happen.

She frowned. "Surely they can be filtered out?" Her hand unconsciously reached out to offer comfort to his grimace of pain.

"Maybe. I don't know. I don't want to chance it. The Kaminoans are very economically oriented and Kamino has the latest equipment and techniques. I would suspect there are thousands, maybe hundreds of thousands, of different strings. So I am asking you to, please, not to try working up a vaccine." Cody sighed deeply, bringing in a deep breath of fresh air. That was it. His head pounded, but there was nothing more to add to that information and it wouldn't get any worse.

"I don't know, Cody. You alerted me to the risks, but still; so many lives could be saved." Saria's expression was worried and he understood that. The woman and the younglings would still need to be protected from the virus.

He nodded. "Then investigate. See what you can find out. But, please, do not test anything." He stood, pushing himself from the new growth of grass.

"Cody," her voice was slow and he realized what she was going to ask. He'd given her too much. "If the Kaminoans have that much information on your bodies, then anytime it shows up in a medical exam or an autopsy, they'll know where to find you."

"Yes. Although after an autopsy I don't think I'd have too much concern." He nodded. "If it shows up in a vaccine, they'll find out."

"And your children." Absently, she ran her fingers over her pregnant roundness.

"Up until a few years ago, none of us thought of children. The Kaminoans didn't either, otherwise they easily would have made us sterile. But there was a lot of anti-sex propaganda both overt and covert drilled into us."

Saria shook her head with a wry smile. "Sex, love, it's a human imperative. Nature always finds a way."

"They did a thorough job. Most of us still don't think of children. Even when Ahsoka told me about Barriss visiting her," he paused. "and our child, I couldn't picture it. I still can't. If something happened to the baby peach or to any of the unborn children here, I would be more shaken than the thought of my own child already dead." Cody shook his head. "I'm sorry, Saria. Off on a tangent. Our children will have only half of our compliment of genes and the fact that we can have children without killing the mother indicates these random genetic markers are not inherited." He frowned. "But, yes, they will be alerted when our children start showing up in medical exams."

"What will you do, Cody?"

"Whatever we have to do, Saria." Cody shrugged. "It's why Rex is only taking men to Outer Rim. To places not controlled by the Empire. To places unlikely to report any medical oddities with Kamino."

"They'll find out. Doctors and geneticists love talking about unusual cases. One day, they'll find out."

"Hopefully, by then, it won't matter." He had to find Edge for some painkiller for his headache, but his words gave him the seed of an idea.

* * *

**A Father and Son**

Rex sat cross-legged on one of the warm boulders by the thermal pool, Barin drowsing half in his lap and half sprawled on the boulder. Sketch was seated in the hot water while Chopper gently manipulated his ankle and foot. Checkout was curled on another of the warm boulders, asleep, his breathing soft and even. Dare, by the small campfire, was adding a bit of barely cooked egg to his nutritional supplement.

Rex's fingers combed through his son's golden hair slowly. He rubbed the base of Barin's montrals and stroked his son's tanned back. In the last year, Barin had gone from chubby child to a young boy of all legs and arms. Rex was glad he hadn't missed that as he had missed everything that had gone before.

Rex looked sorrowfully at his son.

He'd thought of it yesterday, while speaking with Aureki and he'd gone to the front porch to ask Saria.

"Saria," he had asked from five meters away, just in case. "Saria, was Kix contagious when he drew my blood?"

"He hasn't shown any symptoms," she smiled and her voice was merry. "And, if he's right, you don't even have to worry about it."

"Saria, Barin was with me yesterday when Kix came and asked for my blood." His voice had been low, questioning.

He saw it in her eyes, suddenly sad. He heard it in her quick inhale, the stillness of her body. Rex swallowed as pain gripped his heart and nodded. "Thank you, Saria." He stood and started walking toward where he'd left Barin with his uncles Chopper and Sketch. "We'll be going into isolation with the men from practice," he told them.  They had nodded mournfully at the implication.

Rex pulled the sleeping boy closer into his arms. Barin had been delighted to be asked where isolation was to happen. He'd chosen the thermal pool and his uncles had told him it was a good choice with laughter and pats on his back. Barin had played with them all, generally three or four – and always Rex – in the pool with him. Laughing and splashing and swimming and being the ball in games of catch between the men; all delighted to be splashed by the boy. Only as a happily exhausted Barin crawled into Rex's lap had he looked at his father and asked, "Am I going to get sick and die?" He was asleep before Rex could formulate an answer.

Echo came to the cave. Until he sat next to Rex and gently laid his hand on Barin's back, he hadn't been exposed to the contagion.

"He's my son, too, Rex." He bowed his head over the sleeping boy. "Aureki wanted to break isolation and come see him, but I told her 'no'. I had to order her and she's not going to forgive me for a long while. I think she might try to come anyway so I've asked Countdown and Edge to make sure she doesn't leave the house."

"You shouldn't have come either." But Rex was glad his brother had joined them.

Echo shrugged. "In case Kix's idea actually works, and Saria is very optimistic it will, Cody, Five and I have been working on some plans to get to Cut. To bring him and Sinker back."

"I won't be going, Echo. This cure might work for us clones, but Barin is still at risk and I won't leave him." Rex had already decided; nothing was as important as Barin.

Echo nodded. "Neither will I." Echo moved his hand from Barin to Rex's shoulder. "They're thinking two teams, three men each. Jester and Kix are obvious choices. One team will go to Saria's office and grab some medical supplies before going to the apartment. The other team goes directly to the apartment. Most of the men have volunteered and we're just waiting to see the results from Jester's house. Saria's making a list of the supplies which should be in her office; what she believes might best help Cut. What they should bring back here. Jester's already drilling the other men on Issuya."

"You'll want a scout with each team. That means Boil and Waxer." Rex bent his head forward as Echo massaged the tight muscles of his shoulders.

Echo nodded. "Cody sent Kaver to ask them, but he hasn't come back yet. Baffle ranged wide last night and saw more drifters last night on the road. He said more and more people are trying to escape from Issuya. Only one came towards the farm but Baffle had a blaster. He moved back to the road with no arguments. He also told Baffle that Issuya is kicking out the infected, that civilians are gathering into neighborhood groups, enforcing curfews and quarantine laws."

Rex knew that; knew that as bureaucracies failed, people took the law into their own hands. Mob rule instead of law.

Echo stood, rubbing his eyes with a hand. "Edge said he'd go one on one with Kix."

Rex shook his head. "It wouldn't serve any purpose, Echo."

"Everyone knows that, Rex.  It doesn't matter."


	13. Issuya

* * *

 

**On the Edge of the Caldera**

The scouts and the younglings were camped at the edge of the caldera where wind-scoured rocks rose above the arid, rocky plains on the outer side of the caldera. They'd found a good camp. There was a small but constant trickle of water discoloring one boulder before sliding into a narrow crevice and disappearing into the ground; several large trees like those in front of the house that were good for climbing and a flat area for easy sleep around the small fire.

Kaver stayed his distance as he told them about Kix's work, about Djinn, Riven and Shy's quick recoveries. "It's only for the clones," he'd shook his head sadly as he looked at Jek who was roasting a small ground kvet over the fire. Jek's face turned pale and he slowly pulled the kvet away from the fire, his hands shaking. He set the small branch and kvet on a rock and pulled his knees up, circling them with his arms.

"Two teams will be making a run into Issuya and we would appreciate the scouts." Kaver nodded his head at Waxer, leaning against a boulder next to Jek and overseeing Shaeeah braiding some cordage from flexible bark. Her hands had stopped their motion as he mentioned Issuya and she bit her lower lip to keep from crying but her eyes filled with tears. Boil stood, his hand reaching toward Numa as they quit wrestling. Absently, he helped her to her feet, her slim green hand in his larger one.

"Saria had asked you younglings to come back more slowly, to make your camp in the barn for several days. At the moment, all the men except Boil and Waxer are contagious." He glanced at the two scouts. "And you'll get your little transfusions as soon as you're in camp."

Shaeeah had drawn in her breath and bit her lower lip to keep it from quivering. Jek had jumped up, suddenly more energetic than he'd been since hearing Cut was ill, since Crux had died, tears abruptly dry on his face.

"You're going to get dad?" he'd turned his head to Waxer.

"That's the only reason to go to Issuya." Waxer put his hand on the young man's shoulder and gave a squeeze. "But we'll have to go fast." He looked at Kaver who nodded.

"In a couple of hours. Jester's going, of course, since he's familiar with Issuya. And Kix because he's the medic. Cody and Rex are hoping you'll both go, one with each team." Kaver saw both men nod. "So there's only one more man to choose for each team."

Boil heard Numa's angry breath and he turned to look at her. Perhaps Waxer could only see the child; the five year old Twi'lek girl he had found years ago. Boil could see the woman emerging. She was tall, almost as tall as the men. Lean, with taut muscles, her lekku draping to the small of her back. Sleek and silent were two words that came to mind. She'd been playing the scout's seek with the men, marking most of them several times. She was also graceful, patient, perhaps even deadly. He hoped she never had to find out. He'd protect her from that if he could.

"What if you do not come home, Waxer. I will be devastated." She spoke sharply at Waxer's words, the blind assumption that, of course, her _nerra_ would go. They would go and she loved them for their protectiveness, but it was the careless arrogance of Cody and Rex that angered her.

"We would be glad that a part of our family," Waxer smiled and turned to face her, "the best part of our family survives."

Kaver watched, his lips slightly open in surprise at her anger. He thought family never fought, never got angry, never argued.

There was refusal in her face, firmness in her chin, and both Waxer and Boil saw it. Boil spoke.

"Numa, what if only one of us comes home?" His words were soft and her brown eyes, so like most of the clones, shot wide. Her anger melted. Her _nerra_ were partners since before she'd known them; if only one came home, he would be devastated. He would need her.

"I will wait," she whispered, pushing her anger aside. She hugged Boil hard around the waist. "I will keep watch here for you. And you _will_ both come home." She added firmly as she hugged Waxer.

* * *

 

**Volunteers**

Jesse volunteered but Kix shook his head.

"You could probably make it, Jesse, but I've taken a lot of blood out of both you and Rex to inoculate all the men. You're not going and that's a medic's call." He glanced at Saria from the corner of his eyes and saw her agreement.

Jesse bowed his head with an ugly grimace. It would have been his first chance to pay Elarlu, but he understood. Kix had taken slightly more blood from him and Rex than usual to make sure all the men were sufficiently inoculated. He glanced around the front yard. Sula was at the door of the house while Saria sat on the front porch. Aureki could be seen through the window but she had nothing to say.

Rex and Echo were staying with Barin. Even now, they were all three in the branches of the big tree in front of the house, Barin climbing from branch to branch. Saria had look at him and had told both men Barin probably wasn't infected, but neither Rex nor Echo were going to chance leaving him. Rex wouldn't even been considered after Kix had vetoed Jesse and for the same reason.

Chopper and Sketch were in the tree also, Sketch had climbed to the lowest branch by the strength of his arms. He obviously couldn't make the run into Issuya. Dare, also, wouldn't make it. Saria had looked at him and promised him she'd replace the metal wire on his jaws with flexibands in three days but he no longer had the muscle or endurance for the run. He was sitting five meters from Sula with his back to the wall of the house and his eyes closed, as near to her as the quarantine would allow. Saria also had vetoed the men who'd been wounded in prison as well as the men who'd been ill; Kayl, Kaver, Riposte, Djinn, Riven, Shy.

The scouts had returned with Kaver. Boil told everyone the younglings would stay on the edge of the desert for several more days – until the main camp of men were no longer contagious. But the scouts had asked for one of their brothers to check on them each day. Edge had nodded, as had Djinn and Chopper.

"I will go," said Cody.

"Let them decide who goes," said Rex as he gestured to Jester and the other men preparing for Issuya.

"Not Cody. Fives," murmured Kix. Then he spoke a bit louder, making his opinion known. He didn't want Cody leading them. He wanted Fives. He was ARC and could even pass for a scruffy civilian with his long hair. This was not an army maneuver, not a large group requiring command overview of long-term objectives, but a small squad assignment of infiltration.

Fives turned to Sula. "May I go, wife?"

She reached out her hand as if to touch him and Fives, smiling, shut his eyes. Suddenly her face was all passion. The distantly kind woman who had listened to their tales of horror from war and prison; who had made them feel safe and acknowledged their human actions overriding orders and programming, was gone. In her place stood a woman so vividly alive the air seemed to crackle around her.

"You will come home," she said, her voice shaking with emotion as she lowered her hand.

"I wouldn't dare do otherwise." Fives answered softly with a rakish grin. He made a gesture with his hands, touching his chest with the fingers of one hand then laying that hand on the palm of his other as if presenting her with his heart.

"Anyone else?" asked Cody. He'd been vetoed and accepted that.

"I'll go." It was Backup but Checkout made a noise.

"There's no flyers, no use for a pilot on this assignment." Checkout's voice was angry as he mutterlingly mimicked Backup's words from when Suu had left the cooking to them.

"No," stated Jester to Backup in a clear voice that carried among them. "We'll need someone we can trust to pick up the slack." He looked into Backup's surprised eyes. "And that isn't you."

"I'll volunteer," Quad stepped forward. "I .. "

"Quad's good," called Chopper from the tree. "I'd partner him anytime."

Boil nodded. Quad had been a good addition to the outer ring camp; protective of both Numa and Shaeeah, willing to do whatever was need around camp and a decent fighter in the sparring. He'd spent a lot of time with Jester, Jek and Shaeeah in seeding the fields to help with the farm and Boil saw Jester nod. "He can come," said Boil.

* * *

**Infiltrating Issuya**

They reached the outskirts of Issuya before midnight. They had to avoid two groups of drifters; one group large, loud, noisy and belligerent, thinking there was safety in numbers. The other group smaller, quieter, hunting, scavenging but too large to be silent like six clone troopers.

They avoided the road as well as farms and farmers who might take pot shots at them. Jester, familiar with the area, led them; his armor modified and painted navy blue and a rust red almost invisible in the twilight. Boil wore his breast and thigh plates, hurriedly painted a smudged grey. He brought up the rear and, like Jester, had a blaster in his hand. Kix, Fives, Waxer and Quad were in second-hand clothes and boots that Suu had brought from Issuya little over a ten-day ago.

At Issuya they saw only the major route into the city was covered. Kix shook his head. "What a waste," he muttered. "Who is under quarantine? There are sick people inside Issuya and sick outside. This isn't any type of protocol. It's just movement to make people think something is being done."

Jester waved him over, toward a residential area of town. They skirted the edges of large residences. There was a noticeable lack of human sound and movement. Jester stopped them at a small park nudged in between an artificial lake and a small pathway leading into the city.

"A little rest, drink up, check your packs." He said, loosening the straps of his pack and taking some water. He glanced at his chron and nodded. They were ahead of schedule, making good time.

Each man had a small pack containing water, a couple of packs of fluid replacement and, most importantly, tubules of blood and needles sufficient for the inoculation. Kix had given them instructions: attach needle, insert and try to hit a vein.

Quickly, they reviewed the plan in brief. Fives, Quad and Boil were going directly to Saria's apartment. Once at the apartment, they would tend to Cut the best they could. Jester, Waxer and Kix were going to take a detour to Saria's office which they hoped, hadn't been ransacked beyond usefulness. Saria told them there was a litter with a small anti-grav unit they could use to bring Cut back to the farm where they'd all be going directly to Jester's. They'd all had an infusion of Rex's blood, but coming out of Issuya they'd be contagious. Suu had the house, still not ill after such a long exposure and Saria had commented she might have Kix use Suu's blood to make a vaccine for them. None of them begrudged Suu the house and the beds; she had volunteered to keep them fed.

"You know the way?" Jester quickly double-checked with Fives, Jesse and Boil. Issuya wasn't large, but they'd never been there and, from Sinker's reports, there would be several gangs on their way. Their basic plan was avoidance of anyone. The three men affirmed their route.

Jester glanced at Kix and Waxer. "Got the route?" Kix nodded and Waxer tapped his head. In case something happened to Jester. He hoped not, they'd have problems getting into Saria's office.

Fives pushed the water bottle back into his pack and tightened the straps. He gestured to Boil and Quad who were making sure their packs were secure. Quad had tucked his pack inside his shirt, next to his skin. "Less noticeable," he had muttered. "It won't get lost if the straps break."

Fives grinned at Jester. "See you at the apartment," he said quietly then loped off with Boil and Quad. Boil, in his darkened armor, helmetless, taking the lead after a quick grasp of Waxer's forearm and a silent promise to return.

* * *

**Jester, Kix, Waxer**

Jester saw the long line of guards. It was mostly Twi'leks who lived in this sector of town and it was mostly Twi'leks in the line, at least one guard in every corner. He wondered if the entire city center was surrounded by guards. Their weapons were small blasters and hunting rifles; the kind of weapons common in a household. He thumbed his chin thoughtfully, taking in the implications. This wasn't proscribed by authority, this was citizen action. Mob rule. He sighed sadly. Anarchy in action was an ugly sight.

"Waxer, Kix. Ideas on getting across the line?" He caught Kix's eyes and realized he also had the same idea, simply speed and brute force; calculating how much damage they could take, what losses they could afford to take by simply trying to run the line. Whoever went first would probably make it on surprise alone. Jester would probably make it; he was wearing his motley painted armor and no one had a military blaster, simply the less effective civilian weapons. He would volunteer to go last. It looked both possible and probable for all three of them to make it; the buildings closed in quickly beyond the stretched line of guards, shadows stretching from the buildings. Three men running into a cordoned area … probably no one would follow.

He heard Waxer's chuckle before he looked at him. "Sounds like Waxer has an idea."

"Numa's idea actually," came Waxer's voice. Jester and Kix turned. Waxer was looking down at his feet, standing on a drainage cover.

The drainways were small and deserted; slime covered the rounded walls, water puddled at their feet, but the recent rains had cleared out the drains. They had to bend, just a little, in the walkways. And yet, there were biolums dimly lighting the walking ledge and they found corner markers detailing crossroad names. Jester laughed.

"We should be able to make the entire trek to the office underground." He said, leading the way at a slow lope. "Maybe even to the apartment."

* * *

**Fives, Boil, Quad**

The first thing Boil noted were the carrion eaters then he noticed the bodies. Not many. Not yet. They were in a residential area, quickly moving past homes and the only movement had been the small, knee-high creatures moving like worms on human-sized bundles. Boil wished he had his helmet.

"Don't mess with the bodies," he warned. "If the scavengers don't attack you, the stench will." He'd never worked with either Fives or Quad, didn't know what training or experience they had. Fives was ARC and that meant he was good; capable. Quad had been quiet and competent back in camp. Still, he'd never worked with them in a squad.

They moved quickly, avoiding a group of scavengers tearing at a larger pile of bodies stacked at a crossroad. There were few sounds other than the growling and fighting of animals. Only once did they see another human; a Wroonian, his blue skin rendering him almost invisible in the twilight night. But they caught the metallic gleam of a weapon as the man stood guard near a large house.

A man, like them, protecting his own.

"I'll cover," said Boil, taking the side of the street with the Wroonian. With his armor he was slightly better protected, but the Wroonian wasn't interested in starting anything and, as they passed him, he relaxed and shifted closer to the wall of the house becoming invisible in the darkness and shadow.

They moved from the residential area towards the city proper, the centralized bureaucratic and services area of Issuya. Ahead of them they could hear noises; of civilization, if you called it that. The three men slowed, furtively moving in nearer the walls where the shadows prevailed. Party noises, drunken revelry, live bodies and a large bonfire in a park met their senses.

"No discipline," scoffed Boil.

Fives shrugged. "There's a good chance most of them will be dead in a week. Discipline means nothing under those conditions. Shall we go around them?"

Quad glanced at the mixed group of Wroonian, Twi'lek and human; some lolling around drinking, some dancing hypnotically around the fire and some, usually couples, sometimes more, writhing on the soft, manicured lawn. "Around," he agreed.

"Going around might be a little more difficult." Boil tapped Fives on the arm and gestured to a line of people, obviously on some type of guard duty. They were armed and located down two streets radiating from the park in opposite directions, appearantly at the corner of each intersection. "Unless we go out of our way – and no telling how far – we're going to have to cross their line."

Fives nodded. "Let's go one klick parallel and check how diligence they are."

They were diligent, though here the guards did not rove. They were present at the corner of each block, most of them easily in sight of another guard, more often two.

The troopers drew back and made their plans. They'd found a curve where, if they could incapacitate two guards, they could cross the perimeter without being seen by any other guards.

"Not her," said Boil. "Look at her, she's alert." Fives and Quad glanced at the woman near the middle of the curving road. She stood, her hand on the blaster at her hips, her weight equally balanced on foot. Occasionally, her head moved as she heard some noise or glanced up and down the street to the next guard. Their attention was towards the center of town. Fives smiled. They'd be able to walk up to the two very easily. Still, he didn't want any shout or call of alarm.

"Him?" asked Quad, pointing to the next guard in the line. He was leaning against the wall of a building, the rifle cradled in his arms. The space near the wall was dark; hidden in the shadow of an awning and he might merely have been hiding. Except his head was bowed and his legs were crossed at the ankle.

"Oh, yes," Fives grinned wolfishly. "Him."

Fives moved drunkenly between two guards, closer to the man and out of sight of any guards beyond the woman. He wasn't trying to be secretive about it. The man lazily uncrossed his ankles and stood then moved toward him from his post.

Pressed against the wall at the intersection behind Fives were Quad and Boil.

"Stop," ordered the guard as he closed with Fives.

"Wha' fur'" growl Fives in a drunken slur. "We're all just walking dead." He swung his arm out in a grand gesture, almost touching the guard's blaster. "See. Just krf'n dead." Fives stopped, his attention diverted by the woman making her way towards them. She was Wroonian, blue and almost invisible in the twilight of Saleucami darkness. Boil had been right. She was more alert than the man.

They were spread thin and they were covering each other. Her slot would not be covered while she was helping the next guard in line. They thought him outnumbered, outgunned. But he had gauged it so that no other guard could see what was happening. The guard beyond her would be shifting to cover her post, but he wouldn't be able to see what was happening until he came around the curve; maybe a hundred heartbeats. The others were within ear shot, of course, but Fives didn't intend any noise escape either guard. It would be just a few moments, just a small line of invisibility from the others.

Drunkenly, he swayed in time to her movement as she walked toward him, his mouth open. She was beautiful and knew it, used it, so he could stare, she was encouraging that. She meant it as a distraction. He put one hand clumsily on the guard's shoulder, turning him so his back was to the intersection, to Quad and Boil. The guard let him do it, not a professional.

"I don' wanna die 'til I do her," Fives whispered loudly. "She's not your girlfriend, isshe?"

The guard pushed him away with a disgusted noise but didn't check behind him. Fives staggered forward, let himself trip, let himself end up on the ground at her feet. He opened his arms. "Sweetheart. Where you been all my life?" He staggered to his knees, his arms around her legs. Nope, not professional. A professional wouldn't have let him touch her.

"What's the matter, Tandril?" The woman asked.

"The drunk wants to go inner city."

Fives smiled, their attention was on him.

She looked at him, belatedly kicking aside his arms.

"Darlin', I'm hurt. That was my heart you just kicked." Fives stayed on his knees. "I jus wanna go home…" he begged her, sitting back clumsily. She sighed, obviously having dealt with a lot of this over the past four days. He leaned forward, using her legs to climb to his feet, she even extended her hand to help him up. Not professional. Strong. Confident. Possibly even trained in some martial art or another. But not professional at all.

"You can't, there's plague in the city." So, she was some part of an unofficial quarantine effort. "We're going to burn them out. Purify it and in a couple of days, it will all be over. You can go home then."

"Burn who out," he asked. For information he would waste precious seconds. Quad was moving, behind the other guard and within an arm's reach.

"The _kriffing_ migrants.

"Sweetheart," she suddenly noticed he was sober and his hard hands were on her shoulders, his thumbs on her neck. Her eyes widened in fear and she opened her mouth even as her hands reached for her blaster. "There's sickness everywhere, not just in the town center. Would you burn the whole world?"

Fives took her down, pressing quickly on her carotids, then releasing them after mere seconds. He really didn't want to kill her and hoped he hadn't. He even took a moment to hope she survived this mess. She was just scared, someone who needed to go home.

He heard the muffled sound of the man hitting the ground. "Take his blaster, Quad. I'll take hers." He waved the armored Boil through, glancing both ways on the street. They were out of view for another twenty heartbeats.

Good news. If they were intent on burning out the disease, then they probably wouldn't give chase. Bad news. They were intent on burning out the town center.

The crossed the road into the shadows and were almost two blocks in before they heard the shout of alarm.

They kept moving; Boil in the lead in his darkened armor with the deece, then Quad, with Fives bringing up the rear, both with the blasters they'd taken from the guards.

Fives grinned ferociously. He loved his wives and baby girl. He loved his brothers. But this was what he'd been bred and trained for and there was nothing else like it.

* * *

**Waiting**

Sinker gently touched Cut's throat where a thin pulse still, improbably, tickled his fingers. Gently, he pulled the covers up on Cut's chest. Cut's breathing was so shallow, so imperceptible, there was no movement. He daubed a few drops of nutrient-enhanced liquid onto Cut's dry lips then checked his hand. The bite had become infected but there'd been plenty of medical supplies in one of the closets. Cut had laughed while pulling out some bacta and bandage. "She's a surgical nurse," he'd said.

Sinker had been so glad of the supplies when Cut had fallen into a coma. He'd been scared to use things he couldn't read, but he remembered bottle types and smells and textures. When Cut had begun coughing, he's gone over the supplies, reading the labels for Sinker.

She, whoever she was, had a neat and methodical mind.

Sinker wasn't about to give up on Cut. He'd been awake for the past two days, napping lightly on the chair by his bed.

After his escape from prison he'd realized he couldn't read anymore; not just words, but numbers, money, and maps. The beating had damaged his brain and he wondered how badly it had damaged him. The bruises had gone away, but the fear remained. He'd never been scared as a trooper.

Somehow, they'd known he couldn't understand when he sold his armor. He'd realized then that he'd need someone and he had cried for the fact that there was no one. He cried for Boost and Comet, long dead, and for Wolffe, dying incrementally as he led stormtroopers in the Imperial Army. Then Sinker had cried realizing that emotions could be so strong. Not just emotions from a moment of life and death on the battlefield, but simple emotions like loneliness and the quiet fear of losing some other part of himself.

He'd been scavenging food for most of the time since his escape. There'd been a few kind people – a young boy who had shared a packed lunch, a restaurateur who had served him from the back of the eatery, a woman baking some treats for children who'd seen him watching her with hunger on his face. She hadn't realized it was a far different hunger, a hunger for acceptance; but the cookies had been delicious. Far too often, though, there'd been wariness, outright threats, thrown stones, and Sinker had moved on. He'd been chased into the docks and they intended to kill him so he'd chanced stowing away on a ship. The captain had found him in the cargo hold, shivering from the cold. The hard-eyed man had dumped him on their next port of call, Saleucami, and Sinker, knowing the penalties, knowing what he could have done, thanked him.

Then he'd stolen into the warehouse here on Saleucami.

Sinker sat back in the chair, the blaster at his hip. He'd taken to wearing it in the apartment since a gang had busted into the building next door. There'd been fighting and the next day Sinker had seen bodies removed by other residents. The gang had only stayed a single night, grabbing valuables for a tenuous future that might not exist and grabbing food for the now and wrecking whatever they deemed useless. He'd heard screaming and wondered how a human being could be deemed useless. He'd thought about confronting them, about sniping through the window or as they moved back onto the street. He had discarded the idea. Cut had lapsed into a coma by then. He'd do Cut no good by getting himself wounded or killed.

He had found good food at the warehouse; tightly packed, still cool from the conservator, and simply tossed out into the trash of the alley. He'd been hungry and his belly had reveled in the salad of bith beans, lettuce, spinach and peppers with cut muja. That salad had enticed him to try the warehouse in the dark of the night. He had climbed through a grain hopper, and he'd found more food. After the second night he had cleaned the office. After the third night he realized that someone was actually cutting the food into halves. That had scared him off for a day and when hunger had returned him, he'd seen the night guard leaning his chair against a wall, snoring. After two more nights he'd found the flimsi with the food; neatly folded and partially tucked under a biscuit. He had cried in frustration to see that piece of communication; knowing it was meant for him and not able to understand it.

Outside he heard noise and stood, glancing out the darkened windows. He didn't turn on the light except in Cut's room and those windows he had darkened. Movement scurried past the yard below him and Sinker ran his fingers lightly over the barrel of the blaster. They didn't move right to be his brothers. Sinker sighed, moved back to his seat. He leaned forward and dropped a little more liquid on Cut's lips.

"Stay. 'Live," he whispered. "Vod. Come."

The warehouse. Slipping in under the cover of darkness, silently moving into the office where he'd found food before. Then hearing Cut's voice, a brother's voice, greeting him had frightened him even more. He hadn't told Cut how close he'd been to pulling the trigger that night, hadn't told him how startled he was. He suspected Cut knew. And dinner – dinner made _for him_ , still hot – steak and gravy and beans and blue milk, food to take with him for the next day and a job. They'd taken him home; well, to someone's home with a hot shower and clothes and companions and caf the next morning. He now knew those to be riches beyond price.

In the first few days of quarantine, Cut had shown him how to cook a few things as he talked of the brothers at the farm, the work that needed to be done. He talked of family; the children; his own as well as the son of Rex and the Jedi he'd married and Five's two Zeltron wives and their tiny child.

Then the coughing began. The shivers and the heat from the infected hand followed. Last night he had pulled out the comm unit and stared at it. He had flicked it on. Suu had spoken with Cut every night since she'd left until Cut fell into a coma. She'd always had a few words for Sinker.

Suu had answered with a sharp intake of breath. "Sinker. Please don't tell me…"

"No," he interjected. "Still. Coma." He'd spoken and heard her choked sob in reply.

"Soon, Sinker. They'll be there soon." Her voice was soft, more a prayer than anything else.

He pulled on his lower lip with his teeth. "Lone. Ly. Talk. Please. Cut. Me."

Then he had put the comm next to Cut's head on the pillow and sat cross-legged on the floor, his own head on the other side of the comm; listening to her words of love and comfort. Suu spoke a long time; giving him words of hope, news of his brothers, of the younglings. Sinker closed his eyes. He so badly wanted to see the children, wanted to learn this game of chase everyone played in the afternoon. He actually wanted to hold an infant in his arms, wanted to ride an eopie, to help on the farm. He wanted to greet his brothers, to thank Boil for what he'd done.

There was a pounding on the outer door of the building; a fast, hard double-pound, then silence. Sinker moved toward the patio door and looked out. He saw movement and pulled the blaster into his hand without thought while opening the door with his other. His brothers had arrived. He recognized Quad and Boil. Quad was the first to climb the patio. A shaggy-haired brother – Fives from the description Cut have given – had bent and given Quad a push up while Sinker had reached down his arm to help him over the railing.

"Guard," Quad had said, as he bent down to reach for Fives who quickly clambered up. He gave Sinker a quick nod and pulled his own blaster; both men covering as Boil climbed the patio with help from Quad. Sinker led them into Cut's room, wondering if Cut had died in only the last few moments he'd been helping his brothers into the apartment. The thin, thread pulse still murmured against his fingers.

Quad hadn't even waited for confirmation he was alive, but was reaching into his pack even as Fives did the same. Boil was at the patio door, looking out. His face no different from the hard, stern expression he'd always had as he walked the prison perimeter.

"We were noticed the last few blocks." He glanced at Sinker. "They gave chase and we had to lead them away then double back here to the apartment. Are they likely to find us?"

Sinker thought. If they'd given chase it was probably the gang he had dubbed Wild. They didn't think; they rampaged, they destroyed and could barely keep the same members each night. Sinker shook his head as he held up two fingers. "Wild." He bit off the words as he touched one finger. "No. rules." Then he touched his other finger. "S..smard. Wait. Hunt."

Boil nodded thoughtfully and reached for his pack. "There's an inoculation in here for you. Quad or Fives can do it. I'll stay on the patio watching." Sinker took the pack from his outreached hand and took another step that put him closer to his ex-guard.

"Dank. Ou. Boil." He flicked his fingers in an outward, moving gesture. "Ssscape."

Boil regarded him with red-brown eyes. "They really messed you up." He glanced into the darkness. "I'm sorry I didn't get you out sooner."

Sinker put a hand on Boil's shoulder and shook his head with a smile. "Out. Ffree."

Fives came out to the patio shaking his head. Sinker watched, fascinated, as his long hair moved in waves. He'd never seen a brother with hair like that and he reached out hesitantly to touch it. Fives grinned and leaned forward, letting his brother's fingers run through it.

"Dif. Rent," muttered Sinker then he moved his hand away and reached up to his own short-cut hair. "May. Do."

"Think about it while you sleep, Sinker." Fives touched his own blaster, not a deece but something civilian. "We'll guard; wait here for the others. Watch Cut." He reached for the pack and put a hand on Sinker's arm. "Come on. I'll give you the inoculation."

Sinker nodded, letting himself be led into the other bedroom. He gestured to a small pile of miscellanea on the floor then toward the cabinet where there were more medical supplies. "Think. Use. Full."

Fives nodded. "We'll go through them and pack up when the others arrive. We'll have to see how much they have also."

Sinker sat on the bed and rubbed his face with his hand. "Tired." He glanced up to Fives and hoped he wouldn't see disgust in those brown eyes. "A. Fraid." Fives rubbed his shoulder and pushed him back onto the bed. He reached into the pack for the vial and needle.

"Civilian life is very different, more uncertain, than being a trooper." He snapped the needle onto the vial then stroked the inside of Sinker's elbow. "There are so many more choices and so many more possibilities of things that can go wrong. You'd be a fool not to be afraid."

Fives looked into Sinker's face. "But there is so much more to gain; so many more rewards." He withdrew the needle and the empty vial. "You're with family now, Sinker."

Sinker smiled, rubbed his inner arm then shut his eyes and dreamed.

* * *

**Waiting II**

Quad snapped the empty vial off the needle then fixed the second vial onto it and pressed Rex and Jesse's blood into Cut. A moment and it was done. He slipped the needle out of Cut's vein and set it aside.

"How's he doing, Quad?" Fives was in the doorway.

Quad shook his head. "I don't know. I'd say not good; but Sinker's kept him alive this long. Kix said that Djinn and Riven got better overnight. So there's hope, isn't there?"

Fives nodded. "I think so. Boil and I will keep watch for the others if you'll watch over Cut."

Quad nodded. "I'd consider it a privilege."

Fives moved out of the room gently closing the door partway. "Call out if you need anything."

Quad picked up Cut's hand. "Hey, Cut. We're here. We'll be taking you home shortly." He spoke softly to the unconscious man. "Suu is really worried about you." He shifted in the chair, getting more comfortable. "I've been out planting wheat with Jek and Jester and Shaeeah. All the fields have been planted and look good. At least Suu says so. She asked us to start what she calls an intensive field. She's thinking of a nysilum crop but wants to confer with you. Us troopers, we just dig." He rubbed his thumb over Cut's knuckles. There were scars there, old ones. "I see you've done a bit of one-on-one." He chuckled. "I think you could have taken Checkout and Backup. They can't cook worth anything either. Some of us have been lucky. Shaeeah cooks for me and Chopper. She misses you, Cut. Your whole family is scared you won't come home."

Quad felt a lumpy knot deep in his throat. "That includes a lot of us brothers. You'd better come home, Cut." Quad reached for the liquid drops and squeezed a few on Cut's lips. There was no reaction from Cut and the drops simply soaked into his dry skin. "We'd take care of them, Cut. You know we would, but it wouldn't be the same. Jek is walking around as pale as a ghost half the time. Suu looks about to cry at a word from anyone and Shaeeah…" Quad was quiet.

_Quad no longer had to look for Shaeeah. It seemed as though his eyes were drawn to her no matter where she was. It seemed that she was in every conversation he had. It was not as though either of them followed the other around camp; simply that camp was too small for them to be apart. Until Cut had been infected, Quad and Shaeeah had talked and laughed; sometimes alone, more often with other brothers or while playing the games in the early evening. Often at dinner, Quad joined her and Chopper or she joined him with Boil, Waxer and Numa. She and Numa had shown the men of scout's camp how to cook skewers of meat and vegetables._

_She had invited him to the thermal pool. No one else would be there, she told him and he knew that was true. It was the women's hour but that was now only Shaeeah and Numa; and Numa had gone to the caldera with Waxer and Boil._

_They were quiet as they walked, but after some time, Shaeeah moved next to him and took his hand in hers. He smiled and gave her hand a squeeze._

" _That makes it harder, you know." He said._

" _Harder to do what?" she asked with a tilt of her head._

" _Harder to do everything. Harder to walk fast, or to walk quietly."_

" _I don't think we need to walk quiet today." She answered. "Though I am trying to learn. Have you heard Numa walk?"_

" _No," he replied with a slightly embarrassed grin. "If I had, she wouldn't have marked me in scout's seek. She's quiet. But she's been trained by a scout for what? Six years?"_

" _Eight years." Shaeeah sighed. "I'll never be that quiet."_

" _Probably not." He agreed. "But I'm sure you have skills she doesn't."_

" _Flirting." Shaeeah said with a laugh. She looked at him, admiring his dark hair and his earnest, brown eyes. Suddenly she was solemn. "This isn't flirting. You know that, don't you."_

" _I'm not sure." He answered. "I wasn't sure. It seemed not, but I don't have any experience."_

_She stopped, pulling him to a stop as well. "Flirting is," her face twisted up and her brows furrowed as she tried to define the difference between flirting and love. She failed. "This isn't flirting." She said again._

" _That's good." He nodded thoughtfully._

" _Why?" She pulled at his hand, walking along the path, and he followed._

_He smiled at her. "I would hate to think that something as simple as flirting could make me forget my way in the woods."_

" _What?"_

_He shrugged. "As often as I've been down here with others, I have to admit that I don't recognize that tree. And that rock looks totally unfamiliar."_

" _You're lost?" Shaeeah's eyes grew wide. "My father said a trooper couldn't get lost."_

" _If he's paying attention. My attention has been on you," he shyly admitted. "I may be lost on this familiar path, but I will never forget the way your hand feels in mine right now."_

_Shaeeah smiled and they continued walking to the pool._

_He was slightly nervous as he removed his clothing. He'd been thinking about Shaeeah and him in the warm waters and little brother had reacted to those thoughts. He was nervous about showing her his entire body. He had lines of burn scar on one leg. She'd never seen that and migh ... then again, she often slept next to Chopper. Quietly he eased himself in the hot water then turned toward Shaeeah as she stood on one of the warm boulders setting her clothes into a neat pile. He gulped hard and watched as she gracefully turned toward him, toward the water, and dove in. She was beautiful, sleek, lithe. He groaned and little brother came to full attention._

" _I thought I'd offer to wash your back." Her voice was timid as she rose from the water in from of him holding out a bar of hard soap._

_He shook his head. "It's not my back needing attention," but he reached his hand for hers._

" _Then," she glanced, smiling, into his eyes, "perhaps you could help me with mine?"_

_Quad smiled at her. "Anything," he said._

_He washed her back, softly kissing and nibbling her lekku at the pleasurable area behind her ears. He soaped and washed her lekku, setting the freshly cleaned tchin and tchun to his teeth, sucking on them, stroking them with his hands to her soft moans. They moved of their own volition; she had told him it was a way Twi'leks could speak with each other._

_He looked at the lekku in his hand and quickly wrapped it once around his little brother. She gasped, her lekku tightened around him, then softly loosened. He groaned at the pleasure and his head dipped onto her shoulder, his hand around her waist for support. He pulled both lekku around his little brother, one in each direction, and almost came at the combination of their tightness and Shaeeah's whimpering moan. His breathing was harsh and warm in her ears. She leaned back, pressing against his hardness. He pressed back, his little brother snug against the division of her cheeks, against the small of her back. He moved his hips and she felt him slide up and down against her skin, between her cheeks and to the small of her back. Her lekku dropped down to caress him. His breathing was shaky. He kissed her shoulder, both shoulders, nibbled her lekku, caressed her breasts with his fingers. She felt hot and wet, neither having to do with the water._

_Slowly, she turned around to face him, bringing her arms around his neck. His hands were still around her, but now they caress the silky skin of her waist and slipped to the small of her back while little brother slid happily against her belly. His head was still on her shoulder, whispering kisses on her neck. Aided by buoyancy, he lifted hr and bent his head further still and slowly took one of her breasts into his lips. Her breasts were small, perfect. He sucked softly then released her breast from his lips. The nipple had wrinkled into a hard nub and she shivered as she murmured her pleasure. Her other nipple was smooth. Experimentally, he touched and then stroked the smooth nipple with his knuckles. He smiled as she groaned and pushed herself against his hands. Her smooth nipple wrinkled and hardened._

" _Does that feel good, Shaeeah? I hope I'm doing this right, does that feel good?_

" _Yes," she moaned. "That feels like.. nothing I've ever felt."_

" _I'm glad, Shaeeah." He murmured. "I want to please you so much." He kissed her lips, sliding his tongue between her lips, playing with her tongue as they had done before. His arms came around her, one hand pulling her against him, the other hand stroking and squeezing her lekku. His rigid little brother felt good hugged between the two of them. He moved his hips, sliding it between them, one of her hands cupping the head of it._

_Suddenly he gasped; she gasped also. He had been lifting her, pulling her up in the water, letting buoyancy work. His little brother, hard and stiff and throbbing, had slid between her legs. Slowly, shaking, he took a step away from her. His voice quivered. "Onto the rocks, Shaeeah." He touched his finger to her lips as she was about to say something. "I'll be right with you." He moved his finger and gave her a kiss._

_With his help, she climbed and sat on the boulder. She was beautiful and Quad couldn't talk for seeing her. He put both hands to his face and rubbed._

" _Please, Quad. Come sit next to me. Hold me in your arms." Her voice lowered. "Kiss me to all distraction."_

_He groaned then gave her a smile. "Anything, Shaeeah. Anything."_

_They sat together, kissing. His hands stroked her lekku with varying strength and she shivered, her back arching at the pleasure. Her fingers played with his nipples and he discovered that his also wrinkled and tightened with pleasure. Her fingers played with his little brother, rubbing the velvet skin, stroking his shaft as he pushed little brother against her hand._

_He had growled deep in his throat. "Shaeeah, I will come." She stopped and he looked at her quizzically. She had liked his coming before._

_He shook, afraid that she no longer wanted him. Then he closed his eyes in a fearful resignation. He'd fallen in love. This was no longer curiosity, if it had ever been simply that. This was beyond liking Shaeeah, beyond enjoying her company, beyond the pleasure they provided each other. This was love and it was torture._

" _Are you ok, Quad. I just want to try something a little different. Her hand touched him, lightly brushing his arm._

_He smiled, for her. "Anything, Shaeeah. Tell me."_

" _I want you to play with me," her face was shy and scared. She slowly pulled his fingers to her private place._

" _I'll try, my love, but it will all be new to me."_

" _You were the first man I ever saw little brother. You were the first man I touched. It was all new to me." She smiled even as she bit her lower lip in nervousness._

" _You pleased me beyond what I had ever imagined." He said with a smile. "I hope I can do as well."_

_He softly placed the palm of his hand at the junction of her legs. She was smooth and had a cleft instead of a penis. Delicately, he manipulated his fingers into that cleft. Once, his fingers touched something and her hips jerked, but she couldn't explain. Then his fingers found moisture and he brought his fingers out in case he was injuring her. The moisture was clear and he touched his tongue to his fingers. There wasn't much taste, but it was warm and reminiscent of her._

_He gently slid his fingers back into her cleft, searching for the moisture._

" _That feels good," she moaned softly, her hips writhing slightly against his hand, and that brought his little brother back to attention. His fingers found an opening, small but wet. He lay down bethween her thighs, using both hands to gently open the flesh of her cleft so he could see. There was an opening, glistening slick and wet and he knew this was where little brother would go. Little brother throbbed in anticipation and Quad's mouth was suddenly dry. It seemed so small an opening. He knew he would not fit._

_The surrounding of her opening was a beautiful pink and there was a small nub of flesh a knuckle's distance above that opening._

_Quad touched the small nub with his finger. Shaeeah's hips jerked up and she gasped._

" _I'm sorry, Shaeeah. I didn't mean to hurt…"_

" _I know, Quad. But it was," she frowned, "too much. That needs to be touched much lighter."_

" _I won't touch it again, Shaeeah." Quad shook his head, one big hand stroking her inner thigh._

" _No, Quad, I want you to explore, just more gentle, with less… friction. Like when you told me it was better to hold you tighter." Her words were slow as she thought about his touch. She saw him smile._

" _With my tongue, Shaeeah? Like your tongue on little brother?"_

_She bit her lip and nodded slowly. Quad moved, once again between her legs. Little brother objected to being flat against the stone, so Quad slide himself toward the edge of the boulder where he would be in the water, lifting and bringing her with him. She squealed and grabbed him at the unexpected movement. If felt so good, he hugged her tightly to him, kissing her lips, kissing her breasts, kissing her lean belly. He slid into the warm water, letting his tongue glide down her belly then between her cleft as he set her on the edge, her legs dangling into the pool. He grabbed one ankle and set it to her advantage so she wouldn't slip or could push away from him if she wished. Then he took her other leg and slid it over his shoulder. His fingers, once again, opened the cleft. As delicately as he could, he touched his tongue to that nub. She gasped._

" _I'm sorry, love, that.." Quad was chagrinned. He'd tried to be light._

" _No, Quad, that was pleasure." She purred, her eyes wide. "That was wonderful." Her fingers combed through his hair. "Please Quad, more?" she asked and Quad laughed. She had pleased him, had taken little brother into her hands, into her mouth and pleasured him beyond anything he'd ever felt before. For her, he would do anything._

_Softly, he gave the nub another quick touch, staying an instant longer._

_"Oh, Quad, Yes." Her voice was low and husky._

_He gently pulled her closer, his tongue delicately gliding over the nub even as his fingers explored the opening. There seemed to be more moisture at her opening and he gave a long stroke with his tongue, picking up the moisture with his tongue. Again, he pressed and wiggled his tongue against that nub._

_She gasped and her body became tense, her breathing was quick with soft moans and little whimpers of desire. He pressed a finger to her opening, debating._

" _Yes, Quad, please yes." She begged. Gently Quad pressed his finger into the opening. It was moist and she moaned, her soft flesh surrounding, pressed against, his finger. He immediately decided that little brother couldn't fit, but that was good because then there'd be no temptation. He could love her without hurting her. They'd already found so many ways of pleasure. He wasn't selfish enough to need them all._

_His breathing was also quick and he began to slide his finger in and out. She was wet, as he'd heard women would get when pleased. He bent his head and touched her nub with his tongue again. Her hips began jerking._

" _Please! Quad. More." That request brought a moment's quandary. More of what? Then he remembered his own experiences with Shaeeah. It was more of everything. He bent his head to her, licking that little nub softly and sliding his finger in and out of her._

_She tensed, tighter, then suddenly there was a release. A release of air from her mouth in a content sigh, a release of her flesh pulling around his finger and little brother recognized that pulsing pattern. There was a release of the tenseness of her muscles and she relaxed, moving her body to slide into his arms, into the water. She kissed him, licking her moisture from his mouth. Little brother, begging to be noticed, slid between them and Quad groaned in pleasured torture. One of Shaeeah's hands took little brother's head and caressed it, her nimble fingers squeezing and stroking, reaching to his balls. Shaeeah's other hand circled Quad's neck, bringing his face closer for her kisses. Quad couldn't last and he came as she caressed and kissed him._

" _Shaeeah?" He asked softly, after a while, wondering if she was still awake as they lay together on the warm boulder._

" _Yes, Quad." Her voice was soft and she gave him a kiss on his arm, where her head was tucked._

" _I love you."_

" _I love you, Quad. I wished I'd recognized it first."_

" _Has your father told you about the two things a clone has when he comes out of Kamino?"_

" _His name and his promise." She said softly._

" _My name is Quad. It comes from my trooper designation, CT-44-4444. A very boring designation, but easy to remember." He laughed and she giggled. My promise is to you, Shaeeah. Wonderful, beautiful, sweet, sexy Shaeeah, it is the first word I spoke to you. Do you remember, Shaeeah?"_

_She nodded. "Anything."_

_Quad smiled. "That is my promise to you Shaeeah. Anything for your happiness and joy."_

Quad looked at his brother, the father of his love and the man who had raised her.

"...and Shaeeah misses you. She hasn't laughed or smiled since we heard you were ill. She cries herself to sleep." Quad looked down at Cut. "I've given Shaeeah my promise, Cut. I love her and will do whatever I must for her happiness. That means I'd better get you home."

* * *

**Departing Issuya**

Several times they heard noises above them and once, only once, Jester caught an IR glimpse of a humanoid in his HUD while they moved quickly through the sewer channel ways. A glance at crossroad names told him they were within a block of Saria's office. Kix listened at the grated slot connected above ground. There was nothing. Waxer went up first after checking with a line viewer for any nearby movement.

"Dead," he muttered then gave a grimace and corrected himself in a soft voice. "No one around." He quickly slid the grated cover aside and pulled himself up after another glance around. Kix followed and Jester brought up the rear. It didn't take them twenty heartbeats to reach the back door of the building. The first combination Jester tried didn't work but the second one did. They heard voices as they moved toward the service lift and Jester motioned them quiet to check. He came back with a shrug; there were people but they were busy and no one noticeably armed.

The elevator door opened to masses of people on cots or on the floor. A woman opened her eyes at the noise of the lift and saw them. "Water, please?" Her voice was a cracked whisper and Kix had out a bottle even as he was evaluating her condition.

"Looks like you pulled through," he murmured as he lifted her head and held the water to her lips.

Waxer tapped him on the shoulder then motioned with his head toward Jester, checking the corner. _Let's go._

Kix sighed. "Here. You can keep this." He handed her the water.

"Thank you," she said softly and closed her eyes as she pulled the bottle to her chest.

The cross corridor was also lined with low cots and people; more people than cots. Most were still; asleep or dead. Jester gestured to a door behind a cot holding a man.

"Follow me. Walk so we don't attract too much attention." His voice was low and quiet.

The door opened on the first combo Jester keyed and they stepped over the man who didn't stir. Jester moved and closed the windows then turned to an inner office and switched on the light. The office was untouched and Jester breathed a sigh of relief.

"Here's the supplies, Kix." Jester moved as the medic began filling his pack with packets and pouches.

"Give me your packs." Kix reached out a hand. "I'll divide it evenly, but we won't be loaded down. It looks like Saria took most of the serious stuff with her." He flipped some syringe tubes and needles into a pack. Fingered a small bottle marked 'Prenatal Vitamins' and dropped it into the pack then added several more.

"I found the stretcher," remarked Waxer holding the compact carry bag then thrusting it into his pack. "But where's the anti-grav unit."

"Here." Jester grunted as he pulled the heavy unit onto the desk. Kix reached over and flicked the self-carry switch. Jester blushed with an embarrassed half-grin while Waxer changed his chuckle into a cough.

They were out of the building quietly. Kix looked around at the people sleeping; the ill, the dying and shook his head then followed his brothers.

Listening for sound other than their own running steps, they moved swiftly in the dark. There were lights in some of the houses, but very few curtains were drawn back in curiosity.

They were making good progress until they heard noise and Waxer motioned them down into silence. The noise was anger and shouting; hate and destruction. Waxer in the lead, they followed then watched as a group of mostly men pushed forward two prisoners; human younglings with their hands tied. There was already a half-naked body on the ground; battered, dark with bruises and stripped of whatever someone had deemed useful.

"I'm sorry, Jester. I can't watch this happen." Waxer said as he checked his blaster. "It looks like they don't know it yet, but when they strip the taller one they'll find out she's female. And they'll rape her first. Then slitting her throat will be a mercy." His eyes glittered in the darkness. His expression told them he'd seen this before. "It didn't happen to Numa. But it could have."

Kix sighed as he checked the civilian blaster. "Me neither."

Jester nodded as he handed Waxer his military blaster and took the civilian one in its stead. "I'll grab them, I'm armored and it doesn't look like their weapons are heavy duty enough to penetrate the armor first blast. You can scatter them for a few moments. If the younglings don't struggle too hard I should be able to get them to you for cutting their bindings." He handed the vibroknife to Kix. "They should figure out to start running and not stop."

"We'll cover you and you'll have surprise, but that many." Kix shook his head. "They might run us to ground."

"The apartment is close." Jester pointed down a street. "Three intersections; left then right at the second intersection and down five buildings. By the time we get there someone should be covering us from the patio."

He took several deep breathes in preparation for a hard sprint as Kix and Waxer vanished into the darkness, making their way to the other side of the fire and the gang intent upon carnage.

Jester was waiting for their signal and it came as the loud, vibrato screech of a gundark. Under his helmet Jester grinned as the entire camp jerked towards that screech. Jester was fast and had already picked his path. No one realized what was happening until Jester was within arms' reach of the two youngling.

"Hey!" yelled a voice, one of the men holding the girl but Jester's vambrace caught him in the throat at speed and he went down. Jester bent slightly as he ran, catching the girl in the gut with his shoulder, grabbing onto her rear end and legs as she started to slide over his back. He felt, rather than heard, her grunt as he knocked the air out of her. Other men started yelling. Still, those in front were more concerned about the screech looking into the darkness. Jester grabbed the boy around the waist and sprinted past the group looking for the gundark.

As Jester sprang past the men in front, Waxer and Kix covered him. There was some blaster fire from the crowd, but most of that seemed to be aimed at where Waxer and Kix might have made the noise.

The rapid snatch had the group in momentary confusion and Jester dropped the boy and slung the girl in front of Kix as he started firing. The vibroknife sliced the bindings quickly and Kix jerked the girl to her feet and pushed her into a run.

"Go!" Kix freed the boy then ran to get ahead of the girl to lead them.

Waxer was moving, back-stepping, preparing to turn as he and Jester. The girl was running fast; though not as fast as a trooper and glancing back at the boy with concern. The boy lacked the long legs and was noticeably slower. Slow enough to be caught. Waxer saw his face; frowning fearfully but determined, knowing he was going to be caught but running as fast as he could. Waxer swept him up in one arm and ran.

"Don't worry, we won't leave you behind," he told the boy. He passed the girl and Kix who was pacing the girl. He spun and let the boy down waiting to cover for Jester. The girl started slowing down.

"Don't slow," yelled Waxer to her as Kix passed him and grabbed the boy on the run. "We've got him." Jester was in view and Waxer fired the heavy weapon aiming behind him.

* * * * * * * * * *

"Where's Boil?" Fives muttered to himself as he stepped out on the patio. A soft half-whistle caught his attention and he glanced up. Boil was on the roof, almost invisible in the dimness. He jerked a flat palm to the side of his head. _Heard something_. Then he fisted his hand and brought it down to his hip. _Blasterfire_. As Fives listened, he heard it also.

"Quad, get Sinker and come out here," Fives called sufficiently loud for his brother to hear him. He heard Quad's reply then pulled himself up another level and onto the roof. The noise was closer and moving quickly. Then they heard the sound of a military deece.

"Jester," said Boil and Fives nodded as he moved towards another point on the roof. If the sound indications were correct, they'd come around the corner several buildings down

A skinny youngling ran into view first, followed by Waxer who turned quickly at the corner and got off a shot from the military blaster at their pursuers. Jester was next, a child tucked under his arm. Kix came around the corner last, followed by the flare of blaster fire so close he probably felt the heat against the side of his face.

"Here!" Jester shouted then threw the child onto the patio. Quad caught him then set him down.

"Wow," breathed the boy quietly.

Jester turned and knelt so abruptly his boot dug a hole into the soil. The second youngling, wide-eyed but barely slowing, placed a foot in Jester's netted fingers and catapulted breathlessly into Quad's waiting hands. Waxer had slowed to cover Kix and it was Kix next to push off Jester and be grabbed by Quad's arm.

By then, nine men pursuing were in sight and from the rooftop Boil and Fives covered Waxer's tracks while from the edge of the patio Sinker did the same; the military deeces of Boil and Sinker sounding heavier and lower and so much closer to the pursuers.

"Ambush!" yelled a voice.

"Pull back," shouted another, letting Boil know who the leader was and taking care of him.

Waxer pushed off Jester's hands, dropping the deece at his side, half-clambering and half-pulled to the patio. By which time only five of the nine remained and when Jester stood his ground, the swirls of his motley armor blending into the darkness, his military blaster firing along with a civilian one, they'd decided the prize wasn't worth the effort. Quickly they retreated around the corner, leaving all but one of the bodies behind. That one had been close enough to grab from around the corner.

Jester pulled himself to the patio with an assist from Fives and Quad, the others already in the darkened apartment.

"Boil and I will lead them away if they haven't run, and relocate the bodies." Fives grinned. "Confusion is good for the soul." Jester nodded and Fives went over the railing followed by Boil. Jester went into the apartment pulling off his helmet.

The two strangers were even younger than he'd originally thought and were sitting at the table, their backs pressed to the wall. The younger one stared at his face as he wiped the sweat with a kitchen towel and Jester remembered his scar. He gave the boy a grin and the boy gave him a tentative smile.

He shrugged then noticed one of the smaller chef knives missing from the kitchen rack. Cut or Sinker or one of his brothers might have moved it but Jester didn't think so. Quad handed him a bottle of water and juice. The corners of his lips curled up as he glanced at the girl from the corner of his eyes and answered that question.

"How are your wrists, Jester?" Quad pulled Jester's arms parallel to the floor, inspecting his wrists with gentle hands. The two younglings wouldn't have been a problem, but Jester had assisted two troopers and that kind of stress could injure a man especially if anyone had stepped wrong.

Jester flexed his fingers and moved his hands for Quad; twisting them side to side. "Adrenaline's still pumping, but seems good."

"That was nicely done, Jester," nodded Quad, agreeing with Jester's assessment.

Jester's eyes came back to their guests. She was staring at his face also, but then her eyes focused on Quad, standing next to him, then on Waxer. She knew what they were. Oddly, she didn't include Sinker in that look.

"How's Cut?" he asked between gulps of water alternating with the juice.

"He still in a coma but better already. He's started to react when I give him a few drops of nutrient. His lips move." Quad grimaced. "Kix will know for sure."

"We have to go," piped up a small voice.

"Fresher's down the hall." Jester gestured vaguely with the bottle, his attention ostensibly on Quad.

"We have to leave," corrected the older youngling, standing with the knife concealed at the side of her leg. Sinker and Waxer were on the couch and that was between them and the door.

Sinker shook his head at the same time Waxer replied. "No. We will be leaving in, what Jester, a quarter cycle?" He glanced at Jester then leaned forward. "You can leave with us. It will give you more protection for the distance you'll be with us."

"Would you prefer water or juice?" Quad asked.

"We'll be leaving now," reiterated the girl as she pushed the younger child toward the door. Jester shrugged.

Sinker stood. "No," he said firmly, standing between the door and her. She brought out the knife then, threatening Sinker with it and he moved slightly, now at an angle to the door.

"We will be going." She glanced toward the boy and motioned to the door with her head. "Get the door." The younger one moved toward the door but Sinker moved quicker, grabbing the boy and tossing him onto the cushions of the couch near Waxer. The girl rushed at him then but Sinker was faster, grabbing her wrist and twisting her around, disarming her in the movement and capturing her in his arm.

"Why not let them leave, Sinker?" Waxer had his hand around the boy's ankle though the boy wasn't struggling.

"Gang," replied Sinker as he touched the dark bracelet on her wrist. "Smar. T." He bit off the last letter, pleased that he could actually pronounce _trill_.

"That does make a difference," said Jester as he looked at the girl. "He's right in that we can't let you leave now. We're not quite trusting of the gangs. Shortly though. We'll be leaving in a short time."

"Not just yet." Fives voice came from the patio as he and Boil came in, closing the door behind them and setting the glass refractor as dark as possible. No one would see in.. He glanced at Sinker then Jester taking in the scenario. "We've moved the bodies; a block over two blocks down, but the gang is searching."

"About twenty of them." It was Boil's voice and he grabbed some water and sat on the chair across from the couch one eyebrow raised in question at Waxer's grip on the boy and Sinker holding the girl, a knife in one hand.

"What the news on Cut?" Fives ignored the tableau and moved toward the hall going into the bedroom. They could hear the murmurs of voices.

"Doesn't matter. We can evade them." She had stopped struggling in Sinker's arms.

"I'll accept that," replied Jester as he sat at the table. "In spite of how we found you."

She didn't blush, exactly, but Sinker raised an eyebrow and Quad chuckled.

"But if you're part of a gang, you're not leaving here before we do." Jester gave a nod at Sinker who led the girl back to the couch by her arm. "Now, back to the original question. Water or juice."

"Juice, please." The boy sat up as Waxer eased his grip on the boy's ankle. He continued his inspection of them as Quad handed him a bottle. Quad handed one to the girl but she ignored his gesture so he handed it to Sinker who took it and set it between them on the couch. She looked at it longingly.

"Are you stormtroopers?" The boy asked into the quiet.

"Dek!" the girl hissed at him and glanced around fearfully.

Jester shook his head. "No. Not anymore." He inspected his hands, rubbing the bottle condensation from his palms. Once it had been blood staining his hands. "Not for a long time."

"So you're not going to kill us?" The boy asked and the girl rolled her eyes.

Boil shrugged. "We'll try not to. Don't be too much of a bother."

Dek inspected him, his face scrunched up in thought then relaxed. "OK." He offered his hand to Boil. "I won't be a bother." Boil, surprised, took it. Dek shook the big hand once then dropped it as he finished his juice. "May I have another, please?"

"As many as you want and whatever else is available," offered Jester and Dek smiled and jumped up from the couch to inspect the kitchen.

"Not. Lot." Sinker shook his head then handed the knife to Jester. "Sleep." He moved toward the back room but first went into where Cut was being seen by Kix.

In a few moments, Sinker emerged to walk down the hall to the other bedroom. Fives came out. "I'm going to keep watch outside."

"Take my blaster, Fives" Jester handed over the military blaster. Fives took it and was out the patio, climbing the roof.

Kix came out and sat at the table. He smiled, glancing at the younglings. "We can go whenever we need to. Cut's stable and, according to Sinker, already looks better than he did before Fives, Quad and Boil got here." He pulled his lower lip in-between his teeth. "It's subjective criteria, but there's no reason to wait." He glanced at the girl then pointed to the bottle. "Drink it and a juice pack. That's a medic's order."

She muttered angrily but pulled the bottle into her hand and broke the seal. She seemed surprised that the seal was good.

Boil gestured at patio door. "Best to wait until Fives tells us it's clear." Jester nodded.

"How did you deal with the epidemic?" It was Kix's voice. He watched them, his eyes patient and curious.

The girl shrugged as she sipped at the bottle.

"I didn't get sick," volunteered Dek to a deep sign from the girl.

There was subtle movement of the men in the room. "You should stay away from us," Waxer's voice was quiet. "We're contagious." Fives came in then.

"We're not scared of that anymore," said the girl with a sigh as she unconsciously tugged at her bracelet. "Dek was sick. So was I. But it wasn't anything." She looked at them and spread her hands palm up. "Just a day or two of coughing and headaches."

"That's not really sick," explained Dek.

"But most of the adults…" she frowned. "Most of them die. Some didn't. There's some. They…" She glanced down at her bracelet. "I really can't tell you anymore." She glared at them, daring them to try to get her to talk.

Fives nodded. "Tell them there appears to be a ring of people who intend to burn out the plague. I'd estimate that we saw approximately fifty people with blasters guarding from the main highway west for about three klicks."

"They appeared to extend into Twi'lek's Corner," added Jester. "That's about four more klicks; maybe eighty more people with weapons. And that's only counting people with weapons."

The girl frowned and her lower lip trembled. "Burn out Issuya?"

"That's what I was told." Fives nodded to Jester. "The gang has passed us by; I think we should give them another quarter cycle before we leave. We don't want to overtake them."

"Sounds good," nodded Jester. He turned to the others. "Make sure packs are full for the run back."

Fives moved back onto the darkness of the patio.

They made their preparations quickly then woke Sinker. It was the dark before dawn as they simply walked out the front door. Pink grey lines streaked through the dim night low on the horizon. Kix had control of the stretcher and even as they gently placed Cut on it, he had grunted softly and spoke. Though no one understood his mumble.

"Probably don't drop me," muttered Jester as he laid a hand on Cut's arm. "We're going home, Cut."

"They moved quickly in the silence of early dawn, Dek and the girl running with them, slower and slower, hoping to be unnoticed. Quad and Waxer slowed with them, blasters at the ready.

"Is this a good place for you to go?" asked Waxer.

She kept her eyes on them, the frown that hadn't left her face all evening, deepening further as she stepped with her back against a wall.

Dek glanced around. "No, but just a little further."

"Dek, don't you understand?" she hissed as she backed away from them. "They are going to kill us. They have to so we don't tell anyone about them."

Dek's face twisted in pain and Quad answered his fear.

"No. We aren't going to kill you. Yes, we're concerned that you'll tell people, but we were sick of killing a long time ago. It's why we're no longer stormtroopers. We came to get our brother and take him home. He has younglings. About your age." His velvet brown eyes met her crystal bright blue one. "You're far more likely to kill us."

"If you feel safe enough here," offered Waxer. "We'll just go."

"Yes," she hissed. "Just go." It was clear she didn't believe they'd simply go.

"Good to know you, Dek." Quad nodded at the boy then the girl. "Ma'am."  The girl jerked in surprise and Waxer laughed softly.

"We've known since before we rescued you. It's in the way you stand, the line of your throat, your forehead, your jaw. It was the way you sipped the water and how you touched Dek on the shoulder. You need a lot more practice before you can pass as a boy."

She frowned softly. "But you didn't… none of you…"

"The sewers might be safe." Waxer said, changing the subject. "If they really do burn out the city. It's how we got in, probably how we'll get out." He looked at the girl. "My adopted daughter is a lot like you. That's why I couldn't let you die." He glanced down at the boy with a smile. "Dek, don't take this the wrong way but you remind me of my brothers."

"I'm Sharn," she said softly and Waxer nodded. "Waxer." He gave a small gesture of his hand at his chest. "Take care, Sharn."

He turned and ran to catch up with his brothers.

* * *

** Cut Comes Home **

They moved swiftly through the city, Boil and Waxer shifting as point with Fives and Sinker bringing up the rear with the military blasters. They'd taken Cut from the stretcher and carried him through the drainage sewers below the line of guards. In the park at the edge of Issuya, they once again assembled the stretcher and gently laid him on it. He was awake now; though they could tell by his expressions that he was confused. His lips moved, but no words came out. They spoke to him, quietly, as they moved along at a trooper's pace past the farmland of Saleucami.

"We're going home, Cut." Jester's voice was the first to speak. He'd been with Cut the longest and he noticed Cut's unspoken word. _Home_. The shape his lips made and his weak smile as he recognized what that word represented. He moved to the forward position now they were in the countryside, Fives slowed to cover their tracks, to make sure no one followed. He'd be another day before he returned to the farm.

"You'll be fine, Cut." Kix said as he ran alongside the stretcher. "You're weak now from being ill and in a coma for several days. It will take you a while to regain your full strength, but you'll be fine."

Quad moved to the other side of the stretcher. "Shaeeah and Jek have been worried about you. They'll be so happy to see you. Even Keeli has asked about you… as much as a toddler can. He's back in the main house with Sula and Saria since we got immunized."

"Suu?" It was the barest whisper of a question, unheard but the men beside him saw his lips and his questioning eyes.

Boil answered him. "She's physically well, in spite of nursing ill men. She's still in isolation at Jester's." Cut's brows drew down and Boil shrugged and continued speaking. "You know she's been in isolation this entire time, Cut."

Cut turned his head then returned it to look at Boil, but it was Waxer who continued speaking.

"No?" asked Waxer. "Guess she didn't want you to worry. But she was in isolation, then Crux became ill on her last day. She, Shy and Kix nursed him and, when he died, she was in isolation again with Kix and Shy. Then Djinn and Riven became ill and she nursed them. She's been in isolation or nursing ever since she came back from Issuya."

"You probably would have realized that if you hadn't been ill." Kix added. "Don't let it worry you overmuch. Confusion is normal coming out of a coma."

"Suu. Not. Me." Cut's whispered words were more emphatic.

Jester shook his head. "That's Suu's call, Cut. I don't think it would be safe for me to get between you two."

Cut was quiet for a while, his eyes closed and he seemed to sleep while they ran. After a while he opened his eyes and stared at Jester.

"Please."

Jester sighed. "I'll do what I can.

Suu was waiting by his house as Jester, moving a little faster, came through the forest. She stood as he slowed down, not coming within five meters of her. She gave a crooked smile.

"Cut told you to send me away, didn't he?"

"He's worried for you, Suu. That's all."

She nodded. "I asked Djinn and Riven to relocate the isolation tent next to large bedroom. If you put him in there, I'll be able to look in the window and see him."

"He'll be able to see you, too." Jester smiled broadly. "He's already conscious and coherent. Kix says it will be a while before he regains his strength, but the immunizations worked." He glanced back. "I can hear them coming, Suu. Go on to that back window."

"Three days," said Suu as she stood and moved toward the back of the house. "And not an instant longer." She paused at the corner of the house. "Jester, some of the men have gone to help Cass Cjain. She's ill also. It was decided that they should take the outer ring considering they'll be contagious."

She glanced away from his face to see the men running in line with the stretcher. "It wasn't a decision made by Cody or Rex or me or Saria. It was their choice." The men stopped at the proper distance and Kix turned the stretcher so Cut could see her. She bit her lower lip at his pale thinness, at how weak he looked.

Cut smiled and her tears overflowed.


	14. Cass Cjain

**Cass Cjain**

Cody stared at the fire. It was a bad habit for a trooper, destroying night vision and blinding him if there was an attack. A trooper could be dead before his night vision returned. Cody gave a grunt in the back of his throat. He wasn't on guard duty at the moment and none of the drifters on Saleucami had made it past the outer ring before being turned back. Fire had a friendliness to it; a warmth that was beyond the physical heat and was a good medium for reflection. Cody bowed his head. He wasn't a trooper anymore, nor a commander and the future spread before him like the vast ocean of Kamino - fathomless, unknown and, Cody admitted truthfully, just a bit scary. He had enjoyed being a soldier; at least when he had believed that it was the soldiers who brought peace and enforced the rules of democracy. _Disillusionment was good for the soul,_ Cody decided, _it makes you rethink your life_. Cody rubbed his fingers against the bridge of his nose then held them to the flames warming his palms. He wanted to help his brothers; both the ones that had escaped and the ones that hand not yet realized that escape was possible. There would be rebellion against the Empire. Cody knew that, he'd studied histories of wars. He wondered if the emperor had ever studied war. Cody thought not otherwise he would realize that the strict imposition after the freedoms of the Republic would only bring rebellion.

Cody heard the small group of men as they came to the fire. Edge sat across from him at the campfire and Jesse stood behind him, in support. Baffle and Riposte also sat. Support positions were almost instinctive. Jesse agreed totally with Edge while Baffle and Riposte had very similiar objectives with only minor changes. Cody could see that in the way they sat and he gave a small smile. He hoped that all his brothers would go places with at least one other brother. They'd be lost without someone to understand them. For a moment it flashed through his head that he hadn't planned to include anyone else in his tentative plans.

"I spoke with Jester," began Edge. "He went to Cass Cjain's house before going to Issuya. Cut and Suu don't count her as a friend and, after recent events, neither do Jester or Saria."

Cody nodded. "I've heard." He looked into Edge's silver-blue eyes, a rare permitted mutation from the vat of Kaminoan perfection. 'Ghost eyes' some of the clones had called that particular mutation, though he hadn't heard the term since they'd landed on Saleucami.

"But she is a neighbor. Jester went to check on her," there was a momentary tightening of Edge's lips, "after Crux died. He said she complained of a headache. That's the first symptom of red shadow virus."

"We'd like permission to check on her. Surreptitiously if you think best; though we'd prefer to introduce ourselves." Baffle's words were softer than Edge's.

"If she doesn't die." Cody poked a stick into the fire sending a small spray of fireseeds into the air and watched the dissipate into nothing. "The death rate is high and chances are she won't survive if she's ill."

Baffle nodded thoughtfully.

Edge dropped his head to stare at something in the fire then nodded. "If she doesn't die."

"We'll isolate ourselves," Riposte added, both hands palm out reach towards Cody; offering as well as asking. "In case we become contagious and we'll take over the outer ring watch as well."

"Now that we're immunized, it doesn't make sense to isolate individual clones if they meet up with drifters. We'll just consider the outer ring and Cass Cjain as in isolation. That should protect the others." Edge continued. "Jester's can be for the men returning from Issuya and caring for Cut and Sinker." There was the implied assumption that Cut, and maybe Sinker, would be the last ones ill. It was a hope that no one would speak of.

Cody looked at them. "She'll figure out who and what we are quickly."

"If she dies, it won't matter." Edge said with a shrug. "Even if she survives she might think it was only Jester and Cut. Kix and Saria say the high fever causes hallucinations."

Jesse rubbed his arm where Kix had taken blood. "If she survives possibly Saria and Kix can make a vaccine from her blood? For everyone else." It was a partial statement, partial question and a good suggestion.

Cody sighed. He didn't want to complicate matters by permitting some of the men access to Cass, but it wasn't his call anymore. "What about anyone else? Have you invited, say, Chopper or Checkout to help at Cass's?"

There was an uncomfortable silence.

"No." Edge stated it flatly, in tones of finality and Cody wondered why. Simply group dynamics? Were the men splitting up into groups who would stay or go together? Was it something they all knew on some level; that without a brother they were sure to suffer?

"They'll find out." Cody saw Edge shrug.

"Probably. It won't matter. They can ask to help then. If she's alive. If there's anything else that needs help by then."

Cody nodded. "Why are you asking me?" His voice was soft and he had a slight grin on his face.

"You're …" Edge smiled then changed what he was saying. "Not the commander anymore."

"And I have no right to tell you what to do or what not to do. I can only offer advice. As a suggestion, talk to Saria and Suu about Cass. I'm sure there are things you might need to know; things they'll want you to know." Cody looked at them. "They might have reasons to tell you to stay away. They live here and plan to continue living here with their husbands. That might be reason enough to stay away."

Baffle nodded. Edge only looked into the fire – a bad habit for a trooper.

* * * * * * * * * *

Cass huddled in her bed with blankets and quilts covering her head. It still didn't stop the shivering, the chills. It didn't stop the pain or the headache or the cramps in her fingers and feet. It didn't stop the loneliness. Tears flowed. She wished _he_ were here. A more objective part of her mind reminded her that _he_ wasn't that attentive when _he_ was there. She wanted to be held.

There was a knock on the door – tentative and gentle. Then she heard the door open. She hoped it was _him_ then she remembered _he_ didn't knock.

"Cass?" It was Jester's voice. Mostly.

"I'm sick, Jester. I think it's the virus." It was kind of Jester to check on her.

"We know, Cass. I've got some supplies for your kitchen. Would you like me to bring you some water or tea? Something to eat?"

He'd said 'we'. That meant that Saria knew he was there, knew he was being kind. Cass sniffled, only partly due to fever. She'd been so cold and impersonal at the clinic; almost rude in confirming Cass' pregnancy and offering no congratulations or much needed advice or even more-needed friendship. Jester had probably talked her into letting him come to check on her. Jester, at least, was kind. "I'm not hungry but tea would be good. Just leave it at the door. You shouldn't get sick."

"I'll heat you some soup too. You'll need a little nourishment."

She didn't feel like eating; not even soup. He made noises in the kitchen though it sounded more like two or three people. She didn't think Saria would come; maybe it was one of Cut's kids. The door opened and Jester carried a tray he set on the dresser.

"You're not Jester." She pulled the blankets closer. He was like Cut and Jester's twin. He lacked Cut's mahogany-shaded hair and Jester's scar though he had a Bendu tattooed outlined in scars on one side of his head and face.

"No, I'm Jesse." He had the golden brown eyes of both his brothers though he didn't raise his eyes from the tray for more than a guilty instant.

Her lips tightened. "Another one of Cut's brothers? How many brothers are there?"

He paused and licked his lips then avoided her question. "There's me and another here to help you right now. You have plenty of wood at the moment, but we'll be cutting some more. Your kitchen is fully stocked. You'll hear us out in the garden." His lips twitched into an almost smile. "I think we can figure out the weeds from the vegetables." He turned toward her and did smile. "You rest, Cass."

She leaned back into her pillow and the blankets then turned, pulling the quilts closer to her. She didn't care about Cut's brothers.

 _He_ did though. _He_ cared a great deal about Cut's brothers.

* * *

** Choice **

Cass knew now that _he_ 'd been right. There were more of them than just Cut and Jester. She caught glimpses of them as they cut firewood for her each day and brought supplies into her kitchen. They were all different in spite of being identical. There was Jesse and his Bendu. Another one had beautiful silver eyes and a tattoo above an eyebrow, a third smiled often, another had a scar on his cheek.

They made soup and brought it to her door. They bothered her with demands that she eat. Not that she was hungry. It was rare that she ate. There seemed to be no reason to eat. She was going to die; the chills that shivered in her body told her that. The wretched cramping twists of her hands told her that. The hallucinations told her that. Most of the time she wondered if they were hallucinations; but the tea wasn't. At night there was silence and they were gone.

They bothered her dying with demands that she talk to them, that she let them know what she needed. They would not let her die in peace. Sometimes she thought she was being held, but that couldn't be right. No one in their right mind would hold a woman in the throes of plague. She'd lost the pregnancy sometime in the third night; racked with fever, chills and hallucinations. The tiny shape that had slipped from her body had been pathetically small. She wasn't going to cry over it, she decided. Cass hadn't been sure at all whether she was going to keep it anyway. She had wanted to talk with _him_ to discuss the matter but _he_ hadn't visited for a while. It no longer mattered.

In a quiet moment of clarity she left a note one evening, asking them to dig a small hole in the garden at the base of the goldenfruit tree. One of Jester's brothers had done so. A small, neat hole lined in roofing slates, as though he'd known. Cass buried the potential, wrapped in one of her best silk scarves, and told herself she wasn't going to cry over a tiny clutch of flesh that could barely be identified as human. Tears poured from her eyes and the burning knot in her throat loosened. _Just the sickness_ , she told herself.

"I'm sorry." It seemed to be only a soft breeze from the forest. She ignored it as she trudged back to the house, a shiver in her body telling her another period of chills and pain was coming. She didn't die, but something in her had. She certainly didn't feel as if she were alive.

There seemed to be no reason to eat, to talk, to move. It was so much easier to simply lie in bed; to huddle in the blankets and not think. Jesse and his brothers did not allowed her the peace she craved but they did walked quietly, when they made soup and tea for her.

 _He_ came back. Not for her; and Cass knew that for certain because _he_ came back in armor carrying his weapons. _He_ came back in the stillness of night, slowly, cautiously like a predator. _He_ came back grinning as she struggled to breath, struggled against _his_ strength. Her first notice _he_ was in her room was the suffrocating struggle to wake.

"Did you deed me the house?" she asked after _he_ removed his hand from her mouth. As always, _he_ seemed to fill the house with his presence. _He_ was big; looming over her like the doom of forever, taking up more room; pushing her out of occupying her own life. She had liked that before, liked _his_ larger-than-life presence. _He_ was beautiful with long, golden hair and eyes the muted lavender color of flowers. _He_ moved like a dancer, physical perfection in motion. She had thought she loved _him_.

 _He_ laughed. "I don't even own it. It's a loan from someone who owes me."

"Then what was I for?" Oddly, she wasn't even surprised anymore; she was too tired and worn out to care. She had only thought she loved _him_ but she had love the house. At first it had been a promise of a life together, later it became her comfort for a promise broken.

"Pleasure and bait." _He_ glared at her. "You weren't much good at either."

She'd moved back to the bedroom slipping between the covers. _His_ words had hurt more than the fever and the chills. None of this was her concern. Though she hadn't realized it before, none of this had ever been her concern. She wanted to cry but there were no more tears.

 _He_ woke her again when the soft twilight of Saleucami night gave way to the early morning.

"Get up and go outside," _he_ told her. "Do some work. Move around. Bring firewood into the house or something. Keep busy."

It was easier to follow _his_ orders than to voice dissent or ask questions. She moved slowly, her tired body feeling older than she believed possible. Cass wondered if you could be dead and still move. She thought so. She certainly felt dead. Cass picked up a shawl and tucked it over her shoulders. She was cold, as cold as clay.

 _He_ moved into the shed and she knew it was because there were no windows there, no possibility of anyone catching a quick glimpse of _him_ as _he_ waited.

As Cass walked in the garden, checking the work the brothers had done, she paused for a moment, shocked into stillness as she noticed a bit of new greenery on the small grave. Tears she thought she no longer had glistened in her eyes. She bent, pulled a missed weed and when she looked again at the base of the goldenfruit tree, the small plant was still there. She turned toward the woodpile.

Cass picked up some smaller logs from the wood pile and heard a small noise as she began the short walk to the door of the house. At the edge of the property were two of Jester's brothers. She recognized Jesse from the large tattoo and scars across his face and head. The other she didn't recognize. She didn't think she'd seen him before, but he gave her a smile. She didn't smile back. She didn't have any smiles left and trying to form one shouldn't be wasted on someone who would soon be dead.

 _He_ came out the shed door, blasters in hand and ordered them closer. She simply moved into the kitchen with her load of wood. Two small logs fell from her arms onto the floor but she ignored them as she dropped the remainder into the woodbox by the fireplace. She returned to the kitchen, opening the screened door to continue picking up wood. _He_ had told her to keep busy.

 _He_ moved in front of her, blocking her. Certainly not to protect her, she knew that now. Her brows came down in concentration. So she wouldn't interfere? As if she could do anything to make a difference.

 _He_ kept his blasters trained on the two men as _he_ angrily asked questions. Where were the others? How many were there? Something about perimeters. Jester's brothers meant money for _him_. Lethargy gave way to a tiny ember of anger.

What had _he_ done?

 _He_ had promised, oh yes, but they'd been empty promises. _He_ promised the house, promised to cut firewood, promised to stone pave the walkway. Even little promises were nothing to _him_ – promises to stay the night, to sit with her by the fireplace, to drive into Issuya with her.

Cass didn't remember having the thick stick in her hand;  she didn't eve remember picking up one sturdy log from the kitchen floor. Rough bark scraped against her palm.

Jester's brothers had promised nothing; they had tried to slip through her notice like ghosts. But they had been the ones to bring supplies in from the shed. They'd been the ones to chop firewood, to dig a small grave, to weed her small garden. Cass wondered if they had diverted drifters and didn't doubt it. For her they'd given up anonymity, they'd given up being ghosts. They had trusted her with their existence.

Her face twisted in a frown as she brought up the small log and swung it at _him_. _He_ noticed her movement from the corner of his eye, and ducked with a curse. _He_ was a bounty hunter, a trained fighter and big. Oddly, _he_ didn't loom over her life anymore. _He_ was merely big.

Jester's two brothers acted immediately and in concert with each other, separating and rushing forward to attack. _His_ hand swung around, a heavy blaster in _his_ fist, and caught her upside the head as she brought the piece of wood back for another swing. She heard the crackle of blaster fire and a cry from one of Jester's brothers. Pain splintered into stars and the stars merely splintered further into darkness.

* * * * * * * * * *

"Cass?"

It was a gentle voice, low and questioning. Jester's voice – almost. No, Jesse's voice, she absently identified.

"Cass, are you alright?" Insistent, as he had been in urging her to eat soup and drink the tea he'd made. As he had been in urging her to live.

A coolness dabbed at the side of her face. It felt like her skull had split. She gave a shuddering breath. Gentle hands tucked blankets around her. Strong fingers tentatively touched her face, brushed back a lock of hair that had been tickling her cheek, combed softly through her hair. It felt comfortable and she felt herself crying again.

"I'll be right here, Cass. If you need anything, just moan."

She tried to smile but she was tired.

When she woke again, she allowed one eye to sliver open to see, then shut it again. One of Jester's brothers was at the bedside; not Jesse with his scarred tattoo and not the quiet one with the beautiful silver-blue eyes. The one with a scar on his cheek.

"Sleep as long as you need to Cass. You've had a rough time."

"All ok?" Her voice was a croak and he held a glass to her lips, effortlessly cradling her shoulders and head; waiting until she'd taken several small sips.

"We are all fine." He emphasized 'we' and she didn't ask. "Jesse and Countdown are a little bruised around the edges. The blast skimmed Countdown's arm, but a little bacta and he'll be fine. He's disappointed he couldn't stay here. You've got a concussion and a cut down the side of your face."

"Don't bury him near…" she whispered.

"We won't. Rest now."

She couldn't yet. "Names? Jesse. Bendu. Eyes?"

"That's Edge."

"Smiles lot?"

"That would be Baffle."

She touched his face, her fingers caressing the old scar on his cheekbone and he swallowed. Her fingers dropped to the bed.

"I'm Riposte." He gently lowered her head back to the pillow and brought the quilt around her shoulders.

 _How odd_ , she thought as she drifted into sleep. _Such wonderful, beautiful, odd names_.


	15. Home

**Home**

It was a day of celebration. Quarantine ended for the men at Jester's house and the women in the farm house. Suu was the second to act on it in the early morning.

Cut & Suu

Suu had barely moved away from the window overlooking Cut for the three days the men were in isolation. He was mostly coherent the first couple of hours but too weak to do more than look at her. His face looked so old, so lined in pain that it was all she could do not to cry.

Kix and Jester kept him company the most, telling him what had happened in the last two weeks or spoon-feeding him soup, but Sinker and Quad also spent a lot of time with Cut. Shaeeah visited Jester's house daily, mostly her father through the window, but sometimes Quad at a distance or Boil and Waxer with Numa. Jek didn't visit at all.

"I'm too busy, Shaeeah," he'd tell his sister and it was true that he spent a lot of time in the fields. His uncles helped, but they told her and Suu that he often preferred to be by himself.

On the third day, with no signs of red shadow virus, Suu simply moved into Jester's house, walking past Boil, who held a box in his hand and was contemplating cooking cereal grain for breakfast and Waxer at the table with a cup of caf in front of him. Both men grinned at her and Waxer raised his cup in salute.

Fives was playing a game of solitary while Quad lounged on the sofa.

"Morning, Suu," murmured Fives. "It's a beautiful day."

"Indeed it is," smiled Suu. "You'll be seeing Sula and the peach later today?"

Fives only grinned as he began stacking the deck in a pile. There was no need to play cards while one of his wives waited for him. He handed the cards to Quad. "I'm going to go see if my wife is awake." He glanced at Suu with kindred anticipation as he stood and turned toward the kitchen. "She's not quite the early riser you are but maybe I can convince her today is worth it."

"Or you can take the peach and let her sleep," suggested Suu.

"Good Idea, Suu." Fives was out the door.

Kix was silently sitting in a chair next to the bed. Cut was sitting up, leaning against some pillows. His eyes crinkled in joy as his wife came into the room.

"I thought you'd grab me at the door." Suu chided.

"I had planned to," grinned Cut, ravaged lines still on his face. "But Kix said if I stayed in bed until you got here, he'd let you scrub my back while taking a shower."

Kix shrugged. "I don't think he's strong enough to manage a shower by himself, Suu, but I did promise him …" Kix blushed, his ears flamed and his cheeks went bright with embarrassment. "I said…" He scowled and Cut laughing, rescued him.

"He promised solitude, Suu. Curtains drawn and door closed and no interruptions for the rest of the day."

"After the shower, you have to stay in bed," ordered Kix.

"I couldn't have said it any better." Cut grinned and held out his hand for Suu to join him. His fingers were thinner and his hand trembled slightly but he wrapped his arm around her as she sat at his side; they wrapped themselves in each other and the outside world ceased to exist.

Still blushing, Kix left the room with a few words. "Someone will be in the house if you need help so just yell." He wasn't sure if they heard him.

Waxer & Boil

Numa and Shaeeah came together, hand in hand, with baskets of fresh nuna eggs and vegetables to cook for the men.

" _Nerra_ Boil, _Nerra_ Waxer." Numa smiled as they entered the kitchen. Boil hugged Numa tightly as she entered the door.

" _A'lu a'hr,"_ he murmured softly in her ear. Waxer, caf in hand, stood for his own welcome. Shaeeah gave him a small hug of welcome then moved to the stove.

"I suppose mom and dad are busy?" she smirked then smiled as she rolled her eyes. "They're supposed to be too old for _that_ sort of thing."

Quad laughed as he came into the kitchen, attracted by the noise of more people than Boil and Waxer. "I get the feeling there's no such thing as too old for _that_ sort of thing."

Shaeeah gave him a hug around the waist, putting the side of her face against his chest to listen to his heartbeat. "I'm glad." He bent his head down as she looked up and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"You haven't cooked breakfast yet, have you?" ask Numa as she moved from Boil to Waxer.

Waxer shook his head at her then clasped Numa in his arms. "Only three days, Numa. Three days and my heart aches for not seeing you."

Numa nodded. "My heart began sorrowing the moment you left the camp." She brightened. "We have brought the freshest eggs for you, the best forest mushrooms, vegetables that were plants until this morning. Aureki even packed some spices for the omelets we're going to try to make." She gave a chagrinned smile. "Though it will probably turn out to be scramble instead of omelet. This morning we will cook for you; saving you from Checkout's brefkast."

"Brefkast?" Waxer's eyebrows went up.

"That's what the troopers are calling it," quipped Numa as she picked up a knife and cutting board.

"Or brick-fast" added Shaeeah as she pulled some bowls and plates from the shelves. "He's improved but not much and now Backup is helping him."

Waxer nodded. "He was shamed when he volunteered to go to Issuya and we wouldn't accept him."

"As he should have been," said Boil. "As he should have been."

Dare

Dare smiled. It was a small smile, barely more than the curl and slight opening of his lips, but it was unmistakably an engaging smile and not the grimace he'd had when his jaw had been firmly set. He opened his lips, just the smallest bit, just enough for a small bite of food. He moved his jaw, ever so slightly. He breathed deeply then sighed, blowing air out of his open lips.

Saria had broken her isolation and, with Edge's help, replaced the wires two days ago with what she called flexibands. She had said his jaw was healing properly and, after he winced as she touched his skin; that it was unlikely any facial nerves were damaged. She seemed pleased with her work.

Pleased! Dare laughed, a small noise from deep in his chest that bubbled out of his lips and sounded more natural, more normal than the past … how long … years of imprisonment and weeks of a broken jaw. When he was totally healed, he was going to ask everyone to tell him jokes so he could laugh; loud and long and hard. "Pleased" did not begin to describe his feelings. He was ecstatic!

Today he could have solid food, Saria had promised. She had him use the straw and nutritional supplement for the day after surgery and had prohibited him from speaking. He followed her direction explicitly now.

Aureki had seen him by the house yesterday after surgery, where he normally was, trying to stay as near Sula as possible. She kept him from falling into a deep depression, radiating peace and contentment for him. Aureki told him that the girls planned a special breakfast at Jester's house. He'd looked for and found Numa and had written the word in the dirt with a finger. _Breakfast?_ She had nodded.

"Jester's, shortly after dawn tomorrow," she'd said in her low voice. "We'll cook for you, you need to put on some weight and Checkout wouldn't be able to manage that."

Dare had nodded and tapped his chest with his fingers. Then he remembered she was a scout and gave her the hand signals. V _ictory. Rendezvous_. She smiled.

They were in the kitchen, he could hear their voices and laughter and the lesser sound of food cooking. He could smell the heady scent of solid food and his stomach gave a lurch of anticipation. It didn't seem right to simply walk in though he'd been invited, so he knocked softly on the door. Kix opened it and handed Dare a cup of caf.

"I recall you like it dark and sweet," he smiled.

"Yes," said Dare softly, returning the smile though not as wide. He glanced at the table and nodded to Sinker. "Good to see you, Sinker. I'm glad you made it." He wasn't loud, but it was more than a whisper.

Sinker nodded as he held out his arm for Dare to clasp then glanced toward Kix.

"He has aphasia, Dare. Difficulty speaking, understanding the written word, numbers, directions." Kix took a drink of his own caf and turned his attention back to Sinker. "We'll talk with Saria later today to see if there's some kind of therapy that'll help, but truthfully Sinker, I'm not optimistic."

Sinker grinned and touched his chest. "Am," he declared emphatically. "All. Scape."

Dare nodded. "I tink I'll be I'll be optimistic, too."

"What would you like in your scramble?" Shaeeah was at the stove with two eggs in one hand and a spatula in the other.

"Hot spices, Treaded nerf jerky." His voice had sounded a little odd, constrained by the flexibands, and _shen_ was a lost cause, but Shaeeah nodded her understanding. She cracked the eggs into a small bowl, added a little blue milk and some spices. He moved closer to watch her cook. It was an important skill to learn. All the troopers had vowed to learn after the very first day of Checkout's cooking.

"More," he told her in his quiet voice, standing behind her looking over her shoulder. "Very hot."

Shaeeah turned and handed him the bowl of pepperspice. "Spice it yourself."

He poured a heaping spoon of the pepperspice into the frothy egg mix and watched her lips pucker. She didn't say anything as she whipped up the eggs and slid them onto the heated metal plate. When the eggs had barely turned solid, Shaeeah added the shredded meat and some white, creamy substance that started to melt.

"What's dat?" Dare couldn't yet say his _trill_ s, but Saria had warned him that _trill_ along with _shen_ and a few other letters would be difficult to pronounce until the flexibands had dissolved, so he wasn't alarmed.

"Yai-yai. Saria said it would be good for you and Jester said he had some that we could use." Shaeeah moved the spatula in a crisp movement but the omelet disintegrated. Shaeeah sighed and quickly stirred it into a scramble. "It's just for you and no one else."

Dare nodded. He'd heard of yai-yai; it was a nutrient-dense, high calorie Mandalorian food.

"Where is Jester?" Kix looked around. "He can't still be asleep, can he?" All the men who'd been in Issuya, except Jester and Cut, were sitting at the table with unfinished food and caf or leaning against the wall. Everyone knew where Cut and Suu were.

Quad laughed. "He was gone at midnight to visit Saria."

"They were at the front porch this morning, wrapped up in a blanket." Shaeeah handed Dare the plate, the egg scrambled soft and still moist, the nerf jerky shredded thin. He closed his eyes and lifted the plate to his nose. The scent was tantalizing, more so than any other food he'd ever had the pleasure to smell.

He sat at the table, Waxer vacating a chair for him, and lifted a small forkful of scramble to his open lips. Heaven! It was pure pleasure, the eggs nicely salty and hot with the spices that tickled the back of his throat, the nerf requiring only the barest nibble before swallowing. He held the egg on his tongue for a moment, pressing it up to his palate, before swallowing.

"And his first words after eating real food are …" introduced Quad with humor in his amber eyes.

"Paradise," mumbled Dare. "I have died and gone to paradise."

Numa gave him a quick hug as did Shaeeah. Waxer, right behind him, slapped him lightly on the shoulder. Sinker nodded and tapped his arm with a fist. The others, brothers who had seen his hardship with the broken jaw, applauded and laughed in delight.

"Paradise," said Quad as he lifted his cup for a toast.

"Paradise,"

* * *

**Home II**

It was a day of celebration. Quarantine ended for the men at Jester's house and the women. Suu was the second to act on it in the early morning but Jester was the first.

Jester & Saria

Jester had woken at midnight as he'd meant to. It was why he'd chosen to sleep on the sofa in the office, disturbing only Quad in the living room as he silently slipped from the house. Quad had opened an eye, then both as he watched Jester leave. A smile of comprehension came over his face as Jester pointed out the chronometer. Quad closed his eyes and returned to the peace of sleep. The little house was quiet as he shut the front door carefully, everyone asleep as the last night in quarantine slowly ended. Almost everyone had plans for tomorrow – playing chase with the younglings, soaking in the hot pool or talking with the women as they hoped for a soft hug. He knew Kix was planning to take up most of Saria's day and Jester wanted his time in with her. Uninterrupted time. Quiet time. Time to tell her how much he loved her, how much he appreciated her, how badly he wanted her. Time to softly run his fingers on her skin, to hear her voice, to taste her lips with his own.

Technically, and only technically, it was the day the quarantine ended for him and the others who'd gone to Issuya. Technically. It was past the middle of night. Technically. It was dawning the new day. He loped through the woods, almost as quiet as the night's shadow. He saw one of his brothers watching for drifters and waved. . He smiled as he reached the front porch of Cut's house. Cut was weak and thin; but he was alive, awake and no longer ill. All he needed was time and Suu.

Saria was a bundle curled up on the porch, snoring softly. Jester grinned. He'd always known _she_ was the one to snore.

"Saria," he called in a loud whisper; hopefully to not wake anyone except her. "Saria!" It took several more tries.

"Mmm. What, Jester?" She was awake and smiled at him, her hand reaching out.

"It's past midnight. Quarantine is over today. Is there any particular time or can I come up and hold you now?"

She yawned. "How do you feel? Any tickling in the throat? Any headache or chills? Any of that in the house when you left?"

Jester shook his head. "I don't know about headaches, but no coughing, no chills. Last night everyone was feeling good, anticipating today."

Saria smiled back. "But not as much as you." She gestured with her fingers and Jester came closer. He sat beside her and pulled on her pillow.

"What are you doing?" she asked petulantly, slowly releasing the pillow to his insistent fingers.

"I get the pillow." He grinned.

"And what do I get?" Her green eyes almost glowed in the moons' light, her hair paler and lighter in the monochrome dimness.

He lay down beside her, tucking the pillow under his head and pulling her against him. Her head was on his arm, her back against his chest and his hands swept around her to caress her pregnant belly.

"Me, Saria. You get all of me. My body, my heart, my life, my mind. Do clones have souls? You get that as well." He bent his head into the curve of her neck. "I love you, Saria."

"I love you, Jester." She turned, facing him, curling into the circle of his arms.

Cass Cjain & Clones (Jesse, Edge, Baffle, Riposte)

Cass stretched and yawned. She caught herself before the yawn stretched too far into the cut on her face. They'd tended it, using skin glue to hold the edges of the skin together. One of the clones had come from Jester's house and tended it. They said he was a medic. He'd been shy and self-effacing at meeting her, but his hands had been skilled as they tended her face. "It will leave a thin scar," he'd said mournfully. "I know women don't like scars but it will fade in time and mostly it's right near your hairline. It will be almost invisible."

"That's all right." She had reached up to touch her face but he caught her hand in his and held it, gently placing it back in her lap. "It will remind me what a dummy I am when it comes to men."

He'd given her a small smile as he glanced down at the floor, then at the closed door behind which they could hear his brothers in the small hallway, from the corners of his eyes – a look only she noticed. "I don't think that will be much of a problem anymore." He'd said quietly.

Cass smiled. He'd been right. They'd stayed with her; Jesse, Baffle, Riposte and Edge. At first she thought it was just because of the epidemic and the need to remain in isolation. The first day she had figured out differently when the medic came then left the house. She'd found out differently when Jesse spoke of leaving and the others had looked at her warmly, declaring their preference to stay. Originally she'd thought they had only meant 'stay on Saleucami'. Her very reasonable excuses for her obtuseness including the medication, the epidemic, and getting hit in the head.

It had been Edge with his beautiful silver eyes, who had approached her, pulling a chair into her bedroom and closing the door behind him. "There's confusion," his words had been brusque and she thought he was angry. "You don't appear to understand and we don't know how to tell you." He set the chair next to her bed. "If you permit, we four would like to court you. Jesse would like the practice but ultimately plans to leave Saleucami. I plan to stay on Saleucami. Baffle and Riposte don't know." He looked into her eyes. She blinked, fairly stunned by his declaration. "It depends on whether or not you accept either or both. If you have questions, you can ask any one of us." She didn't realize it then, but it had been a long speech for Edge. He'd taken the chair and left the room, pulling the door quietly shut behind him.

"Awake?" The voice beside her was low and husky, his body warm. He reached, rubbing her back with his big, calloused hand. She turned toward him and smiled.

"Where's the rest of the pack?" She called them a pack and included herself because they slept tumbled on her bed; because there was a recognizable Alpha – Edge, because they listened to her, because they did things together.

"Edge went back to the barn for the day. He's looking forward to chase. Jesse is cooking breakfast and from the smell of things is doing ok; nothing's burning. Baffle is probably taking a shower." He listened for a moment, as did Cass, and both heard the water. "Shower," nodded Riposte then he grinned. "And I have the best part, keeping you company." Tentatively he leaned his face closer, his lips parting softly, his strong arm pulling her closer. She tilted her face up, meeting his lips with her own.

* * * * * * * * * *

"It's not my house. I don't know how long I'll be able to stay." Cass bowed her head. "I thought it was mine, but I was lied to." Her words trailed into nothing as she inspected her lunch. Riposte had made nerf jerky sandwiches served with fresh golden fruit. The golden fruit was getting overripe but jiqui was coming into season.

"That's even better," said Baffle with a smile. "I've been helping Jester a lot with some work he's been doing on his house and I think we could design and build something more to our liking." He grinned and glanced at the other men. "Maybe even closer to the thermal pool?" There was general agreement to that idea.

Cass shook her head. "That's Suu's property. They don't like me very much. Even if they would sell, I don't think I have sufficient credits to buy a portion of the land."

"And we're Cut's brothers. Family." Riposte took a bit of his last sandwich. "I'm going to love you dearly, Cass, but I have to say that Suu _does_ cook bread much better than anyone else." His statement caught her breath, snagging her heart on the way.

Jesse frowned. "Why don't they like you, Cass? Cut and Suu, I mean. I think we've figured out why Jester and Saria."

"Well, she was such a cold bi…" Cass looked around at the men. They were frowning but it was mostly confusion rather than anger. Cass swallowed her anger. If she thought about it, Saria's reactions actually made sense. "Jester apologized. I think I did too when I was sick, but I could apologize again." She glanced down then around with a tremulous smile. "I'd been told that he was no longer with Saria and I always thought he was attractive so…" She shrugged.

"You could always challenge her to one-on-one," said Baffle as he put the last plate in the sink.

Riposte shook his head. "It doesn't work like that for civilians, Baffle." He turned back to Cass. "Could you apologize to Cut and Suu? Or would you require an apology from them? They're family, Cass, and we won't give up on them. We'd prefer you to be friends." He sucked the last of the crumbs off his fingertips and gave her a lop-sided grin. "If only to get Suu's recipe for bread."

Cass held her hands in front of her, palms up. "I don't think there's much to apologize to Cut and Suu. I flirted with Cut a little, but I like flirting." She noticed they all seemed pleased at those words.

"We like flirting, too." Jesse gave her a brief smile. "At least, for as little of it that we've done we seem to like it." She laughed softly, stood and put her arms around his neck in a hug then she sat in her chair again.

"I can apologize to Cut and Suu for not being neighborly, I guess. The same for Saria and Jester." She chewed her lower lip slightly. "I can just stay away from Saria for the most part if she continues to be so cold."

Riposte shrugged. "We'll find out today." He offered his arm to Cass who stood. "We'll all be playing chase today and you need to be there to cheer us on." He was solemn as he looked at Cass. "Edge really loves chase. He'd be hurt if you weren't there to see him win. You do like him, don't you?"

"Does he always win?" She tilted her head as she looked up at Riposte.

"Pretty much," answered Jesse. "Are we even on the same team? I didn't ask Edge."

"If we aren't, then Cass has twice as much reason to cheer." Baffle gave a shrug of one shoulder.. "I still say one-on-one would be your best bet with Saria." He winked at Cass. "You've got reach on her."

Fives

Fives loped to the farm house easily. He saw Checkout and Backup in the back yard at the fire pit starting breakfast. Checkout saw him and waved; he waved back but passed the back yard for the front door.

Chopper was sitting beside the house, his legs drawn up and his arms resting on his knees. Fives slowed. "I would have thought you'd be at Jester's with Shaeeah and Numa cooking."

"I thought about it," Chopper grinned. "But Sula asked me to stay here until you showed up. And today, Aureki has decided to treat us all to -something called _tashki_. I suspect it's going to be delicious and I'm only hoping that Echo's appearance into the house isn't going to stall it for too long."

Fives laughed. "If he feels anything like me, you might not get to try _tashki_ until dinner tonight."

"I knew I should have intercepted him with a difficult question about field maneuvers in jet pack under variable gravity conditions." Chopper looked chagrinned.

"Wouldn't have slowed him down for more than an instant, Chopper, and he still would have given you the right answer." Fives shook his head as he looked down at the smiling man. Even now, Echo's memory amazed him. "He's got all those regs memorized."

Chopper sighed then shrugged and leaned against the wall. "You're here now, so I guess I'll go give Checkout a hand with breakfast."

Fives looked around and combed his hair back with his fingers. "This is where Dare sits, isn't it?"

"Not since yesterday. Sula asked him to leave, said he was too _jah-zeet_ to stay." Chopper grinned. "Does that mean 'eagerly anticipating'?"

Fives laughed, his hair shaking. "Close enough. She always told me it meant 'you're bugging me too much, go away'." Chopper laughed as well.

His expression sobered then. "She asked me to sit here. She seemed faded, tired and drawn out. If I could help by simply sitting here…." He shook his head slowly, his eyes looking worried. "She's been good to us, listened to us, touched us."

Fives nodded. "You are helping. Sula's been doing a lot lately. Mostly broadcasting and mostly for Dare but a little for all of us. And she's been busy with the peach. I'm sure Aureki and Saria helped but it isn't the same. You are providing her with…" Fives raised a hand and searched for the word. "Mental peace and clarity."

Chopper laughed in genuine amusement. "I never thought I'd heard those words in reference to myself."

Fives shrugged and grinned. "The most unexpected results, Chopper. I never thought to hear myself in reference to wives and children." Fives thought a moment. "Say, Chopper. Would you rather give me a hand?"

"Depends."

"I was going to take the peach away from Sula and finally give her some extended time away from the baby." Fives smiled lop-sidedly. "But I'd like to spend some time with her myself."

"I assume you mean Sula at the moment, not the baby."

"Both actually," admitted Fives. "But Sula first. Particularly in the morning when it's perfect to simply curl up with each other; particularly after a separation like this epidemic has imposed on us. Particularly when she's missing her sister and after she's been working steadily for so long." Fives expression had turned serious. "It's not good for her and she needs to … balance or readjust against me. You're good; the other day she said you were like stone. That is a compliment, by the way. Means 'steady', unmovable. But I am her husband."

Chopper nodded. "I'd be happy to carry the peach around for a while. I know she likes Sketch and both he and Edge adore her, so I'll take her up to the barn and us three uncles can try to spoil her rotten for you."

"Sound good, Chopper. I'll owe you one." Fives started to turn toward the front of the house. From the corner of his eye he saw Chopper shake his head.

"I don't know about that, Fives. Sula and I had an interesting conversation just before the quarantine." Chopper looked down at the ground. "We… touched. We hugged and kissed." Chopper turned red. "I told her I wanted to be part of her – your – family. When Saoha returns I will want to discuss it with all of you. I know Sketch also want to stay with Saoha. You. Us." He looked down at the grass, plucking a few blades.

Fives grinned and spoke softly. "You'd be welcome, Chopper. Both you and Sketch. When we got here, Sula and Saoha and I discussed adding to our family. I was so happy they would choose from my brothers. We were in agreement. We haven't discussed who, but I know that Saoha adores Sketch. She appreciates your restraint and strength of character. Though I don't know in what context. Sula is quieter, but when she called you a stone I knew that she wanted you in our family." He grinned. "There's a saying on Zeltros that every family needs a stone."

He reached out a hand to Chopper, pulling him from the ground into a quick hug. "Let's get the peach."

Chopper, Sketch & Edge

Fives came out of the house with baby peach in his arms. He smiled and cooed as her tiny hands reached for his face and his long hair. He took one of her fingers in between his lips and made slurping noises.

Chopper laughed as he held his arms out for the baby, like Sa had shown him; a hand cupping her shebs, her back along his forearm and her head in the crook of his elbow. He was surprised, but he'd missed her as well. He held her close, so she could hear his heartbeat. "It's pretty amazing to hear a big, tough ARC cooing at a baby."

Fives laughed as well. "You should have heard this big, tough ARC trooper singing to Sula's tummy when she was pregnant." He shook his head with a smile. "Just you wait, Chopper. You'll be doing the same in a few short years."

Chopper's breath caught. He knew he'd been invited into Fives' family; he knew but he had promised not to believe it until it was reality. That resolution simply crumbled. He wanted to say something to Fives, something to mark the moment when he truly believed that he'd be loved for the rest of his short life.

Fives may have seen it in his face, but he only touched Chopper on the shoulder. "Sula says to bring her back midmorning, she'll be hungry." Fives handed Chopper a small sack. "And this is for you, Sketch and Edge. A little gift from Aureki." He grinned and turned back to the house.

Chopper bent his head to the baby and she reached up, poking a finger into Chopper's nostril. He jerked his head back and she waved her hands making happy, garbling sounds. "So, little peach, you're now heavier than the DC 15A." Chopper gave her a tiny heft. "Almost up to a DC 17." he bent his head over her, letting her fingers grab his lips. "With scope and full power cartridge."

The barn door was open and Chopper could see Edge moving around, cleaning up some equipment from Dare's operation. Sketch was leaning back on his cot, his leg warmly wrapped, with lines of pain around his closed eyes.

"What happened?" Chopper tensed then relaxed as the peach squirmed with a soft noise.

Sketch shrugged and opened his eyes at peach's small noise. "A cramp in the leg. I'll be glad to be going back to the house and my place next to the stove." He smiled as he noticed Chopper's wriggling bundle. "It wasn't too bad and the only one since the first few days here. Give my leg a few moments, but I'd love to hold her for a while."

"Take the bag then. Edge, come on over here. Aureki sent us a treat." Sketch took the bag from Chopper's fingers who shifted his now-free arm against peach, rocking her softly. Edge came over, stopping to grab a chair for Chopper.

Sketch pulled out a pastry; flaky on the top and bottom, sticky, filled with nuts and bits of dried fruit. He handed it to Edge and pulled another one out for himself. He licked some of the stickiness. "Good," he reported to Edge and Chopper as he nodded. "Definitely on the really good side of cooking."

Edge nodded. His own mouth busy chewing. He swallowed and took a closer look at the interior as if he could divine the secret recipe from looking. "I hope Cass learns to cook this."

"Maybe she already knows," Chopper reached into the bag with his free hand and pulled out a piece of the pastry.

"How are things proceeding?" Sketch, sucking on a sticky finger, turned to Edge.

Edge shrugged. "We've got hopes."

"Jesse?" frowned Chopper.

Edge paused. "I think so. Different hopes than the rest of us. But I think he hopes she'll help … mend him somehow."

"What do you think, Edge? About Jesse?"

There was another shrug from Edge as he reached into the bag for another treat, eyeing the peach who was sticking out her pink tongue. "He's getting better. More sociable. Said he may play chase today."

"Good," smiled Chopper. He wondered if he should touch her tongue with a sticky finger and let her taste the sweetness but decided not. She reacted to his decision by puckering her lips and wrinkling her nose.

Edge looked at them with his steely blue eyes. "Cass may come to watch."

"Will she and Saria get into a fight, do you think?" Sketch reached out for the baby and smiled broadly as Chopper handed her over with more care than if he were handing over a live explosive.

"I would think," began Chopper. "That it all depends on how Jester and Saria act. Jester's apologized to her, and he's all wrapped up in Saria. I can't see any trouble with Jester." Both Edge and Sketch nodded their agreement; Sketch adding a small coo at peach and she made a happy garble back at him.

"Saria's attention is all on Jester now," added Sketch. "She's secure in that he loves her." Sketch smiled. "She _knows_ that she is loved." He turned to Edge. "I won't be playing chase, so if you bring Cass to sit with me, I'll let her know how the game is played, and keep her busy, smiling, in a good mode. Saria is unlikely to yell or pout at me."

They both acknowledged the truth of that.

"Edge, you need to let Jester and Saria know that she might be here. If Saria makes a fuss, let her know that Cass is your choice and the choice of several more brothers." Chopper finished the last treat and stared down into the bag, hoping more would magically appear. "I don't think she'll object too much if she knows Cass is here because you want her here. If she's aware that Cass may become her sister-in-law."

Edge smiled.

Echo & Aureki

Aureki had white flour on her orange fingers mimicking the markings of her face. She was singing as she cooked and Echo could only watch, bemused and enchanted by his wife. Fives had come in with a smile at Echo and, more likely, Aureki. Sula wasn't the cook in that family and neither was Saoha.

"What is that song, Aureki?" He asked softly; sometimes too much talking ruined the food. Not that he or Rex ever noticed. It was good, it was all good and not just the food. She finished cutting the first pan of _tashki_ into individual pieces. It was a golden pastry covered with sticky syrup just beginning to harden now they'd been removed from the oven.

"A cooking song," she laughed. "It doesn't translate well. 'Fire proper, flour crisp, fruit sweet, let my hands accomplish this and more." She started cutting the pastry in the second pan.

"It works," he smiled. "Every time you cook something I can only marvel at the tastes."

There'd been some noise upstairs; quiet talking, then Fives had come back down with the peach in his arms. "I'm taking her out to Chopper. He's going to watch over her for a while up in the barn."

"A moment, Fives," Aureki paused in the song and quickly put six of the pastries she was making into a sack. "This is for them."

"None for me?" Fives was being facetious. "Ah, well. I have hopes that peach will turn out to cook."

"She must grow a bit first." Aureki bent over the wriggling child, touching noise to noise. "I will teach her, if …" She let the sentence trail into nothing.

"If we don't all go separate ways?" Fives asked gently. "We will, Aureki. But we are brothers and we'll meet up again in time."

"Then I will teach her to cook." Aureki ran her fingers over her own belly, ignoring the white streaks left by the flour. "And she will have a sister cousin and brother cousin to learn with." Her fingers reached up to touch Fives on his cheek. "We are warmed by the fires of family."

"Thank you, sister." Fives, the peach securely in his arms and the sack between two fingers, moved from the kitchen and out the door.

Aureki watched him leave, then the empty space where he'd been with an odd expression on her face. "What is planned, Echo? There is something. I can see it in the faces of you and Fives; in Cody and Rex and Chopper and Djinn and most of the other men. It is like the expression many of you have when you play chase." She turned to him, almost angry. "There is a plan and you have kept it from me."

"No," Echo shook his head but he frowned. "It's not really a plan yet, just talk."

Her eyes narrowed and she crossed her arms.

"Truly, Aureki. It's just talk." He spread his hands out, palm upward, as though offering her something.

"Against the Empire." She stated and he nodded slowly. "About what you will do, what you can do, what you plan to do. You are going to leave in small groups and pairs so the capture of one does not lead to the capture of all. You a making plans so each of you is, can be, self-supporting."

"Yes." Echo murmured.

"Get out." She turned around, back to the pans of _tashki_ and picked up a knife to cut it into individual pieces. "I will let your fatherless children know that you loved them. I will give them your medals; cold comfort in the night."

"Aureki, please don't…"

"Don't what, Echo? Don't be hurt? Don't cry for you? Don't long for you every night you are not beside me in bed." She wheeled on him again, the knife in her hand was too close to his face for comfort and he took it from her. She didn't seem to notice. "You will take my sister as well. And you will leave me with three children in a home of tears…"

"I won't leave you, Aureki." He punched the sentence into her tirade. "Never."

She paused, listening, though her glistening eyes were still wary.

"Yes, we are working towards plans. Yes, IF these plans come to fruition, Rex and Ahsoka will probably take short trips. Yes, some men may be put in danger; that will be their choice. But Shili is home and _by_ _my_ _own_ choice I will never leave your side. Rex knows that. They _all_ know that and there's not a single brother who disagrees with _my_ decision."

Aureki turned back to face him, though her arms still hugged around her shoulders. "What is this plan-to-be?"

"It's two-fold. During the debriefings, Cody and Rex discovered that every man who deserted; every man who escaped the grip of Kaminoan inculcation and military loyalty had been seen as individual by someone. We won't be helping others escape. That _would_ be too dangerous. But, somehow, we want to get that experience to as many of the original clones as possible. We think that being seen as an individual allows a clone to realize he is not identical to his brothers; that his thoughts and feelings are his own. That's especially important now that any expression of individuality is suppressed. Names aren't allowed in the Imperial army even off-duty. Neither is marking armor. Showing a clone he is his own man breaks something in that chain of training. They don't all choose to desert, but it's a beginning."

"That should be a job for civilians," Aureki said softly and Echo nodded. "And the second part of this not-yet-existing plan?"

"Planting the seeds for setting up a _future_ rebellion." He saw her body tighten. "There will be little spurts of rebellion here and there; planetary attempts to secede from the Empire. They'll fail. Right now the Empire is so large and prepared that rebellion would accomplish only death." He reached out and ran his arms along hers. "There needs to be a foundation for rebellion to succeed and that will take time. In the future…."

She came into his arms and he hugged her tightly, his cheek resting against her useless montrals. "Aureki, I never had a future until Ahsoka saw me, saw every man in Torrent for who they really were. I love her for that. I will always love her for that. How could I not?" He tightened his grip, burying his face against her damp cheeks. "But now… If the laws of Shili changed, Aureki, and there could only be one husband and one wife, I would choose you."


	16. A Game of Chase

 

They escorted Cass to Cut and Suu's farm, Jesse holding her hand while Baffle and Riposte ran on ahead. Jesse didn't say much, but it wasn't like Edge's silence. Jesse was shyer, diffident.

"I've already decided to leave," he said quietly, so you don't have to…"

She slid her arm around his waist. As his arm was pulled behind him, he reflexively let go of her hand and straightened his arm to find it around her.

"I like this," he smiled after a while, saying nothing more.

When they came to the farmhouse, he began pointing out men so very much like him and telling her their names. "That's Fives," he gestured to a man with long hair talking to a blonde man holding onto a boy's hand. "Rex is also easy to distinguish and Barin is his son." He pointed to another man. "Djinn. Dare is with him." He noted Cass' uncomprehending look. "Dare is the skinny one. He had a broken jaw and couldn't eat until today. We all have instructions to make sure he's being fed."

"Jesse," she asked in a soft voice, "How do I tell you all apart?"

He was quiet, his face twisting in thought. "I don't know. We just know each other. I've been told it's recognition of facial expressions and micro-patterns; that because we were all raised together we've learned to distinguish each other simply based on the way we stand or how we move or a basic facial expression. Some men will be easy. Like me." He gestured to the tattoo that covered half his face then paused as Riposte came up to walk with them to the barn. "Chopper's easy, he has scars. Jester, of course. The commander has a scar on the outside of his left eye. Fives has the tattoo."

"And the hair," cut in Riposte, understanding their conversation. "Sinker has light brown hair and a beard. He doesn't talk much because of aphasia. Most of the others, you'll just learned."

Jesse nodded in agreement. "Ask Sketch. He's been talking to Saria and Suu a lot. Maybe he can offer you some clues. Suu and Numa said there are differences in everyone's voice also."

"I spoke with Edge," cut in Riposte. "He says we're all on the same team. You will be playing today, won't you, Jesse?" Riposte's eyes looked sad, even to Cass, and she realized he expected Jesse to say 'no'.

She turned to him and squeezed her arm tight around his waist. "You will," she added. "Please. I'd love to see you play."

He gave a half-smile at her request. "I guess so." He blushed as she stood on her toes and kissed him on the cheek.  She had kissed him before, but this was in public, in front of so many brothers.  Riposte gave both of them a big smile.

"You can sit near Sketch," Reposte said then turned slightly and gestured to another man, indistinguishable to Cass' eyes. "He said he'd be happy of the company and he'll explain the rules.  He has the same _seneth_ tattoo above his eyebrow that Edge has."

"Be careful of his leg, Cass," added Jesse. "He walks with crutches and his leg gives him a lot of pain." He released her hand as Riposte pulled on his arm towards the barn. Cass could make out the crutches on the other side of the seated man. She breathed in relief and muttered. "I'll need to keep notes."

"Then Sketch is the one you'll want to talk with." Riposte had caught her mutter. Cass blushed but Riposte and Jesse just smiled at her. "He keeps flimsi and paper in his pack along with… you'll just have to see, Cass.  Come on, Jesse, Edge saved us each one of Aureki's treats." He turned to Cass, "Edge wants to know if you can make _tashki_."

"I know what it is," replied Cass. "I suppose I can find a recipe and give it a try."

Riposte grinned. "That would be great. I'll happily volunteer to taste all your experiments." Jesse smacked him on the arm. Riposte amended his sentence. "We'd all be happy to taste."

Cass laughed; Riposte was so anxiously happy and she gave him a kiss on the cheek. He and Jesse disappeared into the barn and Cass turned toward the man sitting on the hill.  She paused, wondering how much pride she would have to swallow to be around the Lawquane women.  She'd do it, for her men but it wouldn't be comfortable.

The man on the hill, Jester, saw her regard and waved her over. He had a friendly, welcoming smile on his face and it was easy to smile back. She hoped it would be easy to keep the smile.

* * *

Suu had walked up to stand at Sketch's side but she looked at Cass. "Will you come with me, Cass? Just for a moment?"

Cass rose, glanced worriedly at Sketch who nodded reassuringly. Suu led her a slight distance away, under a shady tree by the barn. Suu glanced up then turned to Cass. "Someone is usually in one of these trees. They don't mean to eavesdrop but it does happen."

"I'm sorry, Suu." Cass apologized. "For not being more neighborly. For flirting with your husband."

"No, Cass. I'm sorry." Suu looked down at her hands and shook her head. "I've always been protective of Cut. Without … "she frowned, looking for the words, "without trying to prevent him from doing things. There's a bounty on him, you know. He's wanted. They're all wanted."

Cass reached a finger to the cut on her face and remembered why she had it. Then she remembered Kix taking her hands and putting them back into her lap. She stalled the movement. "I know." She looked at Suu. "I really thought Cut and Jester were twins. We seemed so far away from the war and it never occurred to me they might more anything more. Even when I saw Rex and the others, it was from a distance and I only saw family resemblance."

Suu nodded. "It's why I was rude to you. To minimize meeting strangers so there was less danger for Cut; for Jester when he decided to stay and for the others when they visited.  I never objected to you flirting with Cut." She smiled. "He enjoys it as much as they all do. I just did not want you to find out he was a clone and the easiest way was to make sure you weren't welcome."

"I thought it was the flirting." Then Cass nodded. "I'll have to be doing that also now. Won't I? Not letting other people know."

"Yes," Suu took her hand. "I will help you in that as much as I can, my sister. And it is I who apologizes."

"I understand why, now."

There was friendly silence as they walked back to Sketch, watching the game. One man took another to the grass. To Cass they looked almost identical.

"Nicely done," yelled Suu and the trooper turned and gave her a pleased grin.

"Yes, sir," he bellowed to her as he turned back to the game, deftly avoiding a tackle from another man who's only identifying characteristic was his shaved head. Suu chuckled as Cass sat back next to Sketch.

"Shy will be staying on Saleucami. He's..." Suu bowed her head. "He's not really healed."

Cass frowned. "He looks …" she paused. "You mean in the head, don't you."

"He's scared and retreats into trooper mode, into being more of a soldier than usual, at anything he hasn't confronted before. He needs to stay with his brothers, in situations that don't change much."

Cass snorted then hid her mouth with her hand, slightly embarrassed at the unladylike behavior. "That describes farming on Saleucami, all right." Sketch smiled at the snort.

"Never knew women did that." He turned back to the game and Shy. "Cody says his mind has shattered; that he had probably been reconditioned, maybe more than once. We have no idea how or why he deserted.  Or even if he really did. They liked torturing him almost as much as me." Sketch's voice was soft with compassion then he smiled up into Suu's face. "It's good he'll have a home with you, Suu." Then he turned his open expression toward Cass. "What about you, Cass? Will you be wife to all of them or will you choose only one?" Sketch asked softly as he held his hands up, one to each woman. Cass took his hand and sat back down next to him. Suu clasped his hand for a moment then let it go. She'd be returning to Cut at Jester's house. At Edge's request, she'd only come to talk with Cass.

Cass' eyes widened. "I can keep them all?" Suu muffled her laughter and Sketch didn't bother. That got them a glance from another man, scarred and holding a baby, sitting next to a Zeltron woman whose skin was a rich red color. He smiled at them then turned his attention back to the baby and the woman. He'd been one of the first men tackled out and Sketch said he'd only wanted to sit next to Sula and hold the baby.

Suu squatted next to Cass, speaking. "Most of them are brothers in ways we cannot imagine. I have more admonishments that Cut needs to have brothers with him than I have received offers to 'share'. In some ways they are afraid they will never be seen as anything more than copies. It took a long time before Cut truly believed that he was an entire human; with original emotions and thoughts, even a soul that belonged to him and wasn't just some tiny portion split among a million others." Suu shook her head.

Sketch nodded even though his eyes were on the game. "Cody tried to teach us that in prison." He reached out absently to rub his thigh. "I don't think we've all learned that yet."

"It was hard on Cut, on both of us; that could have been eased if he'd had someone to talk with who'd had the same experiences as him." Suu looked around at the men surrounding them; most playing the game, others like Sketch, merely observing or already tagged out. "I don't think that will be a problem with any of these men. They'll be staying here or leaving in groups. Only Cody has suggested traveling on alone and both Cut and Rex are trying to talk him out of it." She gestured to a laughing man in the game and Cass observed him. He had a slight scar around his left eye and his dark hair slightly more graying than most of the other men.

"He's the commander, isn't he?" Cass asked, turning to Sketch. He nodded and Cass continued quietly, almost in a whisper. "I think Jesse is already planning on going with him. He said something about a commander always needing a second."

"I'm glad to hear that," Sketch said. "It would be good for both of them. Jesse as much as Cody."

* * *

Saria sat on the other side of Sketch. She didn't say anything, but neither did Cass. Sketch put his left arm around Saria's shoulders, took Cass' hand in his right hand.

"You're both nervous, you know," he commented watching Boil make a grab at Edge. Edge twisted, leaving Boil behind. "Cheer for Edge, Cass. That was an excellent move he just did."

Cass yelled and slapped her hands above her head. "Yea, Edge! Edge!" The grin on his face became wider, though he didn't turn to look at her. Two more men, the long-haired Fives and the previously pointed-out Cody, were on his heels.

"I believe he's showing off for you, Cass. Keep your eye on him, I bet he's leading them into an ambush." Sketch's words proved true as Edge pivoted on his foot, taking Fives to the ground, even as Riposte grabbed Cody, wrestling him down. This time Cass didn't need to have it pointed out to her. Cass jumped to her feet, clapping. "Woohoo, Edge! Yea, Riposte." Both men grinned. Cody and Fives shook their heads as they went to commiserate with the other players, already tackled out, sitting by the boundary line.

Cass sat down again. "I'm sorry, Saria. Chymdura told me that you said you were through with Jester and when he came by that day, and," she shrugged. "I thought it was true."

Saria blushed. "I did tell Chymdura that. I was angry and upset. I would come home and Jester would decide to go on a run even before I sat down." Her jaw firmed. "I meant it, too. That weekend I moved out. Then I found out that you were pregnant."

Cass opened her lips with a small frown, but Sketch squeezed her hand warningly and she merely licked her lips.

"I was too angry at Jester to ask but I assumed that he'd been running to you on all those runs he'd been taking when I'd come home."

Cass shook her head, but again Sketch squeezed her fingers lightly.

Then," Saria spread her arms out to encompassing the field and all the men as she breathlessly rushed through her words. "Then Jester told me that I'd be needed here. Then I found out that Jester thought I was having an affair with Chymdura. Then I found out I was pregnant and I found out I still loved Jester. Then," Saria paused and glanced at Sketch with a smile. "Then I proposed to Sketch and it was the very best thing I ever did."

"Was than an apology, Saria?" asked Sketch.

Saria sighed. "No. Just a convoluted explanation. I am sorry, Cass. I will make a public apology anytime you want. I got angry on mere assumptions. At least you were acting on information that you'd been given. It was wrong by the time you got it, but that was my fault."

Cass nodded. "That's a lot to go through."

"Jester and I will be opening our marriage to Sketch later. Maybe to others. I don't know yet; he and I need to discuss it. We messed up because neither of us would talk to the other. Will you want to visit Jester? I told him that I didn't think I could tolerate that," she paused. "But I think I can now." She gave a twisted grin. "You're not the bad guy I thought you were."

"I don't think so, Saria. Jester is kind and wonderful but I think my guys will be keeping me busy." She smiled widely, suddenly reminiscent of Edge's expression during the game. "I've been told I can keep them all."

Saria and Sketch laughed, Cass joined them after a moment's thought.

 


	17. Grain

A Trooper and his Commander

Cody looked out over one of the fields the men had been working on. Tiny blades of wheat were peeping up from the dark soil. Djinn had told him there was a physical pleasure to the soil, in working it with your fingers. Baffle said the hard work made for sore muscles but you could see what was growing.

Shy had simply stood and smiled. He was in worn trousers so faded Cody didn't know if the original color had been black or blue or something more festive. A long strip of red and yellow patterned cloth belted the trousers tight around his waist. His chest was bare and getting darker, tanning as they all did even in the faded light of Saleucami's sun. His feet were bare, most of the men removed their hard boots to work in the fields. Shy kept his hair militarily short, no styling to it at all, simply short.

"It's a beautiful color, sir. Living green." Then he had knelt and brushed his hand over the tiny green shoots. "They tickle and I can…" His voice had softened. "I can sort of forget."

"I'm glad, Shy," Cody said softly. He'd unintentionally terrorized the man when Shy had first come to prison. "Will you be ok here on Saleucami?"

"Sir, yes, sir." Shy came to attention and Cody bit the inside of his cheek. After several years in prison and a couple of months on Saleucami, Shy still came to sharp and perfect attention like a new trooper fresh off Kamino; not the time-worn attention a man gave in battle and not the insulting, forced attention everyone else had developed in prison.

 _How many times have you been reconditioned?_ Cody asked himself again. He'd asked Shy once and would never again ask that question of any man. Shy had curled up in a fetal position and whimpered, crying for several hours. Kix had finally coaxed him with strokes and pats, almost like an animal, before Shy had stopped trembling. Cody hadn't been able to get near the man for several weeks.

For once, Shy offered a little more. "This isn't where I use to be. Not, not, not the place with the water."

 _Kamino_ , thought Cody _. Three 'nots's? Perhaps he'd been returned there three times, three reconditions. Ah, kriff, Shy._ Shy always tried to be helpful. He tried to tell, tried to explain.  They all knew that, but no one could really understand when he tried.

"And not the hard-fist place or the loud noise places. Crystal. Noses. Plate. City." Shy moved his hands, anxious that Commander Cody understand.

 _Prison, battlefields_. Cody sucked in his lips and nodded. It was hard talking to Shy because the more you spoke with him, the more you realized what he had lost. The other men had progressed, the other men had fought to gain and retain human dignity. Shy's battle had been lost long before he ended up in prison. Cody wondered if he'd been like this as a trooper and wondered how a squad would treat him. _Crystal could be Christophsis. Noses:_ His mind wondered for a short time. _Geonosis, maybe? Plate? Not a clue. City could only be Coruscant._

Tentatively, he asked. "You were always outnumbered? Weren't you?"

"Brothers. No brothers. Brothers here." Shy shrugged but he licked his lips and clenched his fists as he did when stressed.  Kix had told Cody that.  He'd told Cody a lot of things that only a medic could get away with.  He'd told Cody that he'd beat him senseless if he ever did anything like that again. 

Shy's shoulders were stiff and he'd start to stutter if Cody pushed him any further. Then he'd run or cry or get that expression in his face like he was bleeding inside, like he was dying slowly and knew it. Cody backed down; he didn't need to know what Shy himself couldn't explain. Gently he set his palm on Shy's shoulder as Kix had told him; an unconscious signal that Kix had integrated into Shy. Shy relaxed.

"You're right, Shy. You have brothers here. They're good brothers to you. You're a good brother to them."

"This is a good place, sir, for my brothers. All of it. I can protect them." Shy's face twisted in some inner anguish. "If you… If you trust me to do so." He looked down at the dark soil. "I like here," he whispered, his breathing fast and shallow, as if voicing his choice was forbidden.

Cody nodded, not yet able to speak for the pain of the man. He looked out over the field sprouting green. "Of course, Shy. I can't think of a better man to assign than you. To protect them, to help them, to be family."

Shy puffed up in pride. "I'll report to the captain daily." His face fell and became uncertain at Cody's frown.

"Which captain, Shy?" Cody asked, trying to soften his frown. Surely he couldn't mean Rex? Rex would be going back to Shili.

"Captain Suu, sir." He relaxed again at Cody's smile and Cody's hand on his shoulder.

"Of course, trooper. I forgot you were assigned to her."

"I'm glad they finally put some women in the army. I'm not scared anymore. You can't be scared, not really, when you've got someone who loves you."

Cody smiled and bent to brush his hands over the new growth of delicate, green plants.

 

A Father and his Son II

"I don't understand it, Cut." Suu's voice was angry and she stalked the living room of Jester's house as he rested on the sofa. "He's out in the fields all the time. He doesn't even come to the yard to eat; Djinn or Riposte usually take him something. You're his father, Cut. The only father he's ever known. Why doesn't he come to see you?" There were tears in her eyes. "When I see that boy…"

"Don't." Cut's voice was soft. "Don't do or say anything, Suu. Don't go looking for him. Just let him be and don't be upset on my behalf. It's enough that I understand and, when I am better, I will go to him."

"What is it, then, Cut?" She turned her body stiff and angry toward him.

Her husband only smiled at her. "That's between him and me." He held his hand and, when she took it, pulled her down to cuddle next to him.

It took three more days before Cut could make it to his own house and his own bed. It was another three before he went to look for Jek. He felt weak and walked with a cane. He had a feeling he'd never again feel as strong as he'd felt before, as if the virus had killed something in him.

Suu hadn't told him which field. She had, in fact, thought Jek would be out in the various fields equally, but Cut knew which field.

_It was Cut's first field. Suu had several other fields, but this was the first new one in several years, the first in their plans of expanding. She had given it to him and he had planned it during the winter. Now Cut was looking forward to the new work. He was starting to consider himself a farmer but he couldn't do that without understanding farming. He had claimed that field to make himself a farmer._

_He'd begun by researching during the mild, cool winter of Saleucami. He decided he would hand-plow it. Suu told him he could use the tractor, but she had also told him how it was done before tractors and he decided to try that. Cut had made a plow, simply to prove he could. Jek had sat nearby while he forged it; the six-year-old occasionally running for more wood for the fire or water for Cut. The first line of the field, Cut had shovel-dug. Suu had said that had been done before plows were invented and, at the end of the day, Cut was glad to metaphorically raise a glass to the unknown inventor of plows._

_For the remainder of the field, he harnessed up one of the older eopies. Suu had said the old eopie didn't have the strength to do a good job and Cut had laughed. "I'll provide the strength, Suu; she's just to make sure at least one of us has done this before." Jek had watched for a while then Cut had asked for the boy's help and set him up on the crossbar, providing more weight to push the plow into the soil. The soil had been fine and moist and black. It hadn't needed much of Cut's strong arms and he began to understand farming wasn't necessarily an endeavor of strength._

_By hand, Cut had gone through the plowed field and removed any rock the size of his first or larger. There had been several large boulders which Cut had relocated by harnessing the tame, old eopie, giving the reins to Jek and pushing the stone on a sledge while Jek guided the animal. Together, he and Jek had made a game of it, throwing the rest of the rocks at a target. Then Cut had used the tractor to disk the field, rake it and tilled it further. He'd used the eopie manure as well as the rich soil from where the old nuna coop had stood. He had taken algae and overgrowing pondweeds and tilled them into the soil. Each night he had updated Suu on his progress and what he planned for the next day._

_Jek had thrown the first handful of grain onto the waiting soil. When the wheat was a luxuriant mat of soft green blades, Cut had held Jek on his shoulders, letting the boy have a man's view. His response had been gratifying._

" _Wow!"_

_Cut had chuckled at that. "It's our first field; yours and mine. How do you think it looks?"_

" _It looks great, dad." It had been the first time Jek had called him that and Cut's knees trembled._

" _I'm proud of it, Jek. It's the best thing I've ever done and we've done it together. I think, when I die a long time from now, I'd like to be buried here."_

_Jek had hugged him tightly around the neck._

Cut found Jek where he thought he might, sitting on one of the bigger boulders that had come out of the ground almost a decade ago, looking over the bright green carpet of seedlings.

"Willing to share the rock?" he asked. He didn't want to admit he needed it, but his legs were weak and his body shook after the walk. Without looking up, Jek moved and Cut took his place, thankful he'd placed the stone in the shade of a tree so long ago. Jek handed up some water and a bit of bread stuffed with nerf steak from last night's leftovers.

The field was a carpet of green, like so long ago. Cut could tell it had been thoroughly and carefully worked. "It looks good, son. I don't think I've ever seen a field tended so well."

"Thanks. Dad." Jek tried to keep a hard face. He'd been practicing but Cut saw the tiny quiver of his lower lip. "I made sure this field was the first planted and that the water was even. Made sure it was perfect; stayed out the first couple of nights to keep the insects and wild nuna from getting the seed. Give it a chance to sprout. I did this field." Jek dipped his head and looked down at his sandwich. "The other fields, they look pretty good too, but your brothers helped. This one, _I_ did." Cut saw a tiny tear slide from the corner of Jek's eye.

Suddenly, Jek's face squeezed in pain, his lekku twisting in agitation. "I was so afraid, dad. So afraid that you'd die and be gone forever. That I'd never understand. I was scared that if I looked at you it would be the last time and I'd never see you again. I was scared that if I started crying, I'd never stop. I was scared that I disappointed you."

"You've never disappointed me, Jek." Cut put his hand on Jek's shoulder. "Never! I am so proud of you. Death is hard to face, Jekl. No one has ever faced death without being scared."

Jek crumpled then; hitting the ground with his knees as tears rolled down his face. He slowly turned into Cut's arm, his body shaking as he held Cut around the waist, his face buried into Cut's chest.

Cut's arms came around his son and his face nestled between the boy's lekku. "I love you too, son. When I was in Issuya, I was afraid my heart would break at not being able to see my family again." He rubbed Jek's back then spoke softly. "A long time ago, I thought this field was the best thing I'd ever done. At the time, it was and I'm still proud of the work we did on it together. But times change, Jek. Looking back on my entire life from right now, you're the best thing I've ever done."

 

Rex

Rex stayed busy during the days. Mostly he played with Barin. Sometimes with Barin and Echo and Aureki, sometimes with Barin and his brother clones, but he always played with Barin. He'd run and climb trees with his laughing son. He'd answer questions for his son or at least try. "Da, do bugs have teeth?" "Da, do worms get married?" "Da, do clouds go to sleep at night?" He helped Barin say remembrance each night at dusk; reciting his own remembrance and the men who'd died under his command.

He sparred with his brothers and taught the younglings fighting skills. He asked Kaver, who'd been a sniper, to evaluate and train Jek in shooting when the boy had proven an apt pupil on blaster. He and Echo discovered Shaeeah was quick and accurate; with Dare's assistant they taught her both knife-throwing and knife-fighting. Dare went a step further and showed her how to manufacture a variety of bladed weapons – starting with chipped stone.

Numa – Rex threw his hands up in defeat at teaching Numa. Waxer and Boil had done an excellent job. She was as good as most of the troopers in anything except where their muscle mass triumphed. Boil had only smiled, "Give her time, Rex, she will outfight you in time." Rex didn't doubt it. He tried to teach her to handle two blasters but she was hopelessly right-handed. She said she would practice until she became adequate. Rex expected her adequate would be like Boil's or Waxer's adequate – as near perfect to make no different. Even Cody had to admit defeat when he finally played scouts seek with her and came back to camp with his name written on his back.

Rex soaked in the thermal pool with Echo and Aureki. Edge or Chopper or Djinn sometimes took the boy to give his parents some rest. Rex spent hours with Aureki, sometimes holding her in his arms while she took a nap, his hands pressed against her belly, feeling his child move. Once he'd put his head to her belly and heard a tiny, quick heartbeat. He helped her prepare meals along with Suu and the perennial assistants, Backup and Checkout.

He continued listening to the histories of the men. Riven finally, haltingly, sketched out to Rex what he wouldn't tell Sula; what kept him from getting cleared. It was a story so very similar to Jesse's. "Tell Sula," he advised Riven. "It's not something you can hold inside and the longer you try the more it will hurt you. It's the horrors we do to other people that haunt us."

Rex and Cody sketched out ideas and briefed the men as talk coalesced into plans. It was nothing grandiose. Mostly, he and Cody wanted the men to have lives. But, if they could … somehow … convince civilians to see the Imperial Army clones as individuals. Numa had smiled and glanced at her _nerra_. Waxer had sighed softly and Boil had merely nodded his head. There were other plans to build a firm foundation for rebellion; Cody with his command training and Advance Recon Commando Echo were in charge of that training.

At night, Rex waited.

At dusk, Rex would hand Barin off to Echo, sometimes both men putting him to bed or holding him while Aureki told a bedtime story. Rex would give his brother a tight hug. "There's no better brother I could have had, Echo." He'd kiss Aureki good-night and tell her he loved her before leaving her to Echo's bed.

Rex would then climb up the small hill where the flyer could land, where he and Echo had waited before for their wives, where they'd brought his brothers to freedom on that first night. He'd watch the stars or drowse lightly. Sometimes he'd have tears in his eyes, never quite sure why. Other times he would feel exhilarated.

Occasionally Echo or Cody or one of the men would come and sit with him for a while. There was always someone out, usually one of his brothers keeping watch for drifters. They were fewer drifters now and they were usually loners, ones who had survived the virus. While the men carried a blaster, they usually didn't have to use them. They often sat with Rex, but only for a short while, as a break from keeping watch.

Rex knew Ahsoka would return to Saleucami as soon as she could. He waited in faith and hope and love.

The grain was knee-high to Rex before the quarantine ended, before the port opened up, before Ahsoka came home to his arms

 


	18. JAAC

 

Ahsoka sighed deeply as she gazed on the misty planet motionless in the absolute blackness of space. To one side were several imperial destroyers as well as a few other trade ships. "Saleucami is still quarantined and we're attracting attention by orbiting for so long." Ahsoka softly rubbed her belly. Echo's daughter 'rubbed' back and she smiled for an instant then her mien became serious again. "Imperial attention and that could get deadly."

"Then we'll have to go somewhere else and wait. Shili or Zeltros or even back to Dantooine." Saoha leaned back in the co-pilot's seat. "No matter how attractive their captain."

It was a joke. The captain on the destroyer who warned them away from landing on Saleucami each day and answered their questions was a clone. Ahsoka nodded slowly, thoughts of her family in her mind. She took a breath and opened her mouth.

"I don't either," admitted Saoha. Ahsoka's lips quirked into a wry smile.

"Do you always…" Sometimes Saoha and her Zeltron empathy could be very exasperating, particularly after being isolated in the ship for several weeks. It also made them more attuned to each other. _Very handy to have in an emergency._ It was a whisper from the Force.

"Usually," smirked Saoha. "But I'll try to behave myself." Suddenly she was serious. "We can go where you wish. I have no real opinions except Saleucami as soon as the quarantine is lifted. I miss the men. Zeltros might be a bit close to the Core for comfort, but I have extended family there who would welcome us."

Ahsoka nodded. "Saleucami as soon as it's open. But Dantooine doesn't feel right, neither does Shili. Neither does Zeltros." She glanced at Saoha. "Which men?"

"Is that the Force speaking?" Saoha tilted her head and grinned. She couldn't feel beyond Ahsoka, but she could feel Ahsoka touch the Force. "All of them."

"I think so," murmured Ahsoka. "Except my husbands, Saoha. You'd better not miss my husbands."

"Go meditate on it, then. When the universe gives you a message, it's probably a bad idea to ignore it. I'll pull us away from Saleucami and closer to the Corellian Run. That goes just about everywhere. The Imperial ship will see that we are following their orders and Captain Cutie will breathe in relief at our departure." Saoha flicked several switches on the console.

Ahsoka laughed softly. Long familiarity with the clones had taught her their facial expressions. Captain Cutie, as Saoha called him, was always glad to see the beautiful Zeltron, loved hearing her voice and amazed that she flirted with him over the ship-to-ship holo. He'd bend the regulations as far as he could for her. But he wouldn't break them and if they tried to break quarantine by landing, he would order them destroyed. "Captain Cutie will be desolated at your departure."

"Then we must call him and let him know that we will return." Saoha smiled as she considered what to say then she turned to Ahsoka. "I miss them all, my sister," she said softly. "As lovers, as brothers, as friends, as men requiring attention, as strength to our arms, as warmth to our bodies, as ease to our souls. When we return, I will be speaking with Fives and Sula about adding to our family." She giggled and waved her arms in mock-surrender at Ahsoka's glare. "Though not Rex or Echo."

"Good," smirked Ahsoka. Saoha was like a sister; bubbly and so very different from her own calm sister, Aureki. Soon, once again she would need to meditate on the Jedi stricture against attachment. It no longer applied to her, but it was an intellectual effort to understand it; to understand its ramifications. To understand why attachment had made it easier for the Force to reach her and yet had caused her former master to turn… She shook her head to clear the trail of those thoughts.

Ahsoka moved into the cabin she'd taken as hers. It didn't take her anything more than sitting, relaxing and taking four deep breaths. She didn't know the name of the planet, just that it was hot and dry and how to get there; and that somewhere on that planet a clone's soul was crying, bleeding into the Force, dying by increments.

* * *

Jaac sat on the corner, Bird in his arms, calculating the amount of water his family would need for the night and how much he would be able to afford with the small coins in the cup. How much the homemade condenser might pull from the dry air. At the discrepancy, he started calculating how much less he could get by with for another night. He tried to form saliva around the smooth pebble he had slipped under his tongue but there wasn't enough liquid in his body. He hadn't had the liquid to urinate for almost a day. He sighed deeply. He couldn't go another night on so little. He estimated he was at four to six per cent water loss and was already experiencing symptoms of dizziness and the tingling of paresthesia in his arms. By tomorrow morning he'd be at ten percent or higher. Convulsions began at ten percent.  He couldn't do that to his children.

A Thvenyan, one of the saurian natives of the planet, dropped a coin into his begging bowl. He bowed his scarred head in thanks and reached his hands up to take the malediction; she was one of his usuals. She turned away, pulling the scarf over her face so the bad luck would forsake her. She came often and Jaac knew her luck was almost as bad as his. "Z'dsh pah yar," he murmured.

Scars were anathema on Thvenya and burn scars the lowest; humans were the most pitiable because human skin showed the burn most vividly. Jaac had been told that his burn scars were given by the god Z'dsh and indicative that he was permitted to take on their bad luck.

He began recalculating taking the small coin into consideration.

Kierzon ran up to him, breathless, a bag slung around his shoulders. Jaac closed his eye in disbelief. Stealing was a criminal act, harshly punished, as Kierzon knew. He'd been caught before. Jaac had tried to convince him not to steal, but times were bad. Times were always bad. They'd get worse if Kierzon was caught stealing. He wasn't considered a child anymore.

"Give it to me, Kier." Jaac reached out a big hand for the bag and set Bird on his lap. Maybe if it was in his possession, they couldn't punish Kierzon, they'd punish him instead. Kier handed it over, a tentative smile formed on his face.

"There's water, Jaac. She was a spacer, just off the port, and water-fat. I heard them say they would be leaving in the morning." Kier dug into the bag and pulled out a bottle, then another, still hesitantly smiling. "There's almost enough for you tonight and they won't notice the lack if they're leaving tomorrow." His eyes pleaded with Jaac. "No one injured." That was Jaac's major rule: no one injured.

"Except you if you're caught," growled Jaac through a dust-coated throat as reached out his hand and clasped Kierzon on the back of his neck bringing them face to face. "Don't do this anymore, my son. Please." His voice was a whisper.

"You need this," Kier paused. "Papa."

Jaac closed his eyes. Kierzon called him 'papa' so rarely. Kier remembered his real parents, his real name, what life had been like before; unlike Bird, unlike Nac and Nub who'd been so young when Jaac had found them deserted and exposed in the park. They hadn't remembered their names.

And there was nothing Jaac could do except to continue begging. As far the bureaucracy was concerned, he didn't exist. The jobs he would have gladly taken didn't go to humans and didn't go to men with scars. He rubbed the back of Kier's head.

"My poor little family," he whispered. Jaac had no grandiose plans, no plans at all except protecting his family and trying to getting through the day. He dug into the bag and pulled out some flimsis with notes and a smaller bag containing odds and ends as well as some credits. "Is there any way you can return this without her realizing you stole it?"

Kierzon flushed as he shook his head. "I snatched it off her shoulder."

Jaac grimaced. "Outside security camera limits?" Kierzon nodded. "Then we'll need to get rid of anything identifiable." Jaac frowned; in another man it would draw his eyebrows down, but Jaac had lost those in the funeral pyre.

His fingers had found something familiar as they combed through the small bag. He pulled out a medal; he saw the red and gold ribbon, the rounded diamond shape of a medal of bravery. The muscles in his face began twitching in some combination of pain and anger and grief. Kier looked away as he popped the seal on the water bottle and pushed it into Jaac's free hand. Jaac clenched it and sucked down the water in two deep gulps.

Kier didn't ask, not anymore, about when his father had worn white armor; Jaac's face would twist in pain and his eyes would tear up. He'd have nightmares that scared the younger children. They scared Kierzon also because after Jaac would calm the younger children with an excuse and a song, he'd go back to his sleeping spot, face the wall and weep silently, his arms covering his head and his body shaking.

"May we have the bag back?" It was a woman's voice and by Kier's frozen reaction, Jaac knew it was the woman he'd stolen it from.

Jaac looked at her with his single eye. She was Zeltron, a sunset pink, with darker hair and beautiful. Zeltrons were empaths, he remembered from his training. She didn't seem particularly angry that her bag had been stolen; she had a slightly bemused smile on her lips. Perhaps she was listening to his need, to the needs of his family.

He brushed that thought aside. He'd never met anyone, save his Kamino brothers, who had ever cared about his needs. They were dead now. Even those who tossed coins into his bowl did so to pay Z'dsh, not to help Jaac and his family.

Jaac glanced around for someone with her. A woman this beautiful, this lovely and seductive had to have a man with her. Most likely she was with someone big, mean, jealous and tough. There was no one else nearby, unless Jaac included an even smaller Togrutan woman with the round belly of pregnancy. She stared at him oddly; less at his scars than at him. He wondered if she recognized him for what he was. Most people saw only the scars.

He kept back the medal but carefully returned everything else into the little bag and then put that into the larger bag and included the second bottle of water.

She shook her head and reached into the bag. "No, that was for you. I could tell how thirsty you are." She pulled the bottle out and handed it to Kier then turned back to Jaac. "But my husband's first medal is very precious to me and I will want that returned."

"You're lying. This is a GAR medal. Pre-Empire. And the only men in _that_ army were clones." He snarled the last word. Her husband had never been in that army. Who would want to marry just a copy? "The Jedi killed us then and now the Empire kills the few remaining clone stormtroopers." That last word, also, was snarled with hate. He twisted the red and gold ribbon between his fingers, rubbed the bronzium between his fingers. "Unless your husband was CIS and took the medal off a corpse."

She looked at her companion then back to Jaac. "This conversation is getting too interesting to continue here on a street corner." She raised her eyebrows in question. "Shall we go elsewhere?"

Jaac wanted to ignore her but he glanced down at the medal in his hand. Once he'd had one similar and he vaguely wondered what had happened to it.

They waited for his answer and it was that politeness which made his answer a nod of affirmative.

"Lunch for me and my children." Maybe it was too much. He backed down a little. "I know a place where it will be cheap."

"The Togrutan woman chuckled. "Is that a place where we'll _want_ to eat?"

Jaac frowned and gave her the truth. "No. but it is cheap and they let me eat there."

"How many children?" asked the Zeltron woman.

"Four." Jaac answered weakly. It was too many, he knew. "But I'll forgo lunch and Bird here," he gestured at the little girl. "She doesn't eat very much."

The Zeltron woman shook her head. "All of you, certainly. And a decent enough restaurant."

He looked down at the yellow stone. "I'm not allowed in decent restaurants." He gestured at his face; the burn scars, the missing eye and ear then to the little bowl of coins. "I'm bad luck and they pay me to take theirs away."

"You seem to have had some bad luck." That was the Togrutan again. She glanced at Kierzon and Bird with a smile. "Good luck, too, that I can see. The same as anyone." She glanced at the Zeltron woman with an eyebrow upraised in question, then turned back to Jaac. "There's a park nearby, isn't there? We can go there. Saoha and your oldest son can go for food and bring it to the park. Acceptable?"

Jaac nodded and turned to Kierzon. "Take her to Belko's. While she's waiting for the food, you get Nub and Nac. They can help carry."

He glanced at the Togrutan woman. For all that the other had been more interested and said more, the Togrutan's body language and manner said she was in charge.

The Zeltron nodded. "We'll make sure to get plenty of water."

In the park, Jaac had to sit with his back to the path so no one would come upon his scarred visage unexpectedly even though he'd drawn the dark scarf to hide most of the burn on his face and shoulder. He could feel his skin crawl at being in the unprotected place but otherwise the authorities would toss him out of the park and fine him.  He couldn't afford a fine.

Still, the women, their names were Saoha and Soka, had bought a good amount of food and water. There was more than enough for hunger and thirst, even some sweet sticks for the children. There was more than enough water for two more days.

"She insisted," Kier had murmured to him. "I didn't ask."

"She an empath, Kier. She can feel how much we need it." Jaac hoped she didn't have a motive beyond her own discomfort in his presence.

They ate together while the sunset pink Zeltron excitedly told them tales of the space ways. Even Kierzon listened with wide eyes and Jaac was pleased at that, please that Kierzon could be a child again, if only for a short time. It was almost enjoyable, almost like what he thought a family should be like.

"Your turn," the Togruta smiled as they packed up the remains of lunch. Most of the food seemed to end up at Jaac's side along with the water. "Saoha has been talking all through the meal and I'm interested in hearing your story."

"It's not much of a story." Jaac looked down at the flat stone they were sitting on. It was yellow sandstone, the bedrock of the entire planet.

Soka shrugged. "Begin in the army."

Jaac glanced over to his children. Kier was playing with Bird while Nub and Nac were chasing each other. They were laughing. He closed his eye and leaned his head back

"When did you realize I was a clone?"

"The instant we saw you," replied the sunset pink woman.

Jaac chewed his lips, frowning. "If you give my children six thousand credits, I'll go quietly with you."

The Zeltron looked at him quizzically. "Where would we…" she began but was cut off by the tired voice of Soka.

"Bounty for a clone, Saoha," the Togrutan said softly. "Is ten thousand credits.  I doubt if your husband ever mentioned that."

"I won't fight you," Jaac continued, his belief that there was a Mr. Mean-and-Tough confirmed. "It will be an easy capture with no chance of injury or death and…"

Saoha cut him off with a hiss. "No! That is not…." She calmed as Soka rubbed her shoulder gently then continued speaking to Jaac. "For the moment, Jaac. We're simply interested in your story. How you came to be here." Saoha reached out her hand to his, but he moved it away from her touch. She sighed.

He didn't believe them. They probably had locating transmitters and Mr. Mean-and-Tough was closing in on them. That was probably the reason for the park. By law he had to have his back to the path. He shivered.

"We came off Kamino all cocky, ready to beat back the CIS, ready to die for the Republic, for its peoples, its principles." Jaac looked down at his hands. "The Jedi generals hated us. Mostly we were assigned to Rancisis. A little with Vos. I never figured out why they hated us. None of us did. We were their tools, their weapons, the means for victories but they treated us…" Jaac raised his hands palm up. "None of us understood. Even now, I don't understand why he hated us."

"Not all the Jedi were that way. I understand that General Kenobi and his Commander worked very well together with mutual respect. Captain Rex of the 501st was also reputed to have excellent relations with his Jedi general and commander. General Secura and Commander Bly as well."

"Propaganda. It couldn't have been anything more than propaganda. To think that a Jedi would treat a clone as anything other than a meat droid. I was glad to pull the trigger when the Jedi went traitor."

He saw the Togrutan flinch at that. Then she put her hand to her belly. "Sorry. She's very active these days."

Jaac inspected her. "Does it hurt? When it moves?"

"Not really," replied Soka. "But sometimes it's unexpected."

"Does it ever hurt?" He asked as his single eye caught hers. "Do you know how it goes all the way or is this your first time?"

Soka blushed, turning a vibrant orange. "The last two weeks are miserably uncomfortable and giving birth hurt but it was a relief also." She smiled. "You welcome a stranger into your home who will never be a stranger again."

Jaac licked his lips, fear in his eyes. "Does it _ever_ hurt enough to give them up?" He looked once again at his laughing group of children, now all four playing some game of tag. Kier glanced at him, a rare smile of his lip and a question in his eyes. Jaac smiled back at him and gestured for him to keep playing. "Why did some fool woman give up Bird? And why were Nub and Nac just left in the park to die?" He turned back to them. "Kierzon's parents died in the battle but he remembers them and he knows they loved him. But the others," Jaac shook his head. "They don't have anyone who loves them."

"They have you," replied Saoha. "And don't try to say you're just a clone and don't know how to love. I know that's a lie. Even if you aren't sure."

Jaac thought about it, but only for an instant. It was uncomfortable to think about what might have happened to Bird or to his younger sons. Death by exposure, by dehydration and sunstroke, was a cruel death. Why hadn't their caretakers been kind and merely broke their neck for a swift death.  Though, in the end, Jaac was glad they hadn't.

He shook his head and continued where he'd left off. "There weren't many of us originals in the company after Order 66, but we were optimistic about what was coming." Jaac rubbed the back of his hand against his face and his eyes got a distant look. "A more naive bunch of kids you can't imagine. Kier could have told us what would happen next."

"Nothing improved." Soka's voice was kind. "It just got worse, didn't it?"

"The new commander didn't hate us. We didn't inspire that much emotion in him at all. Most of my brothers were dead. Slain by our Jedi general in useless endeavors. The few of us that remained tried to stay together, but the new commander split us up among the others." Jaac winced. "He said we were all the same. He took away our names, our colors. They looked like us, Kamino clones. But..." His face twisted. "They were different." He looked around and shrugged. They were listening and there was something womanly soft in their eyes. Compassion? Pity? He shifted uncomfortably, not use to undivided attention, not use to a woman's attention, not use to anyone listening to him.

"Five years ago, we came here to battle. There was a reason but I don't remember what it was. I do remember that I didn't care for it. By then there was only me, Nub One, Nub Two, Nac and Sergeant left of us originals in the company. Everyone else was one of the new guys. In spite of our orders, we managed to group together during battles. We'd get demerits," he shrugged, "but that didn't matter to us anymore. This time we were around Sergeant who'd taken a blaster wound to his lower back and was slower because of it. That confused us for a while. Sergeant never turned his back to the front lines and we figured maybe there was a sniper behind us. Nub One was point. He walked into a wall of blaster fire and our helmets clicked him dead before he hit the ground. Nub Two was bringing up the rear and he figured it out. The new guys weren't trying too hard to avoid shooting us." Jaac shrugged again. He wasn't anything more than a leftover clone. "They didn't aim for us; they simply targeted whatever was in front of us without much regard for our safety."

"I'm sorry." The Zeltron put her fingers on his arm. This time he didn't move. Her fingers were cool and moist on his arm; welcome in the hot dry air. "I'm sorry you had to experience that betrayal."

Again, Jaac shrugged. It was all in the past; almost as if the experience belonged to someone else, besides she'd betray him as soon as Mr. Mean-and-Tough arrived, but maybe they'd take him up on his offer. He expected a counteroffer, maybe four thousand for his children and he'd accept that. Kier was young, but considered an adult, and he was smart. He'd take care of the younger ones.

"So we had to keep moving forward while making sure to stay out of line between the rest of the company and the enemy. Sergeant didn't make it. He got shot twice more from behind then took a blast in the chest. A little time in bacta and he could have survived any of those wounds, probably all of them. The medic didn't answer our call, said he was busy." Jaak rubbed his chin. "He probably was, he was our last one. Nub Two took a hit in the leg and couldn't stand. So we left him, we'd be back. A seismic shell hit him before we'd gone fifty paces. Neither Nac nor I could stand being shot at by our own company, so we charged the enemy. Straight forward, straight on. We both went down."

"They left you behind?" murmured Soka.

"In a manner of fashion." Jaac shook his head slowly. "We won the battle. Afterwards, the company built a funeral pyre for our dead. Apparently they don't send bodies back to Kamino anymore. I was concussed pretty badly but I was conscious. I moaned. I moved my arm. I _kriffing_ grabbed one of them around the wrist! And they still threw me on the pyre. I think Nac was still alive also. At least, I heard someone crying. They didn't even stay to watch."

Jaac stopped speaking for a while then he put his hand to his face, his fist against his forehead then nodded toward the older boy. "Kierzon pulled me out of the fire." There was so much more, but Jaac was silent, lost in his misery.

The Zeltron turned toward the other woman. "Soka." Jaac recognized the tone of voice. She was pleading, though for what, Jaac didn't know.

The Togrutan's face was hard and she shook her head. Saoha got a stubborn look on her face and turned back to Jaac.

"Jaac," she began. "Every time you say Nac's name or Nub's; or when we say your name, you radiate the oddest emotion. Can you tell me where those names come from?"

Jaac shrugged. "It's what the Jedi named us. Jaac. Just another anonymous clone. Nub. Non useful body. Nac. New annoying clone. It's what Rancisis named us. Six names for the entire company.  I was actually Jaac 14." He shrugged again. The Togrutan woman paled slightly, a look of consternation on her face.

"Why did you fire on the Jedi?" Again the question came from Saoha.

"I hated him." Jaac replied truthfully.

"Would you have fired on other Jedi?" she asked softly. "On padawans – younglings in training? On children?"

"Now? No," he shook his head. "There's too much experience between me and the guy I used to be. Back then? Yes." He turned his head down the pathway. They didn't know it, but the remains of the funeral pyre were in the park, several klicks further down the path. "How could we be expected to act as anything other than what we were made to be?" He asked and they could hear pain. "We gave them everything. What did they want of us? What more could we have given?"

There seemed to be an argument of looks and glances between the two women. Then Saoha turned, once more, toward him.

"Jaac, if we took your children someplace where they'd be safe and as happy as they could be without you, what..."

"Whatever you want." He replied quickly. "I haven't killed anyone in a long time, but I'd take out anyone you wanted dead. I'd go for the emperor himself if that's what you asked. I'd sign myself over as slave to you. It's legal under Thvenyan law. I'm strong, smart enough to learn almost anything, and have a good fifteen, maybe twenty years in me. Depends on what kind of work I'd be doing." He scowled. "I can't think of anything else you could use me for, but if you have better ideas, I'd do it."

"How easy would it be to get you and your children on a ship in the port?" It was the Togrutan; she seemed the more pragmatic, in spite of losing whatever argument had passed between her and the Zeltron, in spite of her angrily pursed lips.

Jaac thought deeply then sighed. "I wouldn't try stowing away; there are five of us and the chances are remote that we'd make it. My penalty would be death. I'm not a person. Same with Kier, he's an adult. The others – maybe they'd be marked into slavery, maybe exposed. So it would have to be legally." He glanced down at the sandstone boulder. "We go to city center and I sign all of us over to you as slave and minor children of a slave. There's a fifty credit registration for me and ten credits for each child. There's no identification required, they 'print me right then and there. There is a day's wait before you could ship out, in case I'm insane and have escaped from some asylum.  They check that." He shrugged. "What idiot but a madman would confirm himself as a slave?" He was quiet, seeming to have second thoughts. "Take care of my children and I'll be loyal to you for the rest of my life. I'm worth the credits."

Soka smiled, though her voice was sad. "We know you are, Jaac."

* * *

Two things surprised Jaac.

They didn't treat him as a slave and there was no Mr. Big, Mean, Tough or Jealous.

There were four cabins in the ship and they'd given Jaac and his family two of them. Soka even offered her cabin, saying she would sleep in the big bed in Saoha's cabin if he wished. Bird seemed to like Saoha and she volunteered to keep the child in the cabin with her and Soka.  Jaac declined both offers.

The moment the flyer hit hyperspace, Saoha handed him the papers that made him a slave. To their consternation, Jaac declined those as well. "It's an agreement. Legal and binding to all parties. You'll take care of my children. I will be your slave."

"Oh, dear," murmured Saoha.

Soka laughed. "We'll let," she paused then shrugged. "We'll let our husbands figures it out."

They were fed well, there was water whenever they desired and Jaac wept as he took a shower instead of wiping parts of his body with _guwy_ and clean sand as he'd been doing for the past five years.

The children had played in the water, laughing and splashing, but Kierzon had come out of the shower round-eyed in amazement and fear.

"Papa," he'd asked quietly, his light brown hair damply curling on his neck. "What is the cost?"

"It's been paid, Kier." Jaac spoke in the ship's evening as Nac and Nub drifted to sleep with drowsy eyes. Bird was curled up by the pillows, already asleep.

"But _what_ is the cost?" Kier insisted in a low voice to not wake his sibs and Jaac would only shake his head.

"I'll make it worthwhile, papa. I will." Kier vowed knowing the cost was too high for Jaac to tell him.

Jaac hugged one arm around KIer's neck. "I know you will, my son."

Jaac kept away from the navigation console, he didn't want them to think he had any plans beyond what he had promised even if the Zeltron could read his feelings. Kierzon was interested and kept them busy with questions only occasionally listening to Jaac's admonishment to 'not bother them'. At least they weren't angry and patiently gave Kier grounding in flight navigation and procedures. Jaac hoped they would let Kier have some sort of higher training, he was smart.

As they came upon a planet, Soka asked him and the children to go into the rooms. She smiled at Kierzon. "You can stay in the co-pilot's seat, Kierzon, but stay out of the way of Saoha. She has a call to make over the holo to the destroyer circling the planet." She smiled. "I think it's over, but we'll find out soon."

They went into Jaac's room; Nac and Nub playing with a droid ball and Bird, as usual, in Jaac's arms.

The heard the holo and Jaac jerked as he heard, for the first time in five years, the voice of another clone. He looked at Soka and she nodded. "We can't let them see you," her voice was gentle. Jaac had half-believed they would turn him in anyway.

They heard Saoha's laughter. "Thank you, captain." Her voice developed a purr and Soka put her head in her hands, her fingers covering her face. "You know, Captain," Saoha's voice went husky and Soka, sitting next to Jaac in the cabin was shaking and bit her hand.

"Are you alri…" Jaac asked as quietly as he could.

"Fine," the Trogruta whispered through a grin. "Listen."

Saoha continued. "I've really enjoyed our conversations."

"All by the book, ma'am," replied the clone on the holo.

"Of course, Captain Cutie. By the book. I appreciate the news you have given me." She turned off the holo with a chime of silver laughter. "All is well, my sister. Captain Cutie has given us leave to land."

"They're open." Soka's voice was soft with relief as she took over the pilot's console. "The port is open and the epidemic is over." She glanced over to Jaac with a mild frown. "Was it all just to get you?" He didn't understand what she meant.

Then she turned back to the console and her hands moved skillfully over the keys as she spoke to ground control. She angled the flyer down into the nighttime shadow of the planet, towards the darkness of rural areas.

"Jaac, please make sure everyone is secure. We'll be doing a rolling loop shortly. Then we'll be on the ground." Jaac caught the anxiety in her voice, her worry about the epidemic. He remembered that she had at least one child already born and a husband she had mentioned. He tousled Bird's hair as he locked her in the seat. He could understand her fears.

There was a man waiting there when they landed, Jaac could see the outline of him in the dimness. Soka ran to him and he met her halfway with open arms, bending his head to hers, only the short-cut blond hair distinguishable in the grey darkness. Jaac heard laughing sobs but didn't know if they were Soka's or the man's.

"We could run now, papa," whispered Kierzon as he gestured to Saoha making her way down the hill toward some buildings. "They're not paying attention."

Jaac shook his head as he watched the Zeltron make her way along an obvious pathway. "I've made a bargain. Besides … She's Zeltron, Kier. She followed your emotions from the port to me without knowing us. Now, I think she could follow us almost anywhere on this planet. The other one, Soka, she's fast." He paused. "When I wore white armor we called something that fast 'Jedi-quick'."

"Sa!" called out a voice and Saoha paused, looking to one side of the path. Suddenly there was a man there, giving her a hug and a soft kiss and laughing; picking her up off the ground into his arms. She was laughing back and hugging him.

Jaac brought his fist to his lips. That voice. It was Sergeant's voice, and Nubs' and Nac's. It was the voice of his brothers. He looked back to the man holding Soka. He heard other voices, familiar voices, in the trees nearby.

"Riven, go tell Fives and Echo. They're in the house. Sketch, too." That was from the man holding Saoha.

"Someone let Cody know." It was another voice, high in the trees.

"I'll go to Jester's." A man, the same voice, was already moving quietly in-between some large rocks.

Jaac looked back to Soka, his mouth open in confusion. She was holding hands with the man, wiping tears from her eyes. The man, tears in his own eyes and a wide grin on his face as he drank in the sight of the Togrutan, was a clone in spite of his light blonde hair. Jaac dropped his chin warily. He could be one of the new ones. There weren't too many of the originals left that he knew of.

"What's your designation?" He asked harshly before the other clone could say a word.

"My name is Rex." The blonde man replied, laughingly. "My _name_ is Rex."

 


	19. Epilogues

* * *

 

**ARMOR**

Rex & Cody

"I'm going home, Cody. I've been fighting all my life and I'm tired of it." Rex smiled as he handed Cody his gear bag and the helmet from the ship's cargo area. "I suspect you'll need this."

"You'll still need to fight I suspect." Cody ran his fingers over the old phase 1 helmet. Even modified and remolded in places, it was trimmed in the royal blue of the 501st. Had Rex left that as a message for those with eyes to see? The Jaig eyes Rex had earned on Kamino had been elongated. Cody twisted the helmet. At different angles he could see the Jaig eyes, at another angle they became the horns of a mythosaur.

Rex nodded. "Home is Shili for the moment. It's a beautiful, fierce place but I don't expect the empire to ignore it for long."

Cody handed back the helmet. "You'll need the armor, Rex. It's only a matter of time."

"We're not supposed to have time." Rex chuckled. He pushed the helmet back into Cody's hands. "No. When the Empire comes, I'll use whatever I have. Most likely we'll leave the planet as a family." He shrugged. "What happens then…? You'll need the armor before me and more than I would." He laughed softly. "Echo has his and we'll share."

He glanced down the slope to the front yard where Barin was playing with Keeli, Bird, Nac, and Nub, where Echo was holding Aureki in one arm and Ahsoka in the other as they sat on the grass watching the children. "We'll use whatever we have." He looked at Cody, sadness in his gaze and bit his lip. "You should go with someone. I can come…"

Cody laughed and set his hand on Rex's shoulder with a shake. "No, Rex. You have family. If you came with me, Echo and Ahsoka would soon follow and then Aureki and she would hate always moving. Never mind the children." For an instant he thought of Barriss and Gree and the tiny potential of humanity that had been destroyed and felt the beads heavy on his wrist. He gave Rex a half-grin. "I won't be going alone though."

Rex put his hand over Cody's on his shoulder. "That's good, Cody. We weren't made to be loners. Who is going with you?"

"Jesse."

"I don't know if he's…" Rex grimaced. There's an incident in his past…"

"I know, Rex. He told me. He told me about not passing his psyc and he's told me about Elarlu Cihon.  He had Sula and Saria talk with me about his mental stability.  Cass and that little family has been good for him. He isn't self-destructive and I think coming with me will be," Cody spread his hand, gesturing to the land around them. "As good for him as the peace that's here." Cody looked out toward the fields, then toward the thermal pool where Baffle was planning a new home. "He'll have this here to look forward to, but I don't think he'll come back."

Rex shook his head in agreement. "Not to stay, anyway but convince him to return occasionally. You too."

Cody nodded as he ran his fingers over the rough surface of the helmet. Deep gouges looked as if something had grabbed and gnawed on it. "Looks like it's been through some battle."

"Nah, those are just stylistic modifications to make me look imposing for hire." Rex grinned and Cody laughed, knowing there were untold stories to this armor.

He glanced up into the mirror of Rex's eyes. "I've heard rumors. Rumors of rumors and smoke and mirrors. I'm going to Mandalore."

"Not Tatooine?" Rex looked surprised.

"Why would I go there?" He grinned. "I'm not one for bounty hunting or bodyguarding the Hutts."

"To see…" Understanding dawned in Rex's face. "No one's told you," he whispered, mostly to himself. "Sit down, Cody. This will be a surprise."

Cody sat, the armor thigh plates in his hand.

"You're not as good a shot as you think."

"No surprise there," grunted Cody, mildly wondering how the armor would look with a thin strip of gold along the blue. Definitely a message for those seeking.

"You missed General Kenobi."

Cody's expression didn't change but his fingers stopped where they were on the armor. "Kenobi's alive?"

Rex nodded. "Echo and I went to see him when … well, about a year ago." Rex looked down at the ground. "I was being a sheb-headed di'kut but he and Echo were almost old friends by the end of that afternoon."

Cody shook his head softly. "He didn't try to kill you? For what you'd done? For what we all did?"

Rex pursed his lips sourly at being reminded and rubbed his hands. He brought up the subject. "He's a forgiving sort of man, I think. But to him, we were just two clones looking for a padawan. You were his commander. You were…" Rex paused, wondering if he'd guessed right. "You were friends."

Cody nodded his head sadly. "A traitorous friend who missed killing him by his good fortune alone." He looked at the helmet face on, seeing only a sliver of his reflection in the slit visor. He nodded, a sad expression on his face. "Tatooine, then. To apologize." Cody gave Rex a smile which didn't reach his eyes then a mirthless laugh. "And give him an equal chance to shoot back."

Boil

The hard, harsh man handed Jesse his armor. "Once you find a helmet, you can set the frequency to match Cody's. But be careful, most of the newer helmets have passive coding. Undetectable until you hit an Imperial electronic line," he was saying as he picked up the chest plate. "I'll tell you what to look for." He looked at the chest plate for a moment, his hand shaking in the coolness of the evening, then pushed it abruptly at Jesse. "You'll need this part too."

Jesse grabbed it and looked at it. A chest plate. Simple, recently painted a matte gray color before going into Issuya. "Of course I'll need it," he began.

"Not that." Boil grabbed and flipped the flat piece over in his hand, showing Jesse the interior of the armor. "That."

It was a picture, childish and brightly colored, laminated to the interior of the chest plate. A Twi'lek child, garishly green, was holding onto the hands of two armored figures. Behind the figures was a scribble of red-brown stones; in front of them were lines of blue and green with blossoms of orange and yellow. Jesse had been on Ryloth. He'd seen its deserts and knew the value of water there. It was a touching picture even if crudely rendered. He was still for a moment.

"You can remove the picture," he said to Boil. "Keep it for yourself." His finger reverently touched the inside of the chest plate. It was smoother on the face of the Twi'lek, as if Boil had touched that portion many times before.

"I'll do that if you don't want it." Boil waited.

"I like it." Jesse's voice whispered. "It's… it's right."

"It was home." Boil said. "For me anyway. It was always home; where there was Numa." His finger touched the picture, perhaps for the last time, then drifted to one of the troopers then the other, "and Waxer and me." He smiled and looked at Jesse. "I thought you might like it."

"I do, Boil. Thank you." He swallowed hard. "I think I'll ask Sketch to put a picture of Elarlu inside the back plate." He looked up at Boil. They all knew who Elarlu Cihon was now. Jesse had told everyone his story. "Sort of pushing me onward and having my back all at the same time."

Boil nodded. "I think that would be a good idea."

"Thank you, Boil."

 

**Considering the future**

 

Late Night Contemplations

Quad was still breathing hard when she laughed, her cheeks flushed with pleasure, and playfully rolled him onto his back, kissing his face, his lips, even his hair. Her laughter started his and he was chuckling, his chest moving as she clung to him.

Quad's arms came around her, holding her next to him, enveloping her in his warmth. She looked at him, love in her eyes so evident, he caught his breath, emotion so intense it was painful to see.

He soaked it in.

Quad wondered if he could even wait a year to ask her to marry him; he'd talk to Cut tonight or tomorrow about his plan. He loved Shaeeah, he knew that now.

"Anything, Shaeeah, anything for you." Quad whispered softly against her cheek.

* * *

Quad entered Jester's house by the kitchen door. Cut was there at the table, a surprise given how weak he still was. Quad immediately decided to escort Cut back to his house. He could talk to him then; let him know he loved Shaeeah; that he'd work the fields and wait a year to propose then build her a house and wait another year before he married her.

He glanced around, wondering if this was one of those meetings. It would explain Cut's presence. Rex and Cody were also there as well as Kix, Echo and Jester. The new guy, Jaac was also there with his son, Kierzon. They had been trying to bring him up to speed. The smell of caf scented the air.

"Sorry for intruding." Quad began. "I can leave…"

Cody interrupted him. "Not an intrusion, Quad.

"That part's over," chuckled Rex with a nod at Jaac. "Now we're just talked about life and women."

Quad grinned. "Good subjects. I was just going to cook myself a late-night breakfast but I'd much rather have a caf and Suu's bread and jam with company."

"You can have my chair," offered Kix as he stood and rinsed his mug then set it to dry. "I'm off to bed. He smiled. "I have an actual bedroom. All mine. Sketch is helping me work out a wall design." He glanced shyly down at the floor. "Like we used to do to our armor."

"I'd like to see the design before we leave." Rex took another sip of his caf.

Kix laughed. "Want to make sure it's 501st blue?" He moved toward the back of the house. "It is, captain. It is." The men laughed in pleasure, all save Jaac who was too new to laugh, but even his lips curl up as he ducked his head and whispered something to Kierzon.

Quad, a mug of hot caf in hand, sat where Kix had been. He reached for a piece of the remaining bread and slathered it with berry jam.

"How do you know Suu made the bread?" Cut tilted his head and observed Quad chewing on a bite, his eyes closed.

"The taste," mumbled Quad. "Beside, I saw them baking earlier this evening. Suu, showing Cass. Riposte and Edge are very eager to have her learn Suu's secrets. Aureki's too."

Cut laughed, the other men joining in. "I was one lucky clone to land here. She is the best cook in this sector and I am one well-tended man." He was quiet for a moment and suddenly turned serious, his fingers trembled. "I was afraid she would have to put me in the ground." Cut shook his head. "I can do anything for my Suu," he said. "Except live as long as she wants me to live."

Quad listened, suddenly alert.

"Now, she's going to be putting at least a couple of us into the ground together." Cut leaned back in the chair, still not quite strong enough to stand or walk for any distance but too much an active trooper to sit still for any length of time. He held up his hand and ticked off names on his fingers. "There's me. Edge has already said he likes Saleucami and wants to stay. Shy isn't going anywhere. Jester's staying. Saria will be taking care of him and Kix, but I can't see Suu and her not helping each other. Probably Cass too. Jester says Sketch will be coming back. Baffle and Riposte have taken a liking to Cass. How many more men will our family have to bury in the space of a year or two? Sinker? Jaac? Quad?" Cut shook his head as he looked at each man in turn.. "That will be one hard year. The death of ten, eleven men."

"Don't think I'll stay," mumbled Jaac. "Saoha says there's a river near where our brothers live on Dantooine."

Cut acknowledged the statement with a nod.

"That's still a lot of men to die so close together." He looked at Cody. "Are men going to be coming back here to die among brothers, Cody? What about you? Jesse? Riven? Our kitchen pilots? What if you don't find anything? Are you going to return to Saleucami?

"Don't borrow trouble, Cut." Cody tore a chunk off the fresh baked bread even as he pushed the loaf toward Jaac and slathered some jam on it. "There are a lot more things could happen between now and then."

Jaac pulled some bread off the loaf tentatively then reached for the jam, handing both to Kierzon as he finished. As usual, Kierzon took a single level dollop of jam. Jester, next to the boy, sighed, grabbed the spoon from Kierzon and dug it into the jam, dropping the large lump onto Kierzon's bread. Kierzon's eyes grew round

"We make it, Kierzon. Take as much as you wish." Jester told the youngling. "Yai-yai is rare. If Dare offers you any, take only a small bit; you don't need to gain weight and muscle mass like him, but the things we make here – take as much as you desire."

"Yes, sir." Kierzon's voice was as quiet as his eyes were big. He looked at Jaac for permission. Jaac nodded and Kierzon smiled. "Thank you, Jester."

Cut's voice continued after a moment's smile at Kierzon. "Cody, I am talking about the best possible outcome. Losing a brother sooner is not something I'd prefer."

Rex took a heavy breath. "You're right Cut, but there is nothing we can do about it except prepare for it." He looked down at the dark surface of his caf as if peering at the unknown future. "I try to make sure that every day is wonderful for my wives, I try to make sure that Barin knows I love him. I try to experience everything as if I can take the memory with me when I die."

"It will break their hearts." Cut spoke in a soft voice, barely audible to Quad or the other men at the table.

Jester only nodded, pushing the bread aside as if it were suddenly unpalatable.

Quad felt a chill run down his spine.

_Anything for Shaeeah's happiness._

Even giving her up? he asked himself.

* * *

_Was his promise to her?_

" _Anything."_

_Or was it "Anything to bring you joy?"_

Shaeeah saw Quad come out of the barn. He saw her, hesitated just a moment then strode toward her as she watched Keeli play in the grass.

She smiled at him and it ripped Quad's heart to pieces.

"Hi Quad. What were you doing in the med barn?" He loved her voice. He could listen to it all day. Sometimes she'd shyly sing a song, usually to Keeli. More often her voice was filled with questions and considerations. It was filled with laughter. It was more precious because he'd only be hearing it for a short time longer.

He looked at her with sad eyes, eyes full of love. "I was setting up my psyc." He rushed his words, trying to get it over quickly. "I've decided to leave as soon as my psyc is cleared. I'm going to Dantooine. Ahsoka and Saoha said it's a good place and there are a couple of other men planning to go when they're done. Countdown, Kaver." He looked at the grass at his feet, at Keeli then glanced into her eyes again. "Probably within a five day."

"Would you ever come back?" Her voice was without inflection, without interest, as if she knew the answer. She was looking down also.

Quad shook his head. "I don't think so."

Shaeeah's head dropped further. "Why not?" she whispered, so obviously hurt.

Quad wanted to grab her, hold her and hug her. He wanted to stroke her face and tell her he'd stay until he died. He wanted to tell her he had discovered what love was and it was her. Instead he was silent for a moment. "Because you're here."

She looked up quickly, surprise on her face, and saw his tears.

"I can't stay, Shaeeah." He gave a lop-sided grin that was half grimace. "And it's not your parents stopping me. Or how young you are. I could make a good case for staying here. I could even wait a year or two to satisfy them I'm serious about you. For you to become a little more grown up, give you time to explore your choices. It's what I had originally planned."

"Then why, Quad?"

"Because I'll break your heart and I love you too much to do that." He looked at the grass. "You'd be burying your father and me around the same time. Putting us in the ground together; far too early. Me and your father. Whoever else stays. You and your mother. And that's not the way things are supposed to happen."

He wiped his face with his hand. Her hand was there as well, clasping his fingers.

"In twenty years, Shaeeah," his voice quivered. "Biologically, I'll be in my seventies. You won't even be thirty-five."

She stepped nearer and softly dropped her forehead against his chest. "You're breaking my heart now, Quad."

"I know. Mine too. But this is only a little break, after just a couple of months. A greenstick fracture of the heart. Imagine after a couple of years." He sucked in a breath of air. "Imagine after two decades of loving." He put his arm around her shoulder, gave her a soft kiss on her forehead, barely brushing her lekku as tears started streaming from her eyes. "Go on inside, love. I'll watch Keeli."

* * *

Shaeeah ran past Cut and Sketch sitting at the table with their caf, tears running down her face.

"Shaeeah," Cut called, but she ran up the stairs, ignoring her father's call and the startled look of Sketch.

Cut turned to Suu at the kitchen door, who looked equally confused for just a second before she spoke, "She had Keeli."

Cut stood, "I'll find him. Probably one of the men has him." It was common for Keeli to be passed from one person to another throughout the day.

Cut found Keeli just out the door in the front yard and called back to reassure Suu.

Quad was watching the toddler, holding him high in the air, the child laughing. Cut strolled over leaning lightly on the cane.

"Hey, Quad." Cut walked slowly, carefully, on the dew-damp grass.

"Cut." Quad nodded, still holding Keeli, unhappiness on his face, his body stiffly anxious.

"Would you happen to know why Shaeeah ran up to her room crying?" Cut stood at a slight angle from Quad, not confrontational, merely curious.

Quad didn't have to answer; Cut saw the answer in his body. Quad lowered Keeli to the ground.

"Yes, sir." Quad's voice was quiet and Cut raised his eyebrows at the 'sir'. That word was rare now among the men. "I told her I had scheduled everything in order to go to Dantooine."

"Why?" asked Cut and Quad frowned at the question.

"Why what, sir? Or maybe, which why?" Again with the 'sir'.

"Let's start with why is she crying?"

"She thinks she loves me." Quad looked miserable.

"Do _you_ think she loves you?" asked Cut, sitting on the bench at the edge of the porch and gesturing for Quad to do the same. Keeli squirmed himself back into Quad's arms, and Quad held him tightly, almost like a shield between Cut and himself.

"She's just a kid, sir. It's just a small infatuation." Quad let go of Keeli, who'd begun voicing his displeasure at being held so tight. Immediately, Keeli climbed down from the bench and began inspecting the grass.

"Just a kid?" Cut shook his head. "Less and less, I think of her that way." Cut put his hand to his chin. "Next why. Why are you leaving?"

"Ahsoka and Saoha say that Col's clan is open to new men. They know we're clones and still they welcome us. Dantooine sounds like a great place to start a life."

Cut stared at him a moment, shaking his head. "Quad, I've been my kids' father for over eight years. They lie a lot better than you do without half your effort."

Quad lifted his hands in defeat. "It's just an infatuation, sir, on both our parts. I recognize it and she doesn't. I'm just going away before …" His voice faded.

"Before what Quad?"

"Before it goes too far, sir." Quad's head was down. He hoped Cut didn't realize it was already too late. Cut was silent and Quad glanced to see Cut inspecting him.

"Is that what you want?"

"Yes, sir."

Cut sighed. "You realize that she'll probably follow you as soon as her mom lets her."

"No, sir. She'll forget about me by then." Quad's voice was misery.

"If you say so, Quad." Cut stood. Quad also rose from the bench, watching Keeli pulling blades of grass.

"I have one more question, Quad."

"Yes, sir?"

"How far is too far? Should my daughter go see Saria in a couple of weeks?"

Quad's eyebrows pulled down in honest curiosity. "What for, sir?"

That should have been an answer, but Cut remembered how naïve he'd been. "Pregnancy, trooper. Is there a possibility my daughter is pregnant?"

"I … I.. don't know," replied Quad hesitantly. He looked at the ground. "I didn't think of that, sir. I'm not totally sure how that happens, sir.  Kamino cut a lot of non-essential training to get us out in the field early."

Cut groaned; mentally reminding himself to have a talk with Kix to ensure Kix had a talk with everyone labeled 'Essential Training; Social Relations with Civilians' or 'How Women Get Pregnant!'

"Pregnancy happens, Quad, when little brother meets little sister."

Quad turned pale. "Every time, sir?" He asked softly.

"No, not necessarily every time." Cut replied. "It's not that cut and dried for humans or most humanoids. But I will take that as a yes, Shaeeah needs to see Saria. What are you going to do Quad, if Shaeeah is pregnant?" Cut thought he saw a glimmer of hope, of freedom, on the man's face.

Quad nodded. "If she is pregnant, I'll stay here on Saleucami, sir. I'll marry her if you'll let me. I'll take care of her, take care of the baby." Quad looked almost happy through his misery. "If you'd let me, sir."

Cut sighed. "We'll worry about that if it happens. At the moment, if you're serious about going to Dantooine then I'd suggest you minimize seeing Shaeeah. It might make it easier." He looked at the man with compassion. "On both of you. Talk with me or, if you must, my daughter, before going to Dantooine. We'll see what happens then."

* * *

Cut climbed the stairs holding tightly on the banister. Suu was outside supervising Checkout and Backup clean up after breakfast and Shaeeah should have been helping them. Sketch had told him she had come down a couple of steps and pleaded not feeling well. "She was crying, Cut." Sketch had said.

Cut knocked on her door. He'd been proud to make his son and daughter separate rooms with solid walls and doors that shut properly instead of hanging blankets. That had been when they were young. Shaeeah, at least, no longer counted as young. Cut wondered if he was now 'old'. There was a strangeness to think that his daughter could be pregnant at the same time Suu was.

"Shaeeah, it's Cut. Let me in, please." He heard sobs, but he also heard her footsteps. She opened the door, her face pale and her eyes dark from crying. He took a step inside and shut the door behind him, holding out his arms and hugging her tightly as she started to cry again.

"Shaeeah, I've been talking to Quad." She was immediately still, listening to him. His big hand softly rubbed her back. "There is so much I wanted to say before something like this happened. So much I thought you needed to know that I was hoping your mother would tell you because I certainly don't know it. Instead, I'm only going to say if pregnancy is a possibility, make sure to see Saria. Quad seems to think it's possible, but he's not sure. They left out even more of his training than they did of mine." He heard a snuffle-y laugh against his shirt. "Have her see me, not Suu. We'll discuss it further and with Suu when we know for certain."

Shaeeah sniffed, her face against Cut's chest. "I'll go ask Ahsoka today but I don't think so."

"Is that enough time to know?" Cut suddenly realized he might benefit from a class as well.

Shaeeah nodded. "She'll touch me and know. Quad and I, we've only done it twice."

"Not every day?" asked Cut, "When your mother and I …." He shook his head. "I couldn't get enough of your mother." He smiled. "I still can't."

Shaeeah smiled. "We know that, dad. Quad and I like to talk a lot. We prefer kissing and hugging at the moment. Anything more is still a little scary for both of us." She rubbed her tears away and kissed him on his cheek. "Thanks, Cut. For being our father."

"I wish I'd known how, Shaeeah," he answered softly. "All I ever did was love you; love all three of you the best I could before Keeli arrived. I am so lucky, my girl, that you and Jek taught me how to be a father. I'm just getting use to it and neither you nor Jek are children anymore."

 

**Social Interaction Training**

Kix looked over the men gathered in the barn. Ordered by Cut, Kix and Saria as well as the rest of the women, every trooper was present.  They were seated on bales of hay or leaning against the equipment or even on the floor, elbows on their knees listening intently. Edge, Baffle and Riposte were in Edge's loft, paying attention. Sketch was in one of the cots, his leg stretched out before him covered with a blanket and his crutches at his side. Chopper was sitting next to him on a bale of hay, both men with slight frowns of concentration. Jek had been straddling one of the sawhorses with Kierzon but when Kix had begun speaking Jek had rolled his eyes and left the building. Kierzon elected to stay and listen along with his father. Rex and Cody stood by the door, making sure none of the clones followed Jek.

Even Cut was there, "Updating for new information," he had teased as he leaned the chair back on two legs, setting the cane against the wall beside him. "You can never learn enough about women."

That had settled any worries of the men. If Cut was there and Rex and Fives – who were all married and had children – then there was no reason for the rest to feel foolish.

"Any questions?" Kix looked around expectantly. Most of the men were red-faced and blushing. Kix's lecture had gone far beyond what Kamino had ever presented to only some of the ex-troopers. They had finished the biology, the mechanics of the act, much earlier in the morning. The last hours had been on the psychology, on understanding and pleasuring another person. There was a moment's silence as the men glance around, wondering how much their brothers had known of … all that. Kix suspected that most of it had been a surprise to the men.

"Does satisfaction affect a woman's probably of pregnancy?" Countdown asked.

"Whose satisfaction, Countdown? Sex should be an act for the pleasure of everyone involved. Even if it's just yourself." Kix had smiled gently at the men.  "Without a man's satisfaction, pregnancy is less likely but still possible; think on that my brothers. A woman's satisfaction has only minimal effect on her ability to conceive."

"But you're saying that …" Kayl glanced around at his brothers, slightly embarrassed. "That pulling out doesn't really make a different."

There weren't nearly as many chuckles or smiles as Kix would have thought and that made him even sadder at his brothers' lack of knowledge. He was glad Cut had suggested this class and wondered what had been the impetus. Even he'd had to read up and talk with Saria before presenting the information. He had wanted to be ready for any possible question but Saria had laughed at that conceit.

"Not much of one at all," agreed Kix.

"Does that mean," Riven asked softly as he frowned, "that in carrying out Order 37 it is possible…" He couldn't continue and looked at the ground, aimlessly scratching at the packed soil with a twig.

"Yes, Riven." Kix looked at all the men. "Anyone who carried out Order 37 in regards to the interrogation of female prisoners possibly impregnated a woman and may have offspring. Assuming the woman was not terminated." He paused. "However, consider the planets where you carried out Order 37. It is unlikely for a child to grow up in those war-torn places." His eyes became sad. "It is very unlikely for a child to survive whose mother was filled with hate or disgust at the trooper who raped her."

Edge turned pale. "But children are … " he moved his hands as though trying to juggle. "Everything," he finished in a whisper.

"Sex is a physical act with major emotional repercussions, Edge.  What woman would want a daily reminder of war, of what had happened to her against her will?  How could she look on a child who, very likely, would only remind her of her tormentors? If she has another child and only food for one, which one survives? As men, we have our thoughts and beliefs about sex and children.  Women's thoughts and beliefs can be very different. That's why I'm speaking to you.  Women are not just small men and the obvious differences are almost nothing compared to the invisible differences."

Edge had pushed himself back, into the corner of his loft and out of sight of most of the men.  Kix didn't recall if Edge had ever enforced Order 37; he didn't think so.  Most likely Edge was crying simply for so many children who would never live.  Baffle had moved back to sit beside his brother for comfort but Riposte merely nodded with a hard expression as he continued listening, collecting information for their family.

"A woman touching you is indicative that she's interested, right?" Checkout's voice broke into the silence.

"A woman touching you _while looking at you and smiling in regular social context_ is indicative that she's interested _in getting to know you better._ Taking it for anything else will get you in trouble." Kix smiled at Checkout knowing he had asked as much for lightening the mood as for information.

"What about standing up?" Backup murmured.

"In what context, Backup?" Kix pointed out. "It's easier for enjoyment in small, confined places like closets."

"A woman can't get pregnant if she's standing up, I mean."

"Yes she can and it's far more comfortable to use a bed."

"How old before a child becomes a woman?" This was from Waxer, probably gathering information to forestall Numa's open plot to marry him and Boil when she turned sixteen.

"In humans and most humanoid races, there is about a year or two of transition similar to ours back when we were seven. Just later and longer." There were smiles from the men as most remembered old friends and loves, remembered youthful experimentation in the youngling barracks back on Kamino. "Usually around thirteen but it does vary. Check local laws for a basic guideline and if you still aren't sure then she's too young.  However, simply because a young woman is able to have sex and enjoy it does not mean having a child is a good idea. There are higher risks associated with pregnancies of younger women.  Add a handful of years."

"Then why ensure a woman peaks if it's irrelevant?" That was Checkout again.

"If you can't figure that one on your own, I may have to walk out in disgust." Kix raised an eyebrow and waited. Cut was chuckling softly and Rex, his lips contorted, tried not to smile as he stared down into his now-empty mug. Echo was beside him, his hand over his mouth, his eyes closed. Fives was stifling laughter. Kix watched as, individually, each man's eyes blinked as he understood. Kix looked up at Checkout. "OK, Checkout, answer your own question."

Checkout blushed and replied in a tone of total confidence. "So she'll feed you, too."

It took a while for the laughter to die down. Sketch nearly fell out of the cot pounding Chopper's back and Cut did fall out of the chair. Kix merely stood in front of the men, a palm over his eyes.

"As good a reason as any," Cut chortled as he rose with Rex's help.

"What's the _best_ reason then, Checkout?" Kix asked, a little softer. as he moved his hand from his face.

"So she'll want to stay with you and have sex with you more frequently."

"I liked 'she'll feed you' much better." That was quietly spoken from Dare and barely heard by most of the men.

"Gotta have priorities," grinned Chopper and Dare replied with a small smile. Dare was still thin but no longer the skin-draped skeleton he had been.

Cut shook his head and interjected his reply. "Because giving the woman you love such pleasure is joy in itself."

Rex nodded, putting his hand on Cut's shoulder. "Pleasure is your gift to each other; a woman's peak is her gift to you.

"I've been told that it isn't necessary all the time; that a woman coming largely depends on how she feels about you as much as anything else. Don't ever think you've _made_ a woman come." Kix smiled. "If nothing else, an enjoyable time for each party encourages her to return to you for more."

"Can a woman tell who is the father of her child? If she's sharing, I mean." Chopper had a frown on his face.

"With certain tests, yes, it can be determined who is the biological parent. Without the tests, she is unlikely to know the father until the child is born and then only if the child looks like one of the fathers. For us, genetically identical; no, there probably isn't such a test." Kix shrugged. "But if she's sharing it's a moot point, isn't it?"

"Don't know why he's asking or why I'm here," muttered Jaac with a nod toward Chopper. "No woman's going to be interested in him or me. Not with our scars."

Chopper gave a short laughing burst and gave Jaac a grin. "I've already been invited…" He paused and glanced at the ground. Perhaps it wasn't his right to announce he'd be going into Fives' family.

Fives smiled. "Chopper and Sketch will be joining our family. I welcome them, but it was Sula and Saoha who did the inviting."

Kix nodded his agreement as did a few other men. "Physical looks make a good first impression; but first impressions only last an instant. Most women don't go by first impressions."

"What do they go by then?" That was whispered by Dare and Kix only heard it initially because Dare had waved to catch his attention.

"Good questions, Dare. What do women go by?" Kix turned to Cut and to Rex. "I have no idea."

"Ahsoka sometimes runs her fingers through my hair, commenting on its blondeness simply because it isn't dark like everyone else's. But mostly she comments that I'm the center of her life." Rex ran his own fingers over his head. "She grew to love me slowly, I think. Daily interactions, reciprocal duties, sometimes respectful disagreement, aligned priorities. Sometimes we'd sit in the med unit with our men without a word but in complete accord with each other. Sometimes we'd spar, laughing and complementing each other. We learned each other as commander and captain before the possibility of love arrived." He looked into his mug with a twisted frown. "I was a _di'kut_ and tore into her emotionally; I pushed her away because I was afraid of what I was feeling. I should have apologized immediately." He glanced at the floor of the barn. "After five years separate and a year together our relationship outside of the bedroom has its bad moments that go back to me breaking her trust. It will take a long time to mend it. Maybe the rest of my life." He looked at them, once again the captain imparting information to his troops, warning them of the dangers they might encounter. "I will never break that trust again. And if it does take the rest of my life, it's time well-spent."

There was somber silence as the men considered what Rex had said.

Jester touched the wide, red scar on his face. "Saria and I have had our problems; but it was never because of this." He nodded. "I listened to her while she visited Suu, taking her words as important. I went out as her bodyguard to protect her. She said she felt safe. That seemed so important to her – to feel safe; both physically and emotionally. Our problems came from a lack of communication and trust; from not asking each other what was happening."

Cut chuckled. "Suu hasn't decided to throw me over for one of you. I think she fell in love because I provided her with help, with physical strength at first. Sometimes emotional strength when she needed it. I gave her time for herself." He pursed his lips. "In teaching me she gained her own strength and she's told me that my trust in her was the foundation of our love."

Jaac frowned; still not quite believing a woman would ever be interested in him.

Kix leaned back against the wall. "The woman, all of them, have said they will answer any questions you may think of. Lecture is over gentlemen with Saria's final words." He grinned. "She said, no matter how much you know about the _subject_ , an individual woman is always her own mystery."

 

**Dantooine**

Bekia laughed and Tyrlanya glanced her way. It was a joke or some such between Bakia and her friends; Hoscynia, Zashari and Aarlwyr. Tyrlanya was their senior by at least fifteen years. Yet that didn't stop the hurt of Bekia's petty jibs and her sly remarks.

Tyrlanya sighed and folded up the fine thread. There was no use trying to make the fine thread when tense. Fine thread was made from happiness. She pulled out the larger whorl and continued with a medium thread. She could spin on the wheel, of course, but she had started these while overseeing younglings during a health check on the bantha herds and they were portable. Being in the thread house with Bekia was not enjoyable.

It was cool outside; and there was a strong wind beyond the windbreak of the thread house. Tyrlanya took a deep breath; there was frost in the air. Soon it would be winter. Adwr, reading the hairy coats of the nerf and bantha, had said the winter would start mild but turn harsh. Tyrlanya agreed. The first coats of the yearling bantha were coming in soft; she would make some lovely fine threads from the first coats; but their secondary coats were just starting to show _geet_ accumulation. The waxy secretion built up around the individual hairs preventing the melting snows from soaking the young animals. Geet thread was a thick, industrial thread and used for fishing line or nets or sewing hides together. Even the men could spin gleet. Those would be good times in the early spring; the thread houses full of laughter as women showed the men how to spin and strengthen the geet by running it quickly through fire. Many marriages and alliances were begun during geet spinnings.

Tyrlanya frowned. There would be no alliance for her, though. She moved quickly toward her tent to collect something warmer. She took a moment to admire the paintings around the entry; two swirled pillars of blue for water and vivid green for grass. There was a splash of variegated grey and purple for the mountains of Gwydr leading to a deep black peppered with shining white stars and a small moon. Her father had painted them long ago, shortly before his death. Tyrlanya touched the swirl of green she had added and then Bershin's elegant addition of gold to the green. Meeka had been too young, so her hand had been colored then pressed to the leather. Family. Dead or scattered.

Tyrlanya sighed and pulled on the long vest of reversed hide; it would keep her body warm yet free her arms for spinning. She would go down to watch the younglings milk the cows. Adwr would probably be there, Col as well. Tyrlanya liked that her foster sister's faith in Col had been rewarded; he hadn't deserted her. Instead, he had been imprisoned and returned after long years. Tyrlanya gave another sigh though tempered with a smile. Ehveen's child had been a lovely little girl and Col had asked Clan Dsayn if he could adopt her out of the year marriage. The price had been steep but Col hadn't blinked, simply nodded without even bargaining. Adwr told him he should have bargained; that Clan Dsayn would have accepted much less; they expected him to bargain. Col had shaken his head with a smile. "I will never bargain my children." Clan Dsayn had immediately begun an intricate dance of politics and honor.

Col had said that more of his brothers wanted to come to Dantooine and they would arrive soon, though Ehveen had told her Col was worried. Besides the oncoming winter and the difficulty of navigating a flyer around the mountains, Col was worried about Imperial stormtroopers stopping they flyer. He occasionally wondered why they were taking so long and had recently begun to worry more than wonder.

Adwr and Col were both in the milking shed, warmed by the shear mass of bantha bodies. Adwr was smiling and Col laughing, his arm gently over his son's shoulders. It seemed to Tyrlanya, sometimes, that Col simply touched his family to reassure himself that they existed, that it wasn't a dream. Leven and Dub were the same way, touching their wives or even the bantha or the leather of a family's tent in similar amazed belief. Col turned to her with a big smile.

"My brothers have made immigration, Tyr. They will be here within a few hours." He turned to Colehn. "Will you take the news to the thread house and let your mother and the other women know?"

Colehn nodded with a grin, turned on his toe and was gone.

"I think he is the clan's fastest runner," commented Adwr as he and Col watched the boy. Col smiled, his chest puffing with pride.

* * *

Bekia, adorned in her festival finest, glanced in Tyrlanya's direction. "Why she comes, I have no idea." Hoscynia rolled her eyes as she finished braiding Zashari's hair, giving it a final touch as they moved from the thread house toward the large empty area Adwr had designated where the flyer would land.

 _Because I am marriageable age,_ Tyrlanya wanted to say. She wanted to grab the younger woman's hair and pulled it out to make thread. She said nothing; Bekia had the right of it. She was fifteen years older than any other marriageable woman in Clan Gwydr and there were no men interested in her. She sat on the bench by the windbreak, suddenly cold. There were no men interested in her. Not in the tribe and not during festivals. Oh, the men offered enjoyment, the short partnerships of a week or a month, but none offered anything beyond that.

Col's brothers were different. Yes, they were handsome. They worked hard and they learned quickly and they loved their wives. But there was a difference in them, an aloofness, a wariness, a constant watchfulness. Col said it was from fighting war. From Ehveen, Tyrlanya knew Col had nightmares. Chaynwa had mentioned that Dub also had restless nights.

Col and his brothers took great delight in having family, they took even more pleasure in children. Col had Colehn as well as Ehveen's two children from her year marriages. Dub and Chaynwa had fostered her dead cousin's twins. Leven had married into Nargwan's family, the largest family of the clan with the most children; a happy, crowded tent. Even quiet, solemn Pax had chosen a woman with a child from a year marriage.

Tyrlanya had been at a weaving festival when Col and his brothers had arrived at High Keep and by the time she returned they'd all been married or chosen women to court. Not that it mattered, she would have been honor bound to tell them; if someone like Bekia hadn't told them first.

She stood, hurrying to catch the others on the way to the flyer. Even if none of Col's brothers would be interested in her, she was Adwr's foster daughter and Col's foster-sister and she should be there to greet them. Besides, she had never seen a flyer.

Tyrlanya waved at Col as he went by, Colehn beside him, running to keep up with his father's long strides and for the joy of running. Col smiled widely and waved back. Mid-wave he changed the gesture from a greeting to an invitation and waited for her to meet him on the trail.

"Come on, Tyrlanya. I'll introduce you to my new brothers."

Not that it would help. All men wanted children, the wealth of family. Col's brothers wanted family more than most men.

Dub and Gekko were running up to the meeting place, both with big smiles. Dub slowed down as he neared Col. "I've sent one of the older boys out for Pax and Leven with the news. I'm sure they'd want to be here for the short visit."

"Hopefully they haven't gone too far with the herd."

Tyrlanya kept close to and slightly behind Col. It was only partially kinship and partially his promise to introduce her. She didn't think Bekia would make a comment in front of strangers, but lately her words and jibs had gotten harsher. Hoscynia and Zashari had even criticized Bekia, though only obliquely, for her words.

The first person out of the ship was a woman with dusty rose skin and hair of the most amazing purple hue. She wore a skin-tight suit of dull yellow and an overvest of dark blue. Tyrlanya stared in amazement at the way her skin color was enhanced by the contrasting cloth. She wasn't a woman who could hide in a crowd and the colors were glorious. Tyrlanya wanted to weave her.

"Saoha!" exclaimed Dub as he grabbed her and gave her a hug.

Bekia sniffed in disdain.

"Careful, Bekia," warned Col, almost under his breath. "Saoha is well-loved in our family."

"Share," growled Gekko with a grin, at Dub's side, waiting for his own hug from the woman. She laughed and drew Gekko into the hug with an arm.

Then came Col's brothers; brothers of Dub and Gekko and Pax and Leven. Beautiful men, strong and healthy, with the hesitation of newness, with amber-brown eyes and dark hair, packs or duffles of their few belongings slung over their shoulders. Though they all wore heavy boots, they didn't seem to have winter clothing and Tyrlanya automatically catalogued clothing needs, remembering a cache of her brother's clothes in the tent. She would have to open up the seams; Bershin had narrower shoulders than Col's brothers. Heavy winter coats would be needed and she considered possible trades of neighboring clans. She smiled. Clan Dsayn had been embarrassed by the riches Col had paid, they would be glad to provide coats.

"Quad, Countdown," called Col with a laugh and a hug for his brothers. "Welcome, welcome."

Two more brothers came and Dub and Gekko greeted them with smiles and whoops of greeting. "Kaver. Kayl." One gave a shy smile to his brothers; the other looked around with satisfaction on his face.

Then came another woman, Togruta and a youngling. They were followed by two children, perhaps six and nine. Humans, boys, two with brown hair, the youngest with hair of sun-red and eyes the color of sky and grass.

Tyrlanya's brows drew down at this. Were they bringing children? Younglings? The sons of Col's brothers? Oh, she could dream, couldn't she?

"Come on Jaac," called the woman.

Tyrlanya noticed Col's frown. He was angry at something. "It's not a good name, Tyr," he murmured.

The last of Col's brothers came down shyly, his head bowed, to stand next to Quad. He carried a child, a pretty girl-child. Her hair had been oddly cut, but she was beautiful in face and hugged the man tightly around his neck.

Jaac was not handsome. He carried old burn scars on most of his face; one ear was missing and an eye socket was empty. Most of his scalp was hairless and would remain so for the rest of his life. The scars continued down one side of his chest and arm, visible under the crossed-laced tunic. Still, his arm was strong; it was the one carrying the girl, the scars lessened over his neck and shoulder then ended near his elbow. He stared at the ground, afraid to make eye contact with anyone, even his own brothers. His shoulders were hunched as though he expected someone to hit him or push him aside; as though he shouldn't show his face in public.

"This is Jaac, Col." That was the brother Col had called Countdown. "He's a recent addition to the family. We've tried to get him to change his name, but he isn't interested." Countdown put his arm around Jaac's shoulders and Tyrlanya saw him flinch, then pat Countdown's hand so he wouldn't move it away. Afraid, yet learning.

Bekia hadn't waited for introductions. Already she was talking, smiling up at one of the men. He laughed softly. "I won't be looking for a wife for a couple of years." Bekia's words were lost to Tyrlanya, but Hoscynia gasped as Bekia rudely turned away.

Bekia walked past Jaac without a glance. The little girl hugged him harder around his neck, putting her face next to his to soften the rejection. The older boy grabbed Jaac's free hand, glaring with hate at Bekia, and Jaac gave him a quick, small grimace. Tyrlanya thought it was a smile of reassurance for the youngling..

Zashari and Aarlwyr followed Bekia; as they followed her in all things. Hoscynia turned to the man. "I would apologize for my friend's rudeness," she spoke clearly and slowly. "But she is no longer my friend." She turned back to the man named Quad. "So you are not interested in a wife at this time. Could you keep me a bit of company and tell me about hyperspace? I've never traveled except by bantha." Quad gave her a smile.

"If Saoha permits," he glanced at the rose colored woman who nodded. "I can show you inside the flyer and introduce you to more family."

Hoscynia smiled. "I think I'd like that." Col's brother offered her his arm and they walked up the ramp.

Tyrlanya gave a quick gulp. She pulled at Col's tunic.

"Introduce me to Jaac, Col," she whispered. "He has children."

"I would introduce you to all of my brothers, Ty." Col replied absently as he started at the ships entry.

"He has _children_ , Col," she repeated with emphasis.

"You are not insulting her?" That was Countdown and it was as much a statement as a question.

"No, Countdown. Shortening names is actually a privilege of friendship or family on Dantooine, and she is both. Who else is here?"

"Good enough." Countdown inspected her with those golden-brown eyes common to Col and his brothers, then smiled and turned toward the cluster that was Jaac and the children and gave a gesture. "Jaac, this woman wishes to meet you, come closer. Rex and Fives are both there, want to talk with you and the others later. Updating plans." He grinned. "It's been a crowded flight."

Jaac shuffled forward, glaring suspiciously at her out of his single eye. He was less antagonistic than the youngling boy who followed and stared with narrowed, hate-filled eyes.

"Jaac," began Col. "This is Tyrlanya who has asked me to introduce you."

"Greetings Jaac." Tyrlanya bared her courage, prepared for anything from this man made taciturn by experience. "I would invite you to a year-marriage with me."

Col looked at her strangely, but the corners of his lips formed a soft curl, then into a smile. Countdown laughed. "Is that what it sounds like?"

"It is a marriage for the duration of a year," explained Tyrlanya, turning toward Countdown. "It is free of many of the binds of a full marriage. Mostly it is for the tribe, to bring children." She faced Jaac. "but I think it would be best between us as a trial."

Countdown laughed. "Oh, sure, Jaac. There's not going to be any woman interested in you. Aren't you glad you attended class now?"

Jaac ignored him and merely increased his suspicious glare at Tyrlanya. "Why?"

She shrugged a shoulder. "I can give you reasons." She glanced at Bekia who was also staring at her with a sour look. "But perhaps more privately." Her voice was softer. She'd bare her soul to this man who understood what pain meant, but not with Bekia listening. "I will tell you that I have been in year-marriages before. Ten of them. I have never had a child." Her voice was low, this was her shame.

"I have four children. I do not ask for more and I will not leave them to anyone else." He dropped the boy's hand and put his arm around his shoulders, drawing him closer. One of the two younger boys held onto his hand. The red-headed boy was staring into the distance.

"Those are _bantha_!" he exclaimed and Adwr knelt beside him, pointing out the animals.

Tyrlanya nodded. "Your children are your wealth and I would welcome them." She looked into his single eye. "I would be a true mother to them and not merely their father's wife. I will treat them no less than I would my own children."

Jaac nodded slowly. "I think we can talk. I…, it's…" He paused, thinking deeply then his face lost its suspicious look. "This is all new." He looked suddenly innocent and afraid.

"I understand." She reached her hand out for his. It was warm, strong, firm and his fingers curled into hers. Tyrlanya was heartened by this. "Let us go talk in my tent. Afterwards, if you have question I cannot answer, I'm sure Col or Dub would be happy to answer anything."

Tyrlanya heard one of Col's brothers reply to Bekia's flirtation as she and Jaac walked away. "I don't think so. I like my brother."

Jaac heard also but ignored it. Tyrlanya thought he had lots of experience in ignoring people's words. "I think I can make up my own mind without Col or Dub's influence." Jaac glanced at the youngling boy, the other boys standing behind him and Adwr nudging the last in their direction. "May they come? They have a stake in this also."

"Of course," Tyrlanya turned to the boys. "I hope you listen and asked questions when you have them."

"I have one," muttered the sullen youngling. He didn't expect her to stop and give him her full attention. It was unnerving, but after a moment's inspection, he growled in his adolescent, cracking voice. "Do you whip children?"

"It is not common on Dantooine. Usually, punishment is undoing whatever wrong or misbehavior was done. I suppose some parents may whip a child who has been particularly unruly."

"Show her, Kierzon." Jaac's voice was soft and the youngling's lips quivered as his fists clenched and released several times. He gulped and pulled his shirt up his back, turning to show her.

Tyrlanya looked at his back, at the scars on his back. She reached out her hand to touch his back then glanced at Jaac to see if she should. Jaac gave her no clue. Her fingers touched Kierzon's shoulder softly. He pulled down his shirt, removing the scars from her view, from her touch.

"For theft," he said, "Because I was hungry and Jaac was hurt. I stole some fruit. I think I was ten."

"No," she said quietly. "We do not use whips on children. It is abhorrent, it is illegal." No wonder he had eyes of hate. "Even if were not illegal, I would never do so."

Kierzon ignored her words as he moved closer to Jaac but his eyes were less hateful and more contemplative.

They walked silently down the trail for a moment. Then Jaac spoke again. "I have some credits. I'd give you half outright and keep half to be divided among my children as they grow."

"I have my own tent, shares in the clan's wealth and some small wealth of my own." Tyrlanya smiled in pride. "I am the best weaver in Clan Gwydr and have won competitions. When the time comes, I also would provide for their future. Though, in the clan it is common for at least one child to stay with each parent as they grown older."

"Kier is smart. I want him to be more than…"

"More than a nerfherder?" She smiled at him and he blushed but he nodded.

"Yes. More than a nerfherder. More than someone who works with his hands because he has no other choice. I want Kier to have choices."

Tylanya nodded. "Dantooine has a single university and it is open by merit only. There is also an apprentice system for some skills such as weaving, smithwork, mechanics. I have apprenticed three younglings of other clans and, as such, am owed three apprenticeships if he would prefer one of the trades."

She took them to her tent. The finely decorated bantha hide was warm and water-proof. It wasn't the largest tent, but it was large enough for six sleeping rooms if the hides were arranged. She merely kept it divided into her sleeping quarters and the visiting area. Her parents had arranged the purchase of the tent for their family almost two decades ago then died together in a fever. Bershin had gone to breed a different strain of bantha on another planet and her sister had moved in with her husband in another clan. Tyrlanya wondered absently if Kierzon would like a room near the entranceway. She had when she'd been his age.

There were several low chairs as well as cushions; both of textile and fur. She offered blue milk for all then lunch when she found they hadn't eaten. They talked for a while then Colehn called in to invite Kierzon and the two younger boys to help herd the bantha for milking.

"Are visitors welcome," It was Adwr's voice at the door, with several other people by the noise.

"Certainly," called Tyrlanya after a questioning glance at Jaac and his nod.

"Will I be performing a year marriage within the next day or so?" Adwr smiled at them, not bothered by Jaac's scars. Quad was with him as was Hoscynia and Countdown as well as the beautiful dusty rose woman with a brother of Col's holding her around the waist with a strong arm.

"Perhaps." Jaac's voice was even. It had been a good talk with Tyrlanya and he was optimistic that being married to her wouldn't be a hardship. He wanted to ask one of the brothers who had been here a while to find out what kind of woman she was, but if they said she was as truthful as her body seemed to tell him, he had much to look forward to. Though nothing from Kix's class would be relevant.

She wanted family. That much was evident. Ten year marriages and not a single pregnancy. Her tent was full of stored belongings and she'd gone to one and pulled out appropriate-sized warm coats for the boys when Colehn had invited them out. She wanted a daughter like Bird and sons like Nac and Nub. She had even welcomed Kierzon, cautiously and Jaac couldn't blame her for that. She wanted family and if that meant she'd take him, then so be it. He'd talk to her about that later; she wouldn't have to have him in her bed. Still, she had taken his hand, curling her fingers between his as she led them to her tent.

Adwr laughed. "You've been here all morning and most of the afternoon. Most families are starting to prepare evening meal. Col and Ehveen have invited both of you to their tent." He nodded at Jaac. "Your boys are there. Colehn has already taken them to see the bantha and they shared in milking the cows."

"It can't have been that long," frowned Tyrlanya. "We've only been talking for a short…"

"For most of the day," confirmed Jaac, his lips twitching in pleased amusement. He'd been aware of the passage of time; he'd been bred to know it always. But for her, time had quickly passed because it had been good between them. That much he knew and it was gratifying that she'd lost track of time. He had enjoyed talking with her also.

Jaac stood, graceful in his strength and looked at Tyrlanya, then offered her his hand. "I would bring you to Col's as fiancée. Is that permitted? And is there anything special I must do for this year-marriage?"

She blushed as she took his hand and Adwr smiled. "You've spoken in front of a witness of your intention. You need two more witnesses and then I perform a short ceremony in front of a quorum of the clan.

"I will announce this at Col's dinner if that is acceptable." He quirked a non-existent eyebrow at Tyrlanya. "With your approval?"

"I'd like that," she whispered, suddenly blushing, suddenly feeling very feminine, suddenly feeling wanted. She looked up into his eye and slipped her body next to his, under his arm. His face was relaxed, introspective then he suddenly bent his head and kissed her lips, retreating before she could kiss him back.

"I understand that's traditional. Kissing. When getting engaged."

* * *

Jaac frowned and quickly turned down the suncatchers. The fire in the metal pit was merely a soft orange glow. It was late and soon Kierzon and the other children would be asleep in their bundles. The days were busy with learning and they all fell asleep quickly now, with neither thirst nor hunger clawing into their dreams.

Bird had gone from baby silence to absolute comprehension of language in a matter of days and was full of questions. Jaac knew it was because she finally felt safe. They all did. Nub had fallen in love with the bantha and, without asking Jaac or Tyrlanya, had apprenticed himself to the herdmaster, Lukai. It had been Lukai who'd come to the tent laughingly calling for his apprentice who had told them. As adults, they discussed Nub's possibilities and, in the end, Nub was apprenticed to Lukai for a one-year trial to extend in exchange of a year out of one of Tyrlanya's apprenticeships. Jaac had stayed out of that discussion as it involved three other clans, four families and consulting with Adwr. Apparently an apprenticeship was not a simple one-for-one trade.

Nac simply ran and laughed. He followed Jaac as Jaac learned about living on Dantooine from Col and Dub. He followed Tyrlanya to the thread houses and ran errands for the women. He followed Kierzon as he studied, Nub as he learned about bantha and he played with Bird. Nac became a carefree child and reveled in it almost as much as Jaac reveled in his son's playfulness.  Once, Nac had run into the tent hollering for containers – water was falling from the sky. Rain had fallen from the sky and Jaac's little family were the only ones outside in the cold water.

"At least close your mouths when you look up," laughed Tyrlanya gently from the tent's entry, hugged in her warm vest. "So you don't drown." She had sat at the doorway of the tent, smiling, watching them rejoice in water that fell from the sky. Later, Jaac had told her of the desert planets he'd been on – Geonosis, Tatooine and Thvenya. She promised to take them to the river in the spring and teach them all to swim. Nac, Nub and Bird had no comprehension of the word. He didn't tell her that the largest river in Thvenya was narrower than he was tall.

Kierzon had taken a battery of tests. He had failed many of them, but his weaknesses were scholastic rather than intellectual; of being a stranger rather than lacking intelligence. He knew what to study and often read aloud to them in the early evenings. Sometimes he would go to the thread houses and read to the women. They were a hard audience; asking questions or definitions, making him repeat important concepts, asking for proof, his thoughts. After the first time, he read to the women only when he thought he knew the subject.

Tyrlanya offered Kierzon three hangings with which to carve out his privacy of the tent, a room for himself. He asked if he could be near the entrance and Tyrlanya nodded. "There are extra duties associated with being there, but you are well capable." He found out it gave him extra status among the other younglings. It was a place of importance and trust; the first to hear messages and greet visitors, the freedom to leave each morning, the responsibility for the morning fire and, in earlier times, the major defender of the tent. He invited her to call him 'Kier' and promised himself he'd be worthy of trust.

Before the first snows arrived, the nerf were culled; the meat was put in a special tent for smoking and drying; the hides defleshed. Adwr told Jaac that late autumn was the busiest time of the year because so much of their survival depended on it, yet the days were shorter. The tents were moved up the hill next to the thread house, the only solid building, and much closer together, in an oval around an open-ended corral for the tame bantha to gather. A tent for the unmarried women was attached to the thread houses. There was no tent put up for the few unmarried men who were mostly Col's brothers.  They usually spent the night with family, several times in Tyrlanya's tent with them; talking and training. Jaac noted that Tyrlanya didn't seem to favor any of his brothers over him when they moved belongings and the fire pit to spar. He nodded to himself; his gift of children had been sufficient for her heart. For her sake, he wished he wasn't scarred.

Tyrlanya smiled often even though it was the darkness of winter. She had brought out a small loom and was teaching Bird to weave on it while she spun fine thread. Kier was reading for them all; magical stories instead of one of his regular texts. Nub was worrying about his bantha, running fingers through his fire-red hair, and Nac was going through one of the packs of clothing sorting it at Tyrlanya's direction.

"Another baby thing," said Nac as he held up a tiny tunic sack for Tyrlanya to judge. She was giving so many of the baby things to Ehveen, expecting another children at high winter. Not the best time to birth a child, but her sister had never had any problems before – even with her first, Colehn. It was embroidered with green and blue, colors of grass and sky. Lucky colors. Tyrlanya's eyes grew wet as she realized it was the first one she had made, almost twenty years past when she'd been just coming into womanhood and had been so hopeful of the future. When she didn't immediately respond to Nac, he looked at her.

"The stack for Ehveen?" His voice was tentative. Tyrlanya gave a nod, she didn't dare to speak or all the emotion would swallow her. Jaac looked up from the large pot of soup he was making at Nac's tentative tone and saw the tears in Tyrlanya's eyes, her hands shaking as she stopped the whorl and set the thread aside.

"That is quite a pile of baby things, Nac," he interrupted. "Why don't you and Nub take them to Ehveen. You can stop by Lukai's and talk bantha on your way back. Be back before moonrise."

"What if they invite us to dinner?" Nub wasn't quite keen on Jaac's cooking now that they had regular good meals. Jaac hadn't yet mastered the skill and his meals were not always as palatable as Tyrlanya's, although his stews were usually decent.

Kier snickered and Jaac ruefully shook his head. "Then you can stay. The stew might need a day to season into palatability."

The two younger boys quickly pulled on winter coats, fur-in and hooded, and were out the tent each carrying a stack of baby clothes. Kierzon slowly put aside the stories. "I should go also. Colehn wanted me to help braid leather rope."

Jaac gave a nod and his grimace which substituted for a smile. "No more eager for dinner than your brothers," he quipped though he knew Kier was given him and Tyrlanya privacy.

"No. Come on Bird," Kier helped her on with a brightly embroidered warm vest and pulled on a warm, fur-inside coat. Bird was very well-dressed; Tyrlanya had shown early enthusiasm for threadwork. It was more evidence of her desire and love for children.

"Are you ok, Tyrlanya?" Jaac asked softly as his last two children left the tent.

She rubbed her face with her hand. "I am not ill. I simply remember so long ago."

"When your hopes were new and shiny? When anything might come true?" He asked gently, standing and moving next to her.

She nodded then put her hands to her face to hide the sudden flow of tears. He sat beside her, to offer support if she wanted, if she forgot his scars. At his touch on her hand, to let her know he was there, she threw herself against him, hugging him hard around the waist, her face buried in his chest. He put his arms around her, his face into her neck and held her, gently rubbing her back.

"Tyrlanya, what can I do?"

She shook her head. "I am maudlin," she mumbled into his chest. "Being in the tent with my family is joyful, but seeing the baby clothes was…" Her lips quivered again.

"I'm sorry. I know you want children of your own body."

Again she shook her head. "No. That isn't… yes." She frowned and shook her head more firmly. "It's not that."

His lips twisted in what she recognized as a grin as she looked up and blinked her tears away. The burn scars on his face sometimes made it hard to decipher his expression but she was getting good at it. He often ducked his head to hide his scars, though less and less, especially in the tent; their tent, their home. "Very decisive, aren't you?"  His voice was low and pleasant.

"I don't need children of my own body. Bird and Nac and Nub; even Kierzon, they are sufficient. They have rapidly become the children of my heart."

"Then I don't understand." Jaac found she was warm and comfortable against him. He didn't need to move; he'd let her move away from him first.

Tyrlanya was quiet for a moment, simply listening to her breath and the beating of Jaac's heart. He was kind and strong and, most of all, gentle. "My wishes and dreams," she began slowly, "have always included having their father; having a husband." She moved slightly so she could look into his eyes. "You haven't come to my bed." She stated it as simple fact.

He grimaced, a true grimace of pain and regret. "You can't want to bed these scars. I knew you wanted children and I knew you would take care of them like they'd been born from your body. I am simply what you had to take to have Bird and the boys."

"Oh, Jaac," She reached her fingers to his face but he pulled back from her hand. She shifted, facing him as she knelt before him. She grabbed his hands in hers and brought them to her lips. "I wouldn't be bedding scars. I would be loving my husband; a man with strong hands and broad shoulders, a quiet man who observes and notices and does what is necessary. A man who has raised fine children by himself in an unbearable situation." She reached her hand to the side of his face. This time he didn't stop her. Her fingers brushed the rough skin. "If I cannot give you happiness, let me know. There is no censure for dissolving a year marriage and if you cannot have happiness with me then you can search for it among my people."

"I have happiness," Jaac stated, surprised. Did she think she hadn't given him enough? "There is food and water for our bodies, learning for our minds and companionship for our souls. What I have now is beyond what I had ever known to even wish for." He took her hands in his and held them to his lips, merely breathing warmth onto her strong fingers. "For you to offer more is beyond my comprehension. It is something I am not prepared for."

She leaned forward and up, brushing his fire-scarred lips with her own. Her voice was a fierce whisper. "I love you."

Jaac shook his head in disbelief. "Tyrlanya, you asked me to marry you. You took me by the hand and never once did you say I was ugly." He bowed his face over her hands. "You gave us a home, you love my children. I am afraid that if I ask anything more, I will realize this is only a dream."

There was no answer except to once again reach up to his lips with her own.

I've never done this before." It was hardly more than a whisper. Then he gave a small smile. "Four children and I'm still a virgin."

Her palm cupped his face, the rough scars tickling her skin. She could weep that he'd been scarred; that his beauty had been stolen by war, that his courage had been so ravaged by defeat. She leaned against him. Slowly his arms came around her, trusting she wouldn't pull away from him.

"I think a lot of it will become self-evident as we continue."

"Oh, I know Tyr. Most nights I dream of pleasuring you, of being in your arms, of what I would do..." He ducked his head embarrassed. "In the dark. I couldn't bear for you to see my face while we're making love." He was self-conscious about his scars; about how he looked and how his skin would feel to her fingers. "I'm... I'm sorry."

Tyrlanya nodded. "I understand. But as time passes, I will want to see you." Her hands slid from his shoulders to his chest, unfastening the laces of his tunic. "I will want to make love in the daylight. I will want to lie down with you in the soft grass beside the river after a good swim and laugh together as we touch each other."

"I will learn to lose my fear," he bit his lips for a moment, "my wife." 

* * *

 

**Shaeeah and Quad**

So much had changed around the farm in two years, but nothing essential. Dad and mom still looked at each other with passion in their eyes. Jek was becoming a responsible young farmer, but still managed to tease her. Keeli was almost five and Crux was almost two. There hadn't been a moment's twinge of trouble in mom's pregnancy and she and Cut were talking about trying for another child before a child became impossible.

Jester and Saria still lived not far, but their twins were in the tantrum twos and Shaeeah tended to avoid them. Apparently fussiness didn't bother Jester, Saria or Kix. They, also, were talking about another child. Perhaps it didn't matter as much to Kix. He spent a lot of time in Issuya with Sinker, helping Chymdura as much as he assisted Saria and running a small orphanage. He was turning into an amazingly popular midwife on a planet trying to recoup from a devastating population loss. Shaeeah wished he would find someone to love although she wasn't hopeful. He was wonderful at medicine, at helping others, but froze when socially introduced to anyone, male or female, human, Twi'lek, Gran or Wroonian.

Sinker, please beyond belief at his luck, stayed in Issuya. Besides helping Kix with the orphanage, he had a job at the granary and Saria's apartment became his. He often sat outside on the porch, serene in the sanctuary of the little garden he had created there or practicing the exercises Saria had given him to improve his speech. He visited the farm often. The last time he had smiled and said he'd been invited to a party and he'd like to cut the visit shorter. By his blushes and smiles, a woman was suspected.

Sketch had finally returned with a grin, limping only at the end of a long day, and on crutches only when he was very tired. He ran often but not fast and not the distance his brothers ran. Usually, they slowed and paced him, talking and laughing. Jester and Saria welcomed him with love and kisses and the offer of sharing. Shaeeah had cried with gladness to see him walk off the ship. She, also, had welcomed him with kisses. Sketch had raised an eyebrow and Shaeeah wondered if she shared; she wondered if Quad shared. He had sat down one evening with Shaeeah and showed her the drawings he had done; pictures of cities and people. Then he brought out pictures of anatomy; he'd been commissioned to provide artwork for _Verzhain's Guide to Joint Anatomy, 5th edition_. The surgeon had seen his art while Sketch was recuperating and suggested he submit to Verzhain Guides Publishing. Sketch was proud of the job.

Chopper was staying for a visit but declared himself part and parcel of Fives' family. He hadn't married them, yet. He wanted as many of his brothers as possible to be at the party; and that meant Saleucami. Rex and Ahsoka would be coming later in the summer and Chopper was waiting for them in particular; like so many of the clones they were his first love and loyalty.

Saoha and Sula had two children in those small two years as well as Peach who was just leaving the tantrum years. Saoha's golden-hued little boy had Edge's silver-blue eyes. Edge's chin had trembled when he saw the child but no one knew what he and Saoha had decided. When they visited, about three times a year, Edge took over the care of the child.

Cody was already there for Chopper's party though he hadn't known about it until he arrived on Saleucami. He had changed a bit; he was whipcord thin and had new scars as well as a limp in the early morning; he admitted to being too slow to avoid a blast to his hip. It was his second visit. He had returned the year before bringing a cure for the unnatural aging. He'd already taken it to Shili and Dantooine and had, at that time, given the vials for Fives, Chopper and Sketch to Cut knowing they would return to Saleucami. He'd been unable to track Riven, Dare, Backup or Checkout and their vials were also handed over to Cut in hopes that one day they would visit home.

Jesse hadn't been with him but Cody had promised that Jesse would make it by late spring. Jesse did, bringing a dark-haired, brown-eyed sullen child of about four years with him. Told that Edge still spent time in the loft, Jesse had taken the child there and waited. Shaeeah brought them food Suu packed for the scared child, including the last of the yai-yai at the farm for the too-thin pair.

"He's one of the children conceived by Order 37. I call him Crys," Jesse told her as he crammed half the yai-yai into his mouth, washing it down with a gulp of blue milk. The boy was behind him timidly eating bread slathered with a mix of yai-yai and berry jam. "I thought, perhaps, Edge…" Jesse let the sentence fade. Shaeeah knelt and put her arms around his neck, tears in her eyes. He leaned into her. "It is so good to be home, Shaeeah. So good."

Edge and Cass had come to the barn with Riposte and Baffle. Edge had turned to the child and knelt on one knee beside him. "If you want, I'll be your father and Cass will be your mother. You'll be our oldest child. Jesse is part of our family and you will be part of it along with him and Riposte and Baffle. You will never again be hungry or alone." The boy had reached out and taken Edge's hand. Cass had reached out for Jesse's hand and he had given a soft sigh and leaned against her.

Edge never bothered with his psyc. He, Baffle and Riposte were happily married with Cass. Baffle had designed a beautiful house, more art than building, making the line between inside and outside ambivalent with removable outer walls and carpets of living moss along the boundaries. It had been built near the thermal pool and was often the site for gatherings of everyone. After two years, Cass was finally pregnant and her husbands were giddy with joy and almost afraid to touch her. Jesse, smiling, said he would stay at least long enough to see her child.

Numa had given her _nerras_ until she was sixteen; if they did not find a wife before then, she would marry them. Boil had merely shrugged and Shaeeah knew he was secretly pleased. Waxer argued and bemoaned and was angry with Numa; until Cut had spoken four small, simple words to him. "Then get a wife." Waxer grumbled but did not seek out any other woman. Numa's lifeday was very close. She and Saria spoke often.

They had expanded to nysilim production; profitable and labor intensive. There'd been a pirate raid early in the second season; pirates plagued Saleucami because of the lop-sided population skewed to younglings. It had proved a profitable raid for her uncles who had stayed on the farm; almost every raider had a bounty on him, though it had been Suu, Numa, Jek and herself claiming the bounties.

Djinn got his arm amputated by the combine but played chase and tackle all the harder for it. Shaeeah had kissed him once, but she had dreamed of Quad. She apologized to Djinn for what she could not give him. Djinn tried to hide his sorrow, but wasn't good at lying. On the rare visits of Fives and family, Saoha spent time with Djinn in the small house he had built in the shadow of the big rock, near where Crux was buried.

Shy did not pass his psyc and tried to commit suicide in the thermal pool. Djinn found him, saved him, and held him when he cried. Sometimes they slept together for comfort, but nothing beyond that. Just as often Shy slept in his space in the house; where Shaeeah and Numa had once made a comfortable place for Sketch, near the heart of the kitchen. Shy gave his promise to never seek death again. When Cody saw him, he sighed. Shy still saluted like a rookie fresh out of Kamino. "He's never off-duty, Suu. Perhaps he should come with me and Jesse. We, at least, are in military-type situations. We could switch duties with him. At least in his mind." Suu had nodded sadly.

Shaeeah had asked Edge if he would escort her to Dantooine to find Quad. He'd nodded, brusque and silent as usual. Sula and Fives would take them there and wait for four days to determine if she wished to stay. Saoha, Chopper and the children would stay on Saleucami. Kix hesitantly asked to go along. Fives had grinned, laughing softly and nodded, then given Kix a hug that was less brotherly than lover-like.

Dad and mom handed her a season's worth of credits, Jek had given her a hug and a kiss. Kix had given her a small but genuinely useful medical kit. Like everyone else on the farm, she'd been given as much training in medical emergencies as he could provide. Rex and Echo had given her a knife two years ago, sharp and silver edged, as well as lessons in using it. Numa, Boil and Waxer had given her two years of training and if she wasn't the silent forest spirit that Numa could be, she was still very good.

Chopper had sighed softly as he glanced at Saoha who nodded then, grim-faced, he had taken Shaeeah to the farthest edges of the farm where the reaches of geothermal desert touched. They'd camped there for two days. He'd told her about his days as a trooper; told her about war, about desperation, about death. He told her about his scars. He told her about prison, about hate, desolation, pain. He had shown her how to take lives.

Shaeeah had cried to know these things. Until he taught her how to kill, she could still pretend it was an adventure. When they got back to the farm, she was angry at him, not speaking to him, ignoring him until the moment her foot touched the loading ramp of the ship. Suddenly realizing his gift she had whipped around, run to him and held him tightly, her fingers clasped in his short, silver-streaked hair. "Thank you, Chopper," she has whispered in his ear.

Entry onto Dantooine had been fairly simple and they'd landed on a sea of golden grass amid some permanent buildings surrounded by large tents which, in the wind, seemed to breathe like living creatures.

One of the first people she saw while off-loading supplies was Dub. His brows rose in surprise at seeing her, Kix and Edge in addition to Fives and Sula and he'd run up to welcome them. He babbled and laughed at himself for babbling, so pleased to see them.

"It's just a visit for me, Dub." Edge replied. "I have two children and another expected in a couple of months."

Dub started to run off to find Col, but Shaeeah's small hand in the crook of his elbow stopped him.

"Where's Quad?" Shaeeah softly asked and Dub was quiet. He looked down at the grass with a frown.

"He was in an accident, Shaeeah." He saw tears in her eyes. Chaynwa cried sometimes and he knew what to do when women cried. Softly, he hugged her. "He's not the same."

She cried out in anger. " _Di'kut_. The way you spoke, I thought he was dead."

"He might as well be, Shaeeah." Dub replied softly. "Maybe Sula can help, but the clan no longer counts him as a capable man."

"Did he ever marry anyone or have children." She asked.

"He was waiting for you. He talked often but never mentioned your name. Still, we figured out who he loved very quickly." Dub gave her a small grin. "How many women were there at the farm?"

Col was there by then, along with a boy that looked like him. "Colehn, please let your mother know we will have guests for several days. Dub, why don't you help unload?" The boy ran off and Dub moved to the ship's cargo area. "Shaeeah, I suppose you want to see Quad?" She nodded and he sighed. "Sula, would you come with us. Perhaps you can help him in some way."

"What happened, Col?" asked Sula.

"He was trampled in a nerf stampede." Col rubbed his forehead with a rough hand. "We lost two men, Leven broke his arm and Quad was trampled. But they broke the stampede."

Shaeeah nodded her face sad.

"What kind of injuries that I can help with?" asked Sula.

"He finds it difficult to speak or write. Countdown says its like Sinker but worse. We don't know if there's additional brain damage." Col grimaced. "At his best, he's not cooperative. You can't help with the broken back."

He caught Shaeeah's sharp intake of breath and put a comforting arm around her as they walked down the trail.

Shaeeah saw him, recognized him first. He was outside one of the tents on a low cot; his shoulders braced against a back rest, his hair shaggy, but not long.

"What's he doing with his hands?" Sula asked.

"Winding sium thread. It needs to be hand-wound." Col was quiet for an instant. "He can do that."

Shaeeah put her hands in front of Col. "I want to see him without you, Col. Or you Sula, if you can read him this far."

"What do you want, Shaeeah?" Sula asked. Shaeeah's brows curled down.

"Nothing." She said. "Read him for him or for you. But for me, nothing."

Col smiled. "He loved you, Shaeeah."

"But what will he call it now?" she asked, moving forward and leaving them behind.

* * *

Quad tilted his head slightly, recognizing someone's footsteps, but continued winding thread around the wooden spool, he was almost done. Sometimes his weak hand trembled and he had to slow down or stop, but he was useful. It was all he was good for now but it was something.

His brothers took turns caring for him now. He could do one or two personal matters, but that was all. Col, Countdown, Jaac and Dub were in camp at the moment; the others were out herding with Leven's family. Leven had married a large family and then won the most recent festival wrestling contest. Until the next season, the finest bantha bull of Dantooine was in his herd. Leven had invited his brothers to herd their bantha with his. He'd also invited two of Clan Dsayn's cows into the herd and Clan Dsayn had accepted, offering two extra cows for Clan Gwydr's 'work'. Col still owned Clan Dsayn for Layol and Clan Dsayn, embarrassed by his largesse, was still trying to return the riches without dishonoring the gift. Col had asked Clan Sylart about buying Ehveen's first year-marriage child into adoption. It was an intricate dance and Adwr loved it; loved telling Quad about it and asking his advice, planning his moves. Adwr was a patient man, to listen to Quad's stutterings.

Quad liked it best when he was under Col's care. Ehveen was more attentive than Dub's Chaynwa and there were the children. Quad couldn't take care of them, but they were generous with their hugs and two-year old Layol was very good at understanding what he needed, what he wanted. She often curled into his arms for a nap. Jaac's Bird would also curl up with him, rubbing his face with her soft fingers and whispering make-believe stories in his ear. Those were Quad's best moments now, the only thing he looked forward to these days, other than dying.

He felt a hand on his shoulder, probably Ehveen though it hadn't sounded like her footsteps.

 _Moment_. It was what he meant to say. Of course it came out more of a moan with a hard, sibilant breath at the end. He finished the thread onto the spool and set it down.

She still had her hand on his shoulder and he turned his face to give her a smile, though he never really felt like smiling anymore. She was kind, a loving sister-in-law.

Except it wasn't Ehveen.

Quad trembled to see Shaeeah, his expression pure anguish. Then he turned his head away from her.

 _Go away. Go home._ But it only came out a stuttering choke. He turned his head from her. She sat next to him. _Fierfik!_ He couldn't even run away from her. She leaned her head against his shoulder. He didn't move except to tremble. Then he shuddered. He reached for her hand. She gave it to him and he brought it up to his head. Shaeeah must have thought he was going to kiss her hand, but instead he rubbed it against the other side of his head so she could feel the indentation at his temple, where bone had bent to the weight of an animal.

 _Go home, Shaeeah_. He tried, but only broken letters came from his lips. She kissed him softly on his arm. He shook his head, grabbed her hand again, curled her fingers into a fist inside his hand, and hit his leg with her fist several time.

"Ded. Ded." The word came out close enough for her to understand even if he stuttered the _dom_ s. He looked at her. "Ded, ded. kwad, ded."

"Col's coming, Quad." She looked at his expressive brown eyes. She didn't need Sula to confirm that Quad loved her. His anger was sufficient. "Since we'll be his guests, I suppose I should let him introduce me around. It's me, Sula and Edge. Fives is shipside with Kix." She sighed. "Edge says he's quite happy at the farm. I just wanted one of your brothers as an escort." She smiled at him. "I feel safer." She stood, still touching him. "We'll talk later." She saw his grimace as he shook his head.

"Nnnnno." His teeth were gritted. She bent her head over his shoulder.

"You left Saleucami and didn't give me any choice, Quad." Her voice was angry.

He was tired. He could listen to her and she would leave in a day or two. Perhaps he could talk to Edge; convince Edge to kill him. He sighed and gave a grimace. "Kkka." She kissed the side of his face and Quad closed his eyes against the pain of memory.

* * *

Col introduced Ehveen, their eldest son, Colehn, and two younger children. He softly kissed Ehveen and splayed his hand over her rounded belly possessively. "And soon another child." He smiled.

Ehveen showed them to another area of the tent, separated by walls of leather. Edge dropped his pack by one of the pallets after Sula chose the other. Fives and Kix would stay in the ship.

Shaeeah had looked at Ehveen as she kept her pack on her shoulder. "I will be sleeping with Quad." She said.

"I don't think Quad would be happy with that," Ehveen's voice was uncertain.

Shaeeah nodded. "Probably not. But he left me on Saleucami for two years. He can tolerate me for three days."

Sula snorted. "Or longer." Shaeeah couldn't keep her plans from the empath.

"Or longer?" Ehveen's smile was gentle though not understanding. Then she shook her head. "I like Quad, but he is no longer who he was when he first came here. He is not who he was a year ago."

Sula nodded. "He is shattered, Shaeeah. He once was a strong, very physical man. Now he no longer controls himself; his own body is a stranger to him."

"But he's there, isn't he, Sula?" demanded Shaeeah in a firm voice.

Sula nodded. "Physically limited but it is Quad; his intelligence, his desires, his personality."

Shaeeah turned to Ehveen. "If you tell me what I must do for him, then I will do so."

"No, Shaeeah. Not tonight." Sula shook her head. "He is already unsettled by you being here. He will be more unsettled to find you in his room with him." Ehveen agreed with her.

Slowly, Shaeeah nodded. "You're right, Sula. He will need something to be the same." She turned to Col's wife. "You will let me know when he is ready for sleep, when everything has been done?" Ehveen nodded with a smile. Before the stampede, Quad had spoken often of a young woman he loved.

* * *

It was a good visit. They sat around a fire pit, Col and Ehveen with their children, Jaac, Tyrlanya and Bird were there. Dub brought his wife and infant son; Countdown brought his fiancée, Hoscynia. Col and Dub, accompanied by Edge, brought Quad in his cot and sat him by the fire.

Quad made it clear he didn't want to stay and when Col ignored his request by saying, "We have guests and it is polite for everyone to be here.", Quad had made a face and crossed his arms. He had glared at Shaeeah as she sat next to him, passing him some of the kabaps. His hand was crippled, too, the fingers stiffly curved with very little strength. He noted Shaeeah was careful to make sure to give his fingers a little extra time until his grip was firm on the sticks of meat. Quad made sure not to touch her fingers.

After a while, though, he stopped being angry. The company was good. Sula even caught him staring at Shaeeah with painful longing. The children fell asleep and the adults continued speaking on into the night; catching up, making plans. Finally, Quad, feeling his head falling from tiredness, spoke.

"Cccol." Then he turned his head towards his private area.

"Tired, Quad? Ready for sleep?" Col checked.

Quad nodded with a smile. "Ggggg." He couldn't get the words out and he looked to Sula to translate for him for the first time that evening. She smiled at him.

"I think Quad wants to say he's had a good evening and a good visit. He is glad to see everyone." She looked at him with a raised eyebrow and he nodded.

They carried him into his room, separated off by the leather walls, and set him on his pallet. Col sighed as he helped removed Quad's clothes and checked his legs for any sores or bites he wouldn't be able to feel. He often thought Quad had the capacity to do this for himself, but it had become habit. Quad sighed and put his forehead on Col's shoulder. "Sssssshhhhaa." He stuttered quietly.

"She'll be sleeping with you tonight, my brother." He saw panic in his brother's eyes. "Ehveen says Shaeeah will only be here for three days and that you owe Shaeeah two years. Is that so?"

Col always tried to phrase his questions so Quad could answer with a body motion. Quad stared at the wall of the great tent, a stricken look on his face, then closed his eyes and nodded. Quad reached for his clothes, then pointed as he couldn't reach them. Col shook his head. "That's not how you normally sleep." Quad drew back his fist and weakly hit his brother, then collapsed in tears, his shoulders shaking. When Col asked if he really wanted his pants or the tunic, he shook his head. Maybe Shaeeah would leave when she saw him naked.

Shaeeah came in and let the flap fall behind her. He'd pulled the blankets over him, over his legs as much as possible, regretting his decision to be naked. His chest still had some muscle, but his legs were ragged, skin-covered bone.

There was no chance of sex. While little brother had hardened a couple of times since he'd been crippled, he couldn't feel it and there was no reason that Quad could discern when he did function. He hoped she would be happy with hugs and kisses; it was all he had. He hoped she would go home tomorrow. He still had dreams of her, he still loved her; he didn't want to see her pity or, worse, her disgust. He decided against the hugs and kisses. She might think he still loved her.

Silently she pulled off her clothes, her face down, not looking at his face. Then she moved to his side and crawled under his blankets. As he closed his eyes he saw her glance into his face. His jaw was angrily hard, but he couldn't stop the tears except by pressing his eyelids tight. When he opened his eyes he saw she longed to kiss him. Instead she simply rested her head on his arm, tucked her face into his chest, her palms against him. She let loose a deep breath and relaxed.

In a few minutes, Quad was aware of her even breathing. She was asleep. Quad looked at her, free to look at her without trying to speak, without trying to make her understand that he was no longer who he had been when he'd loved her. He'd noticed her lekku, tchun and tchin he remembered fondly, were longer and looked very elegant. If their movement was Twi'lek speech, then she was a woman who was never quiet. Even now, in sleep, they seemed to caress his hands, moving in a gentle wave-like motion in time with her breathing. Gently he slipped the tip of tchin to his lips and gave it a small kiss.

She was more beautiful than ever. Softly, he touched her face with his fingers. She was sixteen, not yet fully grown.

He could do this. For three nights he could watch Shaeeah sleep, renewing his memories – when she had touched him, when she had kissed him, when she had taken her lips to him, when she had asked him to explore her and his final memory; when her little sister had answered to his little brother, when love had been answered by love. He had used those memories often since he'd left Saleucami.

Shaeeah had said she would come to Dantooine when she was old enough and that had been two years from when he left. He had decided to give her three years and was only sometimes convinced she would come at all. Then the accident had happened and he hoped he would never see her again.

Three days he could stand her on Dantooine. Three nights, he could stand her in his bed. He shifted, pulling her closer, hugging his good arm around her, putting his cheek on her head and softly kissing her. She murmured something in her sleep.

Quad woke the next morning with her warmth against him, her breath on the skin above his heart, his arms tight around her. He loosened his grip, gently rubbed her back. She woke, smiling at him. Her eyebrows rose, asking him a question. He frowned. Was she mocking him with her silence? She saw this and simply sighed. She got out of his bed and Quad gave a soft groan to see her nakedness. She came back and knelt at his side. She picked up his hand; it was his good hand, and gave the palm a soft kiss, then placed his hand on her breast. For an instant he let his hand linger, then he let it fall as he looked down in sorrow. There was no need to give either of them false hopes. She put on her clothes and left his room with no words.

Col came in shortly after surprised to see Quad had dressed himself. "Thread house?" he asked Quad.

"Nnn." Quad shook his head.

"Then where?"

Quad thought of several options even while he was shaking his head, refusing them all. Finally he sighed.

"Ooouusi."

"Outside?" Col questioned with a frown.

Quad nodded.

"Is by the doorway good enough?" Quad nodded again.

It had been a good day to simply be outside. The children came to visit and Sula and Edge sat with him for a good portion of the day. Fives and Kix also sat with him for a while. Then it had been dark and he hadn't seen Shaeeah all day. Quad decided that was good thought it hurt. She must have decided there was no future in staying on Dantooine.

Col carried him to his bed telling him that Shaeeah had gone herding with the children. He laughed as he told Quad how she had milked one of the big cows and gotten a face full of blue milk. Quad had grinned. He remembered the first time he tried milking one of the bantha cows. He'd gotten a face full of milk and then drooled upon as her calf licked his face. He reminded Col of that incident and they both chuckled in memory.

Shaeeah came the second night as well and Quad sighed. She disrobed as she entered his room, pushing aside the leather. _Beautiful_ , Quad thought. He opened up the blanket inviting her into his warmth even as he revealed his dead-still legs, his dead penis for her view.

"Ded, Ssha..a." He said with only a minimum of stuttering and a twisted frown. She looked at him, but said nothing.

Again, she curled up next to him. He groaned but couldn't help putting his arms around her. Her face was tilted up to his and he knew she wanted a kiss. He bent his head to hers, but couldn't bear giving her a kiss so he dropped his face into the curve of her neck. She smelled so good, warm and spicy, like winter tea. He loved her. He still loved her. He just couldn't let her know.

When she slept, her breathing soft and even, Quad kissed her. He kissed her face, her delicate ears, her lekku. He grasped tchun and tchin in his hands, gently tugging on them, squeezing them softy. He put tchin in his mouth, teased it gently with his teeth, then sucking on the tip.

Shaeeah gave a low moan in her sleep and Quad froze. He noticed her nipples were tightening and he knew that if he touched the cleft between her legs she'd be wet. He stopped, knowing that what he'd just done had been wrong. It took him a long time to fall asleep _. I'm sorry, Shaeeah_ , he told himself.

She woke with a smile and a gentle groan of pleasure in her throat, early in the morning, before sunrise. Stretching, she smiled up at Quad. She'd had good dreams. He smiled at her, gently took her chin by the back of his crippled hand and kissed her softly on the lips. She quivered as she carefully placed her hands around his face and kissed him, not quite as softly. She felt him swallow, felt the quivering in his arms and chest, but he pulled her close with an arm, letting his fingers slide down her back. He closed his eyes, bringing his face to hers. He kissed whatever his lips touched; from her lekku to her lips, from her ears to her neck. Slowly his lips drew downward to her breasts even as she stretched upward. His lips reached down to suck at her nipple, even as his hand reached up to cup her breast. She moaned, her hands covering his head, pulling him to her. He sucked at her breasts, pulling them with his lips, gently nipping them with his teeth. Slowly his hand cupped around one breast then slid down her belly, pausing on the curve of her pleasure.

"Sssha," he moaned with a breath, his eyes watching hers. He slid his good hand between her legs, slowly pressed one finger against her opening and felt her wetness. His groan turned into a whimper and tears filled his eyes. For him, as broken and destroyed as he was, she still had rivers of wetness, rivers of want, for him.

His arms, one at least, was still strong and he pulled her into an easy position for him. He remembered the rhythms of her body, the nub that brought her so much pleasure just a knuckles-distance above her opening. She was so tiny, her opening only accepting one finger, but he knew that as he pleasured her with his tongue, she could accept more and she loved the feeling of his fingers stroking her.

He wished… so many things. He pressed the side of his head against her thigh opening her gently with his fingers. He circled her pleasure with his tongue, then probed and lapped. She writhed, her body bucking then quivering as she stilled, wanted more of his tongue on her. His fingers, first one then another, curved inside her, slowly pulling out, then quickly thrusting in.

Her breathing was wild now, her hips gliding up to meet his tongue, to press herself against his fingers, her voice called his name. She was louder than tent etiquette called for, but it was his name she was calling and if she shouted it for the entire camp to hear, he didn't care. All he cared was that she would peak, flowing rivers of desire then, sated, she would curl into his arms, to kiss him to all distraction.

Her hips tensed, her entire body was taut, like a pulled bow. He lapped at her wetness, massaging her nub with his tongue, his lips, his crippled hand. Three fingers of his able hand pushed and pulled in and out of her to the tempo of her need.

She came in a wild cry of his name that brought joy into his heart. The tension of her body released in waves of pleasure that pulled at his fingers. The tightness of her curled fingers in his hair relaxed into fingertips that curved around his face. She came in tears and bubbling sobs, crying his name.

Then she kissed him. Slowly and softly at first, then harder and not just on his face; but on his chest where she sucked and played with his nipples. Nibbling his neck, softly sucking on his ears, more roughly on his neck. Kissing him, as he wished, to all distraction. Shaeeah. His Shaeeah. His wonderful, sweet, sexy Shaeeah.

They fell asleep again she curled in his arms, until much later in the morning when they heard Col's voice.

"Shaeeah, I'll be going. If you want to come out to the calving pastures, you'll have to come now because I am leaving".

Quad gave her a lop-sided grin and pushed at her, then gestured with his hand for her to go. She quickly dressed and was gone. Sula, Kix and Edge came in shortly after to see him staring at his crippled hand in grim determination. He had dressed himself and was sitting on a low chair with bare feet, unable to manage shoes. As they entered, he had raised his head and stared hard at Sula. She had smiled.

"Emotions, Quad. Zeltrons are not very good at words."

Again he frowned then made a motion with his hands even as he spoke. "Dddaa pad." Edge nodded as he rose and left. He returned in a few moments with a data pad and handed it to Quad.

Quad wrote slowly, frowned at the scrawl, and turned it to Sula with hope. She stared at it for a moment, trying to decipher what he'd written.

"Wong." He frowned and shook his head. "Wossen Sssnkr."

"Prognosis?" She glanced at him and he nodded fiercely; wanting, needing to know the truth and finally willing to listen.

"You have a broken back. I don't think there's anything to be done about that." She glanced at Kix who shook his head. "Perhaps a powerchair or hydraulic prosthesis for getting around." She leaned closer to him, her hand touching his arm. His fingers came up and stroked hers. "Your head. Well, you've gotten lazy in your intellect. But your intellect, my dear Quad, it's all still there. You were wounded, and so your brain rested and healed. But you let your intellect get lazy. Your aphasia is both verbal and written, like Sinker's but more pronounced in words. I don't believe it is affected in relation to maps and numbers. There is the partial paralysis of the arm and hand, Quad. I don't know. I think it will always be there. It is a part of you and you will always struggle. The clot that was in your brain has disintegrated, but the damage has been done. With practice it will be easier to communicate."

Kix spoke. "With practice and therapy you could get better at speaking, at improving the dexterity in your fingers, at doing more. I've noticed some people, Col and Ehveen in particular, have developed a way of speaking to you that simplifies your part. That hasn't helped you in the long term. How much therapy have you had?" Quad's blush told him how little that had been. "You just gave up there, didn't you?"

Quad nodded and looked at Sula.

"Because you knew you couldn't go back to being what you had been." She translated for him.

He frowned, looked down at the floor, and let Sula have his secret shame.

Tears flooded her eyes. "Oh, Quad. No."

He nodded and he made a wide gesture to the others. Tttell."

"He wanted to die. He had hoped to convince one of you, most likely Edge, to kill him."

"It wouldn't have happened, Quad." Edge shook his head.

"Gggd," nodded Quad then he turned back to Kix. "Wwk." He pressed his fingers to his chest then pointed a finger at Kix. "Ddo ther.." Kix waited, making Quad say the entire word. "Ttthhher. Appy."

Quad spent all day with Sula and Kix, discussing possibilities. Asking Ehveen questions, speaking with Adwr.

Col had been teasing Shaeeah about that morning with Quad; telling her even Ehveen had never been that … enthusiastic. Perhaps Quad would no longer lack willing partners. She had smiled. "I'm hoping they will lack, Col. I'm hoping that Quad chooses to return to Saleucami."

"If he doesn't, Shaeeah, what then?" He asked and she shrugged.

"I ask you to sponsor me for immigration."

He sighed. "You know that clones don't deal very well with debilitating conditions."

"No, I didn't."

"I'm healthy. I might have had twenty more years, certainly no more than that without Cody's inoculation. Quad might have had five. There's no telling now; even with the inoculation." He shrugged. "When faced with conditions that prevent optimum use, our bodies just start to shut down. It was built into us."

Shaeeah nodded. "Does Quad know this?"

"I'm sure he does."

"Then he won't break my heart by dying with my father. I won't be putting both of them in the ground at the same time." She looked at Col with tears in her eyes. "It was why he left. He didn't want to break my heart by having me bury him and my father at the same time."

"That's not likely to happen, Shaeeah." Col put his arm around her.

It was their last night and, again, they ate as a group. All of Quad's brothers, and only his brothers, were there. The women of Dantooine had shyly left them to speak among themselves, taking Shaeeah and Sula to gossip among the women at the thread house. Dub and Col made kind jokes about Quad stealing away the women. Quad had shrugged then spoke. "Nnnt sstay." He stuttered a long time through the words. "Ggggo Ssha." But they were his brothers and they were patient.

He was ready that night when Shaeeah came to his little room, removing her clothing. Quad watched, saw her beauty and her grace. Quad smiled.

"Shha. Booful." Again it took him a long time to get out the words. Shaeeah simply waited for him. She came to him, nude and naked, tears in her eyes, kissing him.

"I love you, Quad."

"Llllov ou, Shha, llov ou." He wasn't quite pleased with his words, so he reached out for her hand and brought her fingers to his lips, kissing them. Slowly he formed the last word, wanting it to be perfect.

"Anything."


	20. FOR HARUU II - EFFECTS OF NUMA

**Effects of Numa**

CT-4093 leaned, just for the moment, on the edge of the broken stone wall and looked around. Mostly he saw destruction and desolation, ruins of houses the same red and orange shade of the ground. Here and there he saw the dusky grey-green of weeds growing in crevices of broken rock and shattered walls. He shook his head in melancholy sadness and heard a small rattle.

That _kriffing_ chert pebble was still in his helmet. He cussed and looked around. There was only a Twi'lek nearby, a young female, scrounging around one of the buildings. She wasn't obviously armed. Ninety-three decided it might be ok to remove his bucket and find that pebble that had been intermittently bothering him for seven klicks. He had learned to seal his boots, as well as the armor of his legs and arms, against the sand and grit of Ryloth; but how could one expect a pebble in the helmet?

He pulled off the helmet and shook it over the ground. Nothing came out. He cursed and hit the side of it with his hand.

"Is anything wrong?"

By the time ninety three had catalogued it as a woman's voice and non-hostile and probably the woman who'd been scrounging near the buildings and how the _kriff_ had she snuck up on him anyway; he had jumped up, pulled his blaster and had his finger on the trigger.

Non-hostile was always an iffy call and he had survived the Clone War as well as nearly a decade as a stormtrooper by being prepared for anything.

She glanced down at the blaster and took a small, very small, step back. "I'm sorry I startled you." She looked into his eyes then smiled softly. "You took off your helmet and I wanted to see your face."

He glared at her then shoved the blaster into its holster. "Yeah, right," he muttered as gave the helmet another hit to loosen the pebble. "Same as anyone else." He meant clone and she knew it.

"Really." Her eyes inspected his face, lingering on the lines of his eyes, noting the scar that ran crookedly down his nose. It was his only distinguishing face mark though he had a few more scars on his body.  Being prepared didn't always work.

She was almost as tall as him, but slender. He wondered if she needed food, she was probably scavenging for something edible among the weeds or something she could trade in the market for food. He reached for a ration stick.

He jerked his head up, suddenly realizing he was talking to a civilian, to a woman, and it wasn't him commanding her or him demanding information. It was… different. He narrowed his eyes and observed her, the way she was standing, the positioning of her arms.

She wasn't afraid of him.

He looked down at the ground. Not yet, anyway. Not until the squad caught up with him and she'd be alone with him and five of his brothers. Women always got scared then. Eighty two encouraged it by yelling at them or growling like a wookie then laughing. Seventeen tried to be nice, offering them a ration stick and talking softly. Forty-seven measured them with his eyes then leered at them.  Forty seven had once been in interrogation until someone realized he enjoyed his work too much.

"I saw one of you last week, but you look older than him." She nodded, as if in confirmation to herself. "Much the same but older."

Ninety-three laughed with no humor. "Exactly the same. There isn't a molecule's worth of difference between him and me except time and scars."

"But he's dead and you're alive." She looked around and found a place to sit on the wall. Unnervingly, she patted the space beside her and tilted her head expectantly. He took a step closer. Surely she didn't mean for him to sit next to her?

"And I found out I had a question I wanted to ask but he was dead." She glanced down at the stone then at him with a questioning look. "I did something illegal. I buried him. I know we're supposed to report things like that, but it was late in the day and I'd seen gutkurr tracks" She frowned. "I didn't want him to be scavenged. I dug a shallow hole by a hill and there were two stones that I pushed over on top of his grave."

Ninety-three thought a moment. He sat down, not close enough to alarm her but close enough to touch. If she wanted to.  As if touching the plasteel plates of his armor meant anything. Maybe it was a dare between her and some friends. He glanced around but there was no one else in sight.

"I'm glad you buried him." Ninety-three genuinely was glad he'd been buried. There was something unsettling about recovering remains scavenged by predators, half-eaten, half-digested, and torn apart. "Can you remember where? We need to identify and confirm him dead rather than AWOL."  He grunted.  As if a clone was ever granted leave.  It was a stupid acronym.

"If you'll answer my question." She had a nice voice, soft and low with harmonious undertones and a cadence he found relaxing.

He shook his head. "I can't tell you…"

She smiled. She really was very pretty. Her eyes were a velvet brown, almost the color of his only slightly darker. "There is so much you can't tell me and that's alright. I am not interested in things like field maneuvers or passcodes. Simply, do you have a name?

"Ninety-three," he replied automatically.

"I'm Nerri," she responded and held out her hand almost in a brother's clasp. Ninety-three stared at it for a moment then at her, before tentatively reaching out his hand. For an instant, he wished he wasn't wearing his gauntlets and wondered if her slender green fingers would feel warm or cool to his touch.

"That's a Twi'lek word for sister. Isn't it?" He hadn't been flash-trained in the language, but a stormtrooper picked up a little language where ever he was.

"And ninety-three is a number." She shrugged. "Names are such odd things. If they had asked me what I would prefer to be call, it wouldn't have been Nerri." She looked at him and wrinkled her nose in humor. "It's so… prosaic. So average. Half the girls on Ryloth are named Nerri. Who would I be if I weren't Nerri? Would my name be Serina do you think? Or Ahsari perhaps? Lyrical and sweet yet with some strength; that's the name I would want."

She saw him relax a tiny bit; the wrinkles around his eyes deepened. His lips were relaxed and the corners turned up into an almost-smile. She smiled back. "And if you weren't ninety-three, what would your name be?"

His weathered face became hard then and he glanced down at his helmet, contemplated slamming it onto his head and leaving.

"I'm ninety-three. It's not a name. It's my designation; CT-18-4093. Clone Trooper, eighteenth batch, fortieth crèche, ninety-third embryo. It is who I am."

"Oh." There was pity in her eyes and ninety-three both recognized and hated it. He slammed on his helmet and turned his back to her. He could see the dust trail of his squad coming up the hill. He turned again, speaking to her. "You'd better leave…"

But she was already half-way to the building. It was only later that he realized even Seventeen wasn't that quiet.

Ninety-three looked for her occasionally.  A little in Nabat and the surrounding villages, but mostly when his squad went on patrol. He'd move on ahead or linger behind. Once they'd passed by the building, now bombed out ruins, where he'd seen her. The squad decided it was a good place for a rest. Ninety-three was worried she'd be there, but she wasn't and for that, he was glad.

Then they got orders. The squad was being transferred halfway around Ryloth.  From Nabat to the capital of Lessu. Ninety three didn't look for her anymore though he couldn't help inspecting Twi'lek faces when he and the squad were on patrol. Today, his last in Nabat, was no different. Tomorrow he'd be on a transport and the day after he'd be doing patrol in Lessu.

It was a market day that happened to coincide with a festival day. The streets were more crowded than usual with Twi'leks and a smattering of other races; the market more packed with goods and entertainers. The mood of the people was jovial. Some few even laughingly called greetings to the stormtroopers.

Bringing up the rear, Ninety-three was having a hard time keeping visual track of the rest of the squad in the crush of bodies. He switched to HUD locator map occasionally, not really caring if he bumped into people. They usually made room for the armed troopers.

Suddenly she was at his side. Beneath his helmet, Ninety-three smiled for no reason that he was aware of except she was at his side. Still, he kept watch, his eyes and monitors scanning the marketplace.

"Hello Ninety-three."

"How do you know I'm Ninety-three?"

"You have that gouge in the plate of your blaster." She pointed to a long scratch he would have repaired when it had happened, except they were short of the special blacking paint. It didn't peel from the blaster heat, it heat-tempered to the barrel. The shipment hadn't been kept properly cooled and had cooked solid in the heat of Ryloth.

He thought for a moment. "You're observant, Nerri." He deadened his emotions, his smile fading as he slammed down the pleasure that had been there a moment earlier. That meant she was probably a rebel. That meant this marketplace encounter could be a trap. He went closed channel to his squad. "Possible rebel activity noted."

Seventeen snorted back and Eighty-two laughed. There was always possible rebel activity in the market. Still, they'd prepare for the possibility of an attack; they'd be ready.

"I've often been told that observation is a vital skill of survival." Her voice was as soft as her skin looked. "Especially in war."

He decided the harmonious tones were almost a purr of pleasure. 

He really didn't want to be with her now, not if she were a rebel. Not if he'd have to kill her.

"You're on duty. I don't suppose you could take off your helmet now," she sighed wistfully.

"No." His voice was brusque as he only now remembered how her eyes had seen his face before. He'd gone back to the barracks and looked at his weathered and scarred face in a mirror wondering why she had seemed to take such pleasure in inspecting his face.

She continued speaking, adroitly staying at his side in spite of the crowds. "I'm leaving Nabat and I was looking for you to say 'good-bye'."

"Good-bye." Ninety-three felt relief. She'd be going and whether she was a rebel or not, he wouldn't be the one to kill her.

Instead, she laughed. "Not like that," she smiled and reached out to touch him, but let her hand drop short of his armor. "I had a nicer good-bye planned."

Ninety-three stopped short, jerked motionless by the suddenness of his thought. She continued walked a few steps before realizing he had halted, frozen in his steps.

 _She'd been_ _looking_ _for him? She had_ _planned_ _? She had planned something_ _nice_ _? She had wanted to say 'good-bye' to_ _him_ _?_

She turned around and tilted her head. "Does that surprise you?"

He looked around, scanning the crowd. He couldn't see his squad anywhere though his helmet had their positions overlaid on the map he had called up. "It shocks me. I'm just a clone and…"

Nerri shook her head. "You are _not_ 'just a clone', Ninety-three."

He had practiced his response in his mind, in case he met up with her again.

"I had a name once." He took the step to her side. "Dex."

Nerri smiled brightly and Ninety-three – no, Dex - smiled in his helmet. It was a risk, if the sergeant ran his helmet vids, he would receive a reprimand for claiming a name.

"That's a wonderful name. Much better than Nerri."

He laughed. "I happen to like Nerri."

"What does Dex mean? All names mean something, don't they?"

He nodded. "It's for dexterity. I was originally in EOD." He slung the blaster rifle back onto his shoulder and held out his wiggling fingers for her observation. "All ten original equipment. I was very good." He paused and brought the rifle back into ready. "You wouldn't happen to be going to Lessu?"

Nerri look up into his face, into his helmet. He knew it was disconcerting to look into the black slits and white anonymity but she simply smiled as though she were looking at his face. "No."

He sighed heavily. "I was hoping I might see you there." He hadn't said he was being reassigned but it was there if she wanted to notice." She shook her head and Dex thought it was a sad motion.

"I understand there is fighting in the capital. You will be careful, won't you, Dex?"

Why would she care? But it ran through his head that she might. Maybe she'd known another clone trooper before. He'd heard rumors; he'd even seen one of his brothers laughing with a civilian woman after the battle of Coruscant. That had been Flick; before the Empire took away their names. Flick had died on Kashyyyk soon afterwards, some six or seven years past.

"As careful as keeping my fingers." He assured her.

"I still have my question. From our previous conversation." She lightly put her arm to touch him. Although it was on his armor, Dex thought he could feel her warm fingers through the plasteel.

"I'd like to know where the dead trooper is buried, Nerri," he said, remembering the bargain they had started to make then.

"He's at the eastern-most foot of Rylkurra Hill. I mentioned the two stones I pushed over, Dex; they should be easy to find."

Dex nodded; a smile on his face she couldn't see. He hadn't thought of himself as 'Dex' in a long time. For some reason it felt good, much better than Ninety-three. He couldn't imagine why the Empire had forbidden names; it gave a man pride to have a name.

"I didn't mention that I came back the next day and painted a bendu on one of the stones."

He sighed. "You are a rebel."

"I do have rebel tendencies, Dex," she admitted. "But I have never fired a blaster at a trooper or," Her fingers lightly brushed his. "Or set any explosives or any traps. I don't know any rebel affiliates on Ryloth." She stopped in the street. "I have never injured a trooper." She looked at him through his helmet again. "You can see that, can't you? You can scan my body and see that my blood rate hasn't gone up or my voice gone quivery. You can see that I'm not lying. Can't you?"

Dex nodded. "Yes, Nerri. I can see that. Your readings are a little off from normal, but you're not lying."

She turned quickly, but not before he saw the jade blush of her cheeks. He frowned. _What's that about?_

"I just want to know if you've ever been kissed." Her voice was soft and hesitant.

Dex was struck dumb. He looked down the road where the squad was nowhere to be seen among the crowded bodies enjoying the open market and festivities. He flicked the locators on his HUD. Everything was fine, everyone in place. He frowned. Why the _kriff_ would a civilian want to know that? His cheeks burned under his helmet.

"Once," he mumbled. "By a port woman. She found out quick enough that I didn't have any money."

Nerri was walking beside him, her head down, as though in mourning.

"Dex, will you take your helmet off for me?" Her voice was soft.

Saying nothing, Dex moved to an alleyway, his hand lightly clasped around her wrist. She could pull away if she wanted.

Agilely, she followed. She slowed just enough that his fingers slipped from her wrist into her hand. Her fingers curled around his. Once in the alley, he glanced both ways then scanned through his helmet. Besides her, there was no one around except people in the main market area. He pulled off his helmet, his face tense and his eyes searching her face.

She touched the palm of her hand to the rough skin of his cheek. He closed his eyes in trust. One finger brushed against the scar across his nose, then both hands came up and stroked under his eyes, toward his temples. _Kriff_ , it felt good. He groaned deep in his throat. She guided his face down with her hand. He shivered, knowing, anticipating, fearing what was to come. He opened his eyes, just a small bit. He wanted to see her.

It was a kiss soft and sweet. Her lips pressed against his, moist and warm.  Her breath was flavored with spice tea. Her eyes were mostly closed and his own eyes drifted shut as he swore he'd never forget this gift. She finished the kiss, pressing her face against his. Her skin was softer than anything he'd ever felt. His hands came to her shoulders, his fingers touched her skin, stroking her neck back to her lekku. His thumbs cradled her jaw as his fingers supported the back of her head. There was a tear sliding down the hollow beside her nose and he touched it with his thumb. She bent her head against his chest and Dex wished he wasn't wearing his chest plate. He wondered how it would feel to hold her against his skin; to feel the movement of her breath, the warmth of her skin.

"For me," she whispered though there was no need. "You are Dex. I will always remember you, Dex." She moved then took a step down the alleyway then turned back and once again kissed him, her arms around his neck. He kissed her back as though he'd never kiss again; memorizing her, the taste of her lips, the scent of her skin.

Something had changed and he would never be the same.


End file.
